#thinkofmedejavu

[midnightpillsnacking]

[Loulou*di S3V4 L 3-20] Hana-Doll 3rd Season THINK OF ME:DEJA VU Translation

Translation below the cut. Google Drive link | Listen to the album on Spotify

(Rui knocks on the door.)

Rui: Toki-bou. Is it alright if I come in?

(Rui enters the room.)

Rui: (draws the curtain) You’re awake.

Toki: …

Rui: (rifling through a wardrobe) Shall we go with these clothes for today? Or would you rather these? No, let’s just go with the set that’s hanging over there. Once, Ageha praised you when you wore it, and you seemed pleased by that.

(Rui walks over to Toki’s bed.)

Rui: Toki-bou. Can you sit up?

Toki: …

Rui: Allow me. (lifts Toki) … You’ve gotten a little lighter. I’ll propose to the medical team to revise your nutrition management. But before that, let’s get you changed. … Ah, we can’t forget about this–your stuffed bear. It’s something important to you, isn’t it? I’ll leave it by your hand.

(The door opens from behind.)

Ageha: How disgusting.

Rui: Ageha. Were you watching again?

Ageha: Are you saying that I have a sick hobby? That’s rich coming from a man who plays with dolls.

Rui: You told me to look after Toki-bou. I’ll stop doing it if you tell me to do so.

Ageha: … Do whatever you want.

(Ageha leaves.)

Rui: …Toki-bou, you dropped this. … Right now, you may not be that much different from me. (to himself) My true wish, huh…?

Toki: … hm…

Rui: Toki-bou. Toki-bou, are you alright?

Toki: … Rui-san?

Rui: Good morning, Toki-bou.

Toki: Why are you… in my room? And these clothes…

Rui: It may be our off day, but it’s not healthy to lay in bed all the time. And I came here to help you get changed.

Toki: Our off day… is when we don’t have work. Rui-san, was I a burden?

Rui: Nothing of the sort. With the Music Awards coming up, our schedules have been adjusted to accommodate some time for rest.

Toki: How about Ageha-san…?

Rui: If you’re asking where he is, he should be in the living room. He mentioned that he needed to do some final touches to prepare for the performance.

Toki: Then… What should I do?

Rui: You… should do as you like.

Toki: What I like…?

Rui: … The weather’s pleasant today. It would be nice to step out for a walk.

-

(Rui and Toki enter a shop)

Rui: We visited this patisserie before.

Toki: Hm? No, I’ve never been here before.

Rui: I see. The company finances this establishment. There’s nobody else in this shop except for us. Go ahead and pick whatever desserts you like.

Toki: Desserts I… like?

Rui: … It says here that their recommendation is the seasonal fruit tart.

Toki: Should we pick that?

Rui: No, we don’t have to make a decision right now. Let’s take a look at the rest. They have other kinds of desserts aside from tarts.

Toki: There’s too many to choose from.

Rui: Which seems good to you?

Toki: What about you, Rui-san?

Rui: Hm?

Toki: Which is your favorite out of everything here?

Rui: … The sachertorte from here… was something Ageha once took a liking to.

Toki: Ageha-san did? … What are these over here?

Rui: That’s an opera cake.

Toki: Both seem to suit Ageha-san.

Rui: The shortcake over here seems to be something that you would like the look of. It might appear simplistic, but the soft white stands out in a vibrant showcase.

Toki: … You’re right.

Rui: Let’s go with that for our first pick. 

Toki: But… Why are we buying it? Today’s our off day, so it’s not like we would need it for a shoot.

Rui: The purpose is for us to take it back to the dorm to eat. 

Toki: Eh?

Rui: But… If you’re asking why we’re buying cake, or even for a more basic explanation, then I myself don’t really understand.

Toki: You don’t understand, but you still purposely come all the way here?

Rui: Yes. Just that… When I was still living with my family, I often did this kind of thing with my younger brothers. At the time, I didn’t understand what my brothers were excited about, but the look on their faces is something that I suddenly recalled.

Toki: Really… 

Rui: If… you want a goal that you can accomplish as part of Loulou*di, after we buy the cakes, shall we invite Ageha to have tea with us to talk about it?

Toki: That sounds like a good idea.

Rui: Great. Then, let’s choose the next cake. I’ll let Ageha know that you were the one who picked it out for him.

Toki: Got it. 

-

Rui: We’re back.

Ageha: Rui. Where the hell were you?

Rui: The patisserie the company is partnered with. 

Ageha: And you took him with you?

Toki: …

Rui: There was no one but us in the shop. The risk was at the minimum, so there’s nothing to worry about. 

Ageha: Wouldn’t it be nice if that were the case.

Rui: We bought some cakes. Do you want to have tea?

Ageha: Tea…? You must be joking. You’re asking me to have a tea party at such a busy time like this? The two of you can do whatever you like with just yourselves.

Rui: Toki-bou chose a cake for you.

Ageha: Toki did…? 

Rui: Yes. 

Ageha: … (sighs) 30 minutes. After that, I’m gone.

Rui: Alright. I’ll prepare the tea. Toki-bou, lay out the dishes and the cakes.

Toki: Yes, understood.

Rui: Something like this happened before. Toki-bou also picked out a dessert for you and the three of us ate together. Do you remember?

Ageha: Me, doing something like that? Rui, could you keep your sick fantasies to yourself?

Rui: Did you forget, Ageha?

Ageha: What?

Rui: I’m asking if you forgot.

Ageha: … Shut up and eat.

Rui: Sure.

(The three of them eat quietly.)

Rui: Toki-bou, how is it?

Toki: Yes, it’s delicious.

Rui: That’s good. Is the tea enough for you?

Toki: Yes, it’s enough.

Ageha: You can drop the diligent butler act now. Do you genuinely want to play house with dolls that much? 

Rui: You told me to look after Toki-bou. I’m simply following your instructions.

Ageha: …tch.

Rui: …

Ageha: … You look like you have something to say.

Rui: No, it’s nothing. You’re always in the right.

Ageha: In the right…? Are you the one that decides whether what I do is right or wrong?

Rui: That wasn’t what I meant. 

Ageha: I wonder. Are you trying to judge me for putting you in charge of Toki?

Rui: Ageha, calm down. Don’t exert yourself. It’s not good for you.

Ageha: … What’s good for me…? What the hell do you even know about me?

Rui: Ageha, I–

Ageha: Are you trying to say you understand me? Bastard who doesn’t even know the meaning of righteous… What do you think you’re trying to pull?!

(Ageha shoves some crockery off the table and breaks them.)

Rui: Ageha.

Ageha: … Do you doubt the Loulou*di I aim for? 

Rui: I wouldn’t dream of it.

Ageha: Are you unhappy that Toki turned out like this?! 

Rui: Do you intend to kill me… with those hands of yours?

Ageha: (starts to strangle Rui) Are you testing me? I’m not reversing a single criterion for grabbing you by the neck.

Rui: It seems like you wouldn’t… There’s not a drop of strength in your fingers.

Ageha: Strength…? I’ll show you, dammit…! (strangles Rui further) Putting on a poker face and agreeing to everything I say, when deep down you’re laughing at me, right? You’re thinking that the path I aspire towards is nothing but a mistake!

Rui: The thought has never once crossed my mind. 

(Rui grabs Ageha.)

Ageha: Let me go!

Rui: You’re not mistaken.

Ageha: Ah, you’re right, I’m not mistaken! For me… For Toki… In this world, those that fall from the stage lose, no matter the reason. Even Toki knows that! That’s why he chose this. He reveres the path I chose for him!

Rui: Calm down, Ageha. You’re agitating your body.

Ageha: I told you I don’t need your concern! If you wish to see me suffer so badly, then wipe that look off your face!

Rui: ‘Wish’...?

Ageha: Agitating my body? So what? No matter what happens, I will never fall from the stage. I’ll scale to the same peak Chihiro did, I’ll surpass him, I’ll prove to the world the human that I am!

Rui: Ageha, you–

Ageha: Move! 

(Ageha shoves Rui and grabs Toki.)

Toki: …

Ageha: Toki. Toki!

Rui: Ageha, stop. Toki-bou is–!

Ageha: Listen up, Toki! I couldn’t care less if you’re a doll or anything else, but I’m sick of having our activities halted. Just why do you even want to be an idol, huh? Forget all you want, but don’t you ever forget the scum who made you like this. Do not forget your hatred! If you forget your hatred, then you would never know of happiness. Your happiness is with Loulou*di. No matter what happens, don’t you ever forget that!

Toki: Yes, Ageha-san.

Ageha: Don’t let yourself be taken over. I won’t forgive you if you die. You came so far and chose to be with Loulou*di. That will of yours… is what I will acknowledge. 

Toki: Yes, Ageha-san.

Ageha: Don’t yield to anything or anyone else but me. Whatever your reason to live, wherever you want to set your sights on, I will never abandon you. Whatever I told you that day, make sure to etch them onto your heart.

Toki: Yes, Ageha-san.

Ageha: You’re not a vessel to be unjustly oppressed and trampled on. You’re an irreplaceable member who will never become a failure and who chose to fight. You were placed in a unit suited to you, as a human suited for Loulou*di. Not just anyone… but I, myself, will acknowledge that. 

Toki: …

Ageha: What do you think? Who… are you?

Toki: I am… Sakurai Toki… of Loulou*di.

Ageha: Ah, I see. That’s good. Then, everything…

Toki: … (collapses)

Rui: (rushes over) Toki-bou, are you alright?

Toki: Rui-san, why are you asking something like that? I’m happy. Ageha-san acknowledges me. Rui-san is holding my hand. I’m needed, I’m loved by the people I treasure… By the both of you, by the fans. If I can be an existence befitting of Loulou*di, then I’ll always, always, forever…

Rui: That’s… Is that what you truly wish for? …Ageha.

Ageha: Rui. Follow me until the very end.

Rui: The very end… Ageha, I…

Ageha: Will you take my hand? Or will you reject it? What will you do?

Rui: I didn’t have a choice to reject your hand to begin with. There was never such a choice.

Ageha: (laughs) Rui. Toki. Listen carefully. We will never let the world of Loulou*di be tainted, nor expose its hideous state. I will never forgive anything that betrays the fans. We’re professional idols. We have always been, and we will always be. We’ll continue to wager our lives upon this stage. We will never let ourselves be swallowed by the will of the flowers. We’ll come out on top and stand proud and perfect on the stage until the very end. The time has come. Finally, the Music Awards…!

Rui: The words ‘to wager our lives’... in an era where there are plenty of expressions to mean the same thing, the words Ageha said didn’t lose their gravity, and were not things to speak of lightly. Just what is an ‘idol’? Why do we sing? Why do we talk about dreams? Like an imperfect human to take one step closer to becoming a perfect god, the flowers free us from our distortions and our abnormalities. But even as we carry on with our lives as we rightfully should, if we can become normal humans, then will we be able to see through all the deception…? Will I finally be able to know my true wish…?

(End of Hana-Doll Think of Me:DEJA VU (Season 3, Volume 4 of Loulou*di))

[midnightpillsnacking]

[Loulou*di S3V4 L 3-16] Hana-Doll 3rd Season THINK OF ME:DEJA VU Translation

Translation below the cut. Google Drive link | Listen to the album on Spotify

(Door opens)

Staff Member A: Good morning.

Toki: (breathing slowly)

Staff Member A: Do you know your own name?

Toki: I’m… Sakurai Toki. Isn’t that right?

Staff Member A: Yes. Seems like you slept well.

Toki: You can tell?

Staff Member A: From the decline in your sleep activity and muscle activity, yes. While you were asleep, did you have any dreams?

Toki: Dreams…?

Staff Member A: It’s alright if you can’t remember in full detail. Bits and pieces of it would be sufficient. When you closed your eyes, did you see anything?

Toki: I saw… a lot of light.

Staff Member A: Light? What was the light like?

Toki: It was… endless and everywhere, like stars. It was like I could stare at it forever. It was a sight I could never look away from. And sometimes… I could hear it. Voices upon voices that saw me for who I am.

Staff Member A: And how did you feel during that experience?

Toki: How I ‘felt’...? 

Staff Member A: Please try to put your thoughts into words.

Toki: I thought… that this was where I belonged. The light proved to me my reason to live, my reason to exist. I felt that I had to reach my ideal, to transform into the perfect being.

Staff Member A: What is your ideal?

Toki: In the world called ‘Loulou*di’ that Ageha-san will create, I will live as one of the gears that makes it revolve. I want nothing else.

Staff Member A: A gear? That’s quite reminiscent of a machine.

Toki: I’m not a machine. A person like Doctor wouldn’t get how I feel.

Staff Member A: How you feel…?

Toki: I want… to be with Ageha-san and Rui-san soon, and together we’ll reach the top… For that, I’ll do whatever it takes…!

-

(Door opens)

Staff Member A: Good morning. Do you know your own name?

Rui: Hinagi Rui.

Staff Member A: How about the name of the unit you’re from?

Rui: It’s Loulou*di.

Staff Member A: When you were asleep, did you experience any dreams?

Rui: Considering what you might regard as ‘dreams’, how should I answer?

Staff Member A: What’s the matter?

Rui: I’m asked about my dreams every time, and I’m beginning to think that I’ve been giving the wrong answers.

Staff Member A: I see. It seems like we’ve given off the wrong impression. This is simply standard as part of the examination, so you’ll be fine as long as you answer according to what you think is right.

Rui: Understood. But it seems like I’ve forgotten what dreams I had.

Staff Member A: Then, allow me to change the question.

Rui: Hm?

Staff Member A: Right now, what is the one thing you wish for the most?

Rui: Is that question also standard for the examination?

Staff Member A: That’s for us to handle.

Rui: My wish… is to maintain Loulou*di’s worldview and to reach the peak set by Ageha’s desires.

Staff Member A: Is that truly what you yourself want?

Rui: Why do you ask?

Staff Member A: What I’m asking for is not superficiality, but what’s from the bottom of your heart, your true wish, according to your instincts.

Rui: True…?

Staff Member A: Please think about how your feelings stand as they are now.

Rui: Are you thinking about something that might waver my instincts?

Staff Member A: I don’t know. To us, data is everything. (types in something) I’ll ask once again. What is the one thing you wish for the most, from the bottom of your heart?

-

(A clock chimes)

Ageha: …This is…?

(Door opens)

Staff Member A: Ah, you’re awake.

Ageha: The medical team…?

Staff Member A: Good morning. Are you able to state your own name?

Ageha: … It’s Karasuma Ageha.

Staff Member A: How about the name of the unit–

Ageha: Just why… am I here? I believe the schedule for routine examinations hasn’t been decided yet.

Staff Member A: It’s not out of the question during times of emergency. You were brought here after you collapsed in your dorm.

Ageha: !! I collapsed?

Staff Member A: We’ve prescribed some sleeping pills. Please take them after you return to your dorm.

Ageha: I’ll do without. Are you aware, Doctor, that those don’t even work as placebos?

Staff Member A: For the purpose of maintaining fairness, even the number of prescriptions for medications, be it of any type, are being monitored. You seem particularly more on edge than usual today.

Ageha: An accurate observation. It’d be more strange to not be on edge in this situation. Do you think of me as some emotionless, helpless mouse that’s playing along with your experiments?

Staff Member A: Not reigning in your agitation will affect your flower. We’ll also prepare to prescribe some medication for your mental state. Allow me to collect some data to determine whether that will be necessary.

Ageha: (sighs)

Staff Member A: I’ll carry on with the questions. When you were asleep, did you experience any dreams?

Ageha: No, not at all.

Staff Member A: A rough impression of it will suffice. Do you remember, even just a little?

Ageha: I would have told you if I did. I don’t have a reason to hide from you. My honest cooperation is pivotal to the success of the Hana*Doll Project. I understand that clearly.

Staff Member A: Then, my next question pertains to when you collapsed in the dorm. Do you remember what you were doing before you lost consciousness?

Ageha: … I was checking the music video for the new song.

Staff Member A: Why?

Ageha: Because I was thinking about the perfect performance for the music awards. Is that something so strange?

Staff Member A: No. Let’s move on.

Ageha: I, too, have a question for you, Doctor.

Staff Member A: What is it?

Ageha: When I was asleep, did you inject Water into me?

Staff Member A: That’s… Why do you ask?

Ageha: Did you or did you not? It’s a simple question. It’s a drug that stabilizes the influence on the flower, isn’t it? Haven’t you all been utilizing it like a convenience many times, this whole while?

Staff Member A: That’s…

Ageha: It’s injected into Anthos*. But is there a reason why it’s not injected into me?

Staff Member A: … Where did you hear that from?

Ageha: As I thought. That’s how it was.

Staff Member A: !! Don’t move. Your body is still–

Ageha: I couldn’t care less about what happens to them. I will do anything to become perfection itself, to be recognised by President Amagiri. Like a pupa that cannibalizes its own skin to become a beautiful butterfly, like Chihiro, turning into a form befitting of them–it’s what I will do. Then the President surely would acknowledge me, above anyone else. I’ll ask again. When I was unconscious, did you inject Water into me?

Staff Member A: Just why are you so fixated on the Water?

Ageha: It’s nothing like fixation. Please stop saying as though I want it.

Staff Member A: Then are you saying that you don’t need it?

Ageha: Perhaps I should answer that question of yours about dreams, Doctor. I only dreamt of one thing: surpassing order to reach the new heights of idols and scaling to its summit, becoming perfect. It would be possible for me, was what President Amagiri said.

Staff Member A: The existence you hope for aligns with our goals.

Ageha: But we’re not in agreement at all.

Staff Member A: Excuse me?

Ageha: The perfection you aim for is an imitation. Something born from a man-made invention put in a bottle. A defective monster who derides heaven. I will never become something like that. I won’t rely on drugs, but on my own strength, and become a new pioneer. Without fail.

Staff Member A: Please hold on–(something clatters) A-ah! What are you–?!

Ageha: Like I’d let myself be swallowed by some useless flower!

-

Staff Member B: Seems like you had a lot to deal with here.

Staff Member A: I apologize. I’ll clean this up in a bit.

Staff Member B: Did something happen with the Doll?

Staff Member A: Yes. When talking about Water his response is nothing short of deranged, but he takes his obsession with becoming the perfect Doll like it’s a normal thing for him.

Staff Member B: Humans will naturally obsess over things that are beyond their reach. That’s why we don’t give Water to that Doll. Like with plants, there are seeds that are harder to raise, and seeds that can be raised without hassle. The flowers and their hosts, too, have their own natures.

Staff Member A: Are you saying that even without Water, his flower can stabilize on its own?

Staff Member B: Not at all. Whether the Water is injected or not depends on the situation. There’s a high possibility that the flower will start to weaken if we inject more Water at this state.

Staff Member A: If I recall, administration of Water to Kisaragi Kaoru from Anthos* has also been stopped, right? But right now, his flower is stable and seems to be progressing towards full bloom.

Staff Member B: That’s a special case. I’m not sure of the details, but if there’s one thing I know, it’s that he’s completely different from the other Dolls.

Staff Member A: Different as in…?

Staff Member B: Since the seed was implanted in him, the method of blooming and the progress of growth for the flower have all been different. So, there’s not much to talk about if we want to draw comparisons.

Staff Member A: …But, even now, Karasuma Ageha’s condition has been making progress. Just now, and even before he was admitted, his memories are…

Staff Member B: It’s better if you keep your emotions out of your judgments. Beyond assisting in the growth of the Dolls, the slow-release effect of Water enables some quality of life. It might seem like a miracle pill at first glance, but the toll it takes on the Dolls is too much to bear.

Staff Member A: But what if we put stabilizing their condition as our forefront priority? Even if the toll gets raised, it would still be a favorable treatment to them, right? Maybe we could start administration for Anthos*.

Staff Member B: Ah, if you’re talking about the example Doll Shorai Chitose, that was Dr Toudou’s orders. The effect of his mental state on his flower turned out to be greater than expected. Taking into account the other Dolls’ conditions, administering Water seems to be the most optimal treatment.

Staff Member A: But even with a case like that, Karasuma Ageha might still refuse the Water. He might have realized something beyond what we predicted.

Staff Member B: Whether he’s realized something or not, his fate has already been sealed. He can chase those dreams all he wants, but without scientific clinical trials, he can’t escape reality. Well, we should get a move on with cleaning up. The next task is…

Staff Member A: Seems there’s been people talking about us returning Sakurai Toki to the House very soon. If we continue trying to keep things under wraps, it might become a problem for their idol activities and we’ll have to deal with a lot of heat. Besides…

Staff Member B: Besides?

Staff Member A: Even when he seemed entirely desensitized to emotion, he still desperately wanted to be with those two. If we return him to the House now, it would be like a repeat of that case with Anthos*.

Staff Member B: When with a flower that rejects Water, the success rate of the Water will be shared… Whatever action we decide to take next, we need to keep a close eye on the situation.

-

Ageha: I collapsed… and had to be carried over? What I was doing before? Dammit! I’m running out of time, I still have things I absolutely have to finish… 

(A notification comes in.)

Ageha: A message?

[midnightpillsnacking]

[Loulou*di S3V4 L 3-17] Hana-Doll 3rd Season THINK OF ME:DEJA VU Translation

Translation below the cut. Google Drive link | Listen to the album on Spotify

Rui: Toki-bou.

Toki: Ageha-san, Rui-san, good morning.

Ageha: Ah, good morning, Toki. Did you hear from the medical team?

Toki: Yes. The medical staff will be coming along just in case.But I think it’s a bit much, since we’re only gonna promote one song for the music program. … Rui-san, is there something on my face?

Rui: No, you look fine. Are you sure that you’ll be alright?

Toki: I’m in tip-top condition! I apologize for being an inconvenience while I was taking a break.

Ageha: Toki. When you return, give a performance befitting of Loulou*di. As long as you can do that, then there’s no inconvenience at all.

Toki: Ageha-san…! Yes, I will. I’ll give a perfect performance!

-

(Audience cheering.)

Host: Presenting the ones who gave us that outstanding performance, Loulou*di! Please give them all a warm welcome!

Ageha: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and to Loumiels.

Host: That was a flawless performance, backed with such incredible vocals and choreography. It was amazing!

Ageha: Thank you very much. It would be an honor for us to leave an impression on everyone’s hearts, even if it’s just for a short moment.

Host: The positions of the cameras to the compositions were all Loulou*di’s ideas, right?

Ageha: Yes. We worked closely with the staff to ensure that we would be able to effectively convey our appeal.

Host: After the replay, you’ll be announcing the track list, right? As well as your new music channel.

Ageha: We wish to bring our voices and performances to the many people who have been waiting for Loulou*di, and we also want to broaden the scope of our activities.

Toki: And as a new member, I would love to have more chances to show off my charm!

Host: So what you mean is that the new Loulou*di cherishes their fans and wants to continue to maintain the high quality for them?

Ageha: We are not ‘maintaining’ the quality. Our goal is somewhere higher, above the unshakeable heavens. Right now, we are still working towards it.

Host: This level is still a work-in-progress? If that’s the case, then your junior unit Anthos* has got their work cut out for them!

Ageha: !! Anthos*, you say?

Host: If they see their senior Loulou*di as a goal, then they would surely be able to reach their full potential, don’t you think? Not just with the Dream Jam Festa, but they would also be able to challenge themselves with various genres as they try to keep up. Ah, but with the new release rankings, Anthos* is more–

Ageha: The production of the performance earlier has been synced with many parts of the new music video that has just recently been released. We hope that with it, you would be able to experience Loulou*di’s worldview.

Host: Eh? A-ah, yes, you’re right! Could you share with us your intentions of doing so?

Ageha: Gladly. For example, right before the hook, that is, the lead-up to it, there is a part in question…

-

Toki: It’s been a while since I last worked with both of you, doing work for Loulou*di. It was super fun!

Rui: I see.

Toki: Ageha-san, Rui-san, did you see? The costars and the staff and the audience were all taken in by our performance. Their mouths were wide open the whole time! (giggles) Gaping just like fish!

Ageha: (sighs)

Toki: Huh? Ageha-san, the green room isn't that way.

Ageha: Head back first.

Rui: Ageha, where are you going?

Ageha: That’s none of your concern.

Rui: …

Ageha: Take Toki and return to the green room. Now.

Rui: Understood.

-

Ageha: (winces in pain) Shit… what a disappointment… just this much and already…

Rui: Ageha.

Ageha: Rui. You ended up coming with.

Rui: If anything, I didn’t feel like calling out to you.

Ageha: Damned mongrel that can’t even heed its owner’s orders. I told you… to take Toki back to the green room.

Rui: Toki-bou is in the green room. There’s no need to worry.

Ageha: ‘Worry’?

Rui: You don’t look well. You’re sweating a lot.

Ageha: Don’t touch me! Since the start, I believe I’ve been telling you… to stop concerning yourself over me…

Rui: I’m not concerned about you. I’m simply being realistic. (opens the interface on his ring)

Ageha: Hey, what do you think you’re doing?

Rui: I’m calling the medical staff over.

Ageha: What?

Rui: The staff that came with Toki-bou are in the green room. They will surely rush over if we contact them.

Ageha: Stop that! (groans in pain)

Rui: Ageha.

Ageha: … Quit doing things that are unnecessary.

Rui: Calm down. I’ll make you feel better soon–

Ageha: I told you not to touch me!

Rui: Breathe slowly. It will be more painful if you struggle.

Ageha: Shut up… Just leave me alone…!

Rui: …

Ageha: Hey!

Rui: I can’t undo your buttons if you keep moving. 

Ageha: (struggles)

Rui: Ageha.

Ageha: Do you have any idea… how humiliated I am to let you see me like this?!

Rui: Ageha. What do you wish for?

Ageha: What?

Rui: If you would let me, I will grant whatever wish you have. I’ve always watched you, so if it were up to me…

Ageha: Don’t fuck with me. That’s a horrible sick joke!

Rui: Ageha…

Ageha: I–urgh…

Rui: Earlier, you said that you were disappointed in yourself. You put your utmost faith in yourself and carry on despite being bogged by pain. Ageha, you cling so desperately onto life. And to be as such, you are more beautiful than anyone else in the world.

Ageha: Rui, let go of me…!

Rui: Save your pity. You’re putting more unnecessary strain on yourself.

Ageha: Stop talking nonsense! Like I’d ever want your help!

Rui: You won’t know when that will change. Trust me, and try to catch your breath. You’ll feel better soon.

Ageha: …

Rui: Even as Ageha suffers, he’s still a noble, unyielding man in my eyes. However, he’s ardent, and the driving force that keeps him going is… It’s not me. It’s always Yuuki Mahiro, Chihiro, or… President Amagiri. No matter if there’s no other that’s the most like Ageha like myself, no matter how much I understand him, no matter if I give myself to Loulou*di as fodder to scale to the top, I can’t become the reason for Ageha’s will. It’s not me. Not now, not ever. Just what am I… thinking about now?

-

Ageha: Rui… hey, Rui!

Rui: … Ageha.

Ageha: What are you spacing out for? That’s enough. Let go of me.

Rui: But you’re still–

Ageha: Try adding displeasure and discomfort and see what you get!

Rui: Your resolve doesn’t waver even as you tremble.

Ageha: What did you say…?

Rui: No, it’s nothing.

Ageha: … Let’s get moving. We can’t leave Toki alone.

-

Ageha: Seems like the green room is plenty lively.

Rui: The medical staff… What are they doing?

Staff Member A: Ah, you two. Thank you for your hard work today.

Ageha: Is Toki asleep? It looks like he’s not conscious.

Staff Member A: It’s been some time since he’s been at work. All the medical staff are planning an examination for him.

Rui: Toki-bou said that he felt that his condition was perfect.

Staff Member A: There’s nothing to worry about. He’d probably return to the dorm in two to three days. You there, quickly take Sakurai Toki to the car.

(The staff members carry Toki out of the room.)

Staff Member A: With that, we’ll excuse ourselves. Once both of you are ready, please return to the dorm. We’ll prepare for a car to pick you up at the exit.

Rui: Understood.

Ageha: Doctor, I believe I’ve said this before. If you do something to Toki, to Loulou*di… you understand what will happen, right?

Staff Member A: …

Ageha: Please… take good care of Toki.

-

Rui: Ageha. Is there something on your mind?

Ageha: Rui. Not a word from you.

Rui: But–

Ageha: I said keep your trap shut. It’s annoying.

Rui: Alright. I won’t say anything until we reach the dorm. I don’t wish to agitate you.

Ageha: We’re not going back to the dorm yet.

Rui: Where are we headed to?

Ageha: To somewhere where I have something I must do. (enters something in the interface)

Rui: Amagiri Production?

Ageha: That’s right. We’re headed to where he is.

[midnightpillsnacking]

[Loulou*di S3V4 L 3-19] Hana-Doll 3rd Season THINK OF ME:DEJA VU Translation

Translation below the cut. Google Drive link | Listen to the album on Spotify

Rui: (sighs) My… true wish?

(Rui suddenly winces in pain.)

Ryoga: (runs over) Hey, you okay?

Rui: You’re… Kagekawa Ryoga from Anthos*.

Ryoga: Looks like we meet again, Rui. But that aside, is there something wrong with your chest?

Rui: Why do you ask?

Ryoga: What do you mean ‘why’? You’re clutching it like it hurts and you’re shaking like a leaf. Maybe you should go get checked by the medical–

Rui: That won’t be necessary.

Ryoga: Really? Well, if you insist, then I won’t force you. By yourself today?

Rui: Ageha is upstairs.

Ryoga: Ah, with President Amagiri? Speaking of which, last time Ageha went to see the president by himself too. Are you always staying behind to watch the house?

Rui: Watching the house…?

Ryoga: !! My bad, that was a joke.

Rui: It’s nothing. I was just thinking about things.

Ryoga: Thinking about things, huh?

Rui: Hm?

Ryoga: Rui, is it okay if we chat for a bit?

Rui: If it’s until Ageha returns.

Ryoga: You really do cherish Ageha-san, don’t you? I’m the same, too. I’ll do whatever it takes to protect what I cherish. That’s why, lately all I’ve been thinking of is stupid things. Thanks to a bunch of people, Anthos* is now on the fast track, and we’re getting lots of jobs here and there. We’ve managed to put ourselves out there and be seen, and things look like they’ll go swimmingly at this rate… is what I thought, anyway.

Rui: Is that not how it is?

Ryoga: The change in environment is so drastic, it’s like my blood can’t catch up with my limbs. It’s a weird, uneasy feeling, but it seems like Loulou*di  have already crossed that bridge. It made me think that you guys really are amazing seniors.

Rui: Is that so?

Ryoga: (laughs) What a typical response. I’m not saying those things because of being polite.

Rui: Then, what do you mean?

Ryoga: I mean that there are definitely more guys out there who couldn’t keep up and just threw in the towel than I thought. Anthos* has got to keep aiming forward so we don’t end up like that. That’s why… I was thinking that it’d be nice if I could get a little advice from a senior.

Rui: Advice?

Ryoga: A little while back, Setsuna said he got some advice from Ageha-san.

Rui: Yashiro Setsuna?

Ryoga: He wouldn’t tell me everything. ‘The enemy is not always lying in wait outside’--that’s what Setsuna said Ageha-san told him. Rui, do you know what that means?

Rui: The advice came from Ageha. I wouldn’t know the details.

Ryoga: Really?

Rui: Do you think I’m lying?

Ryoga: Not taking you for a liar, but you’re always close to Ageha, so I thought you might have some idea.

Rui: Did you think that simply by being by his side, I would be able to read his mind? Are you able to understand every one of Yuuki Mahiro’s thoughts?

Ryoga: … Ah, sorry. What I said was wrong.

Rui: It’s alright. I understand that what you said carelessly wasn’t something so flippant. There was a meaning to your words.

Ryoga: …Eh? H-hey, what do you mean that…?

Rui: A few words will become your will and turn into an action of impulse…

Ryoga: Rui? Sorry, did you catch what I said?

Rui: I don’t know Ageha’s true intentions of telling Yashiro Setsuna what he said. As for myself, I don’t think I can think of a piece of advice to give you.

Ryoga: O-oh…

Rui: Kagekawa Ryoga, do you have something you wish for?

Ryoga: …W-wish?

Rui: I don’t know myself. As Ageha said before, what exactly frightens you?

Ryoga: !! What are you–

Rui: This has nothing to do with me. This is about what’s on the other side of the wall that separates us, what’s beyond the boundary line between. But there are things that I am aware of. In this world, there exists things that are contradictory.

Ryoga: Contradictory?

Rui: The change you speak of is something framed by your own interpretation, but it’s not something that captures the truth.

Ryoga: What do you mean…?

Rui: Just like how the things are lost in translation, or how your interpretation of god changes depending on your belief, you can spend your whole life side by side, but you will still never become one and the same. Not as one existence.

Ryoga: Hold on, what are we talking about now?

Rui: The flower is delicate.

Ryoga: By flower, you mean… the ones inside us?

Rui: Kagekawa Ryoga. If you’re not prepared to rot together with Yuuki Mahiro, then wash your hands clean while you still can. The influence of the flower inside you is starting to show. Before that happens…

Ryoga: …Why? Why do you speak Hiro’s name? Hey, Rui. Did you do something to him?!

Rui: !!

Ryoga: S-sorry.

Rui: I’m not aware of anything. Just forget what I said.

Ryoga: Could it be that… you’re worried about me?

Rui: Sympathy…?

Ryoga: You said something?

Rui: No, it’s nothing. Let’s meet again at the music awards, in our best form. That is what Ageha hopes for. Which is why I decided to talk to you.

Ryoga: That wasn’t a warning to me?

Rui: Everything is for Ageha’s sake.

Ryoga: Rui, why do you hold onto Ageha-san that much?

Rui: Hold onto?

Ryoga: I believe that Ageha-san is someone amazing. But to you, his existence is so much more than that, isn’t it?

Rui: I…

(Both Rui and Ryoga receive notifications)

Rui: It seems we are being called.

Ryoga: Yeah. Looks like I’ve got to answer. I think we’ve got to call it here today.

Rui: So it seems.

Ryoga: I’m glad I got to talk to you. Then, until we meet again.

Rui: Likewise.

Ryoga: Rui. About our conversation… Whatever comes our way, I don’t intend to let go of Hiro’s hand. So that we’ll never lose each other ever again. That day, we made a promise to search for the truth together. Talking with you made me remember something important. Thanks for helping me make up my mind on my resolve.

(Ryoga leaves.)

Rui: I, too… if I have emotions for him, for Ageha… To let a man break and scatter while staying ignorant would be regrettable.

[midnightpillsnacking]

[Loulou*di S3V4 L 3-18] Hana-Doll 3rd Season THINK OF ME:DEJA VU Translation

Translation below the cut. Google Drive link | Listen to the album on Spotify

(Staff member shouting.

Staff Member: Hold it right there! You cannot meet the president without an appointment! If you have matters to discuss, please come this way.

Ageha: Please get out of the way. There’s no point if it’s not with the president himself. Excuse me.)

Amagiri: Coming in without knocking is quite a disruption.

Staff Member: I apologize, President. I’ll escort him out as soon as possible.

Ageha: President Amagiri. Do you intend to send me away?

Amagiri: No, I’d never dream of it. Besides, I have something to discuss with you. It all works out. You may leave us.

Staff Member: U-Understood. Please excuse me.

(The staff member exits the room.)

Amagiri: Now then, did you come here by yourself?

Ageha: If you’re talking about Rui, I left him behind in the car. I don’t need him around to talk to you. Unless, you are dissatisfied with me?

Amagiri: You seem quite antsy today, Ageha.

Ageha: … Why?

Amagiri: ‘Why’ as in?

Ageha: Why did Loulou*di have to turn up on such a vulgar program? Please explain yourself.

Amagiri: You came all the way just to ask me that?

Ageha: That’s not a program at Loulou*di’s level.

Amagiri: Is that what you think?

Ageha: Yes. There’s no way that you wouldn’t have a clue on what suits Loulou*di the best. You’ve said it yourself. The one who belongs on the pedestal Chihiro built, the one who can pursue your ideal is none other than me, than Loulou*di. Then, why–

Amagiri: Ageha.

Ageha: !!

Amagiri: Why would you, then, be so rash?

Ageha: ‘Rash’...? A-ah… is this about the music channel?

Amagiri: It seems it was launched without my knowledge. Did you not think that I would take this as someone like you trying to bite off more than they can chew, without heeding authority?

Ageha: That’s…!

Amagiri: If you have a good reason, I’d like to hear it.

Ageha: That’s… because you’re too soft on that good-for-nothing. The opportunity offered to something that should have been long thrown away, should have gone to Loulou*di instead!

Amagiri: So you don’t have a good reason.

Ageha: I saw it fit for us to take the initiative. With the channel, even you would be able to truly perceive Loulou*di’s strength!

Amagiri: So you wanted to prove your strength by acting on your own.

Ageha: Don’t tell me you’re unhappy just because of this? Is that why you sent Loulou*di to appear on that program? As a punishment… to me?

Amagiri: A punishment. Is that how you see it?

Ageha: If I’m wrong, tell it to me straight. Say your thoughts out loud.

Amagiri: No, I’m just becoming aware of how you think of this, Ageha. Or perhaps you’re one of those obtuse humans who demand an explanation for every single little thing?

Ageha: Obtuse…? That word should be used on them. Those things are lightyears away from perfect, and yet why…?! President, are you purposefully turning a blind eye? I’m much more, I’ve always–

Amagiri: Ageha. I understand how you feel.

Ageha: You understand…? But, you–You still keep that good-for-nothing, Yuuki Mahiro, in your eyes! I’m here, so why do you…? Didn’t you say that you can label him a good-for-nothing, but you have nothing to erase the blood tying you to him?!

Amagiri: The one who turned a blind eye away since then wasn’t me, but you.

Ageha: Huh…?

Amagiri: I did warn you before to stay out of the affairs of Anthos*, didn’t I? I mentioned that they were pebbles on a pavement placed to make you stand out. Or did you forget about that?

Ageha: There’s no way that I would forget what you said. Every single word from you has no substitution for me.

Amagiri: Then you’re saying that you didn’t forget my warning, but willfully disobeyed it?

Ageha: Please stop saying it like that. President, I’m not the sort of person who would go against–

Amagiri: Ageha. With that incident, it seemed like you had the chance to have a little chat with Yashiro Setsuna.

Ageha: Yashiro… Setsuna? Did he… say anything to you?

Amagiri: Well, I’ll let it go this time, since I managed to gather some good data. For that, I’ll express my gratitude to you.

Ageha: Good data? From Yashiro Setsuna? I didn’t think that he could gather data that could satisfy you. He’s always been gloomy since we were still training, I could never tell what goes on in his mind.

Amagiri: I’m familiar with him. And placing him in Anthos* was my decision. The kind of person he was, the extent of his capabilities, they were all put into consideration when I made my choice.

Ageha: How would I know that he was up to your standards? It’s true that he was ranked as SS class, but he was always on his own, out of sight, just like air. I can’t think of something that he has that I don’t.

Amagiri: A harsh evaluation.

Ageha: By right, he shouldn’t even have debuted. There’s not an atom in his body that has the talent to stand in front of an audience. But after he was implanted with the seed, he took on the appearance of a ghost. Without that, I don’t think you would have chosen him at all.

Amagiri: You said it well. Before, both of you were the same, outstanding idols who swore to break boundaries of human knowledge and reach the perfect world, and pivotal pieces to help me achieve my goal.

Ageha: He’s that important of a piece… and you handed him over to Anthos*? No, that doesn’t make any sense. I can’t imagine that you would call Yuuki Mahiro useless and then give him such an advantage!

Amagiri: It appears that regardless of what I say, you would still think that I’m giving that thing special treatment.

Ageha: If I’m wrong, then just look at me.

(Ageha gets down)

Ageha: President Amagiri, I beg of you. Please accept me. I’ll become the form that you and Chihiro desire. I promise you! Not as an imitation, but as the real thing, a perfect existence! That was what I promised you, on that very day. That’s why… All of this means nothing if you can’t truly accept me.

Amagiri: So you’re kneeling and pleading for me. It seems like you too are another human born with sin.

Ageha: President…?

Amagiri: Ageha, listen carefully. Humans are living creatures that are born burdened with sin. We are unlike other living things who simply repeat the same instinctual motions like clockwork. We can think and we can birth a myriad of emotions. That is the sin that we humans are born with. And within that, there is still an emotion that is steeped deeply in sin. Do you know what that is?

Ageha: !!

Amagiri: It’s love. To love is to despair, Ageha.

Ageha: Love is… a sin?

Amagiri: A perfect existence is one without sin. Ageha, do you think that you can embody that?

Ageha: I don’t possess… an emotion like that.

Amagiri: Oh?

Ageha: I don’t need… that aggravating emotion. I only have… hatred.

Amagiri: Do you hate me, Ageha?

Ageha: It’s not towards you. The one I hate… You… Only for you, I would surpass human knowledge and aim for the perfect world… You needed me… you saved me… that’s why… I would… follow you…

Amagiri: You don’t seem to be well. Leave and go to the medical tower.

Ageha: President! I still–

Amagiri: I will notify the medical team. I should let Rui know as well.

Ageha: No, you don’t have to. I’ll be fine on my own.

Amagiri: Then, I look forward to your upcoming activities, Ageha.

(Ageha leaves the room.)

Amagiri: There’s a fine line between hatred and love…

(Someone knocks on the door.)

Amagiri: Come in.

Staff Member: Please excuse me. President, we have made arrangements for Karasuma Ageha’s purging.

Amagiri: Is that so?

Staff Member: I deeply apologize for letting him barge into your office.

Amagiri: Just make sure that there isn’t a next time.

Staff Member: Understood.

Amagiri: But, I should be thanking you. Let’s consider this a small victory.

Staff Member: The medical team has been informed of the case from the other day. Would you like to take a look at the archive?

Amagiri: There’s no need for that. Once everything is over, just clean it up nice and thoroughly.

Staff Member: Heard loud and clear. I’ll take my leave now.

(Staff member leaves.)

Amagiri: Ageha, you’ve done well. With all my thanks, I shall prepare the greatest stage, just for you.