#this album rewired my brain i swear | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

icyfox17 · 2 months

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3, 4, 9, 11, 15, 20, and 21 :D!!

3. three songs you were recently obsessed with -fucked up by racoma -car lights by james marriott -iris by goo goo dolls

OUGHOGUHGOGHOGHOGUHOGUHOGGHOUGHOGUH i have been looping these three SO MUCH LATELY along with allez les blues by los camps

fucked up jumpscares me bc theres swearing in the literal title and it sounds so intense and i mean the bridge aka my fav part of the song IS intense bUT ITS SOOOO GOOD AND SOSOSOO PRETTY AND I CANNOTTT GET OVERRR IT RAHHSHSHDFJSDK

car lights is a funny one bc the first like 3 years of me listening to james' music i never got into it for some reason?? i always loved grapes and gold n stuff but then tommy covered it during his karaoke stream and HOLYSHITT i was like wtf this is so good? and then i listened to the original and went HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO GOOD??? its now been like 2-3 months and i still. am looping this shit constantly like BRO BR O BRO BRO BRO BRO ITS SO GOODDFDOWEJFIAWFEJAWFELJAWEFIJWEFLWE I LOVE CAR LIGHTS SO MUCHHHHHHHHHHHHH

iris is one of my long time fav songssss, i grew up on 90s alt rock so anything from that era is just soo <333 fkjdsdjflsj EPXLODES !!! but like the last two years ive gone in and out with listening to it. i'll listen to 90s for like a month and then go back to modern music. but yeah january i started megaaaa listening to 90s alt rock again and i remembered how much i love iris so that shit has been on loop as well. it is genuinely one of my top five fav songs of all time. also extra fun fact for you !! my mom used to loop it while she was pregnant with me <3 so it is just kinda like. my song lmao ever since before i was born lmaooooo

okay gonna provide a cut bc this will be a long one ^-^

4 i already answered and i would answer w diff ones but this ones gonna be long so i'll skip it for now eheh

9. three songs that get you in the Christmas Mood -Auld Lang Syne by Andrew Bird -Carol of the Bells from the Home Alone soundtrackkk -Rocking Around the Christmas Tree by Brenda Lee

the first album is such a lovely one grgrgrkjrjgk i have nice memories of listening to it while sitting in front of the (real wood !!) fireplace and drinking tea and just enjoying my family's company during xmas time <333

i just fucking love carol of the bells so much i have like five billion diff versions of it saved ONE OF MY FAVS BEING A MANDALORIAN THEME SONG CROSSED WITH IT ITS LITERALLY THE BEST THING EVER CREATED IN EXISTENCE LIKEEEE MY TWO FAV SONGS EVER BEING COMBINED??? YES PLEASEKEKGHRGJKHRKJ

and the last one is just a classic:D also reminds me of home alone which is ofc my fav xmas movie ever (way better than elf FIGHT MEEE)

11. three favourite songs from movie or TV series soundtrack (i think this means like soundtrack so regular songs rather than ost but if u wanna know my three fav ostsss pls send and i will tell !!! i love film osts so much omg 😭😭😭) -Heroes by David Bowie [Perks of Being A Wallflower] -Lake Shore Drive by Aliotta Haynes Jeremiah [Guardians of the Galaxy] -Spirits by The Strumbellas [Middle School Worst Years of My Life]

goddd this movie changed my life honestly and the scene this song is from genuinely is just. it rewired my brain chemistry. i want to feel infinite man its soooooo i love this movie sosososooso much and this song is just so lovely and just RAHSHSFJDKSKJFKLAKJS i cannot english properly lmao i think im losing steam but just. yes. this song + movie are both. yes

I LOVE GOTG SOUNDTRACK SO MUCH IT IS PEAK EVERY SONG IS FUCKING AMAZINGGGGG but this is one of the songs that i found from this movie and idk !! i think it's underrated it's so vibey it makes me feel so happy:))))

this is another movie that literally changed my life. like. it's such a silly movie? but it genuinely makes me cry everytime and and this songggg this is the beginning of me looking into my own taste of music that's not just generic top 60 from the radio or my family's taste. i found this song from this movie and found the rest of the band's music and and and it was one of the first steps of me finding out who i am. it's a really big part of my personality (both the movie and the song) and i just :(( this band makes me sooo emotional. they helped me out during my first bout of mental health issues and i just got to see them in concert a couple months ago and sobsobsobsosbsobosbsobsososbsobsobsossbososssssssss SORRY i'll start rambling now i just GODDD the strumbellas mean so much to me :(

15. three songs you want to dance with your love to -Come on Eileen by Dexy Midnight Runners -Coming Home by Leon Bridges -Starting Over by Chris Stapleton

the first two are just CLASSICSSSS you have to dance to themmm and i have in the past and its literally the greatest feeling in the world. literally nothing compares. the last one is more targeted towards my partner:))) she's from tennesse LMAOO and loves country music buuuuttt besides that i also just like. my dad and his wife listen to country music a lot and it's soooo?? it's so lovely idk this style of country music is just pure vibes. but yeah the lyrics r also super lovely and just remind me of my partner so badly grjgkjrgkjrg i need to listen to alllll the country and soul (heh pun unintended) music with them. this song in particular is so comforting i just feel like it'd be nice to dance in the kitchen to <3

20. three songs that remind you of the person who sends this one -Morning Rain by Adam Torres -Banana Pancakes by Jack Johnson -Home Is by Kanaya

you just give me very soft pretty rainy day vibes <333 ur a very kind person and you hold so much positivity. these songs are all so very comforting and i just !! think they suit u very well ^-^

21. three songs of your childhood -Upside Down by Jack Johnson -Could You Be Loved by Bob Marley -Clocks by Coldplay

goddddd this songgg this song is nostalgia in a nutshell. used to love the movie but also my mom and i used to dogsit for this one person and they had 3 cds. jack johnson, barenaked ladies, and adele. i used to play those and just run around the house acting out the songs. so all of those are very nostalgic but upside down takes the cake bc it just. sounds nostalgic. idk its such happy vibes and its so innocent and wholesome and i justtttt sobsss its so lovely

my half-siblings' dad had a record player before it was cool and the two records he used to play all the time were bob marley and michael jackson. bob marley reminds me more of my childhood though. its just !! its bob marley man. certified classic and good vibes. i love this song so much <3 i love all of his music a lot but this one just ??? makes me feel super intense emotions

this one is NOSTALGIA KING i dont know if there's any other song that sounds like nostalgia like this one does. it was always on the radio in the car and its also in several movies and just aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa its so gorgeous i love this song so much <3333

#foxieasks #grace tag #ask games #song ask game #OOOHHH GRACIE TYSM THESE WERE SUCH GOOD ONES TO ANSWER WOOO #WOWEIE that took a long time lmao #i am so sleepy #that was fun though #<333 #love u gracie !!

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cantspelldragoonwithoutgoon · 5 months

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9 people you’d like to get to know better

got tagged by the lovely @arinaxiv thank youuuuuu (づ˶•༝•˶)づ♡

Three Ships:

Maedhros/Fingon (Silmarillion etc) (The Most Ship. the whole drama, oh Eru. Unnumbered Tears indeed.)

Tennou Haruka/Kaiou Michiru (Sailor Moon) (ethereal. perfect. actually in a healthy relationship. also that scene towards the end of the battle against Galaxia, where everyone dies (for the n-th time) and they use their last bits of strength to reach for each other's hands broke me)

Aranea Highwind/Ignis Scientia (FFXV) (they don't even have much shared dialogue in the game iirc but the bits they do have completely rewired my brain. they compliment each other's character so well. i just think they're neat.)

First Ever Ship: huge supporter of Kunzite/Zoisite in Sailor Moon since age 6 (and unknowing fujoshi, thanks german synchro, i owe you so much)

Last Song: On the Dark Waters by Amorphis (i listen to music almost all the time, this is just what was playing as i typed this. it’s also really good tho. the entire album is really good imho, i basically have it on repeat atm.)

Currently Reading: i have that sickness where i read multiple books at once. the one in my hand bag, meaning most actively being read, is The London Séance Society by Sarah Penner. (victorian ladies solving murders by asking ghosts who killed them how awesome is that)

Currently Watching: just finished Moriarty the Patriot. (Apparently the only way to make Sherlock Holmes palatable to me is transforming it into a bishounen anime and make Moriarty a murderous socialist and also the protagonist)

Currently Consuming: ungodly amounts of baked goods (sadly not in this moment but in general) and yarn (i’m not eating the yarn i swear. must. make. sock.)

Currently Craving: freetime to make things (i need more socks. my feet are cold.... so cold…. also let's not talk about the fabric stash)

~･*♡੭ੇ৸♡੭ੇ৸♡*･~

Honestly don't know who to tag, i'm feeling very self conscious about poking people at the moment, esp about personal stuffs 🙊

If you see this sliding across your dash and love filling questionnaires feel free though <3

#tag you're it

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sending-the-message · 6 years

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White Noise by Sergeant_Darwin

I’ve never been much of a man. I barely crack 5’6”, can’t handle my liquor, and I’ve never been in a fight in my life—but when Lainie got pregnant, I decided it was time for a change. I started working out. I learned how to change the oil and tires on the Buick. Hell, I even bought a pistol. I was going to protect them, Lainie and my unborn child both, whatever it took.

I could tell Lainie thought it was all a little silly, my newfound quest for manhood. It was easy for her to say. She was doing her part. Carrying the burden of life inside her, while all I could do was hold her hair, in the early stages of pregnancy, as she puked into the toilet—and sometimes I even fucked that up. She seemed to think she could do it all herself, and she was probably right. When I brought home the gun, she was livid. All we needed, she said, was a baseball bat. And someone strong enough to swing it, she might have added.

I took it back the next day and bought a Louisville Slugger instead.

The baby came without a hitch—little Annika, looking just like her mommy—and what we lacked in protection, Lainie made up for with near-neurotic preparation. She had it all; the books, the vitamins, the breastfeeding techniques. But perhaps her favorite new mom-toy came in the form of a Kiddos Baby Monitor that she got at the baby shower. I can’t remember who gave it to her.

It gave off a small hum, scarcely a whisper, every single night. Vague static; white noise—interrupted, only on occasion, by a cough or hiccup or whimper from sweet Annika. She wasn’t a fussy baby at all. The monitor rested on Lainie’s nightstand, securing my wife like a second quilt. A small red dot, indicating the device was alive and well, dimly bathed the room in crimson, and an optional display provided a blue-tinted camera feed aimed at Annika’s crib. We could hear her, we could see her, and all was well in paradise.

Oh, there were tough times, sure. The jaundice was bad and it led to things even worse. Pneumonia. Strep. Infections no fun for an adult but an enormous goddamn deal for a baby. We spent plenty of time in the hospital. The nurses all loved Annika. They always remarked on what a well-behaved baby she was.

The marriage grew stale, but what marriage doesn’t? The sex was rare and forced, just another thing for Lainie to check off her to-do list. Was it ever really not that way, though? I tried to remember, but life before Annika seemed trapped in a cloudless haze. Becoming a father seemed to alter the very structure of my brain.

The first year came and went. The Kiddos Baby Monitor ran out of batteries, and we never bothered to replace them. Annika was crawling. Then walking. The first word, spoken at the dinner table, which Lainie and I were both there for: Mango.

The words kept coming. Mommy. Diaper. Full. They were all expected, yet all met with excited applause from her mother and me. And then, one day, while Lainie was at spinning class and I was doing the newspaper crossword on the couch, Annika piped up from her playpen with a word I did not expect.

Fa-ther.

I sat up, straining silently to listen, sure I had misheard. But then it came again, even clearer than before.

Fa-ther.

Most dads would be thrilled. I was confused, and frankly, a bit unnerved. I had no idea where she’d learned that. I was always ‘daddy.’ In fact, as far as I’d seen, nobody had ever so much as breathed that word in front of her. Yet there she sat, squawking away, giving voice to a word uncomfortably formal as though it were the most natural thing in the world.

Father. Father. Father.

Lainie didn’t seem as interested as I did. In fact, she seemed more than a little bit miffed—Annika had been growing more distant from her lately. This was the age children usually clung tightest to their mothers, yet Annika seemed to have no such proclivity. One doctor theorized that Annika might be having her needs met through another source—did she have a stuffed animal she was particularly attached to? A blanket, maybe? We could think of nothing.

We had her tested for autism. Hell, we had her tested for everything. Nothing could explain her level of detachment from us, nor her remarkably tame behavior. The professionals had never seen anything like it, but didn’t seem to think it much cause for concern.

“Count your blessings, friend,” one of them told me in a heavy English accent as he escorted me from his office. “Between you and me, nine out of ten kids her age is a right little shit.”

Still, we couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. One night, Lainie had decided she’d had enough. She dug the old Kiddos Baby Monitor out of a box in the attic. She put new batteries in it, rewired the camera in Annika’s room, and for a few hours, the white noise hummed beneath our sleep once more.

I awoke to the sound of Annika babbling away in her crib. I turned toward the monitor, and my eyes swam, barely open, in the sea of crimson from its light. She was repeating the same word, again and again.

Fa-ther. Fa-ther.

I rolled over toward Lainie. She was still asleep—Annika wasn’t being very loud. I stumbled out of bed, wiping my eyes, and picked up the monitor. My fingers fumbled for the switch on the back, and when I flicked it, a dull blue glow sprang from nowhere. I squinted my eyes to see into Annika’s crib, and I let out a strangled cry. The monitor slipped from my hands and crashed to the floor. Lainie woke with a start, mumbling.

“Whatsamatter?”

But I couldn’t speak.

Someone was holding my daughter.

Without a word, I ran into the hallway, not even bothering to grab the Louisville Slugger from the closet. The door to Annika’s room was open. My socks slid out from under me and I crashed to the wooden hallway floor as I reached it, and as I lie prone I had a clear view into the bedroom.

Annika sat up in her crib, crying wildly for a change, startled by the noise. Nobody was holding her.

“I swear to God, honey—”

But Lainie wasn’t having it.

“The first night we start using the monitor again, and it just happens to be the night an invisible man breaks into our house? And leaves her placed all neat in her crib where he found her?”

“He wasn’t invisible, and I can’t explain it, Lainie, I’m telling you what I saw.”

“Alright,” she said, as though humoring a child. “What did he look like?”

At this, I drew blank. I couldn’t exactly describe him—I hadn’t looked long enough. I felt that I had seen him before, though. Somewhere. I felt that seeing him at all, even in a completely non-threatening context, would have made me deeply uncomfortable. But I didn’t know how to explain this to Lainie, this vague recognition. So I just shrugged. She scoffed.

“Jesus. What am I supposed to do with this.”

But the whole thing had her spooked, I know it. That night she told me—if you hear anything from the monitor, anything at all, you wake me up right away. So I did.

Father. Father. Lainie’s voice rang out above the dead white noise.

Lainie snatched the cooing monitor from her bedside table less than a second after I’d woken her. She sat up and flicked the switch.

Lainie shrieked a horrible sobbing shriek. She flung the covers from her and leapt from the bed in one fluid motion, leaving the monitor face-up on the sheet behind her. On it I could see the man, cradling Annika with a light bounce, more clearly this time. And in a flash I knew exactly who he was. And this time, I stayed right where I lay.

It took Lainie a long time to calm Annika down—that scream had put a good scare into her. I don’t think Lainie even noticed that I never came in. By the time she got back to our bedroom, the lights were on and I sat on the bed, spread out with a couple of her old college photo albums.

She walked into the room and stopped in her tracks. She looked at me, at the albums, and back to me. I think in that moment we both knew it was over.

“He wasn’t in there,” she said after a long pause. “I know what you’re thinking, but it wasn’t him. Nobody was in there.”

“Fine,” I said. “But he was on the monitor. You know he was on the monitor. Why, Lainie?”

She looked down at the albums, at the old pictures from which Will Harding’s dumb fucking face grinned up at both of us, feigning innocence.

“Father...”

She looked at me, and the guilt shone in her eyes.

“Will’s the father. Not me. Will Harding.”

She started to cry. I stood up and walked out of the room, pausing a few inches from her face to say, softly, almost sweetly:

“You’re a real bitch, you know that?”

Then I left the house and never walked back inside. Lainie brought all my stuff to my new apartment a couple days later. The divorce went through quickly; she didn’t want it but she understood. She, of course, got custody of Annika, having the tremendous advantage of not only womanhood but of actually being Annika’s biological parent. I didn’t fight it. It’s amazing how quickly I stopped loving both of them.

Will Harding was a big, brash man. He had tattoos, muscles, and watched football and drank beer and got mean when he did. That’s why Lainie left him, after two passionate, terrible years. She once told me she married me because I was everything Will was not. But it wasn’t long before she realized that by the same token, Will was everything I was not. I guess old habits die hard. And three months after Annika was born, so did Will. He found out that Lainie had had a baby and came to the house. She shut him out, screaming at him that he wasn’t the father, he wasn’t, he wasn’t. But he knew—she was lying. So he got real drunk and real mad and didn’t put on his seatbelt and on his way back to our place he sped his fucking Camaro up a curb and into a big brick mailbox.

Lainie went to his fucking funeral. She told me she was getting her teeth cleaned.

She sent me a Christmas card last year—she and Annika, smiling underneath a hearth in cheesy red sweaters, stockings hung on either side of them. I looked at the little girl I used to call mine, now seven years old, and felt nothing. I wondered absently if I should feel guilty, and if I’d somehow failed as a dad. But those thoughts, often though they came, never lasted long. She didn’t need another father—she already had one, after all, and she seemed to like him just fine.

#reddit #nosleep #scary #story

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