#this is the first fic i’ve completed in 8 years i hope y’all are proud of me lmao

[gemssum]

oh, to be alone with you

Fandom: Fire Emblem Three Houses

Pairing: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd x Isabelle Flores / Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd x OC / Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd x Reader

Rating: General Audiences — Fluff, Mild Hurt/Comfort

Isabelle and Dimitri finally have a calm moment alone within the chaos of the war.

Note: Though this is set up as a Canon x OC fic, there are no physical descriptions, so this could also pass as a Canon x Reader fic. Feel free to use a Chrome/Firefox extension like InteractiveFics to change “Isabelle” and the she/her pronouns to those of your choosing.

ao3 link

Isabelle hummed quietly as she rifled through her collection of tinctures, trying to find the exact ones she needed. Almost two weeks ago, Dimitri had been injured in a skirmish against Imperial troops. The wound wasn’t life-threatening, but still required cautious care and numerous stitches. Today, Dimitri asked her to remove them—though really any of the healers at the monastery could complete the task just as well.

Isabelle, of course, accepted. She enjoyed the calm routine that medical work brought and, in this case, the quiet intimacy it offered with Dimitri.

The importance of their war duties meant that they could hardly have a spare moment for themselves, let alone each other. The war had spread them both thin, the ever-present strategy meetings and wounded soldiers in need of care caused them to seek one another out in the small pockets of time they could manage. For the past moon they had just enough time for short conversations during mealtimes and fleeting kisses in empty monastery corridors. It was tiring, and they were both thankful for this moment of reprieve.

While she continued her search, Dimitri was patiently waiting on the edge of Isabelle’s bed, taking in the scenery of her small room. He had visited her quarters a handful of times prior to this, but none of the encounters had ever lasted for very long. As a result, he still wasn’t used to how much of her was present in the small space.

Dimitri’s eye wandered to the various herbs growing on the windowsill and drying on the walls, their presence making a pleasant floral scent flow throughout the room. The fragrance always stuck to Isabelle’s clothing and never failed to calm Dimitri whenever he came across it.

Slightly smiling to himself at the thought, his attention shifted to the plethora of medical and magical equipment she kept. Her mildly disorganized shelves were full of various potions and balms meant to cure almost any ailment imaginable. The sheer number of them was almost puzzling.

Does she really have the time to use all of them?

“Ah! Found it,” Isabelle’s soft exclamation broke Dimitri out of his roaming thoughts. His gaze followed her as she made her way over to him, arms full of supplies.

She set her collection on the nightstand and moved to stand between Dimitri’s legs, “Alright, let's take these off.”

Her hands reached for his shoulders and made quick work of removing Dimitri’s large cloak, letting it fall in a pool behind him. He followed her lead, his fingers working to undo the clasps attached to his gauntlets.

Despite his attempts to conceal the movement, his hands were slightly shaky as he attempted to loosen the buckles. He wasn’t yet accustomed to having someone so close and regarding him so gently, least of all Isabelle. Even after the time they’d shared since confessing, he was still a mess when it came to her.

He figured he always would be.

The pair continued to move in tandem to finish removing Dimitri’s armor. The small clinks of metal-on-metal as each piece hit the floor were the only sounds that filled the otherwise quiet room.

When the final piece of armor was shed, Isabelle broke the silence between them with slight hesitation in her voice, “Now... your sweater.” Before Dimitri could respond, she quickly busied herself with organizing and sanitizing her tools, trying to give him a semblance of privacy.

Isabelle’s suddenly apprehensive state was nonexistent in her usual procedures. Her method of care had always been straightforward, and she had seen far worse on other soldiers than a simple bare, unbloodied torso.

Excessive modesty was not a problem when it came to her medical work. However, this was completely new territory for the pair. She’d hardly seen Dimitri out of his armor, let alone without portions of clothing.

Nevertheless, it wasn’t his state of undress that her mind was preoccupied with.

Really, Isabelle was worried about the vulnerable position Dimitri placed himself in when he asked her to remove his stitches. Past encounters meant she was already privy to his hesitation in revealing his scars to her. She clearly recalled the time she’d offered to examine his eye a few moons prior. He hastily declined—something that seemed out of place at the time.

Eventually Dimitri confessed his, admittedly unfounded, fear of her being judgemental of the copious battle scars he possessed—the permanent reminders of his darkened past.

Despite Isabelle’s own collection of scars and most sincere reassurances, he had yet to reveal them to her. Until today.

In a different time, the situation would simply be a mildly embarrassing encounter, quickly brushed off after a few awkward moments and shy glances. Though of course, their shared experiences over the past six years had tarnished that lighthearted possibility.

As Isabelle busied herself with cleaning a small pair of surgical scissors, Dimitri timidly removed the thick black sweater he wore under his armor. He shivered as his skin was revealed to the cold air of the room, almost tempted to pull his cloak around himself while Isabelle worked. However, she pulled over her wooden desk chair and placed herself in front of him before he could decide.

Though they were directly facing one another, neither person dared to glance at their partner—unspoken words tense in the air between them.

After what felt like an eternity, but was really only a few seconds, Isabelle was the first to look up. Her eyes finally took in the myriad number of scars littering Dimitri’s upper body.

Some were more substantial than others, with the largest one being a jagged white streak across the left side of his ribs. Others, like the few crossing the backs of his hands, were extremely small, almost to the point of invisibility.

Dimitri sat still, expression neutral under Isabelle’s scrutinizing gaze. She gently grasped his scarred hand in her own, causing him to lock eyes with her.

Slowly reaching up with her free hand, she lightly held his cheek, her thumb running just under the cloth of his eyepatch. Dimitri relaxed into her touch as his visible eye closed. He let out a small, contented sigh as she continued to caress his cheek.

She almost didn’t ask, but a short wave of boldness prompted her to murmur, “You don’t have to show me, but can I see this too?”

A beat passed, and Dimitri removed his hand from hers. Isabelle’s skin prickled and she retracted her hand, fearing she’d overstepped.

Her panic immediately dissipated at the sight of Dimitri reaching up to untie the small piece of fabric. He slowly pulled the black patch away, finally revealing to her the damage beneath it.

The scar was an uneven red, running diagonally from just under Dimitri’s brow bone to below the outer corner of his eye. The eye itself was still intact, the only visible damage a hint of cloudiness across his iris.

Isabelle inched closer, hand still raised, almost as if asking permission. He reassured her, “It’s alright if you wish to touch it. It’s no longer painful.”

Again, she rested her hand against his cheek. His eyes slowly closed, letting her have an unobstructed view.

Using her thumb, she lightly grazed his eyelid. The scar was rough, and looked much larger now that she could see it in its entirety.

“How did you get this?” she probed, wary of breaking the moment between them. Dimitri sighed, his voice wavering, “It happened shortly after my escape from imprisonment. A small group of Imperial soldiers overtook me, and one of their lances caught my eye before I was able to dodge it.”

Isabelle moved to grasp both of his hands in her own, trying her best to soothe him. This was the most he’d ever discussed his past injuries with her, and while she wanted to hear more, his feelings were her current priority.

“Thank you,” she said warmly, lacing their fingers together.

Dimitri’s eyes opened in mild confusion, “You’re... thanking me?”

Isabelle smiled, “I am. I remember how uneasy you were before. So, thank you for trusting me.”

“I’ll always trust you,” He confessed, expression softening.

Her smile widened and she leaned forward, kissing Dimitri just under his right eye, “I’ll always trust you too.”

She hoped her action reflected what she couldn’t find the words to say. I love you. Even through the moments you regret.

“Now, are you ready for me to work on this?” she asked, referring to the bandage still covering his shoulder. Dimitri’s expression widened in mild surprise, taken out of the moment, “Ah, right,” he chuckled at his reaction, “Yes. I am.” Her hands untangled from his, and she slowly began removing the tape holding his bandage in place.

Isabelle worked calmly, the mood between her and Dimitri immediately soothed from their earlier apprehension. She fell easily into the well-practiced routine of sterilizing her hands and the wound, then smoothly cutting the small pieces of thread holding it together.

Using her tweezers, she slowly began to pull each thin stitch from Dimitri’s skin. His face pulled into a slight grimace at the foreign feeling.

“Sorry,” Isabelle murmured.

“It’s alright. It’s just… strange.”

“Do you think you’d ever want to learn how to do something like this?” she asked, trying to distract him. Dimitri chuckled, eyes still focused on Isabelle’s steady hands. “While I’ve gotten a bit better, I still do not think I’m suited for such delicate work,” he paused, “and besides... I like this.”

Under different circumstances his comment would seem strange, but she understood his underlying meaning: “I like seeing the focused look in your eye, the methodical movement of your hands,” and most importantly, “I like that I’ve changed.”

At the start of the war, when he was plagued by survivor’s guilt more than ever, Dimitri would continuously refuse treatment for even the most dire of battle wounds. He would neglect his health until he was on the brink of collapse, forced to begrudgingly seek healing. Over time he became more comfortable with asking for help, something she was definitely thankful for.

Isabelle smiled as she pulled out the final stitches, “I like this too.”

She continued to work in silence, gently cleaning the now unsutured wound with a small cloth. Dimitri intently watched her deft fingers as they placed small adhesive strips to ensure the gash’s closure.

“You’ll need to be careful during training for a little while longer. I still don’t want you to risk it reopening,” she reminded him as she placed a fresh bandage.

“I’ll do my best,” he teased, accustomed to her excessive worry for him.  

She gave him an amused look of mock disapproval and handed him a set of bandages, “And change your dressings at least once a day. Come to me or one of the other healers if it reopens or begins to look infected.”

She stood, ready to put away her supplies, but a pair of arms stopped her. Dimitri’s grasp was lightly wrapped around her waist, loose enough to allow her to pull away if she wished. His face was hidden against her abdomen.

“I’ve missed you,” he mumbled into her dress.

She softened, her surprise quickly dissipated. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders as she hugged him more fully, kissing the crown of his head.

“I��ve missed you too. But I’m here now, Dimitri.”

Dimitri tightened his hold, her earlier gesture making him bashful. “Would it be alright if I stayed with you tonight?” he asked. ”I wish to stay with you a little while longer.”

Isabelle reached down, gently turning his head to face her. She gazed softly down at him, amusement in her voice, “Is that even a question?”

He averted his eyes, “Well, I didn’t want to be presumptuous and—“ She cut him off, “Of course you can stay. You always have a place here, you know”

He sighed, content, and rested his cheek against her again, “Thank you.”

It was then that Dimitri shivered, still affected by the chill of the room. Slightly releasing her hold, Isabelle reached for Dimitri’s cape and draped it over his bare shoulders, “Here.”

Without missing a beat, he reached to wrap her in the cloak as well, cocooning them together in its warmth. The pair remained in their close embrace, each of them soothed by the others proximity.

“As much as I want to stay like this, I still need to clean up,” Isabelle said, voice muffled by Dimitri’s hair. Dimitri nestled further into her collarbone, reluctant to let her go.

After a moment he finally pulled away, letting Isabelle move to gather her supplies.

While she organized her impromptu workspace, Dimitri began removing the armor covering his lower body. They moved quickly, both of them impatient to be back in the other’s space.

Dimitri completed his task first, and had just enough time to wrap himself back in his cloak before Isabelle followed suit.

Finally finished, she made her way from her crowded shelves back to Dimitri’s waiting form. He started uncrossing his arms, ready to be back in their previous embrace.

Instead of meeting his invitation, she paused at the head of the bed frame and unlaced her boots. Dimitri gave her a mildly puzzled look as he watched her move past him and crawl onto the small bed.

Laying down behind him, she held out her arms, “I know it’s not time for bed yet, but will you still rest with me for a bit?”

He immediately turned to meet her waiting grasp and parroted her earlier words, “Is that even a question?”

“Very funny,” she happily retorted, pulling him in.

Dimitri laid his cape across them as a makeshift blanket, the fur-lined collar lightly tickling their skin.

They quickly found each other, their limbs tangling together as a side effect of the limited bed space and their mutual want to be as close as possible.

“I know I said this before but, I’ve missed you, Belle. I’ve missed being with you. Uninterrupted, I mean.”

Isabelle pushed an untamed strand of hair from his face. “You know I feel the same, of course. At least...” she paused, choosing her words carefully. “When this is over we’ll have time.”

Neither of them wanted to think of the real implications of ending the war, or if they would even be successful in doing so. For that moment they ignored thoughts of opposing forces and the sorely needed reconstruction awaiting them after victory.

They simply thought of having more moments like this.

“I want that. More than you know.”

Isabelle grinned and lightly pressed her lips against his, “I think I have an idea.”

The pair settled against their pillows, noses almost touching and eyes becoming lidded. Before they were completely pulled down by drowsiness, Dimitri broke the silence between them.

“And about my scars...”

Isabelle’s surprised gaze immediately met Dimitri’s calm one. She wasn’t expecting him to return to that subject so quickly.

“Not all of them are shameful,” he continued. Isabelle watched his face with rapt attention, waiting to hear more.

Dimitri smiled wistfully, “There’s one on my back that I received during the tragedy.” He skimmed his hand along her spine, grounding himself. “Even though that was one of the most awful times of my life, one good thing came from it.”

Isabelle reached up and ran her fingers through the hair at Dimitri’s nape, attempting to soothe him. He relaxed under her touch.

“That scar is the reminder of when I saved one of my dearest friends. It causes me to believe that maybe there’s a reason I’m here, whatever that reason may be.”

“I’m glad you’re here,” Isabelle said softly, sincerely.

Dimitri inched forward, gently kissing her, “After everything...I’m glad I’m here too.”

It means I get more time with you.

[shoutogepi]

top 10 posts of 2020

thanks to @katsushimaa and @todosweetheart for the tag! 💗

~~ generated using this site ~~

1. Taking Care Of Their Drunk S/O After A Girls’ Night Out ft. Bakugou and Kirishima: these hcs... man, i usually suck at writing hcs, but these ones?? idk HOW i even did these, bc i’ll reread them even to this day and feel so soft. i know yall are bakuhoes but kiris was my absolute favvvv. ugh, we just stan incredible, loving boyfriends. 

2. Shinsou Says ft. Shinsou: ummmmmmmmm im so surprised this is the top fic?? i mean, not to toot my own horn or anything but this fic did indeed smack. i’ve reread it a lot and at the end im always like... damn me. gj buddy. LOL KIDDING okay but seriously im actually really happy this is my top fic bc i was really proud of how this one came out and honestly, toshi needs more love <3 

3. Red Roses ft. Kirishima: this fic. o man. this was my first (and only, so far 👀) size kink fic and it was also my first attempt at dubcon!! well, if u could even call it that. but anyway, this one was so fun to write. i loveeeeee a big beefy kiri who has a dark side, and ugh the tats and the ponytail?? legs = spread.

4. Jealousy Has Its Perks ft. Todoroki: prob the most self-indulgent fic i have ever written. jealous, dom sho?? pffft hello there sir. and then i had to put in a lil sweetness in the confession at the end cuz yanno... those post-orgasmic feels are too strong. and also i love him. perhaps too much. 

5. my masterlist: LOL IDK WHAT TO SAY ABT THIS?? thanks to all y’all for bookmarking my fic library?? lmao

6. Spring Pollen ft. Hawks: ugh this one... idk man, hawks stans must just be really hungry bc honestly i hate this fic and think it’s so mf badddd

7. “Fuck You!””I Just Might.” (FYIJM) ft. Bakugou: omg this one. one of my first posts i think? still working on the third and final part now, hopefully it will be complete soon <3 it’s really long so it’s taking me a while to finish, sorry for the delay~

8. You Want Me To Call You Baby Girl? ft. Todoroki: my very fist fic for bnha. just pure filth, self-indulging my daddy kink and honestly i hated this fic for a longggg time but recently have come to terms with it being... dare i say it.... alright. LOL

9. Heart of the Storm ft. Todoroki: this one.... this one is probably the most favorite fic of mine that i have ever written. i just... todo was such a gentleman and then so hot. i... i have @lildreamer93 to thank for helping me make this masterpiece, we talked about it endlessly for weeks heheh. it was really fun to write the scene-setting as well, with all the ice and snow... mmm... keep me warm, sho~~

10. Pull Of The Moon ft. Kirishima: so this fic is actually a fic that i had on my old GOT7 blog!! i reread it and was like... damn, i made the main kinda sound like kiri here.... so i took the ball and ran with it, just replaced the names. i have a shameful past with werewolf fics (cough cough wattpad) and this one was another self-indulgent one that i really enjoyed writing!!

thanks to all my readers and friends for supporting me this year. i can’t believe how much this blog has grown and how many great friendships i have because of it. i love you all so much!!! hope this next year treats us all well, here’s to the happiness and friendships that are to come/grow in 2021!

tagging (pls ignore if you’ve already been tagged): @todoscript @todorokiakina1​ @queensynderella​ @kingtamakimurder​ @whats-her-quirk​ @hoe-doroki​ @gallickingun​ @bnha-free-writing​ @fanfic-me-up​ @liltodo​ @wakaoujisenhime​

[soldouthaz]

fic writer questions! 

(thank you thank you @falsegoodnight ! it’s been a while since I've done this so I figured I would check out the updated stats!) 

1) how many works do you have on AO3?

26! 

2) what’s your total AO3 word count?

641,963

3) how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

one direction (published) and a bit of sterek (unpublished!) 

4) what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. like it’s a game 

2. give me love (by me and @falsegoodnight of course!) 

3. let me carry your weight 

4. make this feel like home 

5. somewhere in between 

5) what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

oh gosh -- I love me some angst but I just can’t bring myself to write an unhappy ending. I will say that I do have a fic that just felt extremely emotional and heavy while I was writing it and when I look back on it, which is the way this river runs! or I suppose sky’d be falling and I'd hold you tight could be considered slightly ambiguous as well! 

6) what’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I feel like (since all of my fics are arguably ‘happy endings’) the one with the biggest emotional payoff for me personally would probably be let me carry your weight, but tall stories on the page is just overall light and fluffy as well :) 

7) do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have not but I think they could be fun!!! feel free to let me know if anyone has any suggestions ;) 

8) do you write smut? If so what kind?

yes! a little bit of everything. to be honest sometimes it’s my least favorite part to write, but I enjoy mixing things up and trying to write and delve into things I'm unfamiliar with! whatever the fic calls for :) 

9) do you respond to comments, why or why not?

it’s my favorite part post-writing! I write for myself first and foremost, but it’s always incredibly fulfilling to be able to hear what people think and engage with them over something so important to me. I try to answer every comment I receive! 

10) have you ever received hate on a fic?

definitely, but I firmly believe killing them with kindness is always the way to go. everyone’s entitled to their own opinion (even if it might’ve been better off unsaid) and most of the time it’s just not worth it to read into it. 

11) have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of! (knock on wood!) 

12) have you ever had a fic translated?

yes!! parroting ris here and noting that I need to make a masterlist for Tumblr, but I do have a folder of them on my wattpad (@/soldouthaz) and some linked on my ao3! 

13) have you ever co-written a fic before?

yep! another shoutout to my lovely friend @falsegoodnight :)))))))

14) what’s your all time favorite ship?

harry+louis for sure, although sterek is definitely a close second! 

15) what’s a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

oh boy, there’s a lot. I've got a sitcom au that’s been outlined for about a year now that I am unbelievably excited about (like -- might be my favorite thing I've come up with EVER) but I have so many expectations and things that I want included that it’s going to take some time and a lottttt of effort to complete. fingers crossed it works out!! 

16) what are your writing strengths?

hmm... I'm not sure!! I tend to dump whatever I'm feeling at the time into my fics so maybe emotion? my all-time favorite thing to write is probably tension/pining/etc. so maybe those kinds of things :) 

17) what are your writing weaknesses?

as ris can confirm, I definitely used to use wayyyyy too many commas skjhdjk. I'm not sure where I picked that up initially, but I think I've gotten a bit better at it! 

18) what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

seconding ris again in my answer -- I think it can definitely make a fic feel much more realistic when used appropriately! 

19) what was the first fandom you wrote for?

*technically* it was Hollywood Heights if anyone remembers that show! then it was Teen Wolf, but the first fandom I ever published under was one direction! 

20) what’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

there’s a few that are especially sentimental to me for different reasons, but  nothing worsens, nothing grows has to remain my favorite I think. it’s a little rough around the edges and you can definitely tell how much I've improved as a writer, but it’ll always be the first fic I was really, truly proud of and that helped me through some difficult times in my life. it’s my baby! 

-- 

once again I'm horribly late to the trend and I've seen most of you already tagged, but as always I love love seeing what y’all’s answers are, so if you see this on your feed and think it looks fun, please feel free to answer them yourself and say that I tagged you so that I can read about you! <3 

I hope everyone’s doing well and hanging in there! I hope to be posting again soon :) 

[orangeoctopi7]

8 Things I’m proud of from 2020 (In no particular order)

@rum-and-shattered-dreams tagged me to do the thing like three days ago, but I’ve been busy with work and, uh... *playtime on Stardew Valley ticks over another few hours* ... working on my next fic for Stanuary, yeah!

The thing I’m most proud of that I did in 2020 is keep up a weekly update schedule for like five months! Of course, I was unemployed for that whole time, so I basically made fic writing my job. It was fun, and it kinda made me want to be a full time writer... buuuuut I don’t wanna deal with publishers and deadlines and having to find my own health insurance, and I really like my new job, so I don’t think I actually want that whole lifestyle.

1- The Good Ol’ Days.

I just realized I completed an entire 9 chapter fic this year! It feels like all my fic ideas are either really short or really long, so I’m glad this one turned out manageable. Of course, I’ve got a sequel in the works, so we’ll see how that goes...

2- A Tale of Two Secrets

I’d been wanting to write a fic about my headcanon that Shermie is a time traveler for a while, so I was very happy to finally get it written and out there.

3- Say What You Mean to Say

This is probably my favorite fic I’ve done all year! I like it a lot because I think it’s the most original concept I’ve done, not based on another person’s AU idea and not directly paralleling the show. I also enjoy it because I get to purposefully avoid and even lampshade some common fandom pet-peeves I have.

4- This Comic.

I also did a comic/illustration of Chapter 4 of Say What you Mean to Say, which is quite impressive considering I don’t consider myself an Art Person. I like to doodle, but I don’t know anything about form or composition or all that stuff, so I’m quite happy with how this comic came out.

5- With Great Power Comes Yada yada yada

I actually started this fic back in January of 2019, but I posted 4 new chapters this year! This one has become kinda more difficult to write as I’m not getting as much inspiration for this story compared to the others, and I just don’t feel as comfortable writing Mystery Trio as I do other AUs for whatever reason. Still, I DO have an ending in mind for it, and I hope to reach that ending this year!

6- Man of Wax

This was just a fun little One-shot. The inspiration just kinda hit me out of the blue while I was re-watching Gravity Falls back near the beginning of quarantine, shortly after I lost my old job.  

7- Oh yeah I did a bunch of Mario art this year.

Is it weird that seeing the Sonic movie inspired me to do a bunch of Mario art? Because it did. I just really love Mario, guys.

8- I posted Monster Falls art for the first time this year too.

This was also, I think, the most popular thing I posted this year.

Tagging @digikate813​, @anistarrose​, @optimistic-violinist​, and anybody else who want to do this. (Also no pressure to do this guys I know y’all are probably busy)

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

Which of your fics…

i was tagged by @praetorqueenreyna! thank you!! 💛

Did you think would get a bigger reaction/audience than it got: hmm maybe banished? but it’s a definitely a more niche and darker sort of maiko/mai-centric ficlet, so i probably shouldn’t have had such high hopes 😂

Is your funniest: uhhhhh almost a tie but probably see you again! it’s the first (and probably will be the only) modern atla fic i’ve ever written, and i had a lot of fun developing platonic zutara and the kataang meet-cute with plenty of comedic beats. i mean,, it’s funny to me at least 😂 i still laugh at the mental image of aang sprinting towards zuko and zuko having to drop everything to catch him, what can i say?

Is your darkest/angstiest: probably banished (for now 👀). i mean,, it’s automatically impossible to write a “mai learns zuko was banished” fic without angst, and i kinda pushed to see just how far that wound might cut her, wink wink nudge nudge if you’ve read the fic (i swear i love mai y’all 😂 i don’t know why i make her suffer so 🤧)

Is your absolute favorite: yes i’ve talked about them a hundred times,, yes i will do it again!! There’s a Fine, Fine Line (my Flash Thompson introspection) and all i know is gone (but i am not alone) (my aang-centric fic revolving around his grief as seen through his friends’ eyes) were fics i put my entire soul into and the fandom reception was wonderful,, i wouldn’t be who i am today if i hadn’t written those stories!

Is your least favorite: hahahahahaha anything from middle school,, bye (none of which is on my ao3 thank goodness)

Was the easiest to write: honestly?? probably keep the paper lantern lit (my zutaraang week 2020 collection of oneshots) because i’d been DYING to write some zutaraang and every prompt sparked an idea right away except for like one which i still eventually figured out. aang having two hands for zuko and katara OWNS me (as it should)

Was the hardest to write: oh my god Sigh No More (my maiko much ado au) was SO hard to write,, adjusting the language while still keeping the rhythm of Shakespeare’s lines was the most difficult thing i’ve ever tried to do 🤦 fanfic truly is a labor of love 😂

Has your favorite line/exchange/paragraph (share it): bruh,, my memory is not that good,, i forget everything i write once i post it. uhhhhh,, okay. this is one of my favorite snippets i’ve written from a recent fic, because i feel wrong calling it my Favorite when there’s probably other things i’m just as proud of but can’t recall lmao:

And then he was kissing Mai, his hand resting at the curve of her neck atop her collarbone as he pressed her back against the trunk of the tree. She wrapped her arms around his waist in response, pulling him into her body to deepen the kiss before one of her hands rose up to entangle itself in his hair. Zuko regretted nothing more than when he had to pull away to breathe.

“Don’t think this means you’re off the hook,” Mai whispered, her chest rising and falling with a rapid speed that told Zuko she’d enjoyed the moment as much as he had. She touched their foreheads together. “Just because we’re on kissing terms again doesn’t mean my expectations have lowered.”

Zuko was simply grateful she was willing to give him another chance. He pressed a gentle kiss to her jaw. “Ask me to do anything for you.”

There was a long pause. The air seemed to grow heavier in the silence.

“Kill my parents.”

(from Sigh No More, my maiko much ado au)

shakespeare aus just hit different, what can i say?

Have you re-read the most: mmmmm i guess There’s a Fine, Fine Line? i like rereading those comments bc they’re all the sweetest so sometimes i reread the fic too bc im there lmao (generally speaking i don’t reread my fics once they’re posted 😂)

Would you recommend to someone reading your work for the first time: probably meeting mai! it’s just a soft little ficlet of the gaang all welcoming mai into their friend group like she deserves 💛

Are you most proud of: i mean,, it’s gotta be No Ordinary Exchange (my rayllum college!au). it’s the longest fic i’ve ever completed (it’ll be around 175k when fully posted!!) and honestly i just had so much FUN writing it. i was able to write pretty much every scene i’d ever dreamed of for rayllum in a college!au, of course, but i also ended up diving into subjects i never thought i’d approach, like soren’s relationship with viren and even introducing a few OCs. it was a massive undertaking, lmao; i wrote it over the course of 8 months and a lot of it was completed in early quarantine and my last summer before college. so it’ll always hold a special place in my heart for helping keep me motivated and happy even after so many things i’d been looking forward to senior year were cancelled, yk?

tagging: @drowning-in-cacophony, @ambivalentmarvel, @korvidaee, @penguinsledder, and @itsmoonpeaches if any of you are interested! no pressure 💛

[keeptheotherone]

(Found this in my queue today, 1/28/23. I wrote this the week of December 6th, 2020. It was a poignant reread; the hope of COVID vaccines, the belief that the pandemic would end, and my prophetic comment about trauma recovery. I took two months of mental health leave three weeks later.)

Tag Game

Thanks for the tag, @thedistantdusk! I promise, it’s taken me a week not because I wasn’t excited but because my work schedule is understudy to Miranda Priestly.

Fandoms: Harry Potter and Sherlock.

Where you post: FFN, AO3, and Tumblr (when I remember). All my Sherlock fics are on both sites, but AO3 only has some of my HP stuff as I haven’t bothered (and won’t) to add the stuff I’d already written before I opened my AO3 account.

Most popular one-shot: I’m assuming you don’t want me to go all scientific nerd and check the site statistics? No? In that case, I’m going with ... ahh, what is the name of that fic? You know, the one where Ron and Bill are chatting about Hermione during the night, it’s set during DH ... it’s right on the tip of my tongue ... not ILW, not More Important Things ... A Quiet Beauty, that’s it! 

I wrote A Quiet Beauty mostly on a whim, and it got this deep emotional response from people that took me by surprise. I had to ask one of my friends what was so special about it because I didn’t see it at first, but now it’s a favorite for me too.

Most popular multi-chapter: Judging by ... hits? Number of reviews? Enthusiasm of comments? Faintest, Slimmest, Wildest Chance was definitely the most popular multi-chap in progress I’ve ever had; it started hot and only got hotter. I still get the occasional comment on it; just Sunday someone described it as “phenomenal.” :D :D Don’t ever be afraid to comment on an old fic, y’all; that one finished in 2014!

I also have to give a shout-out to One Big Happy Weasley Family here since it gets a lot of love too. In the Sherlock fandom, The One Where Sherlock Sleeps With Molly.

Favourite story written so far: Oh, y’all, I’m horrible at favorite books even when I’m not the author! I love OBHWF for the freedom it gives me as a writer. I love Hidden Chambers and Unseen Monsters because Bill!, it ticked a lot of goals, and it was my first-ever idea for HP fanfic before I even knew what fic was (despite having written it as a child without knowing it). Misbehavior Number 101 was supposed to be a lighthearted funny fic that ended up with more punch than I expected ... not to mention it practically wrote itself. It’s by far the easiest thing I’ve ever written, and that includes my one-shots! A Quiet Beauty is a favorite reread (Bill!), and Manic Monday was just plain fun all the way through.

Fic you were nervous to post: All of them (when we say we’re constantly refreshing the comments page, we mean it!). But assuming you mean, like, REALLY nervous ... my first two (A Good Weight and the first chapter of Girls Like You), which I posted simultaneously and thankfully got some really early--like, within 1-1.5 hours--positive feedback. Chapter 36 of FSWC. Chambers, because Bill was a much-loved character in fandom but also somewhat of an OC and I introduced my first OC, Amy Green. Misbehavior, because I took a big literary license there, having adult Ginny at Hogwarts, and I wasn’t sure readers would buy in. My first couple Sherlock fics because he’s such a unique character with a unique voice. Humor is always a little dicey--one never knows if others will find funny what you found funny--but I’ve become more confident in that over the years, plus I ALWAYS pass things I think are funny through at least two or three other people first. Always.

How you choose your titles: With great difficulty and gnashing of teeth.

Complete: On the one hand, I’m proud to say all but three of my fics on FFN are complete, and two of them (OBHWF and Postscripts) are deliberately open as one-shot collections. On the other, I’ve been promising “the school-year fic” for 6-8 years and a Sherlock sequel for six, so....

In progress: The One Where Mary Gets Involved

Coming soon/Not yet started:

Mycroft and Anthea get lost in “this backwoods colony,” aka the USA. featuring the ever-popular There’s Only One Bed! trope

collection of Sherlolly one-shots based on Adele’s 25

post-Sherrinford Greg & Mycroft, Mythea 

maybe some outtakes from Manic Monday

Ginny and her teenage nieces re boys for OBHWF

James interviews his uncles re little sisters when the Potters find out Ginny is carrying Lily, also for OBHWF (probably)

I would love to do something with Ron at Shell Cottage during DH but haven’t worked it out yet

I could go on, but you don’t really want me to (come on, you know you like the surprise of new fic!)

Do you accept prompts? eh, sort of ... like the time a regular reviewer on FSWC suggested a follow-up convo between Ginny and Charlie after she and Harry were in London, since Ginny had gone to Charlie for advice beforehand. I thought that was a good idea but it was too late to work it into the fic, so it became Chapter 15 of OBHWF. As for taking prompts “cold,” where someone gives me a pairing/setting/plot idea, no. My brain just doesn’t work that way.

Upcoming works you’re most excited about: Honestly, I’ve become such a slow writer/overwhelmed by real life/the time demands of hospital nursing that it’s hard to see writing as something other than another task on my to-do list. I AM NOT giving up; I will finish the 8th year and Sherlolly trilogies, and I’ll probably always write some, albeit erratically. I don’t want to go on a soapbox rant, but nursing during this pandemic has been an unimaginable mental and emotional challenge that leaves very little creative space or physical energy for anything other than necessities. I pray it lets up as vaccines roll out this week, but I’m afraid the first months of “relief” will actually be trauma recovery for those of us in health care/first responders. 

On a brighter note, I am open to input for which of the new fics listed above you’d like to see next, so comment and let me know!

Tagging @mydearprofessormcgonagall @bluestwitch @writingwife-83 @darnedchild… and anyone else who wants to play!

[soundofseventeen]

Bee’s (soundofseventeen) Recs

Hi, here are my recs! They’re mostly Erin’s but I do have a few that I’m kinda proud of.

Tell Me (Seungcheol): I love anything that involves a character not telling their friends, family, s/o or really anyone about the struggles they go through and Erin really hits the nail on the head here.

Take This to Heart (Seungcheol): This song is really special to me and Cheol is  really special to me. What better way to combine the two than this?

Call Call Call (Jeonghan): I don’t know why I love this one, but it’s really sweet and dorky and telemarketer part just gets me every time.

Everything You Are (Jeonghan): Originally I hated this one when I wrote it just bc I was angry and I didn’t wanna post it just bc it’s not a happy one. It’s on my list now bc you can grow from something that feels like the end of the world and you can come out on top, and sometimes we have to remember that our idols are human.

Three’s a Crowd (Jeonghan): I love how Erin managed to keep the core friendship platonic while adding the third person...who also happens to be the other best friend. 

Kiss Me Slowly: (Jeonghan): At the end of the day, I love the thin line of friends to more and when to cross it.

I can’t believe Erin’s really gonna make me say this and I can’t believe I am too. The deception. All the Joshua fics have been my favorite bc they’re either so sweet and fluffy and domestic and leave you happy for the rest of the day or they just kinda shatter your heart. It’s fine though.

Hold This (Junhui): It’s super lame and it’s so dorky and it’s the sweetest thing ever. I can never stop smiling like an idiot whenever I reread it.

Kissing in Cars (Junhui): I can’t really explain this one, but I hold it dearly in my heart. This song from Pierce the Veil just makes me feel everything and this boy makes me feel everything. If there’s any fic I’d want y’all to read, it’s this one.

My Fairy Tale (Junhui): The friends to lovers; the bittersweet feelings; the last sentence that ties it together; I just love everything.

Carnival (Junhui): The secretly dating thing gets me every time, especially when they get caught and it’s just very fall-y.

Midnight (Junhui): The whole pining thing in a fic is very underrated, especially when everyone knows someone has to confess but they don’y. I love the realism and how you just wanna yell at the screen and writer to make them come together. 

Come Back (Junhui): ANGST my dudes!!!! I live for things like this!!!! I love that sometimes not everything we write has to be sickly sweet and happy. I WANT TO FEEL THINGS. I WANNA CRY UGLY TEARS and then cheer at the happy ending. 

7 Things (Soonyoung): I think that as a writer, one of my favorite things that I’ve done was give readers hope, only to just take it away it and this one did it justice. Erin and Haley haven’t forgiven me for this one but I did warn everyone. 

Make You Smile (Soonyoung): I’m a nerd at heart and if anything has pens, paper, a notebook, books as the key thing in a fic (along with coffee shops), I’m a goner. And it’s so sappy!!!! You can hear my heart crying!!!!

Firsts (Soonyoung): I’m very bad with feelings and this just made me happy for some reason.

Can I have This Dance? (Soonyoung): I loved this a lot more than I thought I would to be honest. Erin just has a simplistic happy way of writing and I know that everything will be alright.  

Movies (Wonwoo): A Halloween-ish type special from Erin that is hysterical to me for some reason. (Bonus points for the gif she uses!)

Favorite (Wonwoo): Small moments leading up to the big finale? My heart does a thing still!

Terrible Things (Wonwoo): This one I was really wanted to do bc it was a story begging to be told and Erin liked this too???

Speak Now (Wonwoo): You know when you read a book that completely shatters your heart but you go back and reread in hopes it ends differently? This is it. I will never forgive Erin for this one bc she came out with this one around the time I dropped the fact that Wonwoo wasn’t my main bias anymore and -ouch. This is probably my favorite one she’s done.

Someday (Wonwoo): Let me just say...friends to lovers...my absolute poison.

My Life Would Suck Without You (Jihoon): I always pictured Jihoon falling in love with someone he’s known for years and the outcome for this made me happy?

Home (Jihoon): This one I wrote in a couple of days after hearing Home and it wasn’t too shabby, I guess.

First Night (Jihoon): The ending made my heart go whoosh honestly.

Cafe Crush (Seokmin): The way to my heart is giving me a coffee shop setting and this just made me uwu

Fake Date (Seokmin): I don’t know why I adore this one, but I do! It’s so cute and funny and I meant this to happen irl

First Sight (Seokmin): The angst! The hope! The little thing you’re relying on to make it end on good terms only to just...fall apart at the seams.

When I Grow Up/ 1.5 (Seokmin): Truthfully, I don’t know why I wrote this one, but it made me really happy and I’m just a hopeless romantic at the end of the day and apparently everyone loved it so everybody wins. Plus I know it made Erin really happy and that made me even happier. (And it’s one of my favorite seventeen songs which shocks people for some reason?)

All the Mingyu ones, lmao. Everything that’s been written about Mingyu, I’ve loved.

Night and Rain (Minghao): I was inspired to start writing for these boys when I heard this song and this was the outcome. This is my firstborn, and I still listen to this song a lot.

Muffins (Mingaho): Another dorky one that just has me :D

Cheated (Minghao): Again, I won’t always write happy stuff and this was another one that just made me happy to write.

Tattoo (Minghao): I’m really sentimental about this one. Like I love it a whole lot?

Photo Credit (Seungkwan): This is probably the most original piece I’ve ever read and I still laugh about this!!!!! 

Temporary Goodbye (Seungkwan:) The bittersweet moment of last days is just something that hurts. You want more time but there’s always hope for next time and that’s what gets you through the times.

You Had Me at Hello (Seungkwan): I just started writing this one, but pen pals y’all. :( Letters, and rambling and talking to each other is just beautiful. Trust me, it’s a special kind of friendship. 

8:43 (Hansol): I don’t know why but I love reading about the flashbacks and present times. Erin’s a genius y’all.

Just the Way You Are (Hansol): Literally the time I was fighting Haley to admit her love for Vernon, I was listening to Pierce the Veil’s cover of this song (and I was going through it bc I adore this band and their music!) and I realized that this would make a good fic...although she does hate me for this one!

Lost Woods (Hansol): Mutual feelings? Sign me up. And honestly, the “No one called him Hansol anymore (or something along those lines is the sole reason it’s up there lmao)

How Would You Feel? (Hansol): Yeah, yeah...I’m just a big softie and apparently I can do cute shit like this (I’m really happy with how it came out though and I didn’t expect everyone to like it?)

Birthday Treats (Chan): I hate my birthday too, but I suppose I’d make an exception for him :(

Ice Cream (Chan): Erin and I unintentionally collaborated on this bc she said it was too short and she let me add on to it so it’s special bc we haven’t done anything since the Princess series.

Locked In (Chan): the thought of being locked in the same room with the person im crushing on is equal parts scary and exhilarating...aka my guilty pleasures!!!!

You First (Chan): I just...love break ups and make ups and the whole “let’s try it again” thing

Thirteen Ways I Said I Love You (OT13): They’re short and sweet and it’s postcards

Friends to More (OT13): FRIENDS. TO. LOVERS. NEED. I. SAY. MORE.

Hogwarts Seventeen: Erin and I talk a lot about AUs and Harry Potter so this made me GEEK

Once Upon a Time (OT13): I wouldn’t stop bugging Erin about my theories and I just...she doesn’t disappoint!

Serial Killers (OT13): Y’all I love shit like this; the creepy and scary and just wow 

Funhouse/ Thriller/  La Llorona (OT13): Funhouse was my first attempt at haunted houses; Thriller for scariness and La Llorona for the urban legend and dia de muertos!!!

[moodyvalentinestories]

❥ 2019: Year in Review.

I was going to have this finished and posted at 12AM on the 1st, but life got in the way. So, yeah, it’s a little late, but hope you all are going to have a wonderful year (and decade, oh my!).

Now that 2019 is over, I kind of want to have a quick look at what’s happened for me (and, more specifically, this blog) in the last year. While I originally joined this fandom on tumblr back in Fall 2018, I kind of... disappeared for a while, I suppose, until I came back in Spring with very few updates to O Thomas Hunt, Wherefore Art Thou My Professor? over a couple of months.

Then Mid-August came. And I’ve started posting A LOT more. Haven’t stopped since. Which is good, I suppose.

In any case, I’m gonna go ahead and have a look at what went on in 2019...

1. Things that happened last year...

❥ Wherefore Art Thou My Professor?

I managed to finish O Thomas Hunt, Wherefore Art Thou My Professor? on September 24th. So, basically, 70-ish chapters in a little more than one month. Granted, very short chapters, but still.

❥ RCD Appreciation Week

This marked the beginning of me kind of, sort of, being slightly more sociable on here. Also, though I still find some people a little intimidating, it kind of made me less scared to talk to people behind fics I consider superior so that’s good. And it really was so much fun! Writing for it, seeing people’s contributions, and all that. Loved. It.

❥ 100 Followers!!!

I believe this happened in November, and I was going to make a whole post about it (with a fic giveaway and all) but I haven’t had the time for it yet. It’s coming. One day. Still, thank you all! For following, for liking, for reblogging and replying and being so lovely to me 😭

2. Writing stuff...

I was wondering how much I’ve written this year (for HWU and RCD, anyway) and... well... looks like I’ve written 157,965 words in total. Most of these between August 16th and December 29th.

Also, while I do write mostly for myself, I’m still kinda curious to see which fics were the most popular... 👀 A Top Ten list may seem excessive, but I have posted a lot of fics so... I’m doing it. You can’t stop me.

1. Some Rules Are Meant to Be Broken: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt (NSFW) Still surprised to see this is my top fic, but I’m not complaining. I’m always struggling with smut, no matter how much I love it, so seeing y’all like it means a lot.

2. A Holly Jolly Christ-Mess: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt (partly NSFW) Most popular part was the 24th, which at 5k+ words is the longest part to any fic I’ve ever written. Also longer than any of my one shots. 2nd and 3rd most popular would be the bathtub sex and the shower sex.

3. The Exception: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt Day 1 of RCDAW, adorableness, Halloween theme. Yeah, I guess that’s cool.

4. A Birthday Surprise: MC/Reader/”You” x Thomas Hunt (NSFW) Didn’t think someone’s birthday present would make it onto this list, but I am pretty proud of it. Probably one of my better smuts, not gonna lie.

5. Something Just Like This: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt (partly NSFW) Most popular is Part 3, in which Ryan and Addison meet and that ship kind of starts to sail :P

6. Nostalgia/Missing Her Mini-Series: Natalia x Thomas Hunt The most popular part is the first drabble, Nostalgia, which is just a super short 100-word-drabble.

7. O Thomas Hunt, Wherefore Art Thou My Professor?: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt Where everything started! My first Hunt fic. Most popular part is Chapter 71, in which Rachel tends to Hunt’s wounds after he punches someone for her.

8. Rules: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt (NSFW) This one took ages to complete. I abandoned it a million times before I finally went back and finished it.

9. The First Date: Rachel Fields x Thomas Hunt (partly NSFW) Not surprised to say that the smut was the most popular part of this mini-series.

10. Must Have Misunderstood: Olivia Clarke x Thomas Hunt One of the few RCD MC x Hunt fics I’ve got. Also one of my many attempts to ignore canon because I’ll always hate the way that first kiss went down in RCD2.

Also: big, big, big thank you to everyone who always likes and replies and reblogs. And everyone who’s interested enough to be on my taglist and all that. I really, really super-duper appreciate every single one of you 💕

3. What about 2020?

I’ve got a lot of plans, fanfic-wise, for the new year. Multiple series I’m working on as well as a couple requests and shit I just want to write for no reason at all. I don’t like making promises I can’t keep, so maybe don’t think of this as a ‘this is definitely coming in 2020′ type of thing. I just want to share with you what I’m currently working on, and what might be coming your way soon.

❥ multiple Thomas Hunt smut requests from this prompt list (currently: 5) ❥ Thomas Hunt x Rachel Fields: kind of moving in together mini-series ❥ another Hunt x Rachel series... ❥ Thomas Hunt x evil-ish!HWU MC series. Very long, very terrible, very NSFW. ❥ Thomas as the best man at HWU MC and Chris Winters’ wedding 😢 ❥ Sugar Daddy!Hunt series ❥ escort!MC one shot or series (to be determined...) ❥ more chapters of Wherefore Art Thou My Student ❥ Hunt x a new OC series. Closer to RCD than HWU, for once!

Don’t really know how to end this post. It’s kinda useless, too, but... uh... I didn’t just want to jump into the new year without appreciating the last one and making some plans for 2020.

Happy New Year! It’s never too late to say that, okay? 

[thewhiterabbit42]

Rabbit’s Top 10 fics of 2018

Fun fact: over half of my Masterlist  was written this year.  

Mind completely blown, considering my free time crashed and burned around the time manfriend and I had a new addition to our family.  I have no idea what I even did with my time before my second child or how I didn’t have more fics last year.  

I couldn’t have done it without your feedback and support, and I’m also blown away by how popular a few of my fics became.  I know notes aren’t everything.  They’re like that line in Whose Line is it Anyway:  where the games are made up and the points don’t matter.  But that doesn’t stop content creators from feeling good when something takes off.  

So thank you.  For all your likes, comments, and especially your reblogs and more time intensive feedback.  Below the cut are the top 10 fics that you guys really enjoyed this year and a little something about them :)

10.  Pick Me Up (Gabriel x reader) - Gabriel shows up on your least favorite holiday and tries to cheer you up with some pick-up lines.

This fic almost didn’t get written.  It was for a pick up line challenge and I busted it out at the very last minute.  Overall, I’m pretty happy with it, but I wish I’d had a little more time to expand on it.  

9.  Imagine Gabriel realizing he loves you but not knowing how to deal with that… (Gabriel x reader)

Ah, yes.  My imagines that aren’t really imagines in that my wordy ass can’t help but write more than  a little snippet.  I’m pretty proud I was able to keep this one short and you guys still were pleased with it :)

8.  Caught in the Act (Gabriel x reader) - The reader’s looking for some help getting a release and finds more than she bargained for.  

I can’t believe this is actually a thing (or that Cas’ white ass made it into the warnings).  The porno ideas started as a crack conversation between myself and the wonderful @blondecoffeecake​ and collided with a request I’d been trying to write (unsuccessfully) for a few weeks.  I meant to do a follow up to this one but never got around to it.

7.  Never Again (Gabriel x reader) - Dean has you meet them at the bunker where what you lost so long ago comes walking back through the door.   

The episodes this fic is based around haunt me.  Not only with what happens in them or what it means in canon for Gabriel’s character, but with all the possibilities they create.  I loved exploring, albeit briefly, what might happen if Gabriel returned and had had someone waiting for him this entire time.

6.  Long Enough (Gabriel x reader) - Kiss prompt: staring at the other’s lips, trying not to kiss them before giving in

This is just one of those straightforward fics that capture the moment where things tip from friendship to more than friends.  Nothing but fluffy feels and heart floofs in under 1k words.

5.  Within the Dark (Gabriel x reader) - request for having to hide with very limited space in the dark, bodies pressed together, his breath on your neck, tension building until it snaps.  

This was another S13 fic that branched off and looked at another what if things were slightly different scenarios.  I wrote it parallel to the episodes as the were airing, which I love doing and wish I had more time to do.  It’s just so much fun to take things and run with it before the writers potentially mess it up and make me bitter about their plot lines. 

4.  Kibble (Gabriel x reader) - Sam and Dean ask Gabriel to cat sit for you, and it leads to a surprising discovery.  

Fluff!  So much fluff here.  Men who are soft with animals is my kryptonite and you can’t tell me Gabriel wouldn’t be a big ol’ marshmallow when it came to small furry things.  This is also another mind blower in this fic made the top 5 with almost 300 notes and it wasn’t posted until late October.  Guess I’m not the only one who likes me some soft archangel.   

3. Imagine Gabriel and Loki playing a high stakes game of poker and the prize is you (Gabriel x reader, Loki x reader)

Oof.  I’ve been meaning to write a full version for this for so long.  This might have also been my first fic with Loki in it.  I remember trying to write him for weeks, and everything I tried I just kept rewriting.  I definitely had cold feet around him until I finally just wrote him, and now he consumes at least half my creative energy when I should be completing commissions.  Fucker.

2.  Third Time’s a Charm: Part 1 (Gabriel x reader) -  Gabriel unexpectedly comes to your aid and reveals a part of himself you never expected to see.

This was written for my Smut Apocalypse (which I hope to be able to again this year in some form).  There’s no actual smut here, just the precurser setting the story up for it.  I had a loosely outlined idea for the direction I wanted to take this series in, but after the response the first two parts got, I’ve gotten cold feet because I’m afraid the subsequent chapters won’t measure up to the first two 😶

Which pretty much means your most liked fic of the year was… 

1.  Third Time’s a Charm: Part 2 (Gabriel x reader) - You don’t know what to expect from Gabriel now that you know about mates, and despite Cas’ attempt to help, nothing could prepare you for what happens when you invite the archangel over to talk.  

This fic, by far, has the most notes out of any that I’ve ever posted.  Not counting part 1, my next most popular fic ever trails by 130+ notes.  I guess y’all are really big fans of the mate/possessive smut.  I never expected it to be this popular, or any of my fics for that matter, and it makes me really happy that so many of you enjoyed it :)

So those were your favorite fics of last year.  I hope 2019 allows me to continue to bring you guys new content and that you continue to enjoy my work!  

[femslashy]

2018 fic year in review

thank you so much for tagging me @homosociallyyours !! this was really fun (and also a bit hard haha) to do ^__^

1. number of stories (including drabbles) posted to ao3: 19 (6 100 word seasonal drabbles, and out of the rest 4 are under 1k and 2 are chaptered but one of those is still a WIP)

2. word count posted for the year: 142,383 which is def more than i’ve written in previous years but my initial goal for this year was 200k and then i lowered it to 150k and then decided i should focus less on word count and more on actually finishing the fics lmaooo

3. list of works posted this year in order of posting:

the tesco fic (although i didn’t make the tumblr post until recently)

three spring drabbles (100 words each)

begin again [timestamp] (my only snowbaz fic in 2018)

we’re swimming with the sharks until we drown

SPHERICAL

got me an appetite, now i can taste it

Take a Chance on Me

Getting Naked on Camera (NOT CLICKBAIT)

my favourite colour is you

louis tomlinson’s completely 100% foolproof guide to snagging the fit bloke next door (3 100 word drabbles)

no better place than right by your side

days gone by (WIP)

love the cronch

zero to sixty

where the love light gleams

4. fandoms i wrote for: mostly one direction and by that i mean i posted a timestamp for a carry on fic from 2017 and the rest was one direction lol

5. pairings: harry/louis, simon/baz (ONCE)

6. story with the most hits: Take a Chance on Me with 10975 hits :o

7. story with the most kudos: Take a Chance on Me with 426 kudos

8. story with the most comments: Take a Chance on Me with 52 comments threads

9. work i’m most proud of and why: well Take a Chance on Me was both my first time doing a big bang as well as the longest thing i’ve ever written (twice the length of the previous longest!) and i’m still completely in love with the art for it courtesy of @vulpixlou and i def don’t go back to stare at it ever nope 👀👀

10. work i’m least proud of and why: i mean i could nitpick the hell out of my stuff and i know there are certain bits i would write differently now but at the same time i created something with my brain that didn’t exist before and that’s just too cool not to be proud of ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

11. a favorite excerpt of your writing:

this is from Take a Chance on Me (shocker) and i was having trouble thinking of my fave but then i was skimming through all of my fics and ngl i had forgotten about this bit but y’all i’ve been trying to work a Dramatic Airport Reunion into a fic FOR FUCKING EVER and i finally did it and i actually don’t hate it? (spoiler for the ending of Take a Chance on Me)

“See…” Louis starts. “See, there’s this guy. And, oh god, he’s an absolute twat. Wanna know what he did to me?” Harry nods faintly, and Louis, emboldened now, goes on. “So, I already knew who he was, right? I knew him, because he’d been in this god-awful boy band for years, and even if me bloody sisters hadn’t been so bloody in love with him, I’d still have known him, because he was just that famous.”

“I wasn’t that famous.”

“Don’t interrupt,” Louis chastises, and Harry mimics zipping his lips. “So this guy, I knew him, but he didn’t know me, but, fucking hell, I think someone forgot to tell him that, because there I was, minding my own business, when this kid just…” Louis giggles then, because the memory is just so ridiculous, “he just starts fucking singing to me, can you believe it?”

Harry shakes his head. “What a weirdo.”

“Right? The weirdest.”

“What happened next?”

“I fell in love with him.”

“What? That soon?”

“Of course not, Jesus, Harold. I’m not that pathetic. I waited the appropriate amount of time to fall in love, thank you very much.”

“Is that why you’re here, then?” Harry whispers. “Is it because you love him?”

“That’s part of it, yeah. I love him, and I love the way we just fit, and I adore his daughter, and our pets are friends now, and I think our sisters are best friends now, so they didn’t actually give me a choice, but do you want to know the biggest, most important reason?”

Harry nods quickly, so hard his chin bumps his chest, and Louis’ so fucking in love with him at that moment that these are the easiest words he’s ever said.

“I’m here,” he tells Harry, “because I was lying in my own bed, in my own house, surrounded by all my things, and all I wanted to do was go home.”

He’s yanked forward then, Harry’s fingers digging into his shoulders, and he barely feels the pain because it’s Harry, and everything’s good when it’s Harry. He’s babbling into Louis’ neck, and the only words he can make out are his name and “love you” and he shivers with the feeling.

Harry’s hair has grown out enough since the night Louis snuck in to see him that he can tangle his fingers in the strands. So he does, pulling Harry’s face away from his neck and pressing their lips together. Every kiss feels like an apology. Every kiss feels like home.

12. share or describe a favorite review you recieved: so this miiiiight be cheating but i received two comments on a fic i wrote in 2015 and it was kind of a surprise that something that old still held up and people still enjoy it? def made me feel better about my current writing and also anyone who quotes my fics back to me has earned my undying love and affection

13. a time when writing was really, really hard: i have adhd so p much always ahahaha

14. a scene or character you wrote that most surprised you: the entirety of “we’re swimming with the sharks until we drown” ngl because i struggled with the like… morally gray criminal-y elements? and portraying the two of them in such a different way while still staying in character which i like to think i nailed? hopefully lol

15. how did you grow as a writer this year? i don’t feel like a i have? but i’m also bias and hypercritical so maybe i did and just didn’t realize ahaha

16. how do you hope to grow next (this?) year: i want to enjoy writing again and i want to finish more fics and not let them rot in my docs because of self-doubt

who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer: okay so first @amandaisnotwriting is the real MVP as she bears the brunt of my whining/complaining/drama queen moments as well as the fact that she listens (some would argue is forced to :p) and reads over fic for a pairing she doesn’t ship for a fandom she doesn’t care about 😂😂😂

@rainbowbaz always makes time to look over my fics even when she’s crazy busy and is honestly amazing and saves my fics from americanisms ahahaha

and FINALLY we met p late in the year but but @livingatthelairport ‘s comment on “the tesco fic” helped me out of a writing slump and now she’s become my cheerleader (and friend 💜) and that’s make a huge difference in my attitude towards writing! it’s also easier to write a fic for a specific person than worry about the opinion of a crowd which is def something i’ve been missing in this fandom rip

also to everyone else who has read my fics, listened to me rant about them or just helped the process along in any way at all this is a GIANT thank you!!

18. anything from your real life show up in your writing this year? i mean i can’t think of anything off the top of my head but a lot of my inspo comes from the world around me so probably lol

19. any wisdom you can share with other writers: there’s nothing wrong with feeling jealous of other writers because i’m not a fan of hiding feelings just because they’re ugly as long as you don’t let it fester and turn into resentment or make you bitter. there are a lot of factors that go into a fic becoming “big” in a fandom but honestly most of it is just random chance so don’t beat yourself up because someone else’s success is not your failure and it’s nice to get recognition for your hard work but if you’re writing solely for the feedback then you’re writing for the wrong reason and that will lead to the resentment and bitterness mentioned earlier

also if you compliment someone you say you like their outfit but if you complement someone then you complete them

20. any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

I’M GLAD YOU ASKED

these are all the things i didn’t start and/or finish in 2018 that WILL be completed this year

the cat fic

the doctor fic

the final three chapters of days gone by

penpal AU

Space. Florist.

teenage fanboys who are also best friends

baking blog fic

a short follow up to tacom

twitter drama fic

80’s/’high school’/secret admirer!AU

something based on yawning grave by lord huron

part three of the alien harry series

chocolate orange holiday fic

LA fic (wtwm)

70’s fic

monkey fic

i’m also planning to do the @larryabroad challenge again because i had so much fun with it last time :D

21. tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read:

p sure everyone has done this but if you haven’t then do it now! and also tagging @cosyblack k bc you’ve had a really good year even if i have beta bias 😂

this took waaay longer than i thought it would omg but it was nice to take a look back!!

[tragidean]

2017 Fic Roundup + Reflections

Here’s to another year! I forgot to add this yesterday but I was too busy burying my head in the metaphorical sand. I feel like I wrote some of my best and favorite work this year, and for those of you who read and left comments and kudos, I love you and appreciate all of your nice words! I know I suck at replying to comments, but I promise you, I love every single one of them. 

Here’s my yearly Destiel roundup! Thank all y’all for joining me this year! (☆’s are my personal favorites)

January: ・once you’re burned you’re not the same - 2.2k (Teen)       -Coda to 12x9

February: ・whiskey to wine - 879 (General)      -Coda to 12x10 ☆Forget the Sky - 26.3k (Teen) [DeanCas Pinefest Challenge]      -After winning the lottery, Castiel takes Dean on the trip of a lifetime--touring Japan, no strings attached. But how is Dean supposed to enjoy the scenery when all he sees is Castiel? ・one more sunset, maybe i’d be satisfied - 2.1k (Teen)      -Coda to 12x12

March: ・Shatter - 6.8k (Explicit)      -Castiel finds himself in the front seat of the Impala in 2004, sitting next to a man who doesn’t believe in Angels and certainly doesn’t believe in himself. 

April: ・As I Am - 2.9k (Teen) [Dean/Cas Tropefest Mid-Winter 5k Challenge]      -Visiting his family for Christmas, Castiel meets a young pianist at his local church--and incidentally, saves him in the process. 

May: ・see the stars light up the purple sky - 1.1k (General)      -Castiel finds himself in Limbo.

June: ・Runs Red - 8.5k (Mature) [SPN Casefic Challenge]      -Escaping an oncoming hurricane, Dean, Sam and Castiel take cover in an abandoned house in the woods, only to discover that it’s not a spirit that they’ve run into, but the soul of the house itself, and it’s hellbent on killing all three of them. ☆King of the Road - 15.8k (Explicit)      -In the middle of the New Mexico desert, Dean finds an Angel crucified in a church. And really, he should’ve left him up there, because all Castiel wants is sex and pot and someone to lean on. Not necessarily in that order. 

July:  ・Game - 3.7k (Teen)      -Coda to 12x13 ・Silent City - 3.1k (Mature)      -To make ends meet, Dean dances weeknights at a strip club in Lawrence, and puts up with wandering hands and lewd glances, all until someone exposes him on stage. His savior comes in the form of a man wearing a trenchcoat, and the most sinful lips Dean has ever seen. ・we gave love a chance - 5.2k (Teen)      -After a brutal hunt, Dean, Sam and Castiel hide out in a seasonal beach house, and Castiel tends to his wounds in the sun and sand, learning how to love in the process. ・Overflow - 1.6k (Explicit)      -Dean finally relents and agrees to Castiel’s recent request: sounding. 

August: ・Solace - 1.1k (Explicit)      -Dean’s never quite gotten used to the feeling of Castiel’s fingers inside him. ☆Faith in You - 6.7k (Teen)      -Dean loses an eye in an encounter with an Angel, and comes to accept his faults over time. A little help from Castiel doesn’t hurt, either. ・i think i’ve had enough - 820 (General)       -Self-acceptance takes many forms. 

September: ・This is Me - 3k (Teen)      -It’s a stupid thought, Dean knows, but he can’t stop thinking about how it would feel to have Castiel touch his soul. ・Are We in Trouble Now? - 18k (Mature)      -In the aftermath of Sam’s possession, the earth’s population goes from six billion to a few hundred thousand in the span of three months. In the search for his brother, Dean finds himself hospitalized with the same disease that’s killed the world, staring up into the eyes of the Angel sent to reap him. And like hell is he dying without a fight.  ・i’ll earn your trust - 2.8k (Explicit)     -Thrown five years into the future, Dean spends his first night sleeping outside of Castiel’s cabin, until the morning when Castiel asks for a favor only Dean can fulfill.  ・Keep on Falling - 4.9k (Explicit)      -Camped out on the lake, Dean happens on Castiel cleaning his wings. ☆Only Time - 2.1k (Teen)      -Castiel has a nest--and not only does he have a nest, but he also has eggs, all from other Angels, all in an attempt to restore the population. And Dean wants one of his own.

October: ・early this morning - 1.8k (Explicit)      -The first time Dean has sex with Castiel, it’s in the back of a Buick Super 8. ・Silken - 4.1k (Explicit)      -Dean finds a pair of ballet slippers in a box. 

November: ・running without - 1.7k (General)      -13x4: Castiel wakes up in the Empty. A brawl ensues. ・Doubting Thomas - 40k (Mature) [DeanCas Big Bang Challenge]      -Dean and Sam have been missing for two months. After a fruitless search, Castiel finds them on a fluke, after Dean crashlands in his garden, Sam in his arms, and Dean bearing wings. The horrors only go south from there, after Castiel discovers that his old rival, Af, is planning to create more Angels to fulfill his ultimate mission--restoring order to Heaven, and destroying humanity along with it.  ・night rider’s lament - 1.8k (Mature)      -Coda for 13x6 ・you could be a cowboy on the moon - 1.4k (General)      -Coda for 13x6

December:  ☆A Lot to Learn About Livin’ - 9.1k (Teen) [SPN Holiday Mixtape Challenge]      -After learning of a God living off the coast of Key West, Dean and Sam venture into the Gulf of Mexico to visit him--and his hoard of abandoned pets. Turns out, the God of animals isn’t such a bad guy. After all, what creatures would hand out Christmas dinner to complete strangers without wanting anything in return? ☆Honky Tonk Moon - 17k (Explicit)      -Sequel to King of the Road: Somewhere along the way, Castiel was bound to get hurt. Only, Dean didn’t expect confessions to come in the aftermath.  ☆Beautiful Mess - 12.8k (Explicit)      -As a result of years of harboring Castiel’s leftover Grace, Dean grows wings--except, not where he expects. 

Woo! I think that’s everything. I currently have my entry for 2018′s Pinefest challenge written, so that’s something to look forward to! I’m planning, as of right now, to participate in the 2018 DCBB and possibly Dean/Cas Tropefest, so be on the lookout for that as well!

This year hasn’t exactly been a good mental health year, but I got to travel the country like I always wanted and I got the medical test done that I wanted to do (and I’m still fighting the insurance company about.) All in all, I’m proud of myself and what I’ve written, and I’m hoping that while working on my book, I’ll continue to write more! I’m currently planning for a third installment of the Rooms to Let series, but beyond that is up to myself and you! 

My inbox is always open if you have requests, but for the time being, anon is off. I’m always on Twitter as well, if you wanna put up with my inane ramblings. I’m a nice person, please talk to me 😭 

I look forward to seeing you all this year! Keep reading and responding, and I greatly appreciate each and every one of you!

[missandrogyny]

Annual Writing Self-Evaluation 2016

so!! @alivingfire tagged me in this thing!! originally i wasn’t planning to do it but i figured that eh i should so i at least have something to refer back to next year yay

1. List of works published this year:

if i had the chance, the things i would do to you

that lace shirt

somethin’ bout you

blind from this sweet, sweet craving

to kill the mess we’ve made

day 3: tossed salad

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

i think i’m most proud of somethin’ bout you?? like, when i got the prompt for the spring exchange i was so excited, but also kind of nervous because it was such a huge idea and i’d never written an idea that huge before. i tend to stick to plots that are fluffier, simpler, and less…plotty, so to speak, so having the spring exchange prompt and spinning it the way i wanted to (with the kidnapping and the d/s, etc.) was daunting. there are definitely still parts that i would want to change in it, parts i would rewrite if i had the chance, parts where you can tell that i just got so sick of my own work, and i still want to give it a sequel, but yeah. to me that feels like a child i sent in to a spelling bee and although he didn’t really win any awards, he was still good enough to be in the spelling bee.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

probably my work for the 30 days of smut. i just…didn’t really know what i was working with. like, i didn’t know what the authors before me were doing, and i was way too shy to actually message them and ask and discuss plot, so i just sat on it until a week before it was supposed to be submitted and thought ‘fuck it, i’m just gonna do whatever’. also it was written in past tense, which i completely forgot how to do rip so i spent a lot of time just…reading it and trying to make sense of the tenses and crying over words

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

i’m always, always going to be proud of this paragraph. i don’t really know what came over me at the time of writing, but when i finished i just had this and i just…loved it so much.

(Later, Louis wakes up to find Harry sound asleep beside him. It’s dusk, and the soft light of the afternoon makes him look unreal, almost ethereal. He looks like a star, or perhaps some shooting thing—a meteor, or a comet, maybe. Louis watches as he breathes, as his chest rises and falls, watches the way the light seems to bend to him, making him look like the most beautiful thing to ever exist.

And Louis wants to save this moment, wants to keep him like this forever, naked and asleep in bed, but he knows better—he knows that Harry is a star, and you cannot keep stars like this to yourself. He knows that stars don’t belong here, don’t belong in dusty bedrooms beside boys with sticky fingers. He knows that stars belong in the sky and boys belong on the ground, and even a boy with the stickiest fingers will never be able to keep a star down.

So he gets dressed—slowly, quietly. Harry doesn’t stir at all, too lost in his dreams, and that’s good, because that makes saying goodbye that much easier. A sleeping Harry won’t draw him in with sea foam green eyes and cherry-red lips. A sleeping Harry won’t entice him to stay.

He takes a mental picture, embeds it into his brain, makes sure he has something to remember this by. Then he presses a feather-light kiss onto Harry’s hair, before he’s making his way out the door, closing it gently.

He doesn’t lock the door behind him anymore.)

5. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

whew. i get so many nice reviews on my fics, because people are too nice to me and too kind and they give me more credit than i deserve, honestly. some of my favorite ones are the long ones, the ones that ramble on about the parts that they liked. i also like the ones when people said they stayed up to read it because they couldn’t put it down–it’s so, so flattering, because there are a bunch of fics i stayed up for, and i know the feeling, and people having that feeling over my fics are just ❤️ 😫 (although y’all should…really sleep skjdhfkjads sleep is important)

oh!!! also, i absolutely love it when i get reviews from other writers!! like for example dolce has left a review on…two of my fics and i have each review screenshotted and saved on my phone and i look at them when i’m sad jskdhkjhads i scream about dolce reviewing my fic to anyone who’ll listen tbh

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

it’s kind of shallow, but writing became really, really, really hard when i changed my laptop last august. i don’t know why, it’s like i can’t produce anything i like on my laptop. it’s a psychological thing i’m still trying to get over, even until now.

oh, it was also really hard after my uncle died.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you

ummm. i’d say the way i characterized niall in “if i had the chance, the things i would do to you” surprised me at the time i wrote it. i still have no idea how he turned out like that. but i like it hahhaha.

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

i think i became a bit more willing to experiment? last year was my first year writing 1d fic so i just mostly stayed in my comfort zone, writing the things i was sure about. this year saw me publishing fics that pushed my boundaries a little bit. somethin’ bout you is one. another is to kill the mess we’ve made, princess’ birthday fic. princess likes things i don’t normally write, so i tried to like, tailor the fic to her interests, which was why it had a bit of angst. my entry for the 30 days of smut was also just one huge experiment, i wanted to see if i could write harry getting rimmed. apparently i could.

also!!! i started actually, properly outlining my work. it’s a messy outline, but it’s an outline, nonetheless and it makes me feel like a proper writer every time i have to refer back to it jsfjkhads

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

i hope that next year (2017) writing comes much easier? of course that’s kind of…like a farfetched ideal, writing will always be difficult but i can always hope, right? i hope that i’ll also be able to write longer fics, maybe even publish a chaptered fic one day with a long plot. i hope to also get a better grasp of harry & louis, and all the rest of the 1d characters, so i can improve the depth of character/write fics with different ships (lirry, anyone? also i want to write an ot5 smut fic that’s my dream). i also want to have a better grasp of angst to be able to spin longer, more complex plots! i have so many hopes why am i so optimistic

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

i, of course, have to mention the person who got me to continue writing 1d fic after the first two i posted in 2015, the person who still consistently makes me write things and every time i give her an idea, she always says “why don’t you write it???” like wow that belief in me. the person who always reads my fics beforehand and screams about the parts she liked/parts she didn’t like (you have no idea how nerve-wracking it was to publish a fic she didn’t read beforehand. because it was a surprise. for her.) princess @britishhusbands always the best and always, always grateful for you.

other writers inspire me too, like rachel @alivingfire honestly rachel you are a huge, huge inspiration and i always tell people you’re the true mvp in the larrie fandom. @crazyupsetter is a huge inspiration as well, whoknows fics are always amazing. um. this year i also read another hazy may for the first time and @/delilah, i just. i think about it a lot. J @latitta are an immensely talented writer, and your words and your works always push me to be the best. @tornorrows i love you and your works, thank you for your words. @haydolce incredibly, incredibly talented, and your fics always make me so happy.  @gloriaandrews and @100percentsassy i love your works, whether you write it together or separately, and they’re always a joy and a pleasure to read.

oh!! j @harrysramonesshirt shares the same love for pretty words and quotes and poetry as i do, and she always sends me stuff to inspire me. it’s actually because of her i started a sideblog where i just reblog all the pretty words/quotes/poems i like, and refer back to it when i need inspiration (if you’re curious, you can find it over at @/stylestiques haha) j, thank you for the poems, the words, the another hazy may playlist you made, which has been the only thing i’ve been listening to for the past few months–you’ve been such an amazing source of inspiration.

other people hm. @louisdarling i love you, you know that, you don’t have to do anything to be an inspiration, you already are. @loveliestlarry all the best, amanda, i’m still a shit replier (will i ever not be haha), but thank you nonetheless. 

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

uhhh. usually the only thing that shows up from my real life in my works is whenever the character works out/boxes/goes to the gym hahaha. mostly, i draw from other people’s experiences–the small things that other people do, stories they recount back to me, or little throw away comments that they make, usually that’s where i get the inspiration. 

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

i think just. don’t be afraid to try out new things. like if you like an idea/prompt but are afraid you aren’t good enough for it, try your hand at it anyway. you might just surprise yourself. 

also. “fake it till you make it”. a lot of people have an idea but are afraid to write, because they might not be good. i’ll be honest–most of the time i just bullshit my way through fics. so just. bullshit it. don’t be afraid to write shit.

(wow i’m the worst at this)

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

i’m excited to finish my cuddling fic, which has already taken WAY TOO LONG. 😠. i also hope i’ll be able to finish this other fic which has also TAKEN WAY TOO LONG. i’m also looking forward to starting princess’ bday fic this year. AND RACHEL @alivingfire AND I HAVE SOMETHING PLANNED AND I’M SUPER PSYCHED FOR THAT. WE HAVEN’T HAMMERED OUT THE DETAILS YET BUT. IT’S GOING TO BE REALLY, REALLY FUN.

14. Tag three writers whose answers you’d like to read. ;)

@turtlekz and @backonefish and @tornorrows hiiiii if you haven’t done this yet!!!!

*All answers should be about works published in 2016. Also, you can skip any questions you hate or don’t want to answer, but please leave them on the list so that others can do them if they want. :)