#this was fun to write fbsbdjebfj

[one-black-coffeee]

I just saw your post about neil having disassociative disorder and I was thinking could you do one of Aaron having autism…i know this is random but i feel like i relate to him and neil the most and i have adhd and autism :)

aww of course i can!! i did my best to do some research but since this is both my first time writing Aaron and writing about autism so if i’m not portraying it as i should please feel free let me know!! 💗💗 (also this turned into a little bit of wholesome-healing twinyards, hope that’s okay!!)

Tilda never paid much attention to Aaron

anything she deemed “strange” was either ignored or punished. Tilda never cared to understand

a freak. that was the first name she’d granted him upon seeing the way he excitedly shook his hands or head

Aaron didn’t understand why

eye contact was never comfortable. if he could avoid it, he did. luckily, Tilda rarely cared if he looked at her so long as he stayed out of the way

during one of Tilda’s nicer periods, Aaron was 6. she hadn’t yelled in a few days. she’d brought home a packet of cookies to share with Aaron

she asked Aaron what he was learning in school. he told her they were studying bugs. she told him that was interesting

interesting.

Aaron ran to collect the jar of bugs he’d been collecting ever since his teacher brought in a silk worm to show the class. he knew so, so much about each little creature, explaining to Tilda everything he’d learned

Tilda yelled. the bugs were thrown outside.

he’d just wanted to make her proud

from then on, any “intense interest” Aaron picked up was hidden. books he brought home from the school library were shoved under his bed. hours spent dedicated to his hyperfixations were exclusively when Tilda left him alone in the house or after she’d fallen asleep

the twin brother he never knew he had made eye contact that was heavy and made Aaron want to scream

the older cousin who’d gone off to Germany was loud. even with headphones in, Aaron could hear him banging around the house. Aaron covered his ears more firmly to drown it out

Andrew didn’t seem to like Aaron

Aaron told himself that was fine. he had nothing to offer Andrew that Andrew hadn’t already traded

Nicky tried to help

while Aaron and Andrew both hid themselves away, Nicky smiled and asked questions and brought home food

Andrew ignored everything. Aaron hoarded the food he liked in the drawer of his nightstand. everything else was for the other two

by 19, Aaron had learned to carefully hide all evidence

any questions asked were met with blatant disregard or irritable muttering. he called was rude or awkward with every passing interaction through which he stumbled. he was the stressed out med student the longer he spent pouring over text books and forgetting meals, water, practice, everything

Kevin, for all his tunnel vision that included nothing but Exy and the occasional historical film, was the first to catch on

when Aaron played the same movie for the third time, fingers twitching and textbook open in his lap, Kevin sat on the opposite end of the dorm couch. Aaron quietly mumbled along with the movie, lines memorized through nothing but repetition. Kevin asked the occasional question and listened as Aaron looked away from his diagrams to tell him every single fact he knew about the movie

they didn’t talk about those days but Aaron found himself enjoying having someone listen

the rare times Neil and Aaron could be near each other without an attempted murder, they generally shared a silence. Neil didn’t care that Aaron was entirely focused on his video game and Aaron didn’t mind that Neil gave huffs of laughs each time Aaron died

those “rare times” slowly morphed into a mutual appreciation. Neil liked the entertainment and the opportunity to slightly bond with Aaron

Aaron liked having an excuse to move his hands and focus entirely on One Thing without judgement

Nicky often invited himself into the dorm and tossed Aaron a snack. one of two. the other Nicky ate on Aaron’s bed, rambling about something, while Aaron stared at the ceiling

“i know you forgot to eat, so share with me”

Aaron wanted to hate him

he didn’t

every interaction between Andrew and Aaron was stunted

Andrew threw a bottle of water slightly to the left of where Aaron sat and was amused by the startled jump. Aaron flipped him off but drank the water

Aaron offered half of the twig he’d been snapping between his fingers— a fidget no one had wanted to question— when Andrew’s jaw clenched tighter than it should have. Andrew flipped him off but took the offer

Aaron lost his patience with Bee and his layers of masks dropped faster than they were supposed to. his skin burned and itched, his muscles aches with poorly ignored need to move

Aaron glared at Andrew and walked back to fox tower

Andrew made it back before he did. as he left the dorm, he flipped Aaron off

a bottle of water, crackers, a twig with the bark picked off, and Aaron’s preferred hoodie were all thrown on his bed. Aaron tugged on the hoodie and downed half the water before picking up the note tucked under the twig

take care of yourself

Aaron kept the note folded into his phone case. he didn’t tell Andrew that. he didn’t say “thank you. you’re a better brother than either of us used to be” they both pretended it didn’t happen

it continued to happen