#though honestly i dont have much control over that either bc mainly i get an idea for an amv very suddenly

[woolydemon]

it kills me that there wasn't an apollo justice anime bc if there was i would 100% be making amvs with it

[imagineurfavs]

Astro - Cha Eunwoo A-Z

Who deleted all their requests before pasting it into here...?? ...this bitch...

----------

A - Aftercare Aftercare usually just consists of taking a super quick shower and changing the sheets if necessary. It’s very much a joint thing; he does stuff for you, but he expects some care in return lmao

B - Body Part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner) On himself he likes his eyes, he’s a sucker for deep eye contact as he pushes himself into you. On his s/o he likes their thighs/butt, the softer the better lol.

C - Cum He can get a little messy when he cums, which he’s honestly not a fan of. So he prefers to finish inside you purely for ease of clean up. Doesn’t mind using a condom, to him its just the most convenient.

D - Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs) He has quite a lot of more dominant tendencies that he tries not to show too much just bc it doesn’t fit too well with his “flower boy” image, but anyone that knows Dongmin knows that he can have quite a bit of a temper (he is an aries after all lol). So he sees sex as a perfect outlet for all that pent up stress that he can’t let out anywhere else, a place where he can finally be the one setting the rules, not following them. 

E - Experience This is a tricky one...it’s no secret that he’s incredibly popular with the ladies; but he’s also a lot more shy than he usually appears, not to mention how busy he always is. He’s got a little experience, but he’s by no means an expert lol

F - Favourite Position Usually just ends up being missionary with your legs thrown over his shoulder. That way he can maintain eye contact and set the pace as much as he wants.

G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous etc) Really not that goofy in the moment, he really gets in the zone and is definitely on the more serious side. It’s afterwards, when y'all are finally cleaned up and settled that he lets his soft ass self come out

H - Hair (how well groomed are they) I don’t think it’s something he’d really pay too much attention to. He wont let it get too out of control, but it’s not a priority lmao

I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect) Eeeeh...I don’t think he’d be all that intimate tbh. He thinks it’s a given how he feels, otherwise he wouldn’t be sleeping with you. So he doesn’t really see the need to outwardly show any emotions in the moment, when he’s busy focusing on the task at hand lol.

J - Jack Off (Masturbation) Boy does it alot lol, it’s his favourite way to de-stress. You can almost guarantee before any big event or TV appearance that he’ll take himself off to the bathroom and go at it lol

K - Kinks (one of more of their kinks) A lil bit of pain; biting, spanking etc. Nothing that hurts a crazy amount but stuff that’ll for sure leave a mark. There’s nothing he finds sexier than watching a red hand print appear on your butt. He likes receiving this kinda stuff as well, aside from maybe the spanking, but he loves being bitten, scratched, etc...just keep it somewhere it wont be seen.

L - Location (Favourite places to do the do) Literally just the bedroom. That’s it. He’ll try it out in as many different places in said room; in the bed, on the floor, against the wall, on the desk etc but it has to stay in the bedroom.

M - Motivation (What turns them on) Loves it when you touch his thighs, even if it’s just in passing or even accidental, it riles him up so much lol. He loves it when he catches you staring at him from across the room too, bonus points if there’s a lot of people around, you can bet that he’ll be eye fucking you right back lol

N - NO (something they won't do, turn offs) Absolutely nothing that involves even anything slightly public. He doesn’t wanna risk any part of his private life getting out, largely for the sake of your privacy also. Everything saucy happens behind closed doors...alone...probably with the door locked also.

O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) He’s so messy with it omfg. He loves to make soooo much noise when he goes down on you like it’s honestly enough to make you blush lord almighty, he really goes out of his way to make the most lewd noises. Highkey loves going down on you for that exact reason, he likes to make you all bashful and embarrassed lmao. When receiving he likes to just lay back and let you do what you want to him lol.

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc) He tends to keep more of a steady medium pace, but on certain days he can for sure get super rough...hold on tight lmao. He keeps a vice grip on your hips, there’ll always been tiny little marks left there from his fingertips.

Q - Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc) He wasn’t always a fan of quickies, but he’s grown to like them a lot more bc sometimes they're the only option. He’ll still only see them as a last resort though, if either of you have got somewhere to be but reeeeally can’t wait any longer.

R - Risk (are they down to experiment, do they take risks?) Nooooooope nope not down at all, sorry. Although, if you can promise him that it’ll be fun, and it wont leave the bedroom, then he might me down...maybe...but most likely not.

S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go, how long do they last? etc) I feel like he’s a one and done kinda guy lol. The rounds would be pretty average in length, but you’ll only get one out of him

T - Toy (do they own toys do they use them on a partner or on themselves?) Doesn’t own a whole lot, mainly bc he just doesn’t see the point, “why buy something to do what you could just do yourself...?” The most he might buy would maybe be some super fancy silk ties to use on you...they’d have to be super pretty though, can’t forget the aesthetic lol

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease) He’s SUCH a tease. He deliberately takes his time with every move he makes prior to actual sex lol, foreplay with Dongmin is a lengthy process lol. He loves testing your patience, watching you get more and more frustrated with him.

V - Volume (how loud are they, what type of sounds they make) He mainly makes more whimpery kinda noises and sighs. He can get pretty loud, but he’ll only let himself get loud if you are as well, he doesn’t wanna be the only one making noise.

W - Wild Card (a random headcannon) Is a bratty dom a thing? Bc that’s the energy Dongmin gives me lol. Like, as opposed to giving you any form of punishment if you dont listen to him, he’ll get kinda whiny and annoying. He for sure has a lil bit of a prince complex lol, like he wants to almost be kinda served and worshipped, and will definitely get bratty if he doesn’t get his way...

X - X-ray (what's going on inside those pants) Average in length, maybe a tiny bit thicker

Y - Yearning (How high is their sex drive) Honestly, I dont really think it’s all that high. BUT with that being said, when he does get in the mood, it happens all at once and very intensely sdsdg 

Z - Zzz... (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards) He’ll stay awake for a while afterwards. Depending on the time of day, he’s perfectly happy to get up and go do stuff, he doesn’t get too sleepy afterwards.  If you wanna sleep though, he’s more than happy to settle down and drift off with you 

[misterbitches]

some thots. having a bad time so this is rougher than usual. oh well

....

i guess he really does know hiim best cos if that was my mans (man specifically cos if anyone else did that id take it more srsly) i would be like oh my god ur singing me a love song? i would love it but i woudl SCREAM in embarrassment. UNLESS it was a really deep love song that's about us dying together.

like i want to eat ur skin type of thing (drain u nirvana) lmaoa but i really like this song it reminds me of that velvet underground song (the only one i know cos of juno lmao) and nico or whatever 'i'm sticking with you)

my adhd would be out of fucking control i had to spend my time listening to this looking around i kept getting distracted by a tissue and thinking "wow this song is nice but i wish it would end bc i am getting distracted" and lo and behold i paused it and i have to pee and i know it's gonna take forever to undo this

ok about 12m later i turned it back on and they kissed and then he bit the corn then that night li chen also lost his virgin teas after watching gay porn and being like "hm interesting" and he'll be like "i see, ur dick is not medium sized"

i'm honestly gagging i cannot at this 12 year old marrying his mom

beautiful theyre beautiful

ayea you fucking psycho we do too because he was 17 and we had to witness it (or well, other people did cos i didnt watch the show even tho wayne song is [BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEP] and i want him to [BEEEEEEEP] and ppl even liked it which is fine like i get it in theory but they put this in my eyeballs so i'm gonna make fun of it bc it's fuckin DUMB lmao like i can't I CANNOT and he said "u were so persistent" BITCH UR 30??!?!???!?!?!?)capi hve it on mute and i tried to get a screencap of li chen and mu ren like together and not just his face but i cant find the timestamp and seeing their faces as they get married is literalyl traumattizing i'm like scremaing at my screen going "HE'S 5 HE'S 5 HE'S 5" and every time theyre like "we acn live forever together" like no bitch ur bones rae creaking

also is the officiator white? if anyone knows why or if that's common i'd love to know more. EDIT: HE ISN'T I JUST THOUGHT HE LOOKED LIKE MOBY FROM THAT ANGLE

anyway here

i'm almost done with this fucking bullshit and i am in a really ould mood and usu they make it a bit better but imo it's kind of....annoying i guess balancing all these story elements and introducin gother couples (even in the periphery) since the story in itself can't focus. i feel like all in all the time spent with these two is a lot more limited and we get the feel for the rship because of their chemistry as actors, irl chemistry as friends and colleagues, and hopefully being happy and working on a good set. so it isn't the strength of the writing or production.

for some reason they get like less dynamic ways of being together which i think is part of their charm, they do things their own way, but the writers really should have substantiated this more. it's really just the way everyone in the show has managed to deliver these AWFUL story lines and production decisions (like seriously who the fuck was on costume? lighting?)

like maybe hot take but all the moments that are cringe and insane in the show are not pleasant, per se, because they aren't thought out clearly. so they're not a joy to watch in the normal sense but the actors are good enough to pull it off. i didn't cringe at the talks they had because it felt like actors like acting these lines out instead of us being embarrassed for it and you CAN TELL theyre embarrassed.

this is a huge kudos to the casting director and the actors and whatever crew that actually did a good job. i don't particularly like watching bo xiang and his grandfather husband not because of the content but because i feel like, to me, they're so awkward even though they have chemistry. i don't have that issue with xing si and his rapist brother boyfriend because watching them is actually really pleasant, it's intimate. this isn't to do with the story though because when it hits you how devoid this other person is and how stupid the situation is it changes (for me, for me, for me, this is all my opinion think whateverrrr u want im not telling u 2 ok!)

so truly kudos to this cast. idk if i'm misremembering here but imo the most cast appropriate series in this was crossing the line and close to you. one is a decent atmosphere and execution (yes even with that brother story line, notice the major key differences though because that's a sincere false equivalence. they try to execute power imbalances soooo badly and then fail every time but here's one meant to shock too and it was just likelmao ok girl?)

it may not make sense to say either in a writing way or for the character to do it but i believe that whoever the characters these people are supposed to be especially those super not well written on the page still get that message aacross (yong jie's actor is a good ex. not sure if i should ccongratulate him for having the worst job on earth and the worst character and his character is flat but. ostensibly they should let their actions speak for themselevs but what they do is they back themselves into a ccorner with unsuretyabout their characters or a dilemma that pops up they just want to excuse it. well guess hwat u couldnt do enough legwork. but to some extent the disposable side couple works here on a um "our eyes see them and get it" way

also to me it seems like they chose this story just to have this specific wedding. like it's a timely topic and i'm pretty sure like another provision? (correction? idk) was made WRT taiwanese same-sex marriage so it's topical but it isn't like a "papa and daddy" situation where they're interacting in it and there (for ex: the pride parade) and there being like real life terms and consequences. here it seems like they were like ah yes wedding ah yes dumb couple from modc bc we kiled off the other one sooooo (then outsource them to life love on the line u__u) then hamfisting in some fucking message which is funny bc

- despite the hints peppered in and the clear attraction they both acknowledge ur like ~not gay just him~ even tho...i mean i just. again they dont read over what they write i don't think considering. but wahtever.

- the only gay dude (verbally said) is with his rapist brother with an awful power dynamic oh or IS a rapist (gao) (or his brother but i think it was just a "im a psycho so it's him" thing unless they said it. in which case idc cos i wasnt paying attn but that's also not great) or i guess the wedding but like....that's also a ridiculously inappropriate and dumb relationship taht it's built on. i mean i don't really see much respect her so i dont particularly want to hear abt gay weddings being important when they didn't even utilize it in the story beforehand and have we ever. this is a huge indication to me that it was a reverse engineered chosen story beforehand (if it was one) or thought of

soooooo

so reversal of that....it didnt give us enough time to breathe with these two at all but for both of the actors they can capitalize what's on the page and the writers didn't. like their dynamic is very i give/you give like taking car eof each other etc that's why

again, no artist worth their salt will ever say their work meant nothing. that's a cover up. i'm sick of lazy production and then getting away with it claiming being subversive or attacking an issue by not doing anything. we show crazy shit all the time but it has a POINT and ur point is "i like the gays" then girl.....i mean it's not great

but the acting really carried it. i have a feeling if this series continues it might continue to use more experienced actors cos maybe the budget goes up but they also have less inhibitions now when it comes to acting. i like the way li chen expresss himself and teng teng too. i like anson a lot and there's some angles that did not do any favors and i think eh has to get more control of his body movements (bc he's SO LARGE and thin) but he wasn't bad at all and there were real human tears. of course i, personally, favor charles tu. he has more control over his body because he has...less to work with and he's a bit bigger and he was really great in this role. he's a himbo a bit of a meathead but you like him. you like them. there's some things i think they had them say and do that they wouldn't let happen if they stuck to the characters and the story (mainly liking that dumb idiot rapist)

what i notice is that the reprehensible actions people criticize others for in the show and in real human life lalways gets turned around. teng teng being surprised that this boy's grandfather boyfriend met him when he was a junior in high school and he's 12 years older and him apologizing for being shocked and then whatshisface going "ur better at it than most people" and then the convo about gao with whatshisface and then rapist brother comes to pick him up. they are admonishing gao but thinking that rapist brother is noble for doin gwhat he did (and oh rapist brother shows up) like the hypocrisy and the decisions are immense. so now it's like "guys see he's a great guy" like girl STICK TO SOMETHING but whatever so i live in this universe where muren and li chen do everything right and have lots of different interesting fun seex with all their friends. i would write this but i cannot i am dying

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Debuff Zane Build

i am tired of not seeing this build in all the zane build videos i watch so im sharing it here because its stupid fun bc u run fast and kill faster. it’s not meta, but its fun as fuck and u have a lot of damage and survivability with it. I’ve completed M4 Slaughter Shaft with it- haven’t tried on M10 yet but i have faith. p.s its 4 am pls have mercy if there’s spelling mistakes.

what ur gonna need is a band of sitorak, zheitseiv’s eruption, a seein’ dead, and the piss grenade. everything else is fair game, whatever u want. try to get it to have the sntl cryo anoint bc good. but u must have the 4 main items for this to work perfectly (it also somewhat works with a low level Frozen Heart bc best shield in the game but you will die a lot more)

also i need a fucking name for this build help

oh god oh fuck i forgot i was playing through the handsome jackpot dlc again

oki im ready to party

this is my current loadout

sometimes i switch the reg Q-System for a kaoson or a nighthawkin if i need ammo (OP QSystem is... OP but not as fun as a tracking grenade QSystem so i don’t care for it) and maybe the brainstormer for a reflux if many shielded enemies (i prefer the brainstormer over the reflux atm. so try for a brainstormer!!)

3rd slot, that’s a monarch which used to be a dictator b4 it got a straight upgrade. I actually don’t use the bipod unless im in a boss fight and don’t need to move fast. usually violent momentum and violent violence cover the dps loss

ur first 3 gun slots honestly don’t matter much. I have my reasons for using them, but you can use whatever u want i think, so long as its a strong weapon (bc unfortunately a lot of weapons are not scaled for m10). u dont HAVE to use the monarch or the Q system or the brainstormer. I recommend them, cuz theyre fun, but u don’t gotta if u wanna swap em out for a a kaoson or a yellowcake or a sandhawk or smth

the last gun is my zheitsev’s eruption. This bad boy, when u reload, shoots out homing balls of debuffery. So every enemy that gets hit with these gets a debuff. I have tried this with the needler but I prefer Zheitsev’s bc it can hit more enemies and once and takes less time. this gun only goes to Blane (ur clone). 

for the skill trees we have no points in under cover even tho brainfreeze is the best skill in the gaaaaame

explanations: 

really the hitman tree is p self explanatory, u wanna go fast as fuck boiii. My band of sitorak does not have the +15 movespeed while zoomer is active anoint (it has the break shield amp anoint, which is p okay. want movespeed, but a nice human from the reddit gave me this sitorak so i didn’t have to farm). u want drone delivery bc Blane will NOT be throwing grenades. If you try to make him throw grenades with the seein’ dead he will ONLY throw grenades and never fire his gun, meaning he’ll never reload. it’s a nightmare. anyway. u want the piss grenade (ideally with the +25% damage on thrown anoint). im not looking forward to regrinding this when they finally mayhem buff grenades.

we put one point into playing dirty because we want those extra shots and honestly with the amount of times seein’ dead can proc ur kill skills you’ll have it more often than not

we also have points in good misfortune for that sweet sweet uptime (which btw can be infinite using the brainstormer/reflux bc it is essentially a redistributor without the need for ur barrier) the monarch/dictator also does it justice

for Blane u DON’T WANT praemuntis. we want blane reloading as often as gotdamn possible. now unfortunately my seein’ dead gave me a +weapon mag size roll (im actually not sure if this affects blane, but im assuming it does) but it does have the amazing +5 donnybrook so I’m taking it anyway. I am so not looking forward to regrinding a good class mod when they finally release action skill buffs for them. i cri. i actually hear 3 points in donnybrook and 2 in violent violence is p good (or 1 in violent violence 1 in playin dirty) so maybe grinding won’t be so bad. maybe i’ll finally get a +weapon damage roll

u can grab 1 point in ducttape mod and put 4 points into borrowed time if you want. it doesn’t really matter. i current have 5 in borrowed time and 3 in pocket full of grenades (for some reason??? usually i only put 2 in.). U can do that and use those extra points for either ducttape mod or more points in playing dirty. 

u NEED quick breather. This skill has a STUPID interaction with the band of sitorak shield because of how quickly it recharges. I’m talking, the instant you swap with Blane, you have full shields and so does he. It’s dumb, I love it. Use it to get out of trouble.

so im probably gonna need to explain why i have 3 points in trick of the light: im a cryo slut. That’s it. put those wherever you want, just make sure you can get Double Barrel. i’ve seen builds where people actually go for brainfreeze, i might try that next time i respec.

Double barrel will make it so blane can use the zheitsev’s eruption and debuff your enemies for you. it’s worth it.

so the augments u want are these:

SCHADENFREUDE. because band of sitorak has such a tiny capacity, ur shield is constantly up. If its not, it’s constantly breaking from full capacity. this does have a fun effect with the amp shield break anoint, but mainly i like it for the 25% damage buff whenever it breaks. its a tradeoff for damage, ur constantly swapping between max shields and more damage, so its actually p constant survivability and damage over the long run.

i grab doppelbanger bc blane sometimes gets stuck in the floor and/or i don’t feel like running all the way back. i wouldn’t recommend getting which one’s real or digital distribution only bc u want him alive as much as possible. u can also get binary system instead of doppelbanger, its up to you

for Zoomer u want bad dose for the movement speed and (sometimes) static field (only if the enemies have shields). this is so if blane goes down or he isn’t taking damage, zoomer can refill ur shields. if the enemies won’t have shields usually i grab winter’s drone or boomsday depending on how i feel.

im actually gonna try to see if i can’t grab brain freeze. hang on. i know trick of the light is frowned upon for most people so lemme just respec. (im sorry i just love the vibes it gives me it’s like HAHA you thought that was me? no!!! boop. and then they’re ice sculptures and man i love h2o i wish emma had frozen more people the only people she really freezes are Greg and Miriam and honestly she doesn’t even kill Greg smh. (Greg is dr denman’s assistant. greg is highkey god.) I do like what she did to Mirami, the fucking implications that YES these teenage girls ARE powerful enough to instakill people, they just don’t out of the kindness of their hearts. Rikki was badass that episode too. actually i love the episode where rikki almost boils a dude alive for making a fool of her with ILLEGAL F I S H and burns people using steam from a pipe. rikki is my favorite mermaid- she knew what was u p. I wish mako mermaids was as badass as h2o was. and the cartoon. god imagine the cartoon violence. sigh. let them use their op superpowers to be SUPERHEROES. like in h2o au i have baron flynt puppeteer people to their deaths from Thor bc he has cleo’s powers like why couldn’t she do that to someone. Like dr denman “lmao bye bitch” or even charlotte (who imho wasn’t bad until cleo started being rude to her. cleo was 100% at fault that season). it wouldn’t have killed her!!! ... instantly. probably. ive never seen avatar in full but i did watch the blood bending episode as a child and as i understand it that’s frowned upon but hey. CAN BELLA TURN PEOPLE INTO JELLY?? harry potter 🅱oneless arms... my god.)

anyway, respeccing. 

there goes all my money. rip.

so i think im gonna have to live with the slower reload speed (sob) but yes u can in fact get brain freeze with this build. lemme show...

so ye in the event u just can’t live without freezing people (i know the feeling) feel free to do this. imma play with this for a bit and see if i can live with slower reload. I actually depend on the 100% cryo with zoomer active for all my cryo damage. i also use an ice breaker so they freeze fairly easy (but only on mobs. on bosses u want the snowdrift or something else)

this build isn’t really meta and u might have trouble doing a solo run of true takedown on m10... bc its true takedown on m10, but honestly it’s fun as F U C K. you CAN do it, but it’s not no thoughts head empty like barrier-redistrubutor/yellowcake zane can be so u gotta be on TOP of ur SHIT. i love it. running around killing stuff. it’s fun. i also love teleporting. it’s my FAVORITE THING. I STILL GET GIDDY OVER IT BECAUSE IT’S SO FUN. ask my friends, they will tell you, sometimes i’ll just start gushing over how much fun it is to teleport even though i’ve played zane since release. just. GFDGHKJGDFK so much fun. i just... b o o p. god i love this game. i took a break to play assassin’s creed odyssey (fun sneaky beaky game, pretty awful dialogue) so DAMN i missed this. 

here’s a link to a video I took on athenas (my favorite area to run. it’s this game’s bloodshot stronghold!) this is the playlist i listen to while playing Zane. i keep swapping songs during play bc sometimes they don’t fit my vibe or i get tired of them lol (spotify control is hooked to my 4th and 5th mouse buttons so i don’t have to stop playing) i forgot where my shock sandhawk was in my inventory, is what i use to demolish traunt. i was so scared i threw it in my bank earlier on sanc-iii lol (also yes i still slap blane’s ass. it’s to encourage him to kill)

and here’s a link to the save + everything I had on me at the moment (including the stuff i picked up in the vid in case u want it lol) cuz im lazy and don’t feel like clearing out my inventory. some of these are only m4-9. which ones? it is a mystery. you’ll know when the new update releases ;) (no but actually im so hype for mayhem level on the item cards. finally. FINALLY!!!)

why is this video taking so long to upload. hynnnggggg

oh god is that the sun

[rqs902]

.

enyu’s mom calls him "公子哥" is he rich or is this a JOKE LOL and his mom is at a bar IM CRYING HAHA 

i just get a feeling youku eliminated shiwei for dramatic effect... 

but aw xue en crying over weihao and mxy saying star master kids are all worthy to lin mo 

L O L i was gonna be like oh thats nice enyu’s dad asked about his friends, he’s really been paying attention but then he starts throwing these

L O L I SEE WHERE HE GETS HIS REALNESS FROM HAHAHHAHA

LOL NOW HE KNOWS HOW IT FEELS

omg xikan wanting to call luo zheng!!!! im grateful theyre still close, theyre doing such different things now

awww mubo !!! being all supportive and protective of zuo ye 

hHAHAHA omg fan yu talking on the phone to renyu is so cute, so expressive with the gasp when renyu says they just recorded elims and then the AHHHH and OH MY GOD when he says he and zaixi were eliminated and the ALSKJLAKS and loud sigh when renyu reveals he just tricked him hahahaha theyre so cute omg can fan yu pls show up at the next perf, id die

lin ran’s “new world new me” im cry

lol renyu’s getting roasted by his team mates but at least they didnt really ditch him 

what is this set up anyway? theyre given a mission to leave, so theyre allowed to run around... but not? who planned this lol youku......

LOL jin fan tryin to reason why theyll be ok going to guangzhou 

did their group just get special permission bc director li hao?

hahaha ayyy zhan yu jumped first, you go child! not surprised somehow that he’d love it

lin mo’s group went to the same place? LOL but also they seem so much more under control LOL such a guai group 

LOL WHY ARE THEY SO LOUD HAHAHAH i dont think ive ever seen people that loud on a roller coaster LOL 

LOL why am i not surprised enyu is the one carrying xzx 

i cant with xzx and his heelys omg

leave it to csp to relate bungee jumping to some great deeper meaning for zlj’s personal growth hahahah but good on the kid for going through with it. interesting that zixin said he sees himself in zlj so much

HAHAHHAHA THIS FACE

when reminded he’s the hormone representative his face changed so fast im crying 

ycw is laughing his butt off and i love how it says “children’s playground” in the background

when ycw gets thoroughly ignored

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA OSCAR’S SSHHHHHHHH AND XUE EN TELLS HIM TO WATCH HIS “LANGUAGE LANGUAGE” HAHAHAHHA 

i just realized theres an english speaking line in this group :’) syh, xue en, oscar 

awwwwwwwwww them all planning to sing him happy birthday on the dot and setting it up so he can be at the top at that moment awwww thats so fun

LOL the way that oscar cursed his way to the top and is sweating so hard LOL the poor kid omg HAHAHHA

aw he can tell syh drew the card

LOL ITS OKAY OSCAR I STRUGGLE WITH READING TOO 

get you a friend like ycw who’ll tell you that you can decide how to pronounce words right, just because its your birthday 

struggling to read xue en’s handwriting LOL 

HHAHAHAHHAHAHA HOW DOES XZX RECOGNIZE IT’S HUANG ENYU BY FEELING HIS PECS HAHAHHAHA

i feel the need to just say huang junrong looks so adorable in his bright yellow outfit hahah

there’s two types of kids in this group: hjr and enyu screaming their butts off, and lin mo and xzx wallowing in regret of their life decisions

hjr and enyu always saying its too short when the ride ends LOL

lin mo talking real talk over dinner about their feelings BC HES A REAL LEADER and knows how important it is to address this. these concerns are obviously very present in his mind, even when theyre out having fun to relax, and he’s still trying his best to figure out how he can help them and motivate them. 

makes sense that they would include enyu interview clips bc hes surely spouting the real talk, but i think its interesting its mainly him and lin mo getting screen time. 

enyu would be the one to speak up and say something when lin mo is trying to talk to them though. i think theyre both right though, im guessing lin mo is in part too nice, bc he doesnt feel comfortable enough with them to be as strict as he normally is, bc he knows they have reason to not be motivated and he feels bad for them. but at the same time, he brings up a good point that they themselves need to have their own motivation. it cant just be him putting in effort. and i HUGELY respect that he is telling this to them straight up bc its a hard conversation to have, esp bc im sure he wants them to like him as a friend. but i respect that he knows if they have problems they have to air them out bc lack of communication will be too costly. 

momo is lucky he has someone like enyu on his team who’ll actually talk to him with real opinions rather than just hide in fear of disrupting the status quo. literally enyu is the one voicing that he doesnt want takeout and he doesnt want to stay up late, and other people agree, but the surprise on lin mo’s face just tells you that he wouldnt have even realized these are things that are bothering his teammates unless they straight up told him, and thankfully enyu did, bc lin mo thankfully is reasonable and willing to change his habits for the sake of the group TO HELP THEM. hes willing to do anything he can to help them, as long as they tell him what they want from him. huang enyu’s lesson in communication, dont let people guess, just tell them straight up 

its interesting bc its clear enyu respects lin mo a lot, says he has the experience and the skill and the right to yell at them to get it together, but hes still not afraid to tell lin mo he thinks lin mo should be more strict with them. and then i respect lin mo for not backing down when being criticized and for strongly insisting that they need to put in effort themselves too. he cant force them to do anything they dont want to do themselves. they themselves have to want to do well. 

lin mo is really out here taking care of his group of children and leading them and helping them and looking out for them and im just floored by his leadership yet again. i really hope they can pull it together. 

lin mo is a dork and stanning him leads to mostly either second-hand embarrassment or disappointment. from qcyn to snzm, it just always feels like he’s being mistreated and taken advantage of and stepped on, and sad things just keep happening to him. but then he has these moments where he reminds you of why he’s worth stanning. why it’s worth waiting for something good to finally actually happen. and why he deserves those good things. its just so nice to see hes getting some appreciation and recognition for the things he does. at least youku let us see his leadership in action. 

aw 

totally not surprised akey is there to drive the conversation for their group’s real talk time. tyger co-leader translates clearly hahah

LOL LI HAO TOTALLY FORGOT THE SNZM DANCE LOL

im like not surprised xikan’s group got the least adventurous adventure bc hes not afraid to show how serious hes taking this competition, but also somehow still feel like hes not getting better treatment relative to being number one?? maybe im just overthinking 

honestly all things considered im okay with this being the debut group

i mean i love ycw and zry but i feel like this makes sense to me.

this looks scary lol lin ran wyd

but yea even the way they framed the cliff hanger for next week... why do i just feel like xikan is not being treated with the respect he deserves?? 

anywayyyyyyyyyyyy for 少年營業中

LOL gz’s impression of zlj watching scary movies sounds so accurate im ded

zixin is so adorable!! i love his outfit too ahhah 

LOL gz’s sassy response to zlj responding when xue en says he’s gonna talk about a cute trainee with highly regarded visuals 

why am i totally not surprised xue en didnt get scared but zixin got scared AGAIN lol 

why do i suddenly get the realization that we hardly ever see ycw and zlj interact 

it just feels weird to see them together even tho they obviously have overlapping friend groups lol....

poor shiwei isnt even here and they keep talking about him LOL at least theyre not even really roasting him LOL ycw and yzx too nice for that

im just DYING at the cto gege’s laughing SO HARD HAHAHA 

and ycw’s face LOL 

xue en’s laugh made this ep worth it LOL

wow should i be happy that lin mo is finally in the next ep of this side show, or sad that jin fan never got to appear and itll be the last ep :( im also excited to see lin ran again! wow its weird to think that snzm is ending soon, it felt like the first 7 eps were like a slow burn and now its a mad rush to the end 

[askmyboys]

Dean and Jason

Names: Dean Williamson and Jason Bishop | Genders: Male | Ages: Dean is 32 and Jason is 34 | Heights: Dean is 5'0" and Jason is 7'5" | Species/Race: Humans | Eye Colors: Dean's eye color is Forest Green (both their eye colors are going to be for their meanings mostly), and Jason has heterochromia- his left eye is Steel Gray, his right eye is Shadow Black. | Hair Colors: Dean's is Ginger (his hairstyle is a messy undercut), and Jason's hair color is black (and his hairstyle is an extreme spiky quiff) | Appearances: Dean l o v e s hoodies, he has a full collection of hoodies and its about all he wears tbh, his main hoodie is one that has the words "Fuck Off" written on the front and "Fuck You" on the back of it, he wears some ripped blue jeans to go along with it- most of his pants are ripped and the non-hoodie clothing is also ripped mostly (thats not the reason he mainly wears hoodies tho, their just more comfy ya know?), he also wears combat boots as well (oh and as a bonus he also loves tank tops- he just wears hoodies more), whenever he DOES wear his tank tops however- he usually has white bandages wrapped around his wrists and down his arms a bit (you know- like how some of those wrestlers wear sometimes), he's not SUPER muscular but you can tell he works out for sure, he also has a lot of scars on him- nothing TOO prominent- it just looks like he got into a lotta fights mostly (and of course, he has a circle beard that matches his hair color) Jason usually wears tank tops mostly, his jeans either have chains hanging down them or their ripped jeans, and of course combat boots as well- sometimes if he REALLY feels like it, he'll put on a... "fancier" outfit, those outfits are usually leather jackets with spikes on them, black fingerless driving gloves (ya know those ones that expose the fingers for one obvs but also they kinda reveal the knuckles too), the pants stay the same in both his main and secondary outfits tbh, he has a full beard, and oh BOY does this man look strong- he looks like he can easily lift a thousand pounds (not that GROSS OVERLY muscle-y look either btw just wanna make that v clear but he just looks- Idk- is beefy the right term to use? Lmao- you can tell I dont know shit bout exercise or any terms), he also has a TON of scars on him even on his face, he's covered almost head to toe in scars- big boy's been through a lot. | Personalities: Dean is a rough rowdy boy who won't take shit from anyone even IF he knows they could easily kick his ass, absolutely against authority- don't tell him what to do and stay out of his way while he's doing it or else he'll mess you up! He LOVES to fight tbh in general so sometimes he'll go picking a fight for just no reason if he's bored enough that is, he l o v e s to cause trouble and honestly hearing people scream in frustration at what he did or caused is always funny, he likes to pull "pranks" on people as well to frustrate them further, honestly you might as well consider him a masochist at this point because he seems to enjoy pain well enough, absolutely without a d o u b t LOVES mindless carnage, p much a bad boy? like jfc- this dude needs to seriously chill out, he's not a fair fighter either so you better believe he'll use weapons if he gets the chance. (tl;dr: Rough rowdy boy, will not take shit from anyone even if he knows they could beat him up, "Fuck authority and fuck your rules I do what I want bitches", loves a good brawl for sure- he is DTF 24/7 (Down to Fight lmao I couldnt resist), has some v e r y prominent masochistic and hell even SADISTIC tendencies at this point, loves to prank people and watch them grow more frustrated, loves frustrating people in general tbh, needs to chill but he won't, an absolute dirty fighter and he WILL use weapons against someone if he can, mindless carnage is his J A M, he does have a soft side however, but uh, his "Soft side" is only for ONE person and one person only h e h) Jason is.... pretty opposite of Dean, he doesn't start fights for the hell of it but uh he definitely won't take shit from nobody if they even dare mess with him or especially Dean, people don't usually mess with him anyways tbh- their too terrified bc he's s o tall and beefy looking that it intimidates people- not to mention the look he usually has on his face- he scowls a lot which just adds to the intimidation factor, he's pretty quiet most of the time (wow completely opposite of Dean in that regard, Dean is a LOUD BOI), he might look all intimidating and scary but honestly, that's because.... He absolutely is, he WILL snap your neck like a twig if you mess with him or god forbid Dean, he only has a soft side for o n e man, and it should be obvious by now lmao, a loner type mostly, you can usually find him in the back because its dark and quiet, now I won't say he doesn't have sadistic urges sometimes bc he absolutely does- he just has good self restraint ...most of the time anyways... he's not really a masochist but honestly he must have a HIGH pain tolerance because he BARELY reacts when someone punches or even cuts him. (tl;dr: Opposite of Dean in MANY ways, he doesn't start fights for the hell of it, but can and will defend himself if the situation calls for it, will not take no one's shit for sure, VERY intimidating- even one look usually sends people running, scowls like- a LOT- like Dean: "Don't you like, e v e r smile?" *cut to Jason smiling but its v e r y unsettling and disturbing looking* " Holy fuck... Nevermind...", usually hangs out in the background somewhere- where its quiet n dark p much, loner type BUT the only person he really likes hanging out with is Dean despite how annoying the little punk can be sometimes, definitely has some sadistic urges but his self restraint can be a great deal of help when those urges come around, not a masochist at all he just has a HIGH pain tolerance and doesn't even flinch at anything hardly, hell most of the time the most he'd do is s t a g g e r a bit if ya hit him with a weapon that is or run into him) | Side Facts: I will say, Dean and Jason DO fight each other a lot, arguments and even physical stuff BUT- lemme make it clear, they'd never hurt each other TOO badly, they just love to rough each other up a bit sometimes, its fun to them and they never have any hard feelings against each other about it- bc they do both love to fight, I mean- that dont mean they don't get salty if one beats the other in a fight, they do know self control and restraint when fighting each other however- they'd n e v e r ACTUALLY cause serious damage, they just a couple o' rowdy boys who are super fucking gay for each other. Yep. you heard me, the truth is out- Dean has a crush on Jason, and Jason has a crush on Dean- BUT... They don't actually know it, like sure- they know one another won't seriously hurt each other which both of them respect each other for that, but Jason doesn't know Dean has a crush on him, and Dean doesn't know Jason has a crush on him especially, I mean hell- Jason looks like he barely has any emotion and the only time he does is when he CAN cause some mindless carnage or destruction- most of the time he just looks pissed off. Truth be told, this is the only time they've ever r e a l l y been afraid tho... like, Dean's scared to tell Jason his feelings bc what if Jason rejects him or for some reason gets really pissed and p much leaves him there all alone, he just has a lot of fear and anxiety over this kinda thing, and Jason... he doesn't think Dean will feel the same and just make fun of him for that like "lmao your g a y? Gross dude" (listen, let's get one thing straight, first of all- their not, second of all- Dean IS an asshole BUT he's not THAT kinda asshole lmao) so Jason's got some fears of this too their just significantly different than Dean's- so if ANYONE of them tells each other bout the feelings, it'll probs be Dean firsthand- Jason's just gonna keep quiet of that in fear Dean'll make fun of him for this kinda feeling, especially towards h i m- its essentially just two dudes who's super gay for each other but terrified to tell each other about the other's feelings n shit. In Dean's spare time he usually chills out well, anywhere he really wants too (he can honestly be super chill, like MORE SO than usual when Jason's around and he knows it), but he'll usually kick back and relax and listen to some music on his phone- his favorite genre is heavy metal, punk rock, or just anything rock in general mostly- he better be glad he has headphones bc Jason would probably become v e r y irritated hearing that loud music all the time, or if music doesn't appeal to Dean at the moment- he'll watch some videos instead- he doesn't do m u c h in his spare time aside from those and well, most of the times he'll work out with Jason- which even tho Dean can be loud most of the time, Jason seems to, well from Dean's perspective- he "tolerates" his presence p much. In Jason's spare time he usually just hangs out in "the back" he likes the darker areas and the much more quiet areas, usually whenever he's got spare time he works out a L O T- along with Dean, who again, this is from Jason's perspective now- Jason actually loves having Dean around to work out with, its nice in a way... Aside from work outs, he'll sometimes read some books, listen to some music of his own, orrr watch videos on his phone as well, there is ONE thing he does aside from that though... He loves to find and collect certain items that he k n o w s he could make weapons out of, at first, Dean didn't understand why the fuck Jason was collecting all this junk but he didn't dare question it, but after a long while... Jason had came out from his little area and he gave Dean a few weapons, ranging from a baseball bat to a knife- which, Dean- he actually genuinely smiled- not that shit eating grin that's usually plastered on his face but a genuine smile came from this boy, he... he absolutely loved those weapons- he treats them fondly too even to this day.

[servphims-blog]

this is gonna be a whole MESS bc its 3am but !! i rly wanted to post this now bc im already late and i didnt want to be even MORE late ! ANYWAYS hello my name’s ellie, ur local the boyz stan, 20, and from the cest tz which is … gmt+2 i think ?? this here is my child fei that i may or may not have created specifically for this rp so im still figuring her out :/ pls bear with me ! i don’t have a bio page up yet but i do have her profile right HERE and i’ll try n write some more important things under the cut c: if you’d like to plot, dont hesitate to click the lil heart and i’ll slide into ur ims – you can also find me on discord as rilakkumas#2155 if that works better for you !

OKAY SO feifei was born as the only daughter of a pretty affluent pureblood family in beijing, china. her parents, while initially over the moon because of the pregnancy, had completely different reactions once the child was actually born. while her mother held the baby close to her chest, already in love with the tiny girl, her father turned around and walked straight out the door he’d come through. after all, it was no secret that he wanted a boy – someone who, in his eyes, would be a better fit for the role of his heir

fei grows up without a father, really. he’s almost never home – most of the time he’s out gallivanting with his newest conquest, leaving his wife alone; or if he is home, he just pretends the child doesn’t exist. it hurts at first, she’s not gonna lie. young fei does everything in her power to get his attention. she tries being sweet. then she lashes out and throws tantrums every other day. then she thinks that maybe if she ignores him too, he’ll be the one to crack first. and then – she just gives up. if you asked now, she’d call herself pathetic – though only because she pities the girl who got her hopes up a million times, just to have them shot down just as many

a couple of months after her eleventh birthday, she gets two letters – one marked with the hogwarts crest, and another with the mahoutokoro one. her father insists on sending her to japan. the standard is much better, he says; and they only accept the best of the best. i will not allow my daughter to go and live with those – those – those brutes!!!!

she picks hogwarts almost immediately – if only to spite her father

not that fei doesn’t like hogwarts. quite the opposite really. at first, it’s mainly because of the fact she’s so far away from home and her parents and their controlling regimen. here she has the upper hand. she strips away the last remains of the starry eyed fool she once was, and builds herself anew – a lot more charming, and a lot more persuasive – a person fit to wear the silver-green colors of the house she was sorted in

she can honestly be pretty fake ?? the type of person to make you believe you’re best friends when in reality she couldn’t care less about you. fei learns how to change her entire personality depending on who she’s around, in order to get whatever it is she needs – so she’s almost always around people, but most of the friendships she has are superficial bc of this

horrible at dealing with her own problems/emotions !! 99.9% of the time she will ignore them until they either a) go away or b) escalate into something much worse ( it’s mostly b tbh )

very prone to escapism via anything and everything that will get her mind off her problems :/ she usually has p good self-restraint and knows her limits, but can go overboard at times

can be pretty impulsive, and doesn’t really care about any consequences that may come out of it. she can be pretty responsible i guess – but only when and if she wants to

regularly uses the prefects bathroom even though she’s not one. how? she probably talked someone into giving her all the passwords. she can be pretty manipulative – but if it gets her what she wants, then it’s worth the trouble

im probs gonna make a separate page later on, but as far as plots go ?? would absolutely love some friends for this child – anything from superficial friendships to frenemies to actual best friends ? someone who knows what fei is actually like ? slytherin squad too please and thank u ! enemies would be fun – maybe they found out how fake fei can be, maybe she only used them to get something she wanted and they found out, maybe they just hate each other from the first day in the castle ( the possibilities are endless !! ) someone who actually manipulates her for their own benefit? also fwbs bc she’d have a lot of them, exes (angst????) enemies to lovers ( my fav trope of all times ), old crushes OR current crushes – unrequited ones too ? could be fun to see fei stumble over her words and not know what to do for once. maybe you catch her in the middle of her regular bubble bath in the prefect’s bathroom ( she’s not really supposed to be there, but you won’t tell – right? right?? ), class partner that she just CAN’T seem to get along with because both of them are too stubborn and won’t admit they’re wrong etc. bUT obvi im also open for brainstorming as these are all pretty basic !

uuuuh i think thats about it ?? im on -10 braincells rn so idk if any of this makes sense and there’s probs a LOT more im forgetting BUT this will have to do for now ^v^ ily ❤❤❤

[deadmanzp]

aftg asks; questions by triquetrine

these are so interesting so i did all of them.. i want to come back after a year and see if id still answer the same! 

op is the post before this or also tagged “misc” 

neil josten: favorite/most iconic line?

first one that comes to mind I’m not sure is a favorite or iconic line? but it’s a line i think about a lot and it always hurts to read. it’s when they're at the cabin in TKM. 

“He didn’t care how much it hurt so long as he could pull Andrew closer, and he let Andrew take him apart until he couldn’t think anymore.”

that comes at the very end of Chapter 14 and gosh just the paragraph that line comes from and the paragraph before…. the fact neil thinks andrew doesnt care about him the way he cares/feels about andrew is like….. CMON MAN but also i just love the pining angst of it. i like this line especially because the line right before it mentions neil working his “bandaged fingers into Andrew’s hair”. so the “he didnt care how much it hurt” to me always carried a double meaning of 1. the physical pain he felt bc of his injuries but also 2. the pain of unfamiliarity abt his feelings towards andrew and thinking it was unreciprocal AND THAT HED HAVE TO “WARN” ANDREW like the implication.. of neil thinking abt their “relationship” possibly ending bc andrew doesnt feel the same and maybe wouldnt want to be entangled in whatever neil was feeling …… IM LIKE neil knows andrew so well and him being so sure abt this but hes like …. WRONG …. e

nathaniel wesninski: one thing you would change about the books? (plot, characters, etc)

there is very little id change about the books if at all. mainly bc while i know there are upsetting things that happen/the charas do, i think all of those things make the series really interesting to analyze and talk about. i will say a moment i hated was when neil touches andrews scars when andrew makes it clear he doesn't want neil to pry about them. i know neil offers his scars in turn when he's trying to convince andrew to let neil look over kevin but that was controlled. he let andrew touch them and find out about them of his own volition. neil touches something directly related to the trauma andrew had just experienced again when he had 0 permission to do so. while i always get mad at neil for this when i read it i still dont think id change it or get rid of it. im not really sure how id change it anyways and i think andrews relationship with his scars (and himself in general) is probably what allows him to brush it off(?)/never bring this up (plus maybe neil offering his scars was enough for andrew) but i havent thought too hard about this. but ya i remember i got rlly angry w neil the first time i read this scene and i still get mad abt it when i reread.

andrew minyard: if you could be friends with one of the characters, who would you pick?

i mean realistically i wouldnt be friends w jocks ILL BE REAL LOL and i think as much as i love the monsters, theres no way id be friends w them haha uhm but prob dan would be most realistic! maybe even katelyn tbh.. 

kevin day: if you played exy, what would your position be?

oh i think dealer! in sports i liked being able to do both defense and offense bc it made me feel i had more control over the field, like i could always do something if there were any holes

dan wilds: favorite moment/scene?

definitely the hotel reunion scene. theres so much to it; it drives me nuts!!!!! but honestly there are probably a lot of really good moments im forgetting. to me the whole series is really enjoyable and every scene has something i could say about it haha

matt boyd: song you would love to see in a live-action adaptation?

Oggghh this is so hard… esp since it takes place in 2007???? Idk.. iconic artists then i suppose ghfgkjhf BUT i think general vibes i think itd be so cool if paramore (time relevant), ptv (also time relevant), and mitski were on the soundtrack……. Ya…….. 

nicky hemmick: which made you more emotional, neil at evermore or neil in baltimore?

neil in baltimore for sure… neil at evermore i can't remember what i felt the first time i read it (maybe pain LOL bc he was doing it for andrew and i felt like riko wouldnt keep his promise) but in my latest reread i was unimpressed by it (mostly bc i think riko is boring and unimpressive). i think i mightve said evermore in the past though….. maybe... neil in baltimore is like … GOD neils emotions are so strong during all of that its really juicy haha. i think like him being angry bc he was on the cusp of having everything he couldve ever dreamed of; the desperation of wanting to fight back and get away; even just the fear of being in the same room as his father for the first time in so long... all really juicy 

aaron minyard: a character you will defend to your death?

defend…. im not sure is the word i would use and i dont think i really believe in defending any of these charas “to death” bc of how flawed and complex they are; id like to acknowledge when they did wrong. i think id “defend” any of the characters if i saw anyone misinterpreting or misunderstanding them.. theyre all really interesting even if they didnt get too much spotlight. except maybe riko. hes incredibly boring to me. and also nathan ig and any of his crew just bc there is Nothing abt them rlly...

katelyn: which minor character do you wish you could see more of?

uhhhmmmmmmmm hmmmmmm….. idk maybe… jeremy…. gjfjgkdngmdghs just bc him and kevin r so funny.. i was thinking maybe jean too but…… idk a diff kind of kevin relationship lol (yikes) (pain) but really im satisfied w jeans screen time. i think ichirou is interesting but again i think he didn't rlly need more. maybe erik actually. im interested to know what nicky is like with him :0

allison reynolds: favorite headcanon about the foxes?

actually something i recently thought abt was neil and photography. iirc? andrew gives neil a camera in the ec and i also imagine kevin eventually gets another camera too (i loved that detail when we saw his room at the nest) so i thought abt neil and kevin sharing/trading pics they take of (mainly) scenery. i imagine neil takes pics of anything he wants to remember/keep while kevin is more prone to taking pics of subjects related to some nerd history stuff (lol) so thats why they trade scenery pics mainly. but i like this small connection bc i want more to their relationship than their exy obsession and i imagine they have room for more now that riko is gone and i just like this other commonality btwn them. i think maybe they mail the developed pics to each other maybe w small descripts/notes but thats it. and i also imagine it kind of just is something that started happening.. neil and andrew r on a roadtrip and some building reminds neil of kevin so he snaps a pic and eventually sends it to kevin w some note. kevin replies 1. either a text being like that is nothing. > neil: shrugs brushes it off but figures he is welcome to send more when kevin sends his own picture back or 2. kevin simply replies back similarly w his own photo. i dont know.. maybe this goes beyond what their actual relationship would be like but i do like the idea of them just bein like… dude friends u know so i want them to have more than just exy and a traumatizing experience between them. 

as for common headcanons within the fanbase…. i do like the allison + neil haircuts thing.. although im not sure if i imagine it the same as most haha i feel neil would know how to cut his own hair from his life on the run (though theyre not Good or bad just like ok u know like passable generic w/e) i think hed definitely be tense the first couple times but he has experience w allison being close from needing to be covered up w make up after winter break so i think she would be allowed. 

renee walker: favorite non-canonical ship? (renison, jerejean, etc)

uhmm to be honest none really… im way too attached to canon to be able to dismiss any established relationships. i think kevemy (??? is that the name) is rlly amusing but i dont want them together necessarily haha i used to rlly like renison mainly bc im a lesbian and i want “main” chara wlw relationships lol but i recently read something abt how bi allison doesnt rlly sit well w some bc she outs andrew and neil during the hotel scene.. i also agree this is kinda :/ if she was bi Mainly bc i feel a lot of ppl (or at least this is what i gather from renison stuff ive seen) portray allison already being established bi? if this makes sense. i think if renison/allison realizing shes bi is a later development id feel better abt it but usually renison is already established so ya her outing them does bother me…. BUT aside from this, thinking about them as characters and what their partners (would) look like… im not sure if theyd rlly choose each other.. but i still enjoy seeing them together in art and in fic bc in the end…. im a sucker for women lol….

seth gordon: most underrated dynamic? (matt & neil, wymack & andrew, etc)

my first thought was wymack and andrew bc i rlllllyy like their dynamic especially after reading their ec stuff. i loved their first meeting (andrews terrible sandwich??!?fhdhfjd) and when andrew breaks into wymacks apartment BUT i think ppl mention them enough its not underrated. i Actually think renee and andrews dynamic/friendship is rlly underrated/overlooked!!! especially after reading the son nefes ec i love their dynamic a lot… 

some son nefes moments of them i liked:  tw // rape

renee convincing andrew to go with her to see matt after his trip to edens

how many knives do u carry / one more than u IS SO FUNNY and just andrews persistence abt fighting renee is also rlly funny to me

tw // rape : the moment when andrew asks renee if she killed her rapist/abuser that whole convo was good… 

their convo in the rain w their tea

i cant remember when this happens or rlly exaclty what was said but renee offers andrew something (some help??) and he says i dont need (w/e it was) and she says something along the lines of  i know but it wouldnt do any harm or SOMETHING like that.. i like this bc she acknowledges their abilities while showing shed still like to offer some help. im p sure she does this another time too (w neil???? or someone i cant remember maybe it was andrew again) and i remember liking it too. she has a way w words and talking (also seen in her convincing andrew to see matt)

BUT regardless of ec stuff i think their relationship/dynamic seen in the books is rlly good too. theres def enough to be intrigued by them and i always have been? so i'm reeeaallly happy son nefes exists i loved reading it..

david wymack: which ncaa team would you play for?

oh to be honest i dont rlly remember many of them but of the Three (ravens, foxes, trojans) prob trojans. i remember i even got them in a uquiz once… 

abby winfield: which character was the most realistically written?

first that came to mind was aaron actually.. i remember before when i didnt rlly like him or care abt him it was actually bc he was too “boring” to me. i always thought he had the most realistic reactions to things which is what made him boring to me amidst the ridiculousness of, well, everything in aftg lol… i still think he is really realistically written but now i dont think hes boring haha

besty dobson: how many times have you read the series?

fully i think…. only 3 times… i wish this were a higher count but i actually feel guilty everytime i try to reread it.

riko moriyama: coolest exy moment? (kevin’s last-minute point against the ravens, andrew shutting down the goal, etc)

uhhmm uhmm i def think kevin during the final game against the ravens…. hes so cool haha but i KNOW there were a lot of game moments that i thought were really cool so i cant rlly say…. oh also i love neil being defense in that game too rlly juicy wish i could pull up obscure moments bc i know i rlly enjoyed reading the games but terrible memory...

jeremy knox: which do you like reading more, domestic!foxes or chaotic!foxes?

uh i guess chaotic? not rlly sure exactly what that could entail but i do like… their chaos.. when they have fights and squabbles and stuff… this includes the high tension moments. ALTHOUGH i do like the tiny lines in the books when we see the monsters just doing like random basic everyday life stuff like playing video games or whatever. i like…. imagining them... fhdjfjshfjs… as for fic def chaos. i feel domestic is usually too softened….. 

jean moreau: favorite friendship?

oh i think this goes back to andrew and renee. but other than them… i do like neil and matts friendship.. though probably not the same as its typically portrayed 

[survivor-rotuma]

Ep. 8: “jay, I don't know who to trust anymore“ - Zest

Brianna

Okay Marie got voted out cuz Felix idoled Joey and that shit and I’m really upset about it. I think I just. Need to remain calm tho. I don’t need to freak out just cuz something didn’t go my way. I believe I’m still in a relatively good spot in the game and can still do some damage if I play my cards right. The only question is to who. The big targets now are Felix and Apollo in my opinion. How to get them out and remain safe is the question. Guess I have some thinking to do. Cya : ) 

Felix

I played an idol correctly for once in my life. This is actually the biggest gag of the century because it saved my ally and now I have at least some numbers left. Flint, Joey, and Lysandre are all numbers for me. I also think Boris is one too, but all Sumi people just rub me the wrong way. Next round will be interesting because we need to get rid of someone from Sumi because they are gaining traction quickly. Though, I doubt that people will remain loyal to that tribe alliance. I mainly want to target either Zest/Brianna/Apollo. They have got to go. This is an independent game, but I'm stuck in a position where I have to work with my old tribe. Yet, I can still gain the trust of Boris and Lysandre. I don't think I can EVER work with Apollo/Brianna/Zest. The latter two because I just don't talk to them enough. The former because I literally cannot trust his word. These three are the biggest threats to my game and they need to go. My order would now be Zest > Brianna > Apollo. My FTC could be with either Lys/Joey or Flint/Joey. All I know is that Joey is coming with me to FTC because he is the goat to end all goats.

Flint

WOW that tribal was wild. I did not expect Felix to have that many advantages. And that transparency one?! That really exposed me for flipping on our Tuai alliance. Just when I thought I couldn’t be any lower, here I am sitting in the grave I dug myself. Hope Marie keeps a slice of pizza warm for me cuz I’ll be joining her soon. 

Apollo

Ya bitch just found a motha fucking idol!!!! I’m fucking screaming!!!

zest

jay, I don't know who to trust anymore. I am a ball of stress. I want to stay in this competition. I need to figure something out. 

Felix

It is interesting to me that Lysandre chose Boris over me in the last round for immunity. To me that means he did not want me to ever win immunity in the first place. Thus, I must be a target for this tribal council which does not surprise me at all. I did, after all, just make a huge move and shook up the game so it comes as no surprise that people would begin targeting me. I do not believe that I can convince Zest or Brianna to vote my way, so there's no point in talking to them about the vote. I want to go for Apollo in this vote, but I do not know if I would have the numbers to do so. Honestly Flint can go now if he is so inclined, but we need to do something about this Brianna/Zest/Apollo alliance that I know is around. Apollo probably wants to take them to the end rather than Boris since they are major goats in this game. Maybe we should strip him of his numbers first before actually striking at him. Plus, Zest or Brianna would be a stronger pill to swallow for people to vote out. All in all, my plan remains the same though I doubt that without this immunity that I will make it much farther in this game. 

Lysandre

So the challenge is a chain reaction and I'm trying to set my list up to who I want to win vs who I Dont want to win. I mixed the Boris in at the top with the Taui folk.

Lysandre

My target for this round is Briana or Zest! And honestly even Apollo but idk about him yet. Lets see how the list challenge goes first. LysandreSo I put Felix as number two on tbe list so I cab show my trust to him and I think it worked out. ONG I FREAKING WON THIS CHALLENGE. AT final 8!!! I did that ugh my social game I love that whore. And the JURY voted for me to win it since there was a tie!! I am beyond ecstatic 

Lysandre

So winning immunity is both a blessing and a curse. It shows that I'm a little bit of a social threat as well as challenge threat and they see that now in how I was positioned on the lists (by thinking really hard about it lol). I also got the Jury's vote which says that between me and Boris they support me more which gives me more fuel to take Boris to the end of the game with me along with say Joey. I also came to the conclusion that it was Apollo and Zest who put me somewhere in the middle of their list or presumably under eachother and Boris which leads me to believe they are Sumi strong. I believe this is enough for me to try and target Zest this round. She's not playing the game for herself and she's in no way loyal to me. Apollo, however, seems to want to take me further than a few people so he can stay for now. All I have to do is cut out his ride or die Zest and I possibly take that spot. My eyes are still on Apollo since he has some sort of advantage and my eyes are on Flint who has this alliance with Brianna.. 

Lysandre

On second thought I may have to get Apollo out this round. He still has an advantage and is more of a threat than Zest. However, if he goes then Zest has to be next. My only concern is Boris and where his head is at the moment. I think it would be easier to get him to do Zest versus Apollo but if we DO vote out Zest Apollo is gonna be pissed and may turn on me. 

Flint

Well I botched another immunity challenge. That’s 3 for 3 now. No one has talked with me, and after my failed flip I’m getting paranoid I’m being voted out tonight. 

Apollo

Is Lysandre a politician? Do they think they’re Yul Kwon? Hell no! Because you’re about to get clockt in two rounds sweaty! I want them out so bad, I want them out now but I can’t.

Apollo

Idk if I’ve confessed since Marie Went  home but omg I can’t really complain about it, I’m not that mad! Lol. It’s upsetting the three amigos are still in but Marie was a bigger detriment to have in the game than Joey could ever be. I’m starting to consider working with Felix over Lysandre since I found out lysandre is in 5 alliances. And that’s more than I’m even in. BorisLysandre is amazing and i would die for them

Boris

So much is going ON. Marie was idoled out but i don't care bc I kinda wanted her gone anyway. Ive been at pride all weekend so I havent been able to be around much. Apollo is controlling as always. Lysandre and I are still a power couple. Felix is an icon. I forget flint and Joey exist sometimes. Brianna is ok. Zest is ok Jay had to threaten me to get me to confess so sorry this sucks lmao. Ill do better confessionals once pride weekend is over! LysandreSo it looks like the votes for Zest are coming in quite nicely and its going to be her. Apparently Apollo is sketched out by me and thinks I'm in the best position in the game... Ok??? You're right and all but ok??? You're too loud lmao

Felix

Alright so I hope the vote is Zest. Everyone is telling me that it is Zest or Flint. Apollo wants Flint gone. Everyone else wants Zest gone. It's a wild time. I'm just happy that neither my name nor Joey's name is being said during this round. It must mean we did something right this round to not be targeted as hard as we should be. Either way, I'll be here for another round unless I get idoled out, but that is unlikely to happen. Lys told me some interesting things today. Flint is heavily working with Brianna as a sort of duo that wants to make it to the end. This is interesting considering that Flint told me that he is the most distant with Brianna. I think Flint was lying to me, and he was just testing me with who I want out. If I had said the wrong name, then he would have begun targeting me this round. Luckily I already knew his relations with Brianna so I didn't say the wrong name. Though, that duo should be something to watch out for, though they are no present threat to me. This means that allegiances, the real ones, exist like this: Lys and I Joey and I Apollo and Zest Flint and Brianna Boris is the only one who I feel is an actual free agent in this game which puts him in a dangerous position for me. If he does decide to betray me, he can easily rally the votes against me. Though I need him at the present moment, so I cannot start targeting him. It is interesting to note however, I'm not going to stalk the idol hunt. It's too many outcomes for no rewards. Plus, I've already used three of them so I shouldn't have more. Good luck to me I guess.

Felix

Apollo is trying to vote out Flint which is still weird. He really seems to want to split the vote though which is super strange. I don't like how he is playing and I am just going to vote out Zest to keep myself safe this tribal council. Plus, she was totally @'ing me in the chat with her tribal answer which is fair enough, but that means the sooner she leaves the sooner I'll be safe.

Boris

Apollo thinks I'm still loyal to the f3 alliance of us and Zest but I personally like Felix and Lysandre more so uh oops. Felix and Lys want Zest out because shes simply just a loyal number to Apollo without any other game influence. And HONESTLY I agree so im voting Zest, but this is kinda cementing it to Apollo that im more loyal to others than him, so uh yeah Im scared !!

Flint

Tonight’s vote is a gesture to gain favor and trust back from Felix and Joey. I hate to vote for Zest but I need to prove my loyalty. But I think Felix has this game in the bag if he makes it to the end, which a lot of people are starting to realize. So it’s tough to balance a big move and lose Felix’s trust again or be considered a player that only rides Felix’s coattails and doesn’t play strategically. 

Felix

Apollo is going on and on about how Lys is secretly working the middle and that he's manipulating everyone. Let me be clear. It's obvious to me that this is what Lys is doing. I mean what else is he supposed to do? He has no Mea tribe members so he has to go and appease everyone on this tribe for a right to be in the game. Then there's Joey who believes Lys and Apollo are working together to take us both down which I don't believe. What I do believe is that Lys is putting his trust into me and is loyal to me. He's playing a fantastic game as of the moment, but I cannot get him out because he's a number for me. I need those numbers to take down Apollo. And then Boris. I just hope Lys does end up keeping me around because I'm placing a lot of trust in him.

Lysandre

So apparently there is a last minute scramble to trash my name on Apollos behalf. He revealed that I was in 5 alliances and is saying I'm a big ole threat since I was at the top of almost everyone's lists. I mean he's right but guess what baby boy I'm immune and your partner Zest soap is not. Lets see if you keep this same energy next round.

Brianna

Um so. I wake up from my 2 hour nap at 8:50 and now there’s a voting extension. Apollo told me he doesn’t know if people are voting Felix or flint. Flint tells me everyone’s name except Apollo’s was thrown out. And lysandre tells me they’re voting zest....I kind of...don’t know what’s going on....I wish Marie was here. She could’ve told me. So guess I’m voting? I don’t know. Felix? Might change in the next fifteen minutes 

joey g

So this round has been bonkers. I reached out to Lys and Felix because I needed to secure a trust going forward, but I’ve also reached out more to the Sumis as well. I really didnt want to vote zest, but felix is sorta running the show and I think that’s what Lyse wanted. Apparently its between Flint and Zest, but I cant say I feel comfortable at all

Brianna

Lysandre just told me apollo is targeting me...oop...

Brianna

Guess I’m trying to get zest out now! Lol 

Flint

I’ve heard that Tuai is using my name as a decoy which makes me really paranoid for tonight’s vote. I wish I had some security but that idol is so hard to find

[coreytravelogue]

Burnaby (Home), BC - March 27, 2020

By this point of the year I was not expecting or wanting this but then I think the same can be said for maybe 90% of the world’s population but I feel as though 2020 may be predestined for me to maybe not travel this year or to just have a harder time getting around than usual.

It started with being stranded in Newfoundland as we all know, I got back to Vancouver so that is all well and good. So how have I been since? Where have I been? Why am I providing an update if I am not traveling?

Well I write here mainly when I am traveling, I have an adventure to tell or if i am in the middle of an adventure right now and I just want to just talk it out in words on my computer.

To answer the first question in all honesty I am in decent spirits despite being in self isolation, in a way I have sort of been prepared for it for a fairly long time. There are draw backs to this whole thing to flatten the curve of corona virus but all things considered given how things have gone for many people I am pretty fucking lucky so I don’t really have any right to complain. i have about 2 weeks worth of food stored, I haven’t needed to hog any toilet paper since I have usually kept a pretty decent supply as is most of the time prior anyway and I can work from home and still collect a paycheque. The thing that sucks the most is I won’t be able to travel and honestly I have been able to travel at all this year, I guess that sort of answers the second question but it is not entirely the corona virus’s fault.

I was originally supposed to go to Edmonton in mid January to see a friend, watch a hockey game and go to the water park. I had to cancel that due to work stuff, disappointing to say the least but at least I was able to get a refund out of much of it.

I was hoping to go to Victoria in February however due to being stranded in Newfoundland i had the choice of using what leave days I had left on it or have it taken out of ‘next fiscals’ or basically take it out of my flex days off since I work an extra hour every work day in order to get a extra day off every two weeks. Suffice to say I didn’t have a flex day off in February so no trips.

There was hope with maybe going to Victoria this month but as you can tell the pandemic makes that hard which leads to what was going to be the two first big trips of the year for me.

I was planning on going to Ottawa/Gatineau during my Easter beak which I often try to make it 5 days off instead of 4 using my flex day off but at this point that ain’t going to happen. The reason why I wanted to go to Ottawa is mainly to Jayne hat statues and explore my country’s capital in a way I never did before. I have been to Ottawa a couple of times, my Uncle John used to live there and we now and then drove through Ottawa but often never to really see the sights but to either pass through or just stay at his house I never really got to see the place. I mean I got to see Kanata as a teenager but only because we went to see a AC/DC concert there which was my very first true concert.

May has often been reserved for going north; 2018 I went to the Yukon and last year I went to the Northwest Territories. While I was really hoping to go to Alaska since Nunavut is way too hard and expensive to get to, Alaska proved to be way too expensive for me as well and I was planning on going to Portland instead which would be a significantly cheaper and easier trip and still allow me to scratch something off my scratch map of the world. However with both Ottawa and Portland this pandemic has basically forced me to cancel those trips indefinitely.

Bad news is I don’t get my money back in cash, goodish news is I got credit with both WestJet and Air Canada to use for when this pandemic is lifted, that is if it is lifted before the end of the year. Even if it does that doesn’t guarantee WestJet and Air Canada despite holding a monopoly over Canadian skies and getting bail out after bail out still survives this whole ordeal.

So I have been nowhere int he last 3 months which will probably extend to the next 5 months or more. To me I think we are living in adventurous times. An adventure in that I think this is a pretty good test for humanity to re evaluate what is important in their lives right now and maybe figure out who actually has their back right now.

I won’t get political (shocking I know) but you know what in a way I am not going to lie I am actually enjoying this self isolation. Now don’t get me wrong I do not enjoy seeing friends, family and people in general lose their jobs over this pandemic, I don’t enjoy people dying over this either. However if there is one thing I have learned over the past few years it is that you can only worry about the things you can control and you have to make lemonade out of lemons because you have to get something out what you are dealt with.

Today is my first flex day in self isolation and i plan on working on stuff I purposely neglect because i have always found chores or just doing the useless shit to be more ‘important’ though I want to work on the actual stuff I am working on. What I want to work is creative stuff. The teenager version of me would be utterly disappointed with how I am these days. As a teenager doing creative shit was second nature; writing fiction dude I can write 30 pages in a Saturday (whether it was good or not is another story), AMV making bitch please I made 69 AMVs from 2000 to 2005 while most couldn't and wouldn’t even get to 10 within 10 years. Mind you whether any of my AMVs were any good is up to debate. However why was teenager Corey able to do all that? Well because he spent most of his time AT HOME. Yeah he had a part time job and school but outside of that teenage Corey had no social interaction of any kind for the most part at this point. So when I think of this self isolation bit I know teenage and even child version of Corey would have a field day with this. Easy peasy lemon squeeze and chug that lemonade! 

Looking back I feel like teenage Corey probably had less time to work with but still made the most of it. School from 7am to 3pm, work from 4-6pm, homework from 6-10pm unless there wasn't very much but that would often mean only 1 or 2 hours of actual free time and maybe Corey just wanted to game or watch a movie. 

Fast forward to me now where I get up at 5:30 am, 6:30-7:30am i bike to work, 8am to 5pm I work, 5-6:30pm I bike home. From 6:30 to 9pm have free time yet I do nothing. It is more complicated than that as I have other things and people in my life that require and deserve my time however I got full weekends to do it and yet I don’t because I fill it with often useless chores. I guess long story short is I dont feel like i have made better use of my time like I did as a kid and I feel like this self isolation thing may be a good way to force me into getting into the habit of being creative again.

So with that let the day of creating being, I got a novel and an AMV to finish. 

Stay healthy, safe and creative out there people! Shazbot nanu nanu

[ts-caymanislands]

Closing Statements

First, I'd like to address a few things.

1. Yes, receiving 10 votes may mean to some that I maybe didnt make as good as connections? In my opinion, maybe not receiving many votes people never perceived you as a threat? Yes, you can claim you were socially connected and whatever, but maybe it was just no one wanted you out bc most people felt like they could be you in the end including myself? And for that reason you had great social connections bc no one saw you as a threat so wanted to work with you? Yes, I did survive some very close calls but I don't think it was because I wasn't connected or socially "lacking." In my opinion, thats just an excuse.

2. Yes, I did initially want at least either ahrre or vilma at f5. However, as nick claims, I dont think he was the one to directly screw that over and really control those. After the mess of the nolan vote, I knew vilma had completely lost all trust in me. The reason I mainly wanted to keep ahrre or vilma in that I didnt tell them, is I knew down the line if I needed to turn on nick or tj I felt like i could work with those two much more over bryce and alex. After the nolan vote and she really started coming for me immediately, I knew that wasn't going to happen with her. Additionally, ahrre won 3 immunities, which nick cant control. I'm not dumb enough to let a comp beast make it close to the end as a shield. So, yeah I in my mind it was obviously worth the risk to take him out, instead of letting him get the chance to win more immunity. So, yeah even though I initially wanted to keep him in as strategic/social shield, that DOESNT mean I'm not allowed to change my mind because the circumstances change and him claim it was always him convincing me like he "claimed" with the nolan vote, as I do think he's exaggerating for a lot of moves he cant take full credit for. Finally, I'd just like to thank you all for the amazing experience of my first org, its been a blast. I do think in the majority of votes I was a major contributor. I also am very proud of the way I played no matter what others think. I think receiving 10 votes is a sign that I never gave up and fought to get to the end. I tried to make it as clear as possible to why I should win this game (apologies for I'm a horrible writer). This has been one of the most fun games I have ever played in my years playing online games, and thank you all for making is so. Also, thanks to the hosts for putting it together as the did an AMAZING job as I loved all the twists, challenges, etc...See you guys on the other side!

I honestly believe that I deserve to be the next sole survivor. I played this game hard the entire way through and did a lot of damage every week. I had a lot of influence and say over every vote from Final 8 to Final 3 and although this might be a bit douchey to say, I believe Daniel over exaggerated what he did. When he was ready to flip at Final 8, he told me and TJ that he only wanted to do it if we were able to keep Ahrre or Vilma until Final 5 since he wanted a shield. And so, what did I do? I convinced everyone to take them out before then. Here’s the brief rundown of how that went: Without Bryce’s vote at F8, we could not have gotten Nolan out. I did for us. At final 7, Daniel wanted to vote Bryce because he thought Vilma would use an idol and he would go. I convinced him to keep his vote the same and we powered through to get Vilma out. At final 6, Daniel wasn’t even around cause he was in the mountains. So, I came up with the idea of splitting votes to get Ahrre out and Me and TJ formed that together. At final 5, while Daniel was telling Bryce that me and TJ were a duo and that he wanted to “flush my idol”. Bryce was relaying all that information to me and me and Bryce decided that it was better to let TJ go. And so while Daniel thinks he sneakily came up with a plan that worked, I actually was wanting TJ to leave that week and THAT’S why I didn’t use the idol on him. I also voted Alex that round in case TJ had an idol himself AND I wanted to just not be a dick to TJ (which is the only 2 reasons I voted in minority that round despite knowing what was happening). At final 4, I told Daniel that I wasn’t going to vote Bryce. That’s why we decided to vote Kiler. And Bryce didn’t flip because he wanted Daniel to stay... Their connection was just so bad (retweet to when I said I was the one who brought all my allies together) that he believed Daniel and Kiler might actually be trying to get us to split votes. All in all, I believe that my social and strategic game were strong and gave me the ability to take out all the people I wanted, to keep all of my allies safe, and to ensure I was never in danger if the wrong person played an idol. And for these reasons I hope you vote for me to be your winner.

[bigbrotherorre]

FINAL EPISODE: “DENNIS IS SUCH A KING” - ALI THE REST OF THE GAME.

WEEK 13 

if someone who doesn't love me wins this week then bye bye ashvika 

annoyed that sammy nominated me because i kept him safe last week whereas i could have just as easily flipped to keeping alivia and he could've left...but more than that, i'm annoyed at his speech. i dont think he should've used "you nommed me" as an excuse bc that's lame and he was the first to nom me and i nommed him back so we were even, and then i let him have veto pick when he was nommed and i made sure he got taken off. also conversation is a two way street and i dont see him trying to make a conversation with me either, he could have just said the real reason....i love hearing about how good of a player he thinks i am.... the worst case scenario is if bryce or zeezo win, i think even if the noms stay the same that i have a good chance of staying? granted that autumn and ali don't decide to turn on me and evict me 

why is bryce spreading lies :( i didn't tell ali to nominate sammy.... 

ive made a lot of mistakes this game and there all coming at me now.. my position in the game is terrible and i can blame it on ppl playing not to their win condition or on just the wrong ppl winning comps at the wrong time, but ultimately i could have tried harder convincing ppl to see the light or to do better in challenges so ultimately its on me. feeling really hopeless this week even tho i avoided being a preveto nom i think ill be a post one if literally anyone but me wins veto. and i flopped veto (cwl). i cant wait for after the game for ali to admit that he did tell me that ashvika pushed for sammy to be nommed. order in which id vote ppl zeezo- always worked with me and if she makes it to the end she truly DID THAT ashvika- really took control of the game with her hoh win and after jose left smartly picked up the goats and became the biggest threat randy- a king love us working with/against each other throughout the game and even tho he was voted out im not one to discredit buyback winners autumn- never spoke to me but guess she didnt need to KASDHFK ali- fakest person ive ever met dennis- knows how to get to f2 at least sammy- ignores obvious facts and always makes the wrong move  but good at comps so wooh (me teas too tho...)

somehow i didnt get nommed but like so sad what the heck zeezo is going home like why is everyone so jealous that shes prettier and funnier than them :( why cant we all be her goats <3 i guess its good bc like i cant win with zeezo in the game and i can vote to keep her still, but honestly if i lose in f2 with zeezo itd still be fun bc she has had my back all game :] I AM SO SAD UGHHHH GOD HATES GAYS AND HES TAKING MY TWO WOC QUEENS BACK TO BACK. Now i have ashvika who is a queen but not my queen!! And autumn yikes hates me always :(

SORRY IVE BEEN GONE!!! I did one video confessional for Week 11 and just like never posted it lmao but I will haha and that's all behind me. But anyway I just have so many feelings. Live  night is about to begin, me and Zeezo's war is finally concluding, IM STILL TRYING TO GET MY FIRST COMP WIN, and I'm trying to protect my allies at all cost. Some cracked shit is about to go down and I'm so excited and so so glad I took a nap before this cause I'm ready for anything wooo

RANDY: WIN SAMMY: ... ALI: FAKEST PERSON IVE EVER MET MAYBE TALKS A BIG GAME AND SAYS HES SUPER NICE AND EMOTIONAL BUT SUDDENLY CAN TURN THAT OFF. HE WOULD BE A GOOD VILLAIN BUT HE ACTS NICE AND DOESNT OWN IT AND MAYBE ITS JUST BC ITS SO SOON BUT I HOPE HE CHOKES AND HAS HAYFEVER FOREVER! WHAT EVEN IS HAYFEVER??? HORSE BOY AUTUMN: NEVER SPOKE TO ME BUT NICE DENNIS: FORGOT TO PUT SOMEONE ON THE LIST, KNEW HIS WAY TO F2 AND IF HE DOESNT TAKE CREDIT FOR THINGS ICON AND ID VOTE FOR HIM.

AFTER THE TRIPLE EVICTION...

OK BUT DAT TRIPLE DOE http://media2.giphy.com/media/xUA7aViRhBQPzXNAAM/giphy.gif It was dramatic, over the top, emotional, satisfying, show stopping, gut wrenching- literally everything you want out of a triple. I... don't feel bad for Breezo lmao, not after all the messiness they've caused. But doing Ashvika dirty is literally the hardest choice I've had to make in Orre. Sis I am so so sorry. I should've thrown you a vote but you know how Randy is and you really know how Dennis is. I just--- that was something I like wasn't prepared to ever do, break Ashvika's heart. But like in my beautiful dark twisted mind? It was perfect because I knew I couldn't go to the end w/ Ash but I was never going to nominate her. So here we are rip ALSO LAB AND BREEZO ALL SITTING IN JURY??? BIIIIIIITTTCCHHHHH https://media.giphy.com/media/zcAii7T9JXezS/source.gif If you're reading this, you know I sure did say I would wipe that whole group out and send them to jury and it really did come to pass. John sure did gas all of them up to win and I sure did tell him in my Week 10 goodbye message that they were all bout to walk in behind him. So in the spirit of prophesizing, let it be known that Auli aka Ali and I will make Final 3 because we are the strategic dynamic duo y'all slept on. Like correct me if I'm wrong: we've been on the right side of all 8 "merge" votes (there's no word for like opposite of pre-jury lmao), we ain't been on block since Week 6/7 and it's now Week 14, and we've downplayed our iconicism left and right so we're the last duo standing at Final 5, and no one wants to take a shot at us. BUT YALL STILL SLEEP CAUSE THE MIST IS THAT STRONG. That's ok though! When Randy and Sammy walk into jury next y'all will see Also I'm  dead at how much jury hates Ali hahaha. Deadass he has to stay in the game for safety reasons. Like soooo many jurors wanna kill him. That's my ride or die though so I can't let that happen. Anyway I still feel like shit for obeying Randy, which hurt Ashvika, made Dennis cry, and further dragged Ali's corpse. But the good news is woooo it's Final 5 and these boys all want to take Auli to the end. So do I NEED to win this HOH? No not really. Am I still praying and pleading with God like I do before every comp? Absolutely https://media1.tenor.com/images/1a11748f0c7ce30ab4afd057fab66751/tenor.gif?itemid=5677211

Me when I shocked the nation and won HOH and finally had power in the house after 13 weeks https://78.media.tumblr.com/2a8c6d7cc298da364a847f8f9d767c7c/tumblr_opiih6Z7tB1ub3fcfo1_500.gif Me then using said power to target my baby Randy for the greater good https://media.giphy.com/media/hic9t15zsdwfC/giphy.gif And now me that I'm selling my entire family, land, soul, and wig collection to get Dennis to keep me and kill Sammy so that I'm not Ika Wonged because I know for a fact Ali would take me to F2 and Dennis would be a dumbass not to take me too. AND I ALWAYS BELIEVED IF I WENT UP A FOURTH TIME THAT WOULD BE THE TIME I GO UP ON THE BLOCK AND DONT COME BACK DOWN SO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DENNIS BE STRATEGIC AND KEEP ME https://i.pinimg.com/originals/23/53/9d/23539d4ab6c13adab50940426d73ed6e.gif

[AFTER F4 EVICTION]

WAIT WHAT HOW AM I ALIVE?? https://media.giphy.com/media/TZ388aYpsLMcM/giphy.gif AND HOW THE FUCK DID I MAKE FINAL 3??? https://yiaelxzosjw9p4bs-zippykid.netdna-ssl.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/happy-crying.gif Pray for me if I win Final HOH cause fun fact: I, the strategic legend, have no clue who to fucking take to the end and that's the biggest gag of the entire season BECAUSE I DIDN'T PLAN OUT THIS FAR GODDAMMIT AND I WISH I HAD. Ok that's not entirely true- I knew I should either sit next to Dennis or Ali because ya know contingency plans matter. BUT NOW??? Bitch ion know I just wanna win

CLICK HERE & HERE TO SEE DENNIS’ VIDEO DIARY ROOMS!

i've never seen a better reflection of the emotional rollercoaster that is my mental state than these two being filmed less than 12 hours apart jasldfa

CLICK HERE AND HERE TO SEE ALI’S VIDEO DIARY ROOMS!

okay i have lots of post finale thoughts but i need to type them up tomorrow. i just hope the jury knows how sorry I am if I ever upset them, because I love them all so much and would never want that :(

time for my post finale wrap up and.... whewie. This is so upsetting because, I just did this for all stars. Like it's looking like my track record is LITERALLY going to be 2nd 9th 2nd 2nd 2nd, I CANT COME 2ND AGAIN. I really can't take this. Here is the bigger problem though and this is why Orre will be my last game whether I win or not. I can't keep playing these games when I upset so many people. Like it honestly broke my heart yesterday hearing how much I upset people like Bryce & Ashvika, people I love SOOOOOOO much. I don't want to upset people. Like... what upset me about finale is I don't think the jurors realise that.... I didn't just upset people for the sake of it and ahhh. Honestly, I'm really upset, like not even that I'm coming second but that I upset people. So with that said, I really apologise to the jurors. I got the impression that I hurt you all so bad that you are giving me 2nd as like.... punishment? And while I hate that, if I hurt you all that bad I really owe you all an apology. Anywho, since this is definitely my last game, I've played 183 days worth of games to just come 2nd, and that's just too much. I'm too flawed of a person and player to continue playing these games and just keep coming 2nd. Like it just hurts. so yeah, i'm sad but mainly because this is deja vu. I'm so proud of Dennis for winning, he is such a sweet genuine guy and when he was complimenting me during the finale, it was the nicest thing I've ever heard and I'm so greatful. No matter my game or his, I'd be happy to see Dennis represent our season.

Can I just say... Dennis is such a king. What a kind-hearted, genuine guy. A true king.

CLICK HERE TO WATCH DENNIS’ VIDEO DIARY ROOM!

okay so I lost.... and I'm weirdly at peace with it. I know I answered the jury questions terribly and I had... some jurors that would never have it in them to vote for me and would actively campaign against me. Dennis is a king, and in a cast with toxicity and SUCH bitterness, I think he is a phenomenal representation for the season. Otherwise, I am really honoured to get Ashvika's vote, she is such a deserving POTS, and to get POTS' vote is always an honour. Autumn and Jose are amazing friends and I am so happy to have got to work with them, John is a player with SUCH potential and he is WINNING BOTS & Zeezo I'm really honoured to get her vote too! For the others, Bryce is a KING and so is Blake (they both seemed really upset by me so I hope we can be friends). Lynn I never spoke to and seems... very bitter about the season's result, but I hope she gets over it because she is also a QUEEN. Randy is a funny one and I'm starting to worry all his friend talk was just him playing into my emotional side, but he is a good egg really I know it. Sammy is a ghost king. I kinda want to end on Alivia. Alivia is a person whose personality is obviously very different to mine and the way she speaks to me and others really upsets me a lot of the time. However, her bitterness against me is understandable and I hope she gets over it, because she defines herself by anger and bitterness when she is such a funny and likable person and doesn't need to do that. but woo... to wrap stuff up, I'm so grateful for Nicholas & Julia for casting me, Owen & Emily for being amazing.... OH, I forgot what I wanted to say. Autumn is a queen, a legend and amazing. She is honestly soo soo amazing, like... someone I really admire and see as a rolemodel? she is inspirational, a queen and a legend. Dennis is the nicest, most well intentioned guy ever SO sweet and really just a genuinely nice guy. I have made lasting friendships with some members of this cast and I'm so happy. so yeah.... i'll probably do another one of these in like a day or so, but if not.... ali out woo

we love coming to jury and being told about my ""showmance""".... wanna die jadfkl. my only showmance was to snakery, my way of life. blake was robbed but also is a broccoli. last words? autumn and dennis are my faves, best F3 ever.

FINAL CAST ASSESSMENT