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foxymoxynoona · 1 year

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Tell Me What Changed Part 10 A

Banner and lines by the talented @awrkive

Summary: Alex and Jungkook have been best friends since childhood –actual best friends. She is NOT in love with him, for real, and wishes people would stop assuming that. Why does no one question if he’s in love with her? Huh? But it might have to do with his successful fuckboy status, while Alex is very much… not that. Which is fine and doesn’t matter! Until Jimin’s impending wedding leaves her eager for a date and willing to put herself out there, and Jungkook can’t believe what happens next.

Fuckboy Best Friend JK x OC

CW and tags: fuckboy behavior, jealousy, pining, heartbreak, angst, bad language, explicit sex, sexy photos, alcohol, f2l, who knows what else

Read on AO3 here or below cut

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This chapter is split into two parts, make sure to read 11B before you go onto chapter 11!

Jungkook had seen the venue that morning. He was wearing a tux. He’d been along for the ride emotionally for the whole planning over the last year. It wasn’t like he didn’t know going into it that this wedding was the fanciest thing he would ever be at. But still, there was something overpowering about the event when it was finally time.

Or maybe he was nervous about other things.

No. No, it was the wedding, that was all.

He fidgeted with the cuffs of his shirt in his jacket sleeves as he, Jimin, and the other groomsmen waited in a lavishly decorated hallway for In’am to descend so Jimin could walk her into the ceremony, one of the customs In’am had wanted to preserve of Egyptian weddings.

They had already taken pictures a couple of hours ago, already caught on film when Jimin had seen In’am in her wedding dress for the first time looking like a goddamn princess, that was the truth. The white and gold, the diamonds, the elegant fit, the graceful way In’am always had of moving, it left Jungkook wondering not for the first time if he’d been casually chilling with a true princess all this time. Jimin cried. Jungkook almost cried because his friend was crying. In’am glowed. It was nice to see your friends so happy.

Because of that, Jungkook had expected her appearance this time to be unremarkable. It was not. Jimin teared up again. He accused In’am of getting more beautiful in the last hour. In’am smiled and tenderly touched his face.

Jungkook cleared his throat and looked away at the intimate gesture. His whole body felt like a bag of bees. Nerves. He better not fuck up the wedding. That was all he was worried about. Seriously. Nothing else. That’s why it felt like he was moving through water with every wedding thing they did today, the ticking echo of a countdown clock in the background making the hairs stand up on the back of his neck. He just didn’t want to fuck up their wedding. Honest to god truth.

There was nothing else to be nervous about.

The wedding event had control of two giant ballrooms, one for the ceremony and one for the reception. Jungkook offered his arm to Ina’m’s younger sister –whom he had not slept with, just to be crystal clear– and followed along behind Jimin’s brother and In’am’s older sister down the central aisle. The sea of quiet chatter disappeared as a string quartet played something Jungkook couldn’t recognize now. He was focused on not stepping on his partner’s dress, but also he was scanning the faces.

She was here. She’d been at In’am’s henna night. He’d checked her instagram feed earlier because she was posting again but it was still just random cats and a fat squirrel terrorizing her dad’s bird feeder –which he sympathized with Baba more about now that he and Namjoon had their own squirrel problem. Nothing had been more gratifying than when he’d greased the pole and they’d watched through the window as the fuckers slid helplessly back down to the ground.

Greased the pole as in he put crisco on the bird feeder hanger, not… not that pole… that had nothing to do with squirrels obviously…

His thoughts were scrambled. He wasn’t seeing her but there were so many people. Hundreds of people. And it was hard to see everyone because the lighting was all fancy, shining a spotlight on the wedding party as they paraded down the aisle between the birch branches strung with fairy lights. Yes, he knew they were birch branches because there had been a whole thing about it. There had been a whole thing about every single detail of this wedding. If he ever got married, he did not want it to be this way.

But Jimin and In’am seemed happy despite all the battles with their family and that’s what mattered. It was easy to smile at them as they took their positions in front of the officiant. His work was done for now except to stand there and look handsome and happy for them, so he went back to scanning the elaborately decorated room for a single face while trying not to look like he was doing exactly that.

She was here. She had to be here.

He saw May first actually, next to Minxi who had brought her as her +1, and Rebekah, and then Alex! Wedged in between Rebekah and Sabina, a dip between her two taller friends. She was having to lean this way and that to see in front of the taller people in front of her. She was short! She should have sat close to the front, or on the aisle! He almost didn’t recognize her at first because she had a haircut. Bangs. Other than that, he couldn’t make out much about her from this distance but she was here and relief settled around him.

Now he could relax and enjoy the wedding. The wedding was going on, and Alex was here, so everything was fine. He just hadn’t seen her in so long! Not since the arcade, except when he had waved as she she drove away for Thanksgiving with Hoseok’s family.

Where, rumor had it, she had broken up with her boyfriend.

A whole ass two and a half weeks ago during which Jungkook hadn’t heard from her, and had been too chicken to ask anyone else to confirm what he thought May’s texts meant. No one else had said anything, but maybe no one else knew anything yet? Or they just weren’t telling him? It was fucked up, people should tell him that kind of thing without him having to embarrass himself by asking!

It wasn’t like Jungkook was just sitting around waiting for gossip though, he really had been busy, thank fuck. It kept him from being able to just sit around waiting for her call –not that he would have! Obviously! Just for her to say what? If he had anything to do with the breakup? Or if the end of that relationship at least meant they could be friends again, even if the breakup had been nothing to do with him, even if she just didn’t return his feelings? He felt like being humble about the possibility rather than admitting his hopes might make it more likely to be true. If he was humble about it, maybe that would make the better thing true.

She hadn’t dumped another guy for him, had she?

Had she?!

Was he just her go-to excuse for getting out of tough situations? She’d used the her grandma dying and her dog dying too many times, so ‘My friend is in love with me’ was her backup?

So no, no he had not just been sitting around waiting for her, even if his brain had found plenty of time to wonder and worry and panic in between.

Work had been busy for the holiday shopping season. He and Namjoon had tried to do some late fall house things instead of paying someone else to do it, like cleaning the gutters. There had been lots of last minute wedding things to do, and emotional support to lend Jimin and In’am, and a bachelor party last weekend that had taken two days to recover from. Plus he was an uncle now! Jinhyung’s baby was small and kinda weird looking but cute too, and he’d gone by a few times to visit or drop things off because his mom asked him to.

See! So much going on! He had not just sat around thinking about Alex and if she was okay, and if the breakup had been really upsetting, and who was buying her ice cream, and whether he had anything to do with it. May wouldn’t tell him shit except for her cryptic out of the blue text: bye hoseok barely knew ye

Jimin and In’am shuffled around to sing the contract –a sweet one they had written together and read out now like personal vows, meshing wedding traditions in a way that Jungkook admired partly because they did it despite their families. Families shouldn’t have a final say.

Although maybe sometimes families should step the fuck up and say something if they noticed their son was in love with his friend; they could like, give him a nudge or something and help him figure it out sooner–

Whatever. His smile was sincere as he watched two people he loved take a moment to celebrate this official, legal, spiritual, and familial merging of their lives in front of hundreds of people, many of whom they barely knew. But they were happy. Different people liked different things. Different people took different paths in life.

His gaze drifted out to the audience again. Would Alex cry at something like this? She hadn’t cried at Namjoon’s wedding but that was a long time ago and she hadn’t liked the bride. He didn’t think she looked like she was crying. He couldn’t tell from the distance. Was she looking at him?! Or the couple getting married in front of him? He straightened his shoulders and stretched his neck and smoldered, just in case.

His attention returned to Jimin and In’am as they exchanged the rings, simple gold bands, their eyes shining brighter than any diamonds. In’am glowed when she looked at Jimin. He couldn’t see Jimin’s face but he could feel the same glow emanating from his posture. They loved each other deeply, exactly the kind of love you hoped for your friend. Jimin deserved that, and so did In’am. They were two of the best people he’d ever met.

Oh fuck he was crying! So much for looking cool. In’am noticed and smiled, which made him laugh awkwardly and lift a hand to wipe a tear, at which point he heard a sob from Taehyung in front of him.

“Are they crying?” Jimin asked and looked over his shoulder and laughed through his own tears. The bridesmaids were fine, but the groomsmen were crumbling as In’am’s brother took a deep gasping breath amid a stream of tears. In’am’s father, a big burly man with a stern face at all times, coughed and then loudly blew his nose. It earned a laugh at least in the near vicinity.

“Why aren’t you crying yet?” Jimin jokingly asked his brother.

“I’m in shock she married you,” JImin’s brother answered and In’am laughed, Jimin laughed. Jungkook thought the laughter in the ceremony was one of the most important parts. The joy made the ceremony even more personal. Who cared that there were hundreds of semi-strangers watching you, if you could embrace laughter even in the height of an emotional moment like this? That’s the only way he’d ever make it through something formal like this. Only with someone he could laugh with.

Ahem.

The ceremony continued despite the brief pause. It felt simultaneously an eternity and too short.

Jimin and In’am walked back down the aisle to cheers. Jungkook escorted In’am’s sister back, trying not to make it obvious he was looking at Alex when he passed but May had a shit-eating smile anyway.

Jungkook was glad now that they’d already taken the wedding party photos and he didn’t have to roll right into that, but Jimin and In’am had some to take with their parents and immediately family so there was still a break before they’d do their grand entrance to the wedding party.

“Want to go sneak and say hello?” Taehyung asked with an elbow in his ribs.

“Double entrance?”

“You got something against DP?”

Jungkook snorted. How strange to not be in the gutter with Taehyung right now! The event organizer shouted after them not to wander off but Taehyung just kep walking; Jungkook promised her they were just going to get drinks and would be back before Jimin and In’am. She ran this thing with an iron fist and he was afraid of landing on the wrong side of her.

Jungkook would not have known where to go in the mob of guests moving from ceremony ballroom to the bigger reception room, but Taehyung seemed to know exactly where he was going. So Jungkook stuck close as they wound their way through the crowd, around the gloved waiters circling with hors d'oeuvres on silver platters, past the open bars opening under the judgmental glares of the contingent of In’am’s family who had lost the bid for a dry wedding. Jimin and In’am were pretending to pay for it so as not to start a war between the families but secretly it was Jimin’s parents who had insisted wines, beers, and champagnes must be available or it wasn’t a proper celebration.

Their group had curled around a standing table in the “mingling” area of the ballroom, packed in among big vases of more birch trees so that it was a bit dangerous to get anywhere without running face-first into a sharp stick.

Alex had her back to him, the table awkwardly high in front of her, which May seemed to be mocking her about. They all had drinks; Jungkook didn’t understand how they had escaped the ceremony hall so fast but his sense of time was all fucked up today. She had something in a martini glass and lifted it delicately from the too-high table but he couldn’t see her sip it. Even if she’d been facing him, he might have been too distracted by the way her burgundy dress clung to her body. Was that fucking velvet?! Her hair was down but curled, an unusual look for her; she always complained it didn’t hold curl and he wondered if she’d had it professionally done. She’d clearly dressed up. Damn, the dress was so fitted to her body–

On second thought, he grabbed Taehyung’s arm and said, “Hey, I’m going to get a drink, want anything?”

“Nah, line is too long.”

Jungkook didn’t care. Velvet, was she really wearing velvet? Had he seen that right? Did he care about velvet? Apparently he did.

He turned tail and ran towards the bar in the far corner, but Taehyung was right that the lines were too long and now he didn’t want to actually be gone that long. So when a waiter walked by with white wine on a tray, he took one of those and doubled back and this time made himself continue forward towards the cluster of his friends even as he felt his heart start to race.

Maybe joining the table next to Alex was a stupid move, but it was the natural entrypoint to the group, so he tried to keep his attention instead on May and Minxi. They looked fine, casual, but not really close so if you didn’t know they were girlfriends you might not guess it. Was that on purpose or were they just not big on PDA? This was the first time Minxi had brought May to something; he hadn’t been around to hear her introduce May as her girlfriend. He wondered what had been more surprising, the girlfriend or that the girlfriend was Alex’s sister–

Yeah, who cared about them. Alex looked up at him with a little squeak, because of course she did, he was suddenly right beside her, and when he looked down at her he did first notice that she was wearing makeup and looked really pretty nice, he noticed that first. Her eyelashes looked really big. But something else also big caught his eyes, right down the low v of her cleavage; she even had a gold necklace with lots of little dangly things to make sure your eye went right down the front of her dress. As if you wouldn’t notice it on your own.

“You look like plum wine,” he blurted out in an attempt to not say something worse. “Your eyelashes are nice.”

Alex stared for an eternity (one second) and then snorted right into a laugh. An Alex laugh. The most familiar laugh to him in the whole world and something inside of him healed just a smidge. She was laughing at him. Fuck, he’d missed her laughing at him. Endeared by the idiot she knew he was. Accepting of it.

Was he reading too much into a laugh? Maybe.

“Hey, babe, your eyelashes look great too,” May said to Minxi. “Best eyelashes in the room.”

“Yours are ok,” Minxi returned, to May’s gasp, and Alex explaining to Jungkook, “The best part of this whole coming out thing is watching someone finally give May the shit she deserves. Boys were always too afraid of her, it was boring.” She sounded so casual that for a second Jungkook could believe the last six months hadn’t ever happened. It was just Alex, the same Alex as before except really fucking fancy right now. Fancy Alex. He wanted to pet her. Old Jungkook would definitely have pet her like a dog and she’d have pushed him away probably and he’d have teased her because why did she wear a dress like that if she didn’t want people stroking her–

Damn, it was going to be really hard not to touch that dress. It was begging to be touched. Right down her back, right over her ass–

Alex caught his stair and grinned, “You like the sleeves?” She raised an arm and flapped it, showing how the fabric fluttered.

“Um… yeah, it’s nice.”

That seemed to have been the wrong answer; she glanced at him and looked a little sad, he thought? He couldn’t fucking tell. He couldn’t pretend to tell. Never in his life had he felt both so eager to understand what she was thinking and so hopelessly disconnected from her. Looks, gestures, words might all mean different things now than they used to. Or maybe they’d always meant different things than he’d understood because he’d always just been stupid and wrong and believed it was true when she would say for the hundredth time that obviously she was not in love with him.

A tray of food appeared briefly in front of them and Jungkook grabbed whatever it was without looking and popped it in his mouth. Chewing gave him an obvious excuse to not say something; now he worried he looked weird to be in a conversation with just these three instead of the whole table, like he’d specifically come here for Alex’s attention. He hadn’t! (He had.)

“For our wedding, I think we’ll give some people a Minus One,” Taehyung said, gesturing to Sabina, to whom he had proposed a week ago. “So like five people get to choose someone to disinvite from the wedding.”

Sabina covered her face and sighed, “You stole that joke from Twitter, babe…”

“What?! I would never!”

The awkwardness of it made everyone laugh but Taehyung didn’t look bothered at getting caught, just sipped the champagne Sabina must have already snagged for him. Namjoon booed Taehyung and then looked at something on Rebekah’s phone, and then nudged Yoongi’s shoulder to get him to look as well.

So Alex had been hanging out with Yoongi at the table. Maybe they’d even been sitting near each other at the ceremony. Jungkook hadn’t bothered to look for anyone but her. He glanced at her, curious how that had gone, if she was as bothered as she had expected to be to attend without a date… as she seemed to be missing… He scanned the room just in case Hoseok actually was here, just getting Alex a drink or something. But she already had a drink, which she lifted and sipped again. And spilled a little on her chest. Jungkook pretended not to notice as she dabbed at it with a cocktail napkin. He’d do it for free….

“Um, how’s work?” she asked. It took him a second to realize she was talking to him, but she had to be because Minxi and May were suddenly whispering about something else and then May dragged Minxi off towards something and it was just the two of them standing there now on this side of the table.

“Yeah. Uh, yeah, it’s good, it’s busy. Holiday season. How’s your um, phone plan working for you?”

She snickered, “It’s, you know, a little more expensive than I was paying before.” He smiled too and looked away.

“Yeah, well… it’s uh… sixteen full price frappuccinos a month?”

“Please tell me you aren’t drinking sixteen frappuccinos a month–”

“Without a discount? Are you insane?”

They shared a smile. Uncomfortable but trying. Namjoon and Taehyung laughed loudly at something and they both glanced over but Jungkook hadn’t heard what it was and didn’t really care.

“My brother had his baby,” Jungkook contributed, worried that because she had turned, Alex would say something to pull herself into that other conversation and free herself from him.

“Yeah, I know! He’s so little!”

“Oh, you knew?”

“I haven’t gone to see him yet but mom did and took a lot of pictures.”

“Yeah he’s really little… I mean, he doesn’t do much yet.”

“He’s like two weeks old,” Alex pointed out.

“Yeah, I know! But you said you hadn’t met him yet, so I just thought I’d uh, tell you.”

Alex was grinning and he felt like she might be laughing at him. Her question felt too polite, “Do you like being an uncle?”

“No, that’s what I’m saying, he doesn’t know I’m cool yet. He kind of just thinks I’m another person to puke on.”

“I was going to say you have to wait twenty-one years before you can be the cool uncle and puke together but you’ll be like fifty so maybe that’s not really the cool uncle anymore–”

“I won’t be fifty. I’ll be forty-seven, thanks,” he corrected. “Don’t age me up, old lady.”

“Listen here, when I was your age I was…” Her eyes rolled to the high ceiling as she pondered. “I don’t know, eating ice cream and ragging on my sister for dating my friend without telling me?” She always did that when he called her old, say whatever she’d been doing ‘when she was his age’ two weeks ago. Some things never changed apparently.

It gave him a dose of hope.

“Oh yeah. Yeah.”

“Heard you knew about that before me,” she prodded.

“Yeah but um… we weren’t talking and anyway I think that’s the kind of secret you keep… I’m actually really good at keeping secrets.”

“Yeah even from yourself I guess?”

“I… guess… yeah…” Was she jokingly referencing his feelings? Right here? Before they’d even drank alcohol?!

But he couldn’t be sure, because instead she asked, “How did you find out? She wouldn’t tell me.”

“Oh, I ran into her in a gay club.”

“Oh, you frequent gay clubs now?”

“Uh, not for me,” he quickly assured her. She looked like she wanted to ask more, but Taehyung leaned across the table and said, “Jimin called me, we gotta go back.” Which annoyed Jungkook because he was kinda in the middle of something– but obviously he had to go. Obviously his friend’s wedding was more important than him slowly thawing the ice between him and Alex. Obviously.

Maybe it was better. He didn’t feel on his game. He was flustered in a way he hadn’t expected, even though she was laughing at his jokes, but he wasn’t sure he really trusted it. Maybe she was just being polite. Or if she thought he was funny but just in the haha you’re my dopey friend way. Which he would accept, if that was it! If she just was going to ease back to being his friend again, all right! That was better than nothing! Maybe it had to be that because despite seducing a hundred women (ok it was nowhere near a hundred but a guy had a reputation to uphold), he didn’t have any real idea about how to seduce Alex.

Not that he was trying to seduce her! Or, well, sorta. If she was single. And into that. Into him. If she wanted to be seduced. By him.

Fuck, he felt so awkward because she just looked at him like she was waiting for him to say something –or, worse, waiting for him to fuck off! He couldn’t tell! Was he interfering–

Oh shit, was Alex here cruising to pick someone up?! A not him someone? That could explain the dress! She never wore something that long and form-hugging and tit-attention-grabbing! Ever!

But even if she’d been wearing a grocery bag, he’d probably be this nervous because A.) a grocery bag could rip and then she’d just be naked right in front of him and more honestly B.) for the first time in their lives she knew he was into her at the same time she might be single.

A cold ball of dread rotated in his gut as he followed Taehyung back to join the rest of the wedding party in front of the ceremony room again.

He didn’t appreciate it when Taehyung nudged him, “Eh?”

“Eh what?”

“You two looked like dweeby college kids checking each other out at a party.”

“Shut up,” Jungkook scoffed and shoved his shoulder but it just made Taehyung laugh and Jungkook wished Taehyung knew something he didn’t. Like his friend was comfortable teasing him because he already knew things would work out ok. Jungkook didn’t know that. He didn’t know fucking anything right now except that Alex looked really pretty and he wanted to pet her dress.

On second thought, he asked, “She broke up with Hoseok, right?”

“I don’t know, I wasn’t there, you should ask her.”

Jungkook narrowed his eyes at Taehyung’s smug grin. But still, it made him a little hopeful, because yeah, he didn’t think Taehyung would be teasing about that if he knew for sure Jungkook had no chance. Though why Taehyung would know if Jungkook had a chance escaped him, so probably Taehyung was just being a smug shit because his love life was already settled. Lucky him.

“Why did you call us back so soon?” Jungkook asked as they reached Jimin and In’am.

“She wants some more pictures,” Jimin tattled.

“He wants some more pictures,” In’am corrected and Jimin’s shit-eating grin made that clearly the truth.

Taehyung joked, “Yeah you pulled us away just as Jungkook was starting to twirl his hair and flutter his eyelashes at–”

“Fuck off, I was not.”

“Language,” In’am scolded, tossing her head towards her younger sister, who rolled her eyes nearly out of her skull.

“I know how to say ‘fuck’, In’am.”

“You better not!”

Jimin just backhanded Jungkook playfully in the stomach and suggested, “Hey maybe don’t wait so long this time? Someone might move in.”

“Yeah, I know, she looks really nice tonight.”

“So tell her that–”

“Hey I don’t need anyone’s help seducing anyone,” he lied. “I don’t need the advice of anyone here–”

“Ah, I didn’t realize you were just going for quick seduction. I thought you were wanting more longterm, like uh…” Jimin playfully gestured between himself and Taehyung, and Jungkook got the message. The married guy. The engaged guy.

He just scoffed, “Focus on your own wedding, my man, you haven’t even made it through the dinner yet.”

“OK but we are legally married so we could just run away if we want to,” In’am suggested, which made Jimin laugh and wrap his arms around her.

“We’re not running away.” At her frown, he grew a little more serious and said, “Well, if you need to, signal to me and we’ll go.”

“Yeah?”

“Promise.”

It was kinda fucking romantic and Jungkook felt like maybe he should be taking notes…

The music started down the hall and even though he knew it was coming, it startled Jungkook out of his fluster about Alex. Various drums and a horn started first, and he could see the saxophonist though not hear it over the pounding of the drums. He wondered if hotel guests could hear this all the way into the main reception area and would wonder what was going on, though it felt obvious to him something joyous was happening.

A woman’s voice ululated, the distinct sound instantly capturing Jungkook’s attention as she beckoned them all to follow her down the center of the musicians towards the reception hall as four belly dancers took up place ahead of her to lead the way. Their costumes were sparse and shiny and tasseled and the way they moved their bodies was mesmerizing. They were working, probably off limits to a scoundrel like him, but maybe in another timeline Jungkook would have tried his luck with one of them. Probably one of the younger ones but hey, the two older ones might be cool too.

But tonight Jungkook’s thoughts were held by one woman in particular, and the suggestion of the same softer, fonder, longer-lasting thing that glowed in Jimin’s and In’am’s faces. She looked like a queen again as she began to slow dance forward, swaying, moving her arms, flower bouquet raised like a beacon. Beside her, Jimin looked like a fucker in love, eyes all sparkly, what you could see of them above his wide, besotted grin as he held In’am’s other hand and danced with her along the procession. It helped that Jimin had always been a good dancer with a natural grace. He looked right at home with In’am in this procession, surrounded by voices singing in a language Jungkook couldn’t understand.

Taehyung shrugged and grinned at Jungkook as they doubled up with the bridesmaids again to follow, but the movement was slow, and there was nothing so formal as holding hands or dancing in doubles. Everyone roamed this way and that along the slow progress, joining the singing or shouting at times. The music moved through his arms and legs, so Jungkook felt pretty in tune with it –only for a moment did he feel self conscious when they entered the reception hall with all the music and shouting and dancing and he immediately spotted Alex, right where he’d left her, watching the whole thing.

She turned away when she saw him, but it was just to take Rebekah’s hand and dance with her, like most of the guests were doing. In a way it made him feel like they were dancing together. At least they were in the same party, the same celebration. Did she think this was cool? Would she want this much noise and attention made about–

OK, he was not going to think about Alex and weddings before he’d even gotten to really talk to her! Besides, he didn’t think she would want that much attention. But maybe she did? Turned out there were a lot of things he didn’t know.

Well, he’d know long before they got to that point. If they got to that point! Oh god, marriage?! He just wanted to rub her velvet ass!

Ok, no, he wanted more than that. A lot more than that. Inclusive of that.

Thank god the drums were loud enough to drown out his panic again. He had an image to uphold. Just because he was nervous seeing Alex again for the first time in so long didn’t mean he needed to get ahead of himself. Step one was just to convince her to let him back into her life. That was the goal for this evening. Be Alex and JK: Friends Forever again.

Alex had prepared to feel bad for Jungkook and Taehyung that they’d be stuck sitting up at tables near the front, but then it turned out they were at the same table as her after all. Not next to her though; her seat had her between Namjoon and Sabina. She wondered if that was reflective of when she and Jungkook had not been talking. They’d separated them. And sure they could have just ignored the seating chart but for some reason no one did. They sat at their assigned seats at their round table and fidgeted with the water glasses and silverware and little cardstock nametags. They caused a ruckus at their table as they got situated with their drinks and appetizers, fighting over whose knife was whose, and damn it felt good to be back among her friends, even if her dumb sister was there too. They cheered the loudest at Taehyung’s best man speech, and the additions Jungkook made when he crashed it, that set both of them and Jimin off crying just like they had in the ceremony.

Jungkook looked so cute when he cried. His nose and eyes got so red and his pout gained strength. The contrast of it was just so funny because he obviously looked handsome as shit in his tuxedo but then his little baby eyes were flooding his pout like he hadn’t got the color milk cup he wanted.

Damn he cleaned up well. So well. So well he looked like he belonged in this kind of high-dollar, elegant, sophisticated world that Jimin and In’am had invited them into for their wedding. Alex had known In’am came from money but she did not realize Jimin did as well, and honestly the whole wedding was fucking bonkers. Alex had felt overdressed until she got here and now worried she was underdressed. Her dress was simple, floor-length, a-line, faux-wrap, flutter sleeves, honestly the fanciest fucking thing she’d ever worn, but not elaborate the way so many of the other women were dressed with their bright colors and sparkling jewels. There was so much gold in this room right now but her only gold was the little necklace her mom had given her for her birthday a few years ago and earrings she had borrowed from May. Her dress wasn’t actually an expensive one. She’d taken a chance on one of those online websites that seemed too good to be true, but the thing had fucking delivered. She felt pretty.

Pretty enough to get noticed? Maybe so…

Maybe it was just the glow carrying over from In’am’s henna night, which she had danced her face off at, and stayed up all night talking with more of In’am’s friends and sisters and cousins than she had met before, and just basked in the joy and love and cultural tradition. It made her a little sad her own family wasn’t more traditional. She’d said as much to her mom, who had threatened to whack her with the newspaper after apparently complaining a little too much growing up about the ways in which they were. But Egyptian traditions were so cool! Her mom had whacked her on the arm.

She just found the wedding magical and overwhelming, way more than she had expected to, since her visibility into the planning of it had been all the stress and drama. She hadn’t understood the true scale of it, even after the engagement party. The one where she had asked Jungkook to come as her date and he’d so emphatically turned her down.

And here he was, dateless, just like he had wanted.

And here she was dateless too, but actually it wasn’t so bad. It left her free to snicker into her napkin every time Namjoon made a quiet, bitter comment under his breath during the speeches that accompanied dinner. He wasn’t serious; clearly he was doing it for laughs, and it was working, earning him lots of laughs from her and Rebekah on his other side and Yoongi on the other side of her. Yoongi who was oddly here without his fiance.

Ok, maybe Alex was exaggerating her laughter a little. Because Jungkook kept glancing over when she laughed, and also she just wanted to be clear to everyone that she didn’t have a date because of her own choice. She’d had a wonderful boyfriend who had been fully prepared to escort her to this wedding.

And then she’d dumped him in the airport. Not her best moment. But so it happened, and now she was single at this wedding.

And here was Jungkook too, without a date, not yet latched onto anyone else.

She didn’t want to seem as pathetically eager for his attention as she was. She leaned on her friends for strength. It led her to do other stupid things besides laughing too loud and drinking too much champaign too early in the evening and accidentally, in a moment of messing around with Namjoon, flinging a spoonful of rice onto the floor. Not her fault! Namjoon’s! He seemed unusually playful too. It was his fault.

She worried she was being too loud and annoying.

She needed to do something less obvious. Less desperate-seeming. Less Jungkook-attention-seeking.

So in a fit of bold stupidity, after a truly fascinating performance by the quartet of bellydancers who had led the procession in, when they ran through the tables passing out jingly scarves to encourage guests to come dance with them and Sabina grabbed Alex’s arm, she went. Why not? Get away from the table, away from trying not to make eye contact with Jungkook, look bold and brave and single ready to mingle just in case, you know, anyone was watching or something.

Alex tied a jingly scarf around her hips and attempted to bellydance in the middle of the dance floor.

“I can’t move my hips like this,” Alex giggled to Sabina, clutching her arm as the bellydancers tried to lead them.

“You can,” Sabina insisted, taking her arms so they danced facing each other, which helped Alex drown out the knowledge she was bellydancing in the middle of a wedding where most people were not. Granted, it was a crowd on the dancefloor doing this, and others were dancing at their tables, and she didn’t feel like there was really anyone paying attention to her but still. “Wiggle like you are getting fucked!”

The laughter from Alex was nearly a shout as she gave Sabina a playful shove, “That’s not right! That’s what you look like?” Despite Sabina’s elegance and beauty, these movements didn’t come natural to her either; she was sort of cute and stiff with her gyrations. Alex watched one of the bellydancers –who was actually very close to her own body type! That was cool!-- and tried to move her hips and shoulders the way the professionals did. All sizes could look good belly dancing. Theoretically.

She was sure it wasn’t working. But actually it was really fun and playful to try, and the jingle of the scarf did make her feel a little sexy about her attempts. And even if she looked silly, all right, who fucking cared? She didn’t have to dance to the beat or impress anyone, it wasn’t about that. This was new Alex, Alex 3.0, Alex who did what she wanted and enjoyed herself and celebrated the love of her friends unabashedly and tried new things with limited fear and didn’t give a shit what other people thought about her and what she wanted, Alex who went after the things she wanted in life. Alex who surrounded herself with people and things and goals that let her feel like enough.

Alex who was actually kind of digging this belly dancing thing. Maybe she should take a class or something? She was kind of feeling this! When the dancers moved through all of them and she found herself surrounded by happy, joyful, beautiful women, she felt that same tidal wave lifting her as she had at the henna night.

Yeah. This was going to be a good night. She could feel it through the drumbeat echoing in her bones.

Catch me if you can, she thought in Jungkook’s direction, trying not to look over at him. But also she wouldn’t make it hard. But also she wanted to feel the effort.

“I’m going to tie this on Namjoon,” Alex said to Sabina. “Let’s get everyone up now?”

“I refuse to give this to Tae, he will keep it!”

Alex wished she felt confident yet to go up to Jungkook and tie the scarf around him. Soon, she thought. I hope. She glanced at her phone as they sauntered back to the table. Barely 6pm. But not yet, she grinned, because the night was just beginning, and Alex had come dressed to party, so party she would.

“Namjoon! Dance!”

“Whaa? No… I’m finishing my food.”

“Get up, you oaf, your turn to shake your hips. It’s your friend’s wedding, don’t be a spoilsport.”

He sighed and stood up as if he didn’t have a choice. Most people were done eating now. The dinner music was still going as people finished their meals, but the belly dancing seemed to signal a transition to the dancing part of the evening.

“Hey, when’s the cake?” Taehyung asked. “I want to make Jimin laugh when he cuts it with the sword.”

Rebekah gave him a look and prodded, “Shouldn’t you know? Aren’t you one of the groomsmen running this thing?”

“Oh shit, no, they don’t tell us anything,” Taehyung laughed. “They just tell us to stand places, look pretty, and make sure Jimin doesn’t break his nose again.”

“It looks good, though, right? It healed nicely,” Jungkook quickly insisted.

“He feels guilty, it was his fault,” Yoongi explained to all with a snicker.

“It was not!”

Taehyung wrestled the scarf out of Sabina’s hands despite her protests and insisted as he shoved it against Jungkook’s scarf, “It was. Now dance your penance. Let’s see how many fish you catch.”

“Nah, man, I’m not fishing tonight,” Jungkook said with the air of a designated driver. Alex’s head tilted. What… did that mean? Was that good or bad? Related to her or not? Was he thinking of a +1 he didn’t get to bring or… had he sworn off sex or something?! This might complicate things…

May leaned around and stole the scarf and turned to Minxi with a gleam in her eyes, despite Minxi’s adamant shake of her head and announcement, “I don’t dance.”

“For me?”

“Privately.”

“Yeah, me too, I only dance privately these days,” Jungkook agreed as if their conversations were connected.

“Oh yeah? For who?” Taehyung demanded.

“You snails are too slow, I’m going to dance, goodbye!” Alex shouted, and grabbed Rebekah’s hand, and fled to the crowd of the dance floor to escape. Even though she’d eaten so much at dinner she felt like puking. Better not to do that right in front of Jungkook, yeah?

Jungkook had lost sight of Alex. Easy to do since she was so short. He ought to have tied a balloon to her wrist –a joke he had made many times over the years, at concerts and amusement parks. She had reacted about as you’d expected: offended but also demanding he buy her a balloon.

He sighed. After she’d run off to dance with Rebekah earlier, he’d had a hard time engineering their paths crossing. He’d try to dance near her and then she’d be gone for cake. He’d try to meet up with her for cake but she’d be getting a new drink. He’d try to grab wine from a tray to save her the line but then she’d be back on the dance floor. And then just as he’d get close to her, the damn event planner would be flagging him down for some other groomsman duty: joining a traditional dance, carting the gifts out to In’am’s brother’s car so he could take them home before anything got lost, helping Jimin’s grandmother out to her ride because she was ready to go home very early.

He was frustrated. The evening was rushing by and he wasn’t getting any time in Alex’s orbit. Everything was in the way. Everything was fucking interfering–

A hand touched his arm and then quickly pulled back; he stepped to the side, assuming someone was trying to squeeze past him to the dance floor he’d been surveying for any sight of her.

But it was Alex who looked up at him now from beneath the fringe of her hair.

“Hey,” he greeted, realizing he sounded more surprised than cool. He sounded like he’d been looking for her. He didn’t want to be that obvious.

“Hey, um… do you… want to dance? With me?” She blink at him, owlish in her ask. She shouldn’t be owlish. His heart thudded heavily in his chest at the question. No lead up. No prep. She’d just asked him outright. So straightforward. He would have fumbled for a while probably.

“Oh. Uh yeah, sure.”

“I still suck, just to be clear.”

“Ok–”

“I don’t want to mess up your game or anything–” She broke off when he touched her shoulder, nudging her to the dance floor. Her whole posture went rigid, like she was being marched to the principal’s office. Jungkook would have liked to reassure her but was too busy holding himself back from touching her more; he let his hand fall away from her shoulder in an attempt not to just wrap his arms around her and confess: whatever you want, yes, all you have to do is ask, I’ve been looking for you all night, don’t wander off again.

The anticipation of touching her again made him jumpy. When she suddenly turned and stopped, he plowed into her and grabbed her shoulders to keep them both from falling, which pulled them close together. Just as quickly they sprang apart.

He wasn’t prepared for her laugh, “You aren’t nearly as smooth as I always thought.”

“Shut up,” he grumbled. “I’m just nervous.”

“Bout what?” Her eyebrows lifted up behind her bangs. Teasing him. Taunting him. Fuck he had missed this.

“It looks like you don’t have eyebrows anymore.”

She huffed and swiped at them, brushing them to a slant so he could see a little more forehead and one eyebrow.

“There, better?” She lifted her hands to his shoulders, reaching high, but it felt too middleschool to him, even though he liked that it pulled her close. But shit in looking down at her face it was impossible not to be drawn deep into the line of her cleavage just beneath her chin, like the view was just perfect and he didn’t want that to show on his face, so he tugged her hand into his for a more proper dance position. He admired more than her tits, they were just so there tonight! Taunting him too! Everything about her taunted him tonight. Why had she worn this dress, damn!

The music was faster but they just swayed at their own pace, shuffling a little with each step. Jungkook focused at first on making sure he didn’t step on her toes or the hem of her dress or bump her into anyone else –anything to try and distract him from the reality he was dancing this close with Alex, that her body was very close to pressing against his and her hand was in his, until he could handle that knowledge. Her hand was sweaty but so was his so maybe she couldn’t tell about him.

“So…” Her lips pursed into a duck pout. He wanted to kiss her.

“Can’t believe you got bangs,” he teased. There. Easy. Simple. She’d always said bangs would make her look like a fifth grader.

Her smile was immediate, a little bashful as she admitted, “Yeah, it wasn’t a great decision but–”

“--I think they look nice–”

“Bangs are like the thing you do after a break up, I guess? It’s a rule. It’s in the handbook. I finally got my copy..”

“Ah.” Break up. Break up. She mentioned they broke up. She just put it out there. She just said it. “Um, I’m sorry to hear you uh–”

“Are you?”

“No,” he admitted. He was relieved she laughed too. Was it like Yoongi? He wanted to ask but didn’t. Just used his fingers on her back to pull her a little closer. “Sorry I wasn’t there to buy you ice cream this time.”

“It’s ok. Raincheck.”

“For… after your next breakup?”

“I hope not.”

His skin was tingling. He felt like she might be having a different conversation or he might be misunderstanding and reading too much into the things she said so he shut his mouth for a moment and just enjoyed swaying with her. He looked around at the other couples and groups dancing. It felt like they were in a different place, dancing to different music. There were loud groups of people still clustered around tables, some drinking, some just loudly talking. The dimmed overheads and fairy lights actually made everything feel a little like prom. And he was just here, drifting in the middle of it all. With Alex. Perfectly, finally at peace.

He realized his fingers were stroking the fabric at her shoulder and, to hide this gaf, said, “Your dress is really nice. Really soft.”

“You like it? I worried it was a little low cut but–”

“Nah, it’s perfect–”

“Might seem too aggressive.”

“Aggressive?”

“You know, like… too obvious.”

“Too obviously… hot?”

“Is that what you think it is?” she asked him, looking up, bangs hiding her brows again. They did make her look younger but it wasn’t a bad thing either way.

“Yeah, it’s hot as fuck.” Shit, maybe he shouldn’t have said that. “I mean, you look really pretty,” he hurried to add, even though that felt nauseatingly vulnerable for some reason. What, he couldn’t tell Alex she looked pretty? Yeah, he couldn’t. He always felt like a compliment like that to her would say too much. Show too much genuine interest. Or she wouldn’t believe him. Or she wouldn’t want that kind of attention from him.

“You clean up pretty nice,” she countered. “I liked your speech.”

“I liked your belly dancing–”

“Hey, be nice.”

“I’m serious!”

“You know I can’t dance.”

“I really liked it.”

“Are you being gross?” she demanded, a spark of their old relationship, and he felt great joy in admitting, “Yes.” But then worried it was too much, too quick, they hadn’t been comfortable in so long and corrected, “No, but I mean–”

“Uh huh.”

“Ah, Alex…” he sighed and didn’t know what else to say, just looked away and was grateful she was short so it was easy not to look in her face. He wondered if she’d know if he wiped his sweaty hand off on her dress. He was really sweating. It was going to soak through his shirt.

“I guess your– Anita hasn’t been keeping up with you?”

It was the most awkward and blatant fishing attempt he’d ever seen. Alex didn’t have grace for that kind of game, a thing he loved about her.

“Well, funny story–”

“That starts with a threesome?”

“What?”

“Ooh, are you starting to squirm?” she giggled, looking actually gleeful. “You’ll look like an asshole if you run away and leave me mid-song.” It was the second song but he didn’t point that out because obviously he wasn’t going anywhere.

“I’m not running away, I just– what are you–” His eyes narrowed. “Who’s been telling you what?”

“Just a little bird–”

“Aleeeeex,” he leaned a little closer to sound serious and insisted, “Just ask me what you want to know.”

“You aren’t dating Anita, right?”

He snorted, “No, I’m not dating Anita.” Her eyes looked so dark and sparkly when she looked up at him from this angle, and he thought she might be a little serious right now too. “I’m not dating anyone, if anyone wants to know.”

“Right, you don’t date.”

“I–”

“You don’t go to a party or a wedding with someone, but you always leave with one. Or two, if it’s your birthday!”

“Ok, that’s not quite what you think.”

“What do I think?” she asked, and duck-lip pouted again, and looked up at him with challenge. He started to feel nervous for other reasons now, like this was rocky and whatever this was might be about to break apart. He couldn’t tell if she was seriously amused or not because all these years he’d always thought she was amused but maybe she hadn’t been if she had secret romantic feelings for him. Actually maybe Alex was really good at hiding things from him.

“Are you mad?”

“No, you’re a free man to do whatever you want.”

“Our birthday party… ah,” he sighed, and looked away again and shuffled her to the side so they could move further from the speakers and hear each other better without having to talk so loudly anyone else could overhear. “I was really sad and got too drunk because you weren’t there. Maybe I did um… ask Anita and Seychelle to go home with me… I was drunk enough to shoot my shot.” He grimaced. “They took me home and put my drunkass right to bed and then fucked on our couch.”

“What?!” Alex gasped and pulled away and let out a cackle of a laugh. “No!”

“Yeah…. I guess I cried and then fell asleep in the car or something…” He hated admitting the pathetic truth but felt like maybe it was better that she understood ok, maybe he had tried to have a threesome on his birthday, but it was because he’d wanted something wild to soothe his broken heart, not because his feelings about her weren’t true.

“No, we said no sex on the couch!” she laughed and hit him on the arm as if he’d done the deed.

“Well I didn’t have sex on the couch! They did it without me!”

They were too loud and people looked over at them but her laughter was a relief.

“Oh my god that is so embarrassing for you… I was going to tease you about finally getting the threesome of your dreams but this is way better! I mean, not the part about you drunk crying, but…”

“Yeah yeah… as long as you’re happy about it…” he grumbled.

“But damn, Seashell’s really moving through our group, huh? What do you think, would she like me in this dress? She didn’t seem interested in me when I–”

She held her arms up in dance position again, a childish wordless request to resume dancing, and he nearly tripped in his haste, sliding into her space again.

“Don’t talk to Seashell,” he interrupted.

“Ahhh, are you jealous because she outfucked you?”

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t know, are you feeling competitive? She’s getting more sex than you from your own friends–”

“I don’t want sex with my friends,” he snorted. “Uh… most of them…” Shit, was it better to say that or not say that?

“I knew you and Taehyung were a little too close–”

“Alex,” he whined and laughed and pinched her shoulder. “Don’t spread rumors about me.”

“Yeah, I know, you hate attention, huh?” He scowled. She returned his stare. He loved her so deeply it made him want to laugh and slap his own face. How had he not understood what this feeling was in moments like this? Because these moments weren’t new.

She was the one to continue, “Well, I suspected you weren’t dating Anita, but I did think you got your threesome. I’m both relieved and sad for you.”

“Relieved, huh? Why, jealous? You were getting railed plenty–”

“Ok, let’s not quite say it like that,” she rolled her eyes.

“But would you be? Jealous?” he pressed, desperate for her to say yes.

She shrugged, “I don’t know. I had just turned you down.”

“Yeah. Broke my heart,” he joked though it wasn’t a joke.

She retaliated, “Besides, if I let myself get jealous every time you fucked a girl…”

“But did you? Feel that way every time?” The question was too serious. Oops. It had rolled off his tongue without him thinking it through. Before she could answer, he teased, “Whatever, I had a bunch of swings and misses in a row. And yet here you are, alone at the wedding you wanted a date for.”

Her voice had the same wistful, teasing tone to it when she added, “Dancing badly with you in front of everyone even though you wanted to be left alone so you could find a bridesmaid to fuck.”

“Ah, shit, you really know how to punch a guy in the nuts.”

“I just said the truth!”

“No,” he insisted. “The truth is I’m right where I want to be right now.”

“That’s not what you said back then,” she sang. She was still trying to keep it light. He appreciated that. He could also appreciate there was some fair muscle behind these jabs as they circled each other and tried to suss out the updates, the truths, the right nows.

“Yeah, but I was an asshole back then,” he said. “I’m a changed man now.”

“Mm-hm.”

“Turns out I don’t like you leaving me alone.”

“Yeah,” she snorted. He wasn’t actually sure what she meant by that, but she was still in his arms and didn’t actually seem mad so he’d take it. Actually, what he didn’t want to say was that he was thrilled other people were seeing them dance together for going on a third song now. He was psyched that people passed them or glanced over at them and in their minds saw a more permanent connection between him and Alex, the kind that didn’t end with after a single song. Maybe they were thinking oh, they’re together, that’s cute. Maybe they were thinking damn that’s an attractive couple.

“Jungkook.”

“Yes,” he responded to the summons from his drifting thoughts. Her bangs had fallen down again and without thinking about it, he brushed them back to the side. She caught his hand and twisted the other so she had both hands in her grasp, commanding his attention.

“I broke up with my boyfriend two and a half weeks ago and I still feel kind of shitty about it.”

“Oh.”

“We don’t have to talk about it. It just sucks to know I wasn’t my best self and I was kind of selfish and shitty in the end and… it’s really embarrassing when someone sees the bad parts of you, you know?”

“Yeah. I know.”

“I mean, he was a great boyfriend. He did everything right and he was kind and thoughtful and–”

“Ok, I know. He was the best guy to ever walk the earth. I got it. I saw it–”

“Yeah and I keep breaking up with these great guys and just for…”

For me. Say for me, he pleaded in his mind. But the new song was louder and people started jumping behind her. He tugged her close and spun so she was on the outside of the dance floor, safe from being bumped or nudged. It was harder to hear though over the louder music. He leaned down to hear whatever she might say next but he must have leaned too close because she blinked at him in surprise.

And then she lifted onto her toes and took hold of his shoulders and kissed him. Rushed and clumsy, full of uncertainty, and obvious impulse . Her lips just pressed to his, hurried, without any plan.

It was the best kind of kiss Jungkook hadn’t even hoped for.

A kiss!

She kissed him!

He slid his arms quickly around her to keep her steady as she teetered, maybe trying to pull away too quickly.

Impulse kiss? He wouldn’t leave her wondering if it was welcome.

“Get back here,” he murmured and chased her mouth, the only action his brain could handle right now as bright lights and warmth flooded his consciousness. Soft, full, sweet-tasting glossy lips against his and he’d never felt so inexperienced in his life. Her hands pressed to either side of his neck, little electric shocks at every point of contact between their bodies, at the touch of her fingers, of her lips, of her nose squashed against his.

She pulled away and he couldn’t have said for his life how long the kiss lasted. An hour? A second? Someone jostled against his back but Alex was staring at his face as if searching for something so he remained rooted to the spot in case she was going to kiss him again.

No, she was really studying him, and it made him nervous now.

“What?” he asked, eyes narrowing to hide how naked that stare made him feel.

“No regrets? No puking? Did that feel like kissing your sister?”

He was shocked by her bluntness. God, he loved Alex’s bluntness. After so many months of the confusion and disappointment and feeling like a fucking idiot to have realized his own feelings too late and worrying he’d been hurting her all along if she had allegedly loved him for so long, the way she poked at the painful parts just felt so comforting and familiar. It brought the important things right into focus. They joked about things. They could joke. And he knew her well enough to see the serious part of the joke. Because they did know each other, they shared a language and an understanding that went way back, that was true even if they were still learning new things about each other and themselves.

“I don’t know, I wasn’t thinking about that, let me see again,” he said, and leaned in. There was a laugh in the kiss this time though; he swallowed her giggles as her fingers brushed his cheek, and she sort of curled away but not really. It was like the kiss tickled her but she didn’t actually want to escape, that’s what it was like. Her lips were slower this time, more comfortable against his, he thought. He kept his face near hers even though he had to hunch and admitted lowly, “I don’t have a sister but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t kiss one like this.”

“No? It seems to work in Game of Thrones–”

“Have you even watched that show?”

“No! I’m not paying for HBO!”

Jungkook started laughing and couldn’t stop. It was embarrassing but joy and relief just suddenly bubbled over and he couldn’t stop it. Kissing her left him giddy. High. He had no choice but to drag her in for a hug, or maybe she stepped closer on her own, and he just molded around her, tucking her into his body. So many months of brokenness and the absence of her and uncertainty about whether he’d ever even get to laugh with her again healed as she stepped right back into the Alex-shaped hole in his heart. He closed his eyes and let the wedding fade even further into the background and just existed in this moment with his cheek pressed to the top of her head.

“I really missed you,” he thought she said against his chest.

He let out a long, slow breath, and then, “I know.”

She laughed and punched him in the back, “‘I know?’ Ok Han Solo! That’s not what you say!”

“No, I did too! I mean I know because I did too!”

“Uh huh.”

He squeezed her so tight and breathed in the scent of her shampoo even though it was different than the one she used before and he wondered if that was permanent or temporary. He didn’t know. He still didn’t really know anything except that kissing her was a Good Thing.

Sometimes it was fun to joke but sometimes they needed to be serious, he was learning that, so he pulled away enough to cradle her face and kiss her forehead through her messy bangs and breathed, “I really missed you, Alex.”

Her hands circled his wrists and he felt the pressure of her leaning into the kiss. Another Good Thing.

Then she quickly leaned away and laughed, “Ok, well good, I’m glad you didn’t forget me.” All jokes again, her whole demeanor as though they hadn’t just shared the kind of kisses that changed everything about a day, a relationship, a life trajectory. Ah, fuck, he wanted to just brush the bangs back from her face and kiss her again and tickle her so she’d kick him and he could twist her around to protect himself and wrap her up tighter in his arms and whisper things at her ear to make her yell at him–

“Uh, I think we should go– to our friends over– um–” She grabbed his wrist and took off, weaving through the crowd of dancers. He didn’t even understand where they were going, still too flustered by his own thoughts, by the briefest glimpse of that roaring want for Alex that had cracked open now because she’d kissed him. On purpose. She had initiated all of that!

Did she regret it now? Was she trying to escape? But she was holding his wrist, dragging him along with her. If she was escaping, she was taking him too. That was cute.

Somehow despite the limits of her height, she found her way to the group of their friends dancing on the far side of the dance floor. They didn’t seem to think anything was off but Jungkook could feel Alex’s energy even from behind; she squeezed his wrist and released him, walked straight through their group, and made a beeline for the open bar.

Halfway there she stopped and turned and caught his eye –easily because he’d been watching her still, trying to decide if she was fleeing a mistake or just feeling as overwhelmed as he was right now. She pointed at the bar and at him, a question on her face. He nodded and shrugged to answer that he knew she’d think next what do you want? Should he go with her? Probably, right? Or he should offer to get the drinks?

But she wanted a breath, he felt like that was true. She’d fled, but not completely, just for a moment.

Ah, had he kissed her really good? He grinned at the possibility that he was better at it than she’d expected. Wait, had she doubted him?! That hadn’t even been his best. He would kiss her breathless next time, until he felt her wobbling in his arms. He’d kiss her until she gasped or moaned or whimpered –which kind of noise would she make? He’d find out!

Though in fairness, she was way way way better at kissing than he had expected. Way better. Wow. Damn. He hadn’t expected Alex to give the kind of kisses that lingered on your lips for this long; he could still feel the tingles. It all felt a little fake with her gone and it wasn’t like he understood all that had just happened but at least it seemed like Alex was back in his life and he was along for whatever that ride was. Apparently it would involve kisses.

Single. Single Alex. Only a couple weeks single so maybe she wasn’t wanting to jump right into something. Ok. Ok, but she had kissed him so… he was on her mind. That was a good place to be. Hands on her body was good. Lips on hers was good–

Fuck, he was grinning too big and his friends were looking at him suspiciously. He knew that look, like they thought he’d wandered off and fucked someone in a closet. This was better!

His dance moves weren’t cool, they were mindless and distracted. He couldn’t help it. He let the joy run through his body, braided with nerves, anticipation of whatever was to come with Alex. He had no fucking clue! But maybe something! Maybe? Unless he’d scared her off?

She came back with drinks –plum wine for them each. He felt his ego swell when she handed him his glass. She was going to taste so good to kiss again– he choked on a too-big gulp of his wine as she slid past him, her own wine glass in hand, and leapt into the center of their friends with a shout. All bright, happy, fun Alex. Alex letting loose. Alex who caught his gaze again because he didn’t want to look anywhere but her and then covered her face and turned shyly away.

Shit he loved her a lot, and it didn’t feel painful anymore. Just warm and eager and hopeful. Was he making her shy? Should he flirt with her and see if he could make her really shy?

He knocked back the rest of his wine, too fast, so he’d have his hands free as he rejoined the circle of his friends to show off his own moves. If their friends noticed anything different about either one of them… so what?

***

Well shit. Shit shit shit. Shit fucking shit.

Alex’s plans were derailed almost as soon as she’d set them into motion.

Because what the fuck was up with that forehead kiss? And the way he’d pulled her into his arms and just held her?

Fuck!

And the way he’d kissed her, all soft lips and gentle hands and this little rushed warm breath that she’d felt more than heard because of the loud music.

Why was he so earnest suddenly? So different? It was terrifying! What if Jungkook was actually a very sweet, loving, sincere boyfriend?! Obviously that didn’t come from experience, what if that was just who he was when it came down to it? Would she actually be surprised? But he’d just been such a fuckboy for so long…

She just hadn’t expected the warmth. She hadn’t expected him to be so serious. She hadn’t expected to get so instantly wrapped up in him and so yeah, she needed some air, and some wine, and then some more air, and then some running around with just Rebekah, avoiding her sister who would probably say something just to set her off, and Jungkook off at a safe distance.

She was afraid Jungkook would kiss her again. She was afraid he’d ask her a blunt question she wasn’t ready to answer yet. She was afraid he wouldn’t ask her anything at all and she’d be disappointed.

She just needed to figure out a few things first. She’d had a couple weeks now both to process the sadness about ending her relationship with Hoseok and think honestly about what she needed before attempting anything more with Jungkook: She needed some answers she could be sure weren’t lies. She needed to see if the feelings were there and authentic –not just companionship and comfort and familiarity, but romance, desire. Lust.

She just wanted to be lusted after, ok? Specifically by Jungkook.

She wanted a sense of how hard she’d have to work to shape her previous friendship with Jungkook into something that more resembled the kind of relationship she wanted with a romantic partner.

And yeah she had not expected kisses like that, just right there in front of everyone! Her kiss had been impulsive but he’d pushed it further! Good luck fucking a bridesmaid now! (hehe) And she had not expected him to just hold her like that. Or sweetly kiss her forehead.

Fuck, she was melting and they hadn’t even talked about whether there was the possibility of something between them. Her plans were wavering –because yes, she’d come with plans. She’d dressed for plans. She had really uncomfortable underwear on for plans!

“Ah, my handsome sexy man,” Sabina cooed, spotting Taehyung across the ballroom. It was getting late, though the party was still going in full swing. Taehyung, Jungkook, and Jimin had their hands on each other's shoulders, dancing in a little circle, kicking their feet. After a moment, she realized Jimin wasn’t actually on the ground; Taehyung and Jungkook were holding him up. It was ridiculous. They were so ridiculous. But hearing Sabina so affectionately claim Taehyung, Alex felt that tug in her chest towards Jungkook. My handsome sexy man?

No. That couldn’t be right. It sounded impossible that she could ever claim Jungkook as hers. Well, in a way she’d always claimed him as hers, while also knowing that possessiveness she felt about him wasn’t an actual romantic claim. She’d never been an option. When all eyes in the room noticed him, his scanned for the hottest woman around and off he went with her, and that woman was never Alex.

“Let’s go dance again,” Sabina suggested, grabbing Alex’s arm. The woman had eternal stamina. Alex’s own was flagging, and she cast about for Rebekah to hold her back, but her traitor friend had wandered off somewhere else. The roadbump of her own sulky thoughts prickled her skin as she and Sabina drew closer –as she saw a woman lean in close to ask Jungkook something and he laughed and waved her off. Had it been a proposition?! Just out of the blue! Probably, right? Jungkook was that kind of hot…

See, the jealousy was going to be a problem. If Alex didn’t have confidence, if she didn’t feel like she could trust Jungkook’s attention was sincere, it wasn’t going to work, and that was part of the test. She was tired of being jealous.

He yawned, and then saw her and covered his mouth, nodding his head as he tried to laugh at himself. She had to yell to be heard over the music as she got close,

“Long day?”

“I’m rallying,” he said, sliding his hand around to her back. It felt… assertive? Possessive? Predatory? But in a good way, attentive, like–

Like he was putting on moves and she was the target.

She leaned into that same energy, or tried to, and slid her hand up to his chest as she asked, “Care for another dance?”

“You like dancing with me, huh?” he grinned. She must have seemed as cool as she didn’t feel on the inside. She nodded. He didn’t even look back at their friends as he tugged her a few steps away and against him, sliding his fingers up her arm to take her hand in his. It was so casually, familiarly done, as if they’d been dancing together like this for years. He just seemed so cool about it all, much cooler than earlier.

“Are you drunk?” she guessed.

“Me? No. Are you?”

“Nope.”

He began to lead her in steps, just small, easy, totally off beat at first but a slower song started and it was easier to move at that pace. She kept looking up at him and then away, embarrassed to make eye contact, afraid he’d read her plan too easily.

Alex was going to see if he’d take her home and have sex with her.

Because she’d know right away this last part that she wasn’t so sure about: can he desire me? Or am I just a challenge, a novelty, and he’ll be done with me once he’s gotten what he wants?

Right now, he was single and hot and in a position of visibility at this wedding. There were tons of gorgeous women here. If he didn’t want to take her home from a public place where hot women would see them leave together, well that was that then. And she’d be taking a piece of advice from Jungkook’s own book, right? Have sex early, see if he means it.

Was it good advice? Bad? Honestly, that didn’t matter. Maybe it was a stupid idea. Could Jungkook be with her even when she did dumb things? Could she be embarrassingly herself with him? Could she feel comfortable admitting this insecurity to him and feel genuinely reassured, if he wanted her to be?

But also.

But also: Could Alex be the woman Jungkook Jeon chose to take him with him? Could he want to fuck her?

He was smiling about something, she noticed. She didn’t ask but he leaned down closer to her ear and mused,

“You’re thinking really hard about something.”

“Maybe.”

“What’s up? What are you so serious about? It doesn’t matter if we get off beat–”

“No, not that.”

“Ok.”

She hesitated. No, it was pathetic. The rejection would be brutal. She shouldn’t say anything, she should just enjoy whatever dances she could have with him. Maybe she could steal another kiss later. That was still progress. That was still incredible. This wedding was magical and over the top and exhausting and she could carry away those precious moments they had together earlier as her souvenir and figure out the rest another day. Or maybe he’d ask her later to go home with him? That’s what she really would have preferred… but what if he didn’t? She did realize he might not, just out of kindness or respect, even if he wanted to. He might be trying to keep giving her the space she had asked him for months ago, even though he knew she was single now, even though she’d kissed him.

“Alex, what is it?” he asked, and this time brushed her hair back over her shoulder. The feathery touch and the soft gesture made her shudder.

Ok but… couldn’t she be the girl who got railed after a wedding for once? Couldn’t the hottest guy here take her home? This hot guy? Who kept looking at her so closely and smelled so nice and had his hands firm against her back and around her fingers?

Fuck, he was so beautiful to look at. She’d kissed him now and she wanted more. She wanted him. She wanted him to want her. She wanted so badly for this specific dream to come true, tonight, and worried she had only set herself up for failure. The want left her breathless. It seemed impossible they’d already kissed, and even more impossible they’d ever kiss again.

Could he ever feel this way when he looked at her?

In a poor attempt at self restraint, she avoided blurting out will you take me home and fuck me, substituted instead for the almost worse request,

“Will you kiss me here?” Followed by her hand lifting off his arm and tapping the side of her neck.

Fucking hell, what had gotten into her?!

And worst/best/worst of all, he did it. He didn’t even ask what the fuck she was on about. Without any hesitation, he leaned all the way down to press his warm mouth against the skin she had tapped. His lips lingered. In all seriousness, Alex felt like she nearly orgasmed alongside the full body shudder that such a blatantly intimate gesture caused. Thank fuck the music was too loud for him to hear the noise that stuck in her throat. She shivered and shirked her shoulders, squirming at the pure overload of pleasure, too much, too too much, it was so ticklish she’d scream, but the kind of too much you kind of wanted more of.

Instead of pulling away when she scrunched her shoulders, his arms just wrapped tightly around her and he chuckled against that sensitive skin and murmured criminally close to her ear, “Yeah, I thought that would be too much, you’re so ticklish.”

Damn he knew her so well.

And since his face was right there anyway, she turned hers, seeking his mouth. He seemed to realize immediately what she wanted because she didn’t have to ask. He brushed her hair back again, wringing another shiver from her that she tried to hide behind running her hands up his chest.

But shit, they were in public! The kiss had only just started but Alex suddenly felt like they were getting wildly out of control and pulled away. Jungkook looked confused and it embarrassed her, the way she ached. So quickly! Tonight was the first night she’d seen him in so long, since the arcade really –but memories of that night at the arcade fed the ache, they didn’t soothe it even a little.

“You’re not drunk?” he asked, brushing his hands against her face like he was checking for a fever.

“I’m not,” she huffed and brushed his hand defensively away. “I just…” She stared at him. He stared at her. Celebratory shouts somewhere else startled her and his small smile couldn’t be anything but endeared.

But suddenly his face took a serious look again and he leaned close, hand firm but careful on her arm as he insisted, “There’s nothing to be worried about with me, ok? I know you uh… you know how I feel about you. And I don’t know if you um– but I know you just broke up with your boyfriend and maybe you need time before you can think about what you want with me– if you even want anything! And that’s ok too, so don’t worry, I’m not going to pressure you for answers or–”

“I want to go home with you.”

“Huh?” His lips didn’t even part for the noise of surprise but his eyebrows went up and his eyes got wide.

Well shit that didn’t sound cool.

“I want…” God, it wasn’t even a test at this point. She saw what she wanted clearly. “I want to be the girl you take home from the wedding.”

“I’m not taking anyone home–”

“I want you to choose me,” she said. “I want you to take me home with you tonight.”

“Take you home with me and…” She couldn’t tell if he was in disbelief, or horrified, or genuinely not following what she was asking for.

“Take me home and fuck me, Jungkook, that’s what I mean–”

“Jesus, Alex–”

The sharp pain she felt in that moment stole her breath. She was so proud of herself for being bold and direct about what she wanted but his response felt like a rejection and she knew she sounded far less cool as she admitted,

“I thought you said you want that with me–”

“Oh, I do,” he said with an unexpected chuckle. “I do want to do that but I want more than that with you, Alex, and I don’t want to ruin the chance of more just because I got horny and impatient–”

“No, but I asked you to.”

“I know but–”

“Ok,” she said, and made to step back because this was mortifying. He caught hold of her quickly, pulling her close and saying near her ear,

“Please don’t look like that, it’s not that I don’t–”

“It’s ok if you don’t want–”

“Alex I can’t say the things I want to do to you because it’ll freak you out and I won’t risk my chance with you when I’m not even sure yet that you’re giving me a chance and we’re at this nice wedding and people will overhear and I’ll get kicked out and Jimin will never forgive me.” She could feel his lips brushing the edge of her ear as he spoke, his warm breath ghosting across the shell of her ear and the side of her neck. She felt completely consumed by him for just a moment, just like she wanted. His hands tightened on her body. She felt the intensity in his words. “Trust me, the way you look tonight is driving me fucking crazy and if you weren’t you I’d already have you over– but not because I don’t want you like that–” Obvious panic broke through the sexual heat of what he was saying as he overthought his own words. Alex hadn’t even been thinking he meant that. She was having a hard time breathing as all the blood rushed down her body and her heartbeat pounded painfully between her legs.

She kissed him, afraid she’d say something pathetic. She just wanted him to touch her right now. She’d take the closet or the backseat of the car or whatever, no wonder Jungkook got any woman he wanted saying things like this in that way, his gaze so dark and sparkly like that. She felt wild with want. And he was looking at her like that, which felt wild too. She felt like they were practically fucking on the dance floor, just right in front of everyone, standing so still and wrapped around and whispering to each other like this, lost in each other. Someone was going to complain about public indecency and kick them out.

“You’d already have me what? What would you do if I wasn’t me?” she prodded, keeping her face hidden by his shoulder so she could try and catch his breath. What had she been thinking, asking a question like that to try and catch her breath to?

“I want more than that with you.”

“More than what?”

“More than…” She felt him lick his lips. “More than finding some coat closet and dragging that dress of yours up and– don’t ask me these questions, it’s mean.”

“Why is it mean?!”

“Yah, you’re driving me crazy. We’re at a wedding, in front of everyone, our friends are looking for us–”

“Oh, you’re feeling shy?” she teased.

Instead of laughing, he paused before pulling away to look into her face as he admitted, “I want more than a wedding night one night stand with you but is that all you want from me?”

Fuck. What a tragic question. She saw it all written there on his face. He might as well have thrown a bucket of ice water over her head.

“I want both,” she answered as honestly as she could. “I want you to want to take me home for the night and do all those crazy things to me that have the instagram girls lining up to suck your dick and I want to wake up in your shirt the next morning and kick you in the butt until you make me breakfast and–”

“I want that too,” he said and took hold of her arms. “I want all of that too, Alex. I want all of that with you too. Everything we had before but also with the fucking and sucking and–”

“Seriously with your mouth?” she started to laugh. Because Jesus he was such a fuckboy with that mouth of his! He started laughing too and they curled together and she could still feel her heart pounding in various places throughout her body but she could breathe through it now, relieved that he was not actually rejecting her yet. The deepest sigh of relief rushed out but she wasn’t actually sure if it came from her body or his.

He was trying to be sweet. And thoughtful. And careful.

And now this confession was out in the open, in the very small space between their bodies.

In that moment, it was impossible not to look at his behavior, how he had been in the last few months, and not see how clearly different he had always treated her compared to other women as a good thing. This wasn’t the thought or effort or emotion he put into those women. This wasn’t a desperate grab for controlling a co-dependent friend’s time. This was a side of Jungkook he was showing only to her, that she had always seen some element of. Alex was special to him. She felt special to him.

Test passed. Even without the fucking.

“Ok,” she said. “I won’t sexually harass you anymore–”

“Wait no!”

“I mean I won’t pressure you into taking me home, just because it was my fantasy–”

“Wait no,” he said again, grinning at her giggles as he took her hands. “What do you mean it was your fantasy?”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you over the music!”

“Alex!”

She began to walk away and he, as she had predicted, dove after her, and wrapped his arms around her in a burst of old playful closeness. He laughed at her shoulder, forearms digging into her stomach, and while she noticed the softness, she didn’t feel self conscious about it at all.

Jungkook wanted to fuck her in a coat closet. Her. That was cool. He wasn’t doing it but he said he wanted to, and instead he was wrestling with her on the dance floor in the middle of a very expensive wedding, so that still counted for something.

“Ok ok ok you two,” Namjoon said, clapping his hands. “You’re making the grandmas clutch their pearls.”

Alex escaped from Jungkook’s grasp with a victory shout and spun a circle around Namjoon. As if he’d actually read her mind, Jungkook caged Namjoon in on the other side and they both started to grind and booty-bump their much taller friend.

“Hey. Guys. Guys! Ok, very funny!” He looked like he was going to flee this embarrassing display, but suddenly In’am and Jimin ran up to join and it wasn’t like Namjoon could flee them, they were the guests of honor!

Alex just felt so happy and free. When she caught Jungkook’s eye as he danced and laughed and rough-housed with his friends, she felt like a connection she had always depended on too much was in fact now real and safe and recognized. It wasn’t like they were even a thing yet but they were going to be, right? That’s what all this meant? That had just been a confession, right? They both wanted each other and short of giving it a try and realizing they were very wrong or very incompatible or something right away–

He wouldn’t let her down. Probably they’d both fuck up a lot but yeah, that’s how it went, right? If he kept crinkling his nose at her like that though she could forgive a lot of fuck ups.

Rebekah nudged her arm and wiggled her eyebrows. Just that was enough to make Alex cover her face, overwhelmed and embarrassing and giddy. She shirked her shoulders and held her hands out and grimaced.

“Good for you,” Rebekah smiled and flung her arm around Alex’s shoulder. “He better treat you right.”

“What!”

“You heard me. I may not seem like much but I can fight–”

“Rebekahhhh, are you drunk?” Alex giggled.

“A little bit.”

“Thanks for telling me things even if you weren’t sure if I’d want to hear them. I appreciate your honesty.”

“Oh yes, uh huh. I’m a pretty good friend.”

“And thanks for not trying to fuck my best friend.”

“Well, to be fair, he wouldn’t have gone for it anyway,” Rebekah admitted.

“No, that’s not true! You’re a vixen! The only thing that kept him safe was your loyalty to me, I know that–”

“Yes, that’s it! I barely even noticed he was hot.”

“I think you’re hanging out with May and Minxi too much, you get sassy when you drink now,” Alex laughed, swinging her around. Actually, the past six months had given her the chance to get closer with Rebekah too. There were lots of good things happening in her life. She was very loving and grateful for everything right now.

“Thanks for reminding me I’m still single.”

“Hey, I am too!”

“For like fifteen more minutes.”

Alex just laughed because she didn’t know what else to say. No, that wasn’t it. They weren’t talking about that! Yet! Damn, she felt drunk, but the only thing she knew to do to comfort Rebekah was dance until her friend was laughing again. Did she know anyone she could introduce Rebekah to? No, she’d be a terrible matchmaker. Wait, but Jungkook knew so many people. Ok. A nice little project for them to do together…

Alex glanced over and happened to notice Yoongi sitting at the table by himself, gaze trained on his phone. This was notable for several reasons. The first of course being that Alex had initially been so worried about showing up dateless to a wedding Yoongi would be at and now instead she didn’t care at all, but Yoongi had also shown up dateless and allegedly fiance-less now. The second being, if he was so bored, why was he still here?

She needed a break from the dancing and the noise and the whirlwind of emotions that wrapped her and Jungkook up everytime they were on the dance floor, so she wove her way through the chairs and collapsed in the seat beside Yoongi.

“Hey.”

“Oh, hey,” he greeted and lowered his phone. Then jerked his head towards the dancefloor and joked, “Good to see some progress after… how many years has it been?”

“Aish, come on,” she laughed.

“Never knew you could be so handsy but I guess it just had to be with the right guy,” he added. There was nothing mean or hurt in his voice though, more just relaxed. Teasing. Casual.

She nodded and shrugged, “Maybe. Maybe I’m just affected by the wedding. What’s gong on with you lately? Heard you’re around a lot more these days.”

“That a problem?”

“For me? No, of course not. We’re cool. I mean, you’re the one who might still be pining over me–”

“Nah, I’m over it.”

“Ok you could act a little more nostalgic for me,” she laughed.

“Sorry. Guess I’m a little…” He just waved his hand, a meaningless gesture.

Her sympathy was sincere as she offered, “Yeah, I heard you went through a recent breakup too but… bigger magnitude. Engaged.”

“Yeah, I’m aware.”

“Sorry,” she grimaced. Maybe she shouldn’t have repeated what Sabina told her.

“Eh. It was mutual, I guess. You know… sometimes other people can put a name on your feelings before you can do it yourself, you know?”

Her eyes narrowed as she said slowly, “.... Yes…” She followed his line of sight, easy to trace: to Namjoon. “Oh my god,” she gasped and grabbed his arm. “Are you in love with Namjoon?! Does he know?!”

“Raquel sure thought so.”

“And was she wrong?”

“You and Jungkook boyfriend-girlfriend now?”

“Hey now.”

Yoongi snickered, “Yeah, maybe we’ll trade answers someday.”

“Maybe tomorrow morning? See you at breakfast?” Alex giggled. She wasn’t even embarrassed by her bawdry joke; she laughed at Yoongi’s surprised face. “Come on, that was objectively funny.”

“Eh.”

“It was! Me? With that kind of an ego? Us, exes, winding up with roommates? Oooh that would be so good, you’re such a good cook, just like Seokjin was–”

“Goodbye, Alex,” he said bluntly, but he was laughing at his phone as she stood up and looked around, feeling all her energy restored. Ready for another round of wedding. She could go all night at this rate. This was fun! Even unexpected closure and friendliness with Yoongi? What a great fucking night!

Where was Alex? Refrain of his night. If she wasn’t right against him, Jungkook was looking for her. He wanted to know where she was. He wanted to be able to reach her at any moment. Every kiss, every dance, every touch left him desperate for more.

The relief that came from being able to ground himself with her again was shockingly normal. He’d expected to feel awkward with her longer. A little nervous still, sure. But for all the anticipation he’d felt in the last few months at the thought of interacting with the girl he had a crush on, that girl was still Alex. Who made inappropriate jokes and kicked him when he teased her and scrunched her shoulders up exactly like he’d expected to when he kissed her neck after she’d asked him to. Alex who he could communicate with in a glance, and who made him laugh with a look, and swung between being the life of the party and then sneaking off for some alone time because it was too much.

Alex who had fucking shocked him to the core asking to go home with him.

And he’d said no!?!??

What the fuck was wrong with him?!

He was just in shock. He had hoped just to be near her tonight and instead they’d kissed and danced together and kissed more and then she brought up that and it just seemed like asking for too much. It made the evening veer into the unrealistic; this had to just be a dream, right?

Fuck, her little gasp when he’d kissed her neck. What had compelled her to ask for that? Of course he’d done it. God he wanted to hold her down and do it again, really make her gasp and squirm and cry out and cum–

Ok, he had not expected her to be so open and straightforward and just break his brain like this tonight. He was barely handling the dress! Be nicer to me, Alex. When did you get so mean?!

He ought to step back. He kept trying to put space so he could think rationally about the right thing to do. No short term thinking with Alex. He wanted the whole thing, the long term, the big picture with her. No just giving in to what he wanted to do when he had her in his grasp right now. He wanted to show he was mature and serious and respectful. She’d just had a breakup. He didn’t want to be a rebound.

Was she just on the prowl? Was that why she’d dressed so good and had so much confidence? She danced without abandon. She joined anything she was called to. She was clearly having a fantastic night and she had admitted she wanted to get taken home by someone and–

No, but she hadn’t said someone, she’d asked him to take her home and…

And, you know, fuck her. Alex. His best friend. Who he’d been longing to do just that to for months now.

Who even needed alcohol when a sexy woman in a velvet dress had you by the balls and you were standing there trying to decide whether to just let her or resist for some higher thinking…

Both? Could they really have both? She said she wanted both…

Fuck, this woman was driving him crazy!

Jimin’s brother and Taehyung had snagged him to get all the bags of eco-friendly confetti ready for people to chuck at Jimin and Ina’m to cap off the night. It was after two in the morning, and Jungkook was shocked at how many of the guests were still here. Even older guests! He overheard talk about moving the party somewhere else. Party to sunrise, apparently! Jungkook was exhausted after the work and emotions and and just everything of the day.

But as he shepherded guests past the table to grab the baggies and out to the circle drive where the limousine waited for In’am and Jimin’s ceremonial departure (they were staying at this hotel and would circle back after a drive around the city), Jungkook realized the night was coming to an end. Soon the wedding would be wrapped and he’d be free of groomsmen duties, free to go home, time to say goodbye to Alex and what, just hope all this stuck? That the next time they saw each other, she still wanted to kiss him? Was this his one opportunity and if he didn’t seize it, she’d be onto someone new tomorrow? It didn’t sound like Alex but neither did kissing him in the middle of the dance floor, neither did asking him to take her home and fuck her, neither did– this was just uncharted territory here. He didn’t know. He didn’t know what he was doing here! He just knew he couldn’t let her leave without some assurance that this had not all been a dream. He didn’t want the night to end ever.

“Everyone’s ready!” Taehyung called up the line from the circle drive to Jungkook, standing in the center of the path. Jungkook waved a thumb’s up to the hotel entrance to pass along to the newlyweds. He’d been looking for Alex to stand next to but couldn’t find her.

The shouting started and people began to throw the heart-shaped white confetti and shout and music played as In’am and Jimin came out of the hotel, hand in hand. Jungkook had to wedge himself in at the end of the sidewalk. He ripped his own cone of confetti open to toss, and in doing so, glanced directly across the path, where Alex stood with Sabina and Rebekah and Namjoon and Yoongi and maybe more of their friends, all shouting and throwing confetti but Jungkook really only saw Alex. It was like magic, seeing her big smile as confetti floated down between them and camera flashes went off and people shouted. He really thought time slowed down.

Yeah, there was no way he was going to remember Jimin’s wedding as the night he didn’t take Alex home. They didn’t have to have sex! They could eat junk food and play video games until the sun came up. They could pass out the second they got to his bedroom. He could sleep on the couch if she changed her mind. But he was going to drag tonight out for every second he could.

Alex had a fantasy of being the woman he took home? He’d be a fucking idiot not to make that come true.

So as soon as Jimin and In’am were in the limo, Jungkook darted across the path and grabbed her hand and dragged her back from the line of partygoers.

“It’s all in my hair!” she laughed, shaking her head, brushing it off her shoulders.

Jungkook brushed it out of her bangs and asked as casually and no-pressure as he could, “Hey, want to come home with me?”

Her eyebrows raised and he felt a moment of panic. Hadn’t she said that’s what she wanted earlier?! Shit! Shit shit shit!

“Really?” she asked, and crossed her arms –under her tits. “That’s how Jungkook Jeon gets women to go home with him? That’s your game? You sound so–”

“Huh? Wha– well but– yeah but I’m not putting moves on you,” he defended.

“Um, ouch.”

“You want me to put moves on you– but– but I already told you that you’re more than that–”

“Damn. How did you ever get laid?”

“I’m just trying to tell you that there’s no pressure to have sex or anything, you can just come over and we can get fries on the way home or something– stop making that face!” he laughed and covered his.

She shook her head and admitted, “My whole world is changing right now. Your instagram is nothing but lies! This is what your game was like in high school! I thought you turned into some superstar fuckboy since then–”

“Fine!” he huffed and turned away from her. His friends were making a point of not noticing them, he could tell. Other people were heading back into the venue to get their things, or going straight out to their cars.

He turned back, ready to say something good he’d think of on the spot.

Alex was gone. She had misunderstood! FUCK. She’d started to walk back inside. He ran after her, already laughing at his own stupidity. She must have expected he’d follow though because it was easy once he caught her hand to get her to stop walking, and easy to back her up against one of the columns lining the hotel walkway. She was so short, it was easy to rest his elbow above her head and lean in close and trace his fingers down the side of her face to tilt her jaw up.

“Oh,” she said.

“It’s time to go, babe,” he said. Her lips twitched. She was trying not to laugh. But that felt ok because she admitted,

“Damn, that’s pretty good…” And something about the way she swallowed made it seem more like she was nervous than that she thought he was ridiculous.

But then he started to laugh as he realized, “So uh, you got wheels we can use, babe?” The laughter erupted from her. She doubled forward, hands to his chest; he dropped his hands to her arms.

“You don’t have your car!”

“Jimin picked me up this morning!”

“So we can ride back with Namjoon!’

“He’ll get pissy if I’m fingering you in the back of his– shit, too much?”

“Oh.” Her eyes went very big.

“Uh… sorry, I don’t know what’s too much or what you think is funny–”

“I don’t either,” she admitted and he was so fucking endeared by her in the moment. He loved the glimpse of her honesty and uncertainty. It made him feel better about his own. “Just… as long as you aren’t like making fun of me–”

“No no, I’m not. Shit, I fucked it up–”

“No,” she said, grabbing his arm. “It’s good then. Um… treat me like one of your insta girls–”

“Absolutely not, I actually care about seeing you again,” he laughed. “But I will take you home with me and we can just see what uh, what happens.”

“I don’t have my car either though. I was planning to go home with someone.”

“Who?” he asked, obviously thinking she meant like Rebekah or something. She just raised her eyebrows. “Wha? Who? You better mean me…”

“Hm…”

“Alex…” He slid his arms around her and tried to drop his mouth to her neck but she was too quick lifting her shoulders with a squeal.

“Say it was me,” he demanded.

“Actually I was hoping Seychelle would be here–”

“Absolutely not.” He couldn’t suppress his laughter, “Can’t risk her converting you.”

“Exactly. I’m ready and willing–”

“Don’t say that in public,” he interrupted. “Wait until we’re home.” He winked at her, meaning it playful. But he saw the flicker across her face, where she wasn’t sure if he was joking or not.

Goddamnit. If Alex really wanted that, was he really going to tell her no? Especially when she’d just admitted she basically planned this. This wasn’t a drunk spur of the moment mistake. She’d come here so hopeful of him– really? This was really all on purpose? So then had she really dumped Hoseok for him? She left her car at home for him? Obviously she wouldn’t have been stranded completely if things hadn’t gone well but… but her hope in him made him bolder.

“So… you wore this dress for me too?” he asked, reaching out to finger the sleeve.

She made a face, “Um, I wore this dress because I look amazing in it.”

“Yeah, you do.”

“But maybe I was hoping someone would notice me in it.”

“Just anybody, huh?”

“Yeah, just anybody,” she grinned and giggled. It was the girliest he’d ever heard Alex giggle. If he’d been watching her act like this with anyone else, he’d known instantly she had a crush, it was so obvious. Her flirting was just so cute. “You know, going to a wedding alone, you never know who might be there, maybe you want to celebrate with someone afterwards.”

“Well then you’re lucky I noticed you before some other guy who uh, doesn’t know how to make eggs in the morning… or something… god, why do you keep laughing at me?!”

“I’m just nervous!” she laughed and hit his arm. “I’m not used to being on the receiving end of your game when you’re being serious about it! Well, I mean, you used to try to pull this kind of shit when you wanted something from me but… but it didn’t make me feel like this before!”

“Oh yeah? What do you think changed then?” He let go of her sleeve but realized she must be cold now, still standing outside without her coat.

“I don’t know! I guess… just… because it could go somewhere um different this time… I mean different than you just crying because I beat you in Smash again–”

“Don’t get too excited, I have been playing a lot of video games lately,” he warned. And slid his arm around her to pull her into his jacket and herded her towards the door.

“Yeah but I’m just innately better at it than you.”

“Uh huh. We’ll see… hey. You know even before all of this,” he mused, “you were always my favorite woman to leave with.”

“Wow.”

“What?”

“I don’t know, it’s kind of weird to hear you call me a woman instead of just girl or shrimp. Oh my god, does that mean you really have realized I’m a woman after all these years?!” She was teasing him, the teasing felt so good, he felt giddy all over again. And apparently when he got giddy he wanted to say raunchy things to get a rise out of her.

So he assured her quietly, “Oh I know you’re a woman, and whether it’s tonight or another night, I will be more than happy to wring every single orgasm from your little shrimp body–”

“There’s no way this is how you seduce women.”

“Yeah but it’s working with you, huh?”

She glared. He was too giddy to even take the kiss he wanted, just tapped her nose because she’d hate it and ordered, “Go get your coat, babygirl, I’ll get my things and– wait, how are we getting home again? Hey, Namjoon!”

He had to walk away quickly because calling Alex babygirl didn’t feel jokey, it felt new and exciting and yes still jokey but also heavy and intentional and now there was no reason he couldn’t call her baby anymore and he was just really excited and ready to get her home. If Namjoon wouldn’t stop for fries, maybe he could doordash some on the way…

Guess what this chapter is too long to fit in a single post so go here for Part B!

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