#trying cause I've been desperately trying to get another sketch to work

[an-obsessed-cactus]

Shoddy sketches series: Day 1

okay i just decided to start practicing drawing cause i wanna get better at it but i literally never do it(and i mean literally or as close as u can get while still having it done in ur lifetime). i always liked drawing but for some reason never did it in my spare time? so everything was always just for school and even that wasn't a lot.

this is the last thing i drew on paper. it was 3 years ago. for school💀 i know shame on me

then last last thing i drew were these three(appa -from atla- i followed a yt tutorial. i watched another tutorial on nose sketching and threw this together and it doesn't look half bad? and i just winged the eye. still quite proud of that). that was when i got a drawing tablet and then literally nothing for two years. and now this.

i just went on a random yt tutorial to do some sketches and I don't really like them that much and i know it's not near finished. but in the few days I've been using tumblr i got a weird confidence boost. and I'm trying to work on my perfectionism anyway so I'm gonna try to start a series and just post whatever i manage to draw. I'd like it to be a daily thing but I'm finishing high school rn and shit hit the fan. I actually started drawing to procrastinate on a project. oops doops😊 anyways. basically i wanna kill two birds with one stone and work on my perfectionism and drawing skills at once. (and i desperately need someone to hold me accountable even if it's just in my head)

[leconcombrerit]

May I offer a Logan sketch in these trying times ?

[professorsnape394]

The Potions Master’s Apprentice

Chapter Four: The Three Broomsticks

A/N: This is the fourth part to my fanficiton ‘The Potions Master’s Apprentice (Severus Snape x OC)’. Chapters 1-16 can be found already uploaded on Wattpad under the same name. Feel free to leave requests in my inbox for anything Snape related you want me to write. Leave a comment below if you wish to be added to my tag list.

Pairing: Severus Snape x OC (Dumbledore’s Granddaughter)

Summary: A talented young witch is employed as an apprentice professor at Hogwarts, but who will she be working under? Severus Snape is not best pleased with his new responsibility of taking on an apprentice, however she is relentless to create a friendship between them. Will she be successful? Or might the friendship just go a little two far? With the eyes of her grandfather constantly watching over them, an attempt at a relationship might not be in the cards for Aria Dumbledore and Severus Snape.

Word Count: 1733

Warnings: n/a

Credits to Gif Creator

The following days transpired just as the day before had done; a lot of potion brewing and a little conversation. However, more notably Severus Snape was actually participating in the conversation for once. Aria could not yet say she had seen a pleasant side to the man, however he was acceptable to converse with at the very least. By the end of the third day he no longer pretended to busy himself with textbooks and he actually elected to help with the potion brewing for once. Being able to talk to the Professor and ask him any questions helped her a great deal in learning the correct procedures. She felt herself being more at ease around him, and soon enough they had developed their own way of working together, that she found quite enjoyable. Even Severus had become accustomed to the woman's presence in his classroom as she pranced around the cauldrons, laughing every now and then at his sarcastic comments he hadn't entirely meant to be humorous.

Aria had been lost in thought as she stirred the final potion to completion. "I was thinking." She said cautiously. "It's pretty hard finding things to occupy myself at nights, there isn't much to do here, except aimlessly wandering the halls. How do you feel about maybe taking a trip to Hogsmeade this weekend, have some dinner, maybe drinks? It would make a change from the elves cooking, although I admit they'd be pretty hard to beat."

"I appreciate the offer Miss Dumbledore. However you know how I feel about spending time with Mr. Hagrid, I doubt a change of setting would convince me, especially with the addition of alcohol." Severus spoke, his tone softer than it usually would at such a request.

"Hagrid wouldn't be there." She hastened to add. "He mentioned he has business out with the castle grounds. I just figured since the two of us would be here anyway, it wouldn't make any sense for us to sit alone."

"You may have forgotten, Miss Dumbledore, but I like being alone. I eat alone every night, and I do not wish to simply be your back up plan, now Hagrid has left you to do the same."

"I don't mean for you to be a back up plan Sev- Professor Snape. I just think it might do us both some good. After all haven't we been getting along better these past few days." Aria wanted to get to know the man more, she felt they had got off on the wrong foot and the way to fix this was spending more time together, and hopefully they would even become friends at the end of it all.

"You haven't been as disagreeable as I expected you would be, I will admit. This does not change my previous opinion." He stated.

"At least consider it." She pleaded.

With a sigh Snape flipped another page. "I'll consider it." He agreed, continuing reading his book, no longer interested in conversing with the young witch.

The next few days dragged in more than ever. Aria enjoyed keeping herself busy and was not used to having this much free time. The only thing keeping her sane was her passions for drawing and nature. She chose to combine the two and spend her days outside, sketching the beautiful landscape she found herself in. She preferred to opt for portraits, capturing the essence of humanity in her sketches, but trees were fine too. She shrugged.

Sunday morning eventually came around and Aria chose to tackle something she had been putting off ever since her arrival at Hogwarts. A small pile of letters had accumulated on her bedside table, ignoring each one as they came in. She immediately recognised the scrawled writing on the envelope and could not face opening them. Every second day she received a letter and it broke her heart knowing what lay within. Reading each one carefully, she knew she could not face writing the response the sender desperately awaited. Instead she scribbled a small, generic reply, making sure to include that she would be too busy to write often due to her crazy schedule. This of course was a lie as she had virtually nothing planned for the next couple of weeks until term begun. Aria did not want to face even reading any more letters as long as she remained at Hogwarts, and so she swore to herself she wouldn't no matter how hard she knew it would be.

A firm knock echoed through her quarters just as Aria sent her letter off with beautiful brunette barn owl. "Come in." She called curious as too who would be calling on her. Shocked to see Professor Snape striding into her private chambers, Aria couldn't help but question his presence there.

"I've had time to think about your offer." He stated blankly, visibly out of his comfort zone.

"And?" Aria pressed.

"And I suppose there would be no harm in joining you for one meal. After all, as you say, we both will be here alone, we may as well keep each other company."

"Fantastic!" His colleague gleamed, jumping up from her position on her couch. "Just give me some time to get ready and I'll meet you there? Say six oclock at the Three Broomsticks?"

"Six is fine with me. Don't be late." He warned, leaving the room just as quickly as he came.

*

Aria entered the Three Broomsticks at five forty-five, ensuring Snape had no reason to reprimand her once again for her tardiness. It stunned her to find the sallow skinned man already sitting at a booth, firewhiskey in hand, patiently waiting on her arrival. She couldn't help but smile to herself as she watched him tap out a rhythm on the side of his glass as he took yet another sip. She wondered if it was out of impatience or nervousness, either way she thought it slightly endearing to see.

Hearing the click of a familiar set of heels quickly approaching him, Severus Snape looked up from his glass, almost needing to hold back the urge to smile, but managed to keep his composure. He rose to his feet, holding out a hand to greet the fellow Professor, instantly cursing himself for such a foolish action. "Sit." He commanded, motioning to the seat across from his own. "I'll get you a drink."

"Oh no, there's really no need Professor." Aria insisted, shaking her head, causing her beach-like waves to brush over her exposed shoulders. "I'm afraid alcohol doesn't agree with me at the best of times." She admitted.

"Correct me if I am wrong, Miss Dumbledore, but as I recall it was you who suggested a meal and drinks. Or did I mishear you." Snape asked, feeling almost foolish, having already down two glasses of Firewhiskey.

"I did say that didn't I." The young Miss Dumbledore blushed. "I apologise, sometimes I just cannot stop myself when I speak, I often forget the consequences of drinking, which as it happens is the ultimate consequence of drinking." She chuckled.

The older man shot her a small look of disdain, not at all as amused as she had expected him to be. He let out a small grunt of dissatisfaction, and proceed to down the dregs of his drink.

It took a few more awkward moments of silence and Severus being slightly more irritable that Aria had wished for before the two finally settled in to a rhythm of conversation. Soon enough it came time to eat and Aria took it upon herself to call over the waitress. As he ordered Aria watched as Severus made no effort to look up at the woman serving him. It crossed her mind that maybe this was a deliberate attempt at ignoring her voluptuous breast and curvature of her hips. However, on the other hand she considered that maybe he truly was not interested as she thought back to their conversation a few days before.

"She's stunning." Aria couldn't help but observe. "You should go for it, chat her up, she might be into the dark, brooding, intellectual type."

"As I told you before, Miss Dumbledore, dating it not top priority for me. If you find her so attractive why don't you, as you say, 'chat her up'." Snape replied sarcastically, not expecting the woman to take him seriously.

"I might just." She said, finding her eyes following the waitress back to the kitchen for a moment or two. He couldn't help but feel a little jealous as the witch watched the woman walk away from their table, though he was not sure why.

"So tell me Professor Snape." The young Professor began. "What are the other Professor's at Hogwarts like? Who am I took look out for? Who's my competition." She grinned, wriggling her eyebrows menacingly.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean." He hummed in response.

"You know." She shrugged. "Who are you close with? Will I have to fight them for custody of you." She laughed, although the Professors expression did not change. "What I'm trying to say Severus is, I'm new here, besides yourself and Hagrid I know no one. I'd like to consider us friends, though you may have a different opinion. I was simply trying to express my nervousness at being the new girl. I was hoping you'd be able to help me settle in, introduce me to your other friends and colleagues that is." She sighed.

"You do not seem to understand my disposition, Miss Dumbledore, that which I feel I have made abundantly clear. I am not one to socialise. I am not one to make friends. I am here to teach and teach alone. I do what your grandfather asks of me and that is the extent of my relationship with the staff. They understand how I am, and respect that. I do not bother them and in return they do not bother me. You have been the first to struggle with this concept, Professor." He struggled to grant her the title.

"I didn't realise." Aria stuttered slightly, not understanding how she had not caught on. "I had simply thought you had a vendetta against me, due to my position here at Hogwarts. I didn't realise you shut yourself off from everyone. I apologise for any inconvenience I have caused you." The tone of her voice softening, becoming almost a whisper-like volume. She was embarrassed she had forced him out of his habits and brought him to the Three Broomsticks to clear the air. She realised now it had been a pointless act. This man had been stuck in his ways for over a decade and she would not change that a fortnight into knowing him.

"I am here, aren't I." Severus stated, trying not sound as harsh as he previously had. "Had I truly despised you I would not be wasting my time here with you. I have come to the realisation that if we are to work in such a close proximity to each other, it would be best if we maintained at least some level of civility with one another."

"I appreciate the sentiment, Professor." She replied shyly, remaining silent. Immediately Severus regretted opening his mouth. He didn't entirely hate her company and in fact he had found himself starting to enjoy the evening. It took him a minute or two to gain the confidence to speak the words aloud, but he figured the pay off was worth the sacrifice of a small amount of pride.

"Will you stop fretting woman." He demanded. "I was just beginning to find your constant rambling tolerable. If I wished to spend the evening in silence, I wouldn't have made the effort to accept your invitation to come here tonight. You have managed to entice me thus far, do not spoil what may be your one chance at a friendship with me."

"A friendship?" This piqued her interest.

"You know what I mean. A working relationship. A tolerance. A chance for me to accept your position as my apprentice." Snape corrected himself, fumbling over his words.

"Mmmm." She smirked, taking a small sip of butterbeer. "I'll just pretend a friendship is off the cards for us then, Professor. Although I don't recall you mentioning trips to Hogsmeade as an exception to your reclusive personality." She raised an eyebrow suggestively.

Despite his annoyance at her persuasive abilities, and daring comments, he was glad he had convinced her back to her previously inquisitive self.

Both choosing to ignore any reservations they might have about their 'non-friendship' the two spoke for hours with ease. With each empty glass of fire whiskey Severus Snape found himself relaxing more into the conversation, his reputation becoming a distant memory. It was the first he had allowed himself to truly relax in possibly the whole of his life.

It seemed in one evening Severus had gotten to know all there was to know about Aria's life, although strangely she mentioned nothing regarding her family and Snape chose not to pursue the subject. He loved listening to her talk, she was a rambler, rarely needing any interjection from him except the odd mumble here and there and that's the way he liked it. He was a listener, he loved taking in new information no matter the subject. Most importantly it meant he did not have to share anything about himself, unless the woman specifically asked, and even in those rare occasions, she knew better than to pressure him when he chose not to provide an answer.

Aria told him of the schooling she received in Ilvermorny, her school in America. She told him of her job working in a local alchemists after she left school. She confided in him of her dream to become a professor, or an auror even, really she was just desperate to make a difference in someone's life and her dream would not succeed by spending the rest of her days working in a dingy old shop. "And that's why your grandfather brought you here?" He questioned, the topic piquing his interest. "You told him of your dream to teach?" "I guess you could say that." She agreed, not wanting to raise any more questions than necessary. "He didn't bring me from America though, if that's what your meaning. I was already here. My mother sent me to school in America to protect me, with all that Wizarding War carry on and what with me being a Dumbledore, she didn't want to put me in any more danger than I already was. She remained here with my father however and I visited on the holidays." Snape raised a single brow at the mention of her mother and father but changed the subject completely, seeing the woman being to shy away slightly.

"It's getting late." Severus observed. "I should walk you back to the castle before it gets too dark."

"That would be nice" Aria smiled, rising from her seat.

The couple made their way back to the beautiful lit up castle as the sky turned a deep shade of blue above them. They continued to speak all the way down to the dungeons, this time Severus participating just as much as Aria. The Potions Master escorted his apprentice to the door of her quarters, the two of them swaying awkwardly not knowing where to go from here.

"You can come in for a drink... if you'd like." Aria hesitated to ask. "Although I'm not sure I have anything alcoholic, so tea might need to suffice."

"I appreciate the invitation, but it's been a long day for me, I'm afraid I must retire for the night." Now they were back in the familiar castle grounds Severus felt as though he had suddenly returned to his body, and the events of the night lingered at the forefront of his mind, a deep feeling of regret developing in his stomach.

"Very well." Aria agreed, feeling slightly uncomfortable herself. "Good night, Professor Snape."

"Good night, Miss Dumbledore." He spoke softly, rocking anxiously the balls of his feet, waiting for the woman to disappear into her quarters. With a simple nod and one final smile from Aria, she vanished from his sight. The sound of the door closing echoed through the halls, ringing in Severus' ears, and suddenly he felt more alone than he ever had before.

Aria stood with her back to the door, a sigh of relief escaping her lips. As much as she enjoyed the evening with her mentor, the intense awkwardness that occurred at her door, got her thinking about the man on the other side. Her intention was to get to know the man better, and though he did not confide in her much, she felt she had achieved that, maybe more than anyone ever had.

Why had he allowed her to get close to him when he claimed to distance himself from the world?

This thought circled her brain for the rest of the night.

Taglist:

@ayamenimthiriel

[lovelywingsart]

Forgotten Memory

-- Karl Heisenberg X OC (AFAB, She/They) --

So I did a few sketches of Emelia meeting the other lords(and Dimitrescu daughters) a while ago, and I threw in a little something for the Moreau one- well, here's what's basically the small follow-up that I teased for that one.

**Small reminder that I have a small 'Masterlist' for these!**

---------

*Warning?: Lost/regained memory, mentions of wanted parenthood, angst kinda?

Summary: A small, interesting discovery is made during a first visit to Lord Moreaus domain, leading to a heartbreaking revelation.

Emelia was silent. They had returned from her first visit with Moreau, and she had to admit, the 'Fish Man' was kind and rather fun to be around despite Heisenbergs dislike of him. The metal man in question sat at a separate table behind her, tinkering with what she could assume was an experimental piece for the Soldats with his hair in it's normal 'bun' for physical work. But her focus wasn't on him. No, it was on the tape Moreau had excitedly let her borrow. It lay on the corner of the table she had been sitting at, and though she had previously been sketching plans, she was unable to concentrate. Simply finding it at the watermill sent a chill of recognition down her spine, and she couldn't get that familiarity out of her head. It was as if it triggered... something. But she didn't know what, exactly. The cover of the movie alone was scarily familiar, but... she didn't know.

And so, here she sat in silence, staring at the cover of the yellowed and somewhat grimy case, picking at her brain for any possible lead. Not even the occasional German swearing behind her shook her from the concentrated phase she was in as Heisenberg caused a tiny shock among the wires he was currently fiddling with. She had been staring at it since she picked it up... She barely looked away from it on the way back to the factory, nearly tripping over multiple things while Heisenberg practically led her around. But she couldn't quite put her finger on why it was so familiar.

She was suddenly jerked out of her trance as she heard a rather loud 'FUCK', and she turned to see Heisenberg looking at his hand.

"Are you alright...?" She asked quietly. He shook his head, sticking a bleeding finger in his mouth.

"Eh, I'm fine... damn thing shifted on me." He muttered. She was silent for a moment, seemingly spacing out until she spoke again.

"Would you like a bandage...?"

"Nah, I'll be fine." He shrugged, inspecting the digit once more before looking at the thing on his desk. "Wouldn't be the first time I've had the threat of losing a body part." His tone was almost thoughtful as he shifted his left leg. He then turned to face her. "What the hell is with YOU, anyway? You haven't stopped staring at that thing since we left the ugly freak. Usually you'd yell at me to wear gloves."

"Because you should..." Emelia rolled her eye slightly, "And he's a kind man, Karl. Don't be mean." she huffed, shaking her head as he muttered something under his breath. "No, I... I'm fine. Just thinking, is all."

"Ah. Well, don't hurt yourself." He smirked, turning back to his work as she glared at him.

"Twit..." she muttered, her eyes drifting back to the tape. She swore there was something about it...

She finally reached for it, holding it somewhat close to her face. She studied every detail. Every curve of the title letters. Every bit of the scenery. It wasn't until she turned it around to read the back that she paused, her brain picking out a few words to focus on. She simply closed her eye for a moment, only for something... a scene... to flash in her mind;

A woman stood in bright, almost entirely white scenery, holding a small child on her hip. Her other hand held that of an older child, and the childs other hand was held by a man. They seemed... happy. But she couldn't tell... The faces were simple blurs. She could only tell by the distant sound of laughter as the man and woman embraced, the two children huddling to them with giggles. The woman, she noticed, wore her hair longer with a ponytail to the side. No other features were clear. There was a sadness as the scene began to fade away, even as she desperately tried to clear the faces of the individuals.

Emelia jerked into reality once more with a gasp, making the man behind her jump with a startled swear.

"Fucking-" He started, shaking his hand again before looking at her with an irritated grunt. "What now???"

She stared at the tape in silence for a few seconds more before setting it down carefully and pushing herself to stand.

"N-Nothing, I..." she started, her voice wavering just slightly. Heisenbergs irritation all but disappeared as he watched her, switching to confusion.

"Emelia? What's wrong?" He asked, but she shook her head.

"I-I'm fine, I..." she tried, finally just running her hand through her hair and walking towards the door off to the side. "I'm just... tired. I'm going to sleep."

"... Oh." He replied, his confusion still evident. "Make sure you wake up, then."

She couldn't help but crack a small smile. It was always his way of saying 'sleep well'.

"I'll try."

~

Oddly enough, the bed wasn't too comfortable.

Emelia lay on her back, her arms behind her head while staring up at the dark ceiling. She had changed into her casual 'night' attire, thinking she could think better with the light off... But it only clouded her mind. The scene she saw kept playing in her mind. Who were these people? Why did she see them?? She let out a frustrated groan, moving her hands to rub her face. It had to have been a memory, right...? Was she one of the children? Was she remembering her family before this? Of course she had remembered small things as a child, merely second-long snippets of a foggy past that still wasn't entirely clear. COULD she have been one of the children?? While the thought should have calmed her, it only made her question more. If it WAS her original family, why couldn't she see the faces? She should have at least been able to remember her own... Not to mention the scenery itself was entirely different than she ever remembered... None of her memories were ever pure light. Something wasn't sitting right... But she thought back to the children she saw. They were happy... Laughing. They were all laughing a pleasant laugh, even the two adults, who she assumed were the parents. It was the joy of the scene that managed to calm her, and she couldn't help but chuckle from the silliness of it all.

She froze.

Wait.

She gave a confused hum, almost trying to repeat the chuckle. She then thought back to the memory, watching and rewatching the scene in her head, her muscles suddenly tense. Her attention was soon drawn to the woman. The woman's laugh seemed familiar as her face slowly became visible. Almost TOO familiar. It was almost like... Wait, that... Was...

No.

She bolted into an upright position once she saw the womans face clearly, her eye wide as the scene suddenly became uncomfortably clear.

The adult woman was HER.

But why?? HOW???

She threw the covers off her legs and pushed herself away from the bed, nearly ripping the door open with a burst of strength. She nearly ran down the steps, her breathing halted. How could that have been her? How could those memories be hers? She was older in that scene than she remembered to previously have been before all of this, and there was very clearly no sign of childbearing on her own body that she saw or knew of. Hell, she never thought she had BEEN with anyone like 'that' until recently, how could-

She startled Heisenberg once more as she pushed open the door to the workshop, making him jump as she briskly made her way back to the desk she had been sitting at. He spoke to her, but she couldn't hear him as she grabbed the tape and stared at it. Her... A family... Smiling, happy...

Another vision played in her mind, this one she had been familiar with. She was a child, tugging the apron of what she always assumed was her mother. 'Can we? Please?' Her small voice asked. She was a quiet child, that much she assumed from the memories she had unlocked before. She was already greeted with a kind smile as her faceless mother nodded. This memory she had seen, and it was always the same; she led the mother over, sitting on a fluffy couch in front of a large TV. A movie always played, but she couldn't see it... Until now. It was the same movie she currently physically held. But something changed... It was as if a new reel of film was cleaned in her mind, and she saw herself look up at the mother she cuddled to at the point where the memory would have cut off. 'I want a family like that!' She heard herself say excitedly. 'Just like that?' The mother asked, her voice warped somewhat. Emelia watched her child self nod. 'Yeah, a big one, just like that.'

It was then that the previous image of her older self played, vaguely hearing her child-self speak of her own family hopes over the laughter. And that's when it hit her with a wave of brokenhearted nausea. THAT'S why it was so bright... So happy... The vision wasn't a 'memory' at all. No...

It was a DREAM.

A dream...

No.

It was a goal.

A life goal her child-self had.

A goal stripped mostly once she joined the corporation before being taken Miranda years later. A goal that Miranda herself had more or less stripped ENTIRELY with no hope of settling down as soon as that goddamn parasite was embedded into her chest.

An important goal she had entirely forgotten about until now.

The realization hit her like a head-on impact from Sturm, and she dropped the tape. Her eye was wide, staring at seemingly nothing as her breaths came in quiet wheezes. She didn't even know she was crying until she felt a hand on her shoulder, jumping out of her thoughts with a gasp and whirling to meet the concerned face of Heisenberg. He seemed to jump back as well, startled to see face that pure sadness and anger. She could almost hear the memories of singing as she stared at him, her body trembling.

"Emmy??" He asked, taking his hand from her shoulder as if he himself had caused the tears that now streamed down her cheek. She was silent for a moment before her lip trembled.

"I... I remember..." she whimpered, taking deep breaths. Heisenberg paused before suddenly pressing on her shoulders.

"Sit." He said quickly, turning away to grab his own chair as she sat carefully. He brought the chair up in front of hers, sitting directly across from her. "What do you remember?" He asked, his voice genuine as he watched her. She forced herself to speak.

"Do... D-Do you remember... Uhm..." she paused with a shaky breath in attempts not to start sobbing immediately. She HAD to calm herself... "Do you remember when I... When I told you about that memory... The one when I was a child and the movie...?"

"I do... That was months ago." He replied, tilting his head. "What about it?"

"Th-There's... There's more..." she nodded to the tape on the table. "It... It was that... and... a-and..."

She finally broke down, covering her mouth as she let out a wavering sob. She nearly curled in on herself, only stopped by Heisenbergs hands on her shoulders. He then gently grabbed her face, leaning forward and making her look at him.

"Hey... Hey, look at me." He spoke. His jaw tightened as her eye met his, and he saw a painful recognition. "What the hell did that tape do?"

She seemed to hesitate for a moment before finally opening her mouth.

"... I... I wanted a family, Karl..." she whimpered.

He froze.

'Family'.

It was a word he grew to despise over the years. He hated it. He hated it with a burning, goddamn passion. The meaning of it was lost to time and trauma, and yet it sounded... innocent coming from her. It wasn't malicious like Miranda, or insulting like Alcina. It didn't even sound like a pathetic joke as it would have with Donna or Moreau. There was true pain behind the word as she spoke it, and he frowned as he watched her break down in front of him despite clearly attempting to hold it together. She always told him her memories... Hell, he encouraged her too. He knew what it was like, and he hated the thought of the same happening to her. But this time, he didn't know what to do. 'Family' was a sore subject around the factory. She let out a shaky sigh.

"I-I'm sorry, I..."

"No, no, just... Don't..." he started, only to sigh, himself. "Damn it-... Come here."

Emelia froze as Heisenberg pulled her into an awkward hug, though it wasn't enough to stop the tears. Instead, she reached up to hold his arms while her head threatened to fall onto his shoulder. He was silent for a moment, feeling as she almost curled to him, only stopped by the chairs. He couldn't quite think of anything to say. Nothing to help. Not even anything witty.

"... Keep talking." He said finally, feeling her breath halt.

"... What...?"

"I said, keep talking. Tell me about it... I guess." He managed. He felt her head shift while she managed to breath enough to sniffle.

"Is that a joke..." she asked quietly. He rolled his eyes.

"You really think I'd joke about that?"

"... Do you really want me to answer that..."

"Just keep talking, Emelia." He groaned. She was quiet before letting out a shaky breath and speaking.

"I-I... I remember..." she started, clearing her throat slightly and sniffling once more, "I remember begging her to watch it... I guess she never argued... Not that I could tell."

"Hm." He hummed quietly, setting his chin on top of her head. "How many times did you watch it, then?"

"I... I'm not sure... A lot, I suppose...?" Her voice was quiet as she sighed. "All I can hear is singing, I don't know..."

He raised a brow.

"Singing??"

"Shush..." she mumbled, earning a chuckle.

"So what does that have to do with wanting..." he paused. Hell, SAYING the word felt like poison to him... But she knew. She took a shaky breath before pushing away from him, wiping furiously at her eye as she sat back in her chair. She looked over at the tape for a moment with a frown.

"I told her I wanted a family..." she managed, reaching to pick up the tape and turning it over. "'A big one just like them', I told her... I guess I loved it enough to dream of it. Children, a husband... I suppose I could have had... SOMETHING like that with the corporation, but... NOW..." Her voice then gained a hint of bitterness as she leaned forward to put her head in her hand while holding the tape with the other. "It's impossible thanks to HER... And yet, I feel as if I still want it, now that I know..." The sadness quickly turned into a hint of anger as she lightly tossed the tape back on to the table. She was unable to stop the new flow of tears that started, glancing at her right arm. "Bloody hell... How damn stupid am I... A goddamn 'family' from THIS bloody mess..."

Heisenberg was quiet for once, watching as she wiped at her face furiously once more. What the hell was he even SUPPOSED to say to that?? That she was right?? No, he wasn't actively trying to upset her... Maybe he would joke normally, but even he knew that now wasn't the time. Oh, hell...

"Don't be hasty, Emmy. You've, ah... you've got a lot of life to live." He spoke awkwardly, clearing his throat slightly. "Or... um... something."

He jerked back as Emelia gave a disbelieving snort before choking back a sob as she looked to the movie again.

"'Or something'... Not like anyone would be willing to contribute while I'm like this..." she muttered, not seeing the look he gave with her voice still bitter as she frowned with a trembling lip. "That bitch stole every hope I had of being normal... I can barely remember everything still, and yet this is what I get when I do..." her voice lowered, but cracked with a mixture of pain and anger. It was a mix Heisenberg himself knew all too well. "I wanted a family and she tore that away for her own..."

"You could still-" he started, only to stop and snap his mouth shut as she looked up at him. What the fuck was he just about to say?

"I could still WHAT, Karl...??" Her voice was nearly pleading as she looked up at him. "Even if I tried, she'd still... She'd..."

She had to breathe. It felt as if her chest was collapsing in on itself as she doubled over with a sudden gasping sob. She was robbed... The life she once dreamed about wasn't at all possible. Even if she tried. Even if she somehow found a way, she knew it would be ripped from her again by the woman in selfish attempts to fix her own 'family'. And yet, she felt the distant longing she remembered feeling as a child... It wasn't until she felt arms around her once more that she started to look up, only to be nearly yanked off the chair as she was hugged with a sudden force and nearly brought into the man's lap.

"Don't say that." He growled quietly, making her freeze. "You still have a goddamn chance. Fuck Miranda and fuck her plans, she's not gonna do anything if you do." He paused for a moment. "She CAN'T do anything if you do, because I won't fucking let her."

Emelia froze in his arms, decently stunned. She said nothing, though couldn't help but curl into his shoulder as she fought off more tears. She knew he did it to make her feel better... And that's what seemed to hurt the most. He wasn't the most affectionate or reassuring person, especially with this. Sure, he had his odd ways of giving comfort, but it was never easy for either of them. But she managed to take a few breaths, returning the hug somewhat as he set his chin on her head. There was silence for a few moments before the reached out with a trembling hand and picked up the tape, looking at the cover with a light fondness despite her anger.

"... I think I'll visit Moreau tomorrow..." she said quietly, almost feeling his look of disgust.

"Why??"

"Unless you would like to watch it with me." She said simply, glancing up at him. He seemed to calm slightly, but still shook his head.

"You sure watching that is the best idea?" He asked, releasing his hold on her slowly. It was as if he didn't want to let go. She shrugged, wiping at her face.

"Potentially not, but... I don't know..." she sighed, pushing herself back on her own chair. She almost smiled as Heisenberg kept a gentle hold on her arms. "Maybe... maybe it would help... He said it was one of his favorites as well, I think it would be nice to have... willing company."

"I wouldn't be 'willing'?"

"Would you REALLY be, Karl?"

He raised a brow for a moment before giving a huff, but he didn't speak. She couldn't help but give a laughing snort before sniffling. It was then that another thought entered her mind, and she pondered over if for a few seconds, chewing the inside of her cheek.

"I think I'm going to get dressed." She said finally, slowly standing from the chair. She was met with a confused stare.

"I thought you said you were tired?" Heisenberg asked, watching as she walked to the door with the tape clutched in her hands. She paused to look back at him for a moment.

"Oh, I am. But now I'm more angry than I am tired." She said simply. "Have you got any disposable Soldats?"

She felt a little better as she watched a broad, toothy grin form on his face.

"I can figure something out." He said, suddenly standing and moving over to his desk to grab something. "Go ahead, I'll meet you down there."

Emelia only nodded, going through the door quickly. She knew it might not help entirely, but she felt the deep need to destroy despite not showing it on the surface. Whatever he was able to put together, she planned on imagining Miranda's face on every single creature she tore apart while mentally preparing herself for the trip the next day. WOULD watching the movie help? Would it assist with more memories? Or was it the worst idea she had ever had? She didn't know, and she couldn't keep her eye off the case as she retrieved her own clothing. She felt the pulses of her mutation even before she slipped on her own shirt, eventually letting the tendrils of muscle expand and grow along her skin. The bone spurs were the last to form, allowing her to flex and adjust her arm slightly. There was a moment of silence as the muscle hardened, feeling her heart beat against her chest. She took one last look at the tape before letting out a growling huff, letting the anger of the forgotten memories flow through her as she finally walked out the door and ran down to the depths of the factory walls.

[dredgenridge]

I am desperate to leave the living situation I am in. I need help. I have tried other place in the past and not a budge. It's a stretch for me to try here. It's a hit or miss deal.

I am 21 years old, working 40+ hours a week with $10 an hour, no vehicle* and I am living with my homophobic family. This has been my life for a while now in this broken down house, literally. I'm in hell.

I do love my job and the family I work but 10 and hour doesn't cut it to live on my own. I hate asking money from them because they have treated me so well in the past. I always feel guilty asking. (This family has gave me gifts amd money to help me get items I need like the special boots I had to order. I need to replace them since they are beat up but they were not cheap for me and work helped me.)

These are the KURU Boots they helped me get because I work outside all day and I am on my feet. I have had these for around six months but they are done. I need to buy a new pair of KURU shoes but I am holding off for at least a few more weeks. (I have plantar faciatis. Work has worked around that fact with me.)

Before you ask, I have tried to do another job, ended up quitting because it was too much to go from outside retail (from 8am-6pm depending on what day it was) to a restaurant (on weekend nights) and didn't get to go home til around midnight a few times? (and for them to ignore some of my notes on my resume about my mental health? I was not going to stay so I quit there and continued to work at my current job.) I have applied for other part time jobs and got one call back but couldn't make it and asked to be rescheduled and they say' "Yes. We can do that." Then that time comes and never get another call?

*In April, it will mark two years my own vehicle has sat in the yard. TWO. YEARS. I do, however, have someone coming Friday night (Mar 13) to look at my truck and then return Sunday afternoon to work on it. So I won't be vehicleless too much longer, hopefully. I've seen his work but I am afraid to be screwed over because I have issues with that. I am always scared since I have been screwed over before.

That truck is my golden ticket outta here.

I am the only LGBT+ person in the house. I know my family is homophobic because they wear it proudly on their sleeve. I have heard their vile bullshit. I hate living in south North America.

It is like they don't think I can hear them when I wear my headset but boy oh boy, all the shit I've been fucking stuck hearing? I have had no privacy in 5 years. FIVE. Look at this.

I am near my bed right now and that is my view to the living room and kitchen. I hear everything. I hear the fighting between my parents, my brother when he talks about me. When I make comment about it they go back and say, "That's the point." when it comes to them talking about me. They clearly are too thick to see how much that has mentally damaged me.

Right behind this wall, is a health hazard.

From the sock over to the dresser is damp on the carpet be cause for over a month we have had a water leak from our water heater tank.

When I opened the door in the room to the water heater tank is, in the room beyond that brick wall- this is what I saw.

A brick wall is literally keeping me from that right now. I am sure that is black mold. I have not felt the best since I opened that door and took those pictures.

My so called father knows about it and hasn't done shit.

You see this?

The bathroom with the working shower has looked like this since at least 2017. That plywood is starting to get bad because of us showering.

In the other bathroom a light could fall in any moment. Been like this for roughly a year or more. I don't know anymore.

We live down the road from a restaurant and when they spray for roaches, we know. We know because my brother works there and they are in our house for a few weeks. I got up late one night to go get some water, flip the switch and I managed to see three small roaches scuttling into dark areas of the kitchen.

Do not get me started on mice during the winter. I don't see them but I can sure as hell hear them.

Another thing. The house is old so the foundation is not stable. The living room floor is warped in different areas and we have a leak under the house with our sewage line I believe. But at least once a month, under the house has to be pumped out of water. We do not have a basement.

My dad clearly does not give a flying fuck about anyone but himself. I think my absent father is a scociopath. Let me clarify. Physically there but never interacted with his kids. HE DOES NOT AND WILL NEVER KNOW HOW TO INTERACT WITH HIS FUCKING FAMILY.

The audacity to think I wanted a rifle that I will never shoot as a high school graduation gift?? I told him I wanted an xbox for graduation around the time he was about to get the rifle and it baffled him. I have always had a high interest in video games and I had not owned my own gaming system like an xbox or playstation of my own up until 2017. It was always share the Wii or PS2. He doean't know me at all.

I've heard my parents fight for at least the last few months and I am so sick of it. My friends are fucking worried beyond belief. They are stuck fucking hearing it when I am in a voice party with them and it is so embarrassing.

Just get a fucking divorce already. I am really tired of playing mom's therapist. I get that she needs to vent and all but to your traumatized, mental disordered child? I already am suffering enough from lack of needed treatment. It has taken such a strain on me that my facade is completely crumbling away at work. I can't hide my pain much longer.

I have wanted to kill myself twice in the last year alone to escape this. I have wanted to make it quick and the least messy as possible with one of the many hand guns thay lay around in the house. I was so close to going through with it the second time I thought about it.

I had made my mind up. Write a letter and a will for what my friends get and what to throw away. I was about to start writing it once I decided that I was ready to die. I scared some people and they told me to go to a hotline to talk me out of it.

That was seven months ago.

I need to escape and this is my last shot on asking for help. (I have asled help for different things and I have been overlooked.) I know friends who want to help me are unable to. I am not mad at them. They are already doing what they can to help themselves first beofre me because I care aboit them and want to make sure they are in a good spot before anything else. They aren't in the best situations either.

I need financial help to help me move. I am only asking for a total of $5000. If you can only donate even just $1 dollar, I will be more than thankful for you help. I am also opening commissions at this time. Please bear with me on timing. I am working 40+ hours a week right now and will work on the commissions as soon as I get a breathing chance when I get home.

My Commission Prices

$10 for a sketch and that will go from a bust to full body. I only do traditional- so pencil and paper. No sketch lines, just a clean pencil drawing. No limit to characters on one drawing. You will be charged for more than one character if you are going to have them on individual papers.

+$1 if you want it inked.

Note- I will not draw backgrounds, do shading or draw any NSFW. I am not adept in those fields.

My Paypal-

Thanks for at the very least reading through. Please help this be spread around. I will follow up with weekly updates through reblogs.

[scribblehoneybee]

The Strangest That I've Seen

[ for anon - “just breathe, okay?” siren au ]

Henrik yawns, rubbing his eyes before glancing down at his empty notebook. The full moon gave him enough light to sketch but his inspiration was… lacking. One could only draw the same skyline so many times, after all.

When Chase had come back drenched, drunk, and rambling about sirens, they thought he had gone insane. But he still swore to it sober, so after a week he managed to drag Jackie along. The captain came back the same way.

Henrik still can’t help but be skeptical, though. He’s a man of science! If he’s going to believe in some mystical creature there had better be some proof first. So once both men had finally fallen asleep, Henrik took their ship’s small dinghy and set off to find out for himself.

But after three hours, he is admittedly starting to lose his patience.

The dinghy continues to rock gently on the calm waters, slowly lulling him to sleep. He shakes his head for what seems like the hundredth time, his notebook slipping off his lap. He has to stay awake. Even if there aren’t sirens in these waters, that definitely isn’t a smart idea. Maybe he should just go back to the ship. He blinks slowly, shifting to lean against his hand. He’ll… go back in a minute…

Just then, a ripple darts through the moon’s reflection and jostles the dinghy. Henrik jumps, grasping the edges to steady himself.

“It’s just a fish,” he mutters to himself, trying to calm his nerves, “Just some big, stupid fish.”

“Well that’s pretty rude,” a sweet voice teases from behind him.

Henrik whips around, eyes wide, only to see… nothing? He blinks hard, shaking his head to clear the haze of sleep from his mind, “I must be more exhausted than I thought.”

“Or crazy, judging by how much you talk to yourself,” the voice says again, giggling.

This time when Henrik turns, he sees him - a gorgeous man with long, silver hair trailing in the water behind him. His blue eyes seem to sparkle in the moonlight, and through his wide smirk Henrik catches sight of a few too-sharp teeth.

A siren.

“Hey there, sailor,” he teases again, voice seeming to reach a bit too deep into Henrik’s ears. “I’ve never seen you before, are you one of Jackie’s friends?”

Henrik continues to stare, completely in awe. “You’re… real? How is this even possible?”

The siren snorts, swimming up to prop his elbows on the side of the dinghy. His eyes dart to the abandoned notebook and he grins. “Stubborn, weird, and trying to work by moonlight? You must be that pretty doctor they always talk about.”

“I might be,” Henrik says, guard still up. Even if Chase and Jackie always got away safely, there was no guarantee that he would do the same. He sits down slowly and meets the sirens gaze. “What is your name?”

“You can call me Marvin, I doubt you could say my real one,” his eyes sparkle even brighter when he laughs, Henrik notes. He wonders if that’s by design or just a trick of the light. These creatures are supposedly built to charm and seduce, so it’s certainly not out of the question.

He doesn’t even realize he’s still staring.

“You still with me, darling?” Marvin teases, reaching up to wave a hand in front of Henrik’s face.

“Yes, sorry,” Henrik says, somewhat snapping out of his daze. “I’m just… tired. I was just about to head back to the ship before you showed up.”

“Is that really safe, if you’re falling asleep just talking to me?”

“It’s not like I have much of a choice,” Henrik admits, yawning again. He keeps finding himself being drawn back to the siren’s eyes, and hanging on to his every word. Something isn’t right. He feels far too safe around this creature. “Are you-”

“I can help, you know,” Marvin interrupts, grinning. It’s almost too easy for Henrik to ignore the teeth with those eyes staring straight at him. “The water is so nice and cool, it would wake you right up.”

Henrik catches himself just before he nods. “Do you think I’m stupid?”

The siren giggles, “Of course not. Your friends say you’re very smart. I just want to make sure you get back to them safely. After all, you’re just so tired. Sitting out here all alone, letting the waves rock you oh so gently, it would be so easy to let those heavy eyes slip shut. And we wouldn’t want that, now would we?”

“No, I…” Henrik mutters, eyes fluttering. He tries to shake his head again, blinking rapidly to clear his mind and vision. Everything but Marvin is a blur. “What are you-”

“Come here, closer, darling. I just want to help.”

Henrik’s body moves before he can work out a response, closing the short distance between himself and the siren. He’s even more beautiful up close.

“Now, that wasn’t too hard was it? And I bet you feel even better now.”

“No… Yes? I don’t…” It’s so hard to think with those eyes so close and that voice bouncing around his head. He’s just so tired.

“A quick swim has never hurt anyone, right? Your friends always come back just fine. Better, even. That’s why you came out here. You had to see for yourself.”

“I guess…” Henrik manages. His vision blurs and tilts, and his thoughts feel like molasses, sticky and slow.

“So let me help,” Marvin smiles, arms reaching up to wrap around Henrik’s neck and draw him closer, “Just a short little dip in the water, and then you can go right back to your pretty friends.”

“Just… for a minute, maybe,” Henrik mumbles. The weight of the siren’s arms drags him down, until he’s bent almost completely over the side of the dinghy.

“Mhm, a nice, long minute,” Marvin’s grin turns wicked, and in a flash Henrik is being pulled into the water. The siren kisses him deeply as they fall, making Henrik’s mind sputter and swirl.

When he finally manages to pull away, Henrik gasps in a stream of bubbles, the cold shock from the water enough to slightly rouse him from his daze. It’s not enough though, he realizes, and the siren easily draws him back in.

“Just breathe, okay?”

Henrik shakes his head furiously, sending another stream of bubbles to the surface. His lungs burn.

“You’ll be okay,” Marvin’s eyes glitter even brighter now, his voice echoing through the water. It’s... entrancing, and Henrik can already feel himself starting to give in again.

“Trust me.”

With that final urging Henrik gasps, taking in what should have been a lungful of water. His mind races - he’s going to drown, he’s going to die.

Instead, the burning stops.

He can… breathe?

Marvin’s gentle laugh bounces around him, disorienting him further. “See? I told you. Jackie was right, you are stubborn.”

Henrik’s eyes go wide, and the shocked expression only causes the siren to laugh harder. If he wasn’t so preoccupied with the fact that he’s not currently drowning his pride might’ve been hurt.

“The kiss, silly! Wouldn’t want you drowning on me. Not yet, anyway.” Marvin winks, his iridescent tail flicking out to wrap around Henrik’s legs. “Have a little more faith, darling.”

Fascinating, Henrik thinks, mind finally calming enough to let him process what’s happening. He can breathe - underwater! There has to be some kind of way to replicate this, maybe with blood. A bit morbid, sure, but he’s certainly done worse-

Marvin kisses him again, pulling Henrik away from his thoughts. He falls into it almost too easily, hands reaching up to tangle in the creature’s long silver locks. Like before, the sensation is overwhelming, sending his mind spiraling down into the depths. And he feels so… warm. All he wants to do is stay here in this beautiful creature’s arms. His thoughts have never been further from drowning.

No wonder so many have died like this. Henrik’s not even sure he would care.

The siren pulls away, a sly smile on his lips, “Well, darling, I know I said it would only take a moment, but you don’t seem quite alert enough to make the trip back just yet. Would you like to stay with me a little longer?”

Henrik nods eagerly, not even giving himself a chance to think.

“Adorable,” Marvin giggles, leaning in for another kiss. He reaches up and tugs the ribbon out of Henrik’s hair, letting it float freely in the water. “And beautiful, too. Jem’s going to love you.”

If Henrik was in his right mind, the mention of another name would have raised some questions, but his thoughts are too full of Marvin to think of anything else. He kisses him again, moaning against the siren’s lips. The desperation should be embarrassing, humiliating, but he can’t help himself from wanting more.

He’s never felt anything like this, and he never wants it to stop.

Henrik lets go of that last nagging voice in his head - the one telling him that this is dangerous, that these creatures are infamously untrustworthy - and allows the siren to pull him deeper. He’ll be fine, he promises himself. Marvin said he wouldn’t drown, and he hasn’t yet.

Besides, it’s just another minute.

[mentalillnessmouse]

Hi I was wondering if you have any ideas for regulating my sleep schedule. I've been very depressed and keep falling asleep in the daytime to avoid the suicidal thoughts, but then that means I can't fall asleep until 2 AM, and then I wake up again at 2 PM. I wouldn't really care but it's interfering with my ability to go out in the morning and do things I enjoy. I mostly need ideas on how to not fall asleep during the day. It's just that nothing matters enough to me to keep me awake.

Hello Anon!

I struggle a lot with sleep regulation as well, so I may have some tips for you that I have discovered along the way.

The best thing I have found that keeps me from sleeping in the day is going out somewhere early in the day. Doesn’t have to be with anyone, you could just go to the mall and get breakfast or lunch. This forces you to actually stay awake, since you can’t just willy nilly take a nap on the sidewalk or in a store. I find that eventually I forget about the tiredness, and can get through to the evening.

Stay on your feet as much as you can, so your brain doesn’t have time to think it’s a good time to sleep. Avoid reading too much, sitting at the computer, watching TV (aka sitting down), and if you like exercise, that will help too.When I was very desperate to fix my sleep, I would tend to stay up for the full night and next day to try to sleep at a regular hour, but that’s not healthy, and it never really helps. 

The best way to keep your nocturnal habits consistent is to follow Sleep Hygiene. To give you some ideas, I’ll list some of the tips.

Avoiding stimulants such as caffeine and nicotine close to bedtime. 

Exercise to promote good quality sleep.  As little as 10 minutes of aerobic exercise, such as walking or cycling, can drastically improve nighttime sleep quality.

Ensuring adequate exposure to natural light.

Establishing a regular relaxing bedtime routine.  A regular nightly routine helps the body recognize that it is bedtime.This could include taking warm shower or bath, reading a book, or light stretches.

Go to bed the same time every night.

It is important to subconsciously connect being in bed with sleeping. Don’t read in bed or talk on the phone. Remove clutter and items that remind you of work from your bedroom as well, such as your computer.

Try to stop using all electronics 1 full hour before bed. That includes your television, computers, phones, e-readers, and tablets. If you absolutely can’t tear yourself away from any of these items, at least turn on the red light filter.

If you can’t fall asleep after 20 minutes, leave your bedroom and do something relaxing somewhere else. You don’t want your mind to associate your bed with frustration.Do the same if you wake up during the night and can’t fall back asleep. In either scenario, don’t focus on the time, as it will just cause unhelpful anxiety. Read a book, sketch, or do another calming activity that can be done in low lighting. Do NOT turn on your electronics!

I know some of these tips are a bit daunting and don’t sound very fun, but even utilizing just a few of them can help tremendously. I hope you get some rest!

Having trouble falling asleep? Here are some tips from followers that might help.

“Sleep Better, Cope Better”: 6 Insomnia Causes & Cures

Sleep Hygiene

>Reyes

[melanin-kingshit]

No BS

Plot: Chris is frustrated and you help him relax

Warnings: Language, Smut

Word Count: 3,253 enjoy 😉

You were downstairs working on a new project that you were just given. You had to design a logo and business cards for an upcoming stylist. She was very specific on what she wanted which made it fairly easier for you, after all working with your boyfriend on some of his projects also taught you a lot of patience when it came to stuff like this.

While you sketched out the picture you had in mind, your thoughts were immediately interrupted when your boyfriend of 3 years, Chris, stormed into the house huffing and slamming the door behind him, causing you to jump and mess up on your drawing. "FUCK!" He shouted, frustrated. He swung his fist, knocking over a glass vase you had sitting on the small table next to the sofa. You jumped up and immediately went over to get a broom to sweep up the broken glass.

He didn't even acknowledge your presence. He went straight upstairs to the room you two shared. Your eyes followed his movements, a bit concerned. Once you finally got all the glass off the floor, you slowly made your way upstairs to find Chris in the room you share, his shoes were separated on the floor as if he kicked them off. He was pacing around the room, picking up small things, like markers and little notepads, throwing them as if he were a pitcher. "Chris?" You questioned standing in the doorway, leaning with your arms crossed across your chest. He continued pacing as your eyes followed him. You took a step further into the bedroom.

"Baby, what's wrong?" He huffed before stopping in his tracks. He stormed up to you, his face hovered over yours.

"Remember that complete bullshit ass incident just to paint me as the bad guy?" He asked.

"Which one?"

"Exactly" He walks to the bed and sits down on the middle of it. "Now we gotta go legal and sue for defamation cause some chick said I raped her in Paris"

"This is annoying. I know baby." you sat down next to him. "But you gotta stop throwing shit" he shook his head and lied back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. "Annoying? Baby it's beyond that. Try being in my shoes and every time you do something good, something bad outweighs that because people wanna see you fail. Ever since 2009, I've been painted as this guy I know I'm not. I did my time for that incident and it's like people would rather see me dead. I'm sick and tired of it Y/n."

You sighed and laid back next to him, listening to him rant. "Why don't you take a break and separate yourself from the media for awhile?" He turned his head and looks at you. "Don't you think I've tried that. It doesn't matter my name is always dragged into some bullshit, and then when I respond trying to defend myself. They either never believe me, or they don't even fucking care. What I say no longer means anything and they'll take anything and run with it"

You saw and heard in his voice his genuine frustration for the situation. Over the years it's just gotten worse, and you felt bad for him. He knew you tried your best but it never seemed like it was enough for you. You peered over at him and watched as he clenched his jaws, visibly angry. You sighed and nodded. “After 9 years of this, you're still strong and all this washes over you like nothing happened. Eventually this will too."

He ran his hand down his face and shook his head. "Nah, because this time I'm actually suing someone. I can deal with the 'oh he threw my phone' 'he kicked me out and yelled at me' but this?? Framing me for rape? You've got to be fucking kidding me. I have a daughter, and you have all these tabloids eating this shit up, like it's the truth, I haven't been asked anything about this situation." You ran your hand up his shirt and began feeling around on his chest. "Well.... I know what can cheer you up" you smiled and sat yourself onto his lap, staring down at him. He put one of his hands on your hips and used the other to guide your face down to his. Smiling, you gave him a peck on his lips and pulled away. "Promise me you won't let this get to you?" He bit his lip and shrugged, you sighed and grabbed his face, leaning in to kiss him. This time he took it deeper than the last kiss.

You had your hands resting on his chest, while he had both of his on your ass. The kiss deepened and his slid his tongue on your bottom lip begging for entrance, you accepted and ran your fingers along the trim of his shirt, desperately wanting him to take it off. He obliged and immediately went back to kissing you and began trailing kisses from your jaw down to your neck and often sucking a mark into your neck. Your hands roamed his chest as he found your sweet spot and nibbles into it. "Mmmmn" you whined and let out a small gasp when he bit down and left his mark. You could feel him smirk against your skin and move down to your collar and leave kisses there as well, while he began to move his hands causing there to be a bit of friction between you two, making him let out a small groan.

He was focused up until his phone began ringing, looking at the Caller ID he saw it was his lawyer, so he put his finger up to you and answered the it. You tried to continue to kiss him but he eventually pushed you off and went into another room to take the call else where. Pouting, you crossed your arms and sighed before jumping up and going in your drawer to change into a red lingerie set he bought for you a few months ago. You walked to the mirror and smiled, messing with your hair before jumping back in the bed. You watched the clock as five minutes pass and you hear Chris sigh and enter the room again, tossing his phone on the nightstand.

He looks up at you and smiles, his eyes scanning your body and admiring the view he had. You get up and walk towards him and grab his hand trying to get him back to the bed.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not feeling it anymore babe, he said it's all just bullshit and there's no point in me suing because she doesn't have anything that could be beneficial to me" you pushed him back into the door and ran your finger down his chest. "Look we can do this some other time okay? I'm just not feeling it right now" He looked down at you and moving your hand away, he knew you weren't one to give up. So you took it a step further and stepped close to him and brought your mouth to his neck and kissed it, slowly making your way down. As you kissed his neck you sucked a love bite right into his skin, he pushed you away once again and held his distance between you two.

"Babe, I said stop. I'm not in the mood anymore. Later okay? I promise" he held out his pinky to you and you shook your head and pushed his back against the wall and ran your fingers along the trim of his pants and you unbuttoned them, pulling them down to his ankles. Using both your hands you grabbed onto his briefs and tugged them down his legs. You bit down onto your lip, as you got down onto your knees and looked up at him. You grabbed his length with your hands and gave it a few slow, you watched as he bit his lip and ran his fingers through your hair.

You have him a seductive glare as your tongue barely licked the tip, teasing him further. Swirling your tongue around him, he began to get impatient "stop fucking playing y/n" you playfully rolled your eyes and gave in, slowly took him in as far as you could. He was well endowed. "....fuck baby" his hand tightened around your hair and you watched as he threw his head back against the wall. You bobbed your head, his hand helping you get to a pace that would send him over the edge. You loved hearing Chris moan, it was one of the best sounds you ever heard from him. You pulled away from him with a loud pop and you began jerking him off as his moans got louder. "fuck... fuck.. oh shit" It only encouraged you to keep going, he pushed himself away from the wall trying to get you to stop, but you pushed him back letting your hands trail up his abs and sucking harder. His mouth dropped open as you decided to take him all the way, and hold him there, after sitting there for a second you began to bob your head again but this time faster, while stroking the rest that wouldn't fit. You felt his legs jerk a bit, about to give in on him. Deciding enough was enough, you slowly pulled away from him as you let your teeth lightly graze the tip. You stood up and wiped your mouth, satisfied. "Bed... now" you smiled and walked over to the bed and laid down staring at him.

Hé climbed over you and your breathing hitched as he leaned down to kiss you. One of your hands went to caress his cheek, he slapped it away and shook his head. "Nah, you don't get to touch me, matter fact..." he reached over and opened your dresser and brought out the handcuffs you bought last weekend. He grabbed both your wrists and handcuffed them to the headboard. He laughed and smiled. "no tapping out when I get started, and no running" he leaned back in and immediately attached his lips to your neck and sucked harshly leaving you gasping. He smiled against your skin and let his fingers trail down to your chest. Attaching his fingers under the fabric, he ripped it off of your body and tossed it to the side of the bed. "Chriiiisss!!" You whined and pouted. "That was my favorite one!" He shrugged and lowered himself lower on the bed, you watched as his hands tucked themselves in the hem of your panties and pull them down your legs, you closed your legs to the sudden cold air you were exposed to. His maintained his eye contact as he spread your legs open and held his hands under the bend of your knees and pushed your legs up towards your chest. "Okay y/n you know the deal, don't try to push me away, cause it'll only get worse" you nodded frantically "okay daddy" he groaned at the name and dipped his head between your legs. He used his index and middle finger to spread your lower lips open, licking his lips and gliding his tongue across your sensitive bud.

He waisted no time attaching his lips to your clit, tugging it slightly causing you to moan. "Mmmmn... fuck baby" you tugged at your restraints and writhed beneath his touch. He smirked and one of his hands went up to your chest and let his thumb glide around your nipple. He traced his name out with his tongue against your warmth, and dipped his tongue into your entrance. His eyes closed and eyebrows knitted together at how wet you were for him. Pushing your legs further apart he began thrusting his tongue in and out of you, making you bite down on your lip trying to get your hands out of the cuffs. He locked eyes with you while he flattened his tongue and guided it up and down your slit. Arching your back off the bed, your moans and pants filled the room, Chris encouraging you to be as loud as you want.

He took two of his fingers and slid them inside you, all while sliding his tongue continued thrusting, he made his fingers search around for your g-spot. "Uuhhhhn, oh FUCK" you howled out when he found it. He did a 'come hither' motion with his finger and curled them right into that spot. You felt the heat rising in your stomach, signaling your orgasm was near. "Ooooooo, YES, fuuuuuuck Chris Im c-cumming" you warned thinking he'd stop but he only fingered you harder. You screamed out his name and squirted, desperately trying to close your legs. He latched onto your clit and sucked harshly making slurping noises as he cleaned you up. Your body felt weak after that, and you weren't sure if your could go on anymore. He lifted his head up, and you looked at him while his lips and chin glistened, he brought himself back up and kissed you while spreading your legs apart once again.

He sat up on his knees and bit down on his lip, slowly stroking himself. He moved in closer to you and tapped himself against your clit causing you to moan and try to squeeze your legs closed. He did it a few more time before he pulled your hips close and up to his and buried himself deep inside you. "Oh god...." you breathed out and tried to scoot yourself away from him a bit. "I haven’t even started and you already running from me" he chuckled and used both his hands to hold your hips in place, as he teased as he started a slow grind into you and watched as your eyes fluttered closed. He continued this for a few moments until he pulled away and slammed himself back into your wetness, pausing to untie your hands, and you grabbing onto his sides. He began fucking you like it would be his last time. Pulling your hips to his to meet with every thrust. The feeling of fullness and the perfect stretch you’d been waiting for made you scream and yell every time he slid back in. "Uuuuhnn! Fuck. YES! C-Chriiissss" you whined as tears began to blur your vision. The house was silent and the room was filled with skin to skin contact and his low grunts and your loud moans.

He moved one of his hands from your hips and brought it up to your neck, as he started to go harder and digging deeper as if he was wanting you to squirt. He started swiveling his hips into yours, sending you over the edge. Your screams started to become less hearty and tears started sliding down your face as he added a little more pressure around your throat. "Come on... I know you wanna squirt for daddy" he leaned down and said in your ear, triggering what he wanted. No sooner than he said that, your body shook and your murmured curses under your breath as you squirted on his lower abdomen. You brought your hands to his hips and tried to push him away, he grabbed your wrist. "Stop running from this dick y/n" he had sweat trickling down his face and chest, he leaned into give you a much needed kiss, you whimpered and wrapped your legs around his waist, switching positions so you were now on top.

Biting down on your lip, your slid yourself back down onto his length, moaning in the process. He put his hands behind his head and watched you intensely as your hands rested on his chest and you began to slowly move your hips up and down. You cursed under your breath, and dig your fingers into his chest. "Nah, ou better take all this shit" he said pushing your hips all the way down to his, and leaving them there. You squealed and adjusted yourself, and began to ride him. His mouth dropped open when you started bouncing on his lap and swirling your hips around. You mentally applauded yourself for having him speechless. Normally it would be hard for you to even get your way. He sat up and brought his hands to your ass and squeezed, as you paused to sit on your knees leaning down to kiss his neck. You were now lying on top of him and bit down into his neck, twerking on his dick. You didn’t take it easy on him, you made sure every time your hips came down with a loud smack. "Fuck! Fuck! Damn baby" he moaned out and grabbed your hips, starting to slam your hips harder down onto his dick. Your moans were muffled since your face was buried in his neck.

He flipped you both over "Face down, ass up baby girl" you turned on your stomach, and arched your back the way he liked it and he slipped right back into you. Teasing you once again and giving you slow but hard strokes. You sighed and moved your hips back into his to meet his pace. His eyes closed in pure bliss as he grabbed your hips and started going harder. "Mmmmn, fasted daddy" your voice was hoarse from all the screaming you had been doing, but he obeyed and fucked you faster. He pounded into you harder, causing you to become mute. Once again silence filled the room as all can be heard was how wet your were. You reached your hand between your legs and rubbed yourself, trying to get your orgasm to come now. His hips began to stutter, as his thrusts became sloppy, signaling his was about to cum. You took this to your advantage and grabbed his hands and you began to throw your ass back against him. He let out a throaty moan and his eyebrows knitted together, legs becoming weak as you squeezed yourself around him. His eyes rolled back, and he pulled out of you, turning you on your back and burying himself deep in your and giving you a few more strokes making you and him cum at the same time. He panted and collapsed onto you, the bed basically soaked in your juices.

You brought your face to his and the two of you began a make out frenzy, feeling overstimulated he tried to wiggle himself out of you, but you locked him in place, locking your legs around his waist. He whimpered and shook his head. "baby please let me go" his voice raspy, you accidentally clenched around him and he hissed, and let out a drawn out moan. Moving away from you, and lying on his back next to you. "I hope I can get you mad more... the aggressive side of you is what I love in bed" you laughed and draped your leg over his, he chuckled and shook his head and yawned. "I love you baby" his sleepy voice took over and his eyes were heavy. He kissed the top of your head before his breathing starting to level out. "Thank you" you smiled and congratulated yourself "you’re welcome... knocked ya ass right out"

"Mmmmhmm" he groaned and stretched, wrapping his arms around you and drifting off to sleep, no longer letting this case hover over him.