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cosmicalily · 3 months

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nayeon - 'na' mini album review + ranking

'something' - when i heard the audio teaser for this, i was immediately SO excited. then when i heard the start of this song, i was even more excited. 'SAY MY NAME' who?? that guitar SCREAMS iconic y2k track. i love this genre for twice (see basics & rush) and i feel like the way this track was produced works SO well for the overall vibe of the album. liquid drum and bass (at least the very simple, dreamy style of it) has become almost a bit overdone in my opinion due to the newjeansification of kpop (not dealing with that here) but the use of the guitar in the background gives it that iconic y2k feeling similar to destiny's child and tlc. i think overall this is a really easy to listen to track, however i definitely did expect a little more from it after listening to the audio snippet. would've loved more of the nayeon rap because that's what i was most excited for!

'count it' - this is so dreamy, it reminds me a bit of 'wishing on you' from jihyo's solo album, which is one of my favs. i love a slow nayeon song that solely focuses on her super sweet, smooth vocals and i feel like it's nice to hear her lower voice for a change too, especially bc jyp absolutely makes her (and jihyo) work overtime with those high ass adlibs in their group songs. this was honestly everything i wanted from this song; slow, an easy listen, beautiful, minimal production that still doesn't feel boring or repetitive, and that ending was honestly my fave thing EVER! could listen to it on repeat, and most definitely will. it felt like the perfect outro song for this album too.

'magic' - that prechorus is SO delicious oh my god! nayeon and julie is literally giving the kpop version of every iconic collab in the 2010s between an insane vocalist and badass rapper (i'm thinking nikki minaj, ariana grande, iggy azalea before she got cancelled lol) however, i actually don't love the chorus as much as i was hoping! it definitely fits the vibe of the song but i feel like it didn't entirely live up to my expectations for it. of course, julie's vocals are absolutely insane, i'll never not go on about them, and nayeon absolutely ate! i feel like this track again matches the late 2000s vibes i'm getting from the album, with a little more this would have 110% been my favourite song.

'abcd' - NAYONCE WHO??? i'm actually not joking at all, this was absolutely what the kpop industry needed. that very typical young, teenager-y y2k concept has honestly been entirely overdone (yk what i'm talking about, every girl group and their mother's been a victim of it welp) so i'm SO GLAD that icons like kiss of life and now nayeon have decided to bring back mature y2k! we need trashy! we need camp! we need intense instrumentals and sassy raps and lyrics! pop was so cute and i adore it for her, but i love seeing the more adult concept for nayeon too, esp bc she's almost 30 now and i feel like she needed something a little more. this feels very very very much like crazy in love by beyonce, which kind of does unsettle me a little, it's not a bad thing but that song is VERY iconic so it feels like a very tricky song to try and replicate even when its done a bit differently, because there's always gonna be comparisons regardless and a song like that just cannot be outdone, no matter how iconic nayeon is. however, it's different to all the recent releases we've had in kpop so imma let it slide. also, i was VERY disappointed by the fact that this track, the TITLE TRACK, was less than three minutes. why tf are ALL of the bsides longer?? the math is not mathing. i was really hoping short song syndrome wouldn't hit 3rd gen kpop but apparently it has, which is actually so sucky. also i highkey hate jyp's promotion methods bc y'all did NOT need to spoil the entire chorus?? like i would've enjoyed this so much more if it was a suprise yk. that felt like a really dumb move especially when there wasn't even a super different crazy end chorus so that felt like a bad decision but oh well. solid title track, 9/10 (-2 for the shortness of the song and promotions). and final thoughts, i feel like jihyo also would've eaten this concept up. after seeing namoji perform 10 minutes, i've been needing them to do a song as a subunit and i feel like this would've fitted them as a trio SO well.

'halligalli' - she's cute, she's bubbly, but not too childish either. she JUST fits into this album's concept in my opinion, and it feels like the classic twice bside recipe (this isn't a bad thing, but it does sound like something i've heard before from twice and it fits into their discography well). however, sticking to the classics isn't a bad thing at all, often if you have all new genres an album can feel daunting and too diverted from the identity you felt the artist was originally showing. so i think this is a very safe but cute track. it'll go on my playlist, but i feel like she's a tiny bit forgettable.

'butterflies' - can someone explain to me why this wasn't on the 'im nayeon' album? because this SCREAMS that concept. it's super cute and very nayeon-esque, but i feel like it takes away from the more mature concept this album was leaning towards? it feels very teenage y2k lovesong, which is super cute, but this album was gearing more towards iconic y2k artists in their adult prime so i feel like this doesn't quite resonate with that. i'll definitely listen to it because it's a good track, but probably not in conjunction with the rest of the album since it doesn't fit my mental vibe for it lmao.

'heaven' - out of the two slow tracks, 'count it' was honestly my favourite. i think its also because this song was fully english and it felt like an overload of entirely english songs in this album, which is lowkey weird for me to say as an international fan, but it feels like twice is trying too hard to globalise its audience and is forgetting about their initial fanbase. like twice has been doing one english track in their albums for a bit now, but even the title track for this album was very english heavy and so were most of the bsides. three out of six bsides were english, and the others still have a lot of english lyrics. anyways, it just didn't stick out to me as much as the other songs, still very sweet and nice to listen to but not particularly outstanding in my eyes. it'll definitely end up on my playlist though!

let me know your opinions on this comeback. i personally adore this image for nayeon and think it was overall a solid album!

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iampikachuhearmeroar · 1 year

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every time I read about shitty landlords and read all the bullshit comments defending landlords for never going for social housing tenants I get so fucking angry. which, for a reminder to everyone: you are only ever one two pay day/s or paycheck/s away from homelessness or some other major life altering change for the worst... meaning you'll be next in line on the 10 year waiting list for social housing in my state of australia, new south wales.

because yeah, dgmw- a select few may or do leave properties in significant disrepair or completely ruin them.... I've seen the damage both on TV.... and through my cadetship in social housing last year. also heard about damage through that program, too, from both the workers where I was and the other people in the program etc etc. because for many people, esp if they've been long-term homeless for an extended period of time, they may not know how to live in a home or actively feel safe in a home and other things. it was our job, where i was working, to connect them with services to sustain their tenancies and help them live better lives.

but over the last year working in social housing, I learnt to hate landlords, even more than i already did previously. most especially the horrendous type of landlord that thinks they can just walk into their tenants' property at will, any time they want..... for idek.... just to "check they're stacking their plates right in MY cupboards. all day. every day. ".... or the like, which is a statement that was sneered down the phone..... not even considering time for ANY notice of inspection or entry.... entirely ignoring the tenants' privacy and "right to quiet enjoyment" which is stated in new south wales tenancy law and tenancy agreements.

we had to frequently remind these types of assholes that they could NOT enter the property without permission from the tenant (eg for repairs) or also us (inspections, repairs etc); or without express notice to the tenant, from themselves; or the real estate (repairs and inspections.... again sometimes in partnership with us). or also, in an emergency situation, they could enter the property for obvious reasons.

EVERYONE has EVERY fucking right to fucking hate landlords... and MOST ESPECIALLY when quite a few of them want to play with peoples lives like they're disposable toys. just invade privacy whenever they fucking want for funsies.... all bc apparently "oh no. MY PROPERTY may be damaged from this tenant not stacking plates to MY standard of presentation!!!!!! let me just enter their house- no. sorry. MY house - while they're at work, without asking them.... and then tell them some time later down the track. checkmate." and other bizarre utter bullshit excuses these assholes had.... and that i've also seen on my area's uni buy and sell page, when people have posted about their nightmare landlords over the years; looking for legal advice.

just. i fucking hate landlords. and tbh, I'm so glad I left that job. it was Too Much™️ dealing with these asshole landlords and their fucked up mind game ass questions and the mind games they wanted to play with their tenants and US.... always trying to tell any of the workers that I transferred them to on the phone, that "i'll ALWAYS know more about tenancy than YOU. because i've been a landlord for 30 years. what do YOU know???" no. the fuck. you do NOT know about MODERN tenancies, vernon or madeira. you need a real fucking job..... instead of thinking it's fun to have an express avenue to snoop into peoples lives in your free time. maybe brush up on CURRENT tenancy law, and don't pull the weird shit that you were pulling back in the 90s.... which was probably still fucked up borderline illegal or fully illegal landlord behaviour bullshit, in the 90s, anyway.

but hey. what the fuck do I know??? I was born in the mid-90s. more than likely, i will NEVER own a house of my own... or probably will never even move out of home... because of your bullshit gatekeeping of property: always raising rents and property prices.... and/or wasting actually useable and valuable living spaces for air bnbs and so-called "investment properties."

#life #about me #shut up ilona #i kept it all anonymous and used fake names #turned reblogs off bc i think this might blow up and i dont want ti #*dont want it to end up on any reddit boards or on the tumblr pages on fb or tiktok or w/e other social media #just in case anyone from my old work sees it and figures out its me

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tinyetoile · 1 year

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Ty for the correction on the misinformation about Ken Penners. Also if you are ever open I would LOVE to hear your insights into how botw link's stoicism in response to his trauma detracts from Zelda's characterisation?

(personally I always found that it sold the isolation between the two of them more. He can barely even express his emotions towards her. She is reaching out, she is trying so damn hard, and yet he cannot reach out to meet her. Just like with her father. Just like with the goddess. She tries the best she can, and it is just NEVER enough.)

(I also think this is why post awakening Link is more expressive in what we see of him being expressive - he doesn't have all his memories back, he isn't living constantly with the knowledge that if he slips he'll fail. It's why BOTW link succeeds where his last self failed - He's no longer terrified of feeling. Of reaching out. Zelda reaches out to him, and she succeeds. She talks to him, she guides him, and together they achieve victory. Despite everything, despite all the failure and the pain, they succeed.)

(like don't get me wrong it's not Spirit Tracks w/ Zelda literally possessing a phantom in order to protect Link, and Link being SO excited to drive a train for her, but like. Idk I would love to hear your side bc you always have such insightful thoughts and I really respect and value your opinions, esp on this stuff!!)

(also spirit tracks is the best loz game bc it let Zelda just fuckin. Chill out. She just hung out w/ link it's great. They just vibe at the train)

LOL part of my motivation for correcting the Ken Penders thing is that usually when I see people "correct" it, they ALSO attribute it to the wrong person? Like I'll see people say "Ian Flynn designed Scourge!" but while he WAS the writer for the issue where Scourge came to be, he wasn't the one who came up with the design- that was Patrick.

I also don't play Sonic. Why I know these things is beyond me. As for the Zelda thing, well...

I ended up taking a lil while to reply to this because I was having trouble getting my thoughts in order about it and putting those thoughts into words. I wanna preface this by saying: I absolutely agree with your angle here, and one of my main problems (personally) is that I simultaneously know what they were trying to do with the characters, while also not having that come across to me in the moment at all.

Because like, I genuinely think that Link's muteness and stoicism being a trauma response is an incredible idea. It's a genius way to incorporate his "silent protagonist" schitck in-universe, and provides depth to his character in doing so. However, the problem is that in execution, it doesn't come across that way.

The best comparison I can come up with is how, when the hunger games movies came out, everyone was complaining about the lead actress's performance and how she never emoted, but in actuality she was giving a very book accurate performance- Katniss was the type of character who never showed her emotions on her face. And this was fine in the books, but when the medium was changed to film, rather than having that come across, people just thought the acting was bad.

That's the same feeling that Link's stoicism gives me, the way it's presented comes across as less "forcing himself to silently bear these burdens and never let them show to anyone so he can be a pillar of strength" and more "no thoughts head empty while other people are talking".

And the reason I think this detracts from Zelda's character is because I think one of the two big yardsticks for measuring Zelda's quality as a character is: how well the game sells her relationship with Link (not in a romantic sense btw). I don't inherently ship the two, and will thus not be interested in their relationship simply because they're Link and Zelda. I need to be convinced on a bond between them every new incarnation. But the reason it's Zelda's character that's dependant on this is because Link is the player character that we spend time with, so even if he's completely nothing, we still get attached to him by virtue of having him be how we interact with the world. But Zelda is restricted to her interactions with Link, or at least what Link sees of her, so even if Zelda has tons of character, if I'm not convinced on her relationship with Link, makes her feel worse to me.

This is why I think ST Zelda and SS Zelda are the best ones: They convince you that Link and Zelda are friends, that they care about eachother, that they enjoy eachother's company, that they'd hang out even outside of their assigned roles as "Hero" and "Princess", and it's Link's reactions to her that sell it.

In ST, they start out as strangers, but you spend the entire game watching them grow closer to eachother, become friends, and what makes it work is that it's not JUST Zelda who's selling you on this relationship, it's Link's reactions to her, the little laugh he gives after she possesses a Phantom for the first time, their amazing silly high-five after beating Byrne, the way his first reaction after having her land on him was to smile because she'd gotten her body back- can you imagine how weird the game would feel if Link never emoted?

In SS, this incarnation of Link is easily the most expressive "adult" Link, and they use this to show you how much he cares for Zelda. You IMMEDIATELY know what his relationship with her is like from the way he smiles at her wake-up letter alone. Even if the game didn't tell you they're childhood friends, you'd be able to know because the nature of their relationship comes through in every single interaction they have with one another.

Meanwhile in BotW, they tried SO HARD to give Zelda depth and these interesting aspects to her character and her relationship to her role as a princess, and then her interactions with Link fall flat and it drags her down so badly, especially because this relationship is supposed to be the focal point of the game. It ruins the entire climax of the final memory, where watching Link die unlocks her powers, because their relationship feels hollow to me, and as a result it makes Zelda feel weirdly... callous in this moment? Instead of coming across as desperation, as actually witnessing the atrocities of the calamity firsthand and finally tapping into her power because of it, I was left wondering if Zelda just didn't care about anybody outside of her assigned love interest at franchise. Which is absolutely not what I should have been feeling or what was trying to be conveyed, but was the taste the scene leaves in my mouth regardless.

I think what it ultimately boils to is: I really fucking hate the cutscene where Link saves Zelda from the Yiga, because that's where I think the ball was dropped. Allow me to explain. More than anything else, what should have been a massive turning point in Zelda's feelings for Link as they change from animosity to seeing him a new light, just comes across as hetero trite, where the writers just shortcut to "these characters are in love now" because one is a boy and the other is a girl so OBVIOUSLY we're supposed to assume a romance between them. It's like Zelda suddenly remembered they're supposed to be love interests because Link... did his job. Being her guard is his job, and protecting her like that is the reason he was following her around beforehand even when she didn't like it. It makes it feel like Zelda somehow never realized she was in danger before or something??? This image from OSP's romantic subplot trope talk almost perfectly encapsulates what I mean here:

The moment that SHOULD have been the turning point to their relationship should have been a moment where Zelda sees Link not acting as her stoic knight, a moment where she sees beneath the front he's put up to protect himself and realize they might actually be able to get along and that she's been projecting onto him and being harsh. Because Link being a seemingly flawless knight is one of the causes of her own insecurities and why she can't stand him at first, so having Link perfectly embodying that idea should not be what makes her fall for him!!! It should be the opposite! I hate this cutscene so much!

And even though the rest of the memories are spent trying to build this relationship, the fact that this was what made Zelda go from hard tsun to instant dere just sours the rest of their interactions for me. Not to mention the implication, if you get all the memories, that after everything Link just... goes back to being Zelda's silent, stoic knight? Which feels worse the more I think about it.

This probably ended up pretty incoherent and I'm also probably wrong about a lot of things, but the main thing is that, while I understand (and even like!) what they intended to do with Link and Zelda in theory, it doesn't come across (TO ME) in practice, so the whole thing is at odds with itself in my head. In the end I'm pretty sure this is just a me problem though, and probably me trying to rationalize why a character I should, by all rights, really like, just doesn't click for some reason.

BTW somewhat off topic but the second yardstick I have for measuring the quality of Zeldas is "how divorced is she from being a dignified princess" because the less dignified Zelda is, the better. ST is another good, emblematic one here because Zelda's freak-out completely shatters any such perception of her and immediately makes you attached to her, while her predecessor Tetra kinda falls flat in the last part of WW because the instead she transforms from "Tetra" to "Zelda" she immediately loses all of her character and becomes a demure dignified princess who waits to be kidnapped by Ganondorf (though thankfully she recovers some of her personality in the final battle and for the sequel). This is also why I don't care for TP Zelda as said before: We don't see her outside of her capacity as "dignified princess", though that's also because she has like five minutes of screentime, three of which are spent on exposition.

Even more off topic but man, it really sucks that WW and ST are the only games that have Zelda actually fight the final boss alongside you? I'm so shocked that this didn't immediately become the series standard for every game afterwards because it's so good.

Sorry for all this negativity, but also thank you so much for allowing me to exorcise this demon from my body.

#loz ramblings #negative #obviously these are all just my personal experiences and so on #i know that im an outlier here with how i interpreted things #i will stand by that link doing his job as a bodyguard should not have been what made zelda change her thoughts on him tho #i made myself hungry writing all this LMAO

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ess-presso · 2 years

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hi ess! <3 im back🕺

ur so right the universe ships wolfstar. i also saw regulus when stargazing but he was too far away from sirius to be in the picture💔 one day reg, one day.

ALSO happy late lily evans day <3 cant believe i missed her bday. rip lily u wouldve loved taylor swift❤️

tay time! mr perfectly fine, message in a bottle, & last kiss <3

chat time!

i dont think i could force myself to sit through dwd, ive learned enough abt it via osmosis and thats enough for me tbh.

THEY SERIOUSLY DO TAKE PICS OF TREES AND CLOUDS!! it baffles me. like sure maybe the clouds looked particularly nice and i understand that canada has some big ass trees but be fr. also i swear someone was taking a pic of a fucking pigeon once.

ur so right id also lose my mind over a red sock in my laundry. i think thatd be the final straw for me.

i think i have to agree ben barnes' smile in podg is very sirius. dorian gray IS sirius in the same way paul from dune is reg. no joke i almost called paul regulus to my dad the other day. not my finest moment❤️

godspeed on ur exam, u got this💪 drunk procrastinators never lose.

I DID SEE THAT VIDEO OF THE PERSON BITING THE TERRYS ORANGE!! i swear ive never been so mad before. also toblerone def is an essential drunk snack for sure.

that moment sounds so sweet, and it was raining too????? thats literally perfect. no matter how hard i could try i know liv would never dance to jazz w me. definitely considering revoking her best friend status right about now. but its fine because i know shed dance w me to taylor and 1d so that makes up for it <3

geoguessr can be so hard sometimes especially when its in america. like i swear unless its a city with signs i can never get it. like how am i supposed to know that this big ass field was kentucky and not fucking iowa.

L best friends for the win!!!!!! but ur right they lucked out too cause we're incredibly cool so good for them<3

maybe one day my negative rizz will pay off but ur right. until then i'll kick back with my wine & books & fanfics cause thats all i need in life. & damn cursing victoria to fail her exams, u know what thats so valid she deserves it.

likeafunerall's art is SO GOOD. so good. im obsessed with her character designs theyre just so perfect. and omg yes u should totally put them up on ur wall itll look so good. AND YES I SAW THE SOLDIER POET KING ART!!! its so good i cant. likeafunerall never misses.

I SAW THAT APPLETV AD YESTERDAY! i was freaking out like i swear appletv is doing this on purpose.

work song is simply so good. id KILL to see hozier live and for him to perform that song.

if i talk to caesar ill let u know. he was stabbed ~23 times so id say thats on par with a jesus style betrayal (esp since brutus was his close friend) rip julius i do hope u got a lil kiss before they maimed u<3

is alex turner psychic??? thats so funny.

omg not the famous 1975 concert featuring taylor swift.....id be utterly heartbroken. and right?? harry canada exists too u know..... i had tickets to love on tour before covid but then it was cancelled and then he fully REMOVED THE SHOW when he started touring again and now the closest one is in america. sorry harry but i dont love u enough to go to america.

dressing in red and gold is so gryffindor of u. i wear a lot of green so that tracks ig.

dw cruel summer will forever be my fav scream-at-the-top-of-ur-lungs song. its just perfect. dbm simply isnt that kind of song.

omg only ch2 of cr.... i am praying for u . but dont worry its SO good. like yes its heartbreaking but so worth it. i honestly miss the earlier chapters everything was so simple </3

rome is definitely the city of piss and gladiators. i guess not much has changed since antiquity !!

when people are blocking the hall and im just done with them i usually take it upon myself to barrel through them or give them dirty looks (sorry people but i have places to be MOVEW PLEASE)

two middle names is so cool u have options. u can change it up whenever u want u know.

UNCLE MOONY :((((((((

winter <3 and yes i hate when people call it fall. like autumn is such a pretty word. fall is literally so lame . so many people call it fall here and i hate it. its autumn!!!!!!! >:(

good luck on ur chem exam !! telepathically sending all my academic energy to u rn. dont forget to channel the patron saint of academic achievement, remus lupin. AND FUCK PHYSICS!!!!!

coins are so cool. i have one from Iran from 1950 that i got in my change from kfc and its so cool. and a paddington coin??? omg thats so cute.

unicorns and phoenixes are so cool fr. & u know who to call if u ever get bit by a basilisk!

bookstore dates are ideal fr. but only if the other person likes books (but also red flag if they dont......i am not wasting my time on someone who doesnt like books)

stealing money from the bank in monopoly is so real. i used to bribe the banker whenever i got desperate and it never ended well. and yes learn chess!! its so fun and it makes u feel smart.

yes van gogh recreations! she is so cool tbh. now if only i inherited even an ounce of her artistic ability and maybe id be satisfied. and cafe terrace at night is just so pretty. so peaceful and serene. i can imagine quiet jazz playing in the street while u look up at the stars. its so pretty.

OH NOOO sorry abt ur bio exam☹️ (<-girl what the hell is that i justwanted to use an emoji.....anyways) hope ur chem exam goes better!! & bakery + taylor is very good combo. proven to cure all ails.

and omg ur so right. picking out books for each other and then annotating them??? that is SO CUTE!!!!! SO CUTE! u get me.

hozier is completely in my bones too he lives there. i wanna get a hozier tattoo someday too he consumes me fr.

i love being a sports anti!! (badminton ur on thin fucking ice. )

yes proud italian over here🇮🇹💪 i love pasta sm. and omg portuguese?? thats so cool. ive always wanted to visit portugal. ive never actually had portuguese food & i really wanna try it now.

reg is SUCH a black cat. & james absolutely sings horribly in the shower and everyone is so tired of him. sirius prob does too but remus secretly loves it <3 jily night owl-early bird has my heart fr. also the james never getting hungover hc is so funny like Yes. he would get blackout drunk and then wake up at the asscrack of dawn the next day for quidditch practice, thank u.

dorlene forever. sorry peter but those women are gay. and idk how to feel abt reg/remus. ig if its written well its not bad but it feels almost wrong. at least their ship name (moonwater i think) is kinda cute.

i agree the patronuses are quite slytherin but def also ravenclaw (i have gotten ravenclaw multiple times when i take the test so ig thats my secondary house)

luna <3 shes just so cool and i love her funky sense of style.

yes dairy queen is ice cream! but also burgers and stuff too. but theyre known for their ice cream which is so good. if u ever visit north america i recommend.

omg barrs cream soda!!!! ive had that before from a lil british food shop i found & it was so good. better than canadian cream soda for sure.

q review:

this is me trying is so real. burnt out gifted kid syndrome hits like a truck.

omg a black swan that is so cool!! mysterious and shit fr.

my tears ricochet is such a good choice (& cruel summer) it hits every damn time.

ooo shapeshifting very good choice. just think of all the places u could get into by shapeshifting, celeb a-list parties?? the oscars?? buckingham palace?? ur set for life.

messy is so valid & i hate losing socks so mcuh like actually where the fuck did they go.

omg SMARTIES!!!!! i love smarties so much. they dont have them in america and i pity them. jaffa cakes are so good too.

shakespeare is such a good choice hes so cool. to meet The genius himself would be a dream.

work song FOREVERRRR

i love these hype songs. excellent hype vibes.

SNOW!! i love making snowmen sm. its actually snowing here as i type. idk what happened to the 10degree weather but yeah.

lady macbeth and macbeth !!!!! i love this. and omg i was OBSESSED with it in 2017 like OBSESSED. lemme try and guess who's who here.....u have said lu was taller than u so were u georgie? hoping im right.

answering qs:

fuck marlene, marry lily, kill pandora. i love pandora so much but i cant pass up an opportunity with marlene. sorry pandora <3

fuck reg, marry evan, kill barty. i think im too similar to reg to wanna marry him (although he is very wealthy.....) & evan seems like good marriage material so. also killing barty bc its funny.

what i like to spend my money on: mostly clothes and jewelry. and candles sometimes. omg and books how could i forget!!

inside joke with liv: we've got this dumb little handshake we've had since literally forever that we call the bunnyfish (long story, idek how to begin explaining it) im the bunny shes the fish. ive been trying to convince her to get matching bunny and fish tattoos FOREVER but to no success. ill get there someday!!

weird fear: maybe more of an irrational fear but i cannot lean against car doors while theyre moving cause what if it opens and i fall out on to the road and die. like what if. it plagues my life fr.

weirdest dare ive ever done: tbh i cant even remember. i usually pick truth cause my friends can be EVIL and i will not subject myself to their dares. they're never creative enough with their truth questions so its always something dumb like "darkest secret" or "who do u like"

worst impulse buy: luckily nothing huge, but i impulse buy random shit like nail polish or lipstick all the time. i have yet to buy something i fully regret but im sure the day will come!

fav quote ever: AHH okay this is such a good question. my absolute fav is from anne carson's an oresteia:

“Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.”

something about someone wanting to take care of u even when ur at ur worst just KILLS ME. RIPS me apart.

9. fav quote from a fic: this is a basic answer but i really love that line in atyd about james having an ego the size of a lake but a heart to match it. just <3 yes. i love that man so much. theres also a bunch of lines in just lovers by zar that are taken from little women that just kill me every time i read.

10. ever met a celeb: ive never spoken to any but i DID walk past seth rogen like a month ago. and i saw john mulaney with olivia munn over this past summer too it was jarring.

11. fav snack: theres this snack mix i love called humpty dumpty party mix and its SO good. (the cheese one specifically) its got mini pretzels and doritos and puffy cheetos and crunchy cheetos and these little cheesy hoop things in it and its delicious.

12. crush on anyone: (dw ur good i dont mind!) not atm! i think my standards are too high bc of fictional characters and celebs so people irl always pale in comparison. like if ur not james potter or lily evans or sirius black im not wasting my time its simple.

13. who knows me best: definitely liv. she is as much a part of me as i am of her and we can read each others minds. also my dad, im almost a carbon copy of him cause we have the same interests and sense of humour .

14. lover vs getaway car: lover. the hopeless romantic in me had to. i love getaway car but its gonna have to be lover <3

15. all time favourite moment: visiting italy and greece was a dream come true cause ive always wanted to visit since i was a little kid. since it was a school trip i was with my friends and liv ofc and i had the time of my life. seeing the parthenon irl and the colosseum in rome changed the trajectory of my life fr.

16. fav moment with liv: ive got many but one specific one thats really special to me was when i came out to her & fine line by harry styles was playing & she almost crashed the car cause she was crying (WITH HAPPINESS LOL) it was very funny. that song has a special place in my heart bc of that <3 i also love when we go for late night drives and blast music. or when when we go to the beach at sunset with a bottle of wine>>>

17. r(egg) vs r(edge): im a r(redge) truther idc. i know his name is rEGulus but i am Not calling him r(egg) it sounds like EGG!!!!! r(edge) forever.

18. languages: sadly english is the only one i fluently speak. i know some italian but im not fluent (i blame my dad, whos literally from italy but didnt fucking teach me his language. wtf man) i also know some spanish and very very minimal french. i can read basic norwegian as well(i was obsessed with SKAM in 2015 so i had to learn some) BUT in terms of reading, i can read ancient greek and a bit of latin. also aurebesh which is a writing system from star wars (massive fucking nerd alert)

qs for u!

fuck marry kill evan reg barty

fuck marry kill pandora lily marlene

how many languages do u speak?

fav gemstone/crystal/stone?

have u watched the new last of us show? (if u havent u should its SO good)

sea, forest, or mountains?

what was ur dream job when u were a kid?

whats a topic u could talk for hours about?

celeb crush(es)?

spotify or apple music? (or other if u dont use these)

fav constellation?

fav memory with lu?

whats one food u have always wanted to try?

thats all for now! if u see this before u take ur exam GOOD LUCK!!!! u got this. if u see this after i hope it went well. either way remus would be proud <3

-bee

bee beee beeeeeee !!!! <33333

“too far away from sirius to be in the picture.” fuck fuck fuck this is the cause of my DEATH. i died and this is why. (pls one day catch them in a pic together. one of us shall do this. new mission.)

I KNOW HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST MILF EVER <33333 (did you see theinvisiblemuseum’s fanart of lily ???? it’s so fucking good ???) & you’re right she would’ve so loved taylor swift (can imagine her dancing to lover with james)

tay tay <333

mr perfectly fine - JEGULUS - this song is fucking jegulus after they break up and regulus is all ‘you promised. you promised. you promised’ ‘Mr. "Leaves me all alone, " I fall apart// It takes everything in me just to get up each day’ IT’S LITERALLY HIMMMM. he left and regulus fucking shattered this is the TRUTH.

message in a bottle - JEGULUS - i’m thinking a celebrity au jegulus where they like date secretly or james is a fanboy then gets famous and reg writes a track for James’s movie (??? fic idea alert) AND I’M SO YES. THE MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE IS SUCH A REGULUS THING TO DO , TOO . (mr rab in a locket)

last kiss - JEGULUS / WOLFSTAR - this matches perfectly for both of them - except more wolfstar because in canon i think reg would’ve definitely known that they’d have a last kiss. and remus was the one who would’ve trusted him and all that shit. (and hello?? remus would so fuckin dance for sirius this is canon?? and wear his clothes after he’s in azkaban . )

fic rec for u (did i forget last time ?? i will not do this again , ‘tis a crime) - pink lemonade by moonysbookshelff (ft jegulus wolfstar rosekiller , with ace evan , and a happy ending , and also it’s a celeb au!!)

chatting !!!!

no because i’ve heard far too much of harry’s englishman accent when he’s yelling in some speech to sit through 2hrs of that shit.

“kids look this is a souvenir pic i took many years ago from my trip to london , the city of fashion & vibes.” “that’s a fucking pigeon mom.” (not a fucking pigeon why the fucking pigeon. no please no.)

but tbh pink is my favourite colour …. but i have too many shirts and trousers that i’d lose my mind to see as pink. so no thanks , no red socks today!!

YES OMG !!! podg ben barnes = sirius & dune tim = regulus !!!! this is canon major fucking canon !!!!!!!!! (it’s the smile and the facial expressions.) AND CALLING PAUL REGULUS THAT’S A CLOSE ONE . they might’ve found out the depths of your insanity then !!

yes yes godspeed but i did medium well on it. like everyone’s yapping on about the last q on the exam which they got like ‘4.35’ and i got 190 so idk. that’s like 2 marks i lost right then and there!!!

that lady should be arrested for war crimes. it was madness i tell you, MADNESS.

taylor and 1D over jazz , but you gotta try the jazz thing at least once. at least. it feels surreal, i’m telling you. this liz sounds so fucking cool high five to us dude we won the lottery of best friends.

wdym you didn’t know it was kentucky??? was there not a fucking colonel sanders standing right there ??? COLONEL SANDERS FOR THE WIN (i love kfc!) . this what i’m saying all fields look the same i can’t fuckin differentiate.

L & E // L & B —- > best motherfucking friends you will ever find ever. got the ‘married by 40’ pact with my dude too.

wine & books & fanfic > actual romantic satisfaction. alwaysssss. (i do not like her anymore. she’s consdescending as fuck. what the fuck do u mean ‘can’t believe u dk what a processor blah blah computer shit thingy is ??’ BITCH CAN U TELL ME WHAT A FUCKING KETONE IS ???? i thought not.)

i’m so obsessed with likeafuneralls art. she’s drawn the first art of xenophilius lovegood i’ve ever seen and looking at it i was like ‘damn now i understand how pandora got locked down.’ ALRIGHT OKAY THEY’LL GO UP ON MY WALLS NOW. (you’re literally so right likeafunerall literally never misses her art is fucking ETHEREAL.)

IK IK THEY ARE . ESPECIALLY THE TIMMY AND GARY OLDMAN THING I WAS LIKE ‘SIRIUS AND REG SIRIUSANDREG.’ this like when andrew and ben barnes met (have u seen that photo pls say yes it’s life changing as fuck.)

me too i really want to go to a fuckin hozier concert i rlly think my life would be changed. like it would be.

on a slightly related note- have u seen the jesusxjudas edits??? they’re fr making me all emotional like damn jesus knew and he was all ‘fine I sacrifice myself if u kiss me u lil bitch’ . & yes i hope brutus gave him a little eye contact at the very least. like something intense.

HE IS PSYCHIC. I swear it. i love it.

i was so fuckin heartbroken it was unreal and my heart was a bunch of tosh for like three days. harry thinks only usa exists . like hello??? what abt canada ?? AHAT ABOUT YOUR ROOTS??? ENGLAND ??? LONDON??? MANCHESTER??? I don’t care about u enough to go to the usa for u (i’d only do that for ZAYN.)

we dress like our houses as we should (currently in red pjs because it’s 9:00am and my exam is at 1:30 so i don’t have to leave until like 12:30.)

cruel summer just fuckin hits right yk??? it just does it’s like i ascend to heaven . ( ‘GRINNING LIKE A DEVIL’ is my national anthem fr)

😀😀😀😀 i’m very scared now ! very ! but i shall power through because i am no stranger to pain! yay!

piss & gladiators ong. that’s such a funny sentence though fr ‘piss and gladiators’ .

next time i’ll deck them in their motherfuckin faces. not kidding. was nearly late to my exam because of them. but I’ll just give them detention because as a higher-up , i can do that! so very good!! college student gives the lil bitches in the corridors detention !! more at 7!

yessss i can switch it up. when i get lu to pick me up and i’m taking a lil too long to get ready he just full names me and i’m THERE. but ess is good for me honestly it’s all smooth and stuff.

UNCLE MOONY :((((( (*sobs*)

IT’S AUTUMN. AUTUMN . this is truth. nothing else is true but this. (winter is bae.)

AHHHHH THANK U SM !!!!!! I AM GRACIOUSLY ACCEPTING THIS ENERGY OH MY GODDDD. i will challenge mr lupin through myself i will. (fuck physics !!)

just be loyal to dumpydumpster and fawkes will come through !!! (unicorns & phoenixes 5ever!!)

nah this is so real of u don’t waste ur time on non-book lovers book lovers only pls and thank u everyone else fuck off you aren’t good enough.

stealing money from the bank yesssss. hut unfortunately lu is the banker and he’s just as competitive so he will not budge AT. ALL. all right this friday i’m getting lu to teach me that’s it.

cafe terrace at night walk by with your bf/gf and hold their hand and ahhh melttttt . And jazz would so be a part of this experience i agree !!!

I AM ALSO SORRY ABOUT MY BIO EXAM. but i put something down for every q and that’s a fuckin achievement. honestly . the brownie was vv good plus a walk and taylor , solved so many of my problems honestly.

WE GOTTA FIND SOMEONE TO DO THIS WITH ISTG. annotating books with shi like ‘you’d do this’ making me cry and that.

hozier is me. i is him. we are one. imagine having a song written about u by hozier. like i’d straight up keel over and DIE.

Sports suck !! (badminton and sometimes cricket watching me . and also lu. )

AHAHA ITALIAN YESSSS. portugal is fucking amazing . there’s a little church up in portugal (sanctuary of out lady fatima) and it’s my peace place honestly . feeling so much less worry when i’m there. if u go to portugal that is a must!!! AND so is algarve. algarve is also home <333 I miss it now :) THE FOOD IS AMAZING , YESSS!!! you must try pastel de nata !!! (egg custard tarts!!!) i really love them they’re so fucking good.

REG AS A BLACK CAT IS THE ONLY HC THAT MATTERS HONESTLY. I love it so so much. and james as a horrible shower singer ???? canon fr. (i adore jily night owl/early bird so fucking much it’s like a release i adore it so much they had that for a little while at least!) JAMES HAS MAGICAL POWERS FR FR !!!! i wish i had them too damn me with headaches and shit.

yes they’re lesbians if i’ve ever seen them. and moonWATER???? that’s fucking HARSH ??? (i’d read a oneshot maybe. maybe.)

my secondary house is slytherin !!! and oh my god that’s literally so cool i just have the one patronus!!

luna luna luna i’m just as sane as her she gets me fr.

I’m literally so jealous of so many American restaurants. i want dairy queen now damn. if i ever come there i will go to dairy queen and i’m very excited for that.

barrs cream soda is literally bae it’s so good (though it used to be 39p and now it’s 59p ???? rip off asf but i’d still buy it )

i’m an ex-gifted kid now try-hard

IK IT IS MYSTERIOUS AS FUCK

mtr kills me . i’m in a battlefield every time i hear that song fr. (cruel summer is a close second <33)

one second i am timmy tim at the oscars next i am one of the queen’s corgis!!!!! the opportunities are endless

they went into the fucking vacuum of the earth or something where else WHY DOES IT HAPPEN. WHY DO YOU GO. STAY???

smarties and jaffa cakes >>> shitty american chocolate

it would be a dream. I have so many questions and he’s the only one who could ever answer that.

work song. work song. work song.

THEY GET ME ALL BOPPING WHILE I’M GETTING DRESSED AND STUFF.

it’s SNOWING??? lucky asf tell me if it’s enough for a snowman at the very least.

WE THOUGHT WE WERE SO SMART BECAUSE WE KNOW MACBETH BY HEART having studied it and all!! (AND I KNEW YOU’D GUESS THAT. i was it & he was georgie and that’s what was so funny because he’s taller so him wearing a yellow raincoat and with the red balloon and stuff it was so funny. and i was the creepy fucking clown but he was still funnier because imagine a tall blonde georgie like DAMN. )

reviewing q’s -

marlene would treat you right. I just know she would.

marry him for the money!!! marrying evan is a good choice too though (killing barty for the win!!!)

clothes and books and candles and jewellery YESSS GIRL AS YOU SHOULD JAZZ YOURSELF UP.

liv better step up and get that tattoo. you guys are the bunnyfish it’s practically illegal not to get that tattoo.

no same honestly i’m a second away from my death i could be rolling on the ground and die in a few second fr you’re so valid for this.

picking truth forever yessss >>>> (i’ve picked dare but i’m playing with lu so it’s always stuff like ‘i dare u to eat a spoonful of ketchup’ like damb boy you can do better.)

i buy nail polish and lipstick from poundland and primark all the time. literally it’s an addiction because i think buying them for a pound is a good deal . but then i buy like 20 of them and suddenly i’m a hoarder. (special mention to my buys of the royal butter and the toblerone!)

THIS QUOTE. OH MY GOD THIS QUOTE THIS QUOTE . killing me opening me helaing me and killing me. someone loving u like this is all u fucking need fr >>>

james potter has an ego the size of a lake but a heart to match. mskingbean knew what she was doing fr . I LIVE FOR LITTLE WOMEN REFERENCES IN FICS OMG I’M ACTUALLY WRITING ONE AS WE SPEAK.

i’ve never met a celebrity so that’s annoying. wlaking past seth rogen??? so casually??? i’d be screaming and stuff. seeing john mulaney and olivia munn must be jarring actually. i’m jarred rn. like wdym they sit around eating lunch like me??

this sounds so funny ‘humpty dumpty party mix’ dying dead. but also i want to eat it sounds really fucking good and such a range of cuisine in there seriously.

no this is so real of u. I don’t crush on anyone except for fictional characters who real humans will never ever live up to.

ahhhhhhhhh liv knowing you bestttt that’s peak platonic soulmatism!!!! (your dad sounds so cool 2 fr) i get that sm because lu knows me best and that’s honestly peak knowing someone that well .

lover’s my first dance song, but it depends on what mood i’m in. sometimes i need to feel like a criminal, and at that point it’s getaway car. but rn it’s lover. in a very lover mood atm.

AHHHHH OH MY GOD THAT’S SO COOL AHHHHHHHHH SEEING THE PARTHENON??? I wanna see it too DAMN.

coming out while driving yesssss because they have to keep driving. (And to Harry styles??? double cool??) for me it was lu that figured it out . he was like damn you a bisexual. (obviously more deep but this is very much the gist of it) LONG DRIVES WITH MUSIC AND WINE AND SUNSET OH MY GODDDDDDD . DREAM.

u chose the right answer. like idc as a brit , which is where regulus is from , i say r(edge) so it’s redge. DONE. (although if anyone else says it it doesn’t matter ALL that much. )

listen i watched friends and i think ‘va fa a napoli’ is a swear ??? confirmation pls ??? I TRIED TO LEARN SWEDISH FOR THIS EXACT REASON OMG. because i was obsessed with young royals but i only did one lesson. my brain said no! i did 6 years of french , have a french fluent best friend and still can’t speak it properly. such a pain honestly. (that’s such a cute lil nerdy thing to do tho damn girl u get that excited???? go learn your star wars language YES DO IT!!!) (AHHH U CAN READ ANCIENT GREEK ??? MA’AM THAT’S SO COOL.)

q’s for me —->

fuck evan marry reg kill barty. i am a gold digger. that’s all. and barty because he did stuff to alive and frank and if it comes to choosing i shall bring that up unfortunately .

marry lily fuck marlene kill pandora (sorry pandora sorry u don’t deserve it) lily evans is WIFEY. she is wife she is mother i am hers and she is mine. love her.

My time to shine as a polyglot.

portuguese

gujrati

hindi

urdu

marathi

bsl

i am fluent in all of the above but i also speak punjabi a lil and also know braille english , but apparently that’s not a language so i can’t use it.

4. topaz cool as shit. so topaz , but also obsidian and amethyst (birthstone alert!!)

5. i have not ! however I saw a quote of it on my dash (‘you were my purpose’) so now i will watch it !! very excited for it !!!

6. forest. could be lovely there with picnics and shit. i’ve had a forest picnic and i’ve been fine so forest. not sea because i won’t betray reg , and not mountains because i cannot climb !!!

7. weirdly enough a hairdresser 💀💀💀 wtf was up in my head??? i used to think the cutting and dyeing hair was so cool and i really wanted to do it until i was like 9. then i got some sense knocked into me.

8. cancer 💀💀i did my epq (which is like a dissertation of sorts) on this and i still remember everything and honestly it’s so sad and so much but i could talk about it for ages. BUT ON A HAPPIER NOTE !!! I COULD TALK ABOUT PLATONIC SOULMATISM FOR HOURS !!!!!! HOW A FRIEND LIEK THAT IS SO SO IMPORTANT THAN HAVING A BILLION FRIENDS WHO WON’T EVEN KNOWN YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR !!!!

9. timothée chalamet & louis partridge ( i love timmy for obvious reasons & i could so treat louis better than his grandma ass girlfriend come here bb) ALSO FLORENCE AND ZENDAYA (but I don’t want tom to bite my thumb off for simping after his gf)

10.APPLE MUSIC !!!!! APPLE MUSIC FOREVER AND EVER ARE YOU KIDDING ???? dolby atmos just does somrthing to my ears.

11.canis major !!! very sirius of me but canis major !!! love it and i can tell which star is sirius right away. but draco is a close second !!!

12.well u know about the dancing jazz . so i’ll pick another one (hard to choose damn) i took him with me to a wedding as my date (fake of course because of the family asking do u have a bf yet do u have a bf yet) and he was the white boy there and he was wearing a tux and he was so innocent and everything he ate was so spicy he nearly cried but he powered through and when he came out on the dance floor he DID THE DANCE BETTER THAN ME???? how dare he??????? and he was so nice to all my family who kept calling him ‘gora’ (white boy) even though he fully knew what that meant . like he did all that and he bought a toaster to gift to them as well. it was something else and i will always remember that. BUT ALSO I HAVE ANOTHER WEDDING COMING UP SOON (start of march) AND I’M TAKING HIM AS MY FAKE DATE AGAIN !!!! hoping he’s built his spice tolerance up , but i shall update u soon on whether he has or not.

13. i really fucking want wingstop. like so badly. I would fly to the us for that shit i just WANT ONE CHOMP ON THAT STUFF. it looks so fucking good and life changing like damn come in my mouth bb. And also birria tacos. i need to try that asap it looks so good i could cry.

q’s for u -

something u could talk about for hours?

worst advice you’ve ever given?

worst advice you’ve ever taken?

if u were a periodic table element which one would u be ?

what’s your undercover spy name ?

do you prefer savoury or sweet?

Who’s your favourite friend (from the tv show)?

3 wishes ??

how long are u surviving in a zombie apocalypse?

favourite stone ?

fave constellation ?

weirdest dream ?

worst dream?

best dream ?

timothée chalamet or ben barnes ?

things u eat at the movies ?

last text you sent?

last text you got ?

phone calls or text messages ?

what greek tragedy hero are u ? (this is a quiz & i got orpheus !)

And what’s your favourite meme ? I must know this?

(beeeeee beeee thank u for being such a lovely human !!! come back soon !!! i will miss u and i’m seeing this before the exam , so i’m chanelling all my remus Lupin energy into this. thank u for the luck , i wish u luck in life <3333 come back soon dont be too long !!! )

#ess waters a plant #bee <33 #ess’s marauders x ts crossover

0 notes

ya-girl-mc · 4 years

Text

Sweet Indulgence

Character: Kuroo Tetsurou × Fem Reader

Concept: Y/N and Kuroo spend their Valentine's evening with a homecooked date night dinner; then came "dessert" 😏

⚠️ Warning: Sexual content (also contains a minor spoiler from the Haikyuu!! manga since I referred to a lil detail there for Kuroo's character in this fic)

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day ya'll esp to those who'll be spending it alone (me lol 😔✊). This fic was requested by a dear irl friend of mine who's one of the biggest Kuroo trash I know so here ya go 😉

☆☆ A Haikyuu!! Fanfiction ☆☆

"Damn it."

Kuroo's disgruntled voice caused Y/N to look up from her morning coffee as she gazed at him inquisitively. "What's up?"

A deep frown etched on his face, he sighed and set his phone down on the table, his attention once again on his half-eaten breakfast. "The Chief. He needs me to work overtime tonight, of all times. I swear that old man is giving me way too much load for how much I'm getting paid-"

Y/N brought up her coffee mug to her lips, gazing at her boyfriend sympathetically as she listened to him rant about his rather unfortunate office life. While Kuroo loves and is adept at his new job at the Sports Promotion Division of the Japan Volleyball Association, his overbearing boss made matters far from pleasing.

Ah yes, the toil of the working class.

"-and we even made those dinner reservations tonight for Valentine's Day."

Oh, right. Like any typical run-of-the-mill working class couple, Y/N and Kuroo were looking forward to a classy dinner to celebrate the 14th, yet the unforeseen circumstances seemed to have derailed their evening plans. Huffing in annoyance, he set his utensils down and shot her a guilty look. She was quite disappointed of course, but it couldn't be helped; it's all part of the game, as they say. "It's fine, we could always go at a different time. You do what you gotta do."

"You know, when you act all level-headed like that, I can't help but feel even worse," Kuroo sighed, thoroughly frustrated at how his boss managed to ruin their dinner plans.

She grinned at him as an idea occurred to her. "What time do you get off work today?"

"Probably 8 or 9, at the latest. Why?"

"Great!" Y/N chimed, chuckling sheepishly as soon as she noticed the impassive expression on Kuroo's face. "Well...not because you have to work overtime since that definitely sucks. I mean, I'd have enough time to prepare us a fancy dinner for date night." Her eyes lit up in excitement, her mind already racing with ideas as she began to ponder on what dishes to prepare.

Kuroo grinned at her in amusement, feeling himself gradually get over his workplace woes. Glancing at his phone, he briskly cleaned up after himself and proceeded to grab his belongings. "Thanks for the meal, but I'd better go on ahead. The earlier I can get there, the sooner I can get everything done."

Y/N followed suit and ushered him to the entrance of their shared apartment. It was pretty rare to see Kuroo invigorated on a weekday morning as he usually lazed around with her for a bit before they both headed off to their respective offices; the idea of a scrumptious date night dinner prepared by his lover definitely served as extra motivation to get through the day.

After adjusting his tie, she proceeded to ruffle his hair to try and straighten his stubborn bed head, but to no avail. "I don't know how you can seem to pull off going to work with bed hair, but anyway, do your best today, Kuroo-san!" She teased and saw him off with a salute.

Damn it, how adorable.

In one swift motion, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, his lips pecking hers ever so slightly as he pulled away, chuckling at the dazed expression on her face. "I'll make it up to you later, I promise. Then, I'll be off." He waved at her as Y/N watched his retreating figure, her heart still pounding from their prior interaction.

As I thought, cohabitation really is the best.

*****

It was just about past 7 in the evening when Y/N arrived at their apartment with an armful of groceries. Despite getting off from work as early as 5:30, she lost track of time in the supermarket, completely engulfed with the multitude of ideas that raced through her mind. Cooking was a passion of hers, and there's nothing she enjoys more other than spoiling her significant other with her culinary prowess.

Unloading the bags on the kitchen's countertop, Y/N's eyes scanned over the ingredients, thoroughly pleased with her purchase.

Seared rib eye steak paired with a classic red wine jus, a creamy and delectable potato au gratin as a side dish, and a decadent chocolate mousse dessert for that extra indulgence...ahhh it's perfect! I'll make sure that every penny spent on these ridiculously expensive ingredients will be worth it!

Y/N threw an apron on and proceeded to undertake the necessary preparations for each of the dishes, determined to salvage what's left of her and Kuroo's Valentine's Day plans with probably the best dinner she'll be preparing by far. She recounted on the recipes she had sneakily studied in-between working hours, finding herself completely engrossed with the tasks at hand.

Okay, the gratin's baking in the oven...once there's 30 minutes left to its cooking time that's when I'll start preparing the red wine jus. Then I'll be searing the steak, let it rest, then prepare the mousse in the process. Yep, I got this in the bag!

Once more immersing herself in her culinary escapades, Y/N was finally down to the last task of whipping up the chocolate mousse when the front door opened, signaling Kuroo's arrival from work as the wonderful aromas that wafted from the kitchen uplifted him from his weariness. With her back turned towards him, he shut the door and sauntered towards the kitchen, a scheming grin on his face as he crept towards his oblivious girlfriend.

"Y/N," he breathed teasingly into her ear, causing her to yelp in surprise.

"Goddammit, Tetsurou!" She hastily switched off the hand mixer to avoid splattering chocolate mousse everywhere, shooting him a dirty look in the process. "You're lucky I only had a mixer in my hand! What if it was something else, like a-"

The sight of her handsome lover, still clad in his office attire with a bouquet of flowers in his hand, rendered her speechless. He chuckled as Y/N continued to gawk at him, stepping closer to wrap his free arm around her shoulders. "Happy Valentine's Day." Kuroo tenderly pressed his lips on her temples as he handed her the bouquet.

Ahh, great. Now I feel like crap for yelling at him like that. Unable to suppress the smile that made its way to her face, she sheepishly accepted his gift, standing on her toes to plant an appreciative kiss on his cheek. "T-thank you...and Happy Valentine's Day, too."

The warmth that adorned her cheeks just made her even more irresistible, yet Kuroo tried to reel in his urges as he allotted a reasonable distance between them. "So, what did my cute lover prepare for date night?"

As if on cue at his inquiry, her eyes immediately lit up. "Well, I started off by preparing the potato au gratin since that takes the longest to cook. I infused the cream with a little thyme, rosemary, and a dash of lemon zest to cut back on the heaviness. Then, for the rib eye steak, I-" Kuroo simply listened on as she rambled, the corners of his mouth turning upwards as she explained the entirety of the cooking process of each of the dishes she had prepared. While he didn't understand a majority of it, it was utterly endearing for him to see her so engrossed in the fervor of her culinary passion.

So basically, she prepared a fancy potato dish, a steak dish, and chocolate mousse for dessert. Damn it, she's just too adorable when she goes all out.

"-so anyway," Y/N continued, grasping Kuroo's attention once more. "Can you check if the mousse tastes fine? I'm a bit concerned that I may have fallen short on the sweetness." With a spoon in hand, she scooped a generous amount and held it out for him to taste.

Taking it into his mouth, Kuroo's eyes widened as the dessert's decadence flooded his taste buds. The mousse was not overbearingly sweet due to the dark chocolate she used, yet it still delivered the right amount of indulgence for a dessert; the perfect balance of flavor was definitely to his liking. "Wow, that's delicious!" He exclaimed and was tempted to beg for another spoonful.

Y/N grinned, her pride swelling up at his positive feedback. "Yay, glad to hear! I'll be popping this in the fridge to chill while we have dinner."

Setting down the bouquet of flowers on the countertop, she proceeded to take the bowl; however, Kuroo had something else in mind as he held her arm and leaned closer, peering at her inquisitive expression. "Why don't you give it a taste as well?"

"Uhm...okay." As she reached for another spoon, Kuroo snatched it away from her and shook his head dismissively. Scooping a spoonful of the mixture, he applied a dollop of mousse on his fingers and held it out, a mischievous smirk on his face.

"Here."

The atmosphere between them suddenly shifted, and with Kuroo eyeing her so earnestly, she couldn't help her cheeks from flaming up at his promiscuous gesture. Amid Y/N's brief contemplation, he brushed his fingers across her lips and gently pushed them into her mouth.

Her heart thumping at how unbelievably alluring Kuroo was at their proximity, she locked her eyes with his, her tongue slowly lapping up the remnants of chocolate mousse. It was long gone, yet she continued to suck fervently on his fingers, earning a shudder from him. She slowly took it out of her mouth, keeping her gaze trained on his. "You're right, it is delicious."

Kuroo's eyes darkened with lust as he took a step closer, running his thumb across her lip to collect all remaining traces of the mousse. His tongue slowly darted out of his mouth and licked his thumb clean, grinning as Y/N simply stared at him, her mouth slightly agape. "I know that you just prepared us a delicious dinner, but there's something else I'd rather eat right now."

Unable to hold himself back any longer, Kuroo slipped his hand behind her head, pulling her close as his lips urgently met hers. The force nearly made Y/N stumble, but his arm immediately went around her waist, stabilizing her position as she met his kiss with fervor. As their tongues intertwined, both of them could detect a hint of sweetness from the remnants of the chocolate mousse which only intensified their thirst for the other.

Y/N struggled to breathe as Kuroo's tongue relentlessly explored her mouth, the hands that held his blazer beginning to tremble. He took her bottom lip into his teeth, the sharp sensation causing her knees to buckle as he backed her up into the countertop, pressing himself even closer to her. Her head was beginning to spin, and if it weren't for Kuroo's lean stature holding her in place, she would have collapsed then and there.

"T-tetsurou," Y/N gasped out as Kuroo trailed his lips across her jaw and down to her neck, wincing as she felt his teeth graze the skin. His hands wandered down to her waist as he hoisted her up on the countertop, his tongue darting out to soothe the love bites he left along her neck. Pulling away momentarily, he eyed her with raw passion and need as he loosened up his neck tie, the seemingly mundane gesture igniting Y/N's desire.

"Strip for me." His voice was low, commanding, yet she could sense the desperation it conveyed. Her heart pounding wildly, Y/N proceeded to remove her apron and unbutton her blouse, her face burning at how Kuroo's eyes scrutinized her every move; however, her current position hindered her as she struggled to discard her skirt. Leaning back on her forearm, she slightly lifted her hips and slipped off her skirt with her free hand, causing Kuroo to grit his teeth at how unbelievably erotic the entire scene was.

Now down to her underwear, Y/N attempted to pull him towards her yet he shook his head defiantly, his finger trailing from her lips down to the swell of her breasts. "I meant all of it."

"You should've clarified it earlier," she huffed, completely flustered at how Kuroo enjoyed making her squirm.

He then responded to her quip with his own. "I didn't think that needed to be clarified, Y/N."

Completely at a loss on how to respond, she sighed in defeat and conceded as her hands moved to discard the last few pieces of clothing, eventually swallowing hard as she noticed how aroused Kuroo had gotten through his slacks. He wanted to take her then and there, but as his eyes wandered to the bowl of chocolate mousse atop the counter, he decided to have a little bit more fun; it was Valentine's Day after all.

Y/N followed his gaze and immediately caught on on what he was planning to do, sighing internally as the dessert she painstakingly made will be used for a completely different purpose. Yet, she fidgeted in anticipation, unable to deny how much the prospect turned her on. Kuroo chuckled, the gestures she displayed serving as all the confirmation he needed to proceed.

Reaching for the bowl and a ladle, Kuroo scooped a generous amount of mousse and poured it on her body, his own breathing picking up as he watched the slightly viscous mixture cascade down her bare chest. "That kind of tickles," Y/N remarked shyly, keeping her eyes trained downwards as she couldn't bring herself to look at him.

As I thought...this is kind of embarrassing after all.

Kuroo sensed her apprehension. He leaned towards her and pressed a reassuring kiss on her cheek, a gentle smile adorning his face. "I'll be cleaning this off of you in no time."

Before Y/N could process the implications of his words, she flinched in surprise as Kuroo's tongue boldly lapped up the mousse on her chest, her hands immediately moving towards his hair as she trembled in pleasure. His hands on her thighs, he abruptly pulled her closer towards him, her legs wrapping around his waist in the process. The sweetness of the mousse and the lustful moans Y/N released overwhelmed his senses as he ran his tongue over her nipple, her hands tightening its grip on his hair in response. It was starting to hurt a bit as she pulled at the strands, completely lost in her own passion as he stimulated her, yet Kuroo didn't mind; rather, it only encouraged him further as he began to take her nipples into his teeth, causing her to cry out at the sensations he induced.

"T-tetsurou...enough, please," she begged in-between gasps as she lifted Kuroo's head from her chest, her eyes dazed and completely overcome with desire.

"All right, all right. I'll stop," he rescinded, pulling away from Y/N slightly as he grinned at the panicked expression on her face.

"N-no, that's not what I-"

"You want me to touch you elsewhere, right?" Kuroo once more reached for the ladle and poured a generous amount of mousse along her thighs. In an instant, he was down on his knees as he positioned her legs atop his shoulders, the new angle allowing him an enticing view of her soaked core. Glancing up momentarily at her, he shuddered in pleasure as he noticed the lustful way she was looking at him.

Licking his fingers clean, he kissed hungrily down her thigh, his tongue darting out to lap up the sweet mixture. Y/N moaned uncontrollably, twining her fingers with the strands of his hair in an attempt to keep him in place. Kuroo's mouth eventually reached her inner thigh, the warm breaths he let out teasing her entrance. He looked up once more to seek out her permission as the single nod she managed was all the confirmation he needed.

His lips and tongue began to stimulate her most sensitive parts, Y/N's grip on his hair tightening as she gasped out in pleasure. She was intoxicating, the high-pitched noises and gestures she made guiding him in his ministrations. As soon as his lips touched her sweet spot, she jerked in surprise, causing Kuroo to cease his actions. "What's wrong? Did that feel good for you?"

Y/N nodded earnestly as she looked down at him; the sight of Kuroo on his knees with his head in-between her legs was just too much to take. Taking her silence as a signal to continue, he resumed his earlier actions, her every response, no matter how miniscule, fueling his own arousal. He decided to take it even further as the deliberate moans he let out caused Y/N to whimper at how pleasurable the vibrations felt.

"T-tetsurou...!" She gasped, her insides tightening which signaled her fast-approaching release. Kuroo made no attempt to stop as the movement of his lips and tongue intensified, pushing her on the verge of coming. Her entire body began to tremble and it wasn't long before she finally climaxed, her upper body slumping forward as she struggled to regain her breathing.

Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Kuroo swiftly stood and allowed Y/N to lean into his embrace, his hands stroking her hair as her breathing eventually evened. "You okay?"

"Y-yeah, thanks for that," she mumbled in embarrassment, her head pressed against his chest as she listened to his heartbeat, her eyelids gradually becoming heavier.

However, Kuroo was far from being done. He tipped up her chin, all traces of his earlier composure long gone from his face. "Sorry Y/N. We're not done yet. Not when you got me all worked up from that." He drew back and gently pulled her arm, his hands moving to provide support as she hopped down from the counter, her legs slightly wobbling. Her entire body still felt quite sensitive from the remnants of her earlier passion, yet she was eager for more.

His hands moved frantically as he turned Y/N around and pushed her down, her front pressing against the cool surface of the granite countertop. She heard Kuroo curse under his breath as he took in her new position, her face burning at how much more exposed she felt; yet, she couldn't deny the anticipation she felt for what's to come. "Hurry..."

"Shit, hold on...let me just-" Kuroo was frantic now, completely engulfed in his own desire as he reached for his pocket for a condom; he always kept one in hand for "emergency purposes", as he claimed. Holding the packet momentarily between his teeth, his fingers fumbled as he unbuckled and unbuttoned his slacks. Ripping the wrapper off with his teeth, he proceeded to put the condom on, positioning himself behind Y/N. He wrapped his arm around her waist to pull her close as his other hand held his throbbing length. "I'm going in."

He plunged himself deep, both of them moaning uncontrollably at the sensation of their joined bodies. Her insides were unbearably warm and tight, yet she still managed to take in the entirety of his shaft so easily. Snapping his hips forward, Kuroo let out a throaty groan as their position allowed him to reach even deeper parts inside of her. Completely overcome with his overwhelming need, he began thrusting wildly, his grip on her waist tightening.

Y/N grasped the edges of the countertop at the sheer force of his thrusts, her entire being staggering at how relentlessly Kuroo made love to her; but, she was not one to complain as she eventually moved her hips along with his, taking him even deeper than before.

"Shit...Y/N, you feel so good," Kuroo moaned, his teeth nibbling along her earlobe. It was during times like these when she and him indulged in each other that Kuroo strays from his usual composed and laid-back demeanor; she took pride in being able to witness and experience this completely different side of him.

Their lustful moans echoed throughout the apartment, yet despite her current state-of-mind, Y/N managed to recollect herself, well-aware of their neighbors risking on hearing them. She brought up her hand to her mouth to silence herself; however, Kuroo withheld her attempt to do so, too far gone to care about such matters.

"It's too late for that now. Don't hold yourself back, let me hear you." The unbearably seductive manner he had whispered those words fueled Y/N's desire ten-fold, and it wasn't long before she felt her incoming release as her insides tightened, eliciting a throaty groan from Kuroo.

"I-I'm close...Tetsurou...!" She began calling for him even louder then before. Gritting his teeth, Kuroo wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her to a standing position, the new angle allowing him to plunge himself even deeper. His release was fast-approaching as well, his mouth falling atop her shoulder to stifle the lewd noises he was making. Y/N reached up and grasped his hair to keep him in place, her hips moving urgently against his as he showered her neck and shoulders with kisses.

It was just too much to bear, the lustful noises she made intensifying at the sensations he invoked. Moaning out her name, Kuroo lifted her leg and increased his pace, the pleasure of their love-making pushing them on the verge of insanity as they eventually climaxed, Y/N's entire body slumping against his body. Their chests heaving, Kuroo brushed his lips against her cheek, carefully pulling out of her as he collected her languid form into his arms, both of them gradually coming down from their high.

"I love you," he murmured tenderly, his lips brushing against the top of her head.

"I love you, too." Y/N's hands grasped his blazer, glancing upwards to return his smile with her own, both of them in a state of euphoria. It was short-lived, however, as she immediately recollected herself, her panicked eyes darting around the kitchen. "Oh my god, the gratin! And the steak, it's probably oxidized by now...and the chocolate mousse! Only you got to eat it, Tetsurou, you idiot!"

Kuroo couldn't hold back his laughter as she scrambled around the kitchen to collect her discarded clothes, abruptly switching the oven off before moving to check on the remaining dishes of their long-forgotten date night dinner. However, he stopped her in her tracks as he gathered her once more into his embrace. "Before that, I think we should clean up the counter - and more importantly - ourselves first. Besides, even if you feed me burnt crap, I'd still be happy to eat anything you make."

He'd expect her to swoon over his words, yet she only shot him a narrowed look, her hands pushing against his chest. "Butter me up all you want, you're not escaping dish duty tonight."

Kuroo chuckled and watched in amusement as Y/N marched to their bathroom to take a shower, his hands reaching for a rag and disinfectant. He proceeded to wipe the countertop clean, the grin on his face widening as he did. "It was still worth a shot."

#haikyuu #haikyuu fanfiction #kuroo tetsurou #smut #kuroo x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu kuroo #request

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preciouslandmermaid · 2 years

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playlist anon here! Cornelia street ALMOST made it on the playlist, it just didn’t because I wanted more angst!!! I hope you enjoy it and i wanna know your thoughts if you’re willing to share when you finish your listen☺️

I'm actually gonna put all my thoughts on this reply, lmao. And I'm typing these up as I listen so uhh this might be a rambled mess LMAO.

Track 1: IMPECCABLE CHOICE. we really cannot have a playlist without the star of the show ;) ~ i love cigarettes after sex lol they're so moody and sensual. show stopping. incredible. iconic. Track 2: TAYLOR!!! SWIFT!!! God, I love gold rush so much. esp the line; "I don't like anticipating my face in a red flush" because i think it perfectly encapsulates how the reader feels about carmy. her desire for distance, her uneasiness about her affection/fondness, the vulnerability that he unknowingly teases from her. Track 3: I've never heard this song before. I know of HAIM. But, wow this song really gave me like BUTTERFLIES. Especially these two lines: "We're watching the sunrise from the kitchen counter // When you're lyin' between my legs it doesn't matter." like 👀👀👀 HELLO?

Track 4: Yeah, this one - like - taylor swift is so good at writing songs about yearning LMAO. Just. * Chef kiss.* Track 5: MITSKI. MITSKI. MITSKI!!!! Is it really a playlist if we don't have mitski? answer: no it is not! ugh. "baby will u kiss me arleady?" LIKE DAMN, TRUE. MISTKI!!! WILL HE?? Track 6: Okay, I need my girl by the national. is. the most yearning-of-songs to ever yearn. this song really captures what it feels to be like "outside" - not relating to peers, or family, and feeling like you have this connection to a specific person who even when you feel small/insecure/weak/etc---this person is who can pull you out of it, who softens the edges of the world, :.) i love them sfm. Track 7: hi taylor. This song is so carmy-coded. "And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound" and this one too: "And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad" -- carmy knows EXACTLY what to say to cut someone deep. ha ha. this line, especially, feels very carmy/mikey to me: "I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that" COOL, COOL, NOW IM FUCKING CRYING.

Track 8: emotional damage. emotional damage. how dare u put phoebe bridgers on this playlist. i weep. this song perfectly captures the grief that they (reader and carmy) share. 😭

Track 9: I've never heard this song but it got me with the FIRST LINE. "in the car in the backseat" HELLO?? fucking IMMACULATE. also, like yes reader IS a fucking mess. they're both messy. and yet "I believe that you see me for who I am" [SCREAMING INTO MY PILLOW AND WALKS INTO THE OCEAN]

Track 10: wow this song is also so THEM. "All the skeletons you hide. Show me yours, and I'll show you mine." hi, i will need 7-10 business days to process this, thnx. goodbye. u really weren't lying when you said you wanted angst. u know that meme of the stick-figure guy lying on the ground in a puddle of his own tears? That's me.

Track 11: Hoax by Tswift is so Carmy-coded. I think Taylor wrote all these songs for him, actually. but, also the references to shades of blue, make me think of reader looking to Carmy's eyes. both romantic and lowkey fucking SAD. are u trying to fucking kill me??

Track 12: it's about the yearning. i just love the concept that this song implies that like no matter how much you try to push someone out, they can still get under ur skin. HAHA WALKING INTO THE OCEAN AGAIN.

Track 13: i made the mistake of looking up the lyrics to this song so i could include my favorite line and then the internet told me that the meaning of this song could be interpreted as "pouring love into someone and they only give a fraction back in return." wow that hurts bestie. but also the ending of this song, the way it picks up, and the crescendo of music (im not a musician) its giving ~crying while sliding down the wall in the golden light of pre-sunset and clutching ur phone to ur chest.~

Track 14: wow this song fucking slaps? Also screaming at the chrous: "Is it insensitive for me to say - Get your shit together? - So I can love you" LOSING IT. I feel like it could be taken both ways, Reader's view to Carmy and his view to her. Like. Hmmm. besties. I'm feeling like these two might be grenades thrown at each other. hahahah.

Track 15: WE GOT HOZIER?? damn!! I feel like you went into the cosmos and found all the bangers I had forgotten about or simply never heard. God, I love his folky, gentle vibe. I feel like this would be the perfect song to have played during the wedding scene when they're both sitting in front of Lake Michigan, talking about loss, and their budding friendship.

Track 16: "The devil's in the details but you've got a friend in me." Again, are you TRYING to kill me?? Honestly, all of these songs could apply to SOME part, some scene of this fic, and I want to THROW MYSELF INTO THE SUN!! also like the line....."Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other". that's it. I'm listening to the rest of these from beyond the grave. also like ugh the way this song embodies being THERE for someone but not being able to u know fix the shit they're going thru or heal it and just having to accept that.

Track 17: daddy hozier is back! this song is just ugh so romantic. i feel like hozier is the only Man to Ever Exsist, imo, and get it. He gets it! Also, this song makes me feel like being "brought to life" by love and uguuugghh. I know ur going for an angst angle but this song makes me feel so warm and cozy x)

Track 18: WOW THIS SONG IS SOOO READER. This is her song. You've done it. You've cracked the code. I think this song could be interpreted as her feelings for Carmy, but also, on a larger scale--The Bakery--when it came into her life, everything changed, and she now has something to prove, something to work for. I'm in AWE of ur mind, anon.

Track 19: oh ok we're back to being sad, I GUESS. GOSH. EVERMORE?? Pls!!!! The way this song describes a story of grief and how it feels like it's going to last forever, but it doesn't. Time actually does heal wounds. You just have to make it through the months, through the cold, and into safety and warmth. What a PERFECT ending song choice.

how i feel about this playlist (affectionate)

#fic: nghb feedback #long post #this is so incoherent im sorry lsdjfdslkfjsdl (not sorry)#i have the biggest grin on my face LMAO

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punkscowardschampions · 6 years

Text

Tommy & Ali

Chatting ‘bout Christmas, boy troubles, pregnancy AND THE FACT THE BABY IS TOTALLY NOT DREW’S LOLLOLLOL

Tommy: Oi! 😼 What you gettin da cos like even I feel cheeky considering socks for 2 years running Ali joined the chat 3 hours ago Tommy: I was gonna go full rivers of whiskey cept I'd probs drown myself in it before the bottle was in the bag 😂 Ali: So you should, elf on the shelf! Socks should only ever be an add-on prezzie, even if they're DEAD comical, like. Ali: Speaking of elf on the shelf, would you be willing to come round mine every day at the crack of dawn (aka JUST before the kiddos will arise like horrible demon krakkens from the depths) so I can arrange you in comical positions and situations? Ali: They love that shit. I on the other hand want to murder the CEO of whatever company/the high-key mum mafia that made this shit popular again. Ali: I've got me thinking cap on for the old man for ye...Hmm Ali: (and how rude to get cuffed for the season and not even get to the part where you get a bomb-ass present/someone to tout around the family functions...rude. You not actually at the bottom of a bottle quite yet though, yeah? Doing the obligatory welfare checkup here) Tommy: Excuse you miss money bags! 💰 just 'cause you're one of the rare artists who ain't starving like! some of us don't have boyfriends who cook or paying audiences Tommy: so yeah obvs! Gotta keep in shape just in case don't I? catch me pirouetting across your patio bitch Tommy: Green's my colour these days and red's always been signature Tommy: I'm alright (love you for asking!) how's you? Tommy: Genuinely Ali: Oh yeah, 'cos father will flip his shit if the price tag ain't AT LEAST three figs... 😏 Silly billy, and oi, oi! My student loan ain't kicked in yet ...I'm on a gap yaaaaaah though, darling, I've simply GOTTA act like a frivilous rich bitch. Deal with it, you're still the shady bitch of the fam, okay? 😘 Ali: Yaaasss, you're gonna have to drop a couple of pounds to fit in that teeny costume but a day in the life of a TRUE star init, babe? I believe in you Ali: Bet you didn't come here to be called fat, did you? How fucking cheeky is that forreal Ali: Colour of luck boy 🍀🍀🍀 Ali: Hmm, ngl I'm in a bit of a...situation, and I ain't talking I've forgot to order a turkey Tommy: Imagine...jog on old man just 'cause went for the quantity with the sprogs doesn't mean you'll get quality back soz Tommy: try it but good luck trying to get your little uns to deal with you being the spoilt one 😂 Tommy: well since I got the 🍀 its 🤞 Tommy: feckin hell has caleb forgotten kids are for life not just chrimbo again? Tommy: I'll deck his halls if he's being a prick Ali: That'll show him! That's what you get for bringing me into this world, whole lotta backchat and not an ounce of grattitude, take that! Ali: Join me 'cos I'm sure that's what mum feels I've got her Ali: We did Rio's first Xmas morning, and 2nd, at home! It really is Caleb's fams turn Ali: I can't help that its Junie's first, evidently I ain't planning this shit woman! Ali: #contraceptionwhomst? #pulloutnhopeforthebest #itswhatgodwouldwant Ali: And it ain't like we're not coming over for a second dinner, we fat as hell, get wid it and pass the gravy Ali: Catch me in the tesco throwing tantrums with Rio on the reg tbh #twocanplayatthatgamehoney #childrenraisingchildren Ali: Nah, although loving all the macho threats of violence when my honour is at stake as of late...Is my drama letting you live up to your full brotherly potential? Welcome... Ali: TMI, give a shit, but I'm late on and I've thrown up a few times, not from the mother's ruin, like Ali: hahahahahama'sgonnakillmeisn'tshe Ali: whatthefucklike Tommy: Who you kidding you're the blatant fave & lbr if the lord's got his specs on should be even more so for following her shining example like Tommy: honor thy father and mother and all that Tommy: who doesn't love a mini me Tommy: especially one who can sing every sperm is sacred with perf pitch Tommy: Amen! this aint 1850 pass the roasties gdi! Tommy: all we want for christmas is carbs Tommy: OH MY CHRIST NOT AGAIN Tommy: 😧 Tommy: I know you're on your gap year but no need to be so literal Ali: Ha, please! Not Tess Vickers' fave. Da's, obviously, as he is mine, (babe). You and Joe are the momma's boys, always have been, you needy little babbas. Ali: A woman who doesn't love herself...damn, too deep, reverse, reverse! Ali: You'd be surprised how annoying an all-singing-all-dancing constant reminder of all your best and worst bits is Ali: Usually the best, which is happy-making magic, but when its the worst...GOOD LORDT. Plus its a reminder of the same in your other half, and we all like to overlook that shit now, don't we? *sips tea* Ali: God I am gonna go HAM with my 'cravings' this Chrimbo...what timing! Maybe I did plan this after-all Ali: but no, I did not Ali: But yeah...this is a thing I'm processing, thought I'd drag you down with me 🤷 Tommy: I was gonna be all like not with him probs dead in a ditch and me one audition away from getting cosy in a cardboard box but I better swerve too dont wanna spend the season with the samaritans on speed dial Tommy: you and fraze are the success stories savor it Tommy: honey I've got a mirror Tommy: and near constant feedback from them in the know Tommy: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tommy: that's calebs chrimbo gift sorted then yeah? Ali: Lordy, I know we're Irish but there's no need to be that fuckin' maudlin, Tommo Ali: Oh, you wanted an idea for Da but that is SO Fraze's prezzie Ali: Just tell him that, all day. Money can't buy that kinda happiness Ali: The spirit of the Holidays Ali: Them in the know don't know shit Ali: I mean...gift or curse? Ali: We've only just got back on track, this is probably going to derail the whole damn caboose Tommy: everyone's a critic and there's only one shane macgowan I hear ya Tommy: I reckoned you meant a mirror for a sec I was like uh huh he's got that one covered love 😏 Tommy: Hey! That's mine covered 🙋 just repeat that back to me Tommy: those clueless cunts Tommy: Nah he'll be buzzing esp if he gets another girl Tommy: there's only one Rio but he's shameless ha Tommy: leave the cursing for ma she'll be doing plenty once she's done stuffing your stocking with contraceptives Ali: Mhmm, save it for the improptu karaoke when we're all feeling merry on the day, like Ali: Lmao, he'd live in a 360 degree view changing room if he could Ali: How millenial of us! Lets just gift each other with positive affirmations Ali: Maybe...Gah Ali: Whatever, whether he deals or doesn't, doesn't change the fact I am with child again and yeah, Caleb's reaction is the least of my worries Ali: I'm going to be going to Uni abroad with 3 kids...damn Ali: If I don't get locked away for my own good, of course Tommy: 😇 Will do Tommy: I reckon that's the goal when he 'makes it' Tommy: scrawl it on my personalised starbies cup and have done babe Tommy: You're grand it'll just be one hell of a plane ride Tommy: 🍀 & 🤞 Tommy: OH SHIT WAIT Tommy: the whole Caleb reaction thing has me thinking...not to be rude but Tommy: it is his yeah? Ali: It better be Ali: Aside from the Drew incident I didn't shag anyone else Ali: and we used a condom Ali: I mighta been several sheets to the wind but I hadn't lost my whole goddamn mind Tommy: thank christ for that Tommy: imagine trying to play happy families with that twat Ali: Amen Ali: Yeah that isn't the life I've signed up for Ali: Bitches forget I already got a ring on my finger, like Ali: Legal or otherwise Tommy: Beyonce is here for your union Tommy: good enough for me Tommy: low key proud of ya not to be an enabler but like Tommy: I'll happily hooray you getting Drew to put something on it too god knows where that fuckboy's been Ali: Thank you! I will take that hooray because I literally had to mum Ro's arse and tell her to do the same every time Ali: AND had to do it in such a way it didn't sound like I was saying as much, like, your boyf is a cheater and we all know it sweetie Tommy: ugh 😷 glad you did though I hear your next door nemesis had to get herself to the clinic sharpish & i don't reckon she'd spread gossip that'd make her out to be riddled Tommy: 🦀🐛 Ali: 🤢😤 Unsurprised on both their behalf there but low-key furious Ali: he knows how that bitch treats Ro, and always has done Ali: there's being a cheat with any random hoe and then there's that...is it me or is that next-level careless? Ali: To the point it looks like he's doing it to hurt her, I'm sure he's just ignorant but, like, what the fuck?!!? Tommy: RIGHT? Tommy: like I don't doubt she ain't telling him all the ins and outs of her childhood drama but still Tommy: even with more brains than biceps he's gotta have a clue or two Tommy: OOOPS ACCIDENTAL COMPLIMENT Tommy: I'm offended on my own behalf Tommy: almost as cringe as once thinking he was hot 🤓😳 kms Ali: Yeah but it ain't like he's not been here...and she's still a cunt to Ro now, so Ali: Tries to be to me but who's listening, Bitch I'm deaf all of a sudden??? Ali: Hahahahaha Ali: He's attractive, to the point its kinda fact more than opinion so I don't think you're alone on that score Ali: If the notches on his bedpost are anything to go by...and I fucked him so can't be judging, consider your sins absolved, no hail mary's needed, maybe a few bloodys when I next pin u down for an IRL debrief? Ali: Oh wait, a bitch can't...I'll make it a Virgin Mary...WHEY! Tommy: True and I know he ain't got a bitch muted 'cause I aint rn either 👀 & my specs are on when I'm scrolling Tommy: I see what I see Tommy: 😞 Tommy: Fuck it lets go dancing Tommy: bounce that bump while you still can Ali: 'Course not, gotta 'low the bitch to slide into dem dms on the reg, if for nothing else than the ego boost Ali: 😒 Ali: I need that, lets go lets go lets go, its been TIME since I got to go out and not take the bubs Ali: I'll have to see who can have 'em though... Ali: Can't be mum, really selling how responsible a parent I'm gonna be to 3 by throwing 2 at her and fucking off to partay Tommy: SAMSIES...not that I'm going out with 2 kids on the reg but y'know Tommy: we on it 💃 Tommy: Dial up their daddy Tommy: he'll step up while we step out I'm sure Ali: Sure, just the one, like #oosh! toosoonforbants? Ali: Can but try, I'll get back to you when he replies Ali: Ooh, what are we gonna wear Tommy: I've got my elf cossie if I can only squeeze in Tommy: you could pin a red letter on if you've got something that won't clash 🤔 own that guilt like a good catholic 📿 Ali: Ooh, festive AND appropriate for my situ, I like it. Tommy: A for advent sweeties 😘 Tommy: can you cut my hair though I looking like the grinch if he was a blonde blue eyed dreamboat Ali: And Awesome! And Ali! And Ass! 😎 Ali: Obvi, you never could rock the long hair look, remember that dark period in time 😂 Ali: Can I try something slightly new tho? 🤔 Tommy: why the feck not gotta at least look ready to mingle like Tommy: 💔😂 Ali: Dubo not gonna know what's hit it and ya mans gonna know what he missing when I'm done with you! Promise Tommy: I'll hold you to it Tommy: no pressure Tommy: oooh maybe we could go shopping 😀 Ali: You know I'm winning boys back like its my business Ali: well, boy singular but that's enough, right? #greedybisexual Ali: I am always down for killing time snapping up killer #lewks, lets do it man Tommy: yaaaaaaaaaaas Tommy: careful I might hold you to that too #tipsfrommybabysiskms Ali: baby be wise tho 💞 where u at i'll come get u Tommy: about a lot of things yeah 👍 nws I'll come at you I need the exercise #aintforgotyoucalledmeafattylike Ali: alright well, RUN FORREST RUN Tommy: 🏃

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