#typed this on my phone so sorry for any grammar/spelling errors 😥

[total-drama-brainrot]

out of the three (four? if you wanna include ridonculous race) noah appeared in, which one do you think noah could have won if he cared about the competition

hot take; none of them.

he did care about the competition (at least somewhat) in the first season and it was objectively his worst. in island, he was too blinded by his own hubris to consider the fact that he was, for all intents and purposes, isolating himself in a socially driven competition. he was standoffish and rude, which would've been fine if he hadn't outright directed negative attention to himself with his comments AND refusal to participate in the dodgeball challenge, and he offered little in terms of both teamwork and team utility anyway. so being voted out early was a given, and a much needed wake-up call for him.

he didn't compete in season 2, but if he did i doubt he'd make it to the finale. i'd like to say he'd make it pretty far into action- both because action has a lot more technology and media references, which noah could play to his advantage as both an established nerd and a canonical hacker (though these aspects of him are mostly delegated to his biographies/interviews outsode of the show itself), and because we know he does learn from his mistakes in season 1 so he'd try to be a better teammate (like he does in season 3). but i truly and honestly don't think he'd stand a chance against powerhouses like courtney and duncan, or have even a smidge of beth and owen's in-competiton social game/likability, so he'd eventually be voted out.

and in season 3, as much as i disagree with the amazons winning the challenge, getting rid of noah there and then was the right play from a narrative standpoint. because, at the end of the day, he's a filler character. he doesn't have any engaging plotlines of his own to warrant keeping him around, and his only real use from a writing standpoint is to make snide comments and witty one-liners; when the remaining cast all have at least one subplot going for them, and you need to 'thin the herd', you get rid of the deadweight characters first.

by world tour, i believe he's only competing for the sake of it, and he doesn't really care about winning or losing; if anything i'd say he only went along with the celebrity manhunt bus chase because he was supposed to stay with chris/the total drama crew, and since he was fired from being chris' assistant he didn't have anything better to do (he's always been a passive character, so going along with the crowd for curiosities sake is very much something he would do).

but if he did care?

i think he'd make it to early merge. a noah who cares about the competition would try to take down alejandro for the sake of his own survivability (after all, how long is it going to be until team victory is gone and alejandro turns on his own teammates as his next targets?) thus making himself plot relevant enough to keep around- maybe even allying himself with heather to do so. but alejandro, whilst not as smart as noah, is far more savvy and capable than him, and their 'rivalry' would end in noah being voted out.

or maybe he'd embrace his villain-coding (watch island again and tell me he isn't villain-coded. he does a "mwu-ha-ha" laugh and says "excellent." he's so campy bond antagonist coded in island) and ally himself with alejandro to garuntee his survivability, helping him weed out the competition as a right-hand man. eventually, alejandro would discard noah- either because noah would refuse to help him eliminate owen, or because they'd make their way far enough into the competition that noah becomes less of an ally and more of a threat and have him eliminated accordingly. because noah might be the villain, but alejandro's the archvillain.

that, and i think the finalists of each season are already the best picks from their rosters. i wouldn't change any of them to give one sarcastic twink the chance of winning.

(i haven't seen ridonculous race but i'm fairly certain caring about the competition is part of his character arc in it? he comes in guns blasing and then gets sidetracked by being smitten with emma, at least that's my understanding of it. so nothing would change there.)