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dailydegurechaff · 8 months

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Honestly, Zettour, Rudersdorf, Ugar, and Lergan all trying to co-parent Tanya is good culture.

Zettour is the indulgent one that's far too much like her for the other comfort.

Rudersdorf is the dotting one enabling Tanya and Zettour.

Ugar is the one that spoils her rotten with gifts and tries to invite her to his family's dinners.

And Lergan is the token responsible one whose attempts at discipline are sabotaged at every turn.

In my eyes, every character in the Imperial Army is just one massive found family dynamic. No you cannot change my mind.

I thought just a bit too hard about all of their differences in trying to take care of Tanya, and suddenly instead of drawing, something else came out. Oops. This isn't edited very strongly, very sorry.

Through the walls, I can hear the sound of voices arguing. It’s getting late, and I really would prefer to be sleeping right now, but here I am listening to the unpleasant sound of annoying old men. This sucks.

“I’m just saying, with the way you act sometimes, I find it hard to believe you have her best interests in mind!”

“Oh would you relax, Lergen? You really need to take that stick out of your ass, I’m only letting her have a little fun.”

It seems that tonight’s two combatants are Colonel Lergen and General Zettour. I sincerely hope it stays between just them, but I get the feeling my hopes are going to be for naught.

“A little fun? You’ve been letting her have unimpeded access to your wine cellar! It’s completely irresponsible—”

“Tanya knows how to moderate herself.”

“Does she now? She’s still just a kid, you know!”

“Well, even if she doesn’t, she’ll only make the mistake once after giving herself a horrible hangover.”

“Have you considered you may end up making her an alcoholic?”

Ugh. I’m not sure why they’re arguing in just the next room over like this. It’s not their intention I don’t understand, I’m pretty sure I get that part. I think they might expect Tanya to feel bad if she overhears them fighting over her, so they’re trying to shelter her from it. It’s a nice thought, even if doesn’t technically matter because I don’t actually care. No, the confusion I have is stemming from their choice of location. Do they know how thin these walls are? I don’t think they do because I can hear just about every word perfectly fine.

“Oh, don’t think you’re completely off the hook, Rudersdorf! While we’re on the subject of things we shouldn’t be allowing Tanya to do, you need to stop bringing her to live fire exercises and weapons tests.” Oh, it sounds like Lergen’s moved onto the next target to harangue.

Rudersdorf is quick to clap back and argue his defense, “What? Why? Do you really someone like her could possibly get hurt watching a few little tests?”

“Yes, actually! Because the second Tanya walks onto the grounds, everyone is clamoring for the famed ‘White Silver’ to participate!”

“That only happened once!”

“Once that you told me! I have it on good authority you keep doing it!”

“Tanya herself said she loves flying!”

“Yes, well, she doesn’t like nearly getting blown up by experimental weaponry!”

“Who told you about that?”

I’m wondering about that myself. Lergen honestly has the tendency to be a bit of a mother hen, so I’d avoided telling him about it. Really, it was also for his benefit as well as mine, the poor guy gets terribly sick when he’s anxious. I thought I was being merciful when I decided to tell only Zettour that I’d recently flown for Elenium Arms again.

Ah, wait a second. Zettour. He’s been suspiciously silent now, hasn’t he? He hasn’t said anything in a while, so he’s probably just listening to Lergen and Rudersdorf argue. Considering he was just getting reamed out for the whole ‘letting Tanya have wine’ thing, he’s probably enjoying the fact that Lergen’s anger isn’t directed at him anymore. I wonder if it was him…

“Oh, Zettour, you bastard!”

Ah, it seems that Rudersdorf caught on to the same realization I did. Now the two generals are going to argue. What a joy. Lergen at least has the decency to keep his volume at normal conversational levels, even if his tone gets rather accusatory. The generals do not have that decency, so this is going to devolve into a shouting match. I really do not want to, but I’m going to have to go out there and tell them to shut up, aren’t I?

Uger, the only person speaking at a low volume and therefore the only person who I can’t hear well, says something unintelligible. Following that, I just barely hear Lergen’s sigh and the resigned words, “Alright, go ahead…”

In the next few seconds, I hear footsteps and then my door opens. Colonel Uger appears in the doorway.

“Tanya… are you still awake?”

“Yes, sir. Did you need something?”

There’s a loud noise, like someone just slammed a table with their fist, and Uger hurries to step inside the room and shut the door behind him. It does very little to mute the din of the argument.

There is a beat of silence as we both listen. Uger looks like he’s cringing.

“It’s uh… Have you been able to hear this whole time…?”

“Yes, I have.”

“L-Listen, Tanya… you should know that this isn’t your fault. They love you, and want the best for you. It’s only because they care so much that they disagree—”

Knowing where this conversation is headed, I cut off the incoming lecture he’s about to give me, “It’s fine. I know they’re only arguing out of love for me.” A bold-faced lie came out of Tanya’s mouth just now. It’s not something I believe at all, but I also know saying that will end this conversation as quickly as possible.

“Right… so long as you understand—”

“Oh, shut the hell up! What would you know about parenting?!” Uger’s kind words are unfortunately interrupted by one of the Generals yelling.

There is another awkward pause.

After a second, it seems like Uger has come up with a resolution, “Uh… You know, Tanya, my daughter has been wanting to see you again. Did you want to have a sleepover with her tonight?”

Yeah, I’ll take hanging out with a toddler over listening to this go on for who knows how long. You know it speaks to the maturity level of those old men that a little girl is more well-behaved than them.

Mind made up, I give him my assent, “Yes, sir, I think that’d be pleasant.”

“Alright, I’ll give you a second to get your things together while I go talk to them about the new plans.” With that Uger leaves the room, a stormy expression on his face.

Ahh, now they’ve done it. You know it’s bad when even kindhearted Colonel Uger gets irritated. It’s because he’s so compassionate that it’s always the worst getting reprimanded by him. If you can manage to piss him off, it generally means you deserve what’s coming.

I hope he doesn’t take too long guilt-tripping them, I really would like to go to bed soon.

#bonus doodle #ask #anonymous #youjo senki #the saga of tanya the evil #tanya von degurechaff #lergen #zettour #rudersdorf #uger #papa erich au #woah its writing for once #its short ok #youjo senki fanfic

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resident-gay-bitch · 1 year

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steve knelt down, hands reaching out for the messed up collar around els neck. straightening it out with a soft smile, he smoothed her hair down too.

“prettiest girl at school.”

she giggled, “thanks dad! see you tonight.”

“remember you have soccer after-“

“i know.” she drawled like it was obvious, and to her, it was, “bye!” she called before running off.

steve shook his head with a little laugh. he watched her scramble off into class in her new pinafore dress that he spoiled her with because she finally made herself a friend. he waved to her as she stuck her hand up and flailed it around behind her, knowing he would still be watching, and scurried off to her class.

steve loved his girl.

he couldn’t not love his girl.

she was the only thing worth living for.

he looked over to his left, after hearing a giggle, and met the eye of one of the mothers who had developed far too much of an interest in him for a married woman. he shot her a forced smile.

he finally stood back up, brushed off his knees and hopped back in the car, heading off to another tedious day at work.

eddie turned the music down… significantly, and quickly hopped out the car.

“dad! come on!” max groaned, hauling herself out of the car seat.

“yeah yeah.” eddie nodded, slamming his door shut, “you were the one who slept in, bug.”

“you were meant to wake me up!”

eddie leant forward on his knees and looked at her, “i thought you were a big girl, hmm? what did i buy that alarm clock for if you’re not gonna use it?”

max glared at him, “but you’re my dad.”

“and you’re my daughter, and my daughter knew i had a very important call to make thismorning so…”

max sunk her shoulders, “so you couldn’t wake me up.”

“there we go.” eddie smiled and let her on the back, “now c’mon, before you miss music.”

the little girl lit up and hurried towards the front office.

“hey!” eddie shouted, grabbing her bag from the backseat and shut the door, “school bag!”

“you can carry it!” she called back, waving him over to her.

“little rat.” he grinned, jogging over and scuffing up her hair.

she giggled and hurried inside.

“ah, maxine.” the receptionist leant over her desk, “late again?” she was a bitch.

max nodded.

“got a bit tangled up in sorts thismorning.”

the receptionist glared at him over her glasses and pulled out a late form for him to sign.

eddie filled it out, handed it back with a bitchy smile, and knelt down in front of max. he smiled and tugged on her braids, fixed up her fringe which was askew from her morning frantic.

“you have a good day, yeah, kiddo?”

“got it, dad.” she huffed.

the kid had an attitude, and eddie fucking adored it.

“got it, dad.” eddie mimicked, his tongue poking out at her with a little eye roll.

she giggled and snatched her backpack from him, “i got soccer after school, remember?”

“shi-uger honey iced tea, thanks for reminding me, bug.” he pet her on the head, “see you after soccer.”

max reached her hand out for their secret handshake - the shortened for running late emergency’s version - and hurried off for class.

eddie placed his hand on his knee to help himself stand and pet the desk, thanking the bitchy office lady again, because darned if he wasn’t a gentleman.

“oh, mr munson? hi.” a voice called from the other side of the office.

eddie froze in place, closing his eyes for a moment because he knew it was maxs old home room teacher who kinda definitely had a crush on him.

he forced himself to turn around, “ms summers.”

“late again?” she said with a smile, making her way over to him.

he shrugged with a guilty smile, “busy morning.”

“i bet.” she pouted, “it’s gotta be hard without mum around.”

eddie nodded his head, “yup… so hard.” it wasn’t really.

she reached her hand out for his bicep, “let me know if you ever need anything.”

“thanks… again.” he nodded and backed away, “ah… duty calls.”

“okay! bye now.” she waggled her fingers at him.

“bye.” eddie pumped his eyebrows and made a runner.

eddie hopped out of his van, slamming the door shut behind him, as per usual. he pulled his pants up a little, re-tying the arms of his coveralls around his waist to sit a little better. he rounded his van and walked over to the edge of the oval, where the kids were running a muck and balls were flying everywhere.

it was like a warzone and eddie was terrified.

not only was he scared that max was gonna get hurt - they’d already dealt with two broken arms, a fractured shin, and a concussion before the ripe age of ten - he was scared that max was going to inflict some serious damage on some other por kid.

his girl was a menace.

he caught sight of her fiery red hair running down the pitch, chasing some other little girl in a purple vest for the ball. max swooped in and kicked it away, over to a brunette girl that eddie recognised as her friend.

he met her once, ellie he was pretty sure, sweet girl.

a girl too sweet for his criminal in the making, but hey, who was he to interrupt this adorable little friendship.

at least max actually had a friend now. she’d been struggling with that for a while. eddie was just so proud that his girl was able to not scare yet another sweet little kid off.

when she told him she had a new friend, he took her for ice cream, and then they had fancy pizza for dinner, and he let her stay up an hour past her bedtime to watch her favourite movie. wayne got her a dirt bike.

he tucked his keys into his pocket and folded his arms over his chest, settled in to watch the madness that went about the soccer field. he had no idea what was happening.

someone kicked a goal because now the small cluster of parents observing were clapping and cheering, and one parent in particular was going haywire. clapping, cheering, calling out “that’s my girl!”

he was getting plenty of looks from the soccer mums that eddie couldn’t fucking stand. he hated every last one of those bitches and their mean, far too privileged kids.

eddie figured this guy probably wasn’t any better. his kid was probably a prick too, right?

he looked out at the field and saw little ellie giggling and waving out at the crowd, she looked ecstatic. max had rushed up behind her for a tight hug, congratulating her best friend on her goal. eddie looked over to who she was waving at, and it was the ballistic dad dressed in a fitted button down shirt and slacks that- okay, so this guy was kinda hot.

definitely asshole material.

eddie walked over to him.

“ellie’s your girl?” he asked.

it caught the dad off guard a little, but he smiled fondly, looked back out at the game which had started again, and nodded, “yeah, she’s mine.”

“max is mine.” eddie pointed out to his girl, “just wanna say thanks… max didn’t really have any friends before el came along. really cheered her up.”

“yeah?” he asked, and he seemed genuinely proud.

eddie nodded.

“same here.” he smiled, “el was pretty quiet, kept to herself. lots of kids bullied her. when she came home raving about some max with cool red hair and a skateboard i kinda went crazy and spoiled the shit out of her.”

eddie laughed, “no way. when she told me about ellie i spoiled her to dessert before dinner and grandpa bought her the dirt bike she’d been begging me for.”

the guy smiled fondly and stuck out his hand, “steve.”

“eddie.” eddie shook his hand, reciprocating his smile, “now, i gotta be honest with you…” eddie said, eyes back on the game as he leant into steve’s space, “i have no idea how soccer works, so, tell me if i need to cheer, yeah?”

steve laughed and slapped him on the back in that jockey way dudes used to do in highschool, “i got ya, man.”

“daddy! daddy! we won!” ellie came running from the pitch, hair messy and face sweaty.

“whoooo, yeah!” steve called back, squatting down to embrace his girl as she ran for him.

max flung herself at eddie too, wrapping her arms around his legs and catching him off guard. she usually hated hugging him in public. said it was embarrassing to hug your dad, that’s why they came up with the secret handshake.

eddie kinda melted. this was definitely ellie’s doing and now he kinda wanted to spoil steve’s kid too.

he leant over to smooth his hands over maxs back and kissed the top of her head, “how you goin kiddo?”

“ellie kicked a goal, did you see it dad?” max asked, looking up at him.

“yeah i did!” eddie gasped and looked over to the little girl, “it was spectacular.”

“super spectacular.” steve echoed.

the girls giggled.

“daddy, can we have a sleepover?” el asked, pointing at max.

“yeah, can we have a sleepover?” max asked too, stepping back enough to grab ellie’s hand.

both men looked at eachother then back at their daughters, “it’s a school night.”

the girls both pouted and whined.

steve looked over to eddie, swallowing down for a moment. this dad was kinda hot with his long hair and bandanna tied around his head, grease all over his body in that stupid tight white tank top. he was clearly a mechanic, which was hot on its own, but a thought steve had never had before.

“how about on the weekend?” he said, before he could catch himself.

eddie looked down at him, “the weekend?”

steve nodded and looked at eddie as he seemed to think about it.

“ah, i dunno yet.”

max made a whining noise, “why?” she huffed, “you wanted me to have a friend!”

“i know, bug.” eddie placed his hand on top of her head, “i love that you’ve got a friend but our weekend is kinda packed at the moment.”

it was the weekend maxs mum was supposed to have her, but she kinda had a tendency not to show.

max looked at the ground and pouted again.

“that’s all good.” steve said and forced a smile, “another time.”

eddie bit the bullet, “how about i grab your number, steve?” he said, thought for a moment and then continued, “you know… in case maxs weekend clears up.”

steve smiled, “y-yeah, sounds good.”

“cool.” eddie nodded, “hey girls…” eddie said, struggling to tear his eyes away from steve’s pretty smile, “go get your stuff.”

the girls rushed off to do as they were told, and steve stood again.

“uh… you got paper and a pen or something?” eddie asked, kinda forgetting about that part.

“erm…” steve patted his pockets, feeling for something, he was unsuccessful in his search until he reached his breast pocket, “i got a pen.”

“that works.” eddie grinned.

“uh,” steve looked at him for a moment, “what-“

eddie stuck out his arm, “just write it on my arm.” he shrugged.

steve did, “feel like i’m back in highschool, jesus.”

he laughed, “shit, yeah.”

“haven’t done this in a long time.” steve shook his head and finished off his number with a little smiley face.

“neither.” eddie smiled and looked at his arm to find ‘ellie’s dad’ written above the number.

just then, the girls came rushing back over with all their things.

“well, ellie’s dad,” eddie grinned, “i shall give you a call.”

“cool.” steve nodded.

eddie saluted him, grabbing max by the hand at the same time, “see ya el.”

“bye ellie!” max waved at her.

steve and el waved back their goodbyes and left for their car too.

“gross dad.” max muttered.

“what?” eddie scoffed, “what’d i do now?”

“ahh…” max said, as if the point she was about to make was obvious, “you like like ellie’s dad.”

eddie went a little pink, he opened the van door for her, “ah, no i don’t.”

“yes you do.” she huffed, climbing into her seat, “you were looking at him weird, like the way you looked at the old pizza delivery guy i wasn’t supposed to know about.”

“damn it.” eddie muttered to himself and closed her door, rounding the van to hop in himself, “and for your information, kiddo… i don’t like like him. he’s just… easy on the eyes, okay? he’s probably happily married anyway.”

“mhm.” she sassed, “if you say so old man.”

“old man? old man?” he squinted his eyes looking back at her, “that’s it, you get a can of sardines for dinner!”

“no!” max screached with a laugh.

“yes!” eddie called back, looking at her though the review mirror, and backing out of the carpark, “sardines for the rest of the week.”

“ewwww no!” max giggled, “so gross.”

“that’s what you get for calling me old, ya little rat.” he laughed and winked at her through the mirror.

as bad as it was, eddie kinda really hoped that maxs mum was a no show again this weekend.

***

if you enjoyed this, you can find the the next part and more here on ao3 :)

there's also a playlist for it, if you'd like :))

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