#um. so we sent in the application. even though its late. so now all we can really do is wait. and try not to think about it too hard.

[silent-sentinels]

well we're awake again. its time to have soup!!

[flufflepuffle296]

Heathers au: Beautiful Songfic

This is more centred around Veronica/Marinette so not really any mentions of Heather/Heather/Heather. Sorry if someone’s done this before I apologise I just got into Heathers like two days ago. Also I changed some lyrics and took others out to make it more “realistic”. Sorry I suck at endings, it’s 5:30am rn and this is my first fic so be nice please! (I’m on mobile so I can’t add the keep reading tag so sorry if you don’t like this) xxx

I brushed down my dress: I couldn’t give them anything to criticise me over. Everything had to be perfect. I had to be perfect. Chloé sat next to me, my beautiful fiancée, slipping on her kitten heels. She may be 3 months pregnant but no Bourgeois woman would be seen wearing flats. I was in a red floor length a line dress — I grew out of my childish pink years ago, before it even went out of fashion! My hair was twisted into two plaits that were knotted together into a stylish bun at the back. Chloé meanwhile had stuck to her white and gold aesthetic, currently in a slim fitting white dress, showing off her small baby bump, decorated with gold jewellery. I rummaged through my drawers, trying to find a lipstick, when a thin book toppled out. I picked it up, and laughed fondly when I saw what it was.

My old Collège and Lycée diary.

I flipped through it, landing on the page that stuck most clearly in my mind. It was the day my class reminded me of my current reality at that time, shocking me out of a bubble that had surrounded me during the summer holidays that year.

September 1st, 1989.

Dear Diary: I believe I'm a good person. You know, I think that there's good in everyone, but—here we are! First day of senior year!

And uh... I look around at these kids that I've known all my life and I ask myself—what happened?

I bit my lip. What happened? I knew darn well what happened. Lila Rossi. She came in, flaunting her friendships and connections, a new disability every other week to cry about, another rumour about me coming out every 3 days.

Alya ended our friendship, Adrien continued to cry about Lila’s feelings. Lila just kept doing what she did best. The class gave up on changing my mind and instead decided that calling me names would be better. Because logic?!

“Freak!” “Slut!” “Burnout!” “Bug-eyes!” “Poser!” “Lard-ass!” Were the insults they liked to yell daily. Yeah, they weren’t the most creative...

We were so tiny, happy and shiny. Playing tag and getting chased. Singing and clapping, laughing and napping. Baking cookies, eating paste.

Nino and Kim used to come over to the bakery when we were kids, where we’d gorge ourselves on sweets, before celebrating our sugar rushes by chasing each other in the park and then crashing on my sofa, cuddled in blankets and laying on top of each other.

Then we got bigger, that was the trigger. Like the Huns invading Rome. Welcome to my school, this ain't no high school: This is the Thunderdome. Hold your breath and count the days, we're graduating soon. College will be paradise, if I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful. I pray, I pray for a better way. If we changed back then, we could change again. We can be beautiful...Just not today.

I scoffed at my optimism back then. Them changing? They never did, I don’t know why I bothered trying at that point. I should’ve moved on but hey! We all make mistakes. It’s just that sometimes you make 11 friendships worth of mistakes.

“Freak!” “Slut!” “Cripple!” “Homo!” “Homo!” “Homo!”

I cringed as I read their old “insults”. They would write homophobic messages across my locker, getting Alix to spray paint a few slurs across my work after I came out as bisexual.

Things will get better soon as my letter comes from Harvard, Duke, or Brown. Wake from this coma, take my diploma. Then I can blow this town. Dream of ivy-covered walls, no smoky French cafés. Fight the urge to strike a match and set this dump ablaze!

I had purposefully sent out applications to universities far away from these people, from Paris. All three schools accepted me, something I can’t say about my classmates, most of whom were rejected for essays on false information (sourced by Lila) and a quick scan over the Ladyblog meant not a single newspaper would even consider my ex-best friend. Gabriel Agreste, as I later found out through my internship in America, had to bribe several schools with double tuition to get even one to accept Adrien, after he got exposed as sexual harasser and disgraced hero “Chat Noir”. I turned back to my diary, having to peel off rock hard gum from the page that someone had smeared in “revenge”.

Le Chiên Kim. Third year as linebacker and eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick.

“What did you say to me, skank?” He would yell, his fist raised in the hallway.

“Aah, nothing!” I then cowered. I may be Ladybug, but he was 150lbs of pure rage. No one can compete with that!

But I know, I know... Life can be beautiful. I pray, I pray, For a better way. We can be beautiful...

“Marinette! Wide load! Honnnnnk!”

He was the smartest guy on the football team. Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf.

“Hey! Pick that up! Right now!”

“I’m sorry, are you actually talking to me?” He used to snarl, his hands covered in sauce from knocking my tray.

I stood my ground, I had been practising for this moment. “Yes, I am. I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on me. You're a high school has-been waiting to happen. A future gas station attendant.”

Kim then smirked, crouching down to eye level and pressing a finger to my forehead. “You have a zit right there...” he pointed out, causing the cafeteria to laugh at my expense.

I used to ask myself “Why... Why do they hate me?”

And hear Adrien whisper “Why don't I fight back?”

Watch as Max Googled “Why do I act like such a creep?”

Listen in on Lila stamping her feet in the bathroom asking “Why won't he date me?” Clearly frustrated.

Kim panicking as he wondered “Why did I hit him?”

And Chloé sob down the phone “Why do I cry myself to sleep?”

I would stay up late, screaming, begging. At my lowest points I would cry out “Somebody hug me! Somebody fix me! Somebody save me! Send me a sign, God! Give me some hope, here! Something to live for!”

I remember when I first met my real friends. The famed trio had gone into the bathroom and I followed after them, clearly my throat.

“Who are you?”

“Uh... Marinette Dupain Cheng. I crave a boon”

“What boon?” Chloé asked, filing her nails.

“Um. Let me sit at your table, at lunch. If our class think that you guys tolerate me, then they'll leave me alone...”

Chloé threw her nail file out and began circling around me, running her hands through my hair, commenting that “For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure!” Before coming to a conclusion.

“And ya know, ya know, ya know? This could be beautiful. Mascara, maybe some lip gloss, and we're on our way. Get this girl some blush; and Kagami, I need your brush. Let's make her beautiful.” Sabrina and Kagami, chimed in, echoing her words.

“Let's make her beautiful...”

“Let’s make her beautiful...”

“Make her beautiful...Okay?” Chloé ordered, dragging me out with Kagami and Sabrina, driving me to her hotel. They sat me down, taking my hair out of its bunches and brushing it out. Kagami painted my nails a deep navy with surprising precision, manning my cuticles. Sabrina twirled my hair into a high bun, leaving a few pieces at the front to frame my face. Chloé came back from her wardrobe, throwing a blue blazer and grey skirt at me. I changed into my outfit for them, to which they clapped their hands in glee. They dragged me back to school, taking in everyone’s reactions to the new and improved me. This became my new daily outfit for the rest of the year — the class couldn’t find anything bad about it, and even if they did Chloé would threaten them with her father’s power.

I was happy with my squad. Kagami taught us Japanese and Chloé taught us American English that she’d picked up from her mother. I taught them self defence, under the guise of learning it from my mum, unknowingly training them for the day I would rip Chat Noir’s miraculous from him, before slamming it into Kagami’s palm. I needed help that day, so thrust them bee and the fox miraculous at Chloé and Sabrina respectively. They became permanent heroes, Kagami under the name “Noirette”, Chloé under the new guise of “Buttercup” and Sabrina “Renard Rouge”. Akuma attacks have never lasted more than 15 minutes since we got rid of that alley cat, and we’ve been closing in on Hawkmoth recently.

I shook my head, snapping the crude book shut, throwing the diary in the bin. Today was going to be the day I made peace with all that happened, our 10 year school reunion. Doesn’t mean I’m gonna make up with anyone, just that I will finally leave everything behind. I found my lipstick and smeared on the crimson lip, smacking my lips together. I grabbed my clutch and helped Chloé stand up, though she wobbled a little in her heels. I slid her miraculous into her updo, blowing a kiss at her as to not ruin her makeup.

We met up with Kagami and Sabrina in the hallway, Kagami in a wine red suit with gold jewellery, and Sabrina was in emerald green to compliment her red hair. We stepped into the limo awaiting us outside and set off, arriving at the school 10 minutes later. We walked up the steps, hitching up our dresses and arrived in the courtyard. It had been lit up with fairy lights, with stands of food and drinks scattered around the court. Our old classmates were huddled in small groups, whilst Mlle. Mendeleiev’s was in a large group, enjoying each other’s company after 10 years apart.

No one noticed us, until Rose pointed at me and whispered “Who’s that with Chloé?” The group turned to stare at us, trying to place my face. Adrien looked up from talking to Lila, who seemed to be flaunting a rather tacky Gabriel engagement ring, and whispered,

“Marinette?!”

The class began gossiping amongst themselves, “Marinette? Marinette? Marinette?!”

I ignored them, their childish ways were behind me, and walked up to Aurore and Mireille, fawning over their relationship. They turned Kagami, asking her about her life and squealing over her Olympic medal for fencing. I grinned as I watched my old class, happy that they had moved on from each other — well apart from Alya and Adrien, who were still hooked on Lila. I was finally, content! I thought back on my diary, one particular paragraph standing out to me at this time.

And you know, you know, you know, life can be beautiful. You hope, you dream, you pray, and you get your way! Ask me how it feels, lookin' like hell on wheels...My God, it's beautiful! I feel so beautiful... And when you're beautiful...It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Chloé boasted my achievements, my business, my awards, and the entire of Mendeleiev’s class started chanting “Marinette! Marinette! Marinette!”, much to my embarrassment. I boasted her’s in return, Sabrina revealed how far she’d come as a lawyer, Kagami swung her prized sword from side to side as she listened to us all catching up, laughing at the memories.

It really was a beautiful day.

[yandere-society]

Yandere!CEO!Taehyung who is either obsessed with his assistant who is going to work for another Yandere!Ceo (Like Jungkook) or a coffee store owner where he gets his coffee from but the store is moving to a new town

I got lost in the sauce bc I recently watched The Devil Wears Prada and I saw ‘assistant’ and ‘ceo’ and I went off.  Hope you don’t mind :)

Admin/Writer- Chinkbihh

Words- 6.7k

Trigger Warnings- Sadism, verbal abuse, yandere Taehyung

Actually, The Devil Wears Gucci

 You had always thought that ‘The Devil Wears Prada’ was an over exaggeration of what a boss/assistant relationship could be.  

Until you met Mr. Kim.

Meryl Streep as a boss would’ve been an angel compared to the monster who signed your paychecks now. 

 You had moved to the city with the assumption that jobs would be readily available for your plucking, however not even Mcdonalds was willing to call back for an interview.  After living three weeks in the city without a job, you told yourself that you would apply to anything and everything you came across before resorting to less admirable means of getting money. So when you came across a job position for being an assistant to some company, you had half-heartedly sent an application- no expectations for getting any response. 

 Apparently, this place was more desperate than you for it took exactly two hours before some nice lady was calling you and begging for an interview. This should have been the first red flag, for what kind of office job was more eager than a fast food chain? However the pay was nice and you weren’t in any position to shrug off potential employers, thus you agreed to come in.

 The following day you arrived at the company and sat down with the woman from over the phone, answering her questions with as much integrity as you could muster.  You were answering the stream of questions with ease until one odd one came up.

 “Are you fast?”  She asked not once looking up from her little clipboard.  The question threw you off guard.

“I-I’m sorry, what are you referencing?”  Your confident mask faltered for a second due to your inability to understand what the fuck she meant.  

“You’re going to be asked to make runs to the most random places throughout the city under harsh time crunches, do you think you could do that?”  She seemed sympathetic as she said this, as if she really didn’t want to put you through that.

 This should have been another red flag, but all that popped into your head was coffee runs.  

You just nodded, sure you could do some running around to get some wealthy people a couple cappuccinos for their ‘productive’ meetings. 

 “Are you sensitive?”  

Your eyebrow rose on its’ own accord and before your mouth could open to ask for more context, the interviewer interjected by saying;

 “Our CEO is a very…um, blunt man.  Some people don’t like that personality type so we rather avoid employing someone who will crumble under that pressure.” This was yet another red flag. 

 One that you didn’t bother looking at as you just smiled and told her, “I promise to keep my emotions out of the professional scene here.”

–

‘Blunt’ turned out to be a really watered down version for what the CEO actually was; a heartless bastard with no concept of empathy.  You later felt backstabbed by the interviewer (Irene was her name) for downplaying such a demon. But you could understand her incentive to not scare you off, how else would they get any employees if everyone knew about the CEO’s true behavior?  

After your brief interview, Irene declared you more than adequate enough for the position.  She decided to show you around before your first day the following week. 

The office was modern and chic with everyone seated at different sections depending on their department.  You got the sense that it was an elaborate operation given the high-rise location of the office floor and the expensive furniture. Even the fucking coffee maker at the cafeteria was more costly than your rent.  Despite the modern and voguish environment, all the employees Irene introduced you to seemed amicable and kind enough. You did however notice the slight eye widen whenever Irene told them that you were going to be “Mr. Kim’s new assistant.”  

There was something that no one was telling you, but everyone knew. 

 You didn’t discover what it was until Irene walked you over to a door and told you that it was time to meet the man you’d be working for.  

“It’s very important that you knock everytime.  Walking in without warning will make him furious.”  Irene gently told you as she raised her hand to knock on the mahogany door.  

However before her small fist could make contact with it, the door was ripped open from the other side and a girl rushed out in such speed you could barely catch her face. 

 The one thing you did catch though was the blotched mess it was with tear streaks running down it. You heard her sobs sound behind you and get further and further away as she ran out of the office.  You thought you heard a muttered; “insensitive jerk” as she passed by.

 Irene side-glanced you and gave you an awkward smile.  It was obvious that she didn’t even know what to do. “Um…sorry about that.  R-Rose has always been a bit of a crybaby.”

 She was a bad liar. 

 Irene leaned forward in the now open doorway and called out, 

“Mr. Kim?  Is it alright if I come in?” A grunt was heard but this was all the confirmation she needed before taking your hand and leading you inside.

The office was large with the outer wall being all glass, revealing the sky-line of the other tall skyscraper buildings in the city.  The walls were white but every piece of furniture was black, from the tiny lounge sofa pushed to the side to the very frames the abstract paintings were held in.  In the center of such room was a large grey granite desk that held a golden name plate that clearly read; Kim Taehyung (CEO).

Behind the desk stood your new boss as he ruffled his hair in frustration. 

 His messy strands were icy blue that contrasted the copper shade of his complexion, the sun having seemingly adored his skin but the top of his head favoring the cold. (Or hair dye, but that’s none of your business.) He was tall with a broad torso, yet he was slender.  His olympian body was clad in a suit that you dared not ponder the price of, knowing it could only end with you in tears. His intense and dark brows were pinched forward in annoyance, below them were his egyptian-like eyes that held raven colored orbs ignited with a fire you didn’t want to be on the receiving end of.  His face was slender but his features were anything but. His nose being fleshy but straight and his lips being plushy and berry-red. Spotted on his face were tiny beauty marks that were spaced enough to form a miniature constellation.

He looked up at Irene and scowled, “I told her to get Park Jimin for a meeting and the dumbass calls Park Chanyeol on accident.  Now I have to deal with this dumbo eared giant in the lobby who can’t take a fucking hint that I’m not selling any of his shitty products on my line.”  He grumbled with a surprisingly gravely voice that was so deep it sounded like the devil. 

 You connected the dots with the poor girl who ran out of the room only seconds prior, assuming he fired her or at least yelled at her very brutally.  He huffed once more and sat down in his velvet chair by the desk and finally bothered to give you a glance, just now noticing the person next to Irene.  

“Whose this?  Don’t tell me it’s another brainless bimbo.”  

He spoke of you like you weren’t in the room, which caused your brow to tick in annoyance. 

 Irene nervously cleared her throat and said, “This is Y/n, she is your new personal assistant.” 

 His face was unreadable and stony as he gave you a scrutinizing gaze, looking up and down your form to drink you in. 

 You wanted to shift nervously under his piercing eyes, but you didn’t want to be another ‘Rose’ for him to berate so you kept your calm.  Something just told you that he fed off fear. 

Then he spoke, “Go to Starbucks and get me a caramel macchiato.”

 He didn’t look away from you, clearly addressing you.

Irene bristled beside you, “S-sir, she doesn’t start until-”

You cut her off with a grin as you stared right back Mr. Kim, “I’ll get right on that.  Hot or iced and what size?” -

-

Kim Taehyung was a monster.

His source of nutrition?  

The souls, hope and energy of those mere mortals around him.

  In a way it was awe inducing how brilliant that man was. As much hatred people may have for him, one could not deny Taehyung his respect.  It took a lot of hard work to get to where he had gotten at the young age of 23. But that did not shake the asshole regime his employees had to suffer through. 

 He wanted what he wanted, when he wanted it and exactly how he wanted it.  And if you couldn’t deliver upon such demands? Then off with your head and pray you never cross Kim Taehyung ever again. 

 Taehyung was not a boss who would pull one aside and quietly break the news that your services aren’t needed anymore.  No. He’ll scream it infront of everyone in the middle of a conference meeting and throw in a list of reasons why you should reevaluate your life for good measure.  

People bent so easily to him, submitted without question.  What was once a quiet and calm scene of friendly employees will swiftly change into a frenzied mess at a drop of a hat whenever Mr. Kim walked by.  

Panic would cause people to make copies of copies in fear that they’ll forget the important documents they needed to give him. People would leave elevators once Mr. Kim entered, always granting him his own ride to the top floor no matter how late they were running.  People only spoke when spoken to during meetings and when a deadline wasn’t met, they simply didn’t show up to work anymore due to the fear of facing the CEO. 

However there was a special infereno for the role of his personal assistant, one that you suffered everyday. 

 You caught on quick that he enjoyed giving you nearly impossible tasks, and he cared not about how stressful or absurd the demands were.

 “Coffee and bagel on my desk in 10 minutes or you’re fired.”

“Go downtown and get me those dumplings I like, be back in fifteen.”

“Go pick up my dry-cleaning and set up an appointment for a message at that one sauna in the west side.”  

“Get me the new Gucci robe or don’t bother coming in to work tomorrow.”  

“I got an urge to have a dog, go get one for me by 4’oclock.”

“The dog you got me threw up in my living room, here’s the spare key so you can clean it up.  Clean the rest of the place while you’re at it too.”

“I want a private jet…figure that out.”

“The tire popped off on my car on the way here.  Go pop it back on, it’s two blocks down.”

“Call Jung Hoseok and cancel our dinner plans, tell him he’s an asshole and his mother is a whore.”  

The last request was something he asked often of you, he particularly liked you sending over really vulgar messages to people.  

One time he caught you trying to sugar coat something over the phone and called you into his office to have a ‘talk.’

“Y/n, I believe I told you to to tell Mr. Lee that he could call back when he’s done with his head being up his ass.” 

 He menacingly glared at you as you tried your best to keep a straight face. “What did you say instead?” 

“I-I told Mr. Lee that you would further communicate with him once you deem him more aware and intelligent.” 

 He chuckled and rolled his eyes.  “Funny, that sounds a lot different that ‘get your head out of your ass’.”  

It was silent for a moment and you really wondered if you were going to lose your job just because you didn’t tell someone to shove it up where the sun don’t shine.  

Mr. Kim sat back in his seat and barked out, “When I tell you to curse at someone, you do it.  I don’t care who it is. It can be the fucking queen of England and you’ll call her a cunt if I order you to.  Now get out of my office and make yourself useful by fetching me a coffee.”

Now you didn’t flinch when you called other wealthy business people with cursing insults in hand.

  –

A month had passed and you had slowly become the longest working personal assistant for Kim Taehyung. 

 Other employees informed you that the longest run before you was three weeks and two days and the girl ended with a mental breakdown in the bathroom.  

When they asked you how you managed to tolerate all of Mr. Kim’s demands whilst not getting landed on your ass with him firing you, you tried your best to explain your strategy. 

 You weren’t getting paid to give your opinions. 

So whenever he ordered you to get him something under nearly impossible time limits, you just kept your mouth shut and ran off to compete that insane task. 

 It was hard given he never gave you establishment names of the places he wanted stuff from, it was always given in terms of “that out place in the east side.” “That one restaurant I like.” “That one gallery I visited last time with Jin.”  

And you always only had a short time frame to figure out where he is talking about, go there and get what he wanted, and return back before his timer went off. Sprinting down the busy sidewalks of the city had become a daily thing that was required of you.  

You would go out on these runs 3-4 times a day and do ridiculous calls about 5-6 times a day. Sometimes Mr. Kim would have this look on his face as he told you of your newest assignment, as if he anticipated your objection because even he knew how absurd his demands were.

  But you never gave him that satisfaction, knowing that he will get the upper hand and possibly fire you if you interjected in any way. 

So you would just always smile and tell him that you were right on it. 

–

Kim Taehyung rather enjoyed studying you.  

When he first caught sight of you, he couldn’t help but think you were very attractive.  Yet this didn’t cause his heart to grow fond of you at all. In fact it was almost a negative given all the pretty assistants he had in the past turned out to be dumbest. 

Yet in a matter of a few weeks, you managed to prove him wrong and exceed previously set expectations.  

He knew he was an ass.  And he wanted his assistants to know that when they first met him, never would he want to give a first impression of being a lax or laid back boss.  So maybe he went out of his way to make things a tad more…stressful for you.

  Taehyung couldn’t deny the slight surprise every time you simply responded with that cute grin of yours and pulled off every task that he even doubted was possible.

  After a few weeks of this, Taehyung was forced to acknowledge the fact that you were here to stay as you have proven yourself more than capable.

 But that didn’t mean he stopped fucking with you.

No, if anything he did it even more.  

He found it so adorable to view that expression of yours when you were faced with yet another idiotic obstacle he set up for you.  The slight incoming blush as your face reddened with a frustration that you dared not utter. The pursing of your lips as if you were forcing yourself not to object.  The delightful eye widen when he told you to make vulgar calls. That funny little eyebrow twitch you did when he gave you an especially difficult command. And your pathetic little attempt to mask your displeasure by plastering on an innocent smile and chirping, “Sure, I’ll get right on that.” 

 It was better than any comedy Taehyung could’ve paid to watch. 

 Taehyung was well aware of his own sadistic tendencies, therefore it made sense that he would have an odd sense of satisfaction from pestering you. 

 However the endgame most sadists had never came true in this case; you never broke. He witnessed many assistants crumble under him; whether it be by crying, screaming at him or just plain storming out. 

 He always won in the end, his trophy being their crack in sanity and composure. But you were stubborn.  

You refused to let him get to you.  Maybe that’s why he found himself slightly dumbfounded by you.  You swallowed your pride and did his bidding with a dog-like obedience that you obviously faked.  Yet you never cracked and humored him with a spontaneous rebellion to his dictatorship, you followed along but masked yourself just enough to have him thirsty to hear your actual thoughts and feelings.  

He didn’t realize just how far his fascination went until he found himself at a club on a Saturday night, sat in the VIP lounge with Kim Namjoon to his left and Kim Seokjin to his right. 

 They were sat at a U-shaped booth that was dimly lit and above the chaotic dancefloor that sounded below, their elevated position giving them a glamorous view of the most famous club in the city.

“Let me get this straight, your plan is to blackmail your cousin into signing off on this deal?”  Namjoon clarified while pouring the trio drinks.

 Taehyung shrugged and raised the glass that was handed to him up to his mouth, sniffing the over-priced alcohol before taking a chug of it.  “Why not? Business isn’t meant to be all clean and squeaky.”

 “Still, you’re out of your mind if you think your uncle isn’t going to get you after this.”  Jin retorted from Taehyung’s other side.

 “Jin, don’t think that I don’t know how you avoided giving your tax statements to the IRS.”  Taehyung bit back, not liking the hypocritical behavior of his comrades.

All the men at that particular booth were wealthy ceos who ran as kings in this particular city.  Taehyung wasn’t sure if he liked the term ‘friends’ but at the very least he considered Namjoon and Seokjin as allies in the cruel world of business.  He tolerated the two more than he did most. 

The discussion went on for another hour of so, drinks fading Taehyung’s mind as the man’s speech became increasingly more and more slurred with every topic they covered.  These topics ranging from the current market to interesting endeavors they have faced lately in their line of work. The drinks continued to pour, the bottles were bottomless for such rich men.  His inhibitions were lowered as well as his morals (what little there was left for him). 

He didn’t quite know how or when she ended up in his lap, but he did nothing to push her off. 

 All the molasses covered words she purred into his ear seemed all too appealing.

Her hold on him was instantaneous, something about her screamed a comfortable sense of familiarity that he couldn’t deny for the life of him.

The rest of the night was blurry, but a clear conclusion formed when Taehyung woke up the next morning with a stranger in his bed.

  –

She looked like you. 

 Alot.  

The resemblance was striking and uncanny.  

From her (color) hair, to her docile little features, to the figure shape and even the height. 

 If you had a twin sister, Taehyung was positive that he just fucked her into oblivion. 

 Taehyung had awoken the next morning with a feeling of arms around his waist and another body sharing his satin sheets.  This was not necessarily a new sensation given he had his own fair share of one night stands. But he was not prepared for what he saw when he rolled around to see which nameless woman it was this time.

For a moment, his groggy mind couldn’t comprehend that it was not you, for his brain simply matched up the looks very easily and deduced it as such.  

However after a moment of closer inspection, he noticed that it was a doppelganger but not the real you. The alikeness only took up his mind for a brief moment before he was forced to spot something else while studying the intruder.  

She had bruises. 

 Hand marks around her neck, blotchiness of getting spanked on her ass, love bites that were borderline black littered her body and those ruby stained lips were swollen and cracked from assault of the mouth. 

Taehyung was taken aback by the sight of such brutal violence that marked her otherwise smooth and unbothered skin. 

 If he didn’t know any better, he would have assumed that this girl was the victim of abuse. Yet the fact that she was in his bed had lead to the conclusion that he himself must’ve been responsible for such injuries.  

He always knew that he was rough in bed, but he never went as far as he clearly did last night with this woman.  

It was jaw dropping and a twinge of guilt even glimmered in his otherwise dead heart.  

He must’ve put this girl through hell itself last night just to satisfy his sick primal needs.  And later when he made his way to his kitchen (after telling his maid to wake the girl up and kick her out) an alarming thought bestowed upon him that was too spot-on and shameless for it not to be true.

  It was no coincidence that the one girl he slept whom held so much resemblance to you lead to the wildest night that unleashed his true sadism like it never had been before.

  His intoxicated self had connected the dots for him to face when he sobered up.

He wanted to leave those marks and bruises on you…not her.  

–

Your body was failing you.  

The moment you woke up that morning, a sense of doom was in the air as you discovered your nose was stuffed, throat sore and stomach uneasy.  You were sick.

 If God had granted you a nicer boss who understood the human body and the occasional decline in health, perhaps you would’ve called in for a sick day.  But asking Kim Taehyung for a sick day was like asking the Devil to read a bible….you might as well have just asked for a gruesome death. Taehyung didn’t believe in sick days and you were not in the mood to begin another fruitless job search, so you decided to take some aspirin and soldier on to the office. 

 “Coffee, bagel…you know the drill.”  Was the first words Mr. Kim greeted you with when you entered his office for the morning rundown.  He seemed oddly quiet this morning and he refused to look up at you from his desk. Which was somewhat concerning given he always glared up at you whenever he barked out his demands.  You simply nodded and attempted to shrug off this break in character before going off to make your first run of the day.

 When you returned with the usual coffee and bagel in hand, you discovered that Taehyung was not in his office at all.  You stepped out in search of him and Irene seemed to notice your struggle before telling you; “Oh, he didn’t tell you? He’s in a meeting right now with Mr. Jeon.  Check the conference room.” 

You quickly thanked her and made your way over to said room.  

You swung the door open to see two men (one being Mr. Kim and the other being yet another handsome but youthful man in a suit) talking with hushed tones that held a underlying vibe of anger.  

“Taehyung don’t fucking try me I swear to-”

“I’m not trying anything, Jungkook.  I think you got a little comfortable with your position without keeping in mind how you got there.”

“Excuse me?  Was this your plan all along-”The other man (who must’ve been Mr. Jeon) suddenly stopped talking as he noticed your form standing by the now ajar doorway. 

 This caused your boss to turn and face what took the other’s attention from the conversation at hand. Taehyung looked at you with a scowl plastered on his aristocratic face, eyes ruthless as they bored right through you. 

 You froze in place as your blood ran cold.  

You realised too late that you had made a mistake.

You were in trouble.  

“What the fuck did I say about knocking?!  You worthless bitch, does your stupidity know of no bounds?”  Taehyung snarled, causing your stomach to drop.

 “I-I just wanted to give you the coffee and-” 

He cut you off, “Details of your incompetence do not interest me.”  

Maybe it was because you were sick that your emotions were a tad more sensitive than usual, but for the first time you felt your eyes sting with the incoming tears that welled up in your vision.  Your body already felt beat but now your self-esteem took a plummet as well. Taehyung continued to glare at you but you tried to blink the tears away before they could fall.

 “I-I’m sorry.”  You stuttered before rushing to plop his food onto the table before him and scurry out of the room.  

–

Your brain was pounding as if a hammer was rutting against it with a vengeance.  Your stomach was twisted in knots as your throat screamed for some type of soother for the scratchy ache it was suffering. You sniffed once more and attempted to focus on the task at hand, answering calls left for the office, but your lids kept dropping due to your drowsy state.  You still were licking your wounds after what had happened earlier that morning, for the first time on this job- you fucked up.  

You weren’t baffled at Mr. Kim’s reaction, in fact it was to be expected for him to lash out like that. The only cause of disappointment was in yourself.  You messed up when you shouldn’t have and unknowingly let the fucker get to you. You hated the fact that he saw you near tears, you hated letting him see you in a vulnerable state.  You hated that you almost cowered in fear and let him smell the fear off of you. You were no better than the girls before you.  You were proud to think that he would never get under your skin and that you would continue to pull everything off.  

But of course there was such thing as the ‘straw that broke the camel’s back’.

 You didn’t want to face him, but after the morning progressed into the early afternoon; you were called into Mr. Kim’s office.  

“I need a copy of the sales reports on my desk within the next hour.  There will be a board meeting at one so I’m going to need you to sit in on that and take notes.  I will be going out for lunch via the reservations you made yesterday so if you can call beforehand to double-check that would be great.  Also call Kim Namjoon and raincheck drinks at Oliver’s, tell him that I’m free tomorrow night but not tonight. As for now, my brother recently had a baby so I need to send flowers, go out and get some ordered and delivered to the local hospital.”  He said all of this without looking up at you once during the dialogue, eyes scanning a paper before him as his deep and cold voice filled the room. 

You sniffed out of instinct that can’t be helped when one is ill, to this he looked up at you in neck-breaking speed.  

You thought that perhaps he was going to comment on your obvious impaired state now that he was viewing you, but instead he quirked a brow and asked harshly, “Any questions?”  

You shook your head no as you ran the mental list once more in your head. 

 “Then get out of my office.” 

–

You waited for the elevator to ‘ding’ with it’s familiar arrival.

You needed to leave the office and get those flowers your boss had asked of you, but also you needed to be back in time for that meeting.  So once again, you found yourself in yet another rush. Unfortunately, the fact that Mr. Kim’s office floor was the very top one meant that you had to factor in an elevator ride to and from the top whilst going on these errand runs. 

 You sighed in impatience as a few more seconds passed, time eating away more than you would have liked it to.  

Finally you heard a small sound that signalled an incoming elevator, you entered it when it’s silver doors opened for you. 

 You leaned against the wall and awaited it’s closure, but right when it was about to shut, a pale and veiny hand stuck out to stop it. 

 He stepped in, his face being familiar but not enough for you to correctly place your finger on it.  He looked at the buttons but he didn’t click any when he saw that you both were heading to the main floor. 

 The doors closed and you both quietly felt the elevator descend downwards, the two of you facing the doors.  

Once again, your sickness caused your nose to sniffle and this brought the attention of the man in the closed space with you.

  He turned to face you.  His doe eyes studied you for a moment, before a look of realization sparked in his inky orbs.  

“Are you Taehyung’s assistant?” You meekly nodded, just now noticing that this was the ‘Mr. Jeon’ that was in the meeting you had interrupted earlier that morning.  

You felt his gaze run down your face (which you knew was most likely pale and sick looking with a reddened nose to top it off).

 “I’m sorry about what happened earlier…my cousin has always been a jackass.”  He told you gently with that high-pitched voice of his that held a light musical tone.  You felt your eyes widened in slight surprise at the ‘cousin’ part, but nonetheless you kept your mouth shut.  You wanted to ask how the hell this guy was related to the spawn of satan himself, Mr. Jeon having a friendly and amicable tone while Mr. Kim had  stick shoved up his ass 24/7. “How long have you been working for him?” 

You didn’t know why he seemed so interested in that, but given he was your superior you answered; “A little over a month now, sir.” 

 He snorted at the ‘sir’ part but looked at you pitifully as even he must’ve known how hellish that month must have been for you.  It was silent for a moment and you both felt the elevator slow down, telling you that you were about to arrive at the lobby floor.  

“This might be a little unorthodox, but my company has a paid internship program if you’re interested.  It only lasts six months but if your work ethic is good, we can hire you as a full-time employee after those months are up.”  He dug into his suit and pulled out a business card before handing it to you. 

The doors opened and he stepped out, calling out from over his shoulder; “It’s not much, but it’s better than working for that asshole.”  

–

Taehyung was…sinisterly pleased.  

When you had walked in that morning without knocking, he was thrilled to finally be able to reprimand you.  Sure, it was a small and silly mistake. But it was the first slip-up you had in a month, and of course he was going to pounce on that.

The image of your glassy eyes blinking furiously away at stubborn tears was too good for it to not be burned into his memory.  The embarrassment that burned your face with a gorgeous crimson glow was a mouth-watering sight to behold. When your lip wobbled and voice broke as you for once showed him a side of you that he never saw before (a broken and weak one) he couldn’t deny the bliss that overtook him in that moment.  

He broke you.  

He won.  

He wanted to see it over and over again, your watery eyes and pained face that was laced in humiliation.  The experience triggering a taboo sense of arousal that had Taehyung taking care of himself under his desk minutes after the meeting finished.  

How badly he wanted to be the master of any further emotions of degradation, sadness or pity.  

How badly he wanted that expression to be saved for his eyes only.  

How badly he wanted to push you to your limits….

It took a lot of Taehyung to not tease you when he had given you your chore list of the day.  He limited eye contact and pretended to be engrossed in a stupid HR letter to maintain an image of aloofness.  But, it was important that you saw him as cold and unforgiving. A sadist needed to be feared. 

He awaited your return eagerly for the meeting that was to be held later that day.  He wanted to see if he would have a chance to yell at you and potentially embarrass you further in front of a board of directors.  But when he finally walked into that meeting with expectations set of you being there; Irene was in your spot with a notepad in hand.

 “Where’s Y/n?”  Taehyung whispered in the middle of the presentation to one of his most loyal employees.  

 In response, she nudged over a paper, still frantically jotting down information that Taehyung lost interest in long ago. 

 Taehyung’s hands shook in fury as he read the lines over and over again. 

 It was a letter of resignation.

  –

(Two Months Later)

You sat in front of this old and serious man as he looked over your resume once more through his thick prescription glasses.  

Your internship with Jungkook’s company did not last long.  Not due to a falling out or lack of good work ethic on your part, but due to a mysterious tanking of his company as insider trading and supposed tax evasion caused the business to fail.  

Although, this was the story that was released to the press.  Loyal workers of the Jeon Corporation will tell you that Kim Taehyung had framed him in a effort to get rid of competition.  Somehow, this story was more believable to you than the one the news reported on. 

Either way, you were out of a job and desperately needed to find a way to make a living.  So here you were, interviewing for some shitty saleswoman position in effort to pay your rent. 

“I must say…you have a lot of nerve being here today.”  The old man grumbled after looking over his notes once more.  You spluttered in confusion at this rude comment.  The interview had been going well…what happened?

 “Excuse me?” 

 “We called your former employers for a reference but since your most recent employer is facing jail time, we had to call the one prior to that.  CEO Kim Taehyung sent us a fax that said as a worker you have ‘problems listening to specific instructions, lazy and incompetent, and the worst mistake my company will make by hiring you for you cannot handle a shred of responsibility.’” 

 Your mouth went dry as you pictured the boss from hell laughing evilly as he sent this fax, most likely trying to ruin your life as some sort of sick entertainment. 

 “I-I can explain plea-” you attempted to speak, only to be cut off with just a look. 

 The old man looked at you with critical beady eyes as he pointed to the door and said, “I think you should leave.”

  –

You stormed into the familiar office with a rage you had never felt before. 

 Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, and your very livelihood was just fucked with.  How were you supposed to pay your bills or even afford to sustain your basic needs when you had someone like Kim Taehyung telling all future employers that you were ‘the worst mistake a company could commit’?

  He called you lazy and incompetent!  Not once did you fail him in any regard bigger than forgetting to knock on a door one time.  You waited on that man hand and foot while allowing yourself to be degraded in the process.

 “Where is he?!”  You growled to Irene from her usual spot at the front desk.  

“Y-Y/n, calm down, okay?  I know what he did bu-”

“Where!”  You exploded, sick and tired of her always defending him despite all the evidence of him being a devil and ruining innocent people’s lives.

She looked in your eyes and knew that she wasn’t going to convince you to leave.  Irene sighed in defeat and muttered, “In his office.”

 You ran to his office and visously ripped the door open to enter his little lion’s den that so many careers have met their end in.

  He was seated in his lounge area, a glass of Scotch in his large golden hand as he looked up at you in a bored yet amused stare. 

You approached him and he just grinned, a whimsical delight spreading across the elegant canvas that was his face. 

 “Y/n, I was expecting you!  Can you get me a refill babe? Ever since you’ve left I’ve had to get my own and frankly, I’m kinda tired of it.”  He casually called out, shaking the glass in your direction. 

  Your brow ticked in annoyance and you noted that it only made him smirk even wider.

  So your suspicions were true; he did take pleasure in the pain of others. 

 “What the fuck?!  What was with that reference you gave to that company?!  You know damn well that I was the best assistant that you’ve ever had, and this is how you repay me?!  Why? Why do you hurt me so much?” You hoarsely yelled as your voice gave out in the end, sadness beginning to overrule anger as you realized just how little your life meant to someone as big as him.

 Taehyung was quiet for a moment as a somber look shadowed his face. 

 Then a chuckle. 

That chuckle bled into a thunderous and roaring laughter as he clutched at his stomach.  After a solid minute of him laughing like a crazed person, he wiped his tears away and seriously stated;

 “Because I like hurting you.  And you will learn to like it too.  Did you think you could leave that easily?  Don’t be stupid sweetie, it’s not a good look and I know you’re better than that.  You might as well come work for me given that no other employers in a hundred mile radius will hire you.” 

 He got up and slowly stalked towards you.  

“You should know better than to try to leave someone like me.  But don’t worry, I’ll clear matters up in that dumb little head of yours.  You’re not just an assistant and I’m not just your boss. Your my pet and I’m your master.  I don’t care if you like it or not, because you only have two options. Accept it, or never get a job and starve out in the streets.  You will only ever work for and serve me. Sorry I didn’t run that past you when you were working here earlier. I wanted to slowly progress our way there but you left before I could have the chance.  Now I have no choice but to push this all on you.” 

He was only an inch away from your face now, beaming at your shell-shocked state before he plopped his drink into your hands. 

 “Now….I believe I asked for a refill.”

(oooof this was kinda trash so srry but that.  It ran for longer than I wanted it to so im sorry if it’s long winded.  Also spacing might be weird bc my computer is on crack cocaine so that’s fun.   Anyway, for inspiration I used @mint-yooxgi‘s Baekhyun yandere CEO story but obvi hers is much better so like check that out. Lemme know what you think and this is chinkbihh signing off.)  

[mindmeafterdark]

An In Person Hang Up with @OneCheekyGal

Kai:

-The evening with Maxwell was long gone from my thoughts, seemingly eons ago, replaced by something much more enduring, and in a shocking turn, transformative. There truly hadn’t been anything like it since I’d suffered the loss of Cora. I had remained rooted in the past, as much as I tried to run from it, I could never escape the weight of her death. Though there were times my languishing had waned, it was a constant backdrop, training behind me for longer than a lifetime. 

That was until I’d happened to call for an appointment at the Toy Box and reached Camille. Her voice and its every inflection had been identical to Cora’s, my physical and emotional responses had confirmed it. Despite this haunting similarity, I felt unweighted and firmly rooted in the present instead of lost to the past. That was most notable in my expanding interest in Camille. 

Though the sound of her voice had initially initially hooked me, I realized there was something more that was luring me. The conversation may have been ordinary to any observer, insignificant even, but it was nothing of the sort. The underlying nuances may have escaped anyone else, but once her voice had captured my attention, I was entirely engaged. The evolution of her reactions, from distracted to considering to flustered to laughing and finally the abrupt farewell, she seemed to be affected as well. Without having seen her or had any true personal exchange, I was at the genesis of a building attraction, something I thought was an impossibility for me. I’d repeated her name several times during the intervening hours, reveling in how it felt on my tongue. 

And we were about to meet. 

The sun had burned away all cloud cover as the hours passed by or I would have left to arrive at the earliest opportunity. Instead, I had too much time to mull over how to present myself for this second first impression with her. It may have been lunacy to feel such a way before laying eyes on a person, but I was not going to take for granted this rebirth of feeling captivated. I finally landed on a brighter, blue t-shirt and casual slacks as opposed to darker attire. It suited my new locale, especially given the heat and proximity to the ocean. After a shower, a shave, a taming of my hair, and a very light application of cologne, I’d dressed and headed to my car. It was a short drive away and I parked just around the corner from Camille’s shop with five minutes to spare.  I walked up to the door, anticipation peaking, and used the back of my knuckles to knock.- 

Camille: 

*Somehow, as the day moved along, I worked to find a way to put Kai and his coffee voice out of my mind. I filled my day with cleaning every single display that was set up in the shop, straightened and re-straightened bottles on shelves, I even wiped down the water feature wall. The few customers who came through the store in person, I scrutinized the sound of their voice only to end up disappointed when I concluded none of them belonged to him. 

I was beyond curious and as the hours ticked by I began to worry. I didn’t want to lose my cool when he was here the way I had over the phone. At least over the phone he wasn’t able to see embarrassment on my face. I needed to take back control, if for nothing else than to feel like my normal, confident self. 

After checking the clock for the millionth time, I knew that was a lost cause. Time had started off with moving entirely too slow even while I had been cleaning as a distraction, and then suddenly, without any warning, it sped up like it was the white rabbit...late for a very important date. I scoffed at myself for that particular train of thought and went in search of my own white animal. Betty had kept her distance from me all day which was odd for her, then again, she always had been a good judge of my moods and must not have appreciated the energy I had been putting out in my efforts to forget the way a certain conversation had affected me.

Time had ticked down to minutes now, and my nerves had returned in full force. I didn’t like the way it made me feel. In my search, I found Betty curled up asleep on top of my desk next to a sample box of novelty masks that had been sent to me by a company in the hopes that I’d place an order with them. Originally, I had been on the fence about them, but now, as an idea formed, I could see their appeal. 

Choosing the female version, I returned to the front of the store and removed the mask from its plastic, slid the loops over each ear then checked myself out in one of the changing room mirrors. My laughter at the sight of the pink-lipped mouth and black ball gag printed on the front of the mask was immediate and left me feeling more like myself. This was exactly what I needed...there was no way he’d be able to disarm me like he had earlier on the phone while looking at this. 

As I adjusted the wire nose piece to fit better, I continued to laugh. All humour ceased when I heard a knock at the door, because of course he would knock! I had left it open for him, but given the way he spoke, I really shouldn’t have been surprised he was the proper knocking before entering type. 

After one last glance in the mirror, I moved to the door and swung it open with a smile...not that he’d be able to see it beneath the mask.* Hello, Kai? *snorting at myself, I shook my head and stepped aside, purposely not looking too long at him out of fear that I’d lose the return of my normal self.* Of course you are, duh. Nobody else asked for an appointment tonight. Please come in. 

Kai

-Anticipation mounted as I waited for her to open the door and just when she did… muttering about my name, I broke into a chuckle on sight of the mask she was wearing. It was an instant reminder I’d forgotten one, not that I needed it. It had been easier in Texas to roll around without one for the sake of appearances. I couldn’t help but continue to laugh as I stepped in. The ball gag mask commanding my attention for its bold humor.- Camille… I don’t even know your safe word. -dropping my lips close to her ear as she closed the door behind us, I whispered one more word.- Yet.

-Not the best of lines, but not the worst either, at least I hoped. While she finished locking up behind me, or attending to whatever business she had at the door, I had the opportunity for a better look . Her stature would have her tucked perfectly below my chin, just where Cora would fit. Her hair was also the same, rich color Cora had pinned into curls, though Camille wore it straighter, the light catching the nuances of natural highlights. With every detail a piece of the puzzle filled in for my wishful heart. I wanted her eyes… needed her eyes, but I knew no image of her could be complete so long as she wore that mask. Even with part of her face undercover, I was moved by something unseen, an electricity in the atmosphere, something beyond comprehension, but definitely sensed. I was determined, one way or another, to get the full picture before I left. 

As I stood in the store, my eyes scanned the area to see what I could see. The place was impeccably kept, I could even scent the cleaner in the air, though it wasn’t at all off putting like a hospital. From the water feature wall adorned with some suction cup sex toys, to the candid and organized displays, nothing appeared to be placed without thought or careful consideration.  I absolutely loved the idea of Camille owning a shop brandishing all the wares for proper kink, and sexual indulgence. I awaited the attractive proprietor before venturing any further into the store, after all the visit had become as much about her as procurement, if not more.-

Camille: 

*The sound of Kai’s laughter upon seeing my mask was enough to convince me they deserved a spot on my shelves, it had done exactly what I had hoped for, slid me straight into a familiar ease. I was used to making people laugh, I enjoyed it, and I enjoyed the sound of Kai’s particularly when it continued as he stepped inside. 

I had already turned off the OPEN sign so I took my time making sure the lock was twisted into place after closing the door. I was feeling proud as a peacock until he spoke. Thank the gods of kink my back was to him when he made mention of not knowing my safe word. UM WHAT?! That was not a normal thing to say to someone even if that someone happened to be wearing a ball gag mask. And holy hell, his voice was right there. Next to my ear. He had gotten close enough I could just barely smell the scent of whatever cologne he was wearing through my mask.

My mind went completely blank, offline, blue screen of death level inoperable. I was back to the phone call from this morning speechless all over again. Shitshitshit. 

How does a person even reply?! Should I pretend I didn’t hear him? No. Only a deaf person could claim that. And more importantly, since when does Mr. Speaks-Like-He's-From-Another-Time-And-Knocks-On-Doors talk like that? He was nowhere near flirting with me on the phone this morning...wasn’t he? 

So. Many. Questions. Zero answers. I was in trouble. 

Fortunately, as I turned around from the door, his attention was not on me. I took the reprieve to shake my brain back online only to realize...DUH, of course he would know about safe words, everyone and their mother knew what that was. And really, thanks to the 50 Shades of Trash, safe word talk was far from uncommon. Maybe he was just messing with me. I blamed the mask. Definitely was not going to order those fuckers. Absolutely not. 

Control. Where had it gone? I needed to regain it, at the very least of myself and return to being a professional. If that was still possible...Likely not, but I was willing to live in my own delusions for as long as Kai was in my shop. Deciding the shock value of my mask had worn off, I removed it and stepped closer to the counter to set it aside, and in the process, found my cheeky side...not exactly the professional I was aiming for but far better than the bumbling mute I had just been. 

My smile was still in place as I spoke, this time I made sure to take a proper look at his face since my previous avoiding tactic hadn’t worked at all.* Can’t say I remember the last time I had a need for a safe word, Kai. *I held back a cringe at my far too honest answer, I couldn’t take it back now. Not wanting to leave him too much time to interpret that confession, I spoke again.* So...what can I help you find tonight? 

Kai

-Even with my back to her, I could sense Camille’s fluster; I thrived off of it. I liked having such an impact on her, mostly because I had been bewitched by her in the course of a phone call. I could feel her movement, she was closer to me but to my right. My grin widened into a lopsided smile when her confession slipped, providing me insight. I was emboldened, confident, ready to get her out of that mask. 

I turned and stepped closer simultaneously, bringing my eyes up to find hers, and that was when the world flipped end to end. Everything engaged all at once, realization dawning that if my mind was playing tricks that it had executed to perfection. The atmosphere was sparking like a live wire. I stepped even closer.

The world stopped then spun. 

Stopped. 

Spun. 

Blurred out of focus.

Zoomed back into clarity.

My vision tunneled, magnetized to her. Gods...by the air I breathed, her every flawless feature was there. From the warmth of her eyes flecked with mischief, to the sweet bow of her lips with the slightest, unique upturn at their corners and her perfectly auspicious nose, she was the very image of the love I’d lost. I was sucked into the vortex of my past, her name on the tip of my tongue but I would not speak it. The beautiful woman who stood in front of me was very well, breathing, and undeniably of modern times. 

I’d been stricken by the familiarity in her voice, but seeing her identical resemblance, there was no passing it off as the fantasy of a wishful mind and a weary soul. With everything in place, the sight of her ignited a backdraft of reactions, and urges I had to immediately suppress. I did not want our first meeting to end up our last. I wanted to be her last first. My hope had been dismantled when Cora’s soul had dispensed…but now it was as if I could see that I was standing on the precipice of something that defied explanation. 

I was curious. Did she feel anything at all stirring in her bones?  Was I alone in this welcomed haze of déjà vu? I wanted to ask her. I wanted to know. I was fighting my own impatience. My heart stuttered in my chest, beating some erratic rhythm I couldn’t quite call to order, but I found a raspy form of my voice and did my damnedest to call my sanity to order.-

I am quite finicky about this particular item...perhaps you can show me to your stock of nipple clamps? 

Nothing novelty. -a slight command had returned to my tone, praise the Gods. 

Heart. Hammering. 

I was unused to being caught off guard, but I waited for her answer like she was on the cusp of revealing all the mysteries of the universe and a free round trip to the seven wonders of the world.-

Camille: 

*I didn’t know what to make of the silence that followed my question. Was he suddenly feeling shy about what he wanted to look at or was he mulling over my admission and coming to realize my sex life had been as stagnant as a murky puddle on the side of the road. I hoped it wasn’t that. I could work with coaxing out what he wanted to see, but I didn’t think I could recover from the alternative. 

Embarrassment began to burn my ears but before it could creep onto my cheeks he answered and relief flooded the blush, washing it away like a candle being snuffed out in the rain. 

Nipple clamps. 

He wanted to see nipple clamps. I almost laughed. In all my years, I never would have guessed he’d say that. It was a rare occurrence when I couldn’t figure out what someone might ask for prior to them telling me. It was a weird feeling to be taken by surprise like that, but the weirdness gave way to a thrill of the unknown akin to the way it felt when riding a rollercoaster for the first time. 

My lips twitched and I nodded as I moved past him, still keeping a mindful distance while heading toward the room hidden by the heavy black curtain, I spoke to him as I drew the curtain back and tucked it behind a hook.* Do you know what style you are looking for? 

*Moving deeper into the room, I grabbed a few varieties off the display on the wall as I listed the types for him, figuring if he decided upon staying where he was, I could bring them to him to look at, though something inside me I couldn’t exactly identify hoped he’d be curious about what else was behind the curtain, and might want to look at more than just nipple clamps. Not to make a larger sale, but to lengthen his visit.* Alligator clamps, with and without teeth, tweezer clamps, string and bead clamps for longer wear, magnetic clamps, spring tension rings that work with piercings, nipple suckers. Vibrating clamps. 

*I grinned proudly at my variety as I turned around and found he had definitely followed me and was practically next to me, so I used my hands as a table to spread all the styles out for him to inspect, curiously waiting to see which he would be drawn to.* 

Kai

-I couldn’t help myself from following her into the room I knew had been partitioned because of the types of items found there. I was lured to her in a way that failed definition, and was for more than her being a doppelgänger.  I felt like I could breathe for the first time in damn near a century. I looked around the room while she plucked some of her wares to share, impressed that her inventory was definitely quality over novelty, not that her shop was free of those items. It was the balance she struck that I respected. I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable, but my instinct was screaming not to back off. Her scent was… subtle, cherry blossom-esque, earthy, delicately floral and faintly sweet, too. 

I could tell she took care in selecting the clamps she did, my mouth hooking up at one side in a grin as she held them out. I picked up the vibrating clamps, setting them aside on the nearest shelf. I brushed my fingers over the nipple suckers, though I admired their mechanics, I set those aside, too. My eyes raised to hers, noting she was concentrating on what I picked, and I wanted to draw out all the suspense I could. In the end I left the Alligator clamps with teeth, black-tipped tweezer clamps with a weighted chain and… a stunning and expensive looking pair of butterfly clamps. I was not permanently discarding the other options, but I was engaged and had particular intentions that hopefully would result in extending our evening. Lifting the butterfly clamps, they struck a particular cord in this moment with her.-

I’m sure you know that most instruments of pleasure and pain have a history that came before their current use? -grinning, turning the clamps in my fingers, pleased with their weight-

These I have a true affinity for. They were invented by women, Japanese seamstresses, and originally called clover clamps. They were used to hold fabric in place so that the hand stitching was impeccable. I love their simplicity and strength. How the tension increases as you pull on their ends. The way they can bring about pain with a slow burn, like a good whiskey down your throat, is also divinity. 

Now, tell me, Camille, what is it that I set aside you would add back to my selection? -I raised a brow, awaiting her reaction and further insight into what her own taste might reveal-

Camille:

*Never before had I been so curious as to what someone might choose from my offerings. With each item Kai had put aside, I felt a tiny bubble of excitement grow and grow, like air being pushed into a piece of gum. Would it pop all over my face or would I be able to suck the air back in my lungs and control the gum without embarrassment. I wasn’t sure. Most customers checked the back of the packaging where the price sticker was always placed when considering items they were wanting to buy, he didn’t even bother looking. I couldn’t decide if that meant he was trying to impress me or if he actually cared about what he purchased, and that the price wasn’t part of the decision making process for him. 

It was as he began describing the history of a particular set of clamps that I decided his interests were that of someone authentic and not just some guy who thought a kinky lifestyle was the next cool thing to do. I was impressed. The bubblegum bubble in my stomach threatened to blow wide open, stretching dangerously thinner when he asked his question. 

The tone was one of someone who was used to being in control and the subtle command wasn’t at all off putting. In fact, I smiled at him as I sat down his choices, away from the ones he made clear were not to his liking, and moved back to the display wall. 

I hadn’t originally shown him everything I stocked. My initial selection was to gauge his true interests. Now that I had rather safely assumed price point wasn’t a concern for him, particularly after he kept the more expensive items, and discarded the lower end, entry level clamps, I knew what I wanted to show him. I took my time browsing my selection, I knew exactly where they hung on the wall, but if he was wanting to see what I would add to his options I needed a couple steadying breaths before turning back to his scrutinizing gaze. 

I wanted to impress him, now. I wanted my choice to go home with him and earn a place among what I was starting to imagine was a rather extensive collection of items he knew how to expertly wield. And if I was really being honest with myself, I wanted him to remember this appointment tonight every time he looked at this particular item, and be reminded of me. 

As I turned away from the display wall and popped open the packaging, I slid one of the wide flat disks out and held it up. To anyone else it would be mistaken for a delicately designed nipple shield, but I knew the secret it held.* I think you did a great job weeding out the clamps I showed, and instead of putting one back in the pile, I’d add this instead. 

*Returning to stand in front of him again, I reached for one of his hands and lined up the opening of the shield to his pinky finger.* Most people overlook the use of a nipple shield. It’s usually designed for comfort of the wearer and generally chosen for personal expression with all the different types of designs you can get them in. But these ones are different. They can still work with any of the clamps you’ve picked out but…you see this outer ring right here? *I slowly twisted the ring I knew he was watching and waited until he felt the tiny circle of points close in around his pinky finger. Gradually, I twisted the ring a little further to demonstrate the degree of control he could have with them while showing how they could add another layer of pain when combined with any clamp he wanted to use.* 

 Kai:

-She. Was. Stunning. Every reaction she offered complimented mine before it with a remarkable ease. I could sense her anticipation and it only multiplied my own. Her smile held an enigmatic allure, one I was sure came natural and was not practiced. 

When Camille set aside the clamps I’d selected and seemingly the options I’d discarded, the urge to say “good girl” was hard pressed to die on my tongue. I hadn’t taken her for anything less than savvy, but when she turned to go seek something new, the tension in the smaller room stretched like a rubber band, escalating my ambitions. She’d held out, and didn’t that just whet my appetite.

It was in that span of drawn out moments, I became aware my attraction was not to an unfinished past, or a recollection of love.  Time had changed me. Experiences had forced my growth. Modern influence had weighed in on my adaptation. I realized I had shed the Kai I was a near century ago, evolved into a different man, and with that my understanding deepened. It was Camille who drew the man I had become.

My eyes followed her and only her. I wasn’t trying to see what she was looking for, and when she turned away, my staring was unabashed. I blew out a quiet breath on sight of her pert and curved ass, small waist, and the strong shoulders of her petite frame. Her body cinched and swelled in all ways enticing. The opportunity to admire her physical attributes was both a privilege and an indulgence that only served to elevate my attraction. 

She multitasked as she turned back in my direction, opening the packaging while she walked, then revealing what she’d chosen. A sleek, brushed metal, thin disk, simple in design, a nipple shield of some variety. Curious, I raised a brow. Behind her casual words I sensed something more, and she did not disappoint that expectation.

When she took my hand, a surge of blood rushed through my veins as if her touch could conduct electricity. My grin hooked up at one corner as she slid the shield onto the tip of my finger, providing me explanation in a tone of voice that was sensual, and pleasing. When she turned the ring in demonstration, the points pressed into my skin, the biting sensation against the nerve endings of my finger inciting a riot of reactions. 

I was impressed.

I was aroused. 

I was captivated. 

I was admittedly a little smug at her reveal. I wanted insight into what turned her on and she had delivered beyond my wildest imaginings. Not only had she shown me something about her tastes, she had nailed mine. It didn’t matter that the clover clamps may have indicated my own preferences, making it less than a guess. What mattered was that she had paid attention, and what that exposed. My grin widened as my eyes raised, getting caught on another unintentional moment of show-and-tell. In subtle outline, under her green blouse, was most definitely a pierced nipple. My gaze quickly darted to the opposite side to answer my next question. And, yes, she had completed the set. I swallowed a groan, wanting to explore the entire landscape of her mind and body. My eyes finally made it to hers as the ring continued the pinch at my finger, and her hand had not dropped from mine.-

I am thoroughly taken with these. First, I’ve never come across them. Second, they pair with my taste consummately. Third… 

-I paused, knowing what I was about to say was more dirty than gentlemanly, but time was of the essence.-

Don’t you find that far too often the nipples are overlooked as an erogenous zone? 

Camille:

*I had never been one to seek out the approval of another. EVER. Not as a child, or teen, or even as an adult and absolutely not in any of my relationships, platonic, familial or romantic. It just wasn’t who I was as a person. I have always known who I was and had always been content with that. My self-awareness was strong, and stronger than that was my inability to yield to the approval of others. I had always taken the approach of if someone didn’t like something about me, that was their problem, not mine. 

And yet...

With the look in Kai’s eyes as I showed him how the nipple shield worked on his finger, and the way he spoke about them fitting in with his tastes, I felt the bubble of gum explode inside my stomach, leaving behind a desire to seek more of his approval. I didn’t know what to do with this feeling or myself, and so, I continued to stand there, staring into his eyes, listening to him speak in that coffee voice I found oh so irresistible. Until he asked a question I normally would have side-stepped like a landmine because I was still a professional, and knew better than to get tangled up in the inappropriate with a customer. 

And yet…

My head was nodding immediately and my mouth was running away with my agreement before my brain could even find the emergency break.*

OH MY GOD. Yes. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times my nipples have been disappointed in the past. I mean, what is the point of a gal piercing the damn things if she doesn’t want them to be played with?! That alone should be an open invitation, if you ask me! They are not an ornament you put on display on the mantel above the fireplace, never to be touched and only appreciated. And they are certainly not meant to just be looked at because they are pretty! Nipples deserve so much more than to be overlooked. They are not wallflowers. *I ended my single-breath tirade in a huff then laughed as I shook my head, feeling the burn of embarrassment high on my cheekbones.* 

Shit. I did not mean to unpack all of that *my hand moved in the air between us* on you. I’m not apologizing though, because it’s true...I’m just usually a lot better at filtering my thoughts around clients, but damn, if you didn’t hit a sore spot for me. Hell, I have even said those exact words before. 

*As I came to that realization, my eyes narrowed slightly in suspicion.* You don’t know any of my exes, do you? *Speaking more to myself, I shook my head and muttered my own reasoning of that away before I went with the next most ridiculous reason on the list of how he could say something exactly as I had myself.* 

I can’t imagine any of them knowing you and not mentioning it to me at some point. Mind reader then. That has to be it. There is no way you could ask a question so succinctly worded that it sounds like I was asking it myself. 

*I was so singularly focused on his question, I didn’t have time to consider all the revealing things I had said, least of all being the fact that I admitted to having my nipples pierced, I could die of mortification over that later, when I was alone like a normal girl would.* 

Kai

-Camille continued to impress and my amusement was instantaneous, expressed in a low chuckle, as she revealed her own frustrations. I was not a spy, nor a friend of an ex, or otherwise positioned to have known how my question would affect her. I had stumbled onto rose gold, which was somehow the color that bloomed in her cheeks, probably at the realization of her disclosures. 

The animation in her features only heightened her beauty, the way her eyes widened in kindred recognition, the way she huffed in exasperation as an exclamation point on a valid argument, and the casual dismissal of her assumed oversharing with a wave of her hand. 

I was taken with her candor and how her thoughts poured out without reserve. There was only one stutter, and not in her speech, but when she referred to me as her client. A fact for certain, but one I was immediately intent on changing. Camille deserved someone who could show her nipples proper attention. By the sounds of her venting, she’d suffered a string of disappointments and lackluster attempts in this department. 

Excitement tightened my jaw and stiffened my cock at the mere thought of an opportunity to show her how good it could be if she were put in the proper hands. My past relationship had been chaste; despite her aplomb, Cora and I had remained fairly traditional. My expanded experience only came after, and was predominantly male-oriented. 

Here and now, I was every ounce the modern man and not at all bound by antiquated formalities. Something cemented in me at the realization. In a world of possibilities that encompassed reincarnation and biologically immortal super humans, we should be unbound, and not destined to repeat the preceding cycle. It was a divergent path, one I would take without hesitation into undiscovered territory. 

I laughed easily, nodding my head in agreement to all she said, laughing more when she suggested I might be a mind reader, if I wasn’t an acquaintance of one of her exes. Comfortable, emboldened, all ice obliterated, I was ready to delve into every point she had left me to answer.-

I’d have a difficult time being a friend to anyone who neglected any nipples so egregiously, Camille. And while I credit your powers of deduction, I am not a mind reader, either. Admittedly, my eye for detail did reveal something before you confirmed it...I am a sucker for pierced nipples. -A sideways smirk hit my lips as I chanced another glance, making sure she caught it. It was well worth the risk of getting smacked to reveal my interest.- 

We do have a problem though, if I’m being upfront. You have everything and more I want to purchase, and I would certainly and solely support your business as a matter of taste. But, you see, I would rather ask you out. -leaning in, I wanted the weight of my inhale and exhale to register- And, if I were so fortunate to have you agree, I’d make sure your nipples were never wallflowers, or adorned with piercings for naught.  -I stepped back, wanting to give her the physical space to consider my words- I don’t want to be a client, if it means a conflict of interest. 

Camille: 

*His reaction to my unsolicited tirade made me laugh. A lot. The formal speech paired with the topic of pleasuring nipples was a dichotomy enough that I almost missed him admitting to already knowing I had piercings. The realization brought some levity back to the moment and I fought hard not to cross my arms over my chest. I felt exposed despite being covered though the smirk that followed his confession left me feeling more empowered than embarrassed, and my grin up at Kai was a genuine one.

The curve of my lips faltered when he spoke of a problem, and my brows knit together as I quickly went over in my mind how things could have taken such a turn for him. I thought things were going perfectly. He liked the product samples I showed and even seemed pleased when I tested the nipple shield on his finger. 

Much like when we had spoken on the phone earlier, he got straight to the point before I could even ask what the issue was, when he was done, my mouth fell open in surprise. He wanted to ask me out?! Not even if I was psychic could I have seen that coming. More to the point, he was willing to shop elsewhere despite liking my product lines  just to prevent any kind of conflict of interest for me. 

I was stunned silent for a few seconds, overwhelmed by the way he had moved in close and spoke low, reminding me of the way he had sounded earlier through the telephone. Except now, I had the added benefit of catching the scent of him and seeing his face and watching the way his lips moved as he spoke. Oh boy. 

I licked over my lips and pulled the bottom one between my teeth as my heart hammered away erratically in my chest. I knew my answer, and I offered another smile to him as I reached out to remove the shield from his finger.* Well. It’s a good thing I am the boss, isn’t it? While I normally say no to these kinds of situations, I’m finding it really hard to follow my own rule at the moment. 

*I slid the shield back into the packaging, closing it then waving it between us a little before picking up the rest of the items he previously said he wanted.* You don’t have to shop anywhere else unless that’s what you want, though I don’t see anything wrong with you supporting my business and us going on a date. *I moved past him, making my way toward the cash register and speaking over my shoulder to him as he followed behind.* I have no doubt with all of these items you are going to buy, my future nipples will be very happy. 

Kai

-I loved her laugh. Adored it. I wanted to record it so I could replay it. Of course, it wouldn’t bear the same effect if I did. It was that it was in reaction to me and its unforced quality laced together by the bell-like tone and uninhibited sound of it. Apparently we were done in the backroom, but I didn’t have time to raise any objections. I had a grin plastered on my face for a multitude of reasons. She had said yes, but it was not that simple. It had flustered her, I had noted it in the quiet that preceded the drop of her bottom lip, followed by the press of her teeth into it before she landed on her answer. She wasn’t done then. She took the shield off the tip of my finger, repackaged it and waved it in front of my face, a silent admonishing for even the consideration of me shopping elsewhere. Finally, there was the admission that I was essentially an exception, worth breaking a personal rule for. I did not take that lightly. I turned on my heel as her petite yet curvy body easily slipped by me. 

I normally did not follow, but she was also an exception for me. She might even succeed in getting me on my knees and under her command, were the circumstances optimal. That was a self-revelation I wasn’t expecting, as I had never submitted or even considered it. Those cards were going to be held close to the chest. For now. 

She earned a laugh that ended on a groan when she mentioned her future nipples being very happy. Even in jest, that told me she was thinking about me in a certain way, I welcomed the innuendo. As I met her at the counter, I had to resist joining her behind it. Instead, I remained a gentleman, ignoring the instinct to behave otherwise.-

Does the fact that you’re ringing me up also mean you’re kicking me out? Early bedtime, Camille? -I wasn’t about to let the night end so easily, but would respect any request she made. While I watched her carefully add up my tab, it dawned on me why she had hung up during her call, I must have flustered her then as well. That small epiphany increased my heart rate. If she felt an attraction just during the course of our discussion, maybe there was more than just coincidence to our meeting. Now, standing in her store, she couldn’t end it as she had abruptly done with our call, but she was giving it the most valiant of efforts with the move to close the sale. Toying with a small vibrator on a counter display, I kept my tone purposely casual.-

And after you answer that, tell me, do you like to be the boss in every aspect of your life? -my eyebrow lifted as I awaited her eye contact, along with her reply.-

Camille: 

*Hearing his laughter behind me when I joked about my nipples had a smile growing on my lips. I couldn’t help it now that he had made his interest in me known. I wasn’t sure that he was finished browsing, however his request earlier had been about nipple clamps, and we had successfully taken care of that. If he wanted something else, he could book another appointment. I had reached my limit of trying to maintain my professionalism while under such a scrutinizing set of eyes. 

I needed fresh air and food and to be out of my shop. It had been quite the day, that was for sure. As I scanned each of the items and set them aside, I gave him his total and pushed the card machine toward him, assuming he wouldn’t be paying by cash, before starting to bag things up. It was customary that I added a few sample items when someone made a larger purchase, and I wasn’t about to let Kai go without his. I rummaged through the box of samples below the counter, choosing the flavoured lube packets and condoms I thought were the best of the bunch as I answered his questions.* 

Yes, I am kicking you out, but no, not for early bedtime. *I smiled as I dropped the freebies into his bag then grabbed one of my business cards, flipping it over to the side that was blank, then grabbed a pen from the cup beside the register that was in the shape of a naked female torso.* It’s been a long day, and because I hadn’t planned on staying late, I didn’t bring dinner with me when I came in this morning. We can arrange another time for you to browse the rest of the shop, if you’d like? I’ll be better prepared then. 

*I lowered my gaze to the business card and wrote my cell number on the back before dropping that into the bag along with the receipt that shot out the top of the debit machine once he had entered his card and PIN. I held out the bag for him to take, and grinned because I had yet to acknowledge his last question. It felt like my answer would be one that carried some weight for him.* Do I like to be the boss in every aspect of my life? Not really. I mean, I am pretty type A with work, but outside of this shop, I’m less so. At least that’s what I like to think. I guess it just depends on the situation, really. 

*Nodding to myself as I finished answering his question, I reached below the counter to grab my purse and fished out my keys. He hadn’t said anything yet, and I wasn’t sure what to make of his silence. I hoped I hadn’t answered in a way he thought was boring like the nipple clamps he’d discarded earlier. Then again, I hadn’t asked him any questions, maybe he was insulted or simply didn’t have anything to say now that he had his answer. I blew out a breath and summoned up my lady balls. I could ask questions, too.* Do you want to join me for dinner? Have you eaten? It will only take a couple of minutes for me to close up. 

Kai:

-I watched Camille’s every move and as I did so, it occurred to me she was literally doing it, an in person hang-up. I refused to display my shock as she filled my bag with various accessory items either out of habit or propriety, slightly stunned. A part of me found humor in her blunt and verbal kick to the curb as it reminded me of my past love, and the spine she possessed. I almost laughed when she said that she was indeed kicking me out, confirming what I had thought. Perhaps I had been too forward...

That thought was quickly quelled and my ego soothed as she disclosed why she was actually booting me, and a pang of upset struck me, as she clearly stayed past closing time at her own expense. I would find a way to make that up to her as I never wanted to inconvenience anyone, let alone someone I was interested in pursuing. While she wrote what I presumed was her number on the back of the business card, I weighed the idea of asking if I could take her for dinner but before I could offer, she answered the question I had forgotten I asked. A grin tilted my lips up on one side as she satisfied my curiosity about her out-of-business preferences and images flashed in my mind...images of her in ways I really shouldn’t have allowed myself to indulge in. 

As she blew out a breath and gathered her belongings, I was about to speak up but she beat me to it, and my resulting smile was full blown. I wouldn’t have cared if I had just finished a six course meal, I would have developed an appetite just so I could take her up on the offer.-

I would love to join you,on one condition...You allow me to buy? - I held up a hand in anticipation of her protest, signaling I wanted to explain.- It’s the least I can do after I was the one who delayed your dinner. You’d also be doing me a favor since I’m just getting acquainted with the area. Aside from those things, if I’m being upfront, I cannot express how much I want to get to know you better, and that is after a mere thirty minutes in your company.

-I hoped she wouldn’t change her mind after my emboldened statement, but something told me Camille wouldn’t have asked in the first place if she was at all hesitant, and her independent spirit and self-assured nature only served to increase my attraction to her.-

Camille:

*I tried not to fidget as I waited for Kai’s answer on whether or not he wanted to join me for dinner. There was something unsettling about asking someone out that always left me feeling...overexposed. Sure he had indicated he was interested, but that didn’t mean he was looking to go on a date with me right away. The possibility of being rejected was still very real in my mind, and as I waited, I bit down on my bottom lip to stop myself from saying anything else. This wasn’t like our phone call earlier in the day where I could hang up on him because I was feeling out of my element and flustered. It was intimidating to put myself out like that even when I already knew he liked me. 

He saved me from too much internal debate on how to react to a rejection gracefully when he accepted and then demanded to pay. I was stunned and began to shake my head as he lifted a hand and continued on, explaining why. Was it not enough that he spent a large amount on products? It felt too much. I didn’t know what to do with that and laughed in disbelief.* 

Please don’t feel bad about keeping me. I was the one who agreed to the appointment tonight, I could have told you tomorrow when you called. *I really wanted to argue about paying for dinner since I was the one who asked him to join me, but again, there was something I couldn’t quite put my finger on that suggested I was better off not pushing the topic. Just like I could have said otherwise, he, too, didn't have to offer to pay. I smiled lightly and nodded my head.* 

I can play restaurant guide for you, sure. There are actually a bunch of great local places that are walking distance from here. Just give me a couple of minutes to take care of a few things. 

*I thumbed through the key ring I still had in my hand and locked up the register, grateful I had taken care of removing all the cash minus the regular float before Kai had arrived. I'd balance the day’s earnings in the morning. Next was returning to the room Kai and I had been in, flicking off the light switch and making a mental note that I’d have to return the items I’d left on the floor display back to their spots on the wall. Normally I’d pull the black curtain closed but instead left it open to help remind me when I opened for the day tomorrow. Last, I returned to behind the counter and flipped off the rest of the light switches along with the water feature wall, leaving the bubbling to continue behind me, just without its accompanying purple glow. 

When that was complete, I hooked my purse over my arm and gestured to the door. Next to it, I pressed the away function on the alarm panel and unlocked the door, opening it wide for Kai to exit first then followed behind him, sliding my key into the lock and twisting it to secure the door. He hadn’t said anything in the time I took to close up, but now that we were outside, I could leave my worry about being professional inside the shop and grinned up at him.* 

Maybe leave that in your car before we go? And then you can tell me how you feel about Thai food. *I gestured to the bag he still held and laughed at myself as I realized I had just contradicted the answer I had given him before about being bossy in all aspects of my life, but before he could call me on it, I quickly added.* Unless you’d rather take a bag of nipple clamps to dinner with us, it doesn’t bother me any. The staff there know where I work. 

*There was a gleam in Kai’s eyes that I wasn’t entirely sure was from the glow of the neon CLOSED sign that hung above my door, but as he held my gaze so intently, I got the impression he wouldn’t be bothered either. It was a look that left me feeling emboldened enough to grab his hand and lead him down the sidewalk, away from my shop, his car, and into the evening together.*

[angeltriestoblog]

I went from reluctant leader to ACTM officer!

Kind of a late update but after what seemed like an endless discernment period and an unforgivably rigorous application process (on my part), I’m officially the Ateneo Association for Communications Technology Management’s Associate Vice President for Documentations! And yes, I’m aware that’s a mouthful so from this point on, I am referring to myself as ACTM’s AVP for Docs.

I honestly did not see this coming though: Freshman Angel stuck out like a sore thumb in her home org. In addition to finding all upperclassmen intimidating as I do with anyone born at least a day before me, I felt like I was just… not feeling it most of the time. All I lacked was a button that read “I really wish I weren’t here right now!” pinned to my shirt. It was only when I was a sophomore, familiar with the organization’s events and able to see them up close that I realized that I didn’t remember going through most of them myself. Although I’m pretty sure I was present because it was mandatory for all new members, I don’t recall going to a general assembly, being briefed on the different departments within the org, and especially being taught what our core competency was. I was very content with doing the bare minimum as a Docs Head: going to meetings to take minutes and do registration, nagging at the project heads and point people to submit the necessary requirements for post-documentations, and smiling shyly and saying “I’m ok!” when people asked me how I was.

Although I was much more active in my second year, I never realized I wanted to increase my level of involvement until I went to LEAP, the three-day leadership training seminar in Zambales I raved about in my first semester recap blog post. It was there when I noticed the home aspect that ACTM prides itself on: everybody—regardless of batch and predetermined social circle—bonding in more ways than one, both with and without the influence of alcohol, just having a great time and joking around like they’ve been friends forever. I saw just how much ACTM was investing in me to help me realize that maybe I could be an officer too. Maybe I could contribute to the great culture that makes us so much of a family. But of course, that thought quickly found its way to the backburner the minute we boarded the bus back to Manila.

I never really saw myself as leader material after several failed stints in my old school: I was the secretary who forgot to ask the teacher to sign the attendance sheet, or the vice president that ran out of the classroom first during earthquake drills when I was supposed to be last in line to check if all appliances were off. (In my defense, it was an act of self-preservation.) I didn’t realize it then while I was busy wreaking havoc in every homeroom class I found myself in but when I finally grew up, for the lack of a better term, I came to the conclusion that being put in charge of a group of people would only bring disastrous consequences and I didn’t want anyone involved in that.

Fast forward to several months later: I had an individual consultation with my boss Chelsea, the previous holder of my current position, to help with her plans in running for vice president of our department. Somewhere along the way, she tapped me to fill her shoes—a request that was met with a high-pitched “WEH?” that probably shocked everyone on the third floor of MVP that day. I had been diligently doing my work for two years, she said, just as long as she has so I knew enough about the processes. Back then, I was very preoccupied with two other extracurricular commitments and had plans of joining three more the next school year. My goals and ambitions were all over the place and I guess it reflected in the way I skirted around the topic because she just patted my knee (throwback to the time when physical contact was still acceptable) and told me to think about it. Real hard.

I guess this lockdown period also served as the time for discernment I needed: I weighed the pros and cons, made the necessary trade-offs, and got the insights of those I trusted, mostly by pestering them with uppercase keyboard smashes. I’d think I had a final decision one day then wake up the next, completely changing my stance. It’s not like I didn’t want to serve—I guess I just wasn’t giving myself permission to believe I could. I can’t really pinpoint when it happened but one day, my brain went: “What the heck. What could possibly go wrong?”

—

After making the decision to run, I felt at peace, no longer overthinking about every single thinking that could possibly go wrong, just eager for the day application season would formally start. Well, that is until I received the actual notification from the Ateneo ACTM page that said a Facebook group for all AVP aspirants had been made. I tossed my laptop aside and started yelling, much to the dismay of my mother who was on the receiving end of all this panic. Over the next few days, I would watch the electoral talk that followed, a webinar of sorts that basically gave a rundown of the process we would have to go through should we want to take on the challenge. 

One of my requirements was a long-ass form complete with questions about myself, my leadership skills, the department, and the organization. I remember looking through the platforms of the Executive Board applicants during the first wave of elections and saying to myself, “Wow, I hope I don’t have to fill up something that long. I would cry my ass off!” only to find out that I would have to submit almost an exact replica of that and truly enough, cry my ass off. While Noelle, our EVP, was glossing over everything, I took these pictures on my laptop’s photo booth to express my frustration and sent them to my friend Julia, who was also watching via Zoom. I was actually very paranoid that I had my video on during the call and would end up exposing my contorted facial expressions to all 70 people watching the livestream. Thankfully, the universe was merciful enough to be on my side at the time.

Believe me, I wanted to get started with the work the minute the virtual meeting ended: I felt like I needed to so everything wouldn’t pile up and paralyze me on the day of the deadline. But even early on, I was already pretty overwhelmed and I couldn’t bring myself to do anything. So I lay down on my bed for the rest of the night and played Ribs by Lorde on repeat. It was an effective coping mechanism then but I instantly regret it the next day once I realized just how much time I had wasted doing nothing when there was so much to be accomplished.

I answered the introspective questions pretty quickly: thanks to my sense of self-awareness, I was able to identify my strengths and weaknesses well. What I really struggled with was the platform. I couldn’t generate any original ideas that I felt could solve the problems I spotted—I had wondered if I could just copy paste Chelsea’s platform and add comments such as “Same” or “RT” on the side and call it a day. Thankfully, this is what individual consultations were for. I contacted Elise, a co-Docs Head from the previous school year, and Gella, my boss back in freshman year and both were kind enough to bounce ideas off me and give me reassurance that the working drafts I had in my mind were actually worth executing. With their insight (and a lot of ice cream), I was able to finish my application form days before I expected to.

I also wrapped up shooting my platform presentation ahead of schedule. I couldn’t find any decent background at home besides this one cabinet but I failed to notice that part of its door was actually faded until I was already done filming. In an attempt to hide it in a way that still appeared on-brand, I slapped some star and cloud stickers on the video and claimed that it matched my own name. The only obstacle I had to overcome was practicing for my panels.

The fact that my question and answer session with the Executive Board was to held be online instead of in-person given our circumstances was supposed to comfort me somehow. But either way, not knowing which answers were going to be expected of me gave me a great deal of anxiety. To stave off this irrational fear, I prepared a Quizlet with 27 potential questions or points for clarification on one side, and my response on the other, which I rehearsed with just the right amount of uh’s and um’s interspersed to make it look as spontaneous as possible. Maybe my greatest sacrifice though was boycotting any TV shows or movies until I was done presenting because even the most mindless programming could take away precious brain cells needed to retain more important information.

On the day of my actual interview, I was feeling pretty confident. I had gone the extra mile by preparing an hour early and recording videos of myself answering my imaginary questions on my laptop camera. This way, I felt like I was simulating the actual experience. But not even this form of planning could have prepared me for the real deal. I wish I could tell you more about how it went but I was so nervous that I blacked out. I vaguely remember puckering my lips and flashing a peace sign every time I didn’t know the answer to something and had to respond with, “I will look into that if I ever get the position.” I also remember that not a single one out of the 27 questions I had committed to memory was asked.

As expected, I was the most relieved when it was over, I didn’t even feel embarrassed until much later on. I got out of my smart casual attire, slipped into some pajamas, watched a movie, and finished the tub of Coffee Crumble waiting in the freezer as a reward. Two days later, I had received a message from Chelsea asking if she could call me. My friend Iverson had said that results are announced to all applicants via phone call before being released to the public at night. It’s not a clear indicator that I was the one they chose, which was horrifying because who wants to be rejected over the phone? My younger self hated Joe Jonas and what he did to Taylor Swift for precisely this reason!

Thankfully, I was only met with good news. Chelsea had told me that I had been chosen by the Executive Board and I was ACTM’s new AVP for Docs. I hadn’t eaten breakfast at the time despite the fact that it was 10 minutes to noon at the time so it took a while for my nutrient-deprived brain to generate the appropriate reaction. The joy kicked in eventually: I jumped up and down and yelled I’M SO HAPPY so many times once the call ended that the words have started to lose meaning.

Since then, I’ve spent my time familiarizing myself with my roles and responsibilities while getting to know everyone else on the team. I’ve had a video call via Google Meets with the people in my department where we leveled off, got to know one another better, and set our goals for the year as we watched Chelsea eat pasta. Very wholesome! EC Wars was also pretty fun: all eight departments of the organization were head-to-head in different challenges. It kinda reminded me of high school intramurals but with less broken friendships. We had to auction one another a la Unsubtle Syota Searching, make a Tiktok introducing our department, its relevance and the roles of each member (which officially launched my career as the org’s official Kris Aquino impersonator), and had a chaotic game of Bring Me through Facebook Messenger. Yes, it’s possible but not if you’re a PLDT subscriber! I also got put in a group with other members of the EC for an activity where we had to make an IMC campaign for a chosen advocacy. As the Mind Readers (named as such because of the multiple instances we sent the exact same message at the same time), we were assigned to tackle sustainable fashion and I have to say that our finished product was, as Dani Rosales herself would call it, “hot”.

This week, we’re on to the more serious stuff: revising internal procedures, refining platform points, etc etc. The fear caused by my self-doubt is further compounded by our current situation, which is keeping us from performing our tasks the way we envisioned we would. But I am a hundred percent confident that since I’m with the right people and we’re all doing the very best we can, it’s going to be one crazy fulfilling year ahead for all of us. I’m endlessly grateful to ACTM for taking a chance on me! Shoutout, of course, to: (1) Chelsea for serving as the final push I needed to decide that serving this organization is what I wanted to do; (2) all my friends who told me I had nothing to worry about while I was being neurotic and who were the first to congratulate me and say that they told me so; and (3) my parents who listened to my rants even if they were 90% org-related jargon.

Wishing you all love and light,

Angel

[myselfinserts]

The choice is yours, don’t be late

“Hello, Mr. Aizawa? This is Mr. Aylward, calling to confirm your interview time. Please be here no later than 11am this Saturday. You’ll be expected to bring a portfolio of your previous modelling jobs if you can, along with an extra copy of your resume, a change of clothes in case the artists want to give you a test session, and your identification. If you wish to cancel, please call us before Friday at 5pm. The choice is yours if you wish to proceed with your application process, so please don’t be late for this appointment or the cancelling deadline. We’re very excited to meet you.”

Shouta had prepared everything the night before. He’d made sure he was cleaned up, packed a brush and hair tie just in case, and made damn certain he had triple copies of his previous modelling work. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to show he was experienced and committed. He wasn’t worried about the appointment. 

The one he was worried about though was his daughter. Midoriya and Togata both were busy preparing for the upcoming practice exams, and everyone else he knew had prior commitments. And he was not going to just leave Eri with someone he didn’t know on short notice. 

So he packed her day bag and brought her with him to the interview.

“Where are we going?” Eri asked, staying close and her head low. 

Shouta smiled fondly. “I have a job offer, and we’re going to the interview. If I get this job, I’ll be away a bit more for a short period of time, but it’ll mean I can earn some more money.”

“And money is important?”

“It is. You earn lots of money, you can buy lots of apples.”

Eri managed a smile. “I like apples.”

“I know, Eri.” They stopped in front of the building, looking up at the door. “That’s why I’m doing this interview. If I get the job, we can get lots more apples.”

She looked up at Shouta, her head tilted slightly. “Can I work too? To get you a cat after Melba goes home?”

“No, it’s okay,” he chuckled. “You enjoy your childhood. You can work when you’re a grumpy old man like me.”

“Can’t I be a grumpy old man now?”

“No, you be Eri.”

“Okay. I’ll be Eri.”

Shouta gave her a gentle pat on the head and the two went inside. 

The main floor was rather nice, with clean white walls and tiles, fine art hanging from the walls and ceiling, giving it the bold colors and making it feel more welcoming. There were stairs to the right and an elevator to the left, and near the back end between the two a rather nice desk with someone typing away at a computer. 

I guess I sign in here.

“Excuse me?” Shouta said, pulling out his i.d. “Shouta Aizawa. I’m here for my 11am appointment.”

The secretary took his i.d., flipping through to a page on the small dates binder off to the side. “You’re thirty minutes early. That’s good, but not ideal. Monsieur Allard does not like being interrupted while in the middle of work and is quite of the mind of people being punctual.”

“You don’t have to interrupt him. We can wait for him to finish.”

“We?” The secretary narrowed their eyes. “Mr. Aizawa, you’re the only person we’re expecting this morning.”

Shouta nodded, reaching down and picking Eri up, holding her close. “I know, but I couldn’t find a babysitter. This is my daughter, Eri.”

“Hello,” Eri greeted timidly. 

The secretary’s harsh stare softened a bit and they let out a sigh. “Hello.” They quickly pulled out the sign in sheet, having him sign them both in and then proceeded to escort them to the elevator. “My name is Chris, and I’m Monsieur Allard’s personal assistant and the group’s secretary. I’ll be taking you up to level seven, where you can wait for your interviewers to arrive. I’m sure Mx. Adaire won’t mind you both waiting on their floor.”

Shouta was confused. “Their floor?”

Chris nodded. “Each artist gets their own floor for their own personal work, with the exception of Mx. Adaire, who turned their floor into a sort of activity room for the cats during the day. Each floor comes with an apartment for every member of the group regardless if they are involved in art or not, and there’s a total of twenty-two floors.”

Eri looked at Shouta, head tilted slightly. “Is that a lot of stuff?”

He nodded. “Yeah. It’s a lot.”

The elevator came to a halt on level seven, and the moment the doors opened they were greeted by a fluffy white cat that looked tinged pink. She stared up at them, eyes wide and pupils dilated, before turning around and trotting over to one of the nearby cat towers. The room was filled with towers, play tunnels, cat toys, beds, a sitting area for the humans, and of course an area just for the litter boxes. Near the human area sat a person with bright blue hair, holding a tiny golden kitten and bottle feeding it. 

“Lucien,” Chirs called out. “Mind watching our guests until Étienne finishes prepping for the interview?”

Lucien looked up, not stopping the feeding. “If they don’t mind me focusing on the babies a bit.”

“We’re okay with that,” Shouta assured, trying not to act startled at how pink their eyes naturally were. 

“Then come on over. I’ll introduce you.” 

Shouta nodded and set Eri down, walking over and having a seat in one of the nearby armchairs. He let Eri get as close as she was comfortable with, her face plastered with a look of awe as she saw the mama cat laying down to rest while the other kittens suckled. 

“You can call me Luci,” the cat caregiver said, turning to point at the cats with their toes. “Mama Meatloaf here is a little tired from playtime, so it’ll be naptime for her and the babies soon. The big one there is Camilla, the one with the spots is Domino, those two calico boys are Cai and Leroy.” They settled back to criss-cross position, holding up the golden tabby. “And this little one is Honey.”

Eri smiled softly. “They’re so cute.”

Luci nodded. “Aren’t they? They’re really precious.” They nodded back to Meatloaf. “If you give her a light scratch behind her cheek, she’ll probably start purring. You can try if you like.”

Shouta knelt down, helping Eri give Meatloaf a scratch. They both barely touched her and she began to purr. Eri let out a soft gasp, looking at him with excitement. 

Even if this interview is a bust, at least she got to have fun.

“Dammit! This just won’t do at all!”

“That doesn’t mean you need to consider tossing it out the window.”

“You’re right. An incinerator would be better.” Étienne grumbled, throwing down his paintbrush before turning on his heel and hurrying to the apartment door. “Ceri, can you get my suit from the closet? Its the one in the gold bag.”

“Certainly, love.” Ceri went towards the bedroom, making quick work finding the outfit. “I don’t see why you’re unhappy with the piece. It’s a lovely piece.”

Étienne rolled his eyes as he jumped quickly into the shower. “But that’s not what I’m going for! We’re all supposed to do several pieces for this exhibition and I can’t do something like this piece of repetitive trash! Everyone expects more from me.”

Ceri set the bag on the back of the bathroom door, reaching into the cupboard to pull out two towels. “Then what is it that you’re trying to portray in this series of pieces?”

“Something that’s a challenge for me. God, why did I agree to let the theme this time be selected in a hat draw.” 

“Oh Étienne.” Ceri held out one of the towels as the disgruntled artist stepped out of the shower, taking the other and gently drying the glistening blond hair. “You’ll find your muse. And who knows? Maybe the interviewees today will give you some inspiration.”

“Mhm.” He let out a contented sigh, reaching out and wrapping his arms around Ceri’s shoulders. “Are those interviewees the reason you handed me the towel for my waist?”

“I, um-”

“You said ‘um’. It’s definitely because of that.”

“We have to be professional, and I don’t want to be thinking of what might have been if I didn’t hand you that towel.”

Étienne smirked. “Maybe later tonight you can find out still. If you behave.” Ceri turned beat red and Étienne took a moment to swipe a peck on the cheek. “When do interviews finish tonight?”

“Your last one of the day is at three.”

“Then how about tonight we go out for dinner? I need to stretch my legs.”

Ceri smiled fondly. “Sounds perfect.”

Étienne finished getting ready and headed for the elevator. He pressed a button on the little screen beside the doors, and Chris’s face appeared. “Chris, is our 11am here?”

“Yes, sir,” Chris said. “He’s on Adaire’s floor. Arrived early with his daughter so I sent them there to wait. I hope that was alright.”

“Perfect. I can check on their progress while I’m down there. Let me know when our next appointee arrives.”

“Absolutely.”

Chris disappeared and the elevator doors opened. As he rode his way down, his mind wandered back to the hat drawing, trying to pinpoint who submitted that troubling theme. Whoever it was wrote it sloppy, as though it wasn’t their dominant hand, so that ruled out anyone ambidextrous. 

Which, if he remembered right, almost all of them were. And he couldn’t remember who wasn’t. 

It couldn’t have been Lucien. They were too focused on Meatloaf and agreed to do whatever anyone else did, so they didn’t even throw their hat into the ring. The most likely candidates were probably Princess, Reginald, Phoenix, and Ceri. Oh well. It doesn’t matter. I’ll figure out something for this expo. I always do. And I always come out on top.

As he arrived on the seventh floor, Étienne looked over at the sitting area, immediately pinpointing the interviewee. He seemed like a decent enough model from even at that angle, but he wasn’t sure. Only a proper look at the face would give him a better idea. 

“So which kitten do you think is the cutest?” Lucien asked, half-jokingly. 

“I think they’re all pretty cute,” said the interviewee. “What do you think, Eri?”

Eri (the little girl if he had to assume) turned to look at the babies, who were all refusing to nap and instead were climbing all over mama Meatloaf. “They’re all really cute. But...” she pointed to the smallest. “She kinda reminds me of the scoop of honey you put in my warm milk. So I think she’s the cutest. She looks sweet.”

Étienne couldn’t help but smirk. This girl had taste. “Shouta Aizawa?”

Aizawa looked up, quickly getting to his feet and nodding rapidly. “Yes, that’s me.”

“Étienne Allard. I’ll be conducting your interview.” He turned to Lucien. “Would it be alright if we borrowed your apartment for the questionnaire and you watch over the child?” 

Eri immediately froze up, reaching up and taking Aizawa’s hand. He wasn’t sure, but Étienne could have sworn she was trembling. 

“If it’s all the same to you,” Aizawa said slowly, “I’m afraid Eri has to stay beside me during the interview. For her health.”

Étienne cocked an eyebrow. “For her health?”

“Yes.” He gave the girl’s hand a soft squeeze. “Her well-being is my top priority, so if that’s going to be a problem, we can see ourselves out.”

Now this is a surprise, he thought. “Storge...”

“Excuse me?”

“It’s nothing,” he assured. “Very well. We can do the interview here then.” He took a seat across from them and pulled out his notepad. “Ready?”

Aizawa nodded, sitting back down and softly wrapping an arm around Eri, who immediately relaxed. 

“Alright then. Let’s begin.”

[incorrectkingkillerquotes]

Q and A. . . Finally!!!

@druggeddraccus said: Favorite kkc character?  Favorite kkc storyline?  Favorite book/series that isn't kkc?  What made you all decide to do this blog?  

@halfthealphabet speaking!

Favorite character: Toss up between Denna and Auri. I will protect them at all cost.

Favorite kkc story line: I have a soft spot for the plum bob storyline.

Other favorite book/series: My list of favorite books is here. Happy reading!!

So I started this blog at like one in the morning because I kept comparing Hamilton to Kvothe and created a list of lines in Hamilton that are applicable to KKC. And then I thought, maybe I should make an incorrect quotes blog. Checked to make sure there wasn’t one, threw together a quick format, and posted the quote. I woke up with followers and notes and that’s the beginning!!

@frei-rancken:  well she ^^^ just invited me and i jumped in cause it’s fun. tho i’m rarely active as a mod on this blog which is shitty of me.

@logarithmicpanda: Elodin is my fave, followed closely by Auri (I was delighted when the slow regard of silent things was announced) 

In terms of storyline, I love when Kvothe gets back to the university, after adem. But also the begining of the university arc :D and so many other parts lol. 

I definitely recommend Uprooted by Naomi Novik and The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern, there are probably the best books I’ve read this year.

@halfthealphabet asked if I wanted to do it and I said hell yes. Then I proceeded not to be very active at all as a mod which makes me really sorry.

@kote-the-inn-keeper : My fav is probably... Kote or Devi. Yeah sounds about right! Um, as for joining I was just asked one day, and said sure! While I don’t post too much, I’m glad I was considered and asked <3

Story line wise, I really enjoyed too many of the arcs. Oh man one after another; all of them just so captivating and wonderful! But, I will admit, some were better than others. I really did enjoy Kvothe’s time with the Adem, and the arc where he screwed over Ambrose!

@kvothe-kingkiller : My favorite is Elodin. I love him so much. My favorite storyline is probably anything to do with sympathy or the magic in the books I love how pat actually describes how the *science* behind it works, unlike so many other fantasy series. Other than kkc I dont really know what my favorite series is... I really like anything by tamora pierce and I love game of thrones. Most other things I read are single books. I decided to do this since I loved what was being posted already and had a wealth of cabin pressure quotes that would fit perfectly.

@shineecandy said: wow congrats on your milestone! here’s a question for you: how do you deal with the wait???? it has been years. pat, please, i’m dying   

@halfthealphabet I read a lot and watch a lot of Netflix and check Pat’s blog obsessively. And write meta about it. And read more theories about it.

@frei-rancken: I just wait, and entertain myself with other things. Uni is stressing so i can’t focus on many other things. 

@logarithmicpanda We don’t. We are slowly going mad.

@kote-the-inn-keeper : I answered this in a much more long winded manner, so TL;DR I just want it to be wonderful and perfect so I will wait the best I can.

@kvothe-kingkiller : I watch waaaay too many shows and procrastinate on schoolwork so much that I dont often think about it. I’ve been waiting almost since WMF came out, gotten used to it a bit.

@dirty-n-evil said: Hi, huge fan of the KKC as well (obviously), but for the question I would ask the mods of this blog... what were each of your favorite moments through the books?  Not simply 'Name of the Wind' and 'Wise Man's Fear', but also 'Lightning Tree' and 'Slow Regard of Silent Things'? 

Hey, @halfthealphabet here

So I don’t think I can give just one favorite scene, but I will tell you that I thought The Lightning Tree was not a good addition to the Kingkiller Chronicle and that The Slow Regard of Silent Things is possibly the only flawless piece of writing I have ever read.

@kvothbloodless: Every moment is my favorite, but that being said, the scene in which Kvothe’s parents die never fails to make me cry.

@frei-rancken: It gets kind of difficult but maybe the Eolian’s pipes audition, or mostly when Kvothe tells stories about the Edema Ruh.   

@logarithmicpanda: all the scenes with Elodin crack me up! In the lightning tree, my favorite part was the ending, when you understand what happened. I love every single bit of the slow regard of silent things, but especially when Auri notices the child watching her and makes  a cartwheel. For Notw and Wmf, it’s a bit more complicated. Generally, I love worldbuilding scenes, and whenever a relationship progress in an interesting direction.

@kote-the-inn-keeper : I’m really swept away by all of it. From the characterization and the world building; mostly the building of languages. While there isn’t very MUCH, it’s still there. But, in NOTW I think my fav part was the boys trying to explain Bisexuality without quite having the proper words for it (assuming int he universe sexuality doesn’t quite fit into clear categories for words to be made). In WMF I think my fav part…. oh man this one is hard… but I think my favorite portion of this book was either his interaction with The Maer’s manservant or his time with the Adem and getting his ass handed to him by a small child. Both were very wonderful to me and well written. I can’t say anything about LT, since I have yet to have time to read it, nor more than the first page of SRST due to a lot of life issues and conflicts coming up. But, in retribution for such, I will do a ‘live’ read through of both like I did with NOTW and WMF where I took notes and shared them with you guys.

@kvothe-kingkiller: Honestly, anything to do with elodin. (tiny bit obsessed.) And in slow regard I really love when Auri find the gear and get’s it back to where she lives, (it’s been a while since I read it so I forget some of the names) and I haven’t read lightning tree in ages so while I remember the basic plot I dont really remember any favorite moment.

@freudcallsmedaddy said: What sort of theories do you have about the Cthaeh?

@halfthealphabet speaking. I think that the Ctaeth is more of Bast’s villain than Kvothe’s. So it might come back in other books, but not in Kvothe’s story. He didn’t know what power the Ctaeth even had. It could come into play in Kote's story . . .

@frei-rancken: While i read tons of theories i’m mostly a factual kind of person, so i go with it’s a fae it does not care about shackshit but it’self and its rules, it has a grudge against cinder so it sent kvothe to collide with him, but i’m totally lost on how is it going to happen.

@kvothe-kingkiller: My personal theory is that it’s a bit hyped as far as how much power it actually has. This may be just me being a science geek but the amount of decisions a person can make in the future are infinite. So infinite that even if you could see all of them, you could not possibly choose the course of a person’s life based on one conversation. You might be able to choose a basic-ish path but I honestly dont think its at all as powerful and scary as it’s made out to be.

@kote-the-inn-keeper : cRACKS KNUCKLES MMMMM BOY HOWDY AM I GONNA TRY AND KEEP THIS SHORT! Okay, so there are so many theories out there and I’ve read a few just to collect my own thoughts and ideas from. 

Now, the Cthaeh is a fae and a fae being. We know this because of Bast. It is a prominent and guarded fae due to its ability to tell the future and see the past; making it something VERY valuable and very tempting to try and encounter[NOTE: I am saying it only because we do not know (??) if the Cthaeh has an actual form and or even has a preferred gender really, or is a sentient being instead of a collision of other shit]. As, I believe, Bast said to Kote, it is actually guarded by the fae in the realm so that people don’t go to seek what it has to offer.

This leads to the automatic assumption that people had been seeking it and had been very upset and or disturbed by it’s tales of what was to come. The fae are taught to keep away, knowing that such information is already bad enough to know, let alone ask about. But that probably didn’t stop a few humans...[kVOTHE] or perhaps a few higher beings. Such as the Chandrian? I’m not saying that the Chandrian were able to go to the Cthaeh, but it is a possibility. It would explain some on how they knew where specific people would be and possibly what they would become. 

The Cthaeh also MIGHT not have started off as selfish and enjoyment seeking as we saw with Kvothe, but that also may be just a bit of a stretch. But, say it wasn’t. Say it was just trying to tell people like ‘Oh, hey, yeah in like 5 years your wife is gonna leave you for some hot headed dude who looks like this, so be careful!’ and that spiraled quickly out of control for obvious reasons. One would turn rather sadistic with the power, knowing it would just do more harm than good no matter how it was worded. But, that is just a very small half baked theory on the creature itself! But, going with such a creature or being was always in such a manner sadistic and rude, it would make sense of the fae to HEAVILY guard it. Bast did say people who got too close were killed, right? If I’m remembering that right at all. I remember something like that being said though.

To bring this sadistic being into play with the story for later and Kvothe, I’m going to nod to what was said above slightly; the Cthaeh wanted Cinder and Kvothe to butt heads and probably do SOMETHING to the course of the future. Also bringing back part of my theory of the Cthaeh not always being properly guarded, it may have accidentally sent Cinder on his strange mission and pillage at a more high hostility rate, depending on what was said, so the Cthaeh is sending Kvothe in to stop as much as he can before it’s too late.

TL;DR: Cthaeh fucked up when not guarded by the fae and sent the Chandrian on a brutal rampage to hide themselves and then told Kvothe his specific future to try and get him to steer towards stopping them.

So yeah, that’s what I got in a shorter version... I haven’t read LT, so if there was anything about the creature and Bast in it, I am not aware of it and hopefully will be soon when I get a chance to read

Anonymous said: how do you pronounce "Auri"

@halfthealphabet here I pronounce it like “aura” but with an “ee” sound at the end. Like, “or-ie” (Pat pronounces it like the others, I pronounce it incorrectly).

@kvothbloodless: I always pronounced it are-ee. Pretty much “sorry” without the ‘s’.

@kote-the-inn-keeper : “Ah-ri” OR “Auh-ree” OR “Are-ee”. Well, I guess theya re all the same now that I’m looking at them. Looking up now, I def say it like mod kvothebloodless. 

@kvothe-kingkiller: same as kote-the-inn-keeper and kvothbloodless

@displeasign said: What are you most looking forward to in book 3?         

@halfthealphabet: Closure

@kvothbloodless: Finding out how many of our half-baked theories were right.

@frei-rancken: answers. I really need to know how much of what it is said about kvothe is true and how much is just stories tell by people. 

@logarithmicpanda disaster. I want to know how Kote came to be

@kote-the-inn-keeper : Closure, answers, and an explanation as to why he chose to be an innkeeper to lay low instead of something else... i want my boy to be happy,,,,, le t kOTE BE HAPPY HHHHHHHHHHH

@kvothe-kingkiller: As others said, closure. on so many things I couldnt possibly list them all here. Also more Elodin. He’s really not a big character but he’s honestly my favorite, out of every book ive read and every show/movie ive seen. 

@octarine-ash said: For the q and a: What's your favourite actual kingkiller quote?                               

@halfthealphabet It’s such a quotable book but I use the quote, “You have to be a bit of a liar to tell a story the right way” very often. And I plan to get “Beautiful, seen” on the back of my neck. Also, I love the passage where Fela starts to fall in love with Sim.

@frei-rancken i cannot quote the entire book sadly. but... the kvothe quit grabbing at my boobs passage, the secrets as seen by Teccam, and like a shit ton of other ones.  

@logarithmicpanda the quote about loving something despite its flaws and because of them. It sums up my feelings towards the series actually.

@kote-the-inn-keeper : This one is super hard. There are WAY to many good ones and ones that i find really deep meaning in. And of course, some funny ones. The only one that comes ti mind this very second is a funny one: “You are the horseshit frosting on this horseshit cake.”

@kvothe-kingkiller: I cant find the actual quote through google and I dont really want to re-read both books on the spot to find it but I love when he’s being salty about math and poetry. Saying words for the sake of words and numbers for the sake of numbers are stupid. That quote got me through pre-calculus lol

Anonymous said: How did y'all create this blog? Is it like a side-blog or its own account?            

@halfthealphabet It’s a side blog. And it’s origin story is explained in the first answer :)

@princessmarysea said: This has probably already been asked but...what are your ships in kkc?? I love your blog btw it's really funny :D        

@halfthealphabet speaking: I have to say the only romantic ship I really care about being endgame is Sim and Fela (guys, their ship name should be Selas!!). They really are so sweet and wonderful. I want confirmation that Devi is into girls and guys (which is kind of a ship thing?). And I suppose this is a good time to mention that (although I love Denna), she and Kvothe would only have a disaster of a relationship at the point in their lives. Also, I ship everyone platonically. Especially with Denna because she needs more friends. And Mola and Auri could have such an awesome friendship as well.

@frei-rancken: Yeah mainly Sim and Fela. but if i have to come up with other ships Devi, Mola and Fela being in a happy poly relationship would be like... way too perfect. 

@logarithmicpanda Sim and Fela forever. I’m not a huge shipper though... Like if you throw any cute headcanon at me I’ll start low key shipping it.

@kvothe-kingkiller: Might be because I literally never ship anything, but... none. I mean I like sim and fela but as far as one that don’t already exist, none.

@kote-the-inn-keeper: so maaaaaaaaaany.... So many.... 

So: Kote and Bast, Kvothe and Devi, Kvothe and HAPPINESS, Sim and Fela, Wil and Mola, Wil and Sim (fite me..........), Fela and Mola (more soft/platonic), Devi and Fela, Hespea and Dedan, Tempi and Kvothe, Kote and JOY IN LIFE, Mola and Auri (PLATONIC ONLY!!!!!!!), Auri and PEACE IN LIFE (sobbing my bby let her be happy and safe pat i s2g), Kvothe and Auri (PLATONIC 100%), Kvothe and Denna, Denna and Fela (lOOK IT’D BE SO NICE JUST L I STEN), Denna and Devi (more friends than romance tho), Devi and Mola and Fela, and I think that’s all for now.

@jordantresser What do you think about Cameron Monaghan from Shameless as a young adult Kvothe? 

So @halfthealphabet speaking. I think he looks great and would act great, but also I hope they cast a man of color from Kvothe/Kote.

Hey @frei-rancken here. Well... yes and no. Like i love how he acts in general he is awesome but he looks a tad too devilish for me. Tho i would not be distressed if he were to be cast, it’d be awesome. And yes i concur with halfthealphabet it’d be great if the actor was a person of colour.  

@kote-the-inn-keeper : I didn’t even know who that was, so I looked them up. I’m going to say no, tbh. I just don’t think they fit with my headcanon face for Kvothe OR Kote.... I’d prefer someone who is of rromani origin to play Kvothe tbh; or of color. [EsPECIALLY BAST HAMILTON GUY DONT LET ME DOWN ]

@kvothe-kingkiller Again, it would be great for an actor of color to play him but I kind of think he was written to be at least very pale so that is probably not going to happen. And I think he has the right look, I’d say he would do a good job. (also yes, bast is not white, and neither are the cealdish. whoever casts this show, pls.)