#um... nothing else to say
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oh oh oh
#magik#polaris#Lorna Sally Dane#llyana Rasputin#xmen#im back. and x men#getting back into art lately#um... nothing else to say#good night
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jimmy stewart, rita hayworth and....webgott. only the stars smoke chesterfield
LINK TO FIC ON AO3 || Prompt - Day 5: Cigarette
The one thing that's most familiar to David on his return to E Company is the sight of the Chesterfield perched between Joseph Liebgott's lips.
(webgott chesterfield poster made using the charles boyer 1940s advert as a template)
@haguenauisforlovers
#webgott#my fic#sorry for posting pre-relationship during valentines week. but it compels me like nothing else.#don't think i need to say this but um. don't smoke.
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Uhmmmmm! aba
#guilty gear#aba guilty gear#had this cooking in my head for awhile#paracelsus’s face bothers me a lil.. wahhhhhhhhh#aba shops at hot topic. stamps foot. walks away.#dont have much else to say. did tumblr.. change the font??? snnffff#um. aba slay!#surprisingly this has nothing to do with the grudge. but if i put her in it she would look like this#kinda just a silly redesign… lol#nightmaretheater#…well not redesign. updated design????
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quick tfp optimus
#my art#optimus prime#tfp#transformers#ramble ahead but i cant believe how good tfp is wtf#i cant believe i watched wfc trilogy before tfp why would i do that. no offense to ppl who liked wfc i enjoyed it quite a bit but i#felt like nothing ever really happened in that show ever. idk. the animation was nice iloved seeing g1 designs in 3d but um. everything els#felt so slowpaced nd boring..dont get me wrong i love slowpaced shit but i felt like the whole show was building up to something and then#nothing happened#anyways. optimus.#i used to really not care about him that much because ooghh megatron i love villains but tfp optimus is everything to me hes SO wifey#watching wfc first didnt help either because he was honestly kind of an asshole in it and kept disregarding what every1 else had to say#but anyways. my wife. my girlfriend
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guess who forgot her own birthday until her brothers reminded her

i did it’s me. it’s my birthday
#im older im wiser uhhhhhmmuh um umumum#NOTHING ELSE TO SAY#my art#birthday#this is gonna get like 2 likes idc#bugza draws n such#🌧️
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i am NOT making it offline god said online friends only
#IM KIND OF MALDING RN FUCK THESE PEOPLE#they blow me off like 99.99 percent of the time but i dont got no one else to ask so i still ask jus to say i tried#BCZ IM REALLY TRYING MAN !!!!!!!!!!!! MAN.#anyway they said yes for once (yay i finally have someone to go to the movies w me!)#an then there was a fire in the middle of it so um. we had to evacuate#no ones fault ofc but man. wtf#an those two are roomates so on the bus i heard them talking abt like “we can jus finish watching at home” an didnt rly think anything of i#then they got off at their stop an i stayed on cuz mine was still a few more stops away#an they seemed a little confused when i stayed on but didnt say nothing??#an then while i was on the bus one of them called me an was like CHARLIE I THOUGHT U WERE GONNA WATCH IT WITH US AT OUR APARTMENT#an i was like ?????? YALL DIDNT TELL ME THAT???? HOW TF WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW#so i was like "ok well ill jus get off at the next stop an meet yall over there its not that long of a walk to ur apartment#so i did. an then right when i was abt to get to their apartment one of em called me again an was like “sry nvm :(”#“our roomate wants the living room tv an my stomach hurts”#SO I JUS HAD TO WALK HOME BY MYSELF AN IT WAS COLD AS FUCCKKK MANNNN#WHYYY DID YALL MAKE ME GET OFF THE BUS I COULDVE HAD LIKE A <2 MIN WALK FUCK YALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!#im tired of them mannn i need better friends honestly these ppl dont even like me#im kinda friends w the ppl who work at the movie theater an go to the community events but um. looks like that theater might be shut down#for a while. so#i might get even more online than usual this next few weeks i am fresh out of social outlets#fuck this place i h8 this people i need to hurry up an graduate already#i miss my friends in my home town#vent 👍#charlie words
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Hiding my shirt that says 'i am not normal about narratives that imply an inanimate inhabited structure is a living breathing organism' as i walk into a board room and pitch my idea that we should make more horror revolving around living architecture
#jay talkin#I JUST. I JUST. i'm thinking about old haunted house movies that have this grimy sticky feeling to the house#where the evil is not just afflicted to wood and bricksbut eminates from it as a hatred#the house itself hates you. the voice screaming get out is born on the vocal chords of the hallway#i am also thinking about The Hotel the podcast you should all already be streaming CHOP CHOP CMON NOW#which is of course a more unique and i would say more abstract sister to this concept#(said deeply positively the concepts and horror explored make my brain ping pong rapidly)#which is another reason you should be listening because it does its own thing that i think you should listen to and discover yrself :)#(and also it is far more than this this is just a tiny SLITHER of what is explored go listen NEOW)#and i am also thinking about. drum roll please. you know whats coming. yes it could be nothing else#kitty horrorshows anatomy which is TO THIS DAY one of the best and most influential games upon me i have played#a game that pushes this concept to its core grotesque emotional fleshy pulp and runs with it#anatomy is a game that breeds in anxiety and discomfort and bleeds a sincere love in the horror it portrays#that love is something i yearn to see in horror media! it is also present in the hotel AHEM AHEM#but yes anatomy is an experience like no other that you really should experience for yourself#(glances down at my shirt) um. um ok so ill leave the board meeting now thank you for listening#dear god my pain medcin kicked in and i instantly became the worlds least normal man didnt i. WELL!!! thats all of youse problem now
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#i promise i'll be active again when t3 stuff comes out#im still very milgram pilled but its very much a plate of corn type of situation. i don't have anything else to Say i just like to go insane#about it#also the winter blues hit hard#but we move! it is officially spring and we have survived#nothing has really happened in my life though#i got a cd player today as a very late birthday present so i had fun :3#i need to get interpol cds cuz rn im surviving off of obstacle 1 from a jukebox cd#which um idk if they still make jukebox cds but. they should#anyway obstacle 1 is an amazing song but like oouvhh i want a turn on the bright lights cd so bad#Need to listen to the full album constantly on loop and stare at the pyshical cd in my hand and cry like a stable person#i shall find it i shall i shall#i hope you all are well
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Holy fuck, man. What a trip Fearne has been on, huh?
You tell her how grateful you are to have her in your life, you flatter her, you tell her you need her, that you have to do this together. You have her make a promise that has this woman, born of chaos and fey, agreeing through shaking hands and a trembling voice.
You make her deceive your friends; you make her follow where they cannot know; you make her help you into this contraption; you make her feed this thing into you despite the fact that you both have been warned extensively of the risks. You make her watch you crumble and splinter and shatter and fracture and burst and implode. You make her watch you die, over and over and over and over, for a minute in agonizing bullet time.
You make her do all these things, because when she tries to back out, when she tries to not be the one who let you do this—how could you do this—
you tell her, "YOU PROMISED."
Because if there's one thing you know, it's that the fey do not break a promise.
#cant wait for her to fucking pissed for a very long time. shes really packing the entire human experience in a very short period of time.#critical role#cr spoilers#c3e77#fearne calloway#ashton greymoore#bells hells#just gonna get ahead of the um actually mfs and state that i am aware that its not confirmed that thats why ash brought up the promise#but boy howdy would it make for some great drama down the line huh?#edit: apparently i did not get ahead enough cuz ive had to turn off replies#since ppl were somehow interpreting this mini introspection piece as me infantilizing fearne??#anyway the first line is now changed to something a bit more neutral. after sleeping on it i do see how it was a bit aggressive at the top#other than that im not sure how else to reword without completely disregarding the core of the post#i might make more posts addressing this but im not sure yet. i wanna try to approach it in the best way possible.#but if it helps any the point of the post was not to say fearne had no agency. she had plenty of moments where she tilted one way or the#other. the POINT was to just shine some light on the emotional pressure she had been put under.#hasnt your friend ever asked you to keep a secret or promise that felt wrong or unsafe or made you anxious?#it has nothing to do with the amount of agency she had. ash wasnt holding a knife to her throat and forcing her to follow against her will#all i was trying to do was take this detail about his reminder of the promise that i thought was interesting and have some fun writing an#overview of the kinda stress she was under BEFORE theyd reached that scene. this entire ep was everyone discussing how grateful they were#for this family theyd made. and while im not saying ash was PURPOSELY emotionally manipulating fearne..#there is a level of unintentional manipulation when you pair the severity of his request with the convo theyd had 2 seconds prior#as well as the desperate need they all have to save each other NO MATTER WHAT.#ash was giving incredibly strong energy of a friend who peer pressures you into helping them do something that you know in your gut WILL#cause problems. hes a fucked up guy. theyre all fucked up guys. even if he didnt mean to “force” her into anything the pressure was THERE.#<- i feel like all of this overall gets my message across. i think maybe ill clean it up later into its own post.#im gonna try not to rush myself to get it done tho.#im under no obligation to explain myself. especially when ppl approach the misunderstanding by being rude af. but i do think it CAN#be clarified so id at least like to try to some degree
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no bc why did they have to be like that.


im sorry but if you don’t see the homosexual tension or at least METAPHOR between these two for the entire fucking show you are literally blind or a child
#shut the fuck up im normal.#YOU CANT LOOK AT SOMEONE LIKE THAT😭#hes watching his bf nut but magically yk#like their whole relationship is just. um. unusual but it’s like normal everything in a magical context intentionally!#and that’s why viren saying he was done with dark magic n him had the connotation of a divorce bc of everything they had done magically yea#viravos#aaravos#viren#like even the creators acknowledge the cosmic connection between them bro#if nothing else they invented a whole new typa queerplatonic#THEYRE SOMEHOW GOOD FOR EACH OTHER IN A WEIRD WAY#self spaghettification#riley rambles#50
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I can't remember who said this but there was this one dev who said that when making romanceable characters they have to be attractive in some way (personality, looks, not too morally fucked up etc). and since I read that, the statement hasn't left my mind and I'm very aware now of whenever outside influence and modern discourse get to me or other writers. like just yesterday I found myself rewriting a scene to be more "comfortable" to witness, even though the point was to be emotionally charged and face a difficult topic the character had been actively lying about. but some things can't be glossed over. sometimes it's good when media grabs you by the shoulders and makes you face horrible shit. it's good when media makes you uncomfortable even if it's coming from a ~romanceable companion~. that means it's working. if you remain comfortable forever you learn nothing.
I bring this up bc the veilguard companions are the perfect example and victims of the "romanceable characters need to be attractive" mindset. they don't have ugly sides, they don't fight with each other--and I mean really fight--they don't have controversial opinions or do problematic things. they don't ever question your authority over their lives and why you're the guy in charge. they are nice and perfect and their problems aren't really that serious and can be fixed by simply having a therapy session w rook (bc being possessed or gaining new magic isn't a big deal in a world where previously such events are Very distressing and hard to control). they are further proof that trying too hard to make something attractive has the complete opposite effect if your brain isn't the size of a pebble.
it's overall very frustrating that big game developers continue to be so spineless and I'm not giving anyone a pass for shallow writing, especially from a franchise that is known to have complex characters. none of this is impressive after the first three dragon age games, which were well loved and dissected and debated for years after their release. that isn't to say these games don't have kind characters, having that balance is why I personally like dark fantasy and liked what the dragon age games offered (whenever the writing was good..). it's not dark for the sake of being dark (see grimdark), there's a reason why these things are happening, and in this world no one is completely innocent even if they have good intentions. most people like when their characters aren't always kind or agreeable, bc it's extremely rewarding to finally find that middle ground (of course I have to bring up larian, who made bg3 and proved just how much people appreciate flawed characters, see astarion). conflict is the driving force of a story, no matter what it is. even the most sickeningly sweet cozy slice of life story will have some kind of conflict. it's unavoidable. that's life. taking that away is setting yourself up for failure and all that remains is a boring story full of boring people. no one cares about characters who have their lives together.
(the post is technically over but I wanted to put some final thoughts under the cut bc this got longer than I meant)
I want to go back to the statement real quick... like i do agree, it's true as writers we'll subconsciously (or consciously if you're insecure) try to make our characters appealing, but this is the common trap writers fall into by giving a shit about what others think and want from Their work (which btw I fully believe in writing what you want even if it's "bad" because something with genuine soul will never be as bad as soulless cashgrabs). romanceable characters can and should be as flawed as you'd make any other character, bc trust me there's an audience for everything. even a random npc with two lines will be attractive to someone.
the pressure of an imaginary audience is what pushes writers into a corner and prevents writers from writing and exploring what They want. it's the writer's story first, not the audience's. I think the romanceable companion trap can be easily avoided if writers just 1) grow a bit of a backbone and 2) ask themselves if this is even a necessary or insightful mechanic that will help develop a character further. ask themselves if this character even has the capacity to handle a romantic relationship bc everything else is subjective and it's impossible to appeal to everyone (which apparently this is a controversial take). I won't sit here and pretend that I don't appreciate a good romance, but sometimes all someone really needs is a friend.
obsidian is a good example of self aware devs. they tried to do romance for pillars of eternity 2 bc of fan demand, and it didn't work very well. now for avowed, they didn't explore romance bc they know it's not their strong suit and don't feel it's necessary for this story, instead that time and effort went to developing the characters in other meaningful ways. I have nothing but respect for such a decision bc they know what they want from their story instead of lying and trying to be everything at once. less is more as they say.
#this was supposed to be a small post but . yk how it is#wrote this instead of working on my stupid art projects i am about to walk into the woods and never return i hate college#anyway. enjoy my rambling there's a point in there somewhere probably#nothing against the dev who said that btw i thought it was interesting for them to say since it is true#its hard to not think about the potential audience when creating something but we have to try to ignore them#i think i wanted to say more but whatever this generally covers my thoughts#and i know everything is subjective maybe people Do want their romanceable characters to be attractive and unproblematic#good for you. there's genres for that. but in a dark fantasy setting? some things just don't work like that. genres exist for a reason#i want my companions to be messy mfs not pretty perfect angels#also☝️dont be stupid i don't condone writers having personal agendas and writing hateful things#thats a completely different thing and obviously not what i meant#a writer should always be a neutral observer of their work. nothing else.#bioware critical#six speaks#oh also again... nothing wrong with um 'normal' and kind characters. but when everyone is like that it gets boring. variety ok
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.
#kinda hate that i haven't written anything in like. over a month#but also trying to be better about not forcing myself to write when i don't feel like it#not in like a “i only write when i have inspiration” kind of way but like “this is something i do for fun on the internet” kind of way#like this is a hobby for me i don't want to burn myself out on it#which lowkey i think is what happened with my tour writing project although i also think it was good for me too#anyway i have a few ideas floating around and wips i want to get back to now that the season is winding down#something that i've been tossing around for a while and that i want to write but i also want to take my time with it#so i'm sort of tentatively setting jonas's birthday as a goal for it but saying nothing else so when that doesn't happen it's not a big dea#i also have the loosest idea of a web weave that i want to do for his birthday too but um. we'll see on that one#anyway long rambly thoughts don't mind me#things are kind of crazy at work right now and i have some irl stuff coming up but after that. i want to focus more on writing
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hii do u have a sona i can draww? :D
Ayee as a matter of fact I do
Here’s my silly do what you will
#bandit's doodles#woahh weird I don’t have any hermits to tag#um uhh bandit fanart#my little shapeshifter guy#he’s so dear to me#and pathetic#I don’t have anything else to say#it feels weird not having a wall of tags under my art honestly#I can’t yap about myself there’s nothing to yap about#anyways I’m planning on changing my username so uh look out for that I guess#is it url idk#it’ll still be bandit just a better name to go with it#there that’s a good enough yap wall#bandit out
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if you can read this, im not vagueposting abt you. but its real fuckin weird how some people think their pet photos are healing to other people. your kitty and your puppy are lovely but sending me pictures of them are not magically making me feel better and its actually kind of weird that you think it would
#i like animals a lot! animals deserve nothing but care and respect!#fuck my allergies; if im at a party and there is a pet i am ditching every person to go hang out with the animal#but if i tell u i am sad and u go ah. here. this will cure you. 12 pictures of my dog. dont you feel better now?#no. its weird. thats weird#that is a photograph of someone elses animal and i have depression#'demeaning' isnt the right word and idk the word im looking for exactly but its like-#-idk theres something not quite insulting abt the like... assumption that this will make me better#this is SUCH a negative post im sorry lol i genuinely love seeing photos of my friends pets and hearing the stories and all#i love animals#its just. uncomfortable and. um. belittling? (still not the exact right word) to assume my struggles are healed by. some pixels of an anima#that i dont even have a relationship with#ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY i told an irl friend im having a bad time and they... spammed me with dog photos and went ah are u better now#no. im worse actually.
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jumpsuits were almost the ultimate outfit if they made them with the ability to pee in them without taking the whole thing off smh
#the girls look great today though is that tmi#mari says#when i get back from this wine fest will i have the energy to write ume?#and the grocery headcanons#and finish roadtrip…#and and and#definitely the groceries if nothing else
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reminder.
#hi i couldnt think of an awesome caption for all of this so um ill talk in the tags about my thought process#silhouette is forgetting herself. and she knows this. they reflect on this often. this time literally in a mirror. and their face...#its blurry. its obscured. they can see their own tired expression... but can they really see their face?#and the flames. once again burning away at their memories. sil can watch herself forget in real time if she wanted. she's so tired.#she could burn away everything if she wanted. they could keep burning until there's nothing left at all. and that self destructive tendency#is tempting. god it is so tempting to say fuck it and give up. but no they cant. they have a job to do. they usually remind themself to kee#going in the mirror. even when the reflection doesnt always look familiar. but now theres also something else. a new glimmer of hope in#silhouette's otherwise bleak life. a girl. she doesnt know if they can have that happy ending. but she will do anything to keep her safe.#and for now that is enough. sil doesnt know if she will remember her own face or her own name but my fucking god she will not forget lucy's#anyway hi im normal about my ocs 😁 teehee#my art#doodle#digital art#colored sketch#oc tag#silhouette#lucille
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