#unfortunately we still talk and think in the same way and we understand each other way too well

[astranauticus]

ok i like rushed through the whole orv webtoon way too fast so now i have thoughts going in like 5 different directions but ep121-123 drive me so fucking insane actually. every time i think about those two conversations i have to sit down

[astonmartingf]

CHASE ; MV1

max verstappen x streamer!reader

. . . you find yourself in a predicament between max's request and your conscience, so you ask charles for help in your game of chase with max verstappen

amgf mention of dnf and written portion in at the end. i am capitalizing on the ausgp, which is the same for wyh hahaha

previous: what if we met?

next: call me max verstappen

This was the first race you watched live in a long time. Charles tried to invite you multiple times, the last time you watched was during his debut back in 2018.

You could barely remember the difference then and now, sitting in the Ferrari garage with other members of the team you situate yourself in the corner, not really knowing what to do.

It was more chaotic than you remember, seeing Max especially going to the pit lane, his wheel burning, leaving a trail of smoke for every garage to see. It alarmed you a little bit, but hearing his voice through the radio, calmed you down.

You meet his gaze as he walks by the Ferrari garage, probably on the way back to their motorhome, or the media pen. Charles gave you a tour of the track at the start of the weekend, but you still find yourself getting lost in the middle of Albert Park.

You flash him a small smile, followed by a wave which he returned. He must be not in the mood to talk, knowing the situation that happened, it caused them the gap to tighten between drivers.

As Charles' friend it definitely filled you with hope knowing that he might have a chance to pull some points to get ahead of the championship ranks.

But as someone who recently knew more about Max, it was definitely an unfortunate moment for him. You watch the screen as they interview Max regarding what happened with his car.

You stare at the screen, fully realizing then that this is the first time you two met outside the shared video games you played together.

As much as you tried to keep your cool alongside Charles' insistent teasing, you admit that you're nervous forming a conversation with him.

Just like after the second practice session, they planned to eat dinner together. Obviously you came with Charles, but what you didn't expect was for Max to be there as well. And safe to say it wasn't the same as your conversations online.

You remember Charles recalling your conversation with him word for word the whole night, teasing your awkwardness.

And in his words, he thinks, "it's cute that you're both awkward together, like two little nerds catching feelings for each other"

How appalling. And the day before the race when you bumped into Max, who happily helped you on your way back to the Ferrari motorhome. Which led to even more incessant teasing from Charles, you don't understand how Max keeps his cool whenever Charles keeps making fun not just of you but of him as well.

Maybe he's more used to Charles, they did race each other for a long time. But that's a story for another time, it's the first time you saw both of them and it seems like the fans are right when they say they sense chemistry between those two.

Your phone pings, receiving a message from Max.

Max the Builder: You want to go out on a little walk for a while?

YN: Where are you?

Max the Builder: I'll meet you at the back of the Ferrari garage.

You look around, everyone's eyes are glued to the screen watching Carlos and Charles closely. Glancing back and forth to the screens on the garage and your phone, you make your way behind the exit, where Max stood waiting for you.

"Have you been waiting for a while?" You watch Max jump, catching him off guard as he whips his head in your direction.

"I just got out of interviews, I'm free for the rest of the race. Want to spend it with me?" There he goes again asking you those questions, you know he speaks out of malice, but his genuine expression makes it hard to say no to him.

Before you could reply, you feel that Max has sensed your hesitance, thinking where he got things wrong again, immediately cutting off your reply. "But if you want to watch Charles we can do that as well. Or you just don't want to hang out with me?"

A soft gasp left your lips, quickly shaking your head left and right, "Max, you know that's not true. But I guess you could say I was avoiding you for the last day..."

Max tilts his head before nodding slowly, trying to hide the evident disappointment in his face, "So that wasn't me just overthinking it... You were purposefully avoiding me?"

"Not like that Max, I guess I was just overthinking as well. We've only talked online until now. I guess I got intimidated seeing you in real life, because we're not on Minecraft? Maybe I just got used to that, hence I kept avoiding you."

Max thinks in silence before raising his finger, "If you're uncomfortable talking at the moment we can play Minecraft and talk there?"

His suggestion catches you off guard, "What? No, we don't have to play Minecraft just to talk silly. That is a good idea Max, but I think we just need more conversations outside discord. My name is YN LN, nice to meet you." Extending your hand in front of him, which he happily shook back.

"Hello YN, I am Max Verstappen. I guess now I won't have to chase after you yeah?"

You laugh, shaking your head disagreeing, "You can't just tease me immediately Max, then I'll have to run away again."

Max shrugs putting his hands in his pocket, feeling more comfortable and finding the flow in your conversations, just like you did back on Discord.

"Well, run all you want, I'll have to let you know— I'm known for being fast."

You nod your head playing along, it's seems like the grooves have connected, like gears shifting in connection. "Well, your engine seems to disagree."

You watch Max' face freeze, "Too early?" your thoughts buzz around, thinking how you messed up the conversation in less than a minute.

A record breaking time.

But your worries halt hearing the sound of Max' laughing at your statement. "That's a good one YN, you're catching up quick."

This time it was your turn to shrug your shoulders, "What can I say, I learned from the best." bumping your shoulders into him.

You walk with Max as the race comes to a close, feeling confident and content as your friendship with him grows.

amgf i think there's one final chapter, the twitch stream hahahaha max is getting desperate but i would too

amgf ★ superstars: @namgification @lpab @the-untamed-soul @xjval

[strawberrysturniolo]

just tonight pt 2

summary: you and chris are forced to discuss moments of your past when the night before changes everything part 1

I woke up with the sun shining far too brightly through the partly closed curtains. The hotel room air conditioner hummed as a chill overtook the room. I tried to pull the covers over me, but I struggled, dead weight on top of them.

I turned over my shoulder, finding Chris, knocked out. His lips were parted slightly, the slightest snore leaving his mouth. I would normally find this annoying, but he looks so peaceful. His curls are messy, flopping across his forehead, some strands holding a tighter curl than others. I want to play with them while he sleeps like this. 

His body rises a little bit through every breath. I’m in a trance, watching his movements. I don’t realize how long I’ve been staring, but it’s long enough for him to feel my stare burning into him.

His eyes open slowly, barely, before he shuts them again, closing his mouth and humming. “Good morning.”

His low morning voice sends chills down my spine in the best way. I mumble, “Morning,” in response, the events of last night playing on repeat in my head. 

He gives me a soft smile before lifting his head weakly, making his fatigue known. He places it carefully in my neck, pressing a soft kiss to my jaw before I feel his eyes shut, his lashes fluttering against my cheek. 

I can’t stop myself from wondering if we made a mistake. It was just a kiss, and it doesn’t have to happen again. We don’t have to take it further. 

But right now I feel our hearts beating against each other and all I’m thinking about is how great it would be to wake up like this every day. 

We lay alone with our thoughts until Chris’ phone rings, a call from Nick. He sits up straight, his back on display as the duvet cover lays across his lap. 

“How fast can you get dressed?” Chris asks me, stepping out of the bed.

I do the same, assuming we’re in a rush. “I won’t take long, why?”

He digs around in his suitcase, pulling a graphic tee out and pulling it over himself. “Breakfast closes soon downstairs, and you’re in all my stuff. The boxers only make this look worse.”

I lower my gaze to my bottoms - a pair of his underwear. They hang lower on my hips due to my sleep, and Chris’ eyes can’t move them away. 

“Yeah,” I nod. “You’re right.”

The morning goes on with me and Chris back with Nick and Matt. Things have unfortunately gone back to exactly how they were before this trip. I’m not sure what I was expecting. I don’t know why I thought things would be different, but I would be a complete idiot to think that Chris would ever not treat me like shit. 

“I was looking around at places we could take pictures later today if you guys are down,” I suggest.

As Nick peeks over at my phone, a groan leaves Chris’ mouth. One full of disgust. Nick gives him a look and asks, “What’s your problem?”

“The less time I have to spend with her, the better,” he comments. “I’m miserable enough having to watch her while I eat, not to mention having to sleep in the same room.”

“Well, at least this way you can prove to Santa that you’re not a naughty guy after all and you can be moved to the nice list,” Matt teases, trying to break the tension at the table. 

I’m embarrassed at how my mood has been ruined because of Chris. Ten minutes ago he was curled in my arms, kissing my jaw softly, and now he won’t look at me. 

The worst part is, even when we’re alone in the car, or alone in public, he still won’t look at me. 

I can understand him trying to keep things ‘normal,’ whatever that means for us, in front of his brothers. But for him to completely ignore me and blow me off when we’re alone is uncalled for. We still have yet to talk about what happened last night, no matter how many times I have wanted to bring it up. The first step is getting his attention, but he has no intention of letting that happen. 

When the day ends and we all head to our rooms, I silently get myself ready for bed, ignoring him, just as he did to me. 

As I’m standing in the mirror removing my makeup, Chris comes up behind me, leaning against the wall as he watches me. 

“Can I help you?” I ask with a snappy tone, trying to set him off just as he was doing to me for hours today. 

He sinches his eyebrows together, like he can’t believe I would ask that. “Something wrong?”

I scoff. “You tell me.”

I finish up in the bathroom and walk back out to the bedroom. Without realizing what I’m doing, I scoop up my belongings, stuffing them into bags and hooking the straps on my arms. 

His eyes go wide as he races over to me. “What are you doing?”

“Getting another room.”

“No,” he stops me, or tries to at least. He makes an attempt to pull the bag off my arms, but I yank it back.

“Get off of me.”

“What are you doing?” he asks again. 

“I’m not staying in here with you,” I say simply. 

“Why not?”

“You know why!” I shout. I have this feeling in my throat like I’m going to crumble any second. I feel betrayed, taken advantage of, used. I feel awful. Why is he doing this to me? 

“I’m sorry,” he says, doe eyed. “Please, stay here with me. We can talk, we can kiss again or–”

“No, Chris!”

He takes a step back, defeat lingering around him. “I don’t know what I did,” he says softly. 

I head towards the door. “Then you’re a fucking idiot.”

“Do you think I want to act that way in front of everyone?” he fights back. “Do you know how long I’ve wanted things to be different? I’ve thought every day about how we could change things. I would change things if you’d let me, but I was never what you wanted. You pushed me away time and time again, and the only way for me to get over you was maintaining what we did have. We had a light hearted, teasing relationship, and whenever I threw something back at you, you threw it back with ten times more baggage.”

“So this is my fault?” I challenge his claims. “You’re using that excuse to let yourself believe that ignoring me all day as if you weren’t in my arms this morning was justified?”

“Please,” he mumbles. “Put your bags down.”

He looks at me like he’s on the verge of exploding. Like the dam is seconds from breaking. Like he needs me.

I toss my shit on the floor and stand in front of him, waiting. 

“None of this is your fault,” he promises. “None of it. I shouldn’t have treated you like this today, but after last night, I didn’t know how to be around you and them and act like I wasn’t daydreaming about you laying with me all night. I kept picturing you in my lap, kissing me. I wanted it all day. I wanted you. Every time I think I have you, you’re gone.”

I’ve never left him. His brothers are my best friends. Even when Chris is a dickhead, I still love him. I would never want anything but good things for him. 

“I would never leave you guys, Chris.”

He shakes his head. “That’s not what I mean.”

“Chris, we used to be closer than anyone,” I remind him. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t know how to be your friend anymore in the way we were. You won’t let me be that for you anymore.”

“I do,” he insists. “Please, just hear me out. Don’t go anywhere.”

I let out a sigh at his desperation. Before I know it, he’s leading me to the bed.

“Prom senior year,” he starts. “Your date didn’t show up.”

He promised he wouldn’t mention that again.

“Chris–”

“It was Nate’s idea,” he interrupts me. “He told me to step in, and I finally had the balls to. I was running down the street to the store in a fucking tux. I ran in and got you flowers, and when I came back you were gone. Everyone was gone.”

My heart drops. No one ever told me why he was late to prom that day. No one told me he was making an effort for me. Everything would have been different. 

“You were gonna take me to prom?”

He swallows harshly as he nods, like he’s partly embarrassed for letting me know he failed, but that he’s proud of himself for trying.

“A few weeks later you came running into my room with the biggest smile on your face. You pulled my headset off while I was playing a game and made me guess why you were so giddy. I couldn’t guess, and you told me he asked you to be his girlfriend. The same guy that made you cry because he stood you up at prom, you were now his girlfriend. I felt like fucking shit. I tried to clean up the mess he made that night, and when I failed, he still won you? How was that fair?” he asks me. 

I don’t have any answers for him. 

“Then you spent the whole relationship telling me how awful he was,” he reminds me. “I was obviously going to be there for you if you needed me, but any time we were together, I had to pretend like I wasn’t interested. I had to try to respect your relationship with him, even though I hated him for making you miserable. I hated watching your smile fade and I hated that it was because of him. I did everything I could to cheer you up, and it worked, you know it did, but when you guys broke up, I thought it was my chance. You had no interest in me. It was so obvious. I just lost any hope of there being a chance with us, and the only way for me to get over that was to push you away.”

His words pour out of his mouth in a deep confession. Memories of us come flooding back into me like it was yesterday. Every look he gave me, every touch, every word shared.It’s all there. 

I can’t help but hate my ex even more for keeping Chris from me. 

I’m not mad at Chris anymore, but the frustration coursing through my veins masks my confusion for anger. And I aim it at the wrong person.

“Why didn’t you tell me?!”

“I thought you knew!” he shouts. 

We both stand in silence, staring at each other as our chests heave, trying to regain our composure. 

I shake my head, completely in shock at his confession. I used to cry to Nick, wondering why his brother was so mean to me after everything we shared together. He went from being the most important person to me to someone I barely knew. 

I feel like an idiot for wasting so much time trying to hate him when in reality he was trying to protect me from anything bad in the world. 

He couldn’t help it that he couldn’t catch up.

My face presses to Chris’ chest. I don’t know the moment I flung my arms around him and refused to let go, but the feeling of his heart beating against me brings me peace again, just like it did this morning in bed. 

“I called the hotel,” he says. “I changed the reservation.”

I pull back from his chest, staring up at him.

“If that makes you uncomfortable, and you want to go stay with Nick, I completely understand,” he says. “I didn’t think we were going to kiss. I wasn’t planning on making any moves. I just wanted us to be friends again. I wanted you back in my life in the right way.”

My hands hold his cheeks as my lips desperately search for his. His arms wrap around my back, holding me as close as possible. The kiss is rough, both of us trying to gain dominance. I pull back from him to catch my breath, staring at his glossy eyes. The guilt is written on his face. The secrets he held from me for years. 

“You could never lose me, Chris,” I assure him.

He rolls his lips into his mouth before licking his lips, basking in the taste of us. He nods, but it’s clear he doesn’t believe me. Fear takes over him before any sense of hope can. 

“We’re going to be okay, I promise.”

It was his idea to sit in bed and watch cartoons, and we did just that for the rest of the night. It was my idea to order room service. We laughed in that bed, sharing innocent kisses that were stolen from us over the years. I wasn’t going to let anyone or anything take that from us again.

“Chris?”

“Hmm?” he hums in response, his fingers tracing over my back where it had snaked up his shirt that was hugging my skin, just as it was the night before. 

“We won’t ever be just friends.”

He pauses for a moment before he responds.

“Good.” 

tag list: @secret-sturniolo @chrisloyalgf @strnilo @draculaura123 @jellybeanbby @bridgetteauria @qwertytit @55sturn @sleepysturnss @creamoncreamoncream2 @sturnvvz @zoieisabella @swaggygirlboss123 @angelworldspost @patscorner @ducksturniolo @mattitties @luv4kozume @mbbsgf @freshloveforthefit @ripmattitude @gamermattsgf @strniololoverr @urmom2bitch @sturnitup @luvmila444 @st7rnioioss @sturniolosreads @1201pm @pepsiskiess @alorsxsturn @sturniolopepsi @sturnsgasoline @sturns-posts @sstvrnioloo @strawberrymilk4k @ratatioulle @kiibichio @nickmillersn1gf @milesfordays11 @l9vesick @mattsturnzzz09 @mattnchrisworld

[woozihaes]

pairing: s.coups x f!reader warning: smut. and a lot of affection. (unfortunately) sexism. bitter women. notes: i read the great war by @amourcheol and i will never be the same. heavily inspired by that universe. also, for this fic, let's pretend reader has never given cheol a blowjob.

-

love & service

-

you remember why you hated going to these things.

"look at them," one of the wives sneered, watching the soldiers drink with cherry cheeks. "they drink to their hearts' content while we take care of the aftermath in the morning."

one of the disadvantages to getting married is staying with the wives during any and all gatherings involving the men. they tended to be bitter, living proof that misery loved company, and it seemed like every wife in the room hated the fact that they were married to a soldier.

what's worse is that they could not stop talking about it.

you push back a sigh and scan the crowd of men to find the familiar profile of your husband, set aglow by the fire, scar a flash of white against his skin.

"i bet the victor of venice is the worst one," the lady beside you said, and you turn back to her. her eyes seemed to implore you to join the gossip, to fall into their conversation of seemingly hating their husbands. "i bet he simply expects you to kneel and service him with his mouth. an ego as big as his is surely the most insufferable. or does his eye wander now that you've been conquered?"

your stomach drops, but keep your face neutral. you clear your throat and smiled dryly. "we've been married not long yet, so i haven't witnessed anything."

the lady's face soured, and she looked away, choosing to gossip with someone else.

you suppress your sigh and stand, excusing yourself. you'd rather sit alone outside than stay here.

-

you lean against a post of your shared bed, fingers play with the end of the string holding your dress together as you replay the woman's words in your head.

i bet he simply expects you to kneel and service him with his mouth. an ego as big as his is surely the most insufferable.

"you seem far away," you hear, and you turn your head to find seungcheol's eyes staring at you, sparkling with interest. he'd had some to drink, but not much—you'd asked before and he'd shrugged, calling it a soldier's instinct—so his cheeks are rosy.

"sorry," you mumble.

he walks over to you kisses your cheek. "it's quite alright," he says, gently taking the string from your hands. "may i?"

you nod absently as he loosens your dress, gently tugging away the fabric and pressing a soft kiss to your shoulder. he's become more affectionate as of late, which is never unwelcome, but your curiosities make themselves known once again.

"cheol," you mumble, and he kisses his way up your neck.

"mm?"

"i have a question."

he kisses the spot beneath your ear. "ask away."

you take a deep breath. "more of a request, really."

his kisses against your skin are soft and unrelenting. "mmhmm."

"i don't..."

"you don't what?" he murmurs against your jaw, voice breathy.

you try not to get distracted. "i don't want to go to those things anymore."

the kisses stop, and your husband pulls back. his face is crumpled in concern. "why? what happened?"

"they're... i don't like being with them. they... they're..." you shake your head. "i just don't like it."

"did they do anything to you?" cheol asks, inspecting your person for any injury.

you sigh and pull away. "no, cheol, i—"

"no, no," he says, grasping your elbow and keeping you still. "i don't understand. what do you mean?"

"it's okay, i can just—"

"it's not," he insist. "tell me about it."

you press your lips together. "they're very..." you exhale. "unhappy. in their marriages."

seungcheol seems to mull this over. "okay. and?"

you decide to tell him outright. "i think they expect me to be, too."

his eyes flit to yours. "what do you mean?"

"their questions... they all understand each other. and every time i see them, they ask if you've tired of me."

he bristles at that. "what? they ask you that?”

"among other things," you mumble.

"what other things?"

you flush. "nothing."

"it's not nothing, carrissima. tell me." his gaze softens. "you know i don't like it when you keep things from me."

damn it, you think to yourself. you try not to shirk away in embarrassment. "you... you have never asked me to pleasure you."

"you pleasure me," he corrects, picking up the task of tugging down your dress. once he succeeds, he starts on the arduous task of untying your corset.

"the wives always say their husbands... demand that they service their cocks, with—with their mouths," you say, trying your best not to shy away from the topic. "i have never used my mouth. you've never asked that of me."

his fingers pause on your back for a fraction of a second before proceeding. "do you want to?"

you flush this time. "i don't know!"

"then you don't have to," he states plainly. he manages to get your corset off, and his fingertips brush against the last scrap of fabric protecting your skin from the cold air. "i would never force you to do something you're uncomfortable with."

you sigh despairingly. "you confuse me, seungcheol."

he smirks and turns away to take off his own clothes, and your eyes watch him slowly peel away the layers of his garb, until your eyes land on broad shoulders and strong arms. he pauses in untying his pants and turns to you, eyes burning. "what else have you heard from the wives?"

"what?"

he repeats himself. "what else have you heard?"

"that the victor of venice is probably the most infurating man of them all."

he scowls. "i'm being serious."

"so am i!" you counter. "they really said that."

"okay, then, what else did they say about me?'

you chew on your bottom lip. "that you will tire of me."

the confused look on seungcheol is absolutely adorable, but you know this isn't the time to point it out. "tire?"

you nod, a little sad. "now that you've... conquered me." your face sours, and so does his.

"that's ridiculous." the corner of his mouth tugs down and he steps closer, gently taking your hand. he brings your palm to his mouth and kisses it. "did you agree with them?"

you shook your head. "i never answer. i try my best to leave."

"which is why you want to avoid these gatherings."

you nod.

he sighs in understanding. "alright. i don't want to force you to do something you don't want to do."

"thank you," you breathe, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to his mouth. "i love you."

"i love you, too." his smile grows. "but i suppose more than that you found it hard to voice to a room full of bitter shrews that your husband has no qualms about his knees and fucking you with his tongue."

your cheeks start to burn. how'd he turn the mood around so fast?

"that would make them very jealous, wouldn't they?" he murmurs against your palm. "that only you can bring the victor of venice to his knees." he kisses up your arm, lips pressing to your wrist, forearm, shoulder, neck. his breath is warm on your face. "in case i need to make it clear, i like being on my knees for you."

"cheol," you scold.

he ignores you. "i like pleasuring you," he says, muttering the words so lowly they make your body thrum. "i get to fuck you, in the end. i'd say it's fair."

"but—" you cut yourself off.

cheol pulls back and raises an eyebrow. "but?"

your heart races beneath your chest. you gently pull your hand from his grasp and trail it down his body, past his war-hardened body to the front of his pants. you gently tug the string and it loosens beneath your hands, and you see the top of his thick cock.

as if mesmerized, you sink down to your knees and tug his bottoms down. you feel seungcheol's fingers gently card through your hair as his cock comes free, not yet hard but definitely stirring. your eyes dart up and the anticipation is plain as day on his face.

you gently take his cock in one hand. "i don't know what i'm doing," you confess.

"stroke, my love," he implores you. "gently."

you follow his instruction. "how's that?"

"you're doing great," your husband says, rubbing his fingers tips into your scalp. your eyes slide closed at the feeling of his hands. almost on instinct, your hands adapt to the rhythm of his fingers, slowly bringing his cock to life.

you gently feel the tip off his cock brush the side of your nose and your eyes open. he's very hard beneath your hands, and you look up. cheol watches you, lovingly amused.

your eyes dart back down. "sorry."

he lets out a soft chuckle. "no need to apologize."

you pull your focus back to stroking him, and it doesn't take long for him to grunt.

"are you okay?" you ask.

he laughs again, but this time it just sounds like an exhale. "sorry. i'm—" he inhales sharply. "i'm getting impatient."

you continue to stroke him, and he groans. "how come?"

"because—" he chokes, and cuts himself off. his head tips back, and the veins in his neck stick out. his erection is now full fledged.

"look at me," you implore him, stroking firmer.

"i can't," he bites out, voice a little muffled.

"you did earlier."

"yeah, well, now i can't."

"why not?"

his breathing is ragged. "because—ah—i might fucking cum."

your chest swells with pride and love, sweet and heavy and sticky all at once. "i see." your pull back on the firmness of your strokes until his breathing evens out a little bit, and you lick the tip of his cock experimentally.

"fuck!" cheol cries, pulling his hands away from your hair. they tangle a little and he yanks at knots on accident, and you try not to yelp. "fuck, i'm sorry—" he says, petting your head, and you just decide to bite the bullet take the tip of his cock into your mouth and suck softly.

"jesus!" cheol nearly punches out one of the bed posts.

you pull away with a soft pop. "you can sit down, cheol."

he nearly collapses unto the foot of the bed, and you try not to laugh as you crawl closer.

his eyes are burning as he takes you in, resting on your knees. his knuckles brush over your cheek. "i can't believe you're doing this for me."

"i'm just returning the favor," you say, looking to the side. for some reason, you're unable to meet his gaze. instead, you grasp his cock again and slip it into your mouth, gently licking and sucking on the head.

"fuck," cheol groans from above you. "jesus christ, don't stop."

you don't. you go further, just a little bit, trying to take a little bit more of him as you go. you can only take half of his length in your mouth, but with the way cheol is grasping the sheets of your shared bed, it seems like it was more than enough. you compensate by gently using your hands on the remainder of his cock.

it doesn't take long for cheol to be pushing you away by your shoulders and pulling you up by your arm, twisting your positions until your back is pressed against the bed. he hovers above you, eyes scrunched in what looks like agony.

"are you okay?" you ask him.

"yes," he chokes out, "just—just trying not to... not to..." he drops his forehead to rest against your cheek. "shit, i—i didn't think that it would... that i would..."

"cheol?" you ask, and it's like something in him snaps. he presses his lips against yours in a dizzying kiss, grabbing the backs of your thighs and prying you open. when you pull apart, you yank your underdress and shuck it over your head, cheol taking it with one hand and flinging it to some corner of the room. he kisses you again, fingers finding your soaking heat (when did you get so wet?), and you cry out into his mouth.

"i need to be inside you, right now," he says desperately, eyes squinting in concentration.

"fuck me," you mewl, and he pulls his hand away before sheathing himself inside of you.

you cry out at the roughness of the way he fucks into you. he'd always been (perfectly) rough, but it feels like his soul is clawing into yours, each thrust a desperate attempt to tear at the edges of your sanity. your hips are loud as he slams into you, rutting wildly against you.

"fuck, i'm not gonna last," he says, pushing himself off the bed and widening his knees. his hand finds purchase on your waist and the other grabs the back of your knee to open you wider, and you're delirious with desire. "grab something, my love."

it's not much of a warning because he starts thrusting before you can even process what he says, and you scramble to find purchase on the sheets and on your breast. you nearly shriek at the full on assault he's delivering to your body, the feeling intense and divine and delicious. your eyes nearly roll back in pleasure, and you find yourself rapidly approaching the point of no return.

cheol curses and lets go, leaning forward to press his elbows over your shoulders so you don't slide up and away, keeping you in place so you feel the mouthwatering impact of every brute thrust. the open mouth kisses he presses to your mouth are hot and wet, and you feel a thin string of drool escape the side of your mouth. he pulls away and presses his forehead to the side of your head, his hair sticking to your skin.

the rhythm of seungcheol's hips start to fluctuate and one of his hands dart to your clit. it only takes a few rubs for you to unravel.

your legs start to twitch and your back arches, your breasts pressing against his sweaty chest. your pleasure is further heightened when cheol roars, rough and broken and hot against your ear, and the heat he let burst inside you triggers your body to shake uncontrollably for one final, blissful orgasm.

cheol collapses on top of you and you groan. "cheol," you whine, out of breath, "get off. you're heavy."

he grunts and rolls over to the side, but not before pulling you close and tangling your legs together. you're pressed flush against his chest, and it's sticky and gross but also immensely satisfying.

his breathing his deep and hard beneath your cheek. "that was amazing," he breathes, kissing your forehead.

you nod slowly, tired. "mmhmm."

he squeezes you a little. "i hope you know," he breathes, "now that i had a taste of that, it'll be something i'll ask from time to time."

you nuzzle closer. "i don't mind," you confess. "i enjoyed it. not as bad as the wives made me believe."

"that's good," he laughs breathily, "and just so you know, i don't think i'll ever tire of that. or of you." as an afterthought, he adds, "you may tell the wives that."

you giggle and search for his hand. you thread your fingers together. "if i tell them that i'm lucky that the man i married loves me," you say softly, "they might hate me."

"who cares?" he kisses your hair and pulls you close. "i love you."

your heart swells with love and you lean up to kiss him.

(and if you do more than that, well, just don't tell the wives.)

[totaly-obsessed]

Questions

Mary Earps x reader request

-> Mary gets jealous of the Reader for getting all the glory after an outstanding game -> requested by @michellelawrence222 under a different story - I hope you like it!

-> Cursing

a/n: I'll try to catch up with requests next week - Uni is killing me rn.

➳ Masterlist

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Playing on the same team as Mary, your fiancé, was the best scenario there was for you. Not only could you play with your partner – but your job was your childhood hobby. Your life was a literal dream.

And so was Mary – she was your dream, your future.

She always paid attention to you, valued you and your opinions, and helped you find your voice and ultimately yourself. She was an angel sent from heaven – a much-needed sign of peace for you and your chaotic life when you had met her all those years ago.

But a side not many people got to see from your girlfriend was her jealous one. The goalkeeper was usually the calm and organized one in your relationship, but when someone got just a little too close to you? All thoughts went out the window.

You found it quite cute. Yourself not ever able to imagine yourself with anyone else than her, not even able to pay attention or able to think of anyone else than her. But Mary, sweet Mary tended to get jealous or as she liked to call it ‘protective’.

It wasn’t intense or overbearing. She didn’t make you change clothes or stay home or any of that cliché stuff you see in the movies. Mary just liked to know that you were hers and that she was yours.

Whenever she got jealous her cheeks would turn red, her brows furrowed and her cheeks would puff up, desperately trying to calm herself down.

But that certain day was a little different, she was jealous of you, not someone who got too close to you. You.

As a striker who scored as often as possible, you were often in the spotlight – seen as a ‘savior of the club’ – while Mary was the unsung hero. She worked hard. Day and night to get better and to be the best goalkeeper in the WSL. But the recognition got lost somewhere you could not understand – your fiancés's biggest fan.

On that unfortunate day, you had scored two goals in the second half after Nikita Parris had scored in the first, while Mary had scraped every ball off her own goal line, making this one of the best games of the season for Manchester United.

Yet the applause for Mary’s efforts fell short, all eyes on you and Nikita. Your fiancé had enough. How come she did everything she could to keep the score zero on their side, but no one cared? If she had let all those shots on goal in, this would be a very different situation and she would have been heckled by fans and critics alike.

After the game you were on a winning high, like everyone else on your team – it was a great game. But Mary was scowling in a corner, not even looking at you. Meanwhile, every interviewer there wanted to speak to you and you did your best to talk to each and everyone.

Once you finally entered the dressing room it was mostly empty, aside from your fiancé who looked busy sorting through her bag. “Hey, baby. You did so well! I’ll shower real quick and then we can go, hmm?” You pressed a sweet kiss to her cheek, a little weirded out by her jerking her head in the other direction, and letting out a grunt.

The drive home was tense. You had hurried so much that your hair was still wet and you were missing your socks, trying not to make Mary wait any longer – you thought she was annoyed with you because you took so long doing the interviews.

Her left hand which usually found its home on your thigh was clutching the gear stick. The silence was swallowing you whole at this point – and it felt like shit.

At home she stomped into the bathroom, getting ready for bed. Meanwhile, you did your best to cook up a decent meal out of the stuff you had left in your cabinets – it eventually came down to a pasta dish.

But Mary didn’t make her way down, while you waited patiently on the couch, your partner's favorite show already lined up on the TV.

You had already called out for her, texted her, and knocked at the bathroom door – but she never made her way out to you. Tears brimmed your eyes as you sat the meal in silence in the harsh kitchen light. The usual setting of the couch made it clear that something was wrong – so you avoided it.

Maybe she just needed to wind down by herself, just some alone time?

But after three hours and falling asleep on the couch twice, you decided to head up to bed, packing Mary’s dinner portion into a Tupperware box in the fridge.

The bathroom door was now open and the lights were shut off. At least she had left the room.

The blonde was already in bed, a book in her cramping hands as she ignored your presence. “Mary?” She didn’t even look up. “I left your dinner in the fridge. Do you want me to heat it up for you? I can bring it up and you can eat in bed if you would like?”

She still eyed the book, aggressively turning the page which nearly teared under the force she had used.

It felt like walking on eggshells as you got ready for bed – leaving the bathroom door slightly open, scared that she would just vanish from the bed. The silence nearly drove you mad as Mary’s tense jaw shifted from one side to the other.

Eventually, you sat down on your side of the bed, feet still on the ground as you had your back to your fiancé. Your hands fidgeted nervously. Had you done something wrong? Why was she so mad at you?

“You really put in a shift tonight baby, you did so well.” The scoff that left the goalkeeper's mouth was immediate. You could not really understand why – she really did play great tonight and while she was her own harshest critic, she usually knew when she did well. “No, you really did! That dive you made-“

“Will you just shut up?” Oh. So, you really were the problem here – good to know.

You nearly wanted to vomit with how sick to your stomach you felt but if you being quiet made her happy, you would be quiet. Tears streamed down your cheeks as you slid off your slippers, finally getting into bed, your back still turned to the love of your life.

Mary however didn’t care – in fact, she rolled her eyes at you. “Do you want praise for shutting up as well?” Her voice was cutting and you nearly didn’t recognize her. Gone were her soft eyes and lingering touches, instead you could feel a hate-filled stare hit your back as you remained quiet – sobbing into a pillow.

“Give me a second and I’ll post it for you: ‘Star striker good at staying quiet – she deserves a fucking Oscar’ Maybe if you beg you will finally earn a trophy instead of praise.”

Who was this person in your bed?

“I don’t understand what’s happening Mary. How c-“ The blonde started laughing like a maniac. Maybe she was just tired from the game and the stress. “Of course, you don’t fucking see what is wrong! Too busy bathing in the glory while I do all the goddamn dirty work!”

Mary had gotten out of bed, pacing up and down the open floor, pulling at her hair while mumbling to herself. “What if I hadn’t been there, huh?” she was shouting now, angrily gesturing through the air “Who would have stopped them from coming? No matter how many goals ya would have scored, still would have lost without me.”

You flinched as your cold feet hit the ground but your cheeks were still hot in anger, the tears on them nearly evaporating. “Where are you going now?” Mary looked well and truly out of her mind, crying as well. “I’m gonna sleep on the couch. Maybe you should just go to sleep and calm down. Drink some water as well, huh? I love you – good night.”

Your voice was curt as you pressed a short kiss to her cheek, tasting the salt of mixed tears. But you left your fiancé no place to argue as you left the room while she could just stare after you.

The couch was comfortable enough to spend a night as you desperately hoped that she would just come to her senses overnight. It felt like someone had body-switched the woman you loved so much, for someone really mean.

But Mary couldn’t sleep, lying awake in your usually shared bed, clutching your pillow to her chest – what had gotten into her? How were you to blame for the people not recognizing her efforts and work? You were the first to congratulate her on everything, always making sure to mention her in post-match interviews.

If there was anyone at fault it certainly was not you.

Fuck.

You could hear her trudging down the stairs before you could see her, as she stood still behind the couch, nearly standing like a ghost in the kitchen. “You wanna say something?” The nervous gulp showed you that the goalkeeper didn’t expect you to still be awake.

“I’m sorry – I fucked up.”

A sigh so deep that it nearly knocked out the rest of the air in your lugs, left your lips as you sat up again – your head would surely kill you, as a headache already forming from all the crying. Mary sat down on the spot that you had cleared for her.

“Say it again, to my face and tell me what has gotten into you.”

Gone was the scared woman from the bedroom, you’ve had enough. If she wanted to behave like a child you would treat her like one. Mary took your hands into hers, shocked at how cold they were. Her eyes met yours in an ashamed gaze, looking up through her lashes.

“I am sorry for treating you the way I did. I was angry that you had gotten all the glory after the game – but that wasn’t your choice and I shouldn’t have come at you because of it.”

Even in the dark Livingroom, you could see the frustrated tears making their way down her cheeks, wetting your hand as she pressed a kiss to it.

“I accept your apology, Mary.” She could finally breathe, pulling you closer to her and giving you the first of many kisses.

“Pull something like that again and I will kill you.”

You would always be her number one fan, and maybe you just needed to show her that bit more, tell her after more games how well she did – talk about her in more interviews because no matter how frustrating life could be – she was the answer to all your questions.

[avernusreject]

Warning ya'll this is gonna be a long post. But please join my descent into insanity, as I deep dive into the vague wormhole that is the durge betrayal pre bg3 timeline.

Before we start, it’ll help if you have context around the faerun calendar. There are twelve months in total, each having exactly 30 days. Additionally, weeks don’t exist in faerun. Rather months get broken down into chunks of time called tendays, which you guessed is literally just ten days. If that was too straight forward for you, don’t worry, they add in five extra days to the calendar that fall outside of the months (ngl I still have no idea where these are located) to make the full year 365 days. 

At the beginning of the game, the nautiloid crash occurs at 20 Eleasis. Which means, the game starts in the middle of summer. Obviously, the way you play the game is going to influence the speed of events, but for my playthrough I reached moonrise towers around 12 elient (total time being 22 days). When you get to moonrise, in Bathazar’s chamber you can find his journal that explains that Kressa (the crazy necromancer chick) managed to keep durge alive. This entry is dated “two tenday ago”. But in game, that makes no sense because we know that the nautiloid should have crashed around that point. So either Balthazar doesn’t understand how the Faerun calendar works (I mean same, my guy) or we have to change our frame of reference. I think its more likely that the implied frame of reference is the start of the game, 20 Eleasis (since the developers can’t control how fast the player goes). 

If true, durge was saved by Kressa around 1 Eleasis. Her vivisections took place after this in the following days. However, durge is taken away before the end of the following tendays (at least before 10 Eleasis).

Now when you talk to Kressa in the basement of moonrise, she states that she found durge only hours after they had been given the tadpole.

In the fight with Orin, she states that when she attacked durge she carved out a hole for the worm (ignore the Half-Elf part, that's just from the moment Orin turns into durge during the pre-fight convo).

The part that we're missing is when specifically the tadpole was inserted into durge. But given how the game describes just how utterly fucked durge was, there's a high likelyhood that the tadpole was given to durge moments after their fight. Which if true, places Orin's betrayal at 1 Eleasis. Giving us twenty days till the start of the game.

The piece that threw me for a bit was this piece of the narrator's dialogue when durge examines the pod, stating that durge had no idea how much time had passed.

But the blood in the pod is still fresh enough that Astarion is able to ID it as durge & in another dialogue choice if you examine the blood further the narrator states the blood hasn't been there long enough to rot.

I think this dialogue is more explaining that durge is actively being tortured by Kressa so time feels unending (kressa being the one who put them in the pod to begin with).

I've seen in other posts that Gortash's draft memoir explains that Orin's betrayal occurred during or just around the crowning of the brain (I don't have a screenshot of that unfortunately). But we have to take that with a grain of salt because Gortash is the definition of an unreliable narrator.

Personally, I don't think he's lying though. Orin's betrayal occurred in moonrise and there's really no other reason that Orin and durge would be in moonrise that the game has provided. Not to mention, the warden explains the last time that durge was in moonrise, they never left.

I don't think durge came to moonrise more then once given the fact that the warden, who had clearly been there a while, had no clue who they were. I find it hard to believe their identity would be kept under wraps had they been at moonrise multiple times. Employees have to gossip about something.

I think its likely that Ketheric, Gortash, and Durge tamed the brain in the days leading up to 1 Eleasis (like ~20 to 30 Flamerule).

In summary, the dead three had a Phineas and Ferb summer vacation by deciding to create the cult of the absolute.

And yes if you are wondering this is how I look now.

[froggoon]

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She's my Angel: Meet the Family Pt.2 I Five Hargreeves x Reader

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Post Apocalypse Au! pt.1

WC: ~2,709

Warnings/Tags: fluff, Allusions to sex, Mentions of Abuse, Agedup!Five, Mentions of previous trauma

Summary: The Umbrella Academy saved the world, the Commission is no longer after them, the moon is in one piece and everyone’s lives start to fall back into place. Five attempts to start his life over again when Klaus brings home a girl with unusual shadow powers.

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Five and you had fallen into a comfortable rhythm that one would think the two of you had known each other for years. You started sleeping in the same bed together, getting ready together, eating together, and spending time together. Your routine had started to fall into place.

Somedays Five would ask you to show him your abilities. He was always astounded at how powerful you were. You could use shadows to teleport, physically manifest, store objects, and create weapons. To the regular person, or to anyone like his deceased father, these powers would intimidate them, scare them. But Five wasn’t scared of you,. Slowly you had become his Angel. Five found comfort in you, someone who would stick with him while his family scattered after his sacrifices.

“Come on Angel, I’m taking you out today.”

“Out?” You tilted your head.

“Yes like…a date” he blushed. He was wearing a white button-up shirt and black slacks, the shirt was pressed clean with no wrinkles, and the top 3 buttons were undone.

“Go put on your prettiest dress and some nice shoes.” He kissed the top of your head and watched you run off. Anyone who could see the two of you could see his adoration for you. You lived up to your nickname being a small beacon of light in his dark mind.

Despite your growing "relationship" Five still had his worries. It had been 2 weeks since he met you and he wasn’t any closer to finding who had taken you or figuring out your true identity. He had only know a few things from what you told him.

You had grown up in a lab isolated from everyone. The only way of understanding the outside world was through tv and books that a kind doctor had let you before he met an unfortunate end, not that you knew about that. He also learned about the environment you grew up in by your reactions. You hated loud noises, didn’t understand cultural norms, and feared violence and abuse. Knowing this, Five learned to adjust to your needs. He wanted to take care of you and help you. You had become his new family. Maybe it was obsession but it was feeling like love.

You came bouncing down the steps of the academy in a light blue dress with puffy sleeves and a soft ballerina like skirt. The neckline was square and above your cleavage was a gold heart necklace that Five had bought you on your last outing to the mall.

“Beautiful?” You looked at him and twirled.

“Very beautiful amore.” He kissed your cheek and led you out. As the two of you were about to leave the door opened revealing Viktor.

Viktor was in town having just gotten back from a trip to Italy and decided to stop by the academy.

“Oh Five! Who’s this? I came to check on you since you didn’t answer any of my calls.”

Oops well he wasn’t wrong. Five had ignored all Vitkors calls. It wasn’t out of spite it just felt like every-time he talked to his family he had to put on a front. He didn’t need therapy, didn’t want help, and was fine without them. But talking to them felt almost condescending and a very small part of him still harbored a grudge for them all leaving.

“Uh this is Angel. Klaus brought here and left her here so I’ve been taking care of her. We were just about to go out.”

“Angel!” You pointed to yourself.

“Viktor… Five’s family?”

Five sighed when he looked at you. So innocent , unaware to the trauma in his heart. “Yes this is my brother.”

“Brother.” You tested the word out loud.

“Brother!” You pointed to Five.

“No no not I’m not your brother.” Five shot down. He could see the tears in your eyes forming. “I’m sorry Angel, yes we are… family but I am not your brother okay? I’m your friend.”

Your eyes lit up at that notion. You were aware of what friendship was, there was a nice doctor in the facility who had befriended you and taught you all you knew about human interaction until… he met an unfortunate end, not that you knew about that though.

You jumped into Five wrapping your arms around his neck and burrowing your face in his shoulder.

Brown eyes made contact with green and Five felt uneasy in his brother's judgmental gaze. Before Viktor could get out another word Five blinked the two of you to the car. Standing in the doorway Viktor turned to look back at you guys. He was happy his brother had found someone, but you seemed off. He walked into the parlor and whipped out his phone to send a text to the family group chat. Viktor: Did you know Five got a girlfriend? He said Klaus brought her one day and left her. They just went out all dressed up. Allison: No way Diego: Finally that old timer can get some Lila: Who would let that little gremlin near them? Viktor: @Klaus how did you meet Angel. Klaus: On the street. Everyone mentally cringed at the thought of Klaus picking up a girl "off the street" Klaus: She ran into me and was in bad shape, She's super cute though! I knew she and little Five would get along, I'm going to go visit them tonight. Allison: I want to see her! Im coming too Diego: Me and Lila are coming too. Luther: I guess I'm coming as well. Viktor closed out his phone and began walking around the academy. It hadn't been too long since the world was almost destroyed but this place was riddled with mixed memories of sadness but also happiness in which he and his family had finally come together.

His eyes ran over the painting of Five above the mantle. Over his travels, he often thought about Five, but not at first. Initially, he was overjoyed with traveling, meeting people, and developing a few relationships, but his thoughts began to wander back to Five. The boy who had leaped across time, and had worked his ass off to get back to his family only for them to all leave again. It made him feel guilty every time he talked to Five over the phone only to get short responses. His thoughts went back to reminiscing. Five and Vitkor were closest when they were younger, Viktor even remembers the small crush he had on the boy as a kid. Five was cocky, arrogant, and thought to be better than everyone. But the way he looked at Angel had a softness that could rival a field of flowers. The fact he had let her touch him had given Viktor enough information to assume that you had helped Five for the better. ————————-On your date———————— Five had taken you first to a cute little dinner a bit out of the city. You two sat in a booth on the same side. He was a little confused when you sat next to him but decided against saying anything when you grabbed his hand under the table. The waiter came to take your orders, his name was Alek. He looked at you mostly with a predatory glint in his eyes. "What can I get for the pretty lady here?" He winked at you. You laughed and blushed before saying "Pasta!" Pasta was a favorite of yours. Five and you had made pasta together from scratch one night and it was one of your favorite moments with him. You remembered making the sauce together, him flicking some onto your face before kissing it off with his lips. He had looked so good kneading the dough and showing you how to make the sauce and noodles. It ended happily with you in his bed. Five also knew this was your favorite dish and why. It only made his heart beat for you more. Breaking the waiter's attention off you Five stood up and pushed Aleks chest back. "And I'll have the steak, rare I like it a little bloody, and bring us back a milkshake to share, strawberry." Five sat back while glaring at the waiter. Who did this guy even think he was anyway, he literally saw Five walk in with you. Before he could think anything else, his attention was pulled away when your hand traced his jaw.

"Prickly. Ouch." You ran your finger back and forth over his cheek. Five had been growing some facial hair recently.

"What princess? You don't like?" Five rubbed his face against yours while listening to the melodic laughter erupt from your lips. Alek came back with your meals and milkshake avoiding eye contact with you and Five. Excited for your food you kissed Five's cheek as a way to thank him. The two of you ate your food in comfortable silence and shared the milkshake, occasionally laughing when both of you reached for the straw at the same time.

————————-After your date————————

You and Five had left the dinner with full bellies and even fuller hearts. Hand in hand he led you to the street. "let's talk a walk, we need to digest all that food and I know a park nearby that you'll enjoy." "Okay!" you agreed. You had begun to trust Five with... everything in this short time. He cared for you and showed you how to cook, clean, and use a phone. You were growing to love him, not that you knew what love was. As the two of you came closer to the park your eyes lit up seeing the families and children running around and enjoying the warm summer day. Your expression made Five's heart beat faster. Your innocence and kindness were a nice contrast to his years of killings and suffering. Five led the two of you to a bench that looked out to the grassy playground. You leaned your head on his shoulder and let out a sign. You finally felt at peace. No electric chair, no pointy syringes, just the warmth of Five's hand in yours and the smell of his cologne. Five looked down at you staring out into the park. He felt lucky, how could someone like you just fall into his lap when he needed it most. A thought crossed his mind, what would happen if you remembered who you were, would you leave him? The last time he was in a relationship was with a mannequin. But this was different, you needed him just as much as he needed you. He pushed those thoughts aside when he watched your eyes close. He nudged your side "Come on Angel its been a long day lets get you home." Lazily you both stood up and walked back to the car not dare letting go of each others hands.

————————-At the Academy————————

Five was on high alert as the two of you arrived back at the Academy. The lights were on in the den and he could hear hushed voices as he approached. Opening the door he was met with 3 people, backs turned towards him. He instantly recognized these figures as his siblings, Diego, Luther, and Allison. Peaking around them he saw three more, Viktor, Klaus, and Lila. "Well, this is an unexpected visit," Five stated breaking the uncomfortable silence. The trio looked at each other before Allison spoke up. "We wanted to check up on you, we haven't heard from you in a while." She looked at you behind Five, "Is this uh your girlfriend?" Five's eyes narrowed at Viktor in the corner before sighing. "She's not my girlfriend, this is Angel, I've been taking care of her since Klaus brought her here."

"I'm not Five's friend." You looked up at him, tears forming in your eyes. "No, shit I'm sorry Angel, yes you are my friend you are more than my friend." His expression softened when you wrapped his arms around his neck once again to kiss his cheek. The rest of the superpowered bunch looked in awe. Their normally cocky and arrogant brother hadn't snapped at you or yelled at you. He was gentle and reassuring. Lila was the one to speak up next to Viktor "Wow the old man finally found someone." Ignoring Lila's statement Allison continued, "Wait Klaus brought her here?" Klaus surprisingly not sober, stood up. "Yeah she ran into me all banged up so I brought her to the one place I knew could fix her up. She's got powers like us!" The family turned to you and Five once more expecting you to demonstrate. Hesitating Five looked at you "Okay Angel, show them what we have been practicing." You nodded to Five before raising your hands. In an instant, shadows rose from the ground to the ceiling of the room, suffocating any light that had been previously there. Your hands swirled causing the shadows to form a vortex. You thew your fists down bringing the shadows to your side. One arm lifted up across your chest as you threw it to the opposite area, effectively slicing a potted plant in half. Your eyes glistened with pride as you looked to Five. "I did it!" You jumped into his open arms as Five twirled you around with joy. "I knew you could do it princess!" Luther who was silent in the beginning spoke up next. "So you just found her on the street and she has powers? We don't even know her she could be dangerous then! She could be Commission!" Being number one and the head of the family was difficult for Luther. He was always overprotective of his siblings and made hasty rash decisions believing that he knew what was best for everyone. But Five remembers what happened when Viktor was discovered to have powers and he was hell-bent on not repeating it again. Five paused before turning to you and blinking you upstairs. He had tucked you in and helped you into bed before kissing the corner of your lips. "Good night darling, let me talk to my family for a bit, and I'll join you okay?" "Okay Five, good night" And with one last glance at you he blinked back downstairs. "Trust me Luther I would know if she was commission or not, when she got here she could barely talk and didn't even know her own name!" "I've spent the last 2 weeks trying to figure out where she came from. All I know is that she was brought up in a lab that focused on human experimentation to try to recreate the original 43." "You can't...You honestly can't possibly imagine, the pain she has gone through. And let's not forget what happened the last time you tried to "help" a person who had just gained their powers." Five looked over at Viktor. Viktor couldn't help but look at his lap. "Five is right, let's give her a chance. She is obviously doing well under Five's care and he cares for her back." Five looked appreciative at Viktor although he was the one who originally ratted him and you to the family. "I know you guys haven't heard from me in a while, but trust me I'm doing fine. Let's... go out for breakfast tomorrow. I know a place that we all would like. Meet back here at 9am. I'm going to check on Angel and head to bed." And with that, he disappeared in a flash of blue. The Hagreeves siblings looked at each other in shock. Never had their brother been the first to reach out to spend time, it must be important to him. Diego walked towards and grabbed Lila's hand "Well I'm happy for the guy, it was about time he got some. See you all tomorrow." He waved to his siblings and headed out. The others slowly followed suit each one of them that night laid in bed thinking about the events that had transpired and mentally prepared for a family breakfast the next day.

⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆⋆｡‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆⋆｡‧˚

Author's note: I had actually finished this before Tumblr decided to not save anything and I lost half the story T-T I was really good too. I tried to rewrite it the best I could. Taglist: @groovydazephantom

[fatuismooches]

Babey Zandy not knowing fragile reader is so precious.

He hears all about this mysterious person that all of his older versions adore, but he has no clue what they are going on about. He tends to avoid the mystery person's room to avoid tripping on something, so he's never seen them. He's never heard their voice. What's so great about some sleeping grown up?

But then he sees them. The one time he's allowed to go into the room, he's instantly starstruck. He's reminded of the fairytale he'd read about a royal that was cursed to sleep for a thousand years, and he figures that this person was what that royal must have looked like.

A few of the segments chuckle at the reaction the child has. Wide eyes, slack jaw, it's cute. But then Zandy turns and asks,

"This is who we marry when we grow up? Did we finally do something good?"

The segments collectively think that no, they hadn't done anything good. Not enough to deserve their lover, anyway. But the sleeping beauty still chose to love them. That was more than enough for the blue haired maniacs.

MY HEART BRO... MY HEART. THIS IS SO PERFECT. AMAZING. CUTE. I LOVE IT SM.

Little Zandy tends to be left out of the loop quite often. It's due to various reasons - the older segments not wanting to have to deal with him, or having to take the time to explain, or perhaps the topic matter isn't very kid-friendly (considering the kind of work they do). So, the little one is used to finding out things after the fact, unfortunately. You happen to be one of these topics.

What really interests Zandy is how the segments say your name. The boy is used to hearing them speak about others in contempt (that damn Regrator, wicked Damslette) or with no regard/care at all (test subjects) but you? You don't get either of those. Rather, you get your name spoken with affection. Like how his parents spoke to each other (only that he wasn't afforded that same treatment). So naturally he's intrigued, but confused. You've been sleeping for so long! How could someone who's sleeping be interesting? You can't even talk! But it seems that the segments don't mind, although they are quite sad, they're willing to wait, which is strange. And Prime is willing to talk enough for the two of you. Zandy hears him from the room sometimes. Still, the boy fails to understand what sort of appeal you have. But he is a curious one, so he begs and begs to be able to see you. And when he does, well, everything makes sense.

You're just so pretty! Right of out a fairytale! He can't help but run up to you and hold your hand, in awe. And though normally the segments would scold him for "getting in their way" but they don't this time. Because even though the brat can be annoying his reaction is rather amusing. And they don't want to raise their voices in your presence.

I imagine, when you do finally wake up, he begs for you to read that story for him 😭💗 he definitely reads the voice for the prince that saves the sleeping royal (you) and beats up the bad guys (celestia) 🥺

THEM BEING THANKFUL FOR YOU LOVING THEM... sobs

[sunny44]

All these years (Part 5)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Ex girlfriend Reader

Warnings: none

Summary: Separated by a disagreement, Charles and Y/n meet again after years apart and all the feelings they had repressed come flooding back.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

"How was to see him again?" Carla asks curiously.

"I can't explain the feeling actually.”

"You still love him, don't you?"

"Loving or not, everything between us ended a long time ago."

"But he still loves you."

"That doesn't matter anymore, we've both moved on and we're very different people now."

"And more mature too, if you two just talked maybe you could understand each other."

"Carla, you have no idea what it's like to look at the person you loved the most in the world and the only thing you can feel is anguish, disgust, and disappointment. No matter how true my good feelings for him are, the bad ones always win in my mind." she continues, listening. "Every time I look at him, I remember him yelling at me and saying all those things. And believe me, it's not easy to forget."

"You should at least talk and come to an agreement because Pescale hates seeing you two fighting." she says, and I look at her. "You have no idea how upset she gets when she sees you two in the same room with those looks."

"What looks?"

"Yours wanting to kill him and his wanting to kiss you and never stop."

"Ok." I can only say that.

"Would it be a bad time to say that you're going to be his partner?"

"What? I thought Lorenzo would be my partner."

"He would, but he wanted to be with one of my cousins who he found attractive, so Lorenzo asked if it would be a problem to change at the last minute and I said it wouldn't be a problem, and that you would be Charles's partner."

"How does he always end up near me without even trying?"

"Because you're like magnets, you always find your way to each other."

"Idiot." she laughs, and we remain quiet as they finish the makeup.

They finished my hair, so I went to put on the dress. All the bridesmaids could choose the style they wanted, but in a certain shade of brown. I had mine made at a small tailor shop in Milan, which was simply perfect and very good.

"Get out of there so we can see the dress."

I left the dressing room and saw that all the other bridesmaids looked beautiful in their dresses, each one more beautiful than the other.

"Wow, you look beautiful," Charlotte who would be Lorenzo's partner, said.

"Thank you and you all look gorgeous too." I smiled at them. "But now it's time for the bride to put on her dress."

"Girls, I want you to see it later, so leave and find your respective partners."

I took one more look in the mirror to make sure I didn't have lipstick on my teeth and then left the room where we were. I soon saw Charles.

As always, there were women around him, so I walked over and made a throat-clearing noise to get their attention.

"We need to go, Leclerc."

"And who are you?"

"Unfortunately, I'm his partner."

"So you must be Y/n. I'm Gina," I agreed. "How did you let a man like this get away?"

"He's not as spectacular as he seems, believe me, he can be a real jerk when he wants."

I smoothed my dress and walked away, but I felt his arm around my waist and his large, warm hand on my stomach.

"You're full of compliments towards me."

"Sure." I said, and he laughed.

"Even now, you're as sarcastic as ever."

"If you don't like it, that's your problem."

"In fact, I love it." he whispered in my ear, and the hair on my neck stood on end. "How do I look?"

"Ugly, very ugly.” he laughed.

"Okay, now tell the truth."

"And what makes you think I'm not telling the truth?"

"Because I know exactly when you're lying.” I rolled my eyes. "So?"

"You look ridiculously beautiful, which makes me want to punch your perfect nose." He laughed, and I missed hearing the sound of his laughter.

"That’s better now. And you look beautiful as always.” He said sincerely.

"Thank you, but brown isn't really my color."

"You look good in anything." I smiled. "Even naked."

"Can't you stop being a idiot for even a second?"

"I need to win you back somehow."

"Then stop trying because it won't work; you'll just waste your time."

"I prefer to waste my time on you in other ways.” he looked at me with a mischievous grin.

Before I could respond, we heard the music, so we all lined up to enter the venue. Obviously, Charles and I were the first to enter, and one of the organizers arranged the sequence, and the door opened. I hooked my arm through Charles, and we began to walk down the aisle.

"The next time will be you walking down the aisle to marry me.” Irolled my eyes, and before I could respond, we had to separate, each to our respective places.

Arthur was already there, nervously fiddling with his fingers, indicating that he was completely nervous.

Soon the music began to play, and Carla looked beautiful there. Her dress was simple, without all those layers of tulle, but it was beautiful and elegant, giving her a charming air. I noticed that Arthur had tears in his eyes, which brought tears to my eyes as well. I saw Charles smiling as he watched her walk toward his brother, and for a few minutes, I got lost in his smile, but I quickly looked back at the bride.

During the part where the priest was talking, I was a bit absentminded, and Charles's glances at me didn't help. He smiled and winked at me, and all I wanted to do was punch his perfect nose, but I was holding back.

"Repeat after me. I, Arthur Leclerc, accept Carla Brocker as my lawful wife, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, and until death do us part," the priest said for him to repeat.

"I, Arthur Leclerc, accept Carla Brocker as my lawful wife, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, and until death do us part."

"Now, you, Carla, repeat after me. I, Carla Brocker, accept Arthur Leclerc as my lawful husband, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, and until death do us part."

"I, Carla Brocker, accept Arthur Leclerc as my lawful husband, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, and until death do us part."

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

Everyone sitting in the pews stood up to witness it, and, of course, there were loud cheers and celebrations for the new couple.

Bonus scene!

Yourusername Instagram stories

“Ready for the wedding of the century”

Tag list: @formulas-bitch @nuggetvirgo @lndonrris @cmleitora @janeholt3 @coffeewhore18 @blueflorals @agentadhd @eviethetheatrefreak @honethatty12 @lec-16 @ariamox @boherahpsody @ssararuffoni @leilani13gc @alldaysdreamer @minmira95 @dessxoxsworld @dessxoxsworld @vellicora @meadhbhcavanagh @viramila @lightdragonrayne @morenofilm @millinorrizz @leclercdream @buendiabebeta @ironmaiden1313 @julesandro @ssararuffoni @sialexia @notleclerc @glow-ish

[agneswarda]

golden girls is so amazing i even made a powerpoint

(I copy-pasted the main text under the cut. unfortunately, I can't find the time for a proper alt text. life is stressful rn)

-Picture it: Miami, late 80s/early 90s. four 60+ women

-living together.

-Sure, they talk a lot about (straight) sex

-but what we see on screen is their dynamic. Their deep friendship. Their love also they often act quite gay with eachother. amazing

-Did i mention they are old. They are old and deal with getting sick and aging. A lot.

-But their life isn‘t over. They might not be related. But they are family, and they are here for each other

-These four women are the Golden Girls.

-You are in for a treat. A 7 seasons 25 episodes long treat

Introducing the girls: Dorothy Zbornak

-not to be a lesbian but omg

-Tall soft butch

-quick-witted

-sarcastic

-her voice *swoons*

-would make numbers on tumblr

-> her idea of a good time is being Alone wiht a book in her room

-> Huge dorky nerd

- Being vulnerable is not her strength but when she is It‘s amazing. Soft. makes me cry

Introducing the girls: Blanche Devereaux

-slutty

-sexy

-selfish

-sensitive

-Sensual

-Did i mention slutty

-And proud of it

-All these things are her strenghts as well as her weaknesses

 -She is actually quite complex

Introducing the girls: Rose Nylund

-Sweet

-Loving

-Kind

-caring

-Everyone says she‘s Dumb

-I think she might just Be neurodivergent?!??!!!! With her special interest

-Being St. Olaf

-The place she comes from

-Has amazing st olaf stories for everything

-Can also be a judgy bitch sometimes

Introducing the girls: Sophia Petrillo

-SHE WOULD MAKE NUMBERS ON TUMBLR

-„You're a funny little gnome, and we feed you too much.”

-This quote describes her perfectly

-It’s Dorothy who says it to her

-Who is incidentally her daughter

-Trickster energy

-Don‘t know if she is gay. But she commits crimes

-It‘s her way of dealing with old age

-And all the limitations it brings

-The show would just be half as funny without her

But op. Is it really this good. It‘s so old

I will admit: not everything aged well. Be also prepared for:

-it‘s v white. If they have characters of color, they sometimes work well. And sometimes it‘s embarassing to watch bc harmful stereotypes (not often but yeah. It happens.)

-Bodyshaming: the girls tease each other about their height, weight etc. and sometimes it can really become a lot/too much.

-Rose is so often the butt of the joke for not understanding situations. I think a lot of neurodivergent folks can relate. And it can hurt to hear the same old mean comments again and again

BUT

-This is a series which was never afraid of complicated topics

-First and foremost: the queer advocacy and topics were and still are amazing. The found family of it all alone.

-Also: death,being sick, being disabled. Getting old. Not performing the gender The way one would like to (anymore) (so. yes. Dysphoria. In a way). The financial aspect of it all. These are important topics which are treated with humor (of course) but also with respect

-it‘s a kind show which has its heart in the right place

-And i mean

-4 old women who are „just“ friends living together, supporting eachother?

-That shit is still revolutionary in the year of our lord 2024

So give it a chance!!!!11!!!!!111

[haleyhunwritess]

hi haley love, i’m probably sending too many requests i’m so sorry i just feel like i’m being heard here and i feel seen. i’ve been having so many panic and anxiety attacks and i was wondering if you can write something where broken promises stucky help the reader get through it or honestly whoever you’d like. i love you and i hope you’re doing good 🥺

𝐁𝐚𝐝 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬

warning: anxiety/panic attack, mentions of anxious feelings, angst, fluff, dd/lg themes, soft!dark!stucky x little!reader

a/n: hi sweetheart, i'm so sorry you've been feeling that way love 🥺 but i hope you're doing a lot better now and you can always talk to me if you need help, my dms are always open my love <33 also i know you said broken promises but i think this could work as a general fic and for broken promises too, i hope you like it lovely <33 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

"Sweetheart I need you to put your coat on so that we can leave, we're already very behind on our schedule today. We still have to make dinner when we come home, I promised Steve we would try to cook tonight." Bucky rambled as he quickly slipped his boots on.

It had been kind of a hectic morning. Lots of errands to run, lots of things that needed to be done before a peaceful night in with Steve, who was coming back home after two weeks away.

However, when you woke up this morning, your head was pounding and it felt like heart was about to burst out of your chest. You were feeling uneasy as anxious thoughts were running through your head about everything and nothing at the same time. You didn't know why but sometimes you would have days like these where your anxiety got the best of you, and traumatic memories from your past felt like they occurred moments ago.

You needed a mental health day. There was no way you'd be able to handle a whole day of running errands with Bucky. Even getting out of bed this morning felt like an impossible task.

Of course if you told him how you were feeling, he'd be understanding, and he could help you feel better too. But you were in no mood to talk about your feelings.

It seems unfair but you were hoping Bucky would be able to just sense how you're feeling so you wouldn't have to vocalize how you felt. Normally Bucky would have noticed that you were feeling triggered, however, with it being a stressful and busy day, he was too busy trying to complete everything on his to-do list for today before Steve came home.

Unfortunately, with all these anxiety built up in your chest and how exhausted you were after helping Bucky clean the house, you were feeling more and more vulnerable. You felt so weak. So small. And Bucky had yet to notice.

For some reason, he assumed you were being difficult because of little things that happened throughout the day. First, you ran out of your favourite cereal for breakfast. Then, while you were picking up the dishes from the table, you spilled chocolate milk on one of your favourite sweaters.

There were some other small incidences but after each one Bucky assured you there is an easy fix, and that after today, things would be less chaotic.

Currently, he was trying to get you to slip your coat on but instead you just stood there in front of the front door, huffing with your arms crossed. Normally, Bucky would've laughed and called you adorable for trying to look intimidating but right now he was only getting annoyed since you were now an hour behind on your schedule.

"Baby please just listen to me, just this once. We can even have get my girl a new stuffie while we're out?" Bucky crouched down in front of you, trying to help you put your sneakers on. He could tell you were starting to feel kind of small, and he knew he might be able to bribe you with the promise of a stuffie.

Instead, you just shook your head and kicked him as he tried to put your sneakers on your feet for you. He groaned slightly in pain ad stood up immediately, all the patience having left his body at this point.

"Okay, put your shoes and your coat on right now, and meet me by the car in five minutes, understood?" He snapped. He was clearly very upset with your behaviour and he was not in the mood to deal with it right now.

You were frustrated and feeling even more little now, and you couldn't figure out what to do. All you knew was that you did not want to go out. You just wanted to stay home. Deciding to leave without saying a word, you picked up the sneakers and threw them at the front door before starting to walk away and towards the stairs. However, you didn't get very far as Bucky caught your arm and roughly picked you up in his strong arms. Judging from the expression on his face, he was certainly angry now if he wasn't before.

"What did I just tell you, huh? I'm not in the mood to deal with a brat today. When I put you down, you're going to pick up your sneakers and put them on before joining me outside by the car, is that clear?" He said sternly, while still trying not to lose his temper. Tears started to fill your eyes as soon as you heard his harsh tone towards you, and they almost fell as you noticed he nearly rolled his eyes at them, "Don't you dare with the tears, or I’ll give you something to cry about, doll."

After that, you couldn't help it anymore. Tears started rapidly streaming down your face as you sobbed uncontrollably in his arms. Bucky was shocked at first, he didn't realize you were this upset. He instantly began to apologize as he carried you over to the couch.

Whispering, sweet gentle words and apologizes while trying to calm you down was clearly not going to work this time. No matter how hard he tried to comfort you, you were inconsolable. You could feel your entire body shaking, and no matter how hard Bucky tried to calm you down, you just felt like your heart was on fire. It was getting more and more difficult to breathe. Moving your hand up to rub your chest gently, you tried to get yourself to slow down and work on your breathing. Bucky quickly caught on and carefully picked you up from his lap and put you down on the couch. He quickly got up, and sat down in front of the couch, kneeling in front of you.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. It's alright, baby. I've got you." He took your other hand in his, rubbing it gently while trying to get you to focus on him, "Just look at me, baby. I need you to look at me so I can help you, babygirl. I need you to focus on my breathing, okay? Do you think you can do that for me sweet girl?"

You looked at him for a second before carefully nodding, making him smile. He leaned up for a second to give you a quick kiss before settling back down and trying to help you again.

Focusing on Bucky, and trying to follow as him as he instructed you to take deep breaths with him. It seemed to be working, however, the anxious thoughts were still there. You didn't know how to tell Bucky though you knew he'd definitely wanna know what just happened.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," Bucky said, as if he just read your mind, "I mean if you want to talk about it then I'm here for you, but I don't want you to feel like you have to. I just wanna know whether or not you're okay, doll."

"I..." You looked away, feeling even more nervous than before. It felt like your body was screaming at you to tell him why you were acting this way and how you felt right now. But you just couldn't, "I just want to be alone for a bit. I don't want to go out, I know you need to get some errands done but I don't think I wanna come with."

"Fuck the errands. So what if we order in again? No big deal, who cares. I need to make sure that you're okay, I can't just leave you alone after that."

"But I'd rather be alone right now, I promise I'm alright." You muttered nervously.

"Sweetheart, are you feeling little at all? Do you think you need da-" Bucky tried pulling you onto his lap to hug you, but instead you pushed him away and interrupted him.

"I'm not. I wanna be left alone." You nearly snapped as you got off the couch. You didn't know why but you were feeling very angry all of a sudden. The anxiety was still there but the implication of being too weak, vulnerable, or small to handle this on your own was making you a little frustrated.

"Umm alright, sweetheart, if you're sure. I guess I'll see you in an hour then, doll?" Bucky got up from the couch awkwardly, scratching the back of his head as he felt slightly confused about what just happened. He knew it was a bad idea to leave you alone but he wanted to respect your decision and give you your space. He quickly left after that, and the second you heard him drive off in his car, you fell back on the couch and started crying once again.

You felt weaker than before and somehow the horrible feeling had reached your stomach making you feel a bit queasy. You couldn't help but wish that you hadn't asked Bucky to leave you alone. You wished that Steve was here too. You felt so small right now, you did not want to be alone. You curled up into a little ball on the couch and hoped that Bucky would be back soon.

After about ten more minutes of crying, you heard the front door open. You quickly looked up from the couch, hoping Bucky had decided to abandon his errands and come home to you instead. However, to your surprise, it seemed that Steve had come home a few hours early, He strolled into the living room towards you with a beaming smile on his face as he was excited to see his girl after being away for so long. Although, that smile disappeared pretty quickly when he noticed your tear-stained face.

"Oh no, pretty girl, what happened to you? Are you hurt?" Steve knelt down in front of you, looking at you with his concern-filled eyes. You quickly shook your head in reply, letting him know that you're not hurt. He could already tell that you were feeling little right now, and didn't seem to be up for much talking, "Bubba, where's Bucky? Why isn't he here with you right now?"

"He left...errands..." You mumbled, looking down at the ground, feeling guilty for practically kicking Bucky out of the house. You looked up at Steve and felt your guilt getting even worse when you noticed the shift in his demeanour. Watching him take his phone out of his pocket and angrily text someone.

"Baby come on, let's get you upstairs to bed for now, okay?" Steve said as he gently rubbed your back for a bit before getting up to you carry you upstairs in his arms. You heard his phone buzz in his pocket, and he stopped in his tracks to check and see what it was before continuing to walk upstiars again.

On the way to your room, you couldn't help but lean into Steve's touch making him smile slightly. He kissed the top of your head before gently putting you down on your bed.

You gulped, feeling guilty about receiving all these sweet attention from him while he clearly seemed mad at Bucky for leaving you alone when you told him what happened downstairs. Although, it was you who asked him to leave you alone, "Daddy please don't be mad. I asked him to leave."

Steve frowned at your words before shaking his head in reply, "Sweet girl, I'm not angry. I'm sorry I made you feel that way but I promise I'm not, okay?"

You slowly nodded in response, still unconvinced. Steve sighed in response and began gently rubbing your back as he spoke, "I'm not angry, I'm just a little upset that Bucky wasn't here while you were feeling this way, pretty girl."

You gulped before answering him in a quiet tone, "I asked him to leave me alone."

"Why would you do that, pretty girl?" Steve asked, although he already knew what happened as Bucky already texted him and explained the situation to him. He was upset that Bucky left, but he wasn't angry once Bucky explained that you asked him to leave. Now, he was just upset that you were all alone while feeling this way.

"Was feeling anxious...didn't wanna talk about it...still don't. Don't really know why I asked him to leave. I'm sorry..." You said, sniffling near the end of your sentence as the tears started flowing down your cheeks once again.

"Oh my sweet girl, it's okay, it's alright. There's no need to apologize, okay? Sometimes feelings like anxiety, or even sadness, make us do silly things. It happens to all of us, even me and Bucky." He carefully wiped your tears away before leaning down to kiss your forehead, "I'm right here, okay? I've got you, sweetheart. You just get some rest, and when Bucky comes home, we'll have a nice night in with some of your favourite pasta and whatever movie you want to watch, okay?"

You smiled and nodded your head in response. Steve smiled back at you and leaned down to kiss you again before getting up to pick up your favourite stuffie for you to cuddle with as you took your much needed nap.

taglist/moots: @starobi @chrisevansdaughter @cherryflavoredchapsticck @livvinitt @marvel1984 @babyhoneyriv @babyhatesreality @timidpumpkin @matchat3a @pono-pura-vida @sonalokibarnes @alex-ackerman-11 @ailathealternate @buckysugar

[vyloy]

Albert x reader dubcon pls :)))))

Albert James Moriarty

╰┈➤tw: dub-con, sub bottom male reader, kidnapping.

"Sherlock, you really have to focus on getting rid of *them*!", you say, a bit irritated due to how distracted he has been these past couple of months, it was all because of this one individual, William James Moriarty, an interesting fellow, although you have done your homework on him and his brothers, you weren't able to discover anything weird about them other than the fact they all made it out of a burning mansion with each other and nobody else, odd but not odd enough to tip you off. "I am! Just let me figure this out...And you're one to talk when you're always distracted by the brunette anyways", he says, not even turning around to face you, you were offended but couldnt deny the fact you've been interested in Albert but you've always focused on finding the brothers unlike Sherlock who has been focusing so much time on reading the newspapers about the crime lord or whatever, you understand it's important but not as important as the Moriartys quite literally sending a letter addressing the both of you, "Sherlock Holmes, we need to go", you say sternly, grabbing your coat and heading out in the dead of night, knowing Sherlock would follow you sooner or later.

Walking down the streets of London, you could hear the crawing of crows, really odd, they never craw unless there's danger-

Just as you were thinking about it, a dark figure runs past the alleyway beside you, you pause, realizing you should have never came out at might, especially not alone, you tried to brush it off, showing no fear as you walked back to the apartment, just as you were about to arrive safely, someone grabs you from behind, "Hey!-", "shh, be quiet if you will", the very much familiar voice hushes you, you try to remember whose voice it belongs to but fail to remember and just remain quiet. After a couple minutes of just standing there quietly, not making a sound, not that you could make much, the hand covering your mouth would muffle any sound you would make - the mysterious voice lets go of you, setting you free, you turn to look at the person and found a pair of green eyes staring back at you, "My apologies Mr L/n for having to cover your mouth like that, we couldn't have you screaming", "we?", just as you asked the question, you black out, probably due to the drug that was on Albert's gloves.

When you awoke, you were in a luxurious room, definitely more luxurious than what you could ever afford. You examined the room, still processing what had just happened and also trying to figure out whose manor you were in, it wasn't too hard to figure out it was the Moriarty's due to Albert being the last person you saw before passing out cold. You get up and walk around, examining things closer, of course you checked the windows first, removing the curtains and seeing if you could escape, unfortunately the windows are barred up in a way you wouldn't be able to escape even if you tried. You then checked the desk across from the bed, an ink pen, a few papers and also a candle were placed neatly ontop of said desk, making it look clean, 'this room is extravagant...', you thought to yourself, almost forgetting the fact that you were kidnapped, you shook your head and regained your composure, a knock on the door catches your attention as you quickly ran to the bed, pretending to still be asleep and hoping whoever walks in won't realize. "Hm?", a man's voice is heard, footsteps slowly walking beside the bed, "still asleep..?", he whispers to himself and not a moment later, footsteps are walking further and further away from you and the door is shut. As you thought you were in the clear, you opened your eyes, getting up, only to see Albert still standing in the room, a smile on his face as he notices your 'now awake' figure, "good evening Mr L/n", his smile stays the same as his head tilts a bit towards the left.

5 days have passed since you first arrived at the manor, the food has been exceptionally good, everything was set up in a way you could still enjoy yourself despite being kidnapped. It was now night time, you were reading a book and writing down some important things to do after you get out as Albert sits beside you, much of his attention is towards you. Suddenly, you hear someone entering the manor, as they speak, you can hear that it's clearly Sherlock, it seems Albert also heard as he is nervously fidgeting his fingers, "Y/n, forgive me", was all he says before grabbing your wrist, smudging your hand writing and pushes you onto the bed, "Albert?", you say in a confusing voice, why would he even push you onto the bed? "Do cooperate", he says before suddenly attacking your neck, licking it before biting down, "ACK!?", you try pushing him off but he's too strong, "shh", he says, still leaning on your neck, his nose brushing up against your neck gets you flustered, "Albert..! stop this!", you try to yell at him but his hand covers your mouth, muffling any sound from you, you eventually give up trying to fight back, hearing voices getting near the room, you try your best to stay quiet as Albert continues to mark your neck, "I heard some voices from here", "that was probably your imagination, please take your business downstairs, it is very impolite to barge into someone's room", you hear the voices of Sherlock and William, they seem to be fighting even if they're not raising their voices. The handle shakes, making your heart drop for a second but then you realized it's locked and the footsteps start fading into the distance. Albert finally looks at you, "did that scare you?", not knowing how to put it into words, you simply nod. Thinking this was over, you tried getting up, only to be blocked by Albert's body, his hand grabbing your wrist as you try to hit him, "my apologies but you're simply too delectable", was all he said before pushing you down yet again, undoing his tie with a smirk on his face.

"O-oh, good evening!", you stutter and blush a bit, embarrassed as you were caught in the act. Albert walks towards the bed, sitting on the bed and he apologizes, "I am very sorry to have to inconvenience you, I'm sure you and Mr Holmes have figured it out by now that...", he lets you finish the sentence, "that the Moriartys are the ones behind the lord of crime", "precisely", "that still doesn't explain why you kidnapped me all of a sudden", you demanded an answer, why would they keep YOU locked up and not Sherlock?, "It's obvious Mr Holmes cares for you but it's also obvious he'll do anything to stop my brother from doing the ultimate sacrifice, we need you to be a distraction as we can't allow our plan to be ruined", "so I'm a hostage?", "emm, if you put it like that..", he smiles nervously, not knowing what to say as you have figured out what he was trying to sugarcoat, "how long will i be held hostage?", "until the plan succeeds, at least a week and a half", "alright, you won't harm him in any way, right?", you ask with an intimidating expression, enough to make Albert a little more nervous, "we won't", "alright then, i'm okay with this, if you keep your promise".

With him being stronger, you had a hard time resisting against his lust but you would be lying if you said you didnt enjoy it even a bit, "A-Albert stop", "I'm sorry but i don't think i'll be able to, darling", as that nickname left his mouth, you melted a bit, the way he said it was full of lust, so inviting. The two of you were now so lost in lust, you couldn't even think anymore, did you want this? You had no answer to that question, too lost in the moment, "Y/n...please cry my name", he says just as he enters you, making you scream a bit, it was so sudden, you never even realized he had prepared you with his fingers just a few moments ago, your mind was just blank, "Albert..stop, stop this!", you cried out, you still took him so well, your hole just so tight around his cock, he couldn't stop even if he wanted to, your hole was inviting him, your cock dribbling with pre-cum, "please..", you continue to moan, not caring if others could hear your noises, this felt so wrong, having sex with your kidnapper, with the man involved in a string of murders and disappearances.

His voice was angelic, even if he was a demon right now, his moans were delicate, his groans were turning you on more than you'd like to admit, "It'll be okay, we'll be together", is the only thing he says before pumping your hole full of his cum, with just a few more thrusts, you also came, your chest full of cum and so was your hole, "A-Albert...", was all you said, you start to feel a bit light headed, Albert was there to support you, he pulls out and watches his cum seeping out of your hole, you were so full of his seed, "I'll show you so much more, stay with me Y/n".

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Taglist: @secretivemessenger @jkloserdazai @devilswhore-emrys

Been so busy these past few days, i keep saying i'm busy but it's true i promise😭 my s/o's birthday was a few days ago and i prepared so many stuff i felt like i would pass out

[raelle-writing]

Phee and Jin as parallels in DFF episode 7

I feel like I haven't seen enough people talk about how Phee and Jin are parallels in episode 7. Both reacting in anger in ways that damage Non, and that they likely carry guilt for in the future...

Spoilers for episode 7 below:

In episode 7, we see both Jin and Phee react to Non badly after finding out that Non has had sex with Keng. And the way they both react to that information is... not good.

Phee reacts to the knowledge that Non has been "cheating on" him (I'd like to remind people that Non was coerced so we as the audience shouldn't label it that way, but from Phee's POV that's what it was) by telling Non to "get lost and die"

And he says this despite knowing that Non has su*cidal tendencies and tried to take his own life what seems like mere days before this.

I feel like people gloss over this because they understand why Phee is angry. And I understand too. But the point still stands that Phee basically tells Non to go k!ll himself despite knowing that the consequences of that could be dire... and permanent. If Non actually d!es, disappears, or heaven forbid actually kills himself after this? I don't doubt that Phee will carry the guilt of those final words for the rest of his life, and think of what he could've and should've done differently to prevent that unfortunate fate...

On the other hand, Jin. Who reacts to seeing Non sleeping with someone by recording him. Jin isn't shown to post the video himself, but he still made that snap decision in anger. Copper has said Jin reacted this way because he thought Non was cheating on his boyfriend...

But regardless of his intentions, the fact remains that the video he recorded is the one that was later released. And you can see on his face even in the past that he feels bad about it, feels guilty for his part in what happened. And in the present you see that same guilt...

There's a parallel drawn between these two boys. The two leads of this series who have revolved around Non this entire time. One with a crush, one, his boyfriend. Both dealing with harsh emotions and dragged into the mess that's been created by the others. They both react in anger to the same situation, both do something INCREDIBLY damaging to Non in a snap moment of anger. And both of them, I'm sure, carry that guilt into the future...

It changes Jin from a happy, smiley person into one who is serious and harsh to his friends, who has a damaged relationship with those closest around him, who calls himself a coward and wants to run to another country and never come back.

And it changes Phee from someone who whole-heartedly loves and asks the person he loves to be his boyfriend... to someone who can't get the words out, who seems afraid of commitment. Because he could get hurt? Or because he could hurt them again?

The impact of these actions have changed both boys in the present, and the parallels in the episode are so striking and interesting... and I don't think people talk about it enough. There's potential for a compelling story about these two learning to heal and forgive themselves.

And I hope the show delivers on it, because it would be an incredibly deep and compelling story that touches on dark pieces of humanity that we all carry. The guilt and shame of not always being our best person, and the impacts that has on the people around us. It could show something really touching and heartfelt if these two people who were kids during all of this can learn to forgive each other, forgive themselves, and move into the future together.

[tmzrkstan]

the idol!reader stuff eats so bad but barely anybody does it

I am particularly passionate about this type of reading. And taking advantage of the moment, I leave here an old idea that I never gave a chance to. ;)

nct dream (hyung line) working with ex idol!s/o.

•----------••----------••----------••----------••-------•

genre: idol!reader, ex to lovers (?), smutty, adult language.

•----------••----------••----------••----------••-------•

✭MARK:

Looking from a professional point of view, it was such a great opportunity. You could finally get to do another kind of concept, show other side of yours. Besides, you knew very well how much of a talented idol Mark was. Your team almost beg you for you to do it, them just freaking out with the attention y'all would get.

Even when you accepted there wasn't really a lot of meeting with your ex. Untill the MV shooting day at least. There you were, watching Lee from far while finishing your make up. He was receiving instructions from the director.

"Hey..." your voice sounded quietly.

"Hi!" his eyes turned out similiar from a lost puppy. "You look nice... I mean, it´s nice seeing you." he just got a short smile from you. "Your part it´s really great"

"Of course, you must think so since you composed it" he stammered a bit before correcting himself "No, I meant you made it a lot better."

Before any more chances to say anything the director made you two start the work there. Both of you acting the way you were supposed to. Inside, you were annoyed and still feeling a litle hurt, on the Mark´s side, he was feeling awful. He knew it was his fault that the break up happened. You were the most understanding girlfriend ever, since you knew what beeing an idol means. But you also got tired of waiting for your turn, to get attention. He lost weeks not even calling you while on tour, but you didn´t. Always texted and videocalled him.

After a lot of fighting you gave up and clean the way for him to focus just on that. Lee really tried to see as the best thing for you both but he was suffering every day since. His members made him notice who the jerk was. He smiled like a child on Christmans morning whwn you agreed to collab with him. It was the last chance and it would be worth.

Hours passed out, your ex complimented and took care of you all day long. Those who didn´t knew about your relantionship were surprised by how a gentleman he was with you, who just tried your best not to fall for his sweetness again. Especially when you found a letter on your bag during a pause.

It was his hand writting and his true feelings. Apologies all over it, confessions like that he writted the love lyrics of the song for you and that he never stoped loving you. Admitted he was wrong and childshid and was ready for trying again if you do too.

''Oh boy'' you thought as seeing how good he was with words while they were on paper.

The last ''Cut!'' was heard and you carefully whisper at him "We can have dinner, that´s all." you bet he was happy. "Better not wase my time."

"I would never dare to do it again."

✭Renjun:

Beeing in a relantionship with him was sweet, comfortable and lovely. But unfortunally this only was like this when you still a trainee. When you had a chance to debut it all changed. Schedueles, dates, you lost time together and all the fighting started. You just didn´t talked with each other anymore since the end. Until you worked together in a survival reality as judges.

Everybody noticed how you were always on opposite sides and skewered each other for your different opinions. There were even compilations of yours fights, that carried a lot of chemistry and tension, on the internet every week and the audience loved this intrigue.

Eventually, they ended up having to help the same team, which made them put their fights aside and gather even behind the cameras looking for a solution to help the poor trainees.

"I can't understand your point" you rolled your eyes laughing "Of course you never did." he huffed "It's not all about you, though you may think so..." you were discussing what would be the best direction for a choreography.

"You're so childish! It's obvious that this step is better! You take it, however, you lose your balance at a certain point and end up almost falling, if it weren't for him catching himself abruptly. Eye contact was present and you felt your mouth go dry and your hands sweat.

"You should be more careful!" he puts you back on your feet, still holding tight to your waist. "If not what?" he looked down at you "What?" you then repeated "If not what will happen?"

"I'm going to have to teach you a few things…how to respect your elders." "How?" He sighed, smiling with some anger. Took you to the wall attacking your lips aggressively as he squeezes your waist again and you lose your fingers in his hair.

✭Jeno:

Starting to date with your co-worker wasn´t a really a good idea, especially if him was another MC from the TV show you worked on. But who could blame you for not resisting to Jeno? I mean, look at him right?

You should´ve said "no'' the first time he asked you out, but was too late now. After a few months you two had a big fight because of diferences on toughts and were obligated to work together for at least five weeks more. You runaway for as long as you could but after a quick tour on Asian you had to get back. But it was clear that he wasn´t going to make this easy.

A lot of smiles and flirting talks run free during the meeting for planning the week and when you were on make up session.

"Just shut your mouth up!" you yelled as soon as the stylists leaved the room.

"Why? Need it shut for you to kissed?"

"I´m gonna punch just on the midle of your face."

"The face you love." he smiled all playfull.

"I simply hate your attitude and confidence, you´re not that all." you roll your eyes as you listen to him laugh. "What?"

"It´s fun... the way we were making out on that sofa a few days earlier and now you are saying this stupid thing..."

"You are stupid." he got up, walking to behind your chair and facing you through the mirror. "Really, darling? Only because we had a silly fight you think that?"

"You know it wasn´t silly" you sigh. "For me it was, anything that keeps me away of these beautyful lips it´s silly..." he pus both hands around your shoulders, caressing exactly the way you like it.

"Don´t...don´t touch me." you hesitate before spinning your chair to his front. "I´m not going to fall for your charm again."

"So I do have a charm." his high was cut in half by his knees touching the carpet. "You fall once, sweetheart." he blinked slowly before biting his lower lip. "Let´s not promise things we can´t deal with later, ok?"

The door was open after three knocks, reveling the hairstylist team. He came back to his chair, with a cheeky smile. Oh, he was so sure you would be his again, just in a matter of time...

✭Haechan:

You really didn´t wanted to finished things with Donghyuck, but unfortunately beeing famous demanded a lot. When you noticed your, just recent, relantionship with him was making Haechan a lot distracted from his work you felt guilty. With wich power could you make him risk everything if you got into his life few days ago? So hard, but you did it. Lied and end it all because of "mental confusions".

But here you were, getting ready to practice a dance stage with him for an award concert. The fans picked you two for it, based on your aparently "friendship", and you get bad to your side if you recused.

Very diferent from what you expect, he was normal around, at least for his general behavior. He joked around with the dance instructor and tried to make you laugh, he wasn´t awkard at all. However, you felt very strange inside.

Luckly, you guys were quick with it and finished the day earlier. You grab your things nd almost run to grab the elevator, the same he stops putting one hand between the doors.

"Oh, isn´t such a coincidence?" he pressed the bottom on the metalic wall.

"I guess..." you smiled weakly.

"I didn´t get why you so weird around me..." he sigh slowly. "I should be the one to be like this, since you broke my heart few days ago, right?" even though his words looked painfull he was smiling yet. "You really didn´t had pitty for me, y/n..."

"Haechan, I..." your felt like falling as the elevator lurched and its lights were replaced by a darker, apparently the emergency one. "What´s this?" you grabed your bag stronger.

"Don´t worry, this one always do something like it, just wait a few minutes." he put his back at one wall.

"What? Why didn´t you told me before?" he looked down "I ask the same to you..."

"Come on, it´s not the same thing!" you frowned at him. "All we can do it´s wait, i swear it happended before."

"Fine... but I won´t be listening to you atacking me or my motives during this time!"

"I wouldn´t do it." he shrugged. "Even hurted, I know you didn´t mean anything that you said." "What?" the man came closer "It may look like not enough time, but I nkow you well by now. You were concerned."

"About?" he looked up "Me giving all of me in this...what did you called it? Hookup time."

"You can´t be sure of that." you tried to get back but he grabbed you wrist "But I am, as much as I decide to forgive you for this." he put one hand on your cheek "Also sure that you missed me how I missed you..." And everything happened quickly, the touch of lips, the lights and the elevator coming back and the doors opening in Jaemin and Jisung's faces who watched everything with a shocked face.

•----------••----------••----------••----------••-------•

[phereinnike]

OMINIS LORE DROPPED BY DIALOGUE AT THE END OF THE HISTORY OF MAGIC CLASS QUEST!

Pardon if the wording isn't exact, as you can see by the screenshot I'm playing in spanish, but here are some dialogue lines Ominis speaks to Natty and you if you stay to listen after finishing the History of Magic class map quest:

Quidditch:

"Next season the Chudley Cannons will be invincible, you'll see!

"My father was a great seeker and he always thought I'd be one too. Thank Merlin they cancelled quidditch."

"I miss attending the matches. Cheering everyone was very fun. And watching Isaac Cooper."

"My friends and I like to spend the evenings watching the sun set from the quidditch pitch. This year it isn't much good for anything else, unfortunately."

"I spent the entire summer practicing a full turn on a broom. What a waste!"

Family:

"This is the first year my sister is in Hogwarts. Whenever she pretends she doesn't see me in the corridors I make her trip with a jinx."

"This is the first year my siblings and I are together at Hogwarts. Our poor mother doesn't know what to do with so much time on her hands, so she knits. She sends us a new sweater each week."

"You try to work with a wand that has been through your three disastrous sisters."

"My father says he used to hide his homework under his bed."

"I used to write to my parents every week. Now I can't recall the last time I sent them an owl, do you think they know i'm still alive?"

"I hadn't met any of my cousins until i came to Hogwarts and saw that we were all in the same house."

"My brother has promised to give me his old broom when he saves up enough to buy himself a new one. I can't wait!"

Studies/teachers:

"If I manage to stop dissappearing my class notes while practicing evanesco I might even pass the Transfigurations O.W.L. this year."

"Professor Weasley is a trully incredible teacher. She never makes us write scrolls longer than necessary."

"Professor Weasley is already preparing me for the Transfigurations N.E.W.T."

"The other day Professor Black looked at me in the Great Hall and I spat my breakfast. I don't know if he might've taken it the wrong way."

"What a relieve that Black's children are too young to attend Hogwarts. I'd hate having my father as headmaster."

"Obviously, Hogwarts is the best magic school in the world. Everyone knows that. Of course, we'll be the best at magic in the world."

"Professor Howin is going to ask us about aquatic animals next week. I can't wait to tell her I saw a kelpie in Ireland this summer."

"I took my copy of 1000 Herbs and Magical Fungy to Herbology and left it in the greenhouse next to the mandrake seedbeds. Sharp was horrified by the fact that i didn't have it in class. He said I needed to sort out my priorities."

"Everyone is afraid of Professor Sharp, but not me. He's a brilliant man. And he has only yelled at me twice this week for setting my cloak on fire."

"I wonder how Sharp injured his leg. Surely, it must've been during his time as an auror."

"You should hear Shah talk about Divination. It's a miracle Onai's ears aren't burning. I'd say stars are more knowledgeable than cards."

"I'm still having a hard time brewing antidotes. I'm surprised to many of them ask for mandrakes. I'll make sure I set my career goals far away from that."

"That reminds me, did miss Scribner say we could take the book out at night or that she'd punish us if we did?"

"I've notices that if I pretend to pay attention in Potions, Sharp lets me be. It works well enough, unless he asks me a question. Then it's not a good plan at all. Actually, I wouldn't recommend it."

"Sharp caught me making faces behind his back. It was horrible... not to speak of all the house points I lost."

"if someone needs help with their studies or homework, I don't mind lending them a hand. Yesterday I wrote half a scroll for Binns during lunch break."

"I have no problem saying I have trouble understanding that Black is married. What kind of witch would give her hand to a man like that? On the other hand, that means there's hope for everyone."

"I need dragon-skin gloves for Herbology. I refuse to touch chinese chomping cabbages with my naked hands."

"Why aren't we allowed to use gillyweed? What's the point of learning Herbology if we can't mess around with gillyweed? If by the end of the trimester I haven't personally met a mermaid I'll be mad."

[unlike others] "I do like Transfigurations. The complex and precisse nature of transfigurations is admirable."

"I met some of my best friends in Flying class. Nothing strenghtes a bond like thinking you're going to die."

"Professor Weasley must be exhausted doing all her work and then Black's. We're lucky to have her."

Slytherin house:

"Someone got home-made chocolate cauldrons and shared them in the common room. But I think they might've confused the sugar with salt. There were half-eaten chocolate cauldrons in the common room for days."

"I don't know why each common room has a secret entrance. Who would want to go to another common room? We got sorted to our houses for a reason."

"Our dorm is atrocious. I wish people cleaned up after themselves once in a while. Last night a bundimun ate my homework. The potions one, too."

"I like to have a wiggenweld potion under my bed. Not to name any names but someone spent a lot of money on Zonko's."

"My side of the dorm is always impeccable, but I can't say the same about my dorm-mates. If I didn't know them I'd say they were raised by trolls."

Others:

"Has there been any news about the Pitt-upon-Ford Dragon? It makes me want to move, to be honest."

"My great-aunt was a Hufflepuf. She says they have the best common room because it's the calmest. Well, compared to the others."

"I wish I had brought a pet owl to school. I mean, I love my toad. More or less. You wouldn't be interested in getting a toad, would you?"

"Do all professors have their own owls? They must sent lots of letters. To the Ministry or something like that."

"So many letters arrive every day and none are for me."

"If i turn my toad into a cup again, I think it might insist I leave it like that."

"I'd like to retire in Hogsmead. Open a bar. Bore Hogwart's students with my childhood stories."

"I'd like to have a shop in Hogsmead one day. Gladrags Wizardwear could use some competition."

"I guess I'm curious about the beautification potion. What? It's not for me, idiot! It's for a friend. Don't say dumb things."

"Has there been any new about the Pitt-upon-Ford Dragon? It makes me want to move, to be honest."

"My great-aunt was a Hufflepuf. She says they have the best common room because it's the calmest. Well, compared to the others."

"Do all professors have their own owls? They must sent lots of letters. To the Ministry or something like that."

"So many letters arrive every day and none are for me."

"If i turn my toad into a cup again, I think it might insist I leave it like that."

"Have you been by the owlery lately? the house elves haven't been cleaning much this week."

"The other day Peeves distracted me and I bumped right into Adelaide Oakes. Both our books went up flying int he air. Peeves loved it."

"I don't like the size of my legs. Well, you were asking the other day, so I'm telling you."

"I had been collecting chizpurfle fangs all trimester when I thought, why not keep some chizpurfles."

"I really pity those who never get owl-post, poor guys. Have you seen their faces in the great hall?"

"I've heard girls talk about african snake skin near the bathroom. Do you think they're brewing pollyjuice? Oh, what if they've already brewed it and Sharp is actually that hufflepuff girl with the long arms?"

"Today I'm going to the green-houses to sow some knotgrass. Did you know it's used for pollyjuice potion? I think it's what creates the connection to the other person."

"There's an ex-auror living near Hogsmead. She wants to live a quiet life after fighting dark wizards."

"Do you know where I can get leaping toadstoll caps?"

"I just don't get it. Opalum. Who would think to put that in a potion?"

"The other day I got stuck in the Great Staircase for an hour waiting for it to change. Sharp wouldn't believe me when I told him that's why I was late."

"Parry Pippin sure did save me with his wiggenweld potion. In my opinion, his shop's better than any of the ones in London."

"Did you buy your bitterroot from Pippin or did you pick it up yourself? I need some desperately."

That's all I got after staying to listen for about an hour <3

[adamworu]

‘When’s the White Haired Anime Boy Going to Appear?’

For awhile, I often wondered about the phenomena of ‘When is the white-haired anime boy going to appear?’ posts during the heyday of Eva content on tumblr (2013-14). If you were around the Eva fandom on tumblr, or new to the show around that time like I was, you were probably bewildered too. It’s part of what got me into the show other than the character struggles and interesting worldbuilding.

Sure, you could chalk it up to people wanting to see more of Kaworu’s cute, but awkward mannerisms coupled with cryptic, though nonthreatening words. The bath scene of episode 24 is heavily quotable. There was also the influx of ‘headless’ memes (see: Pop Goes My Heart!).

But Eva was watched during many people’s adolescent years. High and low years. Critical years.

Evangelion itself is no stranger to struggles in formative years.

(talks about abuse under the cut)

I’ve always read Shinji as an audience surrogate because of how he’s at the center of these issues. Many of us have a Gendo: We hate them, yet we seek their validation, because unfortunately, they’re all we have. And yet they’re so emotionally cold and self-serving. 

Much of the series sees Shinji in less than optimal environments. His father is cold and distant. While Misato takes him in, she also makes him (and Asuka) fight angels due to her issues with her own father. Shinji and Asuka’s relationship within the household isn’t the greatest, either. They’re both emotionally damaged kids who can’t really properly sort through the baggage due to their environment. They’re mainly shouldering the burden of adult issues during their early teen years. 

They’re face to face with the open horrors of war. 

Kaworu comes in toward the tail end of the series. He asks nothing of Shinji but the narrative hardly portrays him as the sudden, immaculate savior. They get to know each other, and due to his deep traumas, Shinji is of course wary because being open means getting hurt again. So he puts his guard up. The more they interact, the more they both get to know each other. 

‘Why am I telling all this to Kaworu?’

This is less of a wariness of who Kaworu is and more of Shinji realizing he spilled part of his heart about his strained relationship with his father. Shinji realizes that he feels open, but not vulnerable. Kaworu feels the same way, replying to Shinji’s answers with ‘I think I may have been born to meet you, Shinji-kun.’

I sound like a broken record saying this but, Kaworu isn’t just his own person. He represents an ideal. This is a point I’m totally partisan to. That tinges of kindness can and do exist, even when one’s world is hell. 

On that end, I believe that, at least in the original series, that Hikari is Asuka’s Kaworu. Asuka’s guarded persona manifests as being proud and somewhat brash, but it’s a product of neglect. This worsens when she comes to understand in her environment that her accomplishments mean next to nothing. That she’s replaceable. 

The adults in Eva, even the adults of the adults get away with murder and seeing that as a victim of abuse drives a visceral rage I haven’t felt in years. And I’m sure this ire, this rising embitterment stirs in you too, if you ever lived in such an environment.

A lot of us were forced to wade through toxic environments for years while growing up. Had our share of bad relationships that still leave marks to this day.  A lot of us are victims chasing the closure that will sadly, never come because many of the people who hurt you walk away when they have much to answer for. Even if they do answer, is there any guarantee that they’ll be genuine?

When Shinji is with Kaworu and when Asuka is around Hikari they’re far less guarded. For the latter, we see a side of Asuka not seen before: one that’s tender. One that doesn’t feel burdened and otherwise ignored.

And that too, could describe that someone in our lives. The world doesn’t feel as daunting. You realize your worth and that you can be yourself when you’re around them. The barriers come down slowly and you stop saying sorry. You don’t feel as if they’re demanding that that happens. It simply just. Does. The people you hate or ignore your grievances seem insignificant in your life, even if for a moment. 

When we ask ‘When’s the white haired anime boy going to appear?’ what we actually mean is ‘When is our support system going to appear?’

I know that one day you will find your Kaworu. You deserve better than an apology. You deserve peace.