#what kind of messages are you sending the youth you inflict your presences on?

[rainbowvamp]

okay you know what.

it doesn’t make any fucking sense for vampire eyes to be gold if they drink only animal blood. the animal blood is still fucking red. hemoglobin. if the argument is “they don’t absorb the nutrients as well from animal blood” then they should be fucking pink. duh.

[shewhotellsstories]

Your Fave is Problematic Pt. 1: To Love is To Destroy

When Jace Herondale, the male lead in The Mortal Instruments, was six years old he was given a very harsh lesson for his birthday by his father in the form of a pet falcon. A falcon he was instructed by his demanding father to make obedient. He bonded with the falcon, tamed it, and loved it dearly.  Upon presenting the falcon to his father, his father snapped the falcon’s neck before his very eyes. Jace’s mistake from his father’s perspective was that he had ruined the falcon, he’d been told to train it, not to love it. When recalling this story to Clary ten years later, the moment has clearly left its mark as he tells her: “The boy never cried again and he never forgot what he learned: to love is to destroy, to be loved is to be the one destroyed.” (City of Bones 329)

To be clear asking Jace’s adoptive father Valentine Morgenstern, who abused not only his children but his wife, for advice on love, would be much like putting Bill Cosby on a sexual assault prevention task force. However in the world of Young Adult novels, ‘to love is to destroy’ is an apt observation. (City of Bones 329) In the scope of fantasy of a YA heroine, these things will be true: she will be beautiful, she will save the world, and she will find true love. But all too often in YA, “I love you,” is used as a justification for female characters being subjected to physical and emotional violence. In YA, the romantic relationships are often endgame, but very rarely are healthy. (Taylor 389)  And the way that these relationships that range from unhealthy to outright abusive are portrayed, discussed, and ultimately received by fans is troubling.

Although werewolves and the characters are fictional, dating violence among teenagers is an all too real problem. The CDC defines teen dating violence as the physical, sexual, psychological, or emotional violence within a relationship. 1 in 3 adolescents in the U.S. is a victim of physical, sexual, emotional, or verbal abuse from someone they’re romantically involved with. 1 in 10 high school students report having been physically hurt by a significant other. Girls and women between 16 and 24 experience intimate partner violence at three times the rate of the national average. 94 percent of those women and girls are between the ages of 16-19. (Loveisrespect | empowering youth to end dating abuse)

Teenage girls identify heavily with characters in the YA books that they read. In some cases, teenaged readers sometimes look to these characters for a model of how to handle real life situations.  (Kokesh, Sternadori 7) It’s normal and expected that female characters will find their soul mates before the age of 18. In fantasy, in particular, the relationships are written as being “fated.” (Taylor 391) As Kristina Deffenbacher noted the prominence of soul bonds in these books complicates narratives surrounding dating violence and not in a positive way. (Deffernbacher 926) It’s not inherently wrong to have a heroine or character involved in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, provided that the relationship ends.  More than that so long as the author makes it clear in the text the relationship was unhealthy or abusive. Making them permanent normalizes abuse. (Taylor 389) These narratives unfortunately rarely go that way.  As these characters are written as being destined to be together instances of abuse are easily brushed off, because the idea is that a relationship with a soulmate cannot be toxic as it was written in the stars. (Deffenbacher 923) Clary Fray, Celaena Sardothien, and Maia Roberts although all on varying spaces on the spectrum of unhealthy relationships each of their relationships represents a different sort of unhealthy relationship found in YA fantasy novels.

Maia Roberts and Jordan Kyle in The Mortal Instruments are an example of abuse being rationalized. Maia Roberts does not trust beautiful boys and with good reason. Her brother Daniel’s innocent looks are what made her parents disbelieve her when she tried to tell them about his violent behavior towards her until he died. The next beautiful boy she meets is Jordan Kyle, who would become her first boyfriend and her solace in a town where she was ostracized for being a curvy biracial girl in a sea blond hair and blue eyes. At least for a little while.  Further, into their relationship Jordan becomes possessive and jealous and more than once is physically violent with her.  Having had enough, Maia tried to end the relationship. Jordan responded by knocking her to the ground. Feeling like the only way out is to show Jordan their relationship is over Maia kisses another boy in front of him. She hoped that, that would be the end of that except that one night walking home a wolf follows her and bites her neck so hard that she winds up in the hospital. The bite is so brutal that years later she wears the scars from the attack on her neck. When thinking of the event later this would be recalled:

“Twenty-four stitches later, she was back in her pink bedroom, her mother hovering anxiously. The emergency room doctor had said the bite looked like a large dog's, but Maia knew better. Before the wolf had turned to race away, she'd heard a hot, familiar whispered voice in her ear, "You're mine now. You'll always be mine.” (City of Ashes 66)

The werewolf was Jordan Kyle. And when the readers meet him his version of events are somewhat different. In Jordan’s side of the story, which the reader only hears two books later it sounds like he only hit Maia once, whereas in Maia’s recollection whenever Jordan became angry with her he would slap her and got physical with her when she tried ending their relationship. Allowing Jordan to say that Maia was kissing another boy the night her attacked her, and not having any other character push back against it within the story gives the impression that Maia is partially responsible for Jordan attacking her. Also in his version of events his attacking Maia in his werewolf form was a random act of rage as opposed to the malicious act that the, “you’ll always be mine now” line suggests. (City of Fallen Angels 66) Perhaps this is done so that the audience will have an easier time forgiving Jordan. Either way, Jordan is set up to be a sympathetic character and not an abuser. When he’s introduced he’s described as attractive, puppy-like, laid back. Not the sort of boy you would think would hit his girlfriend. And in the narrative, he has been wrought with guilt over hurting Maia.

Jordan maneuvers his way back into Maia’s life, in a completely different state in the hopes of reconnecting with her because he feels a sense of “responsibility.” (City of Fallen Angels 764) However, he’s still exhibiting abusive behavior. He befriends Maia’s friends, without them knowing what he’s done to get close to her. He interferes with her relationship with the boy she’s currently dating without her knowledge. He professes to be doing these things in the name of wanting to atone for his past behavior, but it’s because of the nature of Jordan’s past behavior that it’s wildly inappropriate for him to be exerting any kind of influence in Maia’s life without her knowledge or consent. This is never truly addressed.

Much of the narrative surrounding Jordan and Maia’s relationship revolves not around the pain his behavior caused Maia, but around Jordan’s guilt and desire for redemption. Culminating in Jordan and Maia rekindling their relationship and no one expresses concern. Upon first seeing him again Maia is furious and hurt.  Jordan should feel guilty for what he did to Maia, it might have been fine for Jordan to apologize to her (without inflicting his presence on her).  This apology could have been a source of closure for the both of them. However, knowing the lethal and tragic results that usually come from young women giving their abusers second chances, having a 16-year-old girl take back her abusive ex-boyfriend was wildly irresponsible. We live in a world where men who abuse their partners are all too easily forgiven, having the person a character abused as well as all of her friends so easily forgive his abuse perpetuates the idea that domestic violence is acceptable and forgivable.

On Cassandra Clare’s Tumblr fans of the books expressed concern that Maia and Jordan rekindling their relationships despite their violent history might send a bad message. (Clare, “Jordan and Maia”) She responds by saying that “portrayal is not endorsement” and  “I might think that the message of Maia and Jordan’s relationship was “girls will forgive their abusers” if Maia actually did forgive Jordan and accept him back into her life, but she doesn’t.  She tries temporarily — she really does believe that Jordan was behaving out of character due to the werewolf transformation he was undergoing, and indeed that magical aspect of things absolutely muddies the water. Even though she may be right to some degree that the fault on Jordan’s side is complicated, she realizes she can’t forgive him, realizes she doesn’t want to be with someone who did what he did to her and decides to dump him.” (Clare, “Maia and Jordan)

Generally speaking yes, portrayal is not an endorsement, provided that there isn’t endorsement within the portrayal. Jordan is accepted amongst Maia’s friends.  In the fifth book City of Lost Souls and the beginning of City of Heavenly Fire they’re dating and sleeping together. When Jordan dies, he spends his final moments being held by Maia.  He gets to have all those things despite how horribly he treated Maia.  He’s a romanticized and sympathetic character remembered fondly after his death.  That’s a form of endorsement.

In summation cool motive werewolf boy, still, abuse.