#who fucking knows how long it will take til we finish this show 😭

[allofuswantgwinam]

my bestie who i watch series with… i f’d up. I got us watching A Shop For Killers knowing i can’t binge it now 😭😭😭 rip

[borathae]

I just finished chapter 3 and holy shit.

At first I was like there is no heart to break anymore so why does it hurt so much😭 You are literally ripping my heart out every time. My baby is experiencing so so much pain. I can't take it. The emotions, Sibi how can you write so powerful that it's hitting me so hard.

The dinner was so awful. God, we all know her parents are the worst but nothing has changed (not that I expected them to but...) and now Koo is the bad guy. And they are treating him so bad when he is already at his worst. This is so fucked up. I am glad he left the dinner and told them to choke on their shit. Never let them take you down again baby.

And scene with his sister. Again so much sadness. She knows or at least knows a bit what's going on. And she can't do anything. This is how it feels to be powerless when a loved one experiences dark times. She just watches how Koo slowly losing himself. And the fact that he can't be open with her breaks me. He has nobody who helps him. He needs to let it out soon or it's too late.

And the failed hand job. He can't even reach his high anymore. This is how much his body is affected by his mind. Physical health and mental health are a unit. The suicidal thoughts and everything he is facing are now affecting his body. The sirens are on my friends. There needs to be a solution soon. I am really worried. Actually I am worried the whole time but this is the final straw. Btw thank you so much Sibi for showing the effects of mental health on physical health. It's so important. And if I hear mental health is not important or less important than physical health one more time I will vomit.

The whole time I was like Sibi said it's going to be a least a bit fluffier. Where is the one step towards the light? Where? I need it.

And finally we got this beautiful scene where he stays with Lucky. I am actually so so glad Lucky was able to convince Bunny to stay. Like I don't even want to know what he would have done to himself. Lucky reads the signs with this role play and she maybe safed his life that day. (I am also assuming that there is more to the story about the person who did this kind of role play too) And the fact that he needed a long hug so bad. I am devastated. He needs this physical affection and someone to rely on.

And them taking off their masks what wonderful scene. And him touching her face in dark. I am melting.

Maybe now he can rely a bit on her. The last sentence gives me hope. The first time he sleeps there. So there will be more I hope. I really hope it will get better at least a little bit. For the sake of my heart and for Koo. Healing is not linear but maybe this is a start. Or he is at least escaping hell😔

And thank you love for this highly emotional chapter. I can't wait til Saturday. I am so immersed in the story as you see☺️

And I hope it's okay to send such a long ask. I just love talking about the details and the emotions I felt while reading. Let me know if it bothers you.

Last but not least take care of yourself. Stay hydrated and eat well Sibi. Lots of love❤️

🌟

OMGMGM MY STAR!!! I AM GOING TO SOB :((

PLEASE THIS IS THE BEST MESSAGE EVER :((

First of all: And if I hear mental health is not important or less important than physical health one more time I will vomit.

OMFG PREACH!! istg I am convinced that the body can only really be healthy when the mind is healthy. At least I can see that by myself when my anxiety is really bad my body starts aching too fjadsjfj

Also I am very happy that so many people seem to enjoy the face touching scene because sAME HAHAHHA THAT SCENE KEEPS ME GOING IN LIFE 😔

Also please :( keep sending in those long asks, I LOVE reading about your thoughts and feelings, literally it fuels me 🥺💜💕