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#why is there no f5 f8 in real life
dragonagitator · 7 months
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My poor IRL husband has been subjected to my nattering on about BG3 for months now and has become quite bored by the topic, but tonight he finally agreed to watch some YouTube videos about the game and he did find those to be moderately interesting.
I then reminded him that he'd enjoyed the D&D game we played in with our neighbors a couple years ago, and I suggested that joining another campaign could be a fun way for us to make friends in our new city. But since he'd found it so confusing last time, maybe he should try playing BG3 for a while first as practice to get more familiar with basic D&D mechanics? Then he wouldn't have to constantly stop to ask questions at the table, and he agreed that might be a good idea.
And then I was like oh, you know how you found the D&D character creation process so confusing and time-consuming? Well, BG3 has this neat feature where you can play as one of the companion characters instead of having to make a new character from scratch, and he perked up at that.
I then mentioned that Gale was the BG3 character who most reminds me of him, so Gale would likely be the easiest origin character for him to relate to. So he should probably just be Gale because then he'd be able to start playing the game immediately with a prerolled character, and the Narrator would even help him along the way by explaining his backstory and motivations, and he seemed receptive to that idea.
at this point I'm internally screaming like
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This conversation has been going so well for me so far that I decide to press my luck a little more.
Me: "You know what could be reeeeeeally fun? What if I sewed us some costumes of our Baldur's Gate characters so we could dress up like them and have ~☆~adventures~☆~ together, like--"
Him, excitedly: "Ooh! We could go to a Ren Faire!"
...which wasn't exactly where I was going with that.
But he does like the idea of a purple velvet tunic! Alas, he insists that he's completely incapable of growing a proper beard, but I'm still holding out hope for a slutty little clip-on earring.
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ldrfanatic · 13 days
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Writing Prompts (from my top favorite taylor swift albums)
how to read/request: the letter at the beginning of each prompt represents the album key below. The number attached is to distinguish the lyrics.
key: t - tortured poets; r - reputation; f - folklore; l - lover;
you can request as many prompts as you’d like!
example request:
t16 & f12 for theodore nott
tortured poets
t1 - "I'm having his baby" no I'm not but you should see your faces
t2 - the coward claimed he was a lion
t3 - "I'll never leave" Nevermind
t4 - You know how to ball I know Aristotle
t5 - Who's gonna know you like me?
t6 - Everything comes out teenage petulance
t7 - If I can't have us, I might just not get up
t8 - two graves, one gun
t9 - I'm just getting color back into my face
t10 - If you wanted me dead, you should've just said
t11 - Is it a wonder I broke, let's hear one more joke
t12 - I was tame, I was gentle
t13 - I'm always drunk on my own tears
t14 - I'm fearsome, and I'm wretched, and I'm wrong
t15 - what we thought was for all time, was momentary
t16 - Did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?
t17 - Who are we to fight the alchemy?
t18 - Cause the sign on your heart said it's still reserved for me
t19 - This town is fake but you're the real thing
t20 - They said "Babe you gotta fake it till you make it" And I did
t21 - He said he'd love me for all time
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reputation
r1 - In my dreams, you should see the things we do
r2 - You and me would be a big conversation
r3 - I'm one call away whenever you need me
r4 - I don't wanna be just another ex love
r5 - You've been calling the bluff on all my usual tricks
r6 - They say I did something bad, then why's it feel so good?
r7 - don't blame me, love made me crazy
r8 - my drug is my baby, I'll be using for the rest of my life
r9 - For you I would fall from grace, just to touch your face
r10 - If you walk away, I'd beg you on my knees to stay
r11 - I'm yours to keep and I'm yours to lose
r12 - You know I'm not a bad girl but I do bad things with you
r13 - I'm so chill, but you make me jealous
r14 - You ruined my life by not being mine
r15 - Guess I'll just stumble on home to my cat. Alone. Unless you wanna come along?
r16 - You had turned my bed into a sacred oasis
r17 - I'm a mess but I'm the mess that you wanted
r18 - My hands are shaking from holding back from you
r19 - I don't want you like a best friend
r20 - Only bought this dress so you could take it off
r21 - I want to wear his initial on a chain 'round my neck. Not because he owns me, but cause he really knows me.
r22 - You don't need to save me, but would you run away with me?
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folklore
f1 - If you wanted me you really should've showed
f2 - If my wishes came true, it would've been you
f3 - If one thing had been different, would everything be different today?
f4 - I knew you leaving like a father running like water
f5 - You drew stars around my scars but now I'm bleeding
f6 - I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss
f7 - I knew to love would be to lose my mind
f8 - I knew you you'd come back to me
f9 - I had a marvelous time ruining everything
f10 - I loved you, I swear I loved you, til my dying day
f11 - You can aim for my heart go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones
f12 - I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me
f13 - Love you to the moon and to Saturn
f14 - Then you won't have to cry. Or hide in the closet.
f15 - Passed down like folk songs, our love lasts so long
f16 - I didn't know if you'd care if I came back
f17 - I just wanted you to know, that this is me trying
f18 - It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
f19 - You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else
f20 - You know damn well for you I would ruin myself
f21 - Don't want no other shade of blue but you
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lover
L1 - I forgot that you existed, and I thought that it would kill me but it didn't
L2 - It isn't love, it isn't hate it's just indifference
L3 - What doesn't kill me makes me want you more
L4 - I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you
L5 - I love you, aint that the worst thing you ever heard?
L6 - He looks up grinning like a devil
L7 - This is our place, we make the rules
L8 - Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?
L9 - Can I go where you go?
L10 - I'm so sick of running as fast as I can
L11 - I've got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you
L12 - Help me hold onto you
L13 - Who could ever leave me darling, but who could stay?
L14 - They see right through me. I see right through me. Can you see right through me?
L15 - All the king's men, couldn't put me together again
L16 - All of my enemies started out friends
L17 - His hands around a cold glass make me wanna know that body like it's mine
L18 - Wanna see what's under that attitude
L19 - I want you, bless my soul
L20 - You know I adore you
L21 - It's you and me, that's my whole world
L22 - Voted most likely to run away with you
L23 - I think you should come home
L24 - I'll never let you go cause I know this a fight that someday we're gonna win
L25 - Kiss you twice cause it's gonna be alright
L26 - I'd marry you with paper rings
L27 - That's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend
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riddlesandqueries · 4 years
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Somebody Sure As Hell Messed Up (Part 4)
(In which Music Meister, nee Dennis Prowell, and The Toyman, rarely known as Winslow Schott, have a revealing conversation over board games.)
"I like to know as much information as I can. It helps things run smoothly." said the Toyman.
Dennis took a deep breath in, then out. No theatrics this time. "Fine. You want the real story. Here it is.”
“...This was a team effort: I was showing her a night on the town. After that whole 2000 scare I just thought a day to celebrate the New Year was what she needed. What I said about breaking in was true. We were stealing ... miscellaneous goods when your bowl arrived. It wasn't until the building started to crumble apart when she pushed me into the hand though. So there it is. Are you happy?"
"Really? She actually pushed you? That's something I'd expect her to do to me, not you. You two were supposedly pretty chummy." Winslow leaned in.  "Goes to show you, she's a dangerous one."
"Well I would've expected Lyle to be more of the type to do such a thing. But I softened him up. I suppose I just didn't have enough time to get close to Darci. At least not to the point of being as chummy as you'd think." Dennis made a meek attempt to whistle to fill in the silence, but the mic on him kept making the pitch off key and weird. Definitely something he stopped a few seconds in. "I doubt she'll come over for some tea. You got no use keeping me around if that's the case."
"Oh she'll come. I've got my best man on it right now. And you'll be staying for a while. I can't help but be a little suspicious, you know? And we can keep each other company until our little reunion!" said Winslow, failing to hide the excitement in his voice.
"Suspicious? Me? Perish the thought."  Shit. You blew it, Prowell. Dennis bared a smile that was more than a little ingenuine. "So. We're going to 'keep each other company?'"
"Naturally! I haven't had a guest over in a very long time. Tell me, do you like board games?"
A very long time, huh? "Board games are fun." Dennis tried to match Winslow's energy. In truth, Dennis was much more fond of scrapbooking news articles about crime than he had been about board games when he was a child. The only board game he's truly interested in is D&D, but that was neither here nor there.
"I have quite a few, but be warned! I've had a lot of time to practice." One of the doors to the room slid open to reveal a tall shelf full of colorful boxes.
"Ah, well! It looks like you've got a lot of things to keep us occupied. Ha." God. I wish Hartley were here...
"How about Battleship? Or Chutes and Ladders?" Winslow hopped down off of his chair and went to the shelf to peruse the collection. "Or maybe Connect Four?"
Yeah... Hart's just the person I'd want to see right about now. "Now, Battleship's something I know haha!"
"Oh boy! Sounds good to me!" He grabbed the box from the shelf and took his seat again,  pulling the screens out of the box and sliding one down to Dennis. Winslow began setting up his side.
Dennis followed suit. "So you haven't had a friend over in a long time?"
"No, not since Peter. And I can't even remember the time before that. Mostly, it's just me and the friends I make myself. Uh, just say when you are ready."
He gave a thumbs-up in response. "G7. Merkel? Oh! He's been over at Sel's a couple of times. Very fond of Twister I've heard." Dennis then stopped for a moment. "Wait, then how did you meet Darci? Was it a henchgirl for hire gig gone to pot?"
"M-miss; J4" Toyman’s voice stammered as he placed a piece in his water. "You... you don't know do you? That's... kinda funny actually. You haven't noticed anything, well, peculiar about her, have you?"
"Hit. B2. No, nothing that would warrant suspicion. But that's coming from a Gotham resident. Maybe that sort of stuff flies past me." He stopped, just for a moment. "Then she's got something wrong with her, huh?"
"Oh no, she's perfect." He paused.  "Well, correction: she was a little bit more rebellious than I expected. Hit! J5."
"Miss. B3" Rebellious, he says. Rebellious. Sure you can call a student or criminal rebellious. But a lover? Not unless you got something wrong with your own methods... "Is that so?"
"Hmmm, Hit. You sunk my destroyer! J3?" said Toyman, considering his move. "You think you've got someone figured out, and they go and manage to turn your life topsy-turvy. I just don't know how she did it, but oh boy, did she."
"Hit. A1. You could say that about anybody though. Everybody's kinda got layers to them you know. Like tree rings. Or cake."
"Miss. J2. I suppose that's true, but she really isn't just anybody."
"Hit. A5. Then who is she?"
"She is mine." said Toyman, pointedly, before clearing his throat. “Ahem. Miss. H3."
... Noted. "I'll rephrase the question. What was she like to you? Miss. F6."
"At the start, she was my perfect doll. Then a switch was flipped, and she fled. Eventually, that Big Blue Bully got jealous when I tried to get her back, but we fled together. I thought it would be different, or rather back to the way things were, but she was just as manipulative as she was when she left. Hit. J1."
"Hit. The ship has sunk. F5." ... This bitch is lonely. If I connect the pieces together, then he's probably been wallowing in his misery ever since. "That sure sounds rough. I totally get it. Is there anything you've done for yourself since she left?"
"Oh, you know. Just a lot of work around here. Trying to stay busy. I started my blog, but that didn't really pan out...Miss. E7?"
"Hit. C9." Bingo. "Maybe you could benefit from getting out more. I mean more than just a blog. Get some friends with different perspectives. Live a little. You discover more about yourself that way."
"I don't know where to begin with something like that.” replied Toyman plainly. “It's not like someone like me can just go out and try to chat with random people. People would take one look at me and want to run. It might be different over in Gotham, but over here, they would never. Miss. F6."
"You started off with your blog. And that got Peter to talk to you. That was a good starting point.
 Maybe you could do the same thing. But you know. Without any alias or villain names. Then you wouldn't limit the people who share your niche interests to just rogues. Hit. C4"
"Miss, G7, And I don't think I can. I'm not much else but "The Toyman" anymore. I've devoted my entire life to get revenge on one man, and some alien takes him out before I got to try again. I'm not sure I am who I was anymore because I've been me for so very long."
"Hit. You sunk my ship. G1." Maybe that's why Darci ran off. Tch. "Then... Let's start off even smaller. Yeah. Bake the layers of your cake before you make the frosting! We'll just have to find some hobbies that click. Then we can go from there."
"Well, obviously I like toys. Uhhh, mechanical engineering? And movies.” He seemed curious, despite the mask. “Miss. C3"
"I'm sure there's plenty of other people out there who like movies and engineering too. Ever thought about joining a STEM group? Miss. F7."
"Hit. C9? There probably are, but what if they don't like me, or they find out who I am?"
"Hit. F8. If they're really your friends they wouldn't care, would they?" replied Dennis easily, although as his words settled in, he couldn’t help but wonder… I'm sure there's going to be someone to get me out of here. Hopefully not Darci… What if they've already forgotten about me? Or that they wanted me gone this whole time and they're celebrating my death as the minutes pass by? ...But that couldn't be the case. Almost everybody loves me!...Right?
"Hit. C10...I'm... not sure I want to talk about this anymore." murmured Toyman, presumably glancing away. "Do... do you like any movies?"
"Hit. F9." It's your funeral. "Oh, sure I like movies." Dennis smiled.
"Hehehe! Miss! C8? Do you have a favorite movie? O-or maybe a favorite genre?"
"Hit. E9, and… I only ever liked Quentin Tarantino flicks." he replied, with a blissful smile to accompany his lie. "I've always been enamored by the harsh reality of crime. It's just so intoxicating. Wouldn't you agree?"
"Miss. C7? Really? That's quite an interesting revelation about you, Mr. Prowell. I would have pegged you as just a musical fan, but that's what I get for assuming. I must admit it might not completely be my cup of tea, but I did enjoy Pulp Fiction."
"Hit. G9. Oh yeah! Crime's always been a big part of my life. My folks have always been a big inspiration for me when it comes to that."
"Miss. C6. Really? Your parents were criminals, then?"
"Hit. E5. Of course. Fine upstanding people they are. Looong before Big Blue came to town. Their old names were Songbird and Fireball. That ring any bells?"
"Miss. C6. They sound familiar, but I can't quite put my finger on it."
"You already played C6. Tch...They were part of an underground gang way back when. But they quit that sort of work before I came along. Never told me why though. Which is strange..."
"Oh, silly me. I meant to say C5. Hmmm... Where were they out of?"
"Hit. You sunk my ship. A8, and...The Intergang, I think. That place used to be big on recruiting metas back in the day. I know that for sure."
"They were INTERGANG? I don't blame them for leaving. Miss. D10."
"Yeah it had something to do with a mix up that led to members getting killed. Least that's what my Pop told me. But my kidnapping was when my folks were especially put off by the business. The first one. Miss. D1"
"'Mix-up?' I wouldn't be surprised if that's just what Mannheim said to cover his tuchus. I still wish I could have been the one to finally stop that bully. Miss. B10"
"Wait, you were after Manheim? Which one?"
"Bruno. That awful devil sent my father to prison and ruined my entire life."
"I was fucked over by Moxie Manheim! Damn old coot must be in his grave by now... Anyways! You know how there's an initiation to join?"
"Ha! Well, it's a small world after all! I think I heard something about it somewhere. Why?"
"Yeah, well... Moxie didn't really enjoy that Songbird and Fireball ditched the Intergang to start a family, so he decided to keep tabs on them. Their weaknesses and all that. Now, Moxie also had some new recruits lined up waiting to be official members." Dennis leaned in, conspiratorial.."He's got a big criminal brain as you know, so he thought it'd be real wise to make me a part of the initiation. Killing two birds with one stone, as they say."
"D-did they do it?" asked Toyman, on the edge of his seat.
"Of course they did it! Stole me away while my folks were vulnerable! Nothing much I could've done, figuring this was back in 1977." Dennis collected himself. "But they weren't having it! This was the last straw, Winslow!" He held up his index finger rather righteously. "And you know what happened?"
Winslow leaned closer in anticipation. "What?"
"They snuck in there and took me back! But not without a musical number first!" said Dennis proudly. Plain as day, he looked up to his parents: it showed in the glow of his smile.
"That must have been an absolute delight to see. So, you inherited your powers from a parent? Songbird, I presume? What could Fireball do?"
"She shoots a flare gun." he grinned. 
"Truly fascinating! Um, also, it's still your turn. B10. Was that the last they heard from Mannheim and company?"
"Miss. B10. Oh no. not at all. A bunch of failed attempts were made afterwards. And well, since Moxie's departure, Bruno was the guy looking out to see if they were any trouble. But now that Bruno's dead and Vito doesn't really care. There's some peace." Something, just then, just clicked into Dennis' mind. And oh how ironic it was. "Until now."
"Miss. B5.” sighed Toyman. "If you are referring to me, please don't be so dramatic. I mean you no harm, unless you mean it to me. I only want a little incentive for Darci to come here. And if she pushed you into my robot's clutches like you said, perhaps her final capture will be something you can relish as well."
"Miss, B5...Hmmmm.” thought Dennis, smiling a bit. "Well... I just find it hilarious that out of all the villains who I fall into the clutches of, it had to be the one that happens to despise the Manheims the most." He started fidgeting with a red piece in his hand. "Call it a hunch, but this seems a lot like destiny."
"It was quite the coincidence! As I said earlier, it's a small world. I might not say destiny, but who knows? Miss, D5?"
"Miss. E2. Well, nothing's impossible, kid."
"Miss. I8...Perhaps." Winslow fell silent, awkward.
"Miss. H1...For someone called the Toyman, you're not much of an optimist are you?"
"Miss. H8. For someone named Music Meister, you're not much of a musical film fan."
"It's not my fault that musicals are better on the stage." He smirked. “Miss. J6. Much more of an experience, you know? To go out and see something like that live and in the present."
"Miss. I9. I... see your point. But you're right, optimism isn't my strong suit anymore..."
"Anymore? Then that means there was a point in time where you were an optimist!" There's still hope!
"When I was a kid, sure. But after my father was sent away, well, it hasn't been very easy."
"Have you been to therapy for that?"
"No, my foster families never wanted to pay for something like that."
"But your foster families don't control you anymore, you're a free man! If you're able to afford it, at least give it a try."
Winslow buries his masked head into his hands. "But can a wanted man like myself just waltz into some therapist's office without a dozen people calling the police on him?"
"People wouldn't recognize you without...the mask, would they?" asked Dennis, curious.
He looks up with a shrug. "I'm 4' 10", and have a rather distinct voice. They might not know my face, but they still might know me. If I'm lucky, then everything would be fine, but if I'm not, then I might be in a lot of trouble.”
"Jeez, Metropolis has got some shit health care, doesn't it? If that's what's keeping you from healing... Hmm." Dennis tried to come up with an appropriate counter argument.
“I9. Being a supervillain isn't all it's cracked up to be."
"...But being an actor is! I've got it! And it's brilliant! Maybe we can't do much about your height, but you can do something about your voice and movement!...Oh. Sorry. Miss. H3."
"C-come again?" Toyman was genuinely surprised. "I don't... I'm not really... um...Miss. G2."
"Yeah, okay. You'd have to practice speaking from your diaphragm, but that's gonna be a sinch cause you got a performer around!" Dennis pondered. "Maybe change the names a bit for this new persona... That'd work so you wouldn't have to lie in therapy per se. We all know that goes nowhere."
Dennis made a square with his index fingers and thumbs to frame Winslow.
"I can totally see your persona now Winn! Hit! I10!"
"I'm not... sure... what you're talking about? I.....?" flustered the Toyman before sighing. "Miss. F2."
"You seem so deadset on people hating you, right?  And the inability to socialize and get proper therapy is what's holding you back from being a healthy and paranoid free individual, right? 
So, we just need to make you a persona so people won't know you're the Toyman! So people won't ‘hate’ you! It's a genius plan! I swear!" smiles Dennis, putting heavy finger quotes on the word hate, as  he genuinely didn't believe that everyone everyone hates him. “Oh! Hit! F10."
"I don't think... Let me just say: I don't want to be anyone else. I am me, no matter how awful my life has been, I can't really change it. If I try to make a new me, that can only take me so far before I just go back to being me. I can't make people stop disliking or fearing me. But I have been trying to change the way I go about what I do. I wanted to stop Mannheim from ruining any more families' lives, and I want to help make sure no more families are robbed of their lives because of some self-centered sneak!" Winslow’s voice slowly rose to a shriek, before he finally settles back down into his chair with another sigh. "Miss. H2."
After a brief pause, Dennis gently pat Winslow in the shoulder. "You're gonna lose your voice if you keep yelling like that." sighed Dennis kindly. "I get that you're trying to be noble and save families and whatnot, but if you keep going about this like a self-deprecating martyr, then soon there won't be much left of you to save any families. Hit. I4."
He shrinks away from the first pat, but eases on the following. "...Yeah, I suppose. But at least I did help, right? Miss. I2."
"Yeah. Yeah you did. Hit. H2."
There was a pause as Winslow looked down at the table. Without looking up, he muttered “Hit. E2...and...thanks."
There's the ticket. Actually, this time… "No! Noo! It's just what friends do." A warm, glowing smile swept across Dennis’ face. "If you really think people won't like you, then I won't push it anymore. But I like you. I like your motives too. So don't stress about it that much."
"Y-you like me? I'm your friend?"  said Winslow, genuinely taken aback.
"Of course!" Dennis said, minimizing the situation.
"I... I've always wanted a... a real friend..."
"If you wanted a friend, then why didn't you just ask?" Dennis gave Winslow that same warm glowing smile as he stood up.
Winslow sat still for a couple seconds before his emotions did finally catch up to him. He sobbed slightly but collected himself quickly. "Thank you so much!" he said, much happier than he'd sounded before. "So...E2?"
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Episode #15 “I AM SHAKING BECAUSE I MADE FINAL 5” -Rachael
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-I really feel like Jess and Gavin are up to something shady this round. Gavin came to me saying that he and I didn’t have as good of a chance as all of the others but he has how many immunity wins? LOL, I’m playing into it but okay. I really think I’m going to use the power that Ali sent me since it expires tonight and somehow I feel like it could all turn back to me if I don’t use it tonight. I don’t know what I would do without Ali. I honestly hope that I don’t make it to the final three because I want to fight for him in jury and vote for him to win this thing. 
-I have never been happier to win immunity in my life! I am at Disney living my best life and I don’t have to worry about Ali or I going home because I’m immune and he’s using our idol. We decided last night to vote for Rachael because she has so many friends on the jury. If I do make it to the end with Ali I don’t think I’ll win but I will be JUST as happy for him! I feel like I may end up getting fourth because I feel like Ali will win the next immunity and I have the fourth place curse.... we’ll see! 
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-okay so there is a lot to discuss, my brain is fried. first off a recap of the final seven vote, so i lose immunity IMMEDIATELY unsurprisingly, and then i'm like well its over. But then while Timmy maybe at some point pushed my name, Gavin from bizarrely early is down to vote Timmy. And Timmy going is something I've wanted for a while. so JDFKAS. also when it came down to potentially voting Jess, the reasons I didn't get on board were because a) Timmy/Rachael were selling their souls to whoever would listen and I didn't want them to run to Jess b) that would empower their duo in the endgame, and solidify me likely getting 6th or 5th. So, I voted Timmy (while playing up to Rachael that'd I'd vote with them, to hopefully have her vote if I needed at F6). Timmy I've had a real rollercoaster of a relationship with this season, I at points found him very frustrating and was very mean at points, but I do think as But now here we are at F6. After Timmy left, I went idol hunting and found a new path I'd heard zero mention of all season, and so I told Ruthie and she FOUND THE REHIDDEN MERGE IDOL. THAT'S MY FINAL TWO AMERICAAAAAAA. The way I would literally die for Ruthie, that is my queen. Anyway so other than that, I then studied SOO hard for the immunity challenge, and won despite the fact that Gavin TRIED TO MAKE ME LOSE. the way I can't stand men. But he can stay mad because i WONNN (he also hasn't pm'd me since). Making F5 and making finale is a milestone I never thought I'd reach playing the way I have so I'm SUPER proud. This endgame is really really tough. I do think Rachael/Jess are likely my biggest threats, Rachael is so so likeable, the entire jury is full of her allies and that makes her a major endgame threat. Jess is so tough. Jess I can't decide how much of a threat she is, she definitely has had the most control (after me), but she also has turned on some of her allies for zero reason or benefit, which looks very bad. Like her voting out Keegan, arguably Zach and also being in on the plan to vote Chips make very very little sense. So I do think my biggest jury threat is Rachael. But I also don't wanna send her to jury feeling burned by me most of all? So I think the ideal scenario tonight is that I vote with Rachael, maybe... for Jess? BUT Rachael goes and then goes to jury not mad at me? And she has clout with the jurors I need on side, the Timmy Z/Bodhi/Keegan/Collin contingent group. I think(?) I can beat Birch/Ruthie/Gavin, just due to my role in Ruthie's safety for a couple of rounds with my powers, and then I do think I've had great game impact than Birch/Gavin? I think I deserve to beat Jess too, but I think she might have a strong case to present? I honestly don't even know 100%. I came to this season to play cracked and I did that. I gave my ally an idol at F11 to go for the JUGULAR on someone I was scared of, I idoled an ally at f8, I was part of a 5-5-1-1, i went for BROKE this season and im so proud!! even though I think the jury might definitely hate me kjasldfa. i am proud to end off me playing games for a while on this game hehe
-so love of my life, dream ally RUTHIE WON IMMUNITY. so she is in final four (and if i don't get idol nullified out, i'm set for final four also!!) the goal for tonight is to either idol or just vote out rachael, she is jury queen and so so likeable. then onwards and UPWARDS to final four.
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HI SO UMM I WENT INTO TRIBAL FULLY READY TO VOTE BIRCH AND ACCEPT DEFEAT AND ON A WHIM I SAID WHY NOT AT LEAST SEE IF ALI WILL TIE IT WITH ME AND THEN GAVIN HAS TO MAKE A DECISION AND WE REALLY TIED THAT AND FLIPPED IT AND I AM SAFE AND JESS WENT HOME AND I VOTED OUT THE PERSON THAT WENT HOME AND I HAVE A RESUME NOW ALMOST AND I AM SHAKING BECAUSE I MADE FINAL 5 AND I DONT KNOW HOW BUT I NEED TO WIN IMMUNITY BECAUSE I ACTUALLY HAVE A RESUME NOW AND I AM SO SCARED BECAUSE THIS CHALLENGE IS HARD AND SO WE WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS BUT YEAH I AM SAFE AND THAT IS REALLY COOL AND GAVIN KEPT ME HERE AND ALI AND I VOTED TOGETHER FOR LIKE THE FIRST TIME ALL GAME PRETTY MUCH AND WE WERE THE ONLY 2 VOTES THAT SENT SOMEONE HOME SO LIKE WOWOWOWOWOW
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So I just voted out Jess. The first vote I voted Rachael, and then I voted Jess in the second vote sending her home. I feel really bad about doing it, but she was a huge threat and was going to win. Ugh, it's been like 30 minutes and I already miss her. How could I vote out my closest Ally???? WHO DOES THAT? Oh yeah, Kevin in Tashirojima... no, I'm not salty. But yeah, I feel sad. And Gavin threw a vote on me after talking so much about wanting to make F3 with me and Ruthie! the audacity. 
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this past round was so hard on me and absolutely exposed a huge flaw in my gameplay--my loyal nature and emotional inability to make the necessary move at the right time. i know and knew that in order to have a chance at winning this game, i needed to be at the end with ruthie and birch... and when it came down to it, i had to pick between rachael and jess. arguably my two closest allies in this game and people i would consider friends (i mean i have literally known jess for years). so, to force myself into the position of a tiebreaker vote and having to pick between the two of them was obviously not stellar gameplay... but it happened, so i am just going to have to work with it and make sure ali leaves as soon as he isn't immune and TRY to get into a final 3 with ruthie and birch... but rachael can be there if necessary, she just has no enemies on the jury which is very dangerous. i just know ali cannot be there at the end or he wins hands down. i am really going to have to play up my social games and ability to fly UTR in this game. i haven't gotten any votes yet and have won essentially every "social" challenge... so i think if i play my cards right, i could get a few votes. it will be tough though. but i am not giving up until i am down and out.
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Click HERE to watch the Round 14 + 15 Cast Assessment!
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Episode #10: “Can You Hear My Eyes Rolling Cause They Are” ~ Owen
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I LIVED!!!! Which is good, I'm so glad to be on the side with numbers, that was a good blindside, I'm trying not to feel too bad for Emily since she WROTE MY NAME DOWN. also i wonder who the other vote for me was, i bet it was Cameron so he can play both sides. *EYES* I'm so happy to still be here time to win this challenge! ________________________________________________________________ Also I don't get why Lily is so salty she tried to BLINDSIDE ME
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i didn't switch to lily because im mostly a dumbass. also i didn't want her to be bitter but five minutes later that decision turned out to mean nothing. emily voted ruthie with me, i'm not sure who the third vote was??? could they please stand up im tired of living in the dark. i think lily voted for me (also i love getting votes in my last three tribals it's the only thing that makes me feel relevant). anyways what matters is that i'm here, but i don't know how much longer i'll last at this rate. to be fair i was honest with these ppl about who i was voting for so like...but it's also like if i had better connections i would've known but oh well!! new round new me am i right haha :,)
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If you think I cried a lot in Themyscira, you should see me now. I'm a pro at this point
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LILY'S GONE LILY'S NOT ON JURY CHARLOTTE IS ON JURY I M W I N N I N 
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Ok I know I'm not supposed to be here and "the tribe has spoken" but hold up. Did Lildemort really just quit? Sis put all that Coco Montrese-level work in round after round to get me out JUST to quit when the going got tough? And now CHARLOTTE is getting whisked away to fill the jury spot?
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I can't even. Yes the evil is defeated and good for Charlotte BUT BITCH. Are... are y'all saying... that this is protocol? So like if anything else goes haywire or someone else quits, IM GOING INTO JURY??? I suddenly don't remember unstanning Athena and my PTSD from these seasons is in check again. Athena jury is my true calling and if this is All-Stars and y'all want the most lit jury.... please please please let me fuck it up. I know I know nothing's official and yes this is Charlotte's moment but like
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Ya know you could always do a twistos twist. We don't have to do the same thing twice, someone else quitting and a prejuror coming back. Athena trailblazes and I have been a stellar guinea pig my whole life. Ok so placement! We could be poetic: since I got blindsided 5-2 again, I could be Juror #3 again. OR we could wait a bit and I walk in like 5th or 6th, give my enemies a chance to get there ya know and then I wreak havoc. OR we can be super messy, put me in last, and then everyone will be on the floor deceased. I'm very open minded and down to negotiate. Aaaaalll I'm saying is: if y'all want the drama and the ratings, you know who to call
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Whew it's taking a whole lot out of me to put effort into my social game. Like I'm really drained. Like so incredibly drained. Talking to these people really hurts honestly. It really does. And for some reason, I'm the least upset with Will and Cameron. Cameron specifically, I'm fine with quite honestly. He was the only one that had the courage to message me last night and... it just made me feel better. No one else messaged me. Ali did but I think it was because Cameron messaged him telling him to message me. I feel most betrayed by Ali honestly mkdsmfkacsd I'm really trying to decide my next course of action
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Emily telling me she's the least mad at me and Cameron after the Lily vote is incredible, seeing as we were two of the people pushing the hardest for her to go. Remember that social game everyone said I didn't have in Azores? Here it is now, because I have Emily, Owen, Zach, and Ruthie all spilling tea and taking the fall for me while the rest of the alliance takes the heat. If anything, my ass is safe for at least one more round because Dana put a huge target on herself - not saying that I would EVER want Dana to go, because I feel like we can protect her if she's the target. There are whispers that Duncan's gonna be the next target for his flip-flopping behavior, and Emily might even want to target Owen next. If we let Emily think she has some power after last night, we could steer her right into getting idoled out which would be evil but also incredible. If Owen/Dana/Ali are her public enemies number 1, 2, and 3 right now then... that's perfect for me. A path is opening up towards the end for me, and I really, really love it. Some people don't learn from their mistakes, but it's 2018 and this year is about growth and personal development - I know why I lost Azores, and now I can see how I can win All Stars. ________________________________________________________________ I'm starting to get worried though because I'm realizing I don't think I can beat Cameron in a F3...and I don't like the thought of having to vote him out and I don't think I could beat him in a F4 tiebreaker either...So the next few tribals need to look like this: F11/F10 boot is Duncan/Owen, F9 boot is Emily, F8-F6 is some combination of Ashvika/Ruthie/Zach, then F5 boot is Cameron and F4 would be unanimously Kevin. Like I said, we can let Emily dictate the F11/F10 targets and I think she'd go for those two first, then we can let her think it's one of us going and play an idol to take her out at F9 (and Cameron/myself wouldn't get the heat). Then we have a clear majority at F8 of our 4 plus really...any of the others who wanna keep going. Then at F6, any idols will have to be played so I just need to make sure I don't become a robbed legend. And then F5 will either be 4-1 or 3-2 and Cameron has to go - and I hate hate HATE that but I'm so worried about me being safe at F4 hinging on winning final immunity. But we'll see I guess. If I'm gonna go to the F3 with my alliance, it needs to be with Ali and Dana - because people think they're erratic and floaters. This is how it's gonna have to be though and I can see a path to the end...but it's not an easy path and people are gonna be Mad with a big fat capital M.
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OH HOHO, SO DUNCAN WANTS ME OUT HUH? Well honey, I've got some news for you. One, I have an idol. Two, I have friends in high places. And three? You are not so powerful. I am loved and I am winning this game, and taking the days played record right from your hands. I love you, but you are not taking me down today. 
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Whew I've been a roller coaster of emotions for the past twenty four hours and I've finally calmed down and I feel a lot more woke now. Here are some comments on everyone still in the game. ALI: Ali is a hard one because both Duncan and I feel very betrayed by him. Ali didn't fill Duncan in on the Lily vote, it was someone else that told Duncan. And I thought Duncan and Ali were like spearheading the Duncan vote. And I also told Owen about Ali's idol, but I'll get to that part. I don't think I trust Ali anymore unless he can prove to me otherwise. I've been having a very difficult time talking to him because I do feel incredibly betrayed. What I don't understand is why he thought that I had an idol or Lily had an idol? I didn't. I think he knew that. I told him so many times I just wanted to be informed of what was happening, and I thought a good, trustworthy ally of mine would tell me the truth. But he didn't. Not until 10:00. Which I think is very cowardly. I'm playing with a flock of cowards. ASHVIKA: Honestly I'm really pissed she's in such an... untouchable position? In my eyes, she's been super inactive? Maybe that's wrong, but I've not talked to her much at all. I believe she's in an untouchable position because of her allies. She's got Will, Dana, Zach, Duncan... like people on all sides? And that makes me mad? She's going to make it far and it makes me upset. DANA: Queen of unknowingly telling me that Lily was going last night <3 LOL Dana didn't know that I didn't know Lily was leaving and was straight up with me so that's real cute. I know she's close with Zach and has talked about wanting to work with Zach and I but I don't even know where Zach and I stand... I'll comment on that later in Zach's portion of this confession. I also feel like Dana is in a good position and it's >:( PUT ME IN UR POSITIONS U FUCKS DUNCAN: Duncan I thought was a lot more in on the vote than he actually was, which makes me feel bad about exposing his idol to Owen, but I was just SO MAD!!! I think Duncan is feeling the same way about Ali as I am. He's really hurt that Ali would like... go behind the backs of his close allies like this? And, honestly? It's not smart either? We are the only ones (to my knowledge) that know about Ali's idol? Like? Why would Ali do something like this lmao it's just stupid quite honestly. I'm going to have to figure out what to do moving forward but... I trust Duncan and Ali a whole lot. KEVIN: Tbh king of voting in the minority. I really don't have many feelings on Kevin but I honestly feel bad and I'm really confused why he was left out of the vote last round??? Like omg??? Poor Kevin I feel bad. King of being my secret santa. Cameron: After all of this has happened, I trust Cameron the most. I feel like he is being the most genuine with me and the most sincere about wanting to work with me. I think he's going to be someone I want to work with long term. I'm trying to be as adaptable as possible. And I think Cameron will help me out? Maybe? I just don't want to die this round holy fuck. I trust Cameron a good amount and I'm willing to do whatever he wants me to do this round to keep myself alive. And if this is my last round, it's my last round. I still have lots of friends in the game that'd I'd be happy winning. I'm just really concerned idk OUP AND I'VE JUST BEEN INFORMED BY DUNCAN WHO WAS INFORMED BY ALI THAT Cameron TOLD ALI HE HAS AN IDOL!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK OWEN: Okay. Owen's,,,,, been found the heck out. HE HAS BEEN FOUND THE HECK OUT. Like, y'all. Owen is playing me so hard. And I HAVE BEEN AWARE OF IT TOO. I'VE SEEN IT HAPPENING. AND I'M LIKE. OH THAT'S SKETCHY. HAVE I DONE ANYTHING ABOUT IT? NO! Owen told me he was campaigning hard for Kevin to go and from what I was told by Cameron, Owen was actually campaigning for Lily to go, but saying he didn't want to actually vote for Lily because he wanted to stay in my good graces! And he did the same thing with the Madison vote but voting for Jack and not picking a fucking side! Oh god. I felt so alone last night and when Owen called me, I just let it out. I exposed some tea I probably shouldn't have. But I think I know how I can deal with it? I don't know. I think Duncan is a very likely target this round. If he doesn't use his hideout, he needs to use his idol. Like. He's very likely to go home. And we can idol out a big person if we use it. Whether it's Will, Dana, Ashvika, or Ali I don't care. I want one of them gone. And I think we can do it. I think we need to keep Owen out of that plan though? I don't know what's going to go on. I want Owen gone but I know Duncan doesn't so like... this is going to be a big mess lol RUTHIE: God who the fuck knows honestly. I don't. WILL: I like Will but he's got his own little... posse. And they scare me. Him, Cameron, Ashvika, Dana, Zach, and Ali. And probably Owen, honestly. They fucking......... I won't let them run this game no sir-ee! I don't know how to fix it but fksdfjasd. Also I thought he had an idol but no, Cameron has that. So. Anyways I don't have much to say about Will. I'm fine with him. Don't want him to vote me out. ZACH: I love Zach so so so much and he's a great person but like I have no clue where we stand in the game anymore. Actually i just messaged him a long thing and I think we're all okay. Also I'm gonna submit his and all of my Zach talk is just gonna be the same uWu I love zach so much stuff so like I'm just gonna send it y'all know I love zach already no need to say it again bye
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I AM SO PROUD OF WILL!! Now to figure out what to do.  I really don't want Emily to go and it's simply because she's just too gosh darn likable.  I'm going to try to figure something out with Cameron and Will though and right now they are my saviors, I'll do whatever they want to do but I also really don't want Owen or Zach to leave either. 
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Honestly I don't know what to think. I feel bad because I partially betrayed Emily by knowing Lily was leaving but lying, or failing to tell! Wooh love omission! But I think i've talked with her and i'm sure it's not super fixed but it's a little better. I now have an alliance with Duncan and Ashvika, then my pal Dana. How loyal am I? Well... not a lot. I don't want them to release this information and then by default, i'm the one being voted out because of "betrayal" or whatnot. But i'm not sure who i'd love to see. I guess my ideal people are Kevin, and a little Ruthie/Ali. I like everyone genuinely and i'm upset by Lily's reaction and just overall execution, but I feel like it was a fine move and despite it not being mine, I think Cameron came off as very aggressive and negative and that's going to bite him in the ass I think. But I made jury so HALLELUJAH!! 3/3 in Jury! And also - it's day 100 for me!! AHH!!!
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In reference to last round? "That vote was messy so I’m going to follow suit. It’s open season on everyone’s asses and I’m pissed off and ready to shoot" Thats how i felt after i read what happened and everyone almost omitted me from the vote. According to Will i was left out because i mentioned to emily earlier on in the day that people were throwing lily's name out there. Also i told people i wanted to do lily next round, so people thought i was not going to budge on it and did not bother telling me the vote. What disappointed me though was Ali not coming through and telling me. He really let me down and because of that he's pushed me away. I told him we're fine and that im not mad any more. I mean its true, I'm not mad anymore, IM PISSED!!! So if he can't trust me i can't trust him. I made a finals deal with Ashvika tonight, and told her about ali's idol and Cameron's idol. If loose lips are gonna sink ships i don't want to be aboard the ship, i want to be behind the canon gunning it down. Who says there aren't any pirates on survivor? lol But anyways ashvika and i also made a foursome alliance with zach and dana since we feel like they're a tight duo who are dependable. I really so like the group as people and they're people i've never played with before which makes it even more exciting! Do i want to go to the end with them? Absolutely not! but its a cute group to get through the next couple rounds. I do intend on going to the end with ashvika though. the only person thats been 100 with me the whole game. I do believe she's with me but i need to make sure my other bonds are strong because im not giving anyone the power to obliterate my game. i've learned and I'm finished making mistakes 
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I always align with men and I hate myself
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________________________________________________________________ This FINALLY uploaded. It's from the morning after we merged.
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Hi moms I don't know how i'm voting tonight, which tbh, shouldn't be a shocker to yall. I'm a mess, but I haven't heard my name. Tbh send me on vacation to visit my girl Charlotte. But ideally i'd like to be 4th-5th juror because then i'll be more informed about the game so like let me meme around a little bit longer. Also this is my mood for today On 1/11/18, at 12:16 PM, Dana Barry wrote: > the girl im talking to: what are you up to today? > me: not being stressed out by tribal council in an org
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This is really just my mood (see below) for this round because it's so clear Emily's trying to scramble by not really scrambling and if one of my alliance gets idoled out tonight i'm setting fire to the rain. Sorry that the game isn't going your way queen! I'm the Sarah Lacina and Brad Culpepper to your Sandra, Aubry, and Cirie and this is Game Changers xoxo Emily, 2:21 PM im not used to not knowing whats going on in a game afjsfkjasdklfas
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Okay so I made a video confession and I’ll upload soon but... I’m excited about my new position in the game. I’m bouncing back, I think? I’ve been able to reestablish my relationships with Cameron, Will, Zach, and Ali and I am working on building on with Dana. I’m trying to get on the good side of Cameron & Co.™️ And I think it’s going well? Ali is talking to me and is very uneasy about Duncan. Rightfully so because Duncan is mad at Ali. I also am playing off the exposing-Ali-and-Duncan’s-idols-to-Owen thing off like Duncan was the one that could possibly leak it to Owen, since they’re close. And I think Ali believes it. Unless he already knows I told Owen and like? Idk. But Ali has also told me that he feels weird about Duncan because I am the one that he screwed over, and yet Duncan is the one upset. I’m not upset anymore and I’m moving on. Duncan is not happy. I am just sitting back, spreading subtle information, and getting people to target each other while I cuddle with my cats from afar. I’ve told Will and Cameron both that I am just here to take orders at this point. I don’t want to get in the way of anything. And I have opinions, I just want let them out until someone says them for me first. I’m trying to be agreeable, valuable, and calm this round. OTT Emily is no more. CP Emily is back, okay? She’s here to stay!!! I’m calm. I’m cool. I’m collected. I can do this.
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I told people what I'm thinking today, which means pasta la vista 2 me. Idk i'm not even trying to lie to people but honestly i'm one of those people who is like so manipulative that sometimes I lie to myself and then get confused about what the truth is so wiggy. Does that happen to other people? I'm getting more crackedt by the minute. Who knows how i'm voting. I just want to vote Emily because she's being a problem and messy quen who sent my pms to everyone in the game to exploit me 4 being dumb and gullible. A funky strategy, like exploit me all u want but u probably arent winnin. Also weirdly Duncan thinks votes tonight are going to be on Emily anyway, so like now I can maybe make that happen. I'm a sneaky weasel with the power of a 50% functional brain behind me, aka a WINNER. Earlier today tho I was voting out Duncan though so blegh and also nobody wants to talk to me, which is good leave me alone. I just dont feel like getting voted out yet, sort of, and the other part of me is like bye world i could use some time in solitary confinement. Is that a mood for everyone or just me? I just sent the tribe chat a picture of Owen as a goat idk i like to laugh. This is a rant and she doesn't make sense can someone get jesus to talk to me because she is ignoring my pms too. Also I just signed out of skype so I can calm down and give myself a break from being as upsetting. Ok i'm going to stop writing now gn. 
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https://youtu.be/5PdXIHGvMpk me talking 2 ppl pretending it's cool they left me in the dark anyways i love getting votes 3 tribals in a row. and APPARENTLY according to Cameron i might be receiving votes tonight. exciting! if you're gonna vote for me do it right and take me out you cowards all you're doing is making my skin break out. the alternate options are all from atalaia: ruthie and emily!!! whew!!
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https://tmblrsurvivorextra.tumblr.com/post/169591129951
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“Okay I did eenie meenie minie moe and it landed on ruthie so that’s how I’ll be voting” 
I made myself laugh with that one. If they ain’t going to make a decision, you decide for them
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I truly am channeling my inner Eliza Orlins by being targeted so often. Whew! So turns out Cameron's a snake because Duncan gave me the receipts (well not any receipts actually but I'm trusting his word). APPARENTLY Cameron only told me Emily as a fake target because he was intending to vote for me. Snakes are gonna snake snake snake snake snake. Duncan and others are telling me Ruthie. Im supposed to believe that the tide is turning towards Ruthie but people here have a habit of spewing lies. Duncan just told me to act clueless and stuff or whatever if people approach me about the vote. I don't need to try to act clueless, because I don't know shit!
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You would think that, being immune, I would feel safe, comfortable, happy. No I feel none of the above and I want to scream. I love Cameron but for some reason he won't take a breath and do the easy vote like dude...It doesn't need to be another big blindside or another big move. I'm worried that he's getting a little too confident and feels like he's the one in charge of the alliance, which is not cute at all. I don't want to be mad at him but I'm definitely frustrated, annoyed. My patience? She's being tested. I feel like I need to take a backseat on this one and just let whatever happens happen, because I'm in a good enough place with people that I can pick up the pieces if something horrible happens tonight. Cameron's hardcore overplaying and it's not a good look for him or our alliance if things start to get messy though.
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I’m putting a lot of blind trust into Cameron but he’s the only one lending me enough rope to hold on to. I’m so nervous but I’m trying to stay sane this vote. I was expecting my name to come up tonight, but I wasn’t expecting it to come from Duncan, which is who I’ve been told brought my name up. I’m not playing a winner’s game right now. I’m so nervous and I don’t know how to fix it.
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I love Owen sending me this big paragraph at merge, then telling Duncan I should go from the start of merge and saying how easily playable I am. I love Duncan who I trusted and told _everything_ targetting me for truly no reason, when I actually did attempt to clue him in on the vote. He just wasn't online. He is channelling his bitterness at not being in the loop at me, which is totally unfair. I love Emily who I thought I could trust telling everything about my idol to Owen. I went to her so many times trying to stress how much I valued her. I was the first person to clue her into the vote, I'm just sad. Obviously its just on a game level and I'll find it in my hort to forgive them, but Im so betrayed. So betrayed
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I mean like is it really that bad to want to make a vote go 3-3-3-2? Is that really that ugly?
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HECK OFF DUNCAN LITERALLY. I JUST WANT HIM TO CHOKE. it looks like we might vote Kevin? maybe? or split the vote? idk? this is? awful? help? please?
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Why are Duncan and Owen blowing spoke at me with the efficiency of a chimney? I know Owen wants me to spill info to him and Duncan wants me out so what's up sjsjdkdkd God its so refreshing knowing that everyone is trying to play me hard
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Will won immunity, I knew I wasnt gonna have the time to win this one so that's okay it does make me a bit worried but I dont think that like...it was necessarily beneficial to win it again so soon.
The main thing I'm grapplin with is that information spreads like fire! Emily tells me Ali and Duncan have idols, and that Duncan has a power that can remove him from the game for a round too. Huge yikes. So instantly that's on my mind. I knew Cameron knows about Ali's. I feel like maybe I've typed this before... But either way today I got on call with Will and basically gave him all of this information. And I've been forming a plan to get Duncan to dump an idol, if I tell him that I've been hearing his name! But Will suggested we just leak that Duncan might go to Ashvika.... Which gets messy for me bc if Duncan hears from Ashvika and not me, he won't trust me anymore. but then like...if I tell him I'm hearing his name and then.....nobody votes for him? he'll know why. BUT THEN ALSO LOL Cameron MESSAGES WILL ABOUT DUNCAN'S IDOL AND SUGGESTS DOING SOMETHING TO GET RID OF IT WHILE I'M STILL ON CALL WITH WILL. God this stresses me OUT. If Duncan doesn't waste his idol though it isn't the end of the world, because I do have a possibility of working with him. I just don't want him to idol Kevin. Speaking of, as soon as this round started I knew I wanted Kevin out. That breaks a connection that Duncan and potentially Cameron have, and gives me another round to get closer with Ali, Ruthie, Emily maybe. The call of four seemed good with Kevin, so does Emily, and I told Ruthie about it. Duncan is once again targeting Ruthie instead of Kevin so that's another thing to deal with. GOD. So rn it'll prob be like 8-3 or 4-7 or something but idk..... I want to believe Dana/Will/Cameron won't turn on me, but I can't tell myself I won't turn on them eventually idk. I have been talking to Ali and I think maybe I can sit at the end with him and Ruthie that would be SO GOOD lol. Or with Duncan maybe at the end. But Will, Dana, and Cameron are big risks. I just don't want to fuck them over....ugh. They're prob gonna wanna take me out. This is me 24/7. But I still love all of them rn too. Wow this game is F U N. Idk what I'm gonna do in general or tonight or with Duncan but I'm sure it'll be fun at some point.
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I'm so confused by Duncan. I called him at the swap and told him EVERYTHING. I poured my heart and soul out to him. I said I trusted him all the way and I meant it. Now when he doesn't get clued in on a vote (which is his fault for not messaging me back) he is throwing the baby out with the bath water and just wants me out? Like he said this big thing about how it "hurt him when his number one left him out" which I didn't do, but that's so hypocritical when he now wants me out. I'm trying to not be too like too bitter because I love Duncan but come on.
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Why aren’t there manipulatable straight boys in this game. This is unfair. Who am I supposed to flirt with and get them to take me to the end???? What the fuck
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can u hear my eyes rolling cause they are
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aliI'm about to be idoled out may I rest in peace
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[1/11/18, 9:35:17 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): if I tell u to change the vote last minute do you PROMISE not to tell ANYONE [1/11/18, 9:35:24 PM] Emily: yes [1/11/18, 9:35:33 PM] Emily: give me enough time to make my parchment [1/11/18, 9:35:43 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): How much time is that? 5? ten? [1/11/18, 9:35:46 PM] Emily: please don’t have me throw my vote tho [1/11/18, 9:35:49 PM] Emily: ten? [1/11/18, 9:35:53 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): Ok cool [1/11/18, 9:35:58 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): i won’t have you throw your vote I just [1/11/18, 9:36:05 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): I don’t want someone to find out [1/11/18, 9:36:06 PM] Emily: okay [1/11/18, 9:36:11 PM] Emily: I won’t my lips are sealed [1/11/18, 9:36:20 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): this is me sneakily trying to keep u in the loop [1/11/18, 9:38:25 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): Some ppl just don’t trust you and I want u to know I trust you but idk if its changing yet [1/11/18, 9:38:42 PM] Emily: will this show them im trustworthy? [1/11/18, 9:38:46 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): i think so [1/11/18, 9:38:50 PM] Emily: okay [1/11/18, 9:39:07 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): I love you just pls dont tell ANYONE [1/11/18, 9:39:15 PM] Emily: im not telling anyone [1/11/18, 9:47:21 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): You PROMISE you vote how I say [1/11/18, 9:47:27 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): and you don’t tell ANYONE [1/11/18, 9:47:31 PM] Emily: yes [1/11/18, 9:47:42 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): my allies don’t want me to tell u bc they think you’ll tell owen so its imperitive you don’t okay [1/11/18, 9:47:50 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): im putting my life on the line with you [1/11/18, 9:47:51 PM] Emily: okay [1/11/18, 9:47:56 PM] Emily: i won’t Cameron [1/11/18, 9:48:13 PM] Emily: am i voting owen? [1/11/18, 9:48:29 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): no [1/11/18, 9:48:30 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): You’re not [1/11/18, 9:48:45 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): You’re voting for duncan unless you want to keep it on Kevin in case duncan plays his idol [1/11/18, 9:48:47 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): its up to you [1/11/18, 9:49:23 PM] Emily: okay ill vote duncan [1/11/18, 9:49:42 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): okay just PLEASE don’t tell anyone I told you to vote duncan [1/11/18, 9:49:47 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): IM BEGGING [1/11/18, 9:49:51 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): IT WILL GET ME MRUDERED HBEFJNDMS [1/11/18, 9:50:25 PM] Emily: i voted [1/11/18, 9:50:38 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): pls dont fuck me over emiyl [1/11/18, 9:50:45 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): This is me proving that I trust you and I want to work with you [1/11/18, 9:50:56 PM] Emily: am i supposed to pretend i dont know after the vote is over? [1/11/18, 9:52:27 PM] Emily: thank you so much for clueing me in Cameron i really appreciate it [1/11/18, 9:52:49 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): I love you [1/11/18, 9:52:59 PM] Emily: i love you too [1/11/18, 9:53:40 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Series Admin): And yes pls pretend This is my reasoning for voting for Duncan. I'm doing what it's taking to keep me in the game. I'm putting my trust in Cameron and I'm not sure if I'm making the smartest decision or not, but I'm doing it.
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This was way too chaotic and shows that our four is way less stable than I thought we were. Like this could have been so easy but no everyone had to fREAK THE FUCK OUT like I'm so sorry and I'm so gonna regret saying this in a confessional but I legitimately don't care if Cameron Ali Dana whoever think they're the target of an idol. It does not matter who the target is. We needed to put a vote on Kevin if we were gonna bring Zach in but there was too much fucking chaos in our mess of a 4 person alliance to understand that. Nobody listens to me and it's clear now, especially Cameron. He thinks he's running this game but he's running himself into the ground. I'm sorry but it's just too much.
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If Duncan stands with an idol i'm self-evicting into the sun. 
Duncan becomes the 10th person voted out of Athena All Stars, and the 2nd member of our jury. You can see Duncan’s preseason interview here.
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