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[dragonagitator]

One of the most fun aspects of writing House MD isekai fanfic is imagining introducing 2020s slang to the team:

"okay boomer"

"cope and seethe"

"edgelord"

"BDE"

"cringe"

"this department's PVP game is insane"

What other modern slang should I work in that would initially be incomprehensible to the people of 2004?

It's difficult for me to remember how long a term has been around because I'm so old and so extremely online that my informal speech is an incoherent mishmash of Gen X, Millennial, and Zoomer slang with a few Gen Alphaisms beginning to seep in, plus random Indianisms like "explain me" and "do the needful" that I've picked up from my accounting outsourcing colleagues over the years. So remembering exactly where and when I picked up a particular word or phrase is quite the exercise.

It will also be fun writing scenes in which other characters have started to pick up and spread the slang, including to people my OC has never conversed with herself -- one day she overhears Nurse Jeffrey snap "okay boomer" and she nearly walks into a wall as she suddenly realizes what she's done.

[dragonagitator]

I do believe that Dr. House is genuinely a bit racist and not just saying racist things to get a rise out of people.

House's whole shtick is deducing people's weaknesses and then needling them about them. For everyone else, he chooses personality traits or past actions, but for Foreman it's almost always about Foreman being black. Therefore, House must view Foreman's skin color as some sort of weakness.

I doubt that House even realizes that he's genuinely racist and not just edgy. He's literally a Boomer with the usual Boomer blind spots to their own bullshit.

[dragonagitator]

What do you MEAN Chase was left alone at 15yo to look after his alcoholic mother? What do you mean she died a year later??? If his father has only recently re-entered his life, then what did Chase do after she passed? Was he put into foster care? Did he emancipate himself?? No wonder he ran away to America, what the fuck

[dragonagitator]

Sometimes I see people complaining that House MD is "fatphobic" and I wonder if we're watching the same show.

Yes, Chase says a lot of fatphobic things. But every single time, not only is he wrong about the patient's symptoms being caused by their weight, but his bias against fat people is usually also shown to have compromised his medical judgment and led to worse patient care.

The House MD writers were very clever in that they set up the usual fatphobic arguments by having Chase articulate them, then they demolished those arguments as the episode plays out. Whenever the patient's weight was medically relevant on House MD, it turned out that being overweight was as a symptom of an underlying disease and not itself the cause of their illness.

So many people say "ugh, I had to stop watching that episode" and just go on believing that the show is fatphobic when if they had just watched to the end then they would know it was actually the opposite.

[dragonagitator]

his eyes are so ridiculously blue that it drives me crazy

Imagine this being the first thing you ever properly see💀

[dragonagitator]

Halsinmancers on the latest battle of the sexes

[dragonagitator]

...what the fuck (found via Reddit)

[dragonagitator]

It kills me that there's only one chapter of this: The Worst Thing

"Before communication was cut off – before my hospital fell to the dead – there was talk of an insane genius in New Jersey who had turned his hospital into a fort."

i need more house md zombie fan fiction immediately.

[dragonagitator]

House has canonically watched Mean Girls, too

Mean Girls (2004) House MD (2009)

[dragonagitator]

RIP James Wilson. You would totally be horrified by what we wrote about you and House on the internet.

[dragonagitator]

It’s fine because I’m actually using a secret technique called writing it in my head and nowhere else.

[dragonagitator]

Every time I see that low wall between their office balconies, I want to buy House a set of little ramps like I did for my elderly arthritic cat to help her get on and off furniture.

House is very grumpy-old-cat-coded.

I just know house has ate shit at least once trying to jump that wall to impress his boy-toy

[dragonagitator]

I expect that they talked about all the crazy shit that happened at work that day.

Look at how much all of us have to say to each other about all the crazy shit that happened at their workplace, and it's not even happening to us. They're the ones living it!

besides the fact that the chase/cameron relationship and marriage arc is ridiculous for multiple reasons i'm like girl. what did they even talk about?? they literally have nothing in common except for the fact that they're both blonde and pretty

[dragonagitator]

He’s raised Catholic, he’s a massive whore, he fell in love with a nun, he has mommy and daddy issues, he thinks his boss is god. He wants to fuck god maybe? He’s incredible at bowling, he can hypnotise people, he’s extremely emotional and empathetic, sometimes he literally feels nothing, he killed a dictator, he’s into BDSM, he got paralysed, he claims he’s brooding and mysterious but trauma dumps on EVERYONE at any given moment, he is literally ‘the prodigal son’

He is the moment

[dragonagitator]

these tags killed me:

[dragonagitator]

my proposals for 2024 house md plots

kpop stan slash koreaboo is believed to have deadly cancerous lesions in her lungs before house bursts in at the eleventh hour to declare she's been poisoned by a rare toxic fungus found only in the korean peninsula, which she consumed via contaminated haitai grape candies

a young gamer develops a severe illness which is impossible to diagnose until he confesses to chase that he drank an e-girl's bathwater which he purchased on onlyfans, contracting a bacterial infection

a lamp otherkin gets tungsten poisoning from their collection of antique edison lightbulbs

several college students' lungs are filled with microplastics and the fellows are sent to every vape and weed shop near campus to find out what caused it (high nicotine blue raspberry disposable)

the entire princeton polycule commune comes down with a mysterious illness. foreman insists that the diagnostic team treat them all for std's and send them home. one of the nurses (also a member of the polycule) tells kutner about her landlord cutting corners, leading house to realize that they were all exposed to toxic low-cost paint at a recent orgy

a millionaire's car crash is blamed on his malfunctioning tesla cybertruck but house is not so sure. they discover the man shows signs of lowered brain capacity and, after an mri, the fellows discover lesions on the millionaire's brain and treat him for cancer. he gets worse. house is at his wit's end and cannot figure out what is wrong. after looking at the millionaire's grindset tiktok, house realizes his brain capacity isn't actually affected and he's just an idiot. the lesions are because he has also contracted an infection from onlyfans bathwater.

[dragonagitator]

positive affirmations for the day: i would intrigue doctor house so much with my mystery symptoms and he would insult me in so many different ways