dragonagitator

[dragonagitator]

Yeah, LMD!Davis always weirded me out, too.

I don't think the writers really thought through the implications of that particular bit of fanservice, and it was incongruent with the overall tone of the show. It's silly and cheapens the horror of Izel possessing people in season 6.

Wild to me how season 7 spent all this time with LMD Coulson wrestling with his existence and identity only for them to drop a surprise LMD Davis on us in the last couple of minutes with absolutely no time to consider the ramifications of that

[dragonagitator]

This is great! I'm a huge fan of Coulson-centric fics that showcase his "caring leader" side.

Fic request: There seems to be a dearth of ***IN CHARACTER*** Coulson-centric fics written by people who have actually watched Agents of SHIELD and digested how his character grew and changed over the years.

It's like fandom invented their own characterization to flesh out what little we saw of him in the Phase 1 era movies (2008-2012) and then never ever let that characterization go even as he became a very different character. Because of that, shipping Clint Barton / Phil Coulson is a fanon pairing that has persisted long after we found out Clint had a wife and kids (2015) and only ever heterosexual love interests for human!Coulson (2013-2018).

So here we are 10 years later, and people are still churning out fics in that fanon pairing and thus writing Coulson's character as the type of man whose career was primarily about being the handler for a pair of assassins instead of as the type of man who rebuilt SHIELD from the ground up to be an organization that didn't try to solve every problem with assassinations. Meanwhile, given all the tidbits we learned in AoS about his SHIELD career over the years, he couldn't have been Clint and Natasha's handler for very long because Fury had Coulson running around managing all sorts of special projects (grooming Coulson for leadership), not running a pair of assassins for years and years.

My objection isn't to pairing Coulson with a man. I'm totally fine with writing Coulson as bisexual, but I wish people would pair him with someone he's been shown to be crushing on (Steve Rogers) or has had repeated interactions and obvious on-screen chemistry with (Glenn Talbot) or ANYONE HE EVER ACTUALLY APPEARED ON SCREEN WITH EVER. Or even paired with no one (alone and lonely is very in-character for Coulson) but still the central character of the story and not some minor background character in fic focused on some ship he's not in.

Sorry, I meant this to be a simple fic request for more in-character Coulson-centric fics but then I thought "well I'd better explain what I mean by that" and then 12 years of frustrations poured out of me all at once lol. Coulson is my #1 favorite character in the MCU, but I abandon so many fics a few chapters in because of the awful mischaracterization. :(

I got this lovely request from an anon! I tried my hardest to make this *in character* Coulson so I hope you like it! He’s one of my favourite Agents of Shield characters so I hope I did him justice! Sorry it’s a bit short.

This is my first time posting a fic to tumblr so please bear with me if there are any formatting issues.

Description: Daisy is doubting her abilities as a leader but it’s okay because Coulson is there to give her one of his famous pep talks.

Word Count: 994

Coulson was sitting in his office finishing up some paperwork after a long day when he heard a knock on his door. He knew who it was without asking, only one person who would be coming to see him at this late hour. “Come in Daisy,” he said, looking up from his paperwork. She walked in and closed the door behind her.

“Hey,” Daisy said, walking towards his desk slowly. “How’s the paperwork going?” Coulson put his pen down and sat back in his chair.

“It’s going, but I think we both know that’s not what you came here to talk about,” he answered her, gesturing for her to sit down. “So tell me, what’s on your mind?”

Daisy sighed and looked down, bracing herself before sitting down quickly. “How do you do it?” she asked.

“What, do you mean my general cool and unflappable demeanor, or did you have something more specific in mind?” Coulson asked her. Daisy gave a slight smile at that.

“Not exactly, well, yeah kind of,” she said, clearly nervous.

“Daisy, what’s going on?” he asked, starting to get worried. She inhaled deeply before asking what had been on her mind since before she entered his office.

“I’m in charge of people now. Joey, Elena, Lincoln and I’m… I’m terrified that I’m not a good leader” she explained, fear plain on her face. Coulson felt sympathy shoot through him at the revelation, having experienced something similar himself.

“Well, I’m pretty confident that you are,” he tried to reassure her.

“How can you be so sure of that?” Daisy asked. Coulson took a deep breath, trying to find the right words to help her.

“I get where you’re coming from, I do,” he started. “Look, when Fury gave me control of S.H.I.E.L.D I wasn’t sure that I could do it either. Honestly there are still days where I question if I can.” Daisy looked at him with surprise.

“But you always seem so sure of everything,” she said, causing Coulson to laugh.

“I appreciate that you think that, and I guess my acting is better than I thought,” he said. “But the thing is, I think part of being a good leader is being afraid that you’re doing it wrong.”

“How do you live with that?” she questioned, still unsure of herself.

“I’m not gonna lie to you, it’s hard. I guess you just have to try and always do right by them so that when you make a mistake, and you will make a mistake, they’ll have your back.” Coulson said, seeing so much of himself in Daisy at that moment. “Mistakes are gonna happen, no one can be perfect all the time, god knows I haven’t been. I’ve found the important thing is how you handle those mistakes.”

“You’ve been pretty close to perfect,” she countered. Coulson was silent for a moment before replying to her.

“You don’t think I was terrified when Ward dropped Fitzsimmons into the ocean? You don’t think I blamed myself? I’m responsible for all of you, and when one of you gets hurt, I feel like that’s on me,” he told her, emotion clear in his voice.

“That must be really hard,” Daisy admitted.

“It is,” he agreed. “But I also wouldn’t trade it for anything. I’d rather be the one to have your backs than to have anyone else do it, and if I take that responsibility, it means no one else has to. The reality is, being the leader means doing the hard job, the one that terrifies you more than anything else,” he explained.

“Yeah, that sounds like it sucks,” she replied.

“Oh it does,” he said with a laugh. “But someone has to do it.”

“I guess I would rather be the one looking after them. At least I know I have their best interests at heart,” she admitted.

“See, now you’re starting to get it,” he said with a smile.

“You know, you’re really good at this whole pep talk thing,” Daisy said with a smile of her own.

“I’ve had a lot of practice,” Coulson replied with a shrug. “For what it’s worth, I think you’re doing a great job, Daisy.”

“Thanks Coulson,” she said, his trust in her meaning more than she could say. “It means a lot, coming from you.”

They sat in silence for another moment just looking at each other. Finally, Coulson broke. “Now, did my incredible and rousing speech do the job or am I gonna have to pull something else out of my sleeve?” he asked.

“What else do you have up your sleeve?” Daisy asked, curiosity colouring her voice. Coulson thought about it for a moment, coming up completely empty.

“You know, I have no idea. I was kind of banking on you not choosing that option,” he admitted. Daisy burst out laughing at that.

“As much as I would love to hear you fumble to come up with something, the speech did its job,” she said, standing up from her chair. “Thanks AC,” she said, heading towards the door.

“Anytime,” Coulson told her. “Although, maybe next time we could do this at, you know, not 2am?”

“Hey, you’re the one who’s still awake,” she argued, swinging the door open and backing out slowly with her hands up. “If you didn’t want to be bothered, you shouldn’t have kept your light on.”

“You make a good point,” he acquiesced. “Goodnight Daisy,” he concluded.

“Goodnight Coulson,” Daisy returned, and with that she was gone. As the sound of her footsteps faded, Coulson resumed his paperwork, feeling hope bloom in his chest. He had meant what he said about Daisy being a great leader, and although she still had a lot to learn, he knew she’d be even better than him eventually. One thing was for sure, the future of S.H.I.E.L.D was safe in her’s and the rest of the team’s hands.

[dragonagitator]

someone asked for angsty fic prompts for Agents of SHIELD and I sent them something outlining various signs that human Coulson was obviously deeply depressed his final 2.5-to-3 years of life and how PhiLMD was straight-up suicidal, and I gave myself enough angst from writing that prompt that I'm now IRL crying for the poor guy :(

if I knew how to take screencaps on Disney+ (my screen goes black whenever I try), I'd make a post demonstrating how you can actually watch human Coulson give up on life one outfit at a time over his last few years

[dragonagitator]

Taken from this. It had the right vibes for him lmao.

[dragonagitator]

me with my Skrull boyfriend:

me: *opens up the Bad Dragon catalog*

me: "So, which of these can you do?"

my Skrull boyfriend: o_O

my Skrull boyfriend: "...humans scare me."

[dragonagitator]

Lance thought he was at least second already…

[dragonagitator]

Phil Coulson, why are you not real and in my bed?

[dragonagitator]

don't forget the original MetaFilter comment that started it all when you're handing out awards!

they should do emmys for gifs

[dragonagitator]

a deep dicking from Phil Coulson could fix me

[dragonagitator]

I'm reaching out with a quiet hope in my heart that y'all will stop spamming me.

[dragonagitator]

watching Tony drool into the carpet after being tazed as an adjacent hobby

Gotta love a guy who's consistent in his hobbies

this post is so cursed im so sorry

[dragonagitator]

Taken from this. It had the right vibes for him lmao.

[dragonagitator]

[dragonagitator]

It's the year 2028.

You and your partner decide to walk down to the local coffee shop for a coffee and maybe a pastry or something.

As you're strolling down the sidewalk, you notice a cat across the street. It seems very intent on the seagull perched on the powerline above its head.

"Oh look, a kitty cat!" your partner exclaims. The cat moves in a slow circular motion, slightly adjusting its position relative to the bird.

"Hello, kit --" you start to say, but are startled into silence when the cat's jaws open up wider than should be possible and a giant mass of tentacles shoots up, grabs the seagull, and yanks it back into its mouth.

The cat then closes its jaw and resumes looking and behaving like a normal cat.

Your partner and you exchange a "you saw that too, right?" look.

"Um... have cats always been able to do that?" you ask, cautiously. These days, you can never be sure if you're still in your home reality or if you've accidentally slipped into the one next door.

"No, I think that's new," your partner reassures you.

"Huh. So I guess cats are doing that now, then? Yeah, sure, okay, that might as well be a thing," you sigh, and then grouse under your breath, "Not even the weirdest thing I've seen this month."

"Yeah..." your partner commiserates, then perks up and exclaims, "Hey, I wonder if they'll have those red velvet cupcakes today?!"

Later that night, you Google "when did cats get tentacles" and find a New York Times guest editorial titled "A Betrayal of Trust: Fury's Invasive Species Disaster" written by an exasperated ecologist.

[dragonagitator]

[dragonagitator]

Gotta love a guy who's consistent in his hobbies

this post is so cursed im so sorry

[dragonagitator]

i’ve started watching the mcu for the first time and all i have to say is this