#with la'an and lieutenant kirk it's all very ???

[lenievi]

<3 <3 <3

[blackleatherjacketz]

Find Me After

Kirk x La'an (Strange New Worlds)

Summary: What if Kirk was single when La’an told him about her love affair with his Alternate Self?

Warnings: 18+ Only!, Mature Content, Mutual Pining, Survivor's Guilt, Angst, Longing, Grief, Alcohol, Flirting, Confessions of Love, Kissing, Neck Kissing, Dry Humping, Vaginal Fingering, Finger Sucking, Kirk being his usual slutty self:)

Tags: @bluemoonperegrine @liminal-zone

An entire universe of possibilities flickers in the golden browns of his eyes, blending into olive streaks as he stares at her from across the table. Those deep, earthy tones hold her fast as she tries to convince herself to look away, to look at anything else in her immediate vicinity, but she finds herself helplessly drawn in. Drawn into the same eyes that had longingly studied her face in a world far beyond her own, ones that had once lingered on her lips before he decided to press his against hers. Eyes that will now forever remain shut.

“So what did Sam really do to make you dig through his personnel file, huh?” His smile warms the empty space between them as he takes a sip of whiskey, those lively eyes of his all but twinkling in the dimming lights of the bar.

“Oh, you know Sam,” she reaches for a believable answer to give him as she follows suit, cautiously sipping her espresso martini for a jolt of energy and a bit of liquid courage. “Always pushing the limits of protocol in the name of xenobiology.”

She doesn’t have the heart to tell him that Sam is just as far gone as his own doppelgänger, that both of them are lucky to be alive in this current universe where she gets to enjoy their company in very different ways. That the news that his brother could still be alive in another timeline was enough for him to help her until the very end.

“Nah, that’s typical,” he interrupts her morose thought pattern with a slight, barely noticeable lean forward; but La’an notices everything. “You know, when I asked him about the Enterprise’s chief security officer, the person that I pictured was more gruff, stern and cold…” He pauses his cruel description of her to gently place his hand on top of hers, his half-cocked smirk reminding her of the familiarity he once shared with her. “Not someone nearly as warm and beautiful as you.”

La’an freezes at his touch, his warm fingertips brushing over the fine hair of her knuckles as the space between them grows smaller with his blatant compliment. Is it possible that the instant connection she’d felt with his alternate is somehow still there between them, here and now as the blood rushes to warm her cheeks? Or is she merely projecting her own desires onto this unknowing version of a man she barely knows, a man who only looks like the first person who’s ever seen that side of her?

“You don't mean that.” She leans in just enough to mirror his level of interest, a smile curling at the corner of her lips as her hand happily remains under his. She figures it couldn’t hurt to play into it, after all.

“I’m a Star Fleet officer, Lieutenant,” he reassures her with a wink. “I always say what I mean.” He smiles before swiftly pulling away, leaving her hand cool and empty as he leans back in his chair to take another swig of his drink. “So why don’t you start with the truth.”

“Excuse me?” She leans back in unison, taking offense at his tone before removing her hand from the table.

“So, why don’t you tell me why you really called me that day about Sam’s record,” he prods, a knowing smile crossing his lips, contradicting the consistent warmth of his friendly stare. “I may not always get along with my brother the way that I should, but I know he isn’t one to break protocol or get into trouble.”

He knows. The Jim that she’d gotten close to was always two or three moves ahead of everyone else on the chessboard, constantly thinking his way out of any problem that might come across his path, and saw no reason for this version of him to be any different.

“Lieutenant?” He attempts to bring her back to reality.

Uh-oh, she panics.

This was a mistake. She should have known better than to have tempted fate like this, than to have said anything or brought him here as if nothing had ever happened between the two of them. She should have never thought that she deserved something more than that brief glimmer of hope… than that fleeting flash of love she chose to share with him. She should have known that all she was destined to experience in this life was the heavy grief and painful heartache of survivor’s guilt.

“I should go,” she whispers under her breath, standing up from her seat to disguise her obvious embarrassment.

“Please don’t.” He grabs onto her wrist, eyes wearily aiding him in keeping her near as he silently pleads for her to stay. “You’ll waste a perfectly good martini.” He points to her half finished cocktail with his opposite hand as nearly every eye in the bar begins to watch them, their collective conversations hushed into a dull whisper.

La’an watches his features soften, that mask of performative flirtation seeming to melt away entirely as flashes of the other Kirk, of ‘her Jim’ begin to break through. She takes her time sitting with the obvious discomfort of her crew’s heated glare, weighing the pros and cons of berating him in front of them for touching her in such a flippant manner. They all knew that if any other person had grabbed her like that, they’d have been met with a quick elbow to the nose or shoulder… or something worse. Only he wasn’t any other person.

“You can finish it for me, if you’d like,” she suggests, gingerly taking her arm back from his longing grasp as the crowd slowly begins talking amongst themselves again. “But if you really want to know,” she clears her throat and adjusts the top half of her uniform, pulling it taut down her torso. “Meet me in my quarters in twenty minutes.”

————————-

“So what was so important you couldn’t tell me at the bar, huh?” He waltzes into her personal quarters after she opens the door, turning around to face her once he’s halfway into her living room. “Did Sam tell you about all the bar fights I got into back in the day or…?”

“No,” she cuts him off with a shake of her head. “Nothing like that.” Instead, she points to her coffee table adorned with an ancient tea set, silently inviting him to sit and stay a while.

He follows her gaze over to the couch, nodding before casually sitting down on the stiff sofa with his arm slung across the back rest. “Is there another reason you invited me back to your quarters late at night?” He smirks, “People might talk.”

“Right,” she hadn’t really thought of that. “Well, I just didn’t want anyone else to hear what I’m about to tell you.”

“Okay,” he leans forward with piqued interest. “I’m listening.”

“It’s just that I know you.” She bites the bullet and confesses the bulk of the bitter truth right away, not allowing herself any room for retreat. If she doesn’t tell him how she feels right here and now, she fears that she won't ever be able to do it again.

“Yeah, and now I know you. That’s hardly a good enough reason to invite someone out then leave your guest all alone at the bar after only one drink.” He relaxes a bit and sits back in his seat. “Half of one, actually.”

“No, that’s not what I'm saying.” She follows suit and sits down next to him, his scent somehow more intoxicating at this close proximity. Are those notes of sandalwood and citrus she’s smelling? How had she not noticed those before?

Focus, La’an, focus!

“What I’m trying to say is that I really know you… romantically.” She picks up the handle of the teapot and begins pouring the piping hot liquid into both of their cups, glancing up quickly before setting it down and looking away. “Or at least… a different version of you.”

“A different version of me?” His eyebrows all but disappear into his hairline before falling back down, only to furrow in between his eyes. He swallows hard, scooting in closer with genuine curiosity as she maintains her stoic posture. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”

She nods, mentally urging herself to continue. “I know that I’m supposed to ignore it, to pretend that it never happened, but whenever I see you here on this ship…” She takes the chance to stare into his eyes, ready to be ridiculed, only to be met with solemn understanding. “Whenever you look at me like that, it reminds me of the other version of you and it’s almost the exact same feeling I get when he looked at me on Earth.”

Jim tilts his head before placing his hand onto her knee, holding eye contact as he studies the pieces on the board in front of him, trying to plan out his next move. He allows his thumb to gently rub the inside of her thigh, to change that worried expression on her face into a relaxed smile as it brushes over the dark fabric of her uniform. “Do you like the way I look at you?”

“More than anything,” she confesses in a stifled whisper. “And I know it wasn’t you, but a part of me can’t help but wish that it was.” She takes in a deep breath, turning her body towards him as his knee slowly slides between her thighs, his hand all but guiding her into him. “Look, I know it’s a lot to take in, that it’s unfair to compare you to someone who made me feel so happy and free, but there was an alternate timeline and he…”

Jim’s lips press against hers just as easily as they had before, soft and gentle as the warmth of his kiss intensifies, magically relieving all the tension she held in her neck and shoulders. That faint scent of his cologne mixes in with the hint of whiskey still on his lips as she parts her own to embrace this welcome connection. Somehow all of that grief and sorrow she’s been carrying with her has been lifted, the sensation of his mouth now all she can think about as her hands find their way onto his chest.

“What was that for?” She can’t help but ask as he barely pulls away.

“You were about to tell me the secrets to an alternate timeline,” he pecks at her lips again, an amused smile wrinkling the skin around his eyes as he runs his fingertips over the grooves in her braids. “I’m just trying to save your ass from the time police.”

“Oh, is that right?” She laughs, nudging her nose against his as her hands smooth their way up his neck into his hairline. “You know about the time police?”

“I thought everybody did.” He kisses her again, more fervently this time as his tongue brushes against hers, parting her lips with a more passionate hunger than the other version of him ever had.

La’an allows herself to feel that hunger, too, that need she always heard about but never quite understood until now. It pulses in her core, growing in warmth the more he touches her as he practically breathes new life into her lungs. She inhales this new yet familiar feeling, remembering flashes of it with the other Jim before it increases her desire to taste every inch of him, that primal urge to feel his skin flush against hers. In an attempt to do so, her teeth practically clash against his as she pulls him in even closer, her breath quickening as she feels the shock of his palms against the bare skin beneath her uniform.

“Did the other Me make you feel anything like this?” He shifts his weight so that he’s practically on top of her, his thigh rhythmically rubbing against her needy center as his hands survey every supple peak and valley of her chest beneath the fabric of her shirt.

“Yes,” she gasps as he continues kissing a blissful trail down her jaw and neck, his tongue doing wonders to her sensitive, untouched skin. “I mean no, nothing like this.”

He smirks against her throat as he feels her match the slow, hypnotic rhythm of his knee, thrusting her hips up into him as the sporadic pattern of her breathing eventually mirrors his own.

“How about this?” He slides his hand down the front of her pants and watches her face change, those dark brows of hers knitting together in pleasure as his fingers dip down between her folds before the deafening sound of a hail echoes against the walls, halting his progress.

“LA’AN, YOU’RE NEEDED ON THE BRIDGE.” Una’s authoritative tone brings them out of the moment and into the present as they both hold their breath in unison, looking up at the speaker on the wall. “LA’AN?”

“Yes,” she finally responds as Jim brushes his fingertips over her swollen bud a few times, spreading her growing moisture up and down her length before freeing his hand from her wasteband. She watches him coyly suck her juices off his digits as she attempts to finish communicating with her superior officer, clearing her throat in order to sound more professional. “Yes, I’ll be there soon. Umm… acknowledged!”

“Damnit.” He laughs before his head drops onto her chest with a defeated sigh, his auburn locks now resting against her chin as he listens to the pounding beat of her heart. He smoothes his hands up under her shirt as her back instinctively arches into his embrace, kissing the fabric of her shirt before laying there in silence. He wonders just how lucky his alternate had to have been to find her in an another universe, especially one that ended up bringing them both together in this one, here and now.

“I’d better go,” she sighs, weaving her fingers through his hair as her chest rises and falls in utter disbelief. “Even if I don’t want to.”

“I don’t want you to, either.” He lifts his head to look her over, to really take her in as he caresses her cheek with the back of his knuckles. “But I’m pretty sure Captain Pike would have something to say if he knew I was keeping you.” He leans down to kiss her lips one more time. “Come find me after?”

[arabian-bloodstream]

La'an & Kirk: A Theory

I have a theory about La'an and Kirk!

La'an and Kirk actually first met in their first alternate timeline. In the first season finale, 1x10, "Quality of Mercy," this timeline was created after Pike prevented the death of some Starfleet cadets. La'an transferred from the Operations division to the Command division. She reached the rank of Commander and was assigned to the… wait for it! USS Farragut under, oh yes, the command of Captain James T. Kirk.

So, that is Timeline Number One.

Then in season 02, 2x03, "Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow," La'an is bum-rushed by a man in a business suit who hands her a device and tells her to save the bridge. She goes to the bridge where the captain is James T. Kirk, but it's not her bridge (obviously, no Pike), and he's not the captain of her Enterprise in her universe (again, duh, no Pike). We are now in another alternate timeline. The Vulcans and Romulans and Klingons and everyone hates each other and cats and dogs are all fighting! It's war! War! War!

So, this is Timeline Number Two.

Jim reaches for the device in La'an's hand and activates it and they are transported to Earth 21st century. They steal clothing, play chess, hang out in a hotel room, engage in car chases, visit a new, old friend, save the future, and develop the feels for one another, have a kissy-face, and then Kirk dies before La'an does what she has to do (i.e., letting her evil future ancestor live), and she gets transported back to her timeline. La'an sends a subspace call to Kirk to say 'Hey!' -- as they had never spoken or met prior -- but then is visited by a temporal bigwig who tells her no telling anyone, that's a big no-no!

That be Timeline Number Three.

In the current timeline in which La'an normally occupies, Lieutenant James T. Kirk comes on over to the Enterprise and he and La'an officially meet. Subspace harmonies happen and truths do be spilled in song, so La'an decides to break the big timey-wimey no-no to Kirk before a 17th sea shanty can do the deed. He too feels the connection, but alas, his on again/off again girlfriend is on because she's preggers. So, welps!

And this, folks, is Timeline Number Four.

So, my theory!

Kirk and La'an have now been thrown together in not one, not two, not three, but FOUR different alternate timelines. That's a lot of timelines for two people to be linked together. Now, admittedly, the two in "TATAT" are tied together, but they are still two separate timelines. The kicker is the one from "Quality of Mercy." Another one? Really?! So, yeah. And, it has been pointed out, if you take a gander at her uniform, it looks as if she is not only in command but as if she is his First Officer, his Number One! Uh, yeah.

However, before we dive into that, let's look deeper at the conversation between the real timeline Kirk and La'an which I feel has been misrepresented overall from what I've read. The overall take I've seen is that Kirk and La'an are dunzos because of that convo, and I dunno, I just didn't even remotely get that. Kirk made things very clear, and based on what we know about life in this era, other things can be pretty clearly inferred, and based on what we know from The Wrath of Khan we know other things.

So, let's do some numbering.

Life is complicated.

In other words, the fact that he has a girlfriend who is pregnant is "complicated," not good or happy, but rather "complicated."

She is his "sometimes" girlfriend.

That in and of itself is NEVER how one should describe their significant other. Like EVA!

Carol is intensely dedicated to her job on Starfleet One.

He tends to not stay in one place for long which is a growing problem since Carol is pregnant.

We are putting these two together because Carol is intensely dedicated to her job ON STARFLEET ONE, while Jim tends to NOT STAY IN ONE PLACE LONG. Ie., yeah, it's complicated. This is basically a bright, neon glaring sign that this is a relationship that is not for long. Like at all. (Even if we didn't already know that.)

So, OK, in this era, it's not really easy to get pregnant what with modern technology and medicine, right?

Carol is his "sometimes" girlfriend who ain't leaving Starfleet One, while her "sometimes" boyfriend goes flying all over the place, and she just happens to get preggers? Hmm, OK, then. We know from "The Wrath of Khan" that when David shows up and finds out about Kirk, Kirk, of course already knows, and tells Carol, "I stayed away like YOU wanted me to." Mmhmm!

So, with all that said, I'm speculating that Carol either (a) got herself pregnant to make Kirk stay on Starfleet One or (b) was so busy science'ing up she got preggers. Either way, being pregnant it came down to he needed to make a choice choose her and his kid, or her career and the stars. And Kirk chose his career and the stars. And that is what is going to come out… and La'an will be there through the fall-out because there likely will be fall-out from like Sam, and Kirk just feeling guilty and all that.

But what about the timelines? Well, so my theory is that Kirk and La'an have a relationship, happiness, blah blah blah, while he's on the Farragut, she's on Enterprise, etc., and then as we get near the end of SNW's run, some big choice has to happen. In order to save lives or some such, La'an makes a sacrifice, saving peeps, but in the process, everyone in the current timeline forgets her. Thus, no mention of La'an when they meet Khan, no mention of her and Kirk, or basically just her at all in TOS.

But for her sacrifice, she gets:

TADA!! Timeline Number Five….

In this one, she and Kirk live happily ever after. And her family didn't die at the hands of the Gorn. So on and so forth.

Or maybe this is all just wishful thinking, hahahahaha!

[onwhatcaptain]

Predictions for Star Trek Strange New Worlds S2 E3 "Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow"

Ahead are my predictions for the upcoming Star Trek SNW episode "Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow." Possible spoilers below the line since I am making specific guesses derived from the stills and that one revolving door trailer which was initially bothering me.

I assume that La’an will be meeting Captain Kirk rather than Lieutenant Kirk in this episode. This is an easy guess, because Kirk is visibly wearing a captain’s uniform in the stills. But I also theorize that she will be on some Alternate Universe version of Kirk’s Enterprise that may not actually involve the Federation or Starfleet as we know it. This being a known time travel episode doesn’t preclude it from being an alternate universe episode as well. We see Kirk wearing a non-Starfleet delta (looks more like a pentagon). And that one revolving door trailer was initially bothering me because he says “I’m from space,” as a reason why he doesn’t know how to use a revolving door, which annoyed me. But now I think he said that because he’s from space.

Obviously, our Captain Kirk isn't from space. There's a whole famous line about it in one of the films. The writers know that. Everyone knows that. The audience knows that. So it stands to reason that they were baiting us by putting that in the trailer. Maybe this Kirk is from space. And why not? AOS Kirk is from space, technically. The only real reason he would say he’s from space is because he is. It’s possible he was born there. Maybe Starfleet or the Federation doesn’t exist in his world (or isn’t the one we know and recognize). Maybe Earth was destroyed. Maybe humans have a more militaristic relationship with other species. Maybe humanity went to the stars too early for real progress, or didn’t go into it with the intentions of explorers, but for war.

So maybe Iowa doesn't really exist either—presumably La’an and Kirk return/are forced to go back to 21st century Toronto to prevent this future from being triggered by some event. So maybe revolving doors don't exist where Kirk is from in this timeline. Why would he have seen one if he was born in space? If he'd never lived on Earth at all? If Earth wasn’t even around at all in his time? He says that because in all probability, he is from space. And maybe all humanity knows is a life in the stars. Which is how he would end up in a starship even without the Federation or Earth or whatever is the major consequence of what happens that requires reversing.

I think it would grant the writers great flexibility for a few reasons. First, if La'an falls in love with a Kirk that is similar, but doesn’t really exist, it would be very convenient for the writers. I think we tend to think of Kirk as the main character when we see him, but consider that La’an is the main character and Kirk is “the woman of the week” as TOS has often introduced and left behind.

My take on it is that this AU Kirk will be Edith Keeler’d—this Kirk will be killed off. Maybe not in a literal sense, but he may be aware that his existence will be undone by time or their actions and will go through with it nonetheless. Or even more interesting would be that La’an feels she must sacrifice him, which would be a very intriguing flip on the script, since it’s him normally playing that difficult role of sacrificing others for the greater good. I think it’s quite safe to say that the SNW writers will bank on the popularity of the very famous TOS episode “City on the Edge of Forever,” and require some kind of great sacrifice. And I’ll bet it’s that fixing things undoes him, especially since the audience has a general attachment to this character.

After all, the title of the episode is "Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow." Yes, it's a typical Star Trek time travel title, but it's also taken from Shakespeare's Macbeth, just like the TOS episode titled "All Our Yesterdays" (featuring the main characters trapped in several timeframes of a planet's past). This soliloquy is about the futility of life and the onslaught of time. The idea that the chance of living is snatched from you by the absurdity of the universe, which supports the idea of loss and death.

And when she inevitably sees him again, the real one? It would also explain the brief scene we see in the trailer where La’an sees Kirk (the real one, I assume) and Una says she has a “strange energy” that’s “making her sweat.” I suppose if you met a man, fell in love with him, sacrificed him/saw him killed or undone by time, and then met him again incidentally and he doesn't know who you are, maybe you'd have a bit of strange energy about it. After all, that was a very odd line to convey the idea that La'an is simply attracted to this man she's seeing for the first time.

Second, it allows them to play with continuity a bit while keeping things neat. Suppose whatever happens to alter time is carried out by the Gorn, which we know are a key player this season and we know are actually intelligent aliens and not just xenomorph monsters. Kirk is never aware of the Gorn until the TOS episode “Arena,” but to get around this, it could be possible to make this AU version aware of the Gorn, another alien species, or even a specific person he won’t meet until TOS, because it simply isn’t the same man. Or supposing that this is somehow Khan related—this is a La’an episode, and she could be a focal point which is why it must be her character who time travels to prevent this—and if it’s important to the writers that Kirk can’t know of the name Noonien-Singh until the TOS episode “Space Seed,” it’s perfectly acceptable for him to find out about her family history here. I suspect that there will be a great deal of continuity bending.

Third, it also allows them to keep things very neat if this AU means that whatever organization Kirk represents does not work with other alien species or is outright warring against them, or his Enterprise simply has an all human crew. I don’t think we would see Spock, even briefly, in this episode. I would assume the writers would think giving us an AU Kirk and Spock before the real ones even meet would be spoiling the audience's appetite and taking away the focus from La'an. It would make sense if that organization is enemies with the Vulcans/other species or first contact went very differently.

Finally, assuming all this is right, that La’an is in some AU version where her current timeline has shifted to be Kirk’s Enterprise, I would really like to see them do the following before kicking off the time travel bit. This is not a theory but a bit of easter egg/continuity I’d have written if I were writing the show, and I hope they don’t miss the opportunity.

I don’t think they will introduce any of the other major TOS main crew this early. Ortegas was meant to be the original name of the helmsman on Kirk’s Enterprise from the early pilots Roddenberry was developing. We also know that Kirk's first navigator (Gary) and Pike's current navigator (Jenna) are both called Mitchell. So I would love to see the writers give us a scene where La’an enters the bridge—immediately sees Ortegas, but there's just some ‘random guy’ in the Captain's chair and some other random guy as the navigator, neither of whom she recognizes—is baffled, and asks Ortegas, "Where the hell is Pike, where is Mitchell?" and the navigator interrupts her and says, "I'm Mitchell—but who are you?" I would love to see this because Gary Mitchell is such an underutilized character and it would be such a waste to ignore that parallel. It would also be safe to do so since it would be a delightful little "give" to the audience and would not require the casting of a major original series character, which would be a “big deal” for the story.

Okay, that's all for now (as if that wasn't a long as hell post).

[jennawynn]

Chronotrek SNW to season 2 finale

Wow, I thought I had written at least one other post here. Turns out the show, like Discovery, is interesting enough that I couldn't watch it while working, which meant it was competing with all my other free time goals. Took me a while to get through them all! But I'll be headed to TOS next, which means I'll be able to watch while working again.

2x3 Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow

They really like to use timeline fuckery in Trek, don't they?

I had a realization- this Jim Kirk actor was in Army Wives (he was a soldier who tried to marry the general's 17 year old daughter) and one of the brothers in Vampire Diaries and even though I didn't _consciously_ remember either of those parts, that might have had something to do with why I was not a fan initially.

La'an has to shoulder so much. Survivor of gorn, bearer of her name, temporal agent to protect a genocidal murderer... and she can't talk about a lot of it and has nobody to share the burden with.

2x4

Why does the computer specify "officer's quarters" if everyone is officers? I don't know if you can tell, but this still really bothers me. Like... someone mentioned it's because they all have college degrees and are astronauts, etc., but... lots of enlisted have college degrees. That's not what makes you an officer. And AS a former enlisted, to me, it's 'if you work with your hands, you're enlisted'. If you're an officer, your job is more about either managing people or being the mouthpiece. When I see lieutenants and commanders holding tools it bothers me.

"I'm Erica Ortegas and I fly the ship"

2x5 Charades

It's going to bother me if Spock's mannerisms are treated like they're genetic and not cultural. He's not stilted and his language choices aren't because he has Vulcan blood, but because he has grown up on Vulcan around other Vulcans. Changing his DNA to human wouldnn't change how he acts. /sigh I'm trying to be better about recognizing the difference between storytelling device and realism and when one can be sacrificed for the other.

Amanda looked so different here, I needed to look it up to see if it was the same actress.

Charades? Really?

So by the end of the episode, I decided that they handled the mannerisms better than I had expected.

Demiromantic Nurse Chapel?

2x6

Zombie!Hemmer is fucking terrifying.

2x7? Crossover

The crossover was funny, which bodes well for me enjoying Lower Decks when I get to it in about 17 years. It's _AFTER VOYAGER_.

2x8

Digging M'Benga. He reminds me of a character I built once- a war vet who wanted to help instead of hurt. Except where my character was a True Believer on the Enemy Side who sought his own redemption, M'Benga was corrupted by the violence surrounding him and struggles with the consequences of sticking to your principles. It's very compelling.

The scene with the injured boy really spoke to it- you may have the luxury to sit out the fight and be pacifist, but that only means that someone else will be taking up arms in your absence. If you're a better warrior than most, is it ethical for you to put your weapons down when others will die because you weren't there? People who might not have died had you used your talents?

2x9 Subspace Rhapsody

Musical episode. Just when I was thinking that I was surprised Pike didn't sing his intro, the music was acapella.

Were all the bunny lines references to Buffy?

I like the relationship between Una and La'an.

Why exactly was it a two-person job if they're at the same console? I would have expected 'cross-targeting' to be like triangulating, needing to target from two different locations to better identify the target. Preferably from two SHIPS but at least two locations on the same ship.

I don't really like the way the singing was implemented. It feels like over-studio polished lip sync instead of being organic.

Why would they skew the frequencies like that on the UI panel?? future.

2x10 Hegemony

This one snuck up on me. I didn't realize the season was so short OR that it was over after this.

There was another "My God" that confuses me because I thought ST was post-religion.

Pike was willing to risk everything for Wynnona Earp Batel, but is he willing to do the same for his crew?

Does he feel a little invincible because he 'knows' his future? Is he aware of his Plot Armor? If he tried to kill himself prematurely, would it work? Confusing time stuff.

Anyway, I'm off to TOS. I'm not sure yet how I'll handle when SNW comes back.

[walkingstackofbooks]

SNW 2x06 Lost in Translation thought-stream

Is Kirk in this episode? Exciiite!! :D

Uhura!!!!

"My eyes are technically open, Captain." I love this new confidence, it suits her!

The TOS earpiece :O Yisss

He's fleet captain?! That's quite big, no?

THE SPINNING THINGS!!!! Nacelles? Idk the orange glowy things you always see on the TOS intro are in action and I love it?

Ohhhh, the recording of Hemmer :'(

"I'm sorry. I just said that because he's dead." Pelia I ADORE you

"Which is why they could really use your version of managerial fervour." Hah! That is Very Una.

JEEEZ THAT APPARITION'S TERRIFYING ... WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO HEMMER, SNW?

"Starfleet officers aren't supposed to randomly hallucinate." "You didn't do anything wrong, and there was nothing random about it." M'Benga is so gentle!, I love his bedside manner <3

I feel like Uhura has been in sickbay a lot this season?

"I empathize. But I also know a stubborn patient when I see one. You aren't going back on duty till I'm satisfied you've slept." She look so shocked XD You really shouldn't be that surprised that the doctor is gonna doctor, Uhura!

OH IT'S THE FARRAGUT! THAT'S KIRK'S SHIP!

Am excited to see more of Pelia too!!!!!

Actually, this is the first time we've ever seen Sam and Jim alive together (apart from that AOS deleted scene). Time to make Operation Annihilate more heartbreaking!

"Literally everything in xenoanthropology is new and exciting."

Jim's eye on Spock's chess game makes me so happy, I cannot express how much

"I appreciate the sentiment, but I am not in the market for friends right now." Oh, Nyota

I am so here for Uhura and Kirk on the case together

Pike's little breath and "Lieutenant Kirk". He's so well-adjusted tho

I'm so excited for La'an to run into Kirk again too

Can you find someone else to evaluate if it's real? Oh you did! Yes, Nyota!

No, you're supposed to wait for backup!

The way Jim catches her :o :3 <3 And her panicked "wait!". Oh, my heart. Okay, I love this Jim too, this is our Kirk

Well that's not disturbing at all, Ramon's space disintegration

Pike is so dadly and I love him for it. "The way I see it, that's good news. You're not crazy. Something is affecting you, the same way it affected him. And we're gonna figure out what."

"It won't come to that, I promise you." How can you promise that, Chirs? Take her advice! Let her be safe

Oh La'an ❤️❤️❤️ Just stumbling in on Kirk like that. You poor thing.

"And you have crumbs on your uniform! You're like a space hippie!" Wow, Una XD

"I don't need a cookie." "Okay, now you sound crazy." Kirk's trying to offer food as comfort... I wonder how Tarsus fits into this Jim

"The truth is I've never been able to face death." Oh, Uhura.

I've just realised she was watching that video of Hemmer, even though she must know how to do the thing by now.

"What's the play?" God, Pike's trust in her. That must be such a hard decision, on only that information he's been given.

"You gave me a C!" XD

Ohhh. But it's not really about that. Good. Una's too good o be petty.

I really love being able to see this beginning of Kirk and Uhura's friendship <3

Jim, clearly he'd like you to return with a compliment of your own. 'Xenoanthropology saved the day after all' or something? It's not hard.

Sam! What the heck? I was on your side for a second but I really don't think your brother has anything he needs to apologise for. Are you this much of an ass to anyone else?! (I really can't remember what he did in s1).

SPOCK

A HANDSHAKE!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHH

HER KNOWING SMILE

AHHHH

Oh and as the camera pans away we can see that Jim is constantly looking across to Spock I cannot I cannot I cannot

Oh I ADORED that episode. And not just the ending! Jim fit in seamlessly throughout, it was really nice seeing that in the real timeline, he is our Kirk.

And Uhura is, of course, everything. I love her so much.

[marymoss1971]

Random thoughts on SNW Season 2

Broken Circle

Not a great season premiere. However, I did like the premise of a rogue Klingon/Federation organization trying to Ignite the war again for profit. I also liked that this was Spock's first command. Him stealing the Enterprise was bold, I liked it!

Note--this is the introduction of M'Benga's super drug. I thought the "Performance drug" angle was interesting. I suspected he was using it at the detriment of his health. I feel that would have been a very interesting and timely story. So, I'm disappointed they never went there.

Ad Astra per Aspera

This was my favorite. I LOVE courtroom episode, and this was right up there with my favorite all-time TNG ep "Measure of a Man." This is one of those allegory episodes that Trek does so well! At the time I thought it would've been nice if Pike was the one defending Una since we've seen captains do that. However, given the seriousness of the it does make sense she'd have an actual civil defense attorney.

Plus, it was great seeing Batel as prosecutor! You could see how conflicted she was. She was trying to do her job, a job that in this case she didn't really agree with.

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorow

Time travel episode! I enjoyed this one. I liked that they had the action in Toronto, rather than New York City. That was an interesting change of pace. I loved seeing Kirk too even if it was an alternate universe one. This was a great showcase for La'an. I loved how she dropped her guard around Kirk.

I wasn't completely keen on the "let's push Khan out thirty years. However, I have to admit, it does help the timeline of the WWIII make more sense.

Among the Lotus Eaters

I keep seeing this last among various rankings. I like this one a lot. I'd put it in my top five. I liked the idea of revisiting Rigel VII. I loved the premise of "radiation causes the society to lose their memories" And I really liked the "Starfleet officer, one who used to be a friend, becomes evil" trope with Zach. That's one of my favorite tropes.

I loved that scene where it looked like Pike was going to kill Zach. It just showed how much he almost lost himself without his memory. (Now that I think of it, that moment was a lot like Voy's "The Chute")

And Erica saving the day was awesome!

Charades

This is my least favorite for the year. I really liked "Faces" so you'd think I'd this but no. Maybe because this seemed to be played too much for laughs. The most cringe-worthy part was just the idea that they were going to play charades. Thank GOD that did not happen!!

That said, I did like Christine entreating the aliens (who were amusing) to help because even though all human Spock is easier to relate to, he's just not Spock. I loved seeing T'Pring's parents her father is like the most open-minded Vulcan ever which I love.

Lost in Translation

Uhura saves the day episode! I enjoyed this one. I didn't love it, but I liked it. I liked Sam and Kirk's discussion at the bar. I was good character development for Sam--he hates being overshadowed by his kid brother. I loved that Kirk, a lieutenant commander, treated Uhura, an ensign, like an equal and not a junior officer. That earned him a lot of respect from me.

Pelia and Una were also great. Oh, and the handshake between Kirk and Spock--awesome!!

Those Old Scientists

The crossover episode! This was really fun. I loved that we saw all four lower deckers at the beginning. I love all the fanboying and fangirling. I really loved that Pike, normally unflappable is totally at a loss with Boimler here. All through the episode he's facial expressions are "I can't handle this."

Oh, and my theory was right. Una IS on a recruitment poster for Starfleet! "Hottest first officer in Starfleet history" -- loved that line by Ransom!

Cloak of War

This one i REALLY liked! It was heavy but it was one of those stories that are important to tell. PTSD is such a huge issue among soldiers, and I applaud SNW for tackling it is. You could see Joseph's pain in this one. You see him at that dinner party trying to hold it together while Ra keeps talking about peace and healing. I completely understand Joseph snapping at the end especially when Rah just won't leave him alone.

We got a little more backstory with Ortegas--she saw combat in the war. So, this, "Among the Lotus Eaters" and possibly the finale were the Ortegas development we were promised? It's a start, I guess. But I really think she deserves an entire episode.

Subspace Rhapsody

The musical! The one that I dreaded but ended up loving! I loved that there was a reason for the singing and the characters were aware that they were doing it. To me, that helped ground it in reality. (kind of weird that the effect went all the way to Starbase 1)

I loved the character bits we got here too. Christine's happiness at getting the fellowship, Uhura saving the day, La'an opening up to Kirk, Spock decided to embrace his Vulcan side, the Pike/Batel stuff.

Hegemony

My next to least favorite, but not for the reasons others have. I didn't have issue with the tone of the episode or anything that Pike did. It just felt lackluster to me.

I like the idea of the Gorn as the big bad, but they have to be careful they don't run into "The Arena" which it seems like they're close to doing.

I found the idea of a colony based on 21st century small town model to be really interesting. We've seen colonies like the one in 'Up the Long Ladder" that went without technology, so I thought one founded on 21st century interesting.

I loved seeing Batel. I was certain she was a goner so it's great that I was wrong (at least for now). I loved, loved, loved seeing Scotty! I was taken aback by how young he looked but he's still great!

Pike's stare at the end. I don't think it was supposed to play the way it did. I feel like it was the director's choice to make it into a big dramatic moment leading into the cliffhanger and it failed.

Overall, an enjoyable season but I think Season 1 was much better.

[female-fogbank]

Hi! could you do kirk/la'an in the gym for sexy enterprise bingo?

Not one of my ships...anonny, but for one time only, I did get some inspiration. It's not smut...but it is a little steamy but heartaching... don't hate me 😬

Can be read on AO3 here

La’an took her frustrations out on the punching bag. James T. Kirk was back on the Enterprise, again. It was like time was conspiring with fate to torture her. She couldn’t seem to escape him, and every time she saw him, intrusive memories of 2022 filled her head. Along with her fantasies of what could’ve been. If she were honest, the fantasy was taking her over completely. It didn’t help that he was still a charming and affable man with a soft heart wanting to help others. She could tell if given enough time, he’d burrow under her defences and decimate her. 

Knowing this, she did her very best to avoid him when he was on board. She didn’t want to tempt fate and unravel her timeline or worse break her heart all over again.

“Lieutenant Noonien-Singh,” the very man she’d been trying to not think about and avoid said. James Kirk strolled into the gym with his usual swagger and charm. 

“Lieutenant Kirk, what are you doing here?” She asked in a clipped yet professional tone. She didn’t stop punching the bag before her. She was off duty, he was the first officer of the Farragut, not the Enterprise.

“Thought I’d drop by to see if you’d take me out for that drink you owe me,” He told her, if La’an’s heart wasn’t already pounding from her workout, it would now. She felt his eyes rove her body, it was clear he was interested in more than a drink.

“Look, I think maybe I’ve given you the wrong message,” she told him, she should know as she gave it to him. She kept on looking at him, longingly to recapture the ease of friendship she had in 2022 with his alter.

“I don’t think so,” James said confidently, he grabbed the back collar of his uniform shirt. La’an paused in her workout, her eyes went wide as she caught a glimpse of his rock solid abs as his singlet rode up his trim yet firm body.

“What are you doing?” she asked incredulously, grateful she was already red faced from her workout as she felt her face burn a deeper red. She quickly looked back to the punching bag, she reminded herself that he was not for her.  No matter how many times she imagined what it would be like to sleep with him. She couldn't do it as her emotions were too involved with her ideas of how it would be like. One night stands and flings were reserved for people she would never see again, it made life easier.

“Well, if you won’t drink with me, why don’t we spar?” he asked, he pulled his gold top off and threw it to the side.

“You don’t want to fight me,” La’an told him, she threw another combo of punches and jabs at the bag. 

“I can take a punch,” he assured her, as he rolled his shoulders back and raised his hands up to take a fighting stance. La'an huffed a breath and turned to face him, she remembered his stubbornness, especially when he didn't get his way.

“I’m not sure if you’re aware but I’m an augment, taking a punch from me could literally kill you,” La’an told him, she only sparred with people who were biologically stronger like Spock or were extremely skilled like M’Benga. She already knew just looking at him that James was neither skilled nor strong enough.

“So could a bad batch of Andorian ale, doesn’t stop me from drinking it.” James said. He bent his knees slightly and took an MMA stance that was standard training for all federation officers. “Now, do I have to order you and make it more awkward for us?” he asked her in a light and jovial manner.

“You’re not my XO,” La’an reminded him, she didn’t want to spar with him. Her heart ached as he had no idea how he affected her.

“But as a first officer of a federation ship, I do technically out rank you.” He reminded her, she could see he wasn’t going to take no for an answer. He gestured for her to come at him.

“Are you always this impossible?” She asked.

“I think the word you’re looking for is ‘persistent’ and I didn’t get to where I am by giving up. Now, come on,” he told her, she knew from the glint in his eyes that he wasn’t going to give up and decided to concede.

If they sparred then maybe he would stop harping on about the drink and she can go back pretending she never knew him. Well, technically she still didn’t know him, it was supposed to be easier that way. Just keep up the well-constructed walls around herself, to keep her heart and sanity intact. But it would help if he left her alone.

“Fine, but I want it on record that when, not if…when you end up in medical, that you won’t reprimand me,” La’an told him as they moved to the sparring mat. 

“Scout’s honour, I will take my thrashing like a man,” James said as he held up his three fingers together. 

“You were a boy scout?” La’an asked dryly.

“Shouldn’t you know that, given you accessed my personnel record?” he asked before he gave a charming smile that made her heart skip a beat.  

“Excuse me for being diligent in my duties,” she said as came at him first with a fast but gentle combo which he blocked with ease. She knew she was giving a false sense of security and confidence. But she’d seen how men got when they lost too quickly. 

“I looked into you too,”  James said, he tried to hit back but La’an was faster. She caught his fist and threw him to the ground.

“Why?” she asked, she stepped back as James rolled to his feet.

“Security officer calls me in the middle of the night to ask me a random question that she could easily find in the database. It got my attention,” He told her. 

“Databases are only as good as the people imputing the information,” La’an said, making excuses. She couldn’t tell him the truth and that would always be the problem between them. They danced around each other, throwing punches, dodging them.

“True, but there’s something here. I feel it,” James told her.

“There’s nothing,” she lied. He paused and dropped his guard as he looked at her, really looked at her.

“I don’t know who hurt you in the past, but you have some incredibly high walls on you," He told her, he groaned as La'an hit a hard punch to his side. She wanted to pretend it was an accident but his comment hit too close to home.

“I am the Chief of Security, like you, I have to maintain a professional distance from people to do my job," She told him, she came at him again but with a bit more force than she should have. But James managed to hold his own this time as it seemed like he was feeling out her fighting style. It was a fair turnabout, she realised she underestimated him when he jabbed her in the stomach.

“One would think, you’d feel comfortable relaxing with another senior officer over a drink.” He argued as he threw another punch but she parried it and slid under his arm.

“It’s not just a drink," La'an said, she elbowed him in the gut but before she could throw him to the ground, he kicked out her legs. They toppled to the ground in a heap, he landed on top of her.

“It really is,” he told her, they both looked at each other, breathless and sweaty. The position was too compromising, the way he looked at her, searching her eyes as if trying to decipher her. But even with all the unanswered questions swirling around them, there was a definite pull, that same pull she had spent months trying to ignore. 

“No, it’s never a drink, and I can’t do that,” La’an told him, she tried to shift him, but he grabbed her arms and pinned her down. 

“You know, I'm starting to think there’s something about me. Specifically me, that has you shaken up every time we cross paths. I see the way you look at me. So, what is it?” he demanded in a low voice, he went straight for the throat, metaphorically speaking.

“You remind me of someone I once knew," La'an confessed, she knew she was treading a fine line but she couldn’t lie. She also couldn't be needlessly cruel to him either as it would break her.

“He was…” La'an swallowed as hot unshed tears burned the back of her eyes, “A friend, but maybe in a different life it could’ve been more. He died during the war," she said, she watched his expression soften into one of empathy. She knew he assumed she was talking about the Klingon war, not whatever the hell the temporal agents and the Romulans were doing. She couldn't tell him, couldn't tell anyone, the same rules she kept repeating to herself over and over.

“I'm sorry, but-” He started softly, she cut him off as anger boiled up in her as she knew the speech he was about to give by heart. One didn’t survive the Gorn and endure the Klingon war without being told how death was inevitable. 

“Don’t give me the speech about war, sacrifice and how we all die, how death is inevitable-" she didn't get to finish her tirade or push him off of her. He kissed her, it was electric and yet so achingly familiar like they kissed before. 

When James pulled back, he looked surprised at what passed between them. La'an grabbed his singlet and pulled him back down. She kissed him, wondering if it was a fluke. But it wasn't, her body came alive, she moaned as his tongue smoothed over hers, his hands roamed. She wrapped a hand around the nape of his neck as the kiss deepened, fiery arousal burned through her. She caved into the desires that she'd ignored for too long.

She gave into it. Gave into the fantasy and allowed herself the pleasure of letting go. His kisses, the touch of his hands on her skin were everything. He pushed a leg between her legs and pressed himself against her. The hardness of his erection, his fingers smoothed over skin, pleasure washed through her veins. When his hand slid under her top and squeezed her breast, she woke up from her fantasy, this wasn’t 2022. This was very real, very dangerous, she was willing to risk the consequences. She tore her mouth from his.

“I can’t do this, we can’t do this,” she told him, both were entirely breathless and thoroughly unsated. It wasn't fair but fate had dealt them a cruel hand. 

“Maybe we should, I've never felt anything like this before,” he said. He pressed a tender kiss to her forehead. Just as he was about to kiss her again, La'an shook her head, he pulled back and looked down at her, confused and a little hurt. 

But he respected her boundaries as he pulled his hand out from under her top and rolled off of her. She had to fight not to whimper as she missed the intimate contact of their bodies.

“It won’t end well, I - I just can’t take that risk,” she said, she haphazardly got to her feet. Her heart and body were warring with her mind, it was all too much. She had to leave before she forgot herself again and took what she wanted, damn the consequences.

“La'an, I think your friend of yours... He'd want you to be happy, to let people in which is why I’m not giving up on you or that drink you owe me,” he told her, La’an couldn’t think of a reply so instead she did what she always did with James. She walked away.

[fiadorable]

54 Great Things about Lift Us Where Suffering Cannot Reach

Strange New Worlds season one episode six... yay... so glad we got to this one...

Strange New Worlds | Children of the Comet | Ghosts of Illyria Part 1 & Part 2 | Memento Mori | Spock Amok | Lift Us Where Suffering Cannot Reach | Serene Squall

Pike's impression of La'An is so bad 😂

La'An's security lessons were probably mandatory continuing education for the crew and that's why they all know them and I need fic now of this happening

Combat cruiser has grappling hooks to grab Alora's ship instead of a tractor beam

Enterprise is gigantic compared to the shuttle and the cruiser - I like seeing the size of things in space because it's easy for me to loose track of the scale of the ships

Pike's hair is ridiculous in this episode - too much mousse, my man, too much

Number One is thoroughly enjoying seeing Pike reduced to a bumbling lieutenant and slightly mortified

"Oh, well, it's gold, technically… because I'm captain" 🙄

Attempt #1: Uh this is my Number One

Attempt #2: Una

Attempt #3: Lieu-Lieutanant Commander Una Chin-Riley

Number One manages to keep a straight face as her captain demotes her an entire rank in his attempts to speak coherently in front of a woman (no, I am not interested to know about the discrepancy in the rank stripes on the uniforms or screenshots of the ship's roster)

Rukiya learning about the transporter timer 😭

The Majalis maxim "science, service, sacrifice" is very similar to Pike's in Discovery "service, sacrifice, compassion, and love"

Slow turn by everyone in the ready room when Pike can't turn off the googly eyes

When Pike tells Alora Starfleet requires them to investigate the downed combat cruiser with or without her help, backing up Number One's statement, Number One turns to face Pike and then turns back to Alora like "Told you"

Spock being like "Whaaaat is happening" during the debrief

Everyone is instantly charmed by the First Servant in sickbay

M'Benga realizing the Majalans could cure his daughter

Uhura is 9,000% done with the lessons of security by the time they go investigate the cruiser

Alora blatantly lying No, I don't know what that neural dampening device is

Majalis has pretty architecture if you don't know what's actually going on

The floating agenda Alora's assistant uses is rad if you don't know what's actually going on

Spock would be such a good dad

"That would be an impressive feat [rewiring the biobed to generate a subspace frequency], though Dr. M'Benga might object." … And the First Servant is so proud that the ship's science officer thinks that he is impressive

Oh my god how does nobody fall off the Majalis walkways

Uhura scarfing down lunch and her smirk as Kirk talks a big game and then becomes a shrinking violet when La'An comes over

"I would, but I'm conflict averse?"

Lesson six of security: Know when to bend the rules. Good rule for lots of things

So much empathy for Elder Gamal when M'Benga is expressing his wonder at the quantum bio implants… because this kid probably has those implants not to improve his quality of life, but because he is going to be plugged into a machine that will literally suck the life out of him and those implants will let him be a longer lasting battery

The doors to Alora's quarters are beautiful if you don't know what's actually going on

Pike is such a beefcake under that uniform, damn

"I wonder what ever happened to that Majalan girl who couldn't fly a shuttle"

Uhura is so proud of herself for figuring out the Prospect 7 mystery, and she should be!

Everyone constantly underestimates Uhura when they give her a task and she always delivers in spades - get it, girl!

La'An being a good mentor and telling Uhura to present her work to the captain

Rukiya 😭

The First Servant and Rukiya playing together

Grumpy Pike at having his romantic rendezvous interrupted and Diplomatic Number One politely inviting him to reengage his brain

Mitchell's face when the cruiser explodes after trying to warp out of a tractor beam

Everyone on the bridge is standing to pay respects for the loss of the First Servant during Pike's call to Alora - it's a nice touch

La'An defending Uhura as she presents her evidence that Elder Gamal has been lying

What the fuck is a Mugatan breathing stone - I need answers (never mind, I looked it up and I don't want to know)

Deck 17 is the Enterprise's attic, apparently (why are there so many containers everywhere does the Enterprise not have cargo bays?)

The ascension ceremony top-side is beautiful if you don't know what's actually going on

Damn the brig is huge - everything on this ship is way bigger than I think it will be

Look, given how completely adorable and taken everyone is with the First Servant, I knew the kid was toast the first time I watched this episode, that's just the way fiction works. But every time I watch the scene where they take him down to the chamber and Alora is being all creepy about Pike being allowed in I want to jump into the television and pummel her into the ground. All of which to say, nice acting.

"You're saying there's no way to contact the captain exactly when I need to talk to him?" And Spock looking genuinely afraid as Number One advances on him saying this.

I can't describe how deeply uncomfortable and sad and angry the ascension scene is for me. Which I guess is the point.

They really threw Pike onto Alora's ridiculous circle bed as awkwardly as possible or that's just not a great camera angle

"You're damn right I'm going"

Eerie soundtrack during Pike and Alora's conversation is eerie

"Maybe in the future you'll feel differently." Great line and lot for Pike to think about given their earlier conversation about his future accident

Elder Gamal helping M'Benga develop a treatment for Rukiya, even after his terrible loss

I never have to watch this episode again