#yeah some of these things dont exist in the sw universe

[jswahaarts]

14&27 for the oc asks!

HEHE YESS RAMBLE TIME!!!!(TY FOR ASKING BTW :]]]])

14.) What is something ridiculous they’d impulsively buy?

Cara - a whole cardboard cutout of her favourite anime character!!! Like she’d see it out in the market and beg her master to let her buy it, and through some miracle in the force, she’s able to buy it. She’d put it in her room in the temple and literally constantly get jumpscared by it in the middle of the night if she wakes up but she wouldn’t regret a thing! Her friends would think its really rad too!!

Yaupé - you know those giant fnaf plushies? if those existed in SW he’d buy one of like Monty from security breach- his master Talak would forever be confused as to why he got it, but his friends and the clones in his legion would think its really cool tho!! He’d probably also hug it too and it’d make him feel really happy :]

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27.) What’s the easiest way to get them to laugh?

Yaupé - Show him that gif of the little chewing creature thats claymation and don’t say a word and he’ll laugh his shebs off, he’ll never explain why he finds it funny but he just does

Cara - She’ll say you have to be really funny to get her to laugh but honestly just make a regular show styled my mom joke in Muscle Man’s voice and she’ll cave in- and that video of the milk spilling from that one spongebob episode, she’ll laugh at that too

[caddy-crystal-queen]

So once again, the idiocy of fandoms continues to annoy me...

Yeah this is gonna become a trend on this blog I guess. I'm just sick and tired of this bs. This entitlement, this senseless rage over something that literally does not exist. So which fandom has inspired my ire this time? Surprisingly, not game of thrones. But a fandom with just about the same fucking problems.

Star Wars fans, what the actual fuck is wrong with you?

Dont get me wrong, I love star wars, but I love it in my own way and it doesnt consume my life. I love the characters, the stories, and the potential it has/had. I love the clone wars, I loved Rebels. I love the books. I love the movies, for the most part. Hell I even created my own race within the SW universe.

But dear fucking lord are you all entitled as fuck! Like what the fuck is wrong with everyone? Just because you're a "die hard fan" of something doesnt make you entitled to make demands of the filmmakers, actors, and writers! I know, we're part of what makes them famous but we are not the deciding factor. Ever since the last jedi came out everyone has been uppity and preachy in everyone's faces (if it matters, I liked the Last Jedi, and yes, I do ship Reylo, sue me) about how the series is going bad and this and that shouldnt be happening, Rey's parents should be this person or that one, or kylo ren deserves to die or hes a victim who's done nothing wrong...

I. Am. Sick. Of it.

All of you, shut up. The only thing you're entitled to is your opinion and that's perfectly fine. Any further than that and you're stepping on a thin line. I've seen so called "fans" call for the blacklisting of JJ Abrams just because of how The Rise of Skywalker ended. I've seen people make horrible assumptions about him based on his filmmaking and the supposed message his movies send. I've literally seen people call for this mans blood just because you didnt get the fucking ending YOU FELT ENTITLED TO!

"Well kylo ren was an abuse victim and he didnt do anything wrong! He deserved better! We fans deserved better!".

Dude...you are calling for the blood of a man who's crime was literally DOING HIS JOB! If the abuse of a fictional character pisses you off this much, first off please get some help. Second off, why not focus that anger on, well, gee, I dont know, how about real living victims of abuse?! I'm pretty sure there would be fewer victims of abuse in the world!

You all bitch piss and moan about the death of an abused fictional character, yet you didnt mind abusing the poor kid who played Anakin in the Phantom Menace! You have no room whatsoever to talk, Star Wars Fandom, not a single damn one of you do! You also had no issue with nearly driving the poor man who played jar jar binks to suicide! Fuck off, and stop the hypocrisy you dumb bastards! You're no fucking better than the director you claim to hate so goddamn much!

When TROS came out, it was like all the kylo ren fangirls were talking about being forced to watch A Serbian Film or something. Dear fucking god...I'm a reylo but you guys just need to shut up! It is NOT that serious! It's a fucking movie! Again, maybe you can focus that anger on real problems and real victims, rather than becoming the abusers you claim to hate so much!

But no let's just waste all our time effort and energy on a fictional character right?

Stop being entitled, stop calling for the deaths of JJ Abrams and Rian Johnson. Stop assuming they're bad parents based on their writing/filmmaking. Stop treating fictional characters like they're real, because newsflash, they arent! The world is going to shit and we need people to be angry, but we need them to be angry at the right things and the right people. Not on people who were simply doing their jobs and committing to their passions, but real life abusers! All abusers!

All of you get your heads out of your asses and start turning your ire towards people who fucking deserve it! Thank you!

[niennavalier]

Okay, belated Star Wars thoughts under the cut; no particular order, just as I think of them. Possibly some unpopular opinions, I dont really know, I'm not all that active in the SW fandom. So maybe I'll get roasted alive but...eh, whatever, this site is somewhere between an void and hell anyway.

Also SPOILERS BELOW (OBVIOUSLY)

[[MORE]]

Okay, so first things first: I enjoyed episode 9. A lot. It was really fun to watch, and just talking in terms of my experience in the theater, it was fantastic. It was so much fun to see the old crew back, all of those appearances were basically like happiness shots in the arm. It was really very cool. The Palpatine reveal and everything around it was pretty damn epic for the obvious reasons. And I absolutely loved seeing the trio bantering and arguing and passing each other - I always love stuff like that. I swear, just give me hours of good character interaction and I'll be happy. Kylo and Rey fighting together/him using the blue lightsaber was also some cool shit and basically like "yaasss heres the payoff for the entire trilogy let's fucking gooo"

Oh, and I need to mention that little droid that Rey fixes. That little guy was adorable and I want merch for him and I will not hear otherwise. (The droids are always great in all the movies fight me)

Also Zorii and Jannah. Badasses, loved watching them and the way they got to interact with the main cast. Just...wanna spill all the love for them in this sentence.

But there are a lot of other things I have to say about the movie - especially the more I think about it and the trilogy as a whole. Dont get me wrong; I still really loved watching the movie. There are just...certain things that feel like missteps or missed opportunities?

(Not counting how badly Oscar Isaac wanted Finn and Poe to be boyfriends, which I just discovered is a thing. And reminds me a lot of anytime anyone mentions Julian Bashir to Andy Robinson and his response is always "oh Garak wanted to have sex with him from the start". Which I literally love so much, this man is a treasure, and I'm glad that apparently the same thing is happening here. And it's not that I'm not gonna talk about it here cause I dont think Poe and Finn should've been boyfriends, but I'm pretty sure Oscar Isaac has much more to say about it than I do)

Gonna start where I always start when I have problems with writing: romance. Because IMO badly written/unnecessary romance can ruin any good story real quick. I'm talking about the kiss at the end. I'm not saying this to bash on the Rey and Kylo shippers. Generally, I dont care what you ship so long as you dont start harassing everyone else; I care even less when it comes to this fandom cause I just participate in it so little. So this isnt me bashing on the ship itself or the fans, but I just think that, in the context of the movie itself, the romance was really poorly handled. To the point that I saw the scene going that way and all I could think was "oh god please dont kiss, I'm begging you". And well...we all know where that went. But I just never got a romantic vibe from the two of them in terms of what was shown on screen. The chemistry always felt familial, at least to me, across episodes 8 and 9 in particular. I dont know if that's just the chemistry between the actors or what, but the tension between them never struck me as romantic - more like two people desperate for someone who understands the chaos around them, not lovers.

Again, granted, maybe that's just the way I read stuff, especially considering I really appreciate movies that don't feature romance arcs. I'm not sure how it read to other people, and I'm not gonna bash on the shippers who like it. I may feel like JJ Abrams didnt write a convincing romance - or just stuck the kiss in there at the end to fulfill some plan from episode 7 that didnt actually pan out - but I have no problem with the ship itself, or the people who ship it. (Because at the end of the day, this is all fiction, and I couldnt care less how anyone chooses to interact with it)

(And this isnt an entirely rated point but because I've seen it around:

In all honesty, I'm starting to think that the romance thing was just a symptom of a bigger problem with this trilogy: it doesnt feel cohesive. It's like JJ Abrams and Rian Johnson had two separate sets of notes and just refused to actually look between them. Two separate sets of ideas that they were too stubborn to compromise on.

And I have a feeling (at least, talking to my little brother, who definitely feels this way) that a lot of people are pinning this fragmented feel to the trilogy on Rian Johnson and The Last Jedi, but I honestly don't think that's fair. Because, and here's the unpopular opinion: I really don't think Last Jedi is that bad. At least, not bad enough to deserve all the flak it gets.

Won't get into that entirely here because that could be a whole separate post, but that's my opinion. Sure, it's not perfect, there are definitely a lot of parts that are pretty irrelevant and not really necessary, but that's true of everything. Frankly, its biggest problem was that it was written for the wrong audience. Which is a major problem, yes, but taken for what it is, it's perfectly decent. As I said before, I could write a whole thing on this movie and why it's not that bad (because I have my brother's points as to why it's terrible for me to argue against) but overall, my reading of 8 is that it's a movie meant to introduce wider ideas and concepts to the universe - particularly this very gray and murky area of morality and character - through stories that are closer to the characters and tied to harsher realities of war. Things aren't always black and white, people are complex, sometimes our heroes can be gravely wrong in ways that aren't glamorous.

Frankly, it feels somewhere between a super deep indie movie and Star Trek (particularly DS9, at least to me, because I love when that show gets to twisty moral stuff). So yeah, wrong audience, yet he decided to stick with his storytelling despite that. No matter I personally might fall into the audience that movie resonates with, it wasnt gonna resonate with most of the fandon.

Again, Last Jedi is far from perfect in other ways too, but it sets up some great ideas that I was really hoping to get some closure on. Honorable mention here is when Rose saves Finn when he's speeding out to sacrifice himself and because of the desire to save the people they love, which I always end up likening to the "we dont trade lives" sentiment. Mentioning this cause my brother always complains about it, but I was thinking this would be one of those virtues that separate the good guys from the bad guys and ultimately allow good to triumph. Yknow, sorta like how Voldemort's lack of understanding of love contributed to his downfall, to liken it to HP. I was under the assumption that would be the concept at some turning point in the climax, but...guess not.

Big one though, which was actually a pretty big disappointment IMO, was the whole neutrality argument, the existence of a grey area. The most interesting thing from Rey and Kylo's scenes in 8 was the notion that the Jedi and Sith could be left to die, and the two of them would essentially find a way separate from those two sides, walking a path down the middle. I know I'm not the first person to bring this up, especially because of how the Force just...works. That the scales need to be balanced. And so, given that, to have the Jedi always destroy the Sith - that's not balance. Give it a few more years and the same problem is gonna happen; if there are Jedi, there will be Sith and war is gonna break out. That's hardly resolution, so neutrality is the way to go. And, personal opinion - I loved that this ended up in 8. It's just a lot more nuanced than "good vs evil, good is victorious" and brought in new ideas to this universe that I really wanted to see explored.

But that just...never happened. Sure, Rey has that yellow lightsaber at the end, but it's really very little more than the barest hint of lip service to that entire concept. Because it's never built on throughout the movie. Kylo's insistence that they look for a different way turns into a demand that she basically become his Sith queen. Which isnt playing with the gray area - it's more firmly dividing light and dark. And as she's fighting Palpatine, he's all the Sith, while she's all the Jedi; doubt that needs further explanation. Sure yeah, she's dealing with the revelation of her bloodline throughout the movie, but that interaction with the dark side is very different than in 8; she's afraid of it (a character arc I love, dont get me wrong), not lured by it. The Sith are very clearly evil, and despite her family, she comes to embody the Jedi as a whole. The opposite of what was laid out in 8.

Which actually just makes her choice to take the yellow lightsaber make even less sense? Because...she has no reason at all to turn away from the Jedi and every reason to keep using the Light side. The only possible reason by that point is if she knows about the balance and makes that choice intentionally to prevent the rise of a Sith lord. But that choice is never shown, so I dont give that a pass. It just feels like the lamest nod to something from 8 - no buildup, no explanation, just there because it technically should be.

And that fucking sucks. What a waste. Puts so much space between these movies.

The romance might be another aspect of that - 8 didnt really give me a strong romantic vibe, and then 9 tried to benefit off of buildup of romantic tension that just wasnt there. And that romance isnt the only other one. Just the existence of Palpatine at all? Like, awesome plot yes, but not at all foreshadowed. The banter between the trio at the start? One of my favorite parts to watch, but it comes out of nowhere, and I guess we just have to live with the idea that all of the development happened off screen. Lame. The return of the fucking helmet? Fuck, i actually have more i can say about the way i interpreted the helmet, but this is getting long. So point being: it's like we just got zipped right back to episode 7 all of a sudden and didnt even get a symbolic moment of him losing the helmet in 9 (at least, not that I remember).

Really, on the whole, JJ Abrams basically did the beginning of 9 such that most of 8 could be made irrelevant. Because that's how I felt throughout the whole movie; like 8 didnt matter. And I know a lot of fans are honestly happy with that (so maybe if was actually the right choice on that front) but god does it make the whole trilogy clunky. Literally nothing flows.

And I think that's my main problem with the trilogy as a whole - or, rather, with the production behind it. It's like JJ Abrams and Rian Johnson were just so goddamned married to their ideas that they wouldnt budge from the story they wanted to tell. Like they put their individual creative visions above the quality of the story as a whole. Like they weren't willing to deal with any changes that they didn't put into play themselves. And the trilogy suffered for it.

Which is really so obnoxious to me. Because it is very possible to be flexible and improv and incorporate other ideas into what you already had; just look at D&D. That's the job of a DM. You can plan everything out perfectly, figure out the story you want to tell, decide how you want everyone to interact with your world, but the players will invariably fuck those plans over. And you just have to roll with the punches. But beyond that, those changes can be for the better, because those are ideas you never thought of, and incorporating those makes for an even richer story than anyone expected. All because the people involved are willing to see where the story naturally takes itself.

Just wish these directors could understand that.

(Also...what was Finn gonna tell Rey? I mean...? This is honestly the strangest thing about the movie because it literally felt like the writers just...forgot they ever had this plot point after halfway. Which just feels like sloppy writing, and I feel Poe when he seems to be really curious what Finn wants to tell Rey. Because...me too!)

[kadywicker]

spoilery pros/cons list under the cut!

cons first

my biggest issue w/this movie was finn and poes plots. while they do get abt the same amount of screentime as rey smth just feels... very empty. poes plot is esp ooc and finns just... idk how to describe it other than empty? it left a lot to be desired 

the humor was weird??? like? sw is humorous yes but... it was very different. not in a good way. like yeah i snorted with the whole “i’m holding for hux” thing from poe bc i hate hux and that was a big mood but it felt very off for the film/universe. as did luke throwing the lightsaber. and some other moments i dont rlly remember

kylo ren shirtless scene was literally awful and as a lesbian i wanted to kms

holdo was??? so fuckin pointless oh my fuck literally every time she was on screen i just literally did not care

yoda being there what the fuc gk

kylo being a fucking dumbass and not wondering how luke got a lightsaber when he literally just broke the thing in half but ig it’s p in character for kylo ren to not think for once in his life

the times that finn/poe were put in harmful situations played for laughs. like.... yes, the same happened to rey too but it has much different vibes when its moc being targeted. intentional or not it was a bad call and just made me incredibly uncomfortable

paige dying :(

pros !

shockingly bc i think im the first person to say this, luke’s characterization. the main complaints have been: a) regretted not killing vader b) considered/tried to kill kylo c) too cynical. now as someone whos a certified Luke Stan im gonna debunk these bc every one of those is down to misinterpretation or misquoting of scenes. a) he never said he regretted saving his father. in fact, he still has his kyber crystal from his saber hanging on a necklace in his hut. the conversation went like this. “the jedi have done awful things etc etc they created vader” “and you saved him” luke is not the one listing saving him as a mistake of the jedi. it’s rey countering that luke saving him was smth good the jedi did. and luke DOESN’T disagree. his only argument is that he regrets that it made him a “legend” which in turn lead to him being blinded to how dark kylo had gotten. which is honestly perfectly in character for luke. only he would feel bad for smth like that and beat himself up over it bc as usual hes a sunshine boy b) also didnt happen. when we see the scene from kylos pov, he mistells rey the story to make it seem like luke was some evil vengeful master. nope. he literally ignited his lightsaber for like 2 seconds bc he saw how many ppl kylo was going to kill before he realized what he was doing and went to turn off his saber but kylo had already seen. it’s also made clear later that while hes sorry abt what happened (which, cmon, this is luke. him feeling bad abt shit isnt an indication that its villainized. he apologized to an alien that didnt like him in anh) that he knows he was right and that kylo doesnt have good in him anymore. kylo was still the one who destroyed the order. rey was never mad at luke for trying to kill kylo simply for the sake that she felt “bad” for kylo. she was pissed that, from the distorted version kylo showed her, it seemed as if he’d “created” kylo who’d killed so many ppl.  c) okay yes hes cynical. but he doesnt stay that way. look. what have we seen from luke in the ot? we’ve seen him feel guilty over goddamn everything always and try and be a self sacrificing dumbass every second bc of that (i mean this in a very fond way i love my son). so when he blames himself for this shit, he tries to hide himself away so he doesnt fuck things up. we cant forget that while luke was a softhearted, emotional hero, he also had a lot of moments where he was cynical or annoyed (all of anh, dagobah, points in rotj). still, he overcomes that and realizes that he CAN still help and that the jedi are still needed. he talks about hope and is his same sweet self to leia and everyone else in the resistance. he also does have his sweet moments with rey.

moving on tho. holy shit the blatant parallels they drew with luke & leia and rey & kylo more than ever convinced me that they’re either siblings or cousins. him leading her into an answer of her parents being nobodies when shes already told him thats her biggest fear definitely isnt a concrete answer. like. they literally create the same scenes between rey & kylo and luke & leia. the weird ass hand scene thats been floating around also happens between luke and leia via the force. luke and leia communicate via the force more than once in the same way rey and kylo do. rey leaves in nearly the exact same manner to go to kylo as luke did when leaving dagobah to save leia. rey and leia also feel luke die via the force and they both see him in the same way rey & kylo and luke & leia have been seeing each other. if this were just a bond by snoke, that bond wouldnt exist between rey & luke & leia as well. i’m just saying y’all. luke was told his entire life growing up that his parents were nobodies and it’s stated outright in anh and yet look @ where we are now lads

rose was such a sweetie?? i didn’t love her introduction for reasons i’m sure youve all read by now but the rest of the movie she was a rlly good character and that hope sw is always about.

finn is called a hero who knows right from wrong and fights for whats right. finn is also given so many hero moments in the movie that got everyone in the theater cheering. he kills phasma. also, although dj does try and sell the whole “the rebels are just as bad as the first order” bullshit, finn calls him on it and fully proves just how bullshit that is. it’s definitely not the message of the movie.

finn and reys reunion oh gm yg od. that was so SWEET. she buried her face in his neck and he nuzzled her hair and they were both smiling and clinging to each other it was real blessed. rey also keeps asking abt finn and finn keeps asking abt her and honestly i feel god in this chilis tonight

the only good thing kyle did in this movie was force throw hux against a wall and knock him out bc hes annoying and i might hate kyle but god what a big goddamn mood

kylos irredeemable and stated to be so by the end and u kno what? thank fucking god

yes luke dying sucked and as a luke stan im gonna live in denial forever but if theres any way luke skywalker would go out itd be sacrificing himself for everyone he loves so 

[johnnythirteenguns]

Unworthy Thor #5 (Final Issue)

okay i am heavily biased in favor of jane and i know that it isnt entirely altruistic in nature. it comes from hating thor stans and the whole fandom ring they run around in (that one ship), it comes from constantly having to justify why Thor is important, why her book matters outside of a political context (it’s good, it hearkens back to old school thor). I wish it were a little more tightly written (although as of the last issue i have to grudgingly accept that aaron probably has more of a handle on things than it readily appears), but i love The Mighty Thor.

my feelings about the odinson ping pong all over the place and i dont really know how i feel about him, or more importantly, if i still want to give a shit about him. i think i can still dredge up a lot of affection, but it’s inconsistent.

that being said:

initially i thought i hadnt read #4 but i definitely did, because upon opening it i realized i remembered seeing all of it but had absorbed exactly none of it. i put it down and just went to #5 anyway

um..... which nick fury is this

me, hissing violently: who cares if you whispered and the odinson got the sads for a bit jane is thor now and we’re good it’s cool man stop lamenting shit that turned out pretty okay

(thats mean, maybe)

aww the layout with all the thors got me a bit. oh bub

yeah wow okay coipels art is second to absolutely none just wow. the Emotion. it’s so evocative. i love it.

i love how thori is a big pitbull or.... um maybe some kind of mastiff/bull terrier lookin critter? anyway since when does he call anyone “master” or did i miss something. why didnt he run straight back to leah.

it’s because the odinson is letting him murder stuff okay fine but he really should be getting home to brooklyn :c

okay so like what... Is It about the fucking magic hammers in these fucking universes that people dont understand. you cant lift it proxima unless you take the whole fucking planet collection antique store with you. you cant lift it collector, you’re an asshole. what is it about the rules you just dont get

bye bye!

when did proxima grow that hair did i miss that what

BITCH

B I. CT. H

i was wondering where the fuck she went

holy shit she just. smoked them. wow. damn okay.

oh...... okay.

yeah wow he’s purple. um.

i cant say im 1) surprised or 2) surprised, seeing as i was always wondering where the line between Death and Hela was drawn.

this is making me uncomfortable he’s like a sentient lego block and also terrifying btu not in a good way so im like. she’s Bold

OOOOOOOOOOH I SEEE. YEAH. OH WOW I LIKE THIS. oh thats a good reason. cool. im cool with this. i wanna chew on this.

thori go HOME you SHITTY DOG

swhsgsshghfdghf im sorry i cant take “War Thor” seriously

okay cool, that was good. as a whole this was a really solid limited. i am 100% content and satisfied with The Whisper, i think this is definitely in league with what i wanted it to be. i can only assume this new guy at the end of the book will get his own ongoing or Definitely show up to be a player i nthe war of the realms before he gets his own ongoing which. sure. i havent read any ultimates thor yet so i cant speak to that aside from the SW Thors series.

i am. grudgingly but slightly less grudgingly admit that i do still really love thor. i wish bill was snootier. i am gonna happily assume they sleep in a happy pile with their GARBAGE PET, who has ANOTHER MASTER WHO IS IN COLLEGE AND COULD USE SOME OF HIS GODAWFUL SUPPORT.

oh well.

Yeah, and as a final note: I know that Thor Odinson has long been referring to Bill as hsi brother, that Odin deemed him such, that he’s more than earned that tite. Although this was really brief and I don’t have much context, Bill is honestly the perfect sibling for Thor. I want  Odinson and Loki to continue existing apart from each other, to get still more space, perhaps more time to heal, before attempting to 1) cave each others’ heads in 2) come to terms with the fact that they are never gonna be good family to each other, but they can be civil family to each other. This is more Odinson’s problem than Loki’s at this point.