#your honor i'm bisexual it's not my fault

[bengiyo]

Theory of Love Rewatch Ep 1 Stray Thoughts

This rewatch is sponsored by @lurkingshan. Shan has the rare honor of being the only straight white person to respect my tastes in the last 15 years and successfully convince me to watch two things that I went on to enjoy immensely. She convinced me to try Coffee Prince when I was willing to engage with kdrama and pushed me over the episode 10 slump. She also convinced me to watch the Pornographer series again, which I found essential. I've given her coupons to use to recommend things to me, and she's chosen to make me reengage with Theory of Love.

I didn't walk away from this show feeling great about it or myself in 2019. I identified with Third a lot, and also hated their entire friend group. I also thought Earth and White went to waste in BL again (I watched Water Boyy the series). So we're going into this on shaky ground. I kindly ask that you not argue with me in my notes about why you love this show.

Let's get started.

Right away I am reminded that I am not immune to Gun Atthaphan mooning over classic romance films that his character has protected way too much into.

Khai choosing to not mess around with folks in his faculty is a pretty good boundary for a player.

So, it's not Khai's fault that Third fell in love with him. Still, I understand the stress and angst of crushing on a straight boy who loves you platonically. Coming out is not easy, especially when you're one of the boys.

Okay, Third pouring a bottle of water over his head to be dramatic is too much. He is unwell.

Gun having second billing on this show is homophobic.

Ep 01: Best Friends

I wonder if Gun wants to produce and direct.

That line about having hundreds of girls if not for Khai feels kinda funny. Like are you gay, sir?

Goddamn this GETSUNOVA song still fucking slaps.

I forgot how this seaweed snack kept the lights on through Bad Buddy.

12,000 baht to see Blackpink? Couldn't be me.

I don't feel bad for Third about these tickets. He said no to getting them, so Khai isn't a dick for getting them from a scalper.

This is extremely tacky of Khai to start shit at someone's screening like this.

They curb stomped Khai for that behavior. You love to see an instant comeuppance.

Okay, but sending Third to reject Milk is clearly his specialty.

I wanted to know what they said about the Toy Story trilogy, especially since Khai did a Vulcan salute.

Third has a Winnie the Pooh, Astro Boy, and Chucky doll in his room. I have questions.

Khai ditching Third on a lie isn't cool and also feels unnecessary since he canceled on Third for a girl earlier. Is it because it was Milk?

Okay, but Khai is also right that he didn't tell Third to throw her shit away.

Ah, Two finds him at the end of the episode to try and keep Third invested.

This show is very different for me in 2023, because now that I'm older I'm doing what I can. I'm not trapped in a spiral frustrated and pining after a guy I struggled to get over. My living situation is also different. There's also so much more BL better suited to my tastes. Me reading Gun a certain way doesn't cover for Third the way it did in 2019, so his bisexual angst about the girls he hasn't scored because of Khai doesn't track as sympathetic this time. I'm also struggling to see what holds Third to Khai. He's just like most dudes I know. Sometimes he's a good bro and recognizes your efforts when you do something he asked for, but they never notice what you do that they didn't ask for.

It'll be interesting continuing this watch, because I've never been an OffGun girlie, and now that I've projected my gay angst into other projects I feel less connected to Third. Now I'm just frustrated for him and also a little irritated.

[heirscrchd]

serious ask:

do you think azula met a/a few trans women during her time post atla?? what would her thoughts be??

(disclaimer: anon is trans)

Okay I'm going to be forward here, I don't know a lot about the subject of being Trans.

Identity for me is extremely difficult and while I could be considered under the umbrella of trans (I identify as sorta-NB, demi-girl? IDK where this falls) and sexuality also is extremely difficult for me to get into because of the complexities of it and how simple labels can be when we boil it down.

I don't know how to answer a lot of these difficult questions and I'll fully admit my ignorance and faults I've made.

I'm putting this under a cut so I don't put a giant post on the dash for people who don't want to get involved in it. Please let me know if you need this tagged

When I first made this blog I did see Azula more as a female-leaning bisexual with not a disinterest in men but more a lack of appeal towards them but wouldn't be entirely repulsed. After more speculation brought on by the mutuals I made here, I thought I might as well call her a lesbian and be flat out with it, but as me, personally, tends to be unsure how the term lesbian is seen in trans community for how Terfs like using it to discriminate against trans woman as they see lesbian as "females loving females"

I used the term lesbian and sapphic interchangeably in an attempt to be more inclusive to trans woman because there is a distinct difference between the complexities of sexuality with labels, social inclusivity, and how one personally might have a genital preference for certain sexes.

I have been informed and take responsibility that phrasing things this way does not help, or can do harm to lesbians and others by making it feel like it's a "bad" word so to speak. I accept that and you are in your full right to criticize me for it. I will do my best to keep this in mind going forward and you always are welcome to call me out for it in the future.

As to say, I'm not good and knowing how to address all this of a fictional character, let alone my own life! I call myself lesbian but I don't even know if that's true because sexuality is fluid the more we understand ourselves. My ow nsexuality has been difficult to understand with the deconstruction of what preferences are okay, what do i prefer, how my trauma impacts me being unabel to handle certai nthings, ive constantly been put into question of my label as lesbian because what if it is just my CSA trauma that stopped me from feeling safe with certain things that remind me of it, but i dont know how to fix it if it can be and i. i dont know

but its not something everyone will understand (sexuality and identity being flexible) because it can come off as "you can forcibly change someone's sexuality" which no. No I'm not saying that, but we can discover more about ourselves and change labels when we better understand ourselves and our likes and wants. (my gf for example identified as lesbian when we first met but under more analysis of herself she feels more comfortable being called pan now)

I don't genuinely know how to project all these complex thoughts onto a fictional character who in the canon is only like 14, and in the comics is 17, and genuinely am trying not to think about what the genital preference of a minor would be when they grow up because it lowkey makes me feel kinda gross.

When it comes to Azula, I don't think she personally holds any ill perspectives on trans women or trans men.

Azula holds a respect for power, honor, and a strong will. Whether the woman she speaks to or recuits is anywhere on the woman or non binary feminine leaning line or nb line in general I don't think she would discriminate against them.

I don't think Azula is a Terf, if that is what you're asking. Azula doesn't discriminate on that

she's very much someone who holds ill will towards people who personally harm her or slight her. Even the Earth kingdom and it's people she didn't hold an animosity for like she did Zuko, during the final Agni Kai, or even Mai and Ty Lee who she showed much more hatred towards for betraying her.

Trans people existing doesn't hurt Azula. Trans people living their lives, doesn't personally insult her.

Azula is fine with and would accept trans women and would accept them all the same as women or whatever they want to identify as.

*Edit, forgot to really answer the question: She probably had met at least a few trans individuals while traveling and wouldnt have any issue with them

** This also comes from Azula who was 110% fine with being called "Fire Lord" - Lord being what we see as a more masculine term than Fire Lady, so she 100% would be accepting of trans and NB individuals since she herself is willing to take on a masculine/male/whatever title despite identifying as a girl.

[astromechs]

A, V, and X Pls 😊

A - Your current OTP(s)/OT3(s)/OTX(s)

not to be Like This, but scarletnovadevil (rich/matt/wanda), the ot3 i invented, has completely taken over my life. i will shout from the rooftops every single day about how these characters all really vibe so well together. it's about the shared experiences of trauma, mental illness, and self-loathing, but realizing that good things are still out there for you if you're willing to work at them — and if you have supportive, understanding, and loving people by your side.

V - 3 OTPs from 3 different fandoms

neo/trinity — the matrix series

katniss/peeta — the hunger games

marianne/heloise — portrait of a lady on fire, because this absolutely counts

X - top 5-10 characters who are yoUR PRECIOUS BABIES AND YOU WILL DIE DEFENDING THEM

ok i will give a smattering assortment of characters here, because i have a lot of favorites:

katniss everdeen (thg) — i don't see it as much anymore, but people were really out here coming for a traumatized teenage girl and calling her a sociopath because she was a lil blunt and not super nice, like... WHAT. anyway, katniss my best girl. named my cat after you. you're the best always. love how she was messy and real and not at all like an archetypal protagonist.

anakin skywalker (star wars) — ok. i know. ok. yes. he's done the war crimes and made horrible decisions in his life and i'm not going to excuse any of that. but the jedi were emotionally invalidating assholes and he was immensely traumatized and taken advantage of by an emotionally manipulative prick. i will always stand by anakin bye

sherlock holmes was one of my og blorbos and while he doesn't need defending necessarily, christ did the bbc show give people a weird perception of him. he's just a funky little weirdo who likes solving puzzles and hates cops, why are you all being weird

clark kent/superman — i have been constantly having to fend off the "lol he's boring" allegations for him ever since i can remember. sorry if you're so unimaginative that you cannot possibly think that a guy who's just genuinely a good person and uses his power to help people is interesting. i feel sorry for your life. (note, this also applies to other characters who fit into this general category of character, especially my beloved boy rich rider, who also has to fend off the "lol boring" allegations from time to time. BEGONE)

i feel like pretty much any comic book woman who does something out of line needs defending, but i'll use this space to defend some of my faves. so elektra likes a little murder, so what, she's sexy for that and i support women's rights as well as women's wrongs. if anyone comes for gamora it's on sight. i will also always stand up for wanda because everything she's done is justified, and it's not her fault that everyone in her life has completely failed her when she needed help. like, honestly fuck both the avengers and the x-men lol

as a bonus this needs to be said — i'm peter quill's defense lawyer, even for the war crimes 616 peter committed, but also, y'all. y'all. mcu peter quill didn't do anything wrong in infinity war, you're just dumb for still arguing about this FIVE YEARS LATER.

also for the holy love of god are peter parker and matt murdock horribly misinterpreted by fans, like, always. bad takes abound. i'm here to defend the honor of y'all's characterization as well as your bisexuality.

fandom meme!

[rpmemesbyarat]

RP meme from Scream Queens Ep 5 "Pumpkin Patch" (Note: Offensive content, use at own discretion)

The theme was "Let Them Eat Cake," so my dad bought me this foreclosed McMansion down the street, and, like, 500 of my closest friends came dressed in 18th century attire, and, oh, the pool was filled with this, like, caviar slurry. And then at midnight, we just burnt the house down. When the firefighters came, they were actually strippers, and they put out the fire with champagne.

So walk me through this, honey.

Well, as you can see, every pumpkin in the patch is artisanal.

Then we move past the ice sculptures of demonic peeing cherubs, and yes, they will all be peeing vodka and Red Bull.

I'm sorry. Corn maze?

It's just that doing an exact replica maze from The Shining would have taken us way over budget on man power alone.

I told you money was no object.

Well, apparently, one of them died or something.

Do you have any idea what's at stake here?

Okay, well, it's not my fault that some guy died in the '70s.

I am tired of your sad-sack, I'm-a-total-downer-all-the-time schtick.

I'm over it!

Oh, my God, why are you so depressed?

Why do I have to be the homely one?

Just a second, nutbag.

God, do I have to spell it out for you?

You're a weird, psycho lunatic who's gonna end up in an asylum somewhere, staring at a wall, trying to nurse a watering can.

That's it! I can't take this anymore!

That is such a Mary Todd Lincoln thing to say.

You scream "I'm done with you" kind of a lot, and yet you're still standing here.

I think you know you have a good thing going.

You get to bask in my starlight as I do all the work and you get to grumble behind my back about how disrespected you are.

There's the door.

There's the door, bitch!

You did not deserve to be spoken to like that. Ever.

That is bollocks!

Clearly this fake kidnapping is a play to get the sympathy vote. So Gone Girl.

This is the biggest candle night of the year!

I hate you right now!

Halloween is the greatest night of the year. Greatest night. Because on this night, even kind of shy, kind of homely girls dress up like total sluts. I mean, every costume is just a slutty version of something. Slutty teacher, slutty nurse, slutty nun. I saw a girl last year dressed as slutty al-Qaeda!

See, Halloween it's a night for dudes with killer bods to walk around with our shirts off. And it's totally appropriate, as long as we call ourselves gladiators, Chippendales.

I have no idea how you got into this college.

Look, we'll just hang out and play charades!

This cannot be happening!

Hey, what about Black Hairy Tongue Disease? I mean, does nobody here care about Black Hairy Tongue?

What about my pumpkin patch?

I blame you for this.

[NAME], nice boobs.

Join me in saying you are not afraid!

Just baking some cookies for the neighborhood trick-or-treaters.

Uh, they're toenail cookies.

Pink fur coats worn in all weather, my idea. Flapper dresses made out of feathers, also my idea. Oversized sunglasses worn everywhere, my idea, my idea, my idea!

So why are you baking toenail cookies and giving them to children?

Okay, whose side are you on?

I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. I'm what you call

a "switch-hitter."

Wait, are you bisexual? Because that's what "switch-hitter" means.

Do you mean "double agent"?

What are you writing?

Do you know how big Halloween is in the candle community?

Is this an ant farm?

There's a mom ant, Deborah, who mostly just lies around and she has about 100 husband ants, who come around and give it to her good, which she really enjoys. And then there's about a million sterile daughter ants who feed her and are her slaves. So, an ideal family.

She'd win. And then I'd beg to be her second-in-command, while quietly pull the strings behind the scenes like Dick Cheney.

This plan involves a lot of circuitous logic.

Oh, my God! Those are, like, $100 each!

They're the highest quality candles that can be purchased retail.

What a brilliant and revolutionary idea.

Are you cheating?

This is a clear violation of the honor code.

You must be new here.

Who are you calling?

I'm gonna get you fired.

At least you wore something nice today.

Remember to smile for your mug shot.

I'm burping uncontrollably like Robert Durst.

They'll know I'm guilty!

I'm next in line and in charge here.

You can sum up my viewpoint on this with one word; indifference.

We are her only hope.

Sometimes, in order for a person to achieve their full potential, they have to do things on their own.

I am in charge here!

I love that you're a man.

This is the most sensual song ever written.

We need to do this right now!

I just saw her boobs.

Oh, a salad date is, it's like, it's more casual than dinner, but more formal than coffee.

Whose pants are these?

You know, you're a human being with feelings and needs, right?

Enough about me and my confusion and sad dead feeling inside.

It just really hurt my feelings.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure my so-called friends are the ones that turned me in so I'm just feeling, like, super alone right now.

Man, I am your biggest Instagram fan!

I just think you are a style genius.

I will never be able to repay you for the kindness you've shown me in here.

Besties for life, I say.

Your bail's been posted.

I knew you'd bail me out.

Can I just say what a relief it is to be able to share it with somebody and not feel judged?

You know, I mean, all my girlfriends are like, "That's immoral." "You should be ashamed of yourself!"

Ashamed? What the hell you got to be ashamed for?

You should be proud.

I could've lost my job.

I mean, it lasted, like, 45 seconds, and the whole time, it just felt like I was getting stabbed in the abdomen.

I tied him up and I kept my uniform on and proceeded

to read him his rights. My favorite being "You got the right to remain sexy."

Give me some!

You know he's sexy!

That was one of the best nights of my life.

Well, I've already contacted the police department, despite the fact that a person can't be considered "missing" until at least 72 hours has passed.

That's morbid.

I've already hired an investigator.

What, are you two a couple now?

What the hell are you doing?

You sold me down the river, bitch.

Wait, Gary Coleman's parents stole his kidneys?

I would never say that, because I'm pretty sure that never even happened.

Why does ratting me out sound like exactly something you would do?

You know, I've never thought of myself as a killer, but I am seriously considering ramming this pick into the back of your eye socket.

Maybe you'll get your head sawed off.

You have cameras in my room?

I have eyes everywhere, bitch.

The name of my future perfume is Revenge.

How is that something you just happen to know?

That is stupidest thing I've ever heard.

What's the password?

I just can't eat any more of these.

This ain't The Marriage Ref! This ain't Judge Joe Brown! We ain't on the Maury Show! We ain't standin' in line trying to get tickets to Dr. Phil! I am not Steve Harvey, people, and this ain't the Family Feud!

I'm tryin' to catch a killer.

Help me get the spy gear in the car!

How can you promise?

We're in a maze, you don't know where you're going!

I always knew it would come to this.

Why are we doing this right now?

I forgot the flashlights!

What am I supposed to do with this?

This is so creepy.

It smell like booty in here.

I'm getting a nervous feeling in my stomach.

I might start farting. If I cut some, you promise not to tell anyone?

Oh, my boob!

Stay where you are! I'll come and get you!

Ooh, this is nice.

It's really beautiful.

It looks like you just crossed some stuff out and wrote that in in marker.

Okay, can we talk about that for a second? Because it just happened a few hours ago, and I'm still really traumatized.

I need some cheering up right now.

Excuse me, darling, I'm exhausted.

Wait, we need to hear what happened to you.

Just wondering where you find a house with a pit. The market for them would be pretty limited.

Did you escape, or did you kill him?

I've always had a thing for bad boys.

That got way out of hand.

[fart-gate]

SG1

Season 2 episode 9

🚨trigger warning: mentions of rape in my notes🚨

"SECRETS"

Notes by me

- the chief from abydos! Also daniels father in law :)

- no glasses!Daniel in this scene

- I love how dedicated Daniel is to his space family and their culture😌 like this random Egyptian planet was like I'm gonna keep you! And he said okie dokie

- "I couldnt possibly be safer than in the company of tealc" AKDEOSNDJSJSSKA

- Jack wants to go back too lol

- Daniel back in his robes 💕

- back home for daniel! To abydos!

- Bodyguard!tealc

- apologizing to sha'res dad for not being able to find her yet 😟 its not your fault babe!

- SHA'RE??? YOUVE BEEN HERE THE WHOLE TIME WHAT THE FUCK

- tealc:

- shes pregnant and that is....really bad. If its one of the goaulds that raped her. This got dark real quick

- "husband!" "My daniel" I CANT HANDLE THIS IM ALREADY GOING INSANE

- he doesnt want to bring his hopes up that its actually her 😭

- hes shocked but like.....i would be too

- I was right its apophis kid :\ this so fucked up

- Host Baby??? Big Yikes

- okay I'm gonna say this right fucking now before i watch any more. If Daniel blames her and gets mad at her for being raped and getting pregnant WITHOUT her consent than i will personally come thru this screen and slap the fuck out of him

- meanwhile! Jack and Sam bonding time!

- SAMS DAD

- sha're thinking Daniel wont love her anymore :( she better be wrong or I'm throwing hands

- she said the goauld is Amunet? Is that the dog goddess? Or the crocodile? I'm getting my Egyptian gods mixed up

- Daniel sitting outside to Process™

- "hasnt she gone thru enough?" My brain stopped working I'm so happy hes not not blaming her. Writers for once youre doing something right

- man hes really emotional about this

- tealcs right they need to take her anyway for her own safety.

- do u think he sympathizes with her bc hes been raped too? Its not said but I feel like thats what it is. He knows it wasnt her fault. And that also means they can comfort each other about what happened to them😟bc they understand

- okay why is sams dad being a total dill hole

- "Ive heard nothing about you, sir." Jack youre not off to a great first impression

- Jack making sam smile with sly jokes

- her dad knows she be lyin about her job

- he wants her to go to space HAHA if only he knew. His tiny brain would explode

- Daniel said he loves her no matter what and then gave her a big hug im LOSING MY MIND

- are we keeping the baby??? Am I gonna see Dad!Daniel and mom!sha're ??? 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

- micheal shanks eyes are super blue in this episode for my viewing pleasure only

- protective!Daniel 😍

- I'm just remembering how they met and when she showed him the forbidden drawings in the caves and they spent days together just sharing knowledge. When he found out they were married(in her culture) and just completely accepted it. When he saved her bc he realised he was in love. When he stayed on abydos so that he could live a full life with her and her people because he felt like he belonged. I'm fine

- parents need to ask before they set up things like job interviews. I have personal experience with this and im full of rage

- this reporter literally having a recording of Jack talking about the stargate and Jack flatly denying it. Zero fucks given

- Daniel saying he wont force sha're into anything. Bc up to this point shes been forced into so much!! He knows he needs to let her make her own choices!!! He gets it!!!

- im sorry both Daniel and sha're are so pretty in his episode. My bisexual brain is just having a real good time looking👀

- I REALLY really love it when she calls him "my dan-yel" ❤❤❤

- the SGC has a mole???

- LABOR somebody boil water

- oh its my goauld mans with the sick earrings

- Daniel helping her give birth. Sitting behind her and helping her breathe. I'm love

- "this is where we hid from Ra remember?" Ajdjsisnana thats such a cool detail

- he'll never leave her again there goes my heart

- "It's O'Neill. With two L's. Theres another colonel O'Neil, but he has no sense of humor at all."

- dont you hate when youre about to uncover a huge government secret and then immediately get hit by a car

- shooting the zat gun into the camera was a cool directing choice 🔥

- sam: so I'm getting a medal for my service this week! Cool right?

Jacob Carter: I have cancer

- he could not have been any more blunt

- ok dude cant you just accept the fact that she cant tell you what her job? Dont you know what top secret means? Cant you just be proud of her for what she does already???? Dick

- "I will always love you!!"

- she is scared she will lose Daniel and the baby :(

- its a boy! 💙💙

- the goauld is back in control oh god Daniel run

- shes actually pretty scary as a goauld

- yeah ok shoot the woman who just gave birth tealc YEESH

- that was a good idea to frame Heru'hur tho

- Daniel hesitating to leave her again. My heart is breaking 😢

- they saved the baby at least

- poor sha're didnt even get to see her son 😔

- bringing the baby back to the grandfather was a good idea😊

- this baby is SO SO cute

- is Daniel a stepdad now. Is he gonna come back and play catch with the kid when hes older. Is he gonna fully adopt him. I want him to fully adopt him

- Jack blaming himself for the reporters death. You gotta stop doing this to yourself man

- black shirt Daniel 👀👀👀👀

- HAHA tealc shoving the jaffa into the vortex lmaooo

- "you dare challenge me?"

"I was thinking about it"

- WHEN JACK GRABS HIS KNIFE REAL QUICK AND SPEARS IT INTO APPOPHIS HAND

- she definitely saw them and didnt say anything

- "are you alright?"

"No. No im not.........but I will be."

"She looked directly at us, Daniel jackson. And yet she did not reveal our position." YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS LADS. Theres still hope for my girl. She can fight this I believe in her ✊😤

- I will say it again tho. This storyline for her is very fucked up. No excuses, its just a bit over used in sci fi for the women characters to have surprise pregnancies.

~

Whump under the cut

Tealc whump: fought with jaffa

Daniel jackson whump: shocked, emotional, crying, forced kneeling, back handed

Sam carter whump: emotional , crying

🎶listening to You Are The Reason by Calum Scott and Leona Lewis 🎶 in honor of Daniel and sha're making me lose my collective mind

No glasses!Daniel for most of the episode

[vclkitty]

I am confused ......I grew up in a homophobic church and they brain washed me to say a lot of homophobic things as a kid and looking back I rlly hate myself for this? Even though they made me think and say this. I'm not that way at all anymore but I can't forgive myself for being that way at any point in my life? im also bisexual and I feel like I'm not welcome in the community at all for having a time in my life where I was this way..😢 even though it wasn't my choice at all to be like that

Hey, anon. I’m honored that you came to me with this. 

I grew up the same way, with all kinds of homophobia around me, including internalized homophobia. It took years to unlearn all the bigotry, but you have to keep working at it. I understand how it feels to remember the person you used to be, and it hurts, but you have to accept that you have changed. As long as you’re not that person anymore, it’s okay. I completely understand. 

You’ve changed, and that’s a good thing! Self-acceptance is a great thing. I don’t think there’s anything to worry about if you’ve moved on from that point in your life. You’re different now, and that’s going to help you move forward and hopefully forgive yourself. Don’t be so hard on yourself! I think too many of us have experienced this kind of thing before, and it sucks to think about, but don’t dwell on it! It wasn't your fault. A lot of people don't change their views on things like this. Just forgive and move on, and embrace who you are now! 

[erijonarexhepis-blog]

IS SOMEONE REALLY DEAD?

SEASON THREE, EPISODE SIX ////// PART TWO

Part one

Masterlist

April makes her way down the staircase in the Keating house. "Are you going to the courthouse?" She turns her head and sees Bonnie sitting by her desk.

"I am," April makes her way over to the blonde. "Has professor Keating said anything to you?"

"Involving?"

"Me."

Bonnie shakes her head. "No, she hasn't. Why?"

"She won't talk to me, and it's infuriating. She called me out in class, and she didn't even spare me a glance."

"What am I supposed to do about that?"

"Can't you talk to her? I've been trying to tell her that our client's story was a lie, but she won't listen to me."

"What makes you say that?" Bonnie asks, with a frown on her face.

"She was working a desk job the day she said she was attacked. I did some digging and found out the day we met Dani."

Bonnie lets out a sigh. "Well, Annalise knows now."

April turns around and sees Annalise standing there. "Call that lawyer," she tells Bonnie. "Tell him to come here to meet Wes tonight."

Bonnie grabs the phone as Annalise turns to leave. The professor turns to Bonnie again. "Bonnie? I need your help at court."

"With what?" Bonnie stands.

Annalise finally looks at April. "See if Coleman is right about the story being a lie." She turns away and leaves, along with Bonnie.

"Are you okay?" Wes asks.

April turns to Wes. "Yeah." She approaches him. "What about you?"

"I—" he sighs. "— I don't know, honestly. Maybe the others are right."

"About what?" She frowns.

"It being my fault. I shouldn't have fallen for Rebecca."

April steps closer to Wes. "None of this is your fault, Wes. Rebecca came here on her own, and that would have happened whether you dated or not. You didn't do anything wrong. We will work this out— you gotta trust me on that." Wes doesn't say anything, but he nods— trusting her words.

"Ms. Keating, are you ready to begin?" Judge Kendrick asks.

"The defense calls Daniela Alvodar to the stand." As the client goes to take the stand, Simon turns around to face Michaela.

"I'm coming for you," he says in a low voice before turning back around.

Annalise stands next to her desk and starts questioning the client. "Can you tell us about the events that took place August 10, 2013?"

"I was on a rescue mission for aid workers in Afghanistan, guarding a Humvee when I got attacked from behind. The combatant put me in a chokehold, started hitting my head. I still have nightmares, wake up screaming."

"Did you see anyone about these symptoms?"

"I went to the VA. The doctor said it was PTSD."

"And do you think that this PTSD contributed to your altercation with Jace Stone?"

The prosecutor speaks up. "Objection. Speculation."

"Sustained."

"Can you tell us about when Mr. Stone approached you on the dance floor?" Annalise asks.

"He came up from behind me, pressing his body against mine."

"Would you say that this reminded you of the attack that you described?"

"Yes. I was in that moment all over again. That's when everything went black."

The doors to the courtroom open— Bonnie rushes in, holding something in her hands. "One moment, please," Annalise says before approaching her associate.

"Ms. Keating?"

Annalise looks through the file given to her by Bonnie. "I just received new evidence and request a meeting in your chambers. It's urgent, your honor."

"Let's take 15."

April and Michaela exit the courthouse together. "What did you want to talk about before?"

"Us," Michaela says, a little bit hesitant. "I know I said that I only want sex and nothing more, but..." she trails off.

"What?"

Michaela grabs her arm gently, stopping April in her tracks. "I want a relationship... with you. I want us to be girlfriends openly, and I want to go on dates."

April is surprised by her statement. "I thought you wanted to figure things out."

"I do," Michaela nods. "I still am. I haven't labeled myself yet— maybe I am bisexual, but why does it matter? I know that I have feelings for you and that I've never felt this way for anyone else."

"Really?"

"Really. I want to be able to hold your hand and show affection in public. I was worried because I- I didn't exactly plan this. I've planned my future, and I didn't plan to fall for a woman but plans changed because I have. I'm just hoping you feel the same way."

"I do..." April trails off.

"But?"

April lets out a sigh. "I don't have a good track record— not when it comes to dating. I mean... almost all my exes are dead. I've never had a good, long-lasting relationship— ever."

"Me neither," Michaela admits. "And with everything that has happened, I doubt either of us will find someone who understands us. We understand each other, and we know each other. There's nothing you can do to scare me off." April looks conflicted, so Michaela grabs her hands gently. "I want to give us a try— if you do."

A slight smile forms on April's face— which brings a smile to Michaela's face as well. "Okay."

"Okay."

"Don't say I didn't warn you, though."

Michaela chuckles as she grabs April's hand firmly in her own and drags her along. "You won't regret this."

"I hope not."

///

"Professor Keating, you need to see this," April calls out to Annalise, her eyes on the tv screen.

Annalise walks in. "What?"

"Sources confirm that Wallace Mahoney's own son is currently being held without bail, charged with first-degree murder," the reporter says. Bonnie walks in.

"Police have just confirmed that the identity of the suspect in custody is, in fact, Charles Mahoney. No stranger to the justice system. Charles was charged with the violent murder of his fiancé, Vickie Moran, in 2005, but after a highly publicized trial, he was acquitted and released."

"Frank," Annalise says, knowing he is behind it.

"The arrest was made earlier this evening after authorities found the suspected murder weapon, an unregistered Remington 2020, in his car."

"I told you," Bonnie tells Annalise. "He just wants to come home."

[transadvice]

Hi there! I'm an 18 year old bisexual girl. I've been thinking for a few months (up to a year) now that I may be a trans boy. I'm scared that it's too late for me to figure it out? But I don't want to rush it, cause I'm really not sure what I feel. I know this will change so much in my life so I don't want to decide too soon. Also, my mom tried for years to have a daughter, I don't want to disappoint her. Help?

!! Eighteen is definitely not too late to figure it out!! You’re never too old, and it’s never too late.

I figured it out when I was THIRTY ONE. I know guys who are starting their transitions now in the 40s, 50s, and 60s. There is this false media narrative that trans people “always knew”, from when they were tiny kids. This is how it happens for some of us, but not all of us, and as far as I can tell not even most of us. From an informal poll of my own personal trans friends, most figured it out in their teens or 20s. So I would say 18 is right smack in the middle of average.So don’t worry about age at all. You can still be trans! 

(Also, being scared that you might not be trans on a technicality is totally trans culture.)Now I want to talk about your mom. It is so sweet of you to try to live in a way that will make your mom pleased and proud. But it’s not your job to match the dream kid she imagined before you were born. Your only job is the be the best you that you can be. If being yourself means being a boy, then that is just the way it is. Being a boy is not something you’re doing to your mom, any more than your brothers (if you have them) are being boys “at” your mom. I can’t promise she won’t be disappointed in you, because plenty of moms react badly to their kids coming out, but I can tell you that it would be WRONG of her to be disappointed in you, just as it would be wrong of her to be disappointed in you if you had been assigned male at birth. If she takes some time to mourn her imaginary version of you, try not to take it personally. It’s not your fault that cis people assign all kinds of unreasonable expectations on their children based on nothing more than an ultrasound photo or a doctor’s announcement. You are not obligated to meet those expectations. Right now, you feel like you have a choice between being a girl for your mom or being a boy for you, but I think the longer you go on the more it will be clear that’s not your choice at all. You can’t choose to be a girl if you’re not. You can continue to live as if you are a girl, to bury the truth of your gender in your secret heart, silently endure your dysphoria, and deny yourself the euphoria and joy and rightness of being seen and treated as the person you feel like inside. Or you can give up on trying so hard to please others, and start listening to yourself, honoring yourself, and walking your own road, wherever that takes you.

[monstrous-beauty]

Monstrous Beauty Text Posts

Jake: What (and i cannot stress this enough) the fuck/ sure. blame the guy who's a huge idiot who causes a lot problems, again/ Me in jail: so are you guys familiar with the cell block tango/ Apparently "the vibes are off" isn't a just excuse to leave work early/ what, from the bottom of my heart, the fuck/ what doesn't kill doesn't kill you/ yesterday at target the cashier said "your receipt is the bag* and I responded with "you too" so I've been dealing with that for the past 18 hours but I'm slowly coming to terms with it which is cool/ *enters my own password* i'm in/ due to personal reasons I will be cheating death/ *gets down on one knee* *gets down on the other* *doesn't get up ever*/ Not to be dramatic but if I don't get my life together I will die/ I have pure intentions, bitch! you can't kill me/ cop: can you describe the guy who stabbed you me: yeah he was not very friendly

Storm: Which is messier my life or my hair/ "I am unknowable" I say as I overshare my biggest childhood trauma's in the first conversation with someone/ I love laying the FUCK down and sleeping/ me: [vibrating slightly because I had too much caffeine] everything in the world is my fault/ my only goal in life is to destroy the space-time continuum/ i am a huge fan of space, both outer and personal/ Yeah sex is great but have you looked at common English words and then followed their systematic time changes back through Old English and Proto-Germanic all to the way to their Proto-Indo-European roots, whispered one of those roots out loud, and been overwhelmed by a sense of Lovecraftian insignificance as it dawns on you that you just reached back across scores of centuries and spoke a word older than civilization itself?/ but i don't have a hyperfixation i'll die

Adrienne: im so tired of this life. i want to be a roomba. i want knives taped to me. i want to be set loose./ are my prophetic visions a joke to you/ There has been a lady inside my head screaming for the past 10 years and u think taking a bath and doing yoga will stop her? U are wrong. She is a very mad lady and she will not be silenced/ Cranky because you haven't had any prophetic dreams to aid you on your quest aren't you/ i wish it was 1600 so i cood spelle words howe everr my harte destyred/ me: *hangs out with little kids and tries to teach them self love and feminist ideas*/ Pros and cons of wearing all black pros: hot as hell cons: hot as hell/ If someone points at your black clothes and asks you who's funeral it is, a look around the room and casual "haven't decided yet" is a good response

Solais: mentally i'm at least 5"11. physically? don't worry about it/ don't call yourself edgy unless you talk to dead people and have daddy issues/ im a simple gal. people raise their voices at me, i cry for an hour/ once i figure out how to hold a conversation it's frienship for you bitches/ me: *is tiny* me: (;'._.');/ no homo bro *thinks about you* thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you*/ Listen man I'm just trying to wear soft sweaters and read my books and love myself/ i was put on this earth to eat bagels and be gay/ actually Ratatouille is the dish's name, you're thinking of Ratatouille's monster. im what the kids call

attention seeking/ me gay? why yes thank you for noticing/ on all levels except physical, i am a little heart shaped candy that says "i'm all yours!"/ nothing is awkward or cheesy if you don't give a fuck. i'm on this earth to have a good time. not to be cool./ i aspire to be one of those people who is known for always smelling good and treating people kindly/ big heart energy/ me @ you: >> this is my protecting women and girls knife/ doing violence tonight so watch out if you're weak to attacks/ why did my last two braincells have to be a sad one and a stupid one/ goes to the kitchen holds a knife in my hand for a while. puts it back. goes back to my room

Mal: these hands rated e for everyone/ forgive me father for I have sinned in all the coolest and most glamorous ways possible/ "I expected better from you" well that was your fault lmao i got nothing to do with that/ im beautiful im delicious i literally cannot die i want 200 dollars/ friendly reminder that i literally cannot die, and id love to see any of you fuckers try to take me down/ Slutty in theory but not in practice/ I just wannna be vaguely unsettling, not even scary or creepy, I just want people to look at me and feel like there's something A Little Bit Wrong but they don't know what when they tell the story of the slighty cryptid being to their friends later/ Hmmm gay rights but only for me i think? The rest of you are on your own/ i say i'm gay a lot for someone who is technically bisexual/ occupation: the family disappointment/ [steps on my emotions and grinds them under my heel] anyways/ i am evil and not straight/ me: breathes parents: I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR ATTITUDE/ you ever listen to your dad talk and be like "why are you like this?"/ dont you hate when you wake up and you're awake/ oh god...oh fuck...*yearns*/ Due to personal reasons I'll be going feral/ Quitting school to become a plant who wants to join me we can make a forest/ Anyways! *climbs out of the scattered and ruined debris of my feelings*/ so what if i love you. shut up/ i ask myself 48 times a day "am I being dramatic? Is this #toomuch?" the answer is always yes of course/ *lawyer voice* eat a dick, your honor/ I may seem like an asshole but deep down I'm good person and even deeper down I'm a bigger asshole/ in my defense, i was left unattended

[mbpokemonrulez]

hi I want to come out to my family but I'm scared... I'm of south Asian descent and I believe my family would want me to get married soon as I'm 24... i don't know what to do.. Do you have any advice? I'm a long time follower but I feel safer behind anonymous.. I'm sorry for putting this on you, you can ignore this if it's too much.. My brother thinks being gay is a choice.. I have a tough road ahead of me.

Oh honey, may I just say that I’m absolutely honored that you chose to come to me for advice – I really hope what I have to say can help you get some peace of mind. You’re right, there is a long road ahead. You and I both, we’re making our way down. For myself, being bisexual and Muslim has caused me to withdraw hugely from my family – I still haven’t come out to them, and it’s been six years. Though I’ll admit that I do have two siblings (out of three) that I think would support me if I did, it’s still a very scary thing to do. But I’ll start with your concerns about marriage: my parents have personally never pushed me when it comes to marriage; because of that I can’t relate to those pressures on a personal level, however I’m very familiar with the cultural beliefs (that my extended family surely shares) that you’re referring to. There wouldn’t be room for you to express your sexuality with those customs in play. I’m so sorry they’ve scared you so – just remember that you are your own self and that your word matters the most. It’s gonna take a whole lot to stand with yourself, to support yourself, especially with people who are so stuck in their ways, so attached to outdated cultural customs. A relative of mine actually refused an arranged marriage – it took some time for her immediate family to understand why. I understand that talking with your parents about these marriage concerns probably isn’t fruitful, perhaps they’re not as willing to listen, but if it’s brought up to you, it may be worth considering. In regards to coming out: that I can strongly sympathize with since my parents do not understand what being gay/bi/anything not straight is, and that it is not a choice. One thing I can tell you is that it’s so important to stick by yourself when you come out – sometimes people are very accepting while others may try to change you; if you run into the latter, just remember that you’re not doing anything wrong. Our families, they don’t like what they don’t understand – it scares them, and their first instinct may be to shut it down – get rid of the weird thing instead of taking the time to understand and accept it. But perhaps in time they’d be open to you educating them about this part of you. Maybe bringing the weird thing closer to home would have that effect on them. But that may take time, and the beginning won’t be easy. And that doesn’t always happen, and it is not your fault if it does not; it’s on them. I don’t know how strongly affected by religion you are but if that’s important to you, let me tell you that God made you the beautiful and amazing person you are for a reason. And He loves you, just as you are. And He always will, no matter what. Remember this if religion’s big with your family as well – no matter what they may try to tell you, God loves you and is on your side. All in all my friend, this is going to be a difficult thing to do. But remember that coming out is your choice – there is no rush and it’s all on your terms. If you don’t want to be alone, perhaps you could reach out to someone who you’re out to and trust to be there with you, if you’re comfortable doing so. I’m on your side. I’m always here for you. Please don’t hesitate to reach out again if you need anything else from me. You’re strong, incredibly brave, amazing, and perfect, and I love you. I’m sorry it took me so long to get this response to you – I wanted to make sure I included everything I’ve got. If any of my lovely followers have anything to add to this, please do! Thank you so much again for reaching out my dear, I promise things will be okay. ❤❤❤