#zeus has the biggest braincell in this situation

[mythologyfolklore]

Marpessa isn’t into gods (and Ares makes a speech about love)

(My take on the myth where Marpessa rejects Apollon out of worry, that he would abandon her in old age)

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Apollon was arguing with a mortal man over the probably most gorgeous girl he had ever seen.

Who did that boy think he was anyway? Daring to compete with him for a girl's hand! Him, the god of light, music, medicine, prophecy and so much more! This puny mortal man couldn't compare with him to save his life and he had the gall to point an arrow at his face!

“Lower your bow”, he ordered. “Cease this nonsense. You're insane to attempt to go against a god.”

“I don't care, if it's crazy!”, Idas spat. “I will stop you from taking away my bride, no matter what!”

“Cute”, Apollon commented, “But there is nothing you can offer her, that I don't have as well.”

“Sure is!”, Idas spat. “How about true love and a faithful and caring husband?”

The god gasped at the insolence: “Are you saying that I'm a liar and a player?!”

“No, I'm saying that you're an arrogant prick, who only wants her for her beauty!”

By now Apollon was too angry to just point out, that Idas was being hypocritical, since Marpessa's beauty had been the reason why he had abducted her in the first place.

With a face like thunder he pulled out the sword that was hidden beneath his chiton (and no, that was not a euphemism, that was an actual sword). “That's it! You must be hubristic or suicidal – or both! Either way, enough of the useless talk. Let's duke it out. Single combat, for the sake of fairness I won't be using any of my divine abilities.”

Idas nodded grimly. “So be it then.”

Then the god and the mortal engaged in mortal combat, while poor Marpessa just stood at the side, not knowing what to do.

This lasted for several hours and it was getting nowhere.

But then, all of the sudden a voice boomed: “EVERYBODY SETTLE DOWN!”

And in a flash of lightning, Zeus and Ares were standing between the contestants, driving them apart.

“Cease this pointless fighting right now!”, Zeus ordered. “This is getting ridiculous and the noise can be heard all the way up to Olympos.”

“Yep”, Ares nodded. “At first I thought it was funny, but then I looked down and saw, that you're fightin' over my granddaughter like she's some kinda prize.”

Ares' granddaughter, huh? Well, that explained why the oaf of a war god was here.

“So”, Zeus said, “why don't we just ask the lady herself? Has that occurred to you?”

Apollon felt just a little awkward, because in his case the answer was no.

Idas cleared his throat, making the three gods glare at him.

“In all respect”, he coughed, “Marpessa agreed to elope with me, because we're in love with each other and-”

“Did she?”, Ares questioned coolly. “Certainly didn't look or sound like that to me earlier-”

“No, no”, Marpessa finally spoke up, “He really didn't abduct me. I was just fearful, because the chariot was so fast. The speed was scary.”

“Huh. Sorry, my bad”, Ares apologised. “But her father (my son) just drowned himself in a river in despair, when you made off with his only child, so do forgive me, if I'm not the most reasonable.”

“My father is dead …?”

Zeus clapped his hands to get everybody's attention. “No time for this. Let's get it over with. Everybody be silent, except for Marpessa. This young lady here will choose who she wants to be with and the loser has to accept her decision. Is that clear?”

The two contestants nodded and Zeus turned to his great-granddaughter: “Well then, child. Make your choice.”

Marpessa looked back and forth between the god and the Argonaut.

For a few minutes, she considered.

Eventually she addressed Apollon (he could hear her heart racing in her chest): “Phoibos Apollon, Life-Giver and Lord of the Oracle …”

“Just Apollon will do”, he told her gently and tried not to look too nervous.

She swallowed and went on: “Please forgive me, but I choose Idas.”

The god of light felt all colour drain from his face, while Idas cheered in triumph and danced around joyfully, like young men in love had the tendency to do.

Great. Now that bold son of Poseidon got to be all smug and happy, while-

Oh, what was that? Ah, that was Apollon's heart being shattered into a thousand pieces! Again.

“Wh-what?! Wh-why?!”, he choked. “What does he have that I don't?!”

“Mortality”, she answered.

“What?!”

“Let me explain”, the young woman pleaded. “You're without a doubt the most handsome man I have ever seen – no offense, o King of the Gods …”

“None taken”, Zeus laughed in good humour.

“… I know what I would gain with you, Apollon”, Marpessa continued. “You're the god of many wonderful and terrible things and abundant in talents and virtues like no other. You could give me everything: adventure, excitement, and so on. But you're ageless and immortal. I'm not. I will age and die. You love me now, because I'm young and beautiful, but how will it be then? Will you still call me the most beautiful woman you have ever seen, when my face is covered in wrinkles and kiss the top of my hair, that by then will have gone grey? Will you be there, when I die? Will you cry, when I'm gone? Will you remember me fondly, because I delighted you in my youth?”

The god of music was speechless.

The question had hit him right in the gut. He hadn't thought about that – never had, because it had never been necessary. His lovers usually either broke up with him after a while, or they died young. Or he didn't get lucky in the first place, like now.

“Your silence says it all”, Marpessa sighed. “You wouldn't – perhaps even couldn't – stay with me for the rest of my life. But Idas would. He truly loves me. We will grow old together and, for all of his adventures, he will never abandon me.”

The Argonaut hugged her from behind and she turned her head to smile at him.

No, there was no chance he could convince her to change her mind, Apollon realised.

Suddenly there were sniffles behind him and to everyone's surprise, Ares was wiping his eyes.

“That was one of the most beautiful speeches I have ever heard!”, he sobbed. “I just can't even! Anyway, well chosen, my granddaughter. You two have my blessing. Off ya go!”

She beamed at the war god and let Idas help her back onto his chariot.

And off they went.

Zeus gently pat Apollon's shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. “Better luck next time, my son”, he said. Then he vanished in a flash of lightning, leaving Apollon with Ares of all gods.

“Won't you leave too?”, the god of prophecy asked.

Ares shook his head. “Ya don't wanna be alone as much as ya think ya do.”

“Ares, please.”

“M-mh. What she said back there really got to ya, didn't it?”

The blond god groaned in distress. “She really thinks I'm so shallow as to abandon her at the very first wrinkle.”

“Well, is she wrong?”

Apollon stared at the black-and-red-haired god. “Excuse me?!”

“Has anyone ever asked that of ya before?”

“Well, no, but-”

“Would you have stayed with her?”, Ares queried sternly. “I'm her grandfather, so I wanna know. Would you stay with her until she dies? Would you make the effort of weathering the storms of life with her, for better and for worse? Would you be to her what every person, mortal or divine, needs: a constant in her life, who's always there? Would you give her the loyalty every woman wishes for? Could you handle the pain of seeing the woman you fell for grow old and frail, while you stay forever young? Could you still love the face that belonged to the once most beautiful girl in all of Hellas, when it's full of wrinkles? Would you still find her beautiful? Would you wax your pretty poetry and tell her cheesy shit to cheer her up, when she gets nostalgic? Would you take care of her, when she can no longer take care of herself? Would you hold her hand, when she lies on her death bed, tell her how much you love her and give her one last kiss, before she descends to Hades?”

“I … I …”

Ares cupped Apollon's chin and forced the younger god to look him in the eyes.

“You're not that kinda guy, Apollon”, he stated with uncharacteristic gentleness. “Ya give your affection so easily, but it fades so quickly. And even if not, you leave your lovers with pretty gifts and abilities and then watch them from afar. But that's not what they need. What humans need is commitment. What Marpessa an' I just listed up? That's commitment. That's real love. And it takes a kind of courage most gods don't have or are unwilling to muster, 'cuz lovin' a mortal is painful. You an' I know that all too well, don't we?”

By now Apollon was trying really hard not to cry in front of the savage god of terrible war. But damn, Ares had a forsooth impeccable talent of hitting people, where it hurt the most. It was rivalled only by Aphrodite and their arsehole son Eros (like parents like son, Apollon supposed).

Ares sighed and hugged his younger half-brother.

“I hate you!”, Apollon choked. “And your oldest son too! What have I done to you for you to always hurt me like this?!”

“I know, I know”, Ares muttered. “Promise, I didn't do it on purpose this time, though. I just wanted ya to understand.”

“…”

“It's okay to cry, by the way. I may not be the best shoulder to cry on, but I won't judge. Let it out. It'll do ya no good to bottle it all up.”

Screw it.

The god of light collapsed in his older half-brother's arms and began to bawl relentlessly into the other's shoulder.

“Shhh”, the other murmured, while soothingly rubbing Apollon's back and holding him tightly.

They stayed like that for a while, before Ares backed off to look at the other.

“Man, they're really screwin' you over, huh?”, he asked sympathetically. “C'mon, lil' brother. Let's go home. Hestia gave me lots of cookies, but I don't like sweets, so you can have them as comfort food. Take a break from love and while you're at that, think of what I said, hm?”

Apollon just sniffled and let the older god transport them both back to Olympos.