#zim is like why am I feeling weird all of a sudden- OH ITS MY CHILD

[mrehkka]

Have another corporeal pak-zim 😌 they can be read in any order haha but yeahhhh while some of Zim's bad decisions are his own, some are because of the PAK lol (like blowing up the Irken capitol in Operation Impending Doom 1).

Note: most Irkens don't have this problem! It's just zim arguing with his pak functions because... he can. Other Irkens probably don't even notice a separation between what they want and what the pak says

[gugf]

Another take on zadf. This is sort of fanfic cause comic will be to long, enjoy!

[Dib's room. Tense situation]

"Let's tell each other secrets! But it shouldn't be something like "Once I peed in the second grade because my sister locked me in the closet" It should be something.... Like, really serious!"

"...Okay. If it's necessary, then so be it. But you're the first!"

"Seriously?"

"You won't tell me, I won't tell you"

"Oh, come on! Jeez... Okay... I... I'll think of something...... l... I hate my father... He doesn't understand me and doesn't want to understand me... All he cares about is science and imposing it on me. He never hears me because of his idiotic fanaticism! Shience... shience... it's what I hear everyday! I want to live the way I want, and I am sure in it, I'm not crazy or something!.. So let him continue to hate me and do his stupid work... But... still, despite everything, I respect him, you know? I want him to recognize me!... He's not interested in it anyway, and he's too ashamed of me. Ideally, he probably wants to make me do his stupid hobby without thinking about my feelings for a second. But I don't want that, can't he see? Why can't I earn his approval with something else? Let him at least once look at me with my eyes, and not with his own! He doesn't want to understand me, he doesn't even want to look at me... That's it... That's what I have. So... what's your secret?"

"... "

"..."

"... My mission is a lie."

"What?"

"Oh, nothing serious, it doesn't bother me, I don't even think about it, it's a mere trifle"

"W-WHAT?"

"Hey, HEY! A lot of questions! We only give out one secret! That's it, the end of the diss-"

"I'M A CLONE OF MY FATHER!"

"...?"

"T-that's the thing. That's why it's so important to me. It even sounds weird... I am my father, but at the same time I'm NOT like him at all! This... this... this makes me a FAILED experiment. W-what if he sees me only as a failed experiment? For him I'm some sort of malfunctioning... s-something. But I thought about it and... if this was true he would already replace me! And he keeps my whatever-she-even-is sister around, so it must not be that bad... It could be worse after all..."

"... "

"I would like to know... Why... Why do you think they lied to you?"

"Huh? I didn't think about it... I honestly don't even know..."

"Hey! That's not the answer! There must be some reason! We have an agreement, remember!"

[Zim sits down on the bed next to Dib, who has been sitting there all this time]

"Okay, okay, I think!... I think!.. T-they definitely got mad at some minor thing like that robot!'

"Robot? Are you talking about Gir?"

"No! By the way, I was sent into exile because of it..."

"YOU WERE IN EXILE?

"Oh, yes, it was terrible, but then I ran away, they realized their mistake, and sent me to do what I'm really good at, ENSLAVE!!!!"

"You said that the mission is a lie!"

"What? When? How could I say that! Stop trying to deceive me with-"

[Dib stands on the bed and abruptly raises the recorder above him]

* My mission is a lie *

"Hey! You recorded this!"

"ANSWER, Zim!"

" ... "

[Zim sits on the edge of the bed with his back to Dib]

"..."

"....I do not know why everyone hates me"

"... "

"..."

"You didn't record that, did you?"

"...Oh, look there's something in the window!"

"Oh... Yes.... Cool..."

"..."

"... "

[Zim looks absolutely devastated]

"You know... I think that's enough secrets for today. I'd better go get some food."

[Dib leaves the room, a lot of thoughts and guesses are spinning in his head. Zim was in exile? Also escaped?  And what's with this sudden change of mood? Dib believed that for all the time spent with him, it turns out that he didn't know anything about him at all. But now his curiosity was at its peak.]

[He opens the door and the wide-open window tells him everything he needs to know. This is partly what Dib expected.]

[Well, there's nothing to be done. He lies down on the bed upset. Turns on the recorder.]

*I do not know why everyone hates me*

* I do not know why everyone hates me*

* I do not know why....

[snappedsky]

Fanatics 73.1

Some new enemies are crawling around the city. But who are they? Previous! Next!

--

Government of Doom Part 1

           In a hidden government facility, agents are working around the clock, monitoring energy levels from all the around the world on their computers. One man notices something odd and calls over his supervisor.

           “Sir,” he says, “these levels from a city in California are very…strange.”

           The supervisor sighs wearily before even looking at the computer. “Ah, yes. That’d be the Nameless City.”

           “The what?”

           “A city in California without an official name,” he explains, “to call it ‘weird’ would be an understatement. Levels have always been high there but it’s always contained to the city so we don’t worry about it much.”

           “O-okay,” the agent nods, “but I still think you should take a look.”

           The supervisor looks over the agent’s shoulder and his eyes widen with surprise. “Wh-what is this…?”

           On screen is a sort of graph with a coloured line displaying paranormal energies in that area. One of the jobs of these agents is to make sure the line stays a nice, even level. But on screen right now, the line is fluctuating wildly, constantly spiking and falling seemingly at random.

           “What timeline is this?” the supervisor asks.

           “The last year or so,” the agent replies.

           “I have never seen anything like this before,” he mutters before standing up straight. “I’m gonna discuss it with the director but I’m betting it’s time we’ve stopped turning the other cheek when it comes to the Nameless City. They’ve been left alone for too long.”

---

           “Are we almost there?” Tak asks impatiently.

           “Yeah, I’m getting grass stains,” Gaz grunts.

           “We should be close…I think,” Dib replies.

           “Why do we have to crawl?” Pepito asks.

           “So we don’t spook them,” he insists.

           “Everyone shut up,” Zim hisses, “we’re here.”

           The Battalion pokes their heads over a bush and looks out towards a small lake a little ways outside the city. What they see has them gasping in awe.

           Two horses are drinking from the lake. Their hides are pure white and smooth like ivory, their hooves are gold and sparkly, and their manes and tails are all the colours of the rainbow. And protruding from their heads are coiled crystal horns that sparkle in the sunlight.    

           “Unicorns!” Dib squeals into his hands to muffle his voice.

           “That crazy homeless guy was right,” Pepito remarks.

           “Not sure he’s so crazy now,” Gaz comments.

           “What do you think, Squee?” Zim asks.

           “Gaz may be right. If he’s right about the unicorns, the rest of his babbling might not be crazy,” Squee replies.

           “No, I mean about the unicorns.”

           “Oh, right.” He awkwardly clears his throat. “Uh well I don’t sense any kind of malice but that could be because they’re relaxing.”

           “Should we just leave them alone?” Pepito asks.

           “We can’t just leave,” Dib snaps, “nobody has any documented proof on unicorns. They’re one of the rarest of the supernatural creatures.”            “We’re not documenting them,” Squee says sternly.

           “Fine,” he groans, “but we still can’t just leave.”

           “Alright,” he sighs and removes his bag and sweater, handing them to Pepito. “Hold my stuff. I don’t want them perceiving me as a potential threat.”            “You sure about this?” Pepito asks.

           “Yeah,” Squee nods as he steps over the bush. “I don’t think they’re dangerous.”            He slowly, carefully, approaches the unicorns, keeping low to the ground. Once he’s a couple feet away, he stops and sits in the grass.

           The one closest to him takes notice and looks at him. Its eyes are pure black orbs that sparkle in the light, immediately reminding Squee of the stars in space.         ‘Uh…hi,” Squee waves.

           The unicorn leans over, smelling him, before blowing air in his face, making him chuckle, and going back to the lake.

           “Guys, it’s okay,” Squee calls back to his friends. “Just leave your weapons and come slow.”

           The rest of the Battalion cautiously hurry over. The unicorns look at them but seem more interested in their drink as the kids examine them.

           Dib carefully touches the second one’s back and strokes it. “They feel so smooth, like made of crystal.”

           “Their hair is really soft,” Tak says as she runs her hand through the other’s mane.

           “I gotta admit, this is a nice change of pace to the usual creatures we deal with,” Pepito remarks.

           “Yeah, they seem really peaceful,” Squee agrees.

           “Kinda boring,” Gaz comments, “but I guess they are pretty.”            “I am surprised that they are so comfortable around us,” Dib muses, “being such elusive creatures, I figured they would be more cautious.”

           “They can just tell what’s a threat and what isn’t,” Zim shrugs, “they must be clever creatures…for Earth.”

           The kids hang around for a couple minutes. While the unicorns aren’t very social, they are quite chill and they give off a very calming atmosphere. Even the usually high-strung Zim and Tak find themselves relaxing by the creatures’ sides.

           But their quiet afternoon comes to a screeching halt when they all immediately sense another’s presence. The Battalion whip around just as a bang rings out and something smashes into the ground where one of the unicorns was standing. But both are already gone, having sensed the danger, and galloping across the water. The kids, however, are too distracted to notice.

           “Was that a gunshot?” Squee shouts, covering his ears.

           Tak’s cybernetic eye scans the surrounding area. She sees residual body heat from where a person was hiding in the trees behind them, but the person themself has already ran off.

           “Whoever it was, they’re gone,” she says.

           “Gah,” Zim snarls, “if I find out who that was, they’re gonna pay.”            “Maybe we can,” Dib muses as he digs around in the dirt and pulls out a bullet, completely intact.

           “Give it!” he demands, snatching it from Dib’s hand. “I’ll examine it in my lab.”

           “Who else knew the unicorns were here?” Squee asks.

           “Anyone who goes down Main Street,” Gaz replies.

           “But who else would listen to a crazy homeless guy?” Pepito asks.

           “And why would somebody try to shoot them?” Squee adds.

           There’s a heavy silence as nobody can think of an answer.

           “Let’s just get out here,” Dib orders.

           The others nod in agreement and they head through the woods and back to the highway.

           Dib drives everyone home in the Epic. They’re all rather tense after what just happened, their minds reeling.

           Squee is the last to get dropped off before Dib and Gaz go home. He rubs his neck as he walks up to the house, feeling drained all of a sudden. But before he reaches the door, a chill runs down his spine and he turns around.

           The street is quiet, as per usual. Passersby never cross through Grave Road, believing it to be cursed, and the few neighbors are either inside or at work. But Squee can feel someone watching him.

           “Where are they?” he asks.

           “They’re well concealed,” Shmee replies.

           “Irkens?”

           “I don’t think so.”            Squee’s eyes narrow. Before, he would’ve tried to ignore the danger, not wanting to get involved. But now he finds himself not feeling so afraid. More annoyed than anything.

           He clicks his tongue and goes inside, pulling out his phone and sending a message in the group chat.  

Squee: Something’s watching me

Tak: Same here.

Pepito: me too i think

Zim: Dib and Gaz?

Squee: They’re probably still driving home.

Zim: Everyone stay on your guard and regularly check in. Something is about to happen.

           Squee half-waves to Johnny and Cammie as he passes by the couch, still texting his friends. Cammie waves back, contently watching TV as she pets Nugget. Nny isn’t quite so blissful. He knows someone has been watching the house all day and it’s pissing him off. Tonight, as soon as everyone’s in bed, he’s getting to the bottom of it.