thedevilwearsblack-blog

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Fo real. Ughhh -_____________-

that moment where your parents lecture you.

and they keep repeating the same god damn thing.

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Deep, but not really.

Whadddddup.

It's been a stressful fall quarter, and season. Keeping up with homework, work, and extra curriculum activities. Very exhausting... let me tell you. But I've got my head up. No time to waste. To be honest: I just want to be done with Ai. I just want to leave Minnesota. I don't belong here. I really don't. Can a fairy just give me money so I can travel the world? Or at least help pay for school???? I would appreciate that. But I've got to thinking, I can't wait to go get my masters in 2 years. I'll be in a new country --- and I will fall in love, I just know it. The only countries I've been to is Laos and Thailand. I just want to travel and be around different people. Anyways, I'm excited for Thursday. I get to see my fambam and cousins. I'm sure they have all matured and changed. But no matter what, I love them to death. I hope they feel the same way. 

I try my hardest to please everyone, but I've realized... my happiness comes first than anything else...

Good Night,

TheDevilWearsBlack

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

My first thought when my alarm clock goes off:

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Lovely Monday.

I heart Monday Nights. 

It's what I call "Homework days."

I have Coconut Mango Tea brewing, candles lit, and a Thai Drama on. 

I'm all set for an all nighter of studying. 

Enjoy your night everyone :)

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Did I offend you?

So maybe I offended you in the last post. But it was how I felt. Feel free to disregard it. Sorry if I did, innocent ones.

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Realization.

Don't mind me, I'm just going to say random shit no one really cares about. I've been on my own lately. Not giving a fuck about what anyone thinks. It's a waste of my time and energy. I try my best to be nice and change to make people happy. Really, bullshit. Just came to realization that I don't change for anyone. I'm fine being myself. I don't give a fuck about my grammatical equations! This is a blog for heaven's sake. Fuck off. Being so fucking stressed out and overwhelming myself with nonsense is not good the to body! Yeah, what! I make no sense. Asian, yes that's what I am. Deal with it mother fuckers. Sick and tired of everyone identifying all the asianness in me. Don't fucking call me Asian or fucking bring shit up. Call me by my first name only. Suzanne. You don't what me to call you a white trash American who has no fucking game... Now do you? I didn't think so. So, keep your mother fucking shit to yourself, and leave me the fuck alone. Backstab me! I haven't felt anything. Just irritated with society. 1 and a half year and I'm saying deuces! Those are my thoughts, for now. Now, who wants to sip tea and bitch?

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

True day sista. Couldn't say it better myself!!!

My team of STYL and I got the opportunity to collaborate with founder of L.P.F Projects, Mimi Nguyen to help her co-produce a Charity Fashion event for Japan due to the tragedy that occurred 7 months ago, and basically with only TWO MONTHS of planning, we finally did it! 

 While in the planning and organizing process, I remember days and nights feeling stressed out and frustrated with planning for the show. I remember not being able to sleep because all I could think about was this show; what STYL and I still needed to do and gather and plan for meetings and model fittings and all that fun stuff. I remember sleeping over at my friend Suzanne’s (Director of STYL)  house and we’d stay up til 5am just to plan and organize, whether that be contact sheets, updating the rosters, creating excel charts, organizing tasks and duties, planning meetings, calling models, volunteers and designers, etc, etc…. 

There were times I felt like giving up because my grades were falling and I just didn’t have enough energy to attend my classes because THIS SHOW was all that cared about - because no matter how much I stressed and how deprived of sleep I was. I was willing to work hard and bleed my tired eyes because this is how compassionate I feel about Fashion. Even over education you might wonder? YES. (lol.) Of course, education is EVERYTHING to me, but when i’m in that moment of being Fashion, I’M REALLY IN THAT MOMENT and I don’t care about anything else. 

This show had to be perfect! Not only for the sake of my organization, STYL, that is, but I wanted it to be perfect for me, for my crew members and for Japan. 

Many people want to become event planners, but they have NO IDEA the kind of hard-work that goes into it. It’s not just having a passion for Fashion, it’s about having the core skills of being able to plan and organize - yes, everyone can have those skills, but you have to have great attention to detail, be analytical, the strength to work under-pressure and meet (last minute) deadlines. Another advice, be sociable because you’ll have to call, call, call and email, email, email people. 

After the event was over, I felt so much weight off my shoulders. I was able to breathe again at least for a while because STYL and I are still busy working on other events. But as I got home, it felt so surreal that it was over - ALL OVER. My body and mind was still stuck on “Mimi’s Fashion show.” But like I said earlier, I really did it! :)

Overall, this was more than well-worth it! I’m glad that STYL and I can do something great especially for a big and important cause. It has definitely been an experience! A wonderful learning and growth experience. It is such an absolutely amazing achievement. Despite a few mess-ups that were on the runway, the show was a success and I couldn’t be more proud of myself & STYL because honestly, we basically did ALL of the work. 

xxo

Hope you all enjoy the pics! 

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

My heart still bleeds.

I am so mentally, and emotionally exhausted that I don't feel the need to do anything anymore. I don't want to breathe and be alive. I just want to sleep forever. I'm learning to leave things the way they are. No more trying to change anything. I'll just learn to shut my mouth, and not say anything. It's draining all of my energy. I just miss how I used to be. I'm just dreaming. That's all. 

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Cognitive thoughts.

I miss who I was before. I miss writing, and being invisible. I haven't had time to write, sleep, or anything... I haven't enjoyed life the way I wanted. I think it's a good thing that I'm keeping busy. But a half of me wants to stop everything and leave. Somedays, I imagine myself living across the country with my soulmate. Somedays, I imagine myself leading myself and finding out who I truly am.

I must admit, I'm so thankful for the opportunities lately. It hasn't really hit me that this is happening. I can not believe 7 months ago, I didn't see myself leading a fashion organization. 7 months ago, I wouldn't even think this organization would move forward. 7 months ago, I was planning to move and be in a whole different place. 7 months ago, I was lucky enough to meet the most amazing people ever. 7 months ago, I was just a student making dreams come true.

Today, my team and I are growing our organization to be the best it can be.

Today, STYL is national and in the presses.

Today, STYL is producing events and building relationships with clients. 

Today, STYL is a dream come true.

This would have not happen without my amazing crew, our partners, clients, volunteers, supporters, and instructors. 

I am thankful and truly blessed.

My passion has now inspired others to lead their dreams and learn along the way.

I will continue to do my best to lead and guide others trough the right path. 

I will still have haters, believers, and lovers; but no matter what, I'm living my dreams, and no one can stop me. 

I have many destinations, but I'm only reaching for one; my goal.

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

lindayoubeezy:

DTA

True dat cuzzz!

Don't trust anyone.

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

I shivered, once again.

Lost in a cold world. Deep cuts within the skin. Sensation to destination. Words that makes no sense. Cold, blood, deep. Eye opening. Sad faces, wrinkles, mess. 

Feeling imperfect - wanting to be perfect.

Drugs- relieves stress.

Stress- more wrinkles.

Love- lies.

Poetry- dark.

Bitch- trying to survive.

Real- fake.

Passion- life.

Busy- avoiding you.

Workaholic- money.

Relax- work.

Shy- has a lot to say.

Brave- too much has been said.

Just another analogy. Another, after another. 

Yet, I'm still shivering with darkness. Burr, scale my skin. Break my bones. 

---> My soul still survives.

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

One last thing;

"If there's one thing I've learned it's that there would be no gossip without secrets. You might be brave enough to reveal your secret only to have it used against you. Or someone else's secret might affect you in unexpected ways. There are some secrets you are only to happy to keep. Others surface only to be buried away deeper than they were before. But the most powerful secrets are the truths you thought you could never reveal. That once spoken, change everything."

xoxo, Gossip Girl 

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

mengtimes:

It’s that time again. It’s the time when sleeping in only happens on the weekends. It’s the time when the crazy summer habits have to be put on hold. It’s that time of the year where school is everything again.(Well supposed to be everything.) It’s the first day of school. Good luck to all the...

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

Beautiful right? on May 9th she was on her way to my uncles house with one of my gang banging cousins in the car. She picked him up from a friends house just after he had gotten into a fight with one of the dudes he was selling to. My mom was half way to my uncles house when 4 gun shots went off. She was shot 2 times in the back of her head. She never came home after that & the last time I saw my mom she was in a casket. To think my mom died because of somebody else breaks my heart, and for all these anons to sit here & say she deserved to die is HEARTLESS. I never even got to tell her happy MOTHERS DAY on HER day to get rewarded for EVERYTHING she died. =/ I love you mom & PLEASE REST IN PEACE BEAUTIFUL.

Read it and reblog because you actually care.

[thedevilwearsblack-blog]

A Walk To Remember: LOVE 4japan project.

A Walk To Remember: LOVE 4Japan Project

STYL is co-sponsoring this event for a great cause. Mimi has done a fantastic job organizing this.

We do need volunteers:

10 Assistant dressers, 3 Organizers, 2 Greeters, Seating. 5 extras for misc.

Let me know if you would like to fill out an application! Thank you!

Purchase your tickets here at: http://www.vitalculture.com/events/detail/1479