thefiveftrunner-blog

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

WHERE HAVE I BEEN!?!

I have literally been in my own version of hell.

I had all of my finals pretty much back to back. But I'm free now.

I had my doctor's appointment today.

Get this - I HAVE BILATERAL STRESS FRACTURES IN BOTH OF MY TIBIAS.

I am not to do any hard exercise for at least 6 weeks. He basically said I can swim, do the elliptical, and lift weights. How stupid.

I literally almost started crying in his office. 

Oh and I'm getting fitted for custom athletic orthotics next Tuesday. So yeah, I guess that's something.

And I'm supposed to start taking calcium supplements/watching my intake of everything. STOOOPPIIIIDDDDD.

Yeah, so that basically put 2 of the 5Ks I wanted to run out of the question and put the Lakeshore Classic and I mostly likely will be no where near ready to run a half by October. STUPID.

GRRRRRRRRRR. I'm just gonna go hulk-smash everything and emotional eat.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Clearly doing Finals week right by making letter stencils. #lettersonlettersonletters #letsgetcrafty

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Happy Mother's Day to the lady who taught me everything I know. Especially how to be super cool. Love you, Momma Bear! #mothersday #motheranddaughter #whitagram

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

direction and life thangs

I'm going to nursing school. That's, like, a set thing. At this point, I'm committed and I will become a nurse. No ifs, ands, or buts.

That doesn't, however, commit me to a life of just nursing. Don't get me wrong, I am so excited to become a nurse. I am really excited to care for people and to make an impact on their life.

I'm leaning towards ER nursing or Pediatric Oncology nursing (like at a big children's hospital). No matter what specialization I choose I will be making an impact and helping people.

But I want my life to mean more. I want to leave a different kind of impact as well. I want to leave a legacy and an impact on people's souls. On future generations.

Most of you probably don't know, but I am a Christian and have been seriously involved in the church my whole life. I was always the girl that went to at least one Church Camp (most summers multiple) every summer. I went to Youth Group every Sunday night. I loved it. I soaked up every minute of it.

Then during high school my church started "dying" and no more youth were there except for myself and two twin boys who were a year older than me. We stuck together. But being a year older than me meant that they left a year before I did. My senior year of high school I was left at church and youth group all by myself. I didn't get to do anything and was barely able to go to church camp that summer.

I want to make sure that doesn't happen to other youth. I can't wait to join a church community that really relies on their youth and pushes them to do things. I can't wait to work with youth, maybe not as an "official" youth pastor, but as a mentor and someone that can lead bible studies and take them on mission trips and to camps. Someone that can show them that it's not weird to believe in God during high school and college. I'm doing just that and I have never met anyone that has a problem with it. Most people I know encourage it. 

I want to show youth that it's okay to not do what everyone else is doing. That you don't have to go out and party and drink and flirt with that really cute ugly frat boy that your friends think would be "just perfect" for you. That sometimes going out to a party, having a few drinks, and flirting with that ugly cute frat boy that your friend said would be perfect for you (because he is) is just what you need to do. And that neither of those things make you a bad person. 

I want to do something that matters. I want to help people. I want to do it all. And I will.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Thanks! I'm trying my best to be positive!

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

I wish I had something fun to tell you, but I don't. I'm hurt and basically can't do anything fun. I've wasted my afternoon trying to catch up on Game of Thrones. Now let the studying for finals commence.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

boys, boys, boys

Last night I was still kind of down about still having pain in my leg and was a smidgen depressed about it. But boys (!!!) are always the answer.

One of the fraternities seniors came to serenade us last night. If you've been in Greek like you've probably experienced it or even performed yourself. We waited around for an hour (ladies do not like to be kept waiting. gentlemen, take note) and by the time they had gotten to our house we had come up with our own little serenade for them as well (our national's won't allow us to serenade because they consider it hazing, STUPID). 

Anywho, for those that don't know senior serenade is a little like this except drunker and a lot more naked. If that doesn't cheer you up then I don't know what will. Our boys were actually tied together by a rope so their littles didn't lose them. Although it did take them like 10 minutes to walk from the sorority house right next door to us. 

But yes, senior serenade is definitely a spirit booster.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

This is me before hanging out with Jillian Michaels. I can assure you that I do not look like that now. Lo and behold, I had some shin pain again (!!!!) I'm really getting tired of it. I figured that I'd be safe with a workout DVD. Nope. Nada. I'm always wrong when I assume things. And I have lost so much endurance/strength. I'm literally going to have to start all over when I get cleared for running again. Countdown to doctor: 9 days.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Well this morning has been a little craptastic. Filled with no sleep and stupid people. I'm putting on my favorite summer dress in hopes of making this day awesome. I took about a million selfies and pulled the 'ole "does this backpack make my butt look big?" Oh, and I broke my Camelbak last night. I'm probably the only human that can do that.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Funks like this are no fun!! A week and a half until I go to the doctor and you better believe that I'm not leaving without an answer, solution, and a plan to get there.

I love swimming!! But I didn't get to go tonight. :( I ended up working for my supervisor this summer helping her file paperwork for everyone else working at the pool. And I can't go tomorrow because I have a dinner and then sorority stuff all night. Boo. So I think I'm going to do something easy tomorrow and get super serious about some pool laps on Thursday night.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Thanks! I think I'm gonna go ride the bike for a little bit tomorrow. Get some resistance on my legs and get my heart rate up. Bike hills can't hurt, right?

I think I'm just letting the stress of everything get to me and once I get some endorphins in me and get finals over with, that I'll be fine.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

bad thoughts = bad feelings

I was fine today. Really. I loved being in my swimsuit and sitting in the sun.

Then I had to go try on suits for lifeguarding. And it was just a total confidence killer. I know that they're not going to be huge and cover everything. I know that they have to be somewhat tight. But I just got completely cut down looking at myself in the mirror.

And then my boss/sorority sister was talking to me about how she used to do triathlons but can't anymore because she had surgery on her foot and how I was with not running and I just got really sad about it.

I really honestly have no motivation to workout when I can't run. I feel so stupid going to the gym at my school. I don't know why, it just doesn't feel like a good place to workout for me. It's hard to explain.

And I know that I can't do anything until I see the doctor next week, but it's killing me. Really. 

I know none of the other guards care what people look like in the suits. It doesn't really matter. But I feel like it matters and add that into my no running depression and I'm just totally bummed now and I hate it.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

a little update

I forgot to tell y'all. Since I ended up taking the practical today (see last post) I wasn't able to see my sports/ortho doctor today. 

I rescheduled and I'm seeing the PA (who oddly enough rehabbed my brother when he broke his ankle way back in the day) next Friday morning bright and early. My mom is going with me. And I will absolutely NOT being running until I see him. It's rough, but I think I really need to force myself into it.

I'm going to continue swimming and doing light weight workouts. I'm going to take it easy on the cardio stuff. 

Also, I'm going to be THAT girl. I'm totally going to wear a sport bra under my dress for formal dinner. Don't nobody got time for a realy bra/putting effort into their appearance.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

PRACTICAL COMPLETED. And a reward of laying out for an hour in my new bikini!

I promise these pictures make me look a lot tanner than I actually am. And I was listening to one of the girliest playlists that I could find.

Tonight is Formal Dinner (CHICKEN FRIED STEAK!!!!) and open lap swim at 8. And inbetween I need to write an extra credit paper and do my course evaluations.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

Also, my dog is camped out on my parent's Sleep Number bed because they took away his dog bed in their room. My mom and I can only guesstimate that his best sleep number is somewhere around 55. He's a pretty balanced pup.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

I have about 15 hours to learn all of this and know cat muscles like the back of my hand. (I'll spare you the pictures of the dissected cat.) Pray for my soul. Four days of classes. Then four finals next week.

[thefiveftrunner-blog]

I've got my favorite jeans on and I just finished my last "test" before finals. Happy Monday, friends.