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5 years
I’m pretty sure some of us already have their own plan for the next 5 years. Well, I have mine too but now another 4 years left. For the past 1 year, i couldn’t achieved what i’d planned due to some reasons. 2016 has become the toughest year for me but i still manage to go through it. What i would like to achieve for another 5 years? 1) Of course i want to have a good job since i spent my 5 years to complete my diploma and degree. yeahh yeahh. i know. it’s just diploma and degree but did you know that i spent almost 50k to complete my studies? Therefore, to find a good job is a must for me. Client servicing has been my first choice if i want to apply for a position in the advertising agency. I prefer to move around and talk instead of sitting in front of the laptop and day dreaming. My idea and creativity is quite limited. That’s the reason one i didn’t apply creative designer’s position. In the working life, i have to be serious so i won’t get bored and regret with my choices. 2) To owned a shop or a cafe. It has been my dream to run my own shop or cafe. I would love to create something that is not in Malaysia and only my shop is the only one they could have. What is it? I won’t share it at here. haha. After 4 year, i think i could achieve this. I’m pretty confident with this. The shop or cafe plan is almost finished. Just wait for the right time to run it. Wish me luck! 3) To be more fashionable. Sounds weird? Yeah! Sounds weird to me too. haha. I bet you must be wondering, why after 5 years then i wanna be more fashionable. The answer is simple. If i want to be more fashionable, i would love to use my money from head to toe buy the stuff that i want. It feels better to buy using your own money and not your parents or your husband’s money. To be honest, there’s a looooooooot of thing i wanna buy. hehe. 4) Get a PURRFECT body before i get married. Yes! i want to have my old body which was in 2006. That’s the ideal and perfect body for me. The main problem right now is i can’t resist my accepting any foods that people offered me or mom’s cooking. Another reason is i want my husband to lift me on the wedding day or during the pre-wed photoshoot session. hahaha. Ehem! 5) Last but not least, to get married with someone that i love. Actually, it was my dream to get married at age 23 which is now. Maybe i have no luck yet. I was so happy when few of my friend already found their soulmate and some of them already tied their knots. Jealous? Kinda. A bit. Who didn’t jealous with it, i think they are weird. If by 25 i still didn’t get married, i’m going to push myself to get married after 28. Why? I think after 25 is the best age for me to focus more on what i have and expand more if needed. To marry someone that i love, it will be the greatest gift from god. I want to have his children, getting old together, lived together, having fun together and everything with him. Hmm, i always day-dreaming about that one fine day. So that’s the 5 years plan that i want to achieve. Love by, The Kitsune Hime
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Rainy Day
People said that sometimes rainy day reflect our feeling. Is it true? Well to me, maybe. I think it’s been 3 days straight, Kuala Lumpur is crying. The mood of Kuala Lumpur is gloomy and cold. As if they are sad and upset about something. Sometimes, a loud sound made by the thunder can be heard. It feels like they are angry about something. I sit near the balcony with my laptop on and accompanied by a cup of coffee. Looking at the gloomy weather, and a big sigh come out from my mouth. I began to write, but as i put my finger on the selected alphabet, i stop. “What should i write?” “What should I start with?” I look again at the sky, I see nothing. My heart feels empty. My mind is blank. Dreamy. Dreaming about my future. My soul began to freely moving, dancing and ..... I feel like being pulled. The dreams, faded to black and .... I’m back. I can feel my tears drop one by one. “Why am I crying again?” It still raining. “Are they crying for me too?” My eyes close for few minutes. I take a deep breath and start my writing. “Rainy Day”. A good start for my stories. Love by, The Kitsune Hime
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Missing the Person
What will you do if you miss someone? Are you going to call? text? meet? or just imagine the person you miss? Is the person special to you? How do you feel if you get to let the person know that you miss him/her? To me, i have a special dear that i miss so much. I will try to find a way to tell him that i miss him. What did i do? Sometimes i called him or texted him. That’s the only way that i could express my feeling towards him. We rarely meet. I don’t know why but when i asked him out, he will came out with thousand of reasons.
To be honest, i’m a bit sad when he doesn’t want to see me. I did asked him why but he never gave me the answers. Sometimes, i think, “Is he afraid of other people seeing us?” or “Is he ashamed of me?” Those negative thoughts, always makes me become more worst.
Since we’re no longer together, I find some excuses that can make me text him. I can no longer say that “I miss you” to him anymore. Only by texting him, and had fight with him, that’s the only way i could release the feeling of missing him. When you didn’t let out your feeling, your chest hurt as in it is the same as heartbroken feeling. It will be more painful if you see him/her right in front of you but you couldn’t talk, look, touch, kiss or hug the person you miss so much. Your chest will feel burn. The feeling is torturing you. Your heart is in pain. Same goes to me. I miss the good moment between me and him. I miss the way he smiled at me, he stared at me, he looked at me, he touched me, he hugged me, his voice, he told me that he love me and everything that relates to him. I miss every single thing about him. Even though there are no knots between us, That feeling of missing the person you love, never dies. It will always be in my heart. When you truly love that person, no one can replace his place. Actually, It is not bad missing the person you love. With love, The Kitsune Hime
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Marriage?
Have you ever think about marry with someone you didn’t love? Well, i might be experience it since my heart still belongs to somebody else for now. In future? We won’t know. My grandma recently asked my mom about me. Did i date someone? How was my relationship with the guy i dated. I’m not sure what answered my mom gave to my grandma. She proposed to my mom about this one guy. Well, he is 12 years older than me. I can call him uncle. This year i turned 23. Everyone is worried about me for not getting married. It’s funny you know. I had a plan actually. I wanted to marry with someone that i love. But maybe when it comes to relationship or love. I’m a bit unlucky. My relationship with the man that i love didn’t work that well. Due to some problems that couldn’t be solve by both of us. Since i’m experiencing the same pain and being heartbroken. Without thinking straight, i told him that i’m going to accept my grandma’s choice. I think he’s hurt with my decision.
To think it back, being or living with someone that i never knew or love, kinda hurting me too. but maybe for a while i guess. What i meant by hurt is, I won’t be seeing the man i love when i woke up, his smile, his hug, his voice and everything that is related to him. It won’t be the same. That will be a major problem that i have to face. My grandma is coming next month. i’m about to give her my answer. Once i give it, there will be no turning back. It’s hard to make a choice. We’ll see.
With love, The Kitsune Hime
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To Love Someone?
To be loved or to love? It should be both and should be commit by both side too. To love someone, make sure you have prepare yourself for any consequences that will be created by your partner. Of course, your ego must be lowered.
If you love someone just because you want to fill her/his in your free time, or afraid other guy/girl will snatch him/her from you or maybe you just want to keep him/her until you’re ready, my advise is better don’t do that. You will hurt their feelings.
Both of you have to consider few things in relationship. Both of you need to have a mutual understanding. Both of you should not let ego control the demon inside you. Both of you can’t be selfish. Bear in mind, to love someone is also about building a trust. Do not waste the trust he/she gave it to you by hurting him/her with cheating or lying or choose other guy/girl instead of the one you love. If that happens, ‘a final goodbye’ is waiting for you. Make sure if you want to love someone, loves him/her as much as you love yourself. Love, The Kitsune Hime
*noted: pictures aren’t mine. credit to the owner
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Home
It feels good to be home. It feels good to have your bed, pillow, blanket. It feels good to see your mom, dad and siblings.
Few years ago, i realized i’m a home-type person. I preferred to spent all my time and days at home. Well, there’s a lot of things i can do at home. When i was at young age, i always argued with my mom. Telling her that i don’t like to spent my time only at home. To think it back, It feels so funny. Maybe i wasn’t thinking straight at that time. I spent most of my time at home right now. Watching anime, movies. Listening to old and new songs. Reading comics and novels. Write up my story on my favorite diary and tumblr.
When i feel happy, i will baked cakes or cookies. When i feel sad, I slept for a few minutes and then starting to baked and write all the thought.
Home is like a heaven to me. Doesn’t matter how far i am, my mind and heart will always think and be at home. Love, The Kitsune Hime
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Her hair is on my hair wishlist. Her boyish cut doesn’t make her look like a boy/guy/man. The feminine look is still there. and still have the cuteness.
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Can’t Wait
I can’t wait to end my degree. This upcoming March will be the second last semester before i go for intern on July (i guess). There are a few intern places that i wished to be part of them. Which position i should apply? Hmm. I’m still not sure but i’d been thinking of Client Servicing. Wait for this upcoming semester.
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youtube
This song keeps on playing in my mind again and again. I love her voice!
(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpbQ4I3Eidg)
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Broga Hills
It’s been a while i didn’t do any outdoor activities. I spent most of my time eating, sleeping, driving and doing my assignments. So, recently i gained weight. I don’t feel like myself anymore. The trip to Broga Hills is under my university’s club. They planned to do the Ad-stream event which was being opposed by me a lot of time. Well, I don’t like any outdoor activities after i graduated from highschool. Last Saturday, i joined the group to Broga Hills. A day before i didn’t have enough sleep. So, i went to Shah Alam with Ash around 10 pm after bought few things. As soon as we arrived, went to Dora’s house and fetched her. We stayed at the ‘mamak’ until 2.30 am. At 3 am, we started our journey. My eyes feels heavy as if there are monkeys hanging at my eyelashes. Told them not sleep or else i’ll be sleeping too. We laughed, talked and sang. I drove 115km/h. Broga Hills is quite far. We arrived around 4.10 am. Waited for my another lecturer. People starting to walk to the heavenly hills. Walked for 500 metres, my head starting to feel dizzy. I feel like the Naan Butter i ate that morning wanna came out. I started to feel regret for joining the trip. I told myself that “You’re fit!” A good motivation from friends and lectures, i managed to climb till the 3rd checkpoint. I gave up to continue climbing. My heart beats fast. My body was showered with sweats. My eyes half-opened. Me and the others waited for the rest to came down. I didn’t see the sunrise. But i managed to took beautiful pictures and appreciate the beautiful scenery. Now is the time to go back. On my way to go back to where i belong, suddenly a girl pulled me as she fell down. This time, my heart beats real fast. I thought i’m going to die. “I still want to live”. That the only sentence that keep on repeating came out from my mouth. The whole body of mine shaking. We went to Fareez Corner and had our breakfast there. On our way back, while driving i slept. Not just closing my eyes but i slept for few seconds. I didn’t realized. Thank goodness Dee wakes me. My car almost hit the divider. I’m lucky that another accident didn’t happened. I apologize to my friends for endangered their life. I learned a lesson which i need to have enough sleep before doing all the activities. Well, that hiking activities will be the first and the last. Love, The Kitsune Hime
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End of January
Hello and good afternoon. How was your day and superb great Sunday?
So, since the beginning of the year 2017, people was hoping for many things. Good and changes. It’s almost the end of January.
How is it so far for you guys? How was your 2017 started?
My years of 2017 doesn’t start in a good way.
Would love to hear it from you. :)
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