themessangeranon

[themessangeranon]

You're Sensational

The late summer air hung thick over the Sussex countryside, golden and silent, save for the occasional flutter of birds singing a lullaby in the upcoming dusk. Lizzy Elmsworth was wandering the old estate garden, the hem of her linen dress occasionally getting caught on stray leaves and sticks on the path.

She twirled absently in her fingers a broken flower, picking off the petals and letting them sway to the ground.

The letter Guy had given her burning a hole in the pocket of her dress. She had been worried about Nan recently ever since she had come to visit her newlywed friend. She knew her heart was with Guy but didn’t she have at least a feeling with Theo?

She couldn’t imagine feeling upset while married to a Duke, and a handsome and sweet one at that. She debated with herself over whether or not to give Nan the letter. Would it only make her pain worse?

Lizzy was somewhat thankful she wasn’t in love. She didn’t have to deal with the pain of heartbreak or betrayal. Though, it was quite lonely… and love did give one a sense of purpose. To want to make someone happy and—

The crunch of gravel made Lizzy jump and drop the bereft stem. She turned around to find the source of the noise only to be relieved at the sight of her best friend’s new husband. He seemed taller than she remembered despite the fact she had seen him just a couple of weeks ago.

“Theo, you scared me.” Lizzy embarrassedly chuckled. “I thought you were a bear or something.” She didn’t actually believe that the noise would have resulted from a bear, she couldn’t admit to anyone after the disaster that was telling Jinny that she was terrified of the mere presence of Seadown.

Theo laughed under his breath, “I never thought I could pass for a bear, I think I’ll take that for a complement.” He smiled at her charmingly before walking over to her side. “I’ve been looking for you, I wanted to ask you something if that was alright? If you would rather walk alone I will leave you.” He gave her a look as to say ‘don’t have me go.’ It worried her a little.

“No, no I’m fine. You’re fine. What’s the question?” She stumbled out.

“Just that I would like you to stay a bit longer. I’m concerned about Nan. I’ve passed by her room a couple times and have heard sobbing, her sobbing. I wonder if she thinks she made a mistake by marrying me and letting go of Guy. It hurts me that she’s hurting. I just…I just wish I knew how to help her. I don’t even know if being around me would even make her feel better. I’m scared that would make it worse. My wife has a broken heart.”

Lizzy looked up into Theo’s eyes and saw his eyes watering, devastated by his wife’s unhappiness. Lizzy’s fingers brushed against the edge of the envelope, stiff and accusing in her pocket. The paper felt heavier now, as if it knew the weight of its contents and the havoc it could wreak.

She looked back up at Theo, his brow furrowed, lips pressed tightly together, the usual confidence in his voice now replaced with an aching uncertainty.

“I don’t know what to say,” she admitted, voice barely above a whisper.

She didn’t mean to say it aloud. But it felt wrong to lie to him, especially when his pain felt so bare, so sincere.

Theo sat down on the low stone wall behind them and ran a hand through his hair. “I know I wasn’t what Nan expected. I tried to be. I still am trying. But lately she looks at me like she’s somewhere else. And I don’t know how to follow her there.”

Lizzy hesitated, then moved to sit beside him. She didn’t speak right away. Instead, she looked out at the garden, wild with overgrown hedges and late-blooming roses that bent toward the waning sun. Everything in this place felt like it was teetering at the edge of something. Summer giving in to fall. Bloom giving way to rot.

“Sometimes,” she said slowly, “people make choices because they think it’s the right thing. Not because it’s what they truly want.” He turned to her, brows raised.

She tried to keep her voice steady. “That doesn’t mean you’re not worthy of love, Theo. Or that you’re the problem.”

There was silence. A long, stretching pause between them. “You are kind. And you listen. That’s more than most men ever offer.” Theo looked away again, but not before she saw something flicker in his expression, something like gratitude, or maybe longing. It made her chest ache.

Her hand hovered again at her pocket. “I—” she began, but faltered. Theo looked at her, waiting.

Lizzy stood up. Too quickly.

“I should go,” she said, brushing off the back of her dress. “Nan’s probably waiting for me.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Theo said, rising beside her. “Will you stay?”

She looked up at him, the dying sun catching in his hair, turning it to gold. He looked like something out of a half-remembered dream—familiar, safe, yet suddenly unreachable.

“I’ll stay,” she said finally, quietly. “As long as she needs me.” Theo gave a small, sad smile.

“Thank you.”

She looked at him one last time, then turned back toward the manor. The letter stayed tucked in her pocket, warm against her skin, like a secret she wasn’t ready to betray.

Not yet.

<3

Nan sat at her vanity, the brush dangling forgotten in her hand. Her reflection looked foreign lately. Too still. Too composed. The kind of woman she used to pity, trapped in a grand house, with expensive silks and a hollow heart.

She pressed her lips together and forced herself to keep brushing, as if the routine might tether her to something real. Something she could control.

The door to her room was closed. She preferred it that way now. It felt like a small, defiant boundary in a world where her choices had begun to unravel behind her. The lace curtains fluttered slightly in the evening breeze. Somewhere down the hall, the sound of Theo’s voice echoed faintly and then faded.

Nan stilled.

She hadn’t cried today. Not yet.

But her chest ached in that too-familiar way, the tight coil of guilt and grief and shame that no corset could hide. Her marriage was a performance now. The Duchess. The hostess. The trophy. But not the beloved.

She had believed she could choose the sensible path and be happy. That love would follow, like a loyal pet, if she just fed it patience and time. And Theo, sweet, thoughtful, safe Theo, had been everything her mother said she should want.

But at night, she dreamed of cliffs and crashing waves. Of fingers threading through hers on some hidden beach. Of freedom.

Of Guy.

A knock broke the silence.

She startled slightly. Then, too quickly, she composed herself; spine straight, hands folded in her lap. Duchess, not girl.

“Come in.”

It was Lizzy. Of course it was. Always Lizzy.

Her friend stepped in quietly, gently, as though the air might shatter around her. She carried something in her expression, something guarded and tight, but said nothing at first.

Nan smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Lizzy hesitated. “I ran into Theo. In the garden.” Something in Nan’s stomach twisted.

“Did he seem… alright?”

Lizzy shook her head too quickly. “He’s worried about you.”

Nan looked away. “He shouldn't be.”

There was a long pause. Lizzy didn’t sit down, didn’t speak. Nan could feel her fidgeting. the rustle of her dress, the way her hand hovered awkwardly near her side, as if holding something she didn’t know whether to reveal or conceal.

“He hears you crying, you know. Theo. He’s really concerned about you.”

“I just wish I knew where he is. I could at lease write him letters, make sure he knows I’m still in love with him.” Nan sobs.

Lizzy paled, her mouth parting ever so slightly. Nan studied her. “You know something.”

“No.”

The denial came too fast. Too rehearsed.

“Lizzy.”

Lizzy’s hand moved to the pocket of her dress again, almost instinctively. Then she stopped herself.

Nan’s heart skipped. “What is it?” she whispered. Lizzy opened her mouth, but nothing came. Her throat worked as she swallowed, eyes darting away.

And just like that, Nan knew.

There was something. Something someone had wanted her to see. Something Lizzy had kept from her.

Nan’s voice trembled, but her words were sharp. “Is it from him?”

Lizzy was frozen.

“Is it from Guy?” Nan asked again.

Silence.

Then finally, softly, almost brokenly, Lizzy whispered,

“Yes.”

Nan closed her eyes. A flicker of hope shone in her eyes. It was as if the floor beneath her had shifted, ever so slightly, like the moment before a storm finally breaks.

“He sent you a letter?” Nan asked, voice barely audible.

“Yes.”

“And you didn’t tell me.”

“I didn’t know if I should,” Lizzy admitted, voice cracking. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want to make your pain worse with Theo.” Nan stood, her breath shallow, hands trembling at her sides.

“Do you still have it?” Lizzy nodded slowly.

“Give it to me.”