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[theodoraflanigan]

thread: Drowning location: Red Lake status: closed thread w/ Theo & Jack, considered complete. Trigger warnings: topics of death, depression, suicidal ideation.

THEO

Theo was feeling restless, which seemed to be her new normal at this point, especially on her days off when she was left to find something —anything —to keep herself from milling around the main house, and venturing over to her Dad’s old veterinary clinic that had sat there closed for the past eight months. For whatever reason, maybe because today would have been his fiftieth birthday and she missed him so much she could barely breathe, or maybe something else entirely was driving her—and even though she had to drive past it every day just to pull out of her own property and had managed not to give into the urge—Theo had found herself finally stopping and going inside.

Big mistake. Huge. All of the grieving she hadn’t allowed herself hit her like a train and she found herself on the floor unable to stop violently screaming and sobbing. The brunette had no concept of how much time had passed, once she was all cried out, Theo simply picked herself off the ground, threw some water on her face, locked the door and jumped up into her SUV and started to drive. She was in a weird daze, no real destination in mind —but soon she found herself at Red Lake. She parked the vehicle close to the water's edge and got out, still in some weird mental fog, keys still in the ignition while she stood and stared at the lake for a few seconds, the damn tears once again stinging her eyes, she just needed to do something to make it stop.

October was well past the time of year that sane people went swimming and right now Theodora was anything but sane. All she could think was that the sting of the cold water might somehow wash away all the emotions flooding her system, and at the very least being chilled to the bone would be a distraction. Before she could process anything or talk herself down, Theo found herself rushing toward the water —she didn’t even realize anyone was around, nor that the violent sobbing had begun all over again as she plowed her tiny form, fully clothed into the chilly waters, waded in up to her chest before intentionally diving under, disappearing into the murky lake water.

JACK

Grief was an interesting beast. Some days he found himself steady, that beast lying dormant making it easy for him to forget it was even there. He'd be able to do things like eat, sleep, work. It always came as a cycle, for a few weeks he would be fine, decent, able to work like any normal person within the town. Then it would hit him like a ton of bricks, that beast coming out of it's hole to terrorize him once again. During these times he struggled to get through the days sober; he wasn't much of a drinker normally, but since her death he found refuge with the bottle. He'd already done his daily binge a few days before, and now he could feel that heavy, unending weight of his grief lifting from his tired shoulders. It will lie dormant once again, until it decided it wanted to rear its ugly head again.

Today he found himself at the lake, he might have brought another bottle with him, but he'd left it within his car. Untouched and unopened, but there as a safety net if he felt he needed it. He was looking out over the lake taking in the beauty of nature, trying to use it's calming presence to ease the lingering grief when he spotted a truck. That wasn't what got his attention, no, it was the person who climbed out of it. Looking clearly distraught and familiar, the one he'd met at the bar, the one he'd been texting not too long ago. He understood her grief as his own, and wondered if she was also going through this cycle. That thought was soon answered as he saw her running towards the lake at full speed, "Theo!" He shouted, though nothing he would have said could have stopped her. He realized that as he went after her into the cold water of the lake.

He waded further out with intent just as she went under, he knew what she was trying to do, and he couldn't sit by and let it happen. He'd dive in after her, his arms wrapping around her before pulling her up. He anticipated that she might fight, but he held onto her still as he pulled her towards the beach. "Hey, hey. It's okay, it's going to be okay." He said, repeating it over and over.

THEO

The sting of the chill of the water hadn't quite had the intended effect—though it had been a definite shock to her system, Theo was a well shaken soda bottle of emotions and once the cap was off there would be no stopping the explosion this time. It wasn't that she wanted to die, of course she didn't, but she was just exhausted from the internal fight that was always going on deep inside and so she didn't fight the grip of the chilly waters that felt like it was holding her tight in place, making no effort to save herself just yet—maybe she hoped if she got so close to touching death she could see the other side, see that her mom and dad still lived on, on some other plane of existence but still with her here even if she couldn't hear or touch them. Maybe she could start moving forward with living, maybe she could forgive herself for not coming home when she was supposed to, for not being there to hold her father's hand as he left this life.

She had no concept of time, maybe her body was still in shock from the ice cold water, she couldn't have been under the water for more than a few seconds though it felt a lot longer when suddenly she felt strong arms encircling her body, pulling her up to the surface—her first instinct was to fight it—she hadn't gotten what she needed yet, not yet. Theo flailed against his hold, disoriented and shaking, choked sobs and screams of unintelligible words leaving her trembling lips—his grip never easing no matter how hard she struggled against it, his voice familiar and oddly comforting even as she continued fighting him all the way up until he'd managed to pull her up on the sand of the beach, only then did it click in her head what she had just done, and who it was who had gone in to save her from herself.

With the reality of what she'd just done sinking in, she stopped struggling and let herself cling to him for dear fucking life. "I- I'm s-sor-sorry," she managed to choke out, her body trembling from the cold and the sobs that refused to stop.

JACK

He wasn't a lifeguard, that really came to be true when she started thrashing around. He'd lost his foot a couple times in the effort it took him to get her to shore. He was wet, cold, but determined to get her as far away from the water as he humanly could. While he did he kept saying soft things, 'It's going to be okay,' and 'I'm here.' even if she couldn't actually hear him right in that moment. Eventually he'd get up onto shore then further up onto the grass falling easily onto his bottom with her coming down with him. It seemed in the time he moved she got more and more calm until she was clinging onto him. Sobbing, but still very much here and alive. "It's okay." He said, wrapping his arms around her. "You're alright, it's okay."

He held her close for as long as she would let him. Whatever it was she was going through right now he could understand. He'd been here on more than one occasion with his own grief. He'd do whatever he needed to help her even if that meant just sitting there until she was ready to move. "Theo." He'd say, "I know it's hard right now. I know it can seem never ending, but you aren't alone. You don't need to do this on your own." He said, softly, speaking into her hair a bit. "I'm here for you, whenever you need me to be."

THEO

She was exhausted from the whole ordeal, between the crying fit on the clinic floor, and fighting Jack's grip and the cold of the water all of Theo's fight was gone. Her body shivering in his arms, glad for his comforting presence and the soft kind words he spoke, she almost believed everything was going to be all right. "I don't know h-how to do this at all." she confessed for the first time to herself or anyone else for that matter. "I- I didn't want to die... I promise, I just needed to feel something else... anything else than all this grief." she forced out between tiny gasps for air, her fingers curling around the fabric of his shirt. "How do I make it stop? I need it to stop, I'm not equipped for this.. this isn't me, Jack. I lost me when I lost them..." It wasn't easy for her to admit, but Jack made her feel safe, like she was allowed to break and he wouldn't look down on her for it, and more to the fact, that he understood what she was going through.

[theodoraflanigan]

Even the beautiful girls with the beautiful smiles always has a breaking point.

[theodoraflanigan]

Text thread. ft @theodoraflanigan Avery asks Theo for help. 

Keep reading

[theodoraflanigan]

[theodoraflanigan]

chieframos​:

Julian was sure to give her the same deep soul look as he stared at her. “Oh so that’s not the way to your heart?” He made sure to nod along taking the hit to his ego on the chin as she insulted him. Guys like him loved girls who gave him shit. “You saying I don’t need a line means I could just sit here and stare into those gorgeous eyes and be coming home with you in an hour. Maybe I just like to work for what I want.” He said slyly back to her.

“Bold of you to assume I have a heart.” She responded with a smirk and a little shrug of her shoulders. Honestly she wasn’t trying to be insulting, Theodora was just not the sugar coat it type of girl, and she had a tendency to be overly snarky of late. “That would depend on my mood at the end of the night, but who knows, maybe.” It was pretense, she’d take just about anyone home to avoid having to be there alone, it was kind of becoming a real problem. “Oh do you? All right then, let’s see what kind of game you really have then.”

[theodoraflanigan]

chieframos​:

open to all: @edgewaterstarters​

“C’mon say it, I clean up nice.” It wasn’t often to find Chief Ramos without a little bit of dirt on him or at least his badge present on his chest. The occasion called for him out of his navy blues but he didn’t mind if beer or pizza was involved. “You say it and then I promise I’ll give you a couple thousand compliments cause g’damn – if I could explain to my momma what beauty was… you might be on top of that list.”

Sometimes there were just nights that Theo wondered what the hell she was doing waiting tables at Rammer Jammer when she had spent eight years to earn her DVM and a beautiful veterinary clinic sitting empty that her daddy had left to her —especially in moments like this. While he definitely did clean up nice, and she would hit it in a second —having to fluff another male ego tonight was really just not on her ‘to-do’ list. “Does that line really work for you?” She responded, crinkling her nose as she continued to look him up and down, enjoying the view. “Not that you need a line, but seriously? Please tell me that’s not your go-to.”

[theodoraflanigan]

texting - ft. greyson

THEO

TEXT: hey! i'm in need of a private session, when can you fit me in?

GREYSON

text: I think I could fit you in either Monday or Tuesday. Would that work for you?

THEO

TEXT: i'm antsy af, so if monday is the soonest, then fine, monday it'll have to be. what time?

GREYSON

text: I have  spot Monday morning. Do you want the session with a particular trainer?

THEO

TEXT: monday morning, ok. yes, the particular trainer that i am currently texting with, duh.

GREYSON

TEXT Oh, you want to work out with me?

THEO

TEXT: yes, i want you.

GREYSON

TEXT: what exactly are you hoping to do when you come Monday?

THEO

TEXT: what is it you think i want?

GREYSON

TEXT: yes TEXT: what do you want

THEO

TEXT: what are you saying yes to? i was asking you what it is you think I want? TEXT: i was under the impression you were the best personal trainer to ask for, but if you're not up for challenge of a five foot three female, i guess you can just get one of your better trainers to handle the job?

GREYSON

TEXT: I wanted to know what you wanted exactly TEXT: I am the best, not saying that the other ones here aren’t just as good. Don’t worry about that, I think I can handle you just fine, Miss Theodora

THEO

TEXT: some aerial work, then maybe something a bit rougher. TEXT: i'm sure. well, that remains to be seen, doesn't it? and i prefer Theo, Sir.

GREYSON

TEXT:  that’s all, then? TEXT: rough I’m sure can be arranged text: calling me sir won’t be needed, Theo

THEO

TEXT: i wouldn't say that's all, it's a start and see what i'm up for from there. TEXT: good, the rougher the better. TEXT: then i'll go with Greyson, because i sure af am not going to call you master.

GREYSON

TEXT I’d like to imagine anything else that you might have in mind TEXT: I won’t hold back then TEXT: fuck, please don’t. That’s saved for the bedroom.

THEO

TEXT: i just bet you would. TEXT: i'll hold you to that. TEXT: you'd have to be the best fuck of all time for that word to ever leave these lips.

GREYSON

TEXT: don’t you worry TEXT: I’m sure I could make that happen

THEO

TEXT: we shall see. game on, Greyson!

[theodoraflanigan]

Thread: Prelude to a Kiss Location: Kissing booth, Edgewater Flower Festival Status: Closed thread w/ Nathan & Theo (small appearance by Sam) || complete.

Nathan

He had heard Theodora was back in town and had applied to the kissing booth. He had always been aware of her, being one year older in a small town made sure that you at least knew each other, but he never really talked to her or got to know her. This probably wasn't the best location to meet each other for the first time, but he had promised himself that he would at least greet her if he had the chance, and now he had the chance. He straightened his flower crown, dropped off his donation and walked to her booth.

"Hey Theo, haven't seen you in a while, do you still remember me?" He said grinning. God he felt awkward just standing there, this really was a bad idea.

THEO

Theo had been home for awhile now, the first few months she didn't really do the social thing. Losing her parents had been the worst thing that had ever happened to her and she was still struggling to find ways to cope with that. At first it was isolation, she just couldn't deal with the sad eyes people would give her and the 'sorry for your loss' comments—she didn't want the reminders, and she hated the sympathy brigade. But for the past few months she had been out and about quite a lot, even taking a waitressing position at Rammer Jammer to keep busy away from home, not that she needed the money—her dad had left her well taken care of, but the solitude got old and Theo had always been a very social girl, so it worked well as a coping mechanism.

Today she was volunteering her time and her lips to the kissing booth at the Flower Festival—and damn she was enjoying the hell out of it. Honestly, there were so many gorgeous people in this town and she was down to kiss them all. Edgewater was such a small town, she pretty much knew most everybody, even if vaguely—so when Nathan approached her booth, she knew she knew that face, probably a former classmate—it was just gonna take a minute or two for it to fall into place. And he addressed her by name, so yep, definitely had to have at least crossed paths more than once. It just wasn't all rushing back, but he was quite attractive, slightly awkward, but she liked his smile.

"I do and I don't," she admitted when asked point blank if she remembered him, which of course made her feel bad. "I know I know your face, but I cannot for the life of me put a name to it. I'm sorry, I've always been the worst with names. We went to school together, right? Please tell me I at least am remembering that correctly." she crinkled her nose as she offered an apologetic smile as she looked up at him.

Sam

Sam was in a sleeveless shirt and shorts and sandals, because Sam? Dress like he meant it? Never. Still, he was leaning on the booth table and calling to people as they passed. He even made kissing noises because Sam had no dignity whatsoever. He looked over and heard Theo, who he'd just met, talking up a customer and he chuckled. "You going to kiss her?" he asked and then snorted at them before waving at a person walking bye. "Kiss a blond prince! Come on, don't I look the part?!"

Nathan

Nathan figured she wouldn't be in the mood to be reminded of anything sad, so instead of giving her a way too late 'I'm sorry' he just grinned at her honesty. "That's alright, we were in school together yeah, but our social circles never really overlapped. If this town had been any bigger, or had more going on, I would not be able keep track of everyone and everything. You always seemed like a nice person to meet, if you don't mind my directness, but I've never had any chance to, so when I saw your name on the kissing booth list I figure, might as well drop by and say hi." He smiled. Was he rambling? He probably was rambling. Better wrap up the rambling and let her talk.

"How are you enjoying your flower festival so far? Isn't it great? I'm running a small booth right around the corner there, where I sell people's second hand books. You can drop off any book you have finished, we'll discuss a price, I add a few cents or a dollar and then, once the festival is over you can pick up the unsold books and the money you've made. It's going great, we've sold a pretty few books already, people here are reading quite interesting books, even bought two myself." Yup, still rambling. "Wait, fuck. I'm Nathan. Hi, nice to meet you."

THEO

Theo's brows raised slightly as he began to ramble, a very amused smirk playing on her lips—usually she was the one speaking in run-on sentences with people looking at her like there were comic book style speech bubbles forming above her head—so this was what it was like to be on the other side of a convo with a flibbertigibbet. Huh. It was sweet really, she wondered if he was always this verbose or if he was just nervous, he looked kind of nervous—did she make him nervous?

Her eyes flicked over to Sam upon hearing him ask whether or not he was gonna kiss her, Theo front teeth dug into her lower lip to stifle the giggle attempting to escape as her eyes flicked back to his—a barrage of questions and info all flowing out of him without pause for her to respond to any of it, her head just lightly nodding as she waited for him to just take a breath.

He finally got around to giving her his name, and before he could launch into another nervous ramble Theo propped herself up on her tip toes, reached over the booth divider to grab him by the front of his shirt, tugging him down to her eye level and let her lips collide with his, her fingers tightening against the fabric of his shirt as she kissed him for a good long moment before pulling back, gently sucking his lower lip as she did so. "Hi Nathan. It's nice to meet you too. Finally." she breathed as she released her grip on his shirt and let her heels touch the ground once again. "Oh, and I never mind directness. The festival is fantastic, and maybe I will swing by and check out those books of yours..."

Nathan

God he was a mess, why did he get like this around women? She probably was annoyed by him already, though as he looked at her, she seemed more amused than annoyed. He gasped in surprised as she reached over to him and pulled him over the divider, he leaned into the kiss, damn she was a good kisser. The way she pulled his lip got him more excited than he would ever admit. She knew what she was doing and she was good. He missed her touch as soon as she released the kiss, he tried to hide his blushing, but it probably was useless.

"I... uh... Yeah, you totally should we've got a lot of great books lined up, some real classics you should have read at least once in your life, and a whole lot of different kinds of thrillers, romance novels, sci-fi. Whatever your style is, we've got it!"

[theodoraflanigan]

biggest regret?

“even though it was pretty much out of my control because, hey life happens, but my biggest regret was that i didn’t make it back to Edgewater in time to say goodbye to my Dad before he left this world.and maybe that i didn’t spend enough time with my mom or appreciate her when she was still here. so there, you got yourself a twofer for your downer of a question. thanks for that.”

[theodoraflanigan]

xxjack·:

One thing Jack knew about himself was his inability to sit idly to himself especially when there was someone near him. He enjoyed talking just a bit too much despite how reserved he actually came across. He was at a bar, that’s what you did at these sort of venues. Strike up conversations with random people who also stumbled into the bar, even if it didn’t go anywhere afterward. “No set plans, but I have a feeling I’ll be staying a while.” He says, lifting up his glass to take a sip from it. With his insomnia he’d end up spending the night up anyways, might as well do that where he’d have decent amount of fun and the alcohol wasn’t too bad. “And they kicked me out of the library, apparently you’re not allowed to stay there over night even if you are, technically, working.” He chuckled, “No real break from work for a teacher, I suppose.”

In all honesty, Theo didn’t mind the sudden random conversation, if she had been feeling like her old self instead of being in this icky depressive headspace she found herself in of late—she would have been the one to start it up herself, so she was grateful for it. It didn’t hurt that the man was more than easy on the eyes, added points that he was clearly a good ten years her senior—maybe this night wasn’t going to completely suck after all. At the very least, at least she wouldn’t be left alone with her own thoughts for a little while. Theo found herself quirking a brow—Did he really just say he’d been kicked out of the library? That was definitely different. Of course he closed with info that made it make sense. “So you’re a teacher? I could make a Van Halen reference right now, but I will refrain... for now.” she smirked playfully. “I’m Theodora, by the way, and yes, I was named after the character in The Haunting of Hill House, my middle name is even Eleanor, not many people would appreciate that little anecdote, but I figure a book nerd like yourself just might, so yeah.”

[theodoraflanigan]

if you won the lottery what would you do with the money?

“i don’t know, depends on the amount? but my parents left me pretty well off, so i would invest some of it, help out some friends who aren’t as financially stable as i am, and probably donate a fair bit to different charities. i’ve learned over the past few months that money and things really can’t make you happy, so there would be no reason to be a hoarder or a spendthrift, you know?”

[theodoraflanigan]

top five subs you want to get to know more?

“let’s see,hmmm... Greyson... oh, wait, forgot for a sec there that he’s not a sub, oops, my bad! right, subs... so aside from Mal and Bash, whom I know very well. i wouldn’t mind getting to know Sam he seems like a challenge i wouldn’t mind taking on. Nathan, he’s sweet and awkward, it’s kind of adorable. Minerva seems like she would be a lot of fun. Spencer, she’s super cute. and last but not at all least, Jack, he’s just..” *chef’s kiss”

@halliwellgrey @maldunn @bashxfrost @sammymelrose @nathandiaz @cvernim @spencerawlings @xxjack

[theodoraflanigan]

Ｄａｎｉｅｌｌｅ Ｃａｍｐｂｅｌｌ．

[theodoraflanigan]

xxjack​:

Location: Rammer Jammer Time: Night

He’d been holed up at the library for the most of the afternoon, bent over books as he worked on grading and lesson planning. He was kicked out once the place close which happened more often than not these days. Instead of going back to his small home he decided to drop by the bar. Aside from the library this was where he liked to hang out, in the late hours of the night when he was too wired from the day. Sitting himself up on a stool he waved down the bartender to order himself something strong, his back ached and needed something to loosen up his muscles and make his throat burn. He’d just gotten his drink when he noticed to person beside him. “Planning for a long night?”

It was Theo’s night off, and yet here she was hanging out at Rammer Jammer—why she had chosen here instead of The Outlaw? The reason was pretty damn basic. She was finding herself getting more than a little annoyed watching Mal’s interactions with other women,which meant she was probably getting a bit too attached to that damn Dunn boy and she couldn’t be having that right now. She was already making some damn poor decisions in life —whatever that thing she had with him was, she didn’t want to let a little thing like feelings fuck it up. She was nursing her third drink of the night —half zoned out, idly chewing on the end of her straw, bobbing her head to the beat of the 80′s tune playing on the juke —so it took her a moment to realize the man beside her was actually attempting to strike up small talk. “Hmmm.. me? Oh yeah, probably just camp out here ‘till close just as if I was on the clock, only a tiny bit drunker.” she smiled lazily, letting her eyes take in and memorize the new  handsome face. “How about you? Just passing through, or just settling in?”

[theodoraflanigan]

[theodoraflanigan]

flower festival look