thepurposedsailor

[thepurposedsailor]

Duality

I only have to drive Colorado Blvd. once a year now. I noticed some new restaurants that look delicious. I’ll have to try them another time… Same waiting room feet. New shoes. Same knots in my stomach. Familiar, known, jaded…unknown, new, naïve. Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. A new nurse named Jennifer. As always, the nursing staff are wonderful. She liked my tattoos. Her daughter…

[thepurposedsailor]

The Cost of ... Um ... All of October?

I look at my disfigured body… Time creates a distance but that is when time’s paradigm hasn’t been obliterated by trauma. This body I am forced to live in journeys with me in a new time paradigm. Years pass. Hair grows back. Statistics trend favorable. Yet my companion not-so-gently reminds me of its wretched grip. Stats or not, years won’t grow back what’s been amputated…literal or…

[thepurposedsailor]

The Cost of 9.19

Interesting to me that on the anniversary date of my total hysterectomy and oophorectomy, I had to drive by the medical center that, not only did I deliver my first baby at, but it was the center that housed the doctor that ultimately pressed for the removal of my uterus and fallopian tubes and my ovaries.  He took one look at my scans and one look at me and taking into consideration the worst…

[thepurposedsailor]

The Cost of 9.8

Body pains. Emotional funk. Stomach upset. Existential wonder. Constant as this is, some days it’s next-level loud. Today marks the anniversary of my bilateral mastectomy. The edges of the memories blur only a little due to time passing, but something like this……something so jarringly transformative…doesn’t exist in the normal construct of time.  These days are odd. I’m filled with complicated…

[thepurposedsailor]

Seven.

I saw an image. It’s August. My head is spinning. The image is of the famous statue of Juliet in Verona, Italy. The caption: “to be a woman….” People have nearly bore a hole in the bronze from touching her. This symbolizing so much.  Call me dramatic……… but the reality cannot be ignored. Look at her. Look at what it represents. The objectification. The taking. The display of disrespect. For me,…

[thepurposedsailor]

We.Simply.Don't.Actually.Know.

Hey! I’m back for a moment. Maybe two? Who knows. I had this really grand plan for my blog for 2024, each month following a similar plan and pattern, offering learnings in a predictable and palatable way, and well, I continue to learn to hold loose the plans I make. In years past I’ve been able to follow through on the designs set forth but this year I’ve derailed.  Ah well. There’s something…

[thepurposedsailor]

CTMT March 2024 :: AMPLIFY

What does CTMT mean? It means “Cancer Teaches Me Things” “There has been nothing like cancer to teach me about the things that matter. Things mattered before, sure, but different things matter and things matter differently now because cancer changes me.” – @thepurposedsailor   What are “the things”?? – It starts with HOW I pay attention. And then it’s what I pay attention to. What I keep. What…

[thepurposedsailor]

CTMT February 2024 :: DISCERN

What does CTMT mean? It means “Cancer Teaches Me Things” “There has been nothing like cancer to teach me about the things that matter. Things mattered before, sure, but now different things matter and things matter differently.” – @thepurposedsailor   What are “the things”?? – It starts with HOW I pay attention. And then it’s what I pay attention to. What I keep. What I give up. Who I am. How I…

[thepurposedsailor]

December has something to tell you…

Merry and Happy to you. Even if the words carry with them redefined meanings because of the complexities of their BothAnds. I hope for you that your 2024 can be filled with presence. With noticing. With curiosity. With mindfulness and intentionality for the moments. Let life change you. Wonder about what can challenge you.

https://www.thepurposedsailor.com/2023/12/the-purposeful-point-december-2023/

[thepurposedsailor]

The Purposeful Point :: November 2023

[thepurposedsailor]

The Purposeful Point :: October 2023

[thepurposedsailor]

The Purposeful Point :: September 2023

The significance of September. Altered. When vulnerability IS trauma. Tomorrow. The significance of September. This used to be a time of year that I yearned for. That moment when August turned September is the moment my heart felt light and my soul soared and my face smiled. I loved waking up on September 1 with my outfit already picked out and my nails already a perfect fall-toned hue with a…

[thepurposedsailor]

The Purposeful Point :: August 2023

The anniversaries don’t get easier. Time doesn’t actually heal all wounds….especially when time is fundamentally altered by forever change. August's message is a compilation of poems born from the depths of survival, hard truths, and brutal realities.

The Haunting. The Real. The Caution. The Toll. The Haunting The Ghost does not live controlled by time;ticking seconds to hours; days to years,birthday cake candles and calendar moments,seasons and sunrises, sunsets, and moon phases.Unobliged to obey, It makes Its own way. The Ghost doesn’t count the way that we do,liberated from how it goes 1.. to 2.. to 3.. to 4.., 5.. to 6.. to 7.., to…

[thepurposedsailor]

The pendulum swings  Swift and abrupt Between  I hate it here  And  INoLongerGiveAFk.

© @thepurposedsailor