thewonderousblahberry

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

If I see one more hateful post about Tyga and Kylie Jenner’s relationship, I’m gonna flip. Let’s get real. Age of consent doesn’t mean you can’t date someone younger than you, you just can’t legally screw them. However, age of consent differs by state and country. So in California they can’t legally have sex. The age of consent is 18. But let’s say they travel to New York. Since she’s 17 (their age of consent), it’s legal. Let’s say they decide to bang in Canada or Mississippi. The age of consent is 16 so again perfectly legal. My point: age of consent is essentially meaningless. It’s not even the same everywhere. Now I understand wanting to protect young people from being manipulated by older people, but as long as these two people are enjoying their time together without harming anyone else, is it really that big of a deal? Kylie is 17 years old. She’s not 12. She’s not some little girl who can’t make her own choices. Now if that relationship is what you people think, then she’ll just have to live with her choices like everyone else. Just chill people. And for the people who get mad about the family just looking the other way, maybe they do that because they see she’s happy and know she’s alright. Why the hell are we so focused on who’s screwing who in the first place? It’s ridiculous. You are looking in from the outside and want to act like you deserve a say in her life. Well guess what, it doesn’t work like that.

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

Help Me Pay for College

https://www.gofundme.com/jwcqhs 

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

So ready for this!!!

Avengers: Age of Ultron sneak peek on ABC

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

Awe <3

[thewonderousblahberry]

I love this!!!

nothing i do for the rest of my life will ever top this

[thewonderousblahberry]

[thewonderousblahberry]

TRIGGER WARNING: misogynoir, violence, harassment, sexual abuse, rape.

@HoodFeminism (which is @Karnythia's and @thewayoftheid's work) hosted a Twitter discussion regarding the stereotype of “fast tailed girls” that Black girls deal with primarily during adolescence, but certainly starts before that for many Black girls and continues well into adulthood (i.e. the Jezebel controlling image). I put many of the tweets shared in this discussion in a Storify: #FastTailedGirls: Examining The Stereotypes and Abuse That Black Girls Face though a few are included above.

"Fast tailed" girls: Black girls stereotyped as “hypersexual” beings and seeking sex whether or not they are sexually active. This stereotype is proliferated in the home (especially by some mothers and older women), within the Black community (i.e church, socially; especially by the Black men who abuse and by some Black male leaders who want this silenced) and amidst society itself (i.e. schools, media; because of racism and White supremacist notions of womanhood). These Black girls are viewed: as “adult” women “asking” for abuse,” as responsible for the abuse that primarily adult Black men inflict on them or coerce them into and often inflict without punishment let alone blame from the Black community (as “protecting” Black men from racism often takes precedence over any other intraracial issue); as providing consent simply by experiencing puberty (or not even experiencing puberty); as automatically heterosexual; as automatically culpable for any street harassment, physical violence, sexual violence or emotional abuse that they experience. A Black girl with confidence who speaks up for herself, wants to express her femininity visually, has a normal interest in boys, gets unwanted attention from adult men, and/or has male friends can easily be labeled as such. This stereotype sits in a binary opposed to “respectable" Black girls while both "types" of Black girls are regularly abused. It is the hatred of Blackness, womanhood and childhood (or rejection of a period of childhood actually existing for Black girls) intersecting in this dangerous stereotype.

Though difficult of course, this conversation was so important and I am grateful to Hood Feminism for their presence, in general, and for this conversation, specifically. It is important to discuss how within and outside of our communities internalizing the hateful messages about Blackness, womanhood and Black womanhood specifically has caused so much harm, much irreversible. What can change is how we think about ourselves as Black women, meaning ending shaming and ending buying into patriarchal binaries about Black girls and Black women while simultaneously protecting abusers. Have open conversations about how patriarchal masculinity is literally killing men, Black men in particular, and how while it is true that they are very much so oppressed via race, as all Black people are, they are also oppressors of Black women. Black women also support this structure when abusers are defended and protected and our truths and experiences are silenced by other Black women and anyone else among Black people; that has to end. Deconstructing and rejecting the way that racism, White supremacy, anti-Blackness and sexism create this stereotype for Black girls, ones that impact them inside and outside of the Black community.

The abuse has to end. The education has to be received. The compassion has to be shared. The unlearning has to commence. The truth has to be spoken, even if at 140 characters at a time. Even if in small groups and in supermarket aisles and schools and churches and anywhere. Black girls deserve better than this. Black women deserve more than the pain of the memories of abuse and the fear that another generation of Black girls will experience the same.

Information:

#FastTailedGirls: Examining The Stereotypes and Abuse That Black Girls Face - this is my Storify mentioned above; includes many tweets (including some of mine) by Black women who spoke out; includes tweets from a trans woman of colour (@HarmonyBabydoll) who added an important dimension to this conversation.

The Myth of “Fast Black Girls” by @LexiScorsese - inspired this conversation

Hood Feminism blog

Misogyny, In General vs. Anti-Black Misogyny (Misogynoir), Specifically

Black Men and Patriarchy, Intraracial Sexism and Misogynoir (multiple essays listing) 

Abuse Culture: Domestic Violence, Rape, Body Dehumanization and Street Harassment (multiple essays listing)

Patricia Hill Collins’ books: Black Feminist Thought and Black Sexual Politics speaks to the roots of this stereotype.

Womanism, Black Feminism and Race In Feminist Discourse (Updated)  (multiple essays listing) 

Keep learning, growing and healing. ❤

(Please leave content above intact if you reblog. Please take care before adding any comments to this post. It is very serious and very painful for many Black women. Victim blaming and statements supporting rape culture are unwelcome here by people who think they have a “right” to harm us because this conversation occurred publicly. Please be respectful.) 

[thewonderousblahberry]

Got me out of school and church so many times!

If you never used your period to get out of something you didn’t want to do, you’re lying.

[thewonderousblahberry]

TAG. You’re it! Simple rules. State 10 facts about yourself. Then go post this chain message in your 10 favorite blogs telling them they’re it ♡

1. My name is Jasmine

2. I am 22 years old

3. I'm a Senior in College

4. I work at Taco Bell

5. I eat a shit load of Taco Bell

6. I'm actually about to go there to get some grub in a few

7. I like to sing

8. I watch too much TV.

9. I think I'm pretty cool even though I'm the lamest person you could ever meet.

10. My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns hun. Seriously. I like big butts and I cannot lie.

<3

[thewonderousblahberry]