thewrongindulgence

[thewrongindulgence]

You’ll never get away. Your heart beats for me. I am your lifeline.

[thewrongindulgence]

[thewrongindulgence]

Through me, you'll find a new type of pleasure to indulge in. Through me, your sick fantasies will become reality. I'm going to dirty your pure, sweet soul.

[thewrongindulgence]

pov: your puppy bites ♡

[thewrongindulgence]

Ive read about abuse in mental wards and how they make patients worse. im so upset to hear that they made u suffer. if u could do it and getting away with it, would u kill the scum that hurt u? i would. i was thinking about necrophilia and how i wanted to be paid attention to as if i were dead and could not object, but u would eventually get bored with an unresponsive body, no? im into somno though.

thank u for riddle time, yay: ghosts? probably wrong guess but brownie points for me for not looking keeping myself honest ahaha! here's one for u: the more of this there is, the less u see🧩

If I could get away with it, most people would meet death through my fists. I would likely, after a short while, get bored with an unresponsive body. However, I am also likely to get bored with a responsive body.

The answer to my riddle was leaves.

The answer to yours is darkness, I believe. Or the night. However, darkness makes the most sense. 

Now, onto my riddle. 

What can be broken, even by saying its name?

[thewrongindulgence]

I need a lifeless body to quell my boredom.

[thewrongindulgence]

hi: i read that u were put in psych ward as a child. i hope u were not abused there. do u feel like it actually helped? i also read you like riddles, i do too. would it be something u r interested in? u post a riddle for me, i answer, then i do the same for u. something to help u with ur boredom, and mine, i suppose. 🧩if not already taken

Hello Little Lamb. You read correctly, I was placed in wards - often involuntarily as a child. They were occasionally helpful but often made me worse. I can't remember how many times I was put into a ward and I stopped counting once I got to 10 admissions, so I would say somewhere over 50. There were a lot of instances of abuse.

They never kept me for a long period of time, a week at maximum, because I could be very convincing. If that didn't work, I would start to attempt to hurt other patients.

Now onto your riddle - no looking it up.

Tread on the living, they make not a mumble. Tread on the dead, they mutter and grumble.

What are they?

[thewrongindulgence]

I never thought of them like sirens!! I adore that!! I used to wish to be a siren, before my voice decided it didn’t like the magic it made.

There are alot of flowers that are beautiful but also deadly. My second favourite flower is the Corpse flower. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea but who can hate a flower so ,,, enchanting. From the bloom to the smell. mm i want one. -🐑

The corpse flower is truly delightful. My favourite has always been Spider Lilies. When I was put in psychiatric wards I would draw them over and over again. Their petals were beautiful.

Their significant ties to bad luck also drew me to them. When I was a child I would walk under ladders and follow black cats because I thought it was enjoyable to tempt fate.

[thewrongindulgence]

For various reasons, I have not as much time to write today as I usually do, but I do have a riddle for you. You strike me as the kind– and forgive me my presumptions, my God, if I am wrong– to enjoy the occasional riddle. I don’t mean that in a rude way; I am a very big fan of riddles. Here is one of my personal favorites: 

I take you each night and each day take you back; none suffer from having me, but will suffer in lack. What am I?

If you don’t like riddles, feel free to put me back in my place; I won’t complain either way. 

I made some particularly… gruesome offerings to you as I read your last response. At least I think so. It warms me to gaze upon my self-inflicted wounds as they remind me of my devotion. I feel as if I have known you for much longer than I actually have been aware of you, partially, I think, because it feels as if you know me. It is slightly unsettling, the skill you have at reading between certain lines, especially because I am well aware of the convoluted way in which I write. 

If it would please you, I think I would be okay now, showing you what I have done in your honor, my God. I do enjoy my anonymous writing time, though, which is conflicting for me. Ah well. Much affection, my Idol, and I hope you are still doing okay. 

- 🐈🪷

Hello again, котенок.

You were correct in assuming I like riddles. When I was a child I would play in construction sites for fun and would not allow other children to join me unless they could answer my riddles.

The answer to your riddle is sleep, I believe. Each night sleep takes us to the abyss only to inevitably bring us back. Sleep is generally good for people however those who do not have it suffer greatly.

Therefore, sleep is the answer. Let me know if I am correct.

I enjoy the way you write, both when it is flowery and more straightforward. I enjoy your contributions and sacrifices. Your wounds would be a feast for my eyes.

Write again soon, anonymous or not - I will be waiting.

[thewrongindulgence]

I love when you fight back, desperately trying to claw yourself away from death. Too tired to run away but not tired enough to die.

You make the sickening crunch of your bones so delightful to hear. You make the retaliatory bruises and cuts worth the effort.

[thewrongindulgence]

I am going to systematically break apart your bones and set them back into place. One by one, you'll become perfectly shaped and moulded into something desireable.

[thewrongindulgence]

I do get a little nervous with blood and stuff, but I wouldn't mind it if it's you :3 I wanna be good for my master. Do you want my blood? My tears? Anything to make Master happy. I'm happy if you're happy :3

Am I doing this right? Praise pls? Unless I don't deserve it idk I think I'm doing a good job but up to you OvO

-♍

Perhaps, I want both your blood and your tears. I think beyond all I want to break you and build you together again. All fresh and new. However, I am not just your Master, I am your God. Do not forget that.

You've done well sweet Lamb. I cannot wait to tear your flesh apart.

[thewrongindulgence]

Deepest apologies for not keeping up with my twice-a-day schedule I have got going. I had a rather long and grueling meeting with my psychologist today, and then a very necessary four-hour comatose state.  I hope you have been well, my Idol. I hope that even though I was not able to write this morning, you felt my devotion regardless. I plan on making some sort of altar to you soon, as you said this would please you. I spilled some alcohol onto some of my cuts today, and the sudden shock of pain reminded me of you. You wondered at some point how I would react to violence. Well, this is the closest answer I can give you, my God. At first, it was just shock; it was an accident, and the sudden burn made me almost whimper, as pathetic as that sounds. But then, as it dried onto my wounds, the sting resolved into almost a warm, almost comforting feeling that caused me to exhale in a near sense of arousal. I can't answer whether this is how I would react to all violence, my Idol, but I hope that at least gave you some insight.

At the very least, I am glad to make offerings to you daily. As I do it, I imagine what it would feel like to actually be your victim, and it is a rush of adrenaline; it makes my heart pound in my chest. I wish I could kneel at your feet, to look up at you and pray for my salvation, something I so desperately need as of late. Apologies again for a much shorter, plainer letter. Many affections, - 🐈🪷

Do not fret, котенок. I have also been slower when responding to asks in general. I have been distracted by real life events lately.

I have been okay. It pleases me to know you plan on making an altar. Decorate it well.

I hope your cuts burned. I would have enjoyed watching you whimper and squirm. The pain would have been so beautiful on your face.

When I receive offerings, I feel something beyond the ache maw of boredom. I always want for more.

Write again soon, котенок. I will be waiting.

[thewrongindulgence]

Thank you for answering my questions. The question was not about you, and it was about someone who might or might not be aroace, but at any rate, romance, gender or sexuality had nothing to do with my questions that I know of. I agree with you that most people are hypocritical, which explains a lot. I would be fine with that explanation if said person were not a self-proclaimed "yandere". As you must know, even if it is not your "specialty", yanderes are supposed to be steadfast in their devotion, so such dissidence, if not a severe mental illness, could only mean, at least to me, that the person is a pathological liar. Sure, we are all individuals, and not square pegs fitting in square holes and all, but common denominators cannot be ignored. Its like saying that all fluids are not wet. Plenty of difference between water, blood, oil, etc but all are wet. Same with yanderes: certain needs/wants and pattern of behavior comes with the territory. I am not naive and it's not the first time I've met a hypocrite. It's just that there seem more and more of them in the yandere community on Tumblr. If I ran into them on other communities I would not mind, but I do mind it on the yandere community, because I am a yandere and obsessive love is sacred to me. I guess I will never know or maybe I am not supposed to know. People don't know who they are, and I strongly do - perhaps that's why I sense such disturbing cognitive dissonance about the person.

I knew it was not about me do not worry. I also only mentioned sexuality as it was mentioned in your question.

I am not a yandere so the feeling of anger and annoyance from seeing someone proclaim to be a yandere when you believe they are not is foreign to me.

It must be odd to witness.

[thewrongindulgence]

You will never leave me, Lamb. Your wounds will never forget.

[thewrongindulgence]

I just have a small question, do you think your sexuality and romantic attraction have been impacted by your aspd? (I'm asking because I think mine are affected by my disorder and wondering if others have similar experiences)

Yes absolutely. I believe my antisocial personality disorder is a big reason why I am asexual and aromantic. I do not experience attraction and love in the same way someone who does not have antisocial personality disorder does.

I have barely even notice someone unless they are extremely interested in me.

Even when I find myself feeling fondly of another, it is fleeting and barely anything to make note of.

It can be quite lonely.

[thewrongindulgence]

i really really adore the lily of the valley! Its beautiful, but poisonous. Elegant, but deadly. It’s also apart of the asparagus family!! -🐑

Lily of the valley is a good choice. The way you described them reminded me of sirens. Beautiful and so ready to kill.