things-i-heard-on-campus - Tumblr blog

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“Disappointment.”

“Already?”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“This sounds like Bo Burnham on crack, and he’s already on crack.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“He’s a certified DIY dad.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“Go to permanent sleep.”

“Permanent sleep is not a thing.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

"See? Good example. If y'all have a blood feud going on, I'm so sorry, but good example."

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

"Why do we know about the state of prisons in foreign countries?!"

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“I’m going to have to kill him. I love him dearly, but I’m going to have to kill him.”

“Murder is frowned upon in the United States of America, remember.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“Why use brain power when you have fire power.”

“It’s the American way.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

"Yes, I dyed my hair blonde as an excuse to be stupid. No, I was stupid before as well."

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

"The sink that fights back."

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“You get a lil’ trophy. A fake paper trophy.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“Raise your hand if you had fun … No you didn’t.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“Let’s let in that stranger danger. Unless it’s a stranger!!”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“I meant to romance one person, I romanced a different person, ‘cus I’m an idiot.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“The first playthrough I walked out completely bitchless.”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“You know when you have, like–”

“Do I wanna know?”

[things-i-heard-on-campus]

“Don’t make Mr. H bring the Nerf gun out.”

“I’d love to see that.”

“You would? I also have hot coffee.”