thisconsumingrot

[thisconsumingrot]

I feel that sometimes, as a community, we focus on the "little" part of the definition and forget that the "no" also exists

So, this pride month, I want to give a special shout out to my fellow adverse/repulsed arospecs and aspecs

Shoutout to all acespecs who experience no sexual attraction

Shoutout to all acespecs who don't want to have sex

Shoutout to all arospecs who experience no romantic attraction

Shoutout to all arospecs who don't want romantic relationships

Shoutout to all aroaces who experience no romantic or sexual attraction

Shoutout to all aroaces who don't want romantic or sexual relationships

Shoutout to all aspecs who don't want a relationship of any kind be it romantic, sexual or platonic

Your experience and your identity are not just some harmful stereotype, and you belong in aspec spaces just as much as everyone else.

Signed,

A sex and romance adverse aroace 💜🖤��🤍💚

[thisconsumingrot]

[thisconsumingrot]

Not all venom fans are monster fuckers 😞 some of us are just aroace disasters who like the idea of a platonic soulmate who likes to murder annoying people for you, is that so bad?

[thisconsumingrot]

anyway you should always remember that all those foreigners you see dying on the news are just as real people as you are who have just as much interiority as you do. there is nothing about you that makes you more important and it is by pure chance that you are not in their position. in fact, this holds for all of history. every person, no matter the horror of the fate that befell them, had just as much interiority as you do. i feel like some people haven't fully internalized this.

[thisconsumingrot]

[thisconsumingrot]

This is one of those things I think people just say as a way of dismissing people's feelings and opinions because a 13-year-old can talk about being in love with a boy, and it's fine to consider that a declaration of their heterosexuality, but when it comes to be aro/ace, there's suddenly a line.

And perhaps one of the biggest issues with this line is that it kind of leans into the argument of "too young to know what you want", and sure, it starts with being a minor, then it extends to anything else that's considered "too young". For example, I was recently in a very "inclusive" program with lots of people who were members of the larger LGBTQ+ community, and I remember talking about being aroace with them. One of them laughed and said, "You're still young. You'll find someone you love when you're much older."

Mind you, I am not a minor and far from being one. Also, this person was only two years older than me, but even then, in her perspective, I was "too young" to be able to make a statement on my preference because she could not come to terms with the fact that I had one so far removed from hers or rather did not have one to begin with.

It's a stupid excuse, I think, to get away with being aphobic, and it's very important that such statements get called out.

Just saw a post saying “minors shouldn’t identify as aro/ace” and I wanted to say… fuck you.

No look, okay I get why some people don’t want minors in certain spaces, and that’s fine. DNI minors then, if you want to.

But you can identify as anything at anytime in your life. It doesn’t hurt anyone to identify as one thing and then realise you’re another. It’s growth. Your identity will change as you age. It’s normal. And if it doesn’t? That’s also normal.

Also, from 13-18 (minors in most countries) is the most complexly romantic and sexual time. Obviously I’m not going into detail as again MINORS. But teenagers undergo the most change is hormones, emotional growth, romantic and sexual interest then any other age.

In my opinion, teenage years is when you’re MOST LIKELY to figure out you’re aro/ace. It’s the MOST LIKELY time to question your identity in general. Obviously, again, no age limit, but it’s the most common time for self discovery.

It’s called a “coming of age” story for a reason.

[thisconsumingrot]

A good rule of thumb for AI is "would you trust a trained pigeon to do this?"

"We trained a pigeon to recognise cancerous cell clusters and somehow they're really good at it" okay great, that's something that could plausibly be a thing.

"We trained a pigeon to recognise good CV:s and left it in charge of sorting through all our job applications" uh perhaps consider not doing that.

[thisconsumingrot]

Vivipary in Tomatoes

[thisconsumingrot]

"To vomit the anguish up." Like how art feels like an illness. That's certainly how it feels to me.

art as a confession James Baldwin (The Precarious Vogue of Ingmar Bergman), Albert Camus (Notebooks, 1935-1942)

[thisconsumingrot]

Me: Bad at being loved, worse at loving.

“I know I’m not easy to love. I’m a chronic over-thinker. I overreact more than I should…And every once in a while, I might be a little insecure. But if I am in love with you, I can promise you wholeheartedly that you will be loved with so much passion and intensity that you’ll forget what life felt like before I came along. You will always be cared for and you will always have someone in your corner. Maybe I’m not the best at being loved - But I like to think I’m pretty good at loving.”

— Chelsea Carroll

[thisconsumingrot]

I don’t crush on fictional characters I crush on the characters together. Dating that one character myself? Ew no. Putting those two characters together like barbie dolls and making them kiss? Yes please

[thisconsumingrot]

CAN MORE PEOPLE PLEASE KNOW WHAT THIS IS

[thisconsumingrot]

[thisconsumingrot]

This is a strange first post, but in honour of being bugged out after hearing SEVERAL people say "If you're aroace, how do you have so many exes?" here you go.

I grew up in a deeply religious and close-minded family. I was sat down and given little bedtime stories and it all ended in "love prevailed" "you need love to be happy" "love leads to kids and that's what you're in this world for" the whole shebang. So imagine a young child growing up consuming nothing but the same ideology over and over again - wouldn't you try to conform too?

Yes, I dated people. Several. Each time, I got bored and ended it. I didn't know why, kept trying. By the fifth breakup, I thought I was going mad. Why didn't anything feel right? Why did I get grossed out when they kissed me? Every week, I had a new crush. It was chosen based off who was nice to me that day. And each time I'm feeling more and more desperate because my family was pressuring me about love and boyfriends and I just wanted to be as happy as I thought they were.

Then my sheltered little ass heard about lesbians. I thought: "maybe I don't like guys because I like girls" WRONG. and for years I just dropped it. Stayed single, discovered there was more to the community than gay, straight, and bi. The term "aromantic" really resonated with me, but over time, I noticed that each time being aromantic was referenced, it was followed by "You never had crushes, never dated anyone".

In conclusion, shut up. People get confused, they make mistakes, and are influenced by their environment. And if my exes make me a "bop" or any cutesy little synonym for it, fine.

[thisconsumingrot]

as a kid I used to daydream about moving in together with a best friend and promising to never leave each other, growing old together, and holding each other’s hand through life. I didn’t understand why that level of commitment seemed to be reserved for romantic relationships, and I would get really upset thinking about how no friend would ever want to commit to me like that and they would eventually leave me for a romantic partner. anyway I just found out about this thing called queer platonic relationships—

[thisconsumingrot]

Messaging people for the first time is so hard. What am I supposed to say? Like, "You seem really odd and your blog intrigues me. Do you want to have philosophical conversations or perhaps talk about fictional characters?" What! Whatever. I will just follow you back and stare at your blog with my big beautiful brown eyes.

[thisconsumingrot]

there is no one moment in my mind where i realized i was asexual. there was no midnight revelation, or tear-stained coming to terms with my identity. i don’t even know how to explain it — i guess when i was like 12-13ish i realized that most people my age had crushes, or had experienced a crush in the past. i hadn’t. so i figured eh, i guess i just don’t get crushes. when i first read about the label ‘asexual’ there was no intense feeling of this is who i am, just the thought of oh, there’s a name for it. cool. i never even realized until recently that people actually want to have sex with the people they have crushes on?? like, seems fake but ok? and the fact that people are sexually active in high school, well, i thought that was only in movies. i don’t really know what the point of this post was. idk man. my sexuality was never really a source of internal strain.