she/her. i have thoughts, often they end up here. (this thing used to be longer, but life's short, and so should be descriptions)
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Luca Guadagnino understands the universal human need to watch two hot people make out.
#two or three#luca guadagnino#queer 2024#challengers#call me by your name#bones and all#there we have the cannibalism as well#what a king#in suspiria he gave us some bones cracking#a chiropratic role play basically
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why is having a crush like this?
#chaotic thoughts#university#crush#delulu#like deluluing so hard right now#he's tall#like what can i say? he's tall#vdkabdkdb#also great taste in music like why?????#life is a nightmare
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Dissociating my way through my last semester of uni.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#university#last year of uni#literally can count the people i can stand on one hand#im to exhausted to cope with anyone bullshit anymore#nor with my bullshit for that matter#just give me that degree for the love of any god please#all the classes are boring as fuck#i used to be a good student what the hell happened#i guess i still am but you know just the tired version of that#im tired
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I just need to make out with someone. A sloppy little make out session. Just to feel something, I guess.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#im stressed and horny and luca guadagnino keeps showing me tongues in his movies#i'm not even actively crushing on someone i just wanna make out#i wanna have fun#also university just do odd things to me and i have to cope through delusional thoughts#kissing is fun#luca guadagnino#challengers#queer 2024
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I want to merge with the snow-soaked soil.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#winter#mountains#in the mountains in a little almost deserted village i feel at ease at once#i also feel the need to frolick and songs hymns to dionysius#a lil the secret history vibe yes#new years resolution#lets called it that way
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Just watched Return to Oz and princess Mombi is now on my manifestation board.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#return to oz#princess mombi#what a queen what an inspiration#thirty heads to choose from according to the situation IM IN LOVE#and that cape that cape is perfection#shes evil? who cares not me#manifesting her lifestyle as we speak#also what a creepyly wonderful movie#im sad i didnt see it as a child i would have turned out even worse
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Sad, mad and horny as a new state of mind.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#university#crush#relationship#or lack there of#actually it was a situationship#if i werent such a horny girl id be looking into becoming a nun#what a tragedy my love life is#also i feel very represented by sabrina carpenter#shes just like me - even christmas makes her horny#a nonsense christmas#sabrina carpenter#situationships
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or maybe not, folks-
Giggling, seizing the day may actually be fun.
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Seems so hard not to be free
When you walk right beside me
Fontaines DC
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#quotes#fontaines dc#grian chatten#carlos o'connell#conor curley#conor deegan#tom coll#in the modern world#don't mind me crying
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Giggling, seizing the day may actually be fun.
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When it's 4 AM
And your heart is breaking
I will hold your hands
To stop them from shaking
If it takes all night
I will be on your side
The Last Dinner Party
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#quotes#song lyrics#on your side#the last dinner party#im obsessed with them and with this song#if i had the energy to cry i would#abigail morris#georgia davies#emily roberts#aurora nishevci#lizzie mayland#love them all in this awakening-filled october of mine
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I just keep trying, because stopping means having the guts of doing something different.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#melanchonic#university#autumn#i dont really know what's going on#but something is going on
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So fucking done, that I can feel the tears coming, but I can't even cry.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#i've started uni again and i finished reading the secret history again and there are way too many problems for me to deal with#i just need a good cry#crying#university#the secret history
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I need an obsession, something that would finally give me a reason to be here – to be alive.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#i just watched whiplash and i felt that#i'm also reading the secret history once again so maybe things add up#i'm nothing in my soul if not obsessive#obsession#overachiever#the secret history#whiplash
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It's raining, I have a cold, I can't really feel my hands except when I rub them together, The Secret History is heavy in my tote bag – I'm ready to read it again and pretend I'm not a Richard Papen myself.
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#the secret history#richard papen#i am unfortunately him#henry winter#camilla macaulay#charles macaulay#francis abernathy#bunny corcoran#it's autumn and i'm reading my bible again#who am i not to create a personality out of a book
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These brief eternal moments – the beer in my hand, the wind coming through the cracks, the laughs of friends I haven't seen in a while, their hands in mine, the sky darker than a few days ago and the chill breeze whispering, "it's autumn".
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#autumn#friends#i love my friends#and i love drinking beer with them in the chill autumn night#autumn nights
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I don't taste the shame
Sophie Thatcher
#chaotic thoughts#chaotic academia#dark academia#quotes#black and blue#sophie thatcher#this song gives me chills and gets me in my feelings-#also i do not taste the shame myself anymore so yes queen#my taste it if actually get a mullet because of her#song#song quotes
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