tinyfair - Tumblr blog

[tinyfair]

fuck this quarantine made me gained a few pounds shit i need thinspo so bad i let myself go for 2 weeks

[tinyfair]

[tinyfair]

[tinyfair]

[tinyfair]

[tinyfair]

Instagram: @nine.co

[tinyfair]

More!

[tinyfair]

a girl in my class started to sit beside me and introduced herself, being all nice and friendly. shes pretty and so skinny, and she complimented my skin and how tiny my wrists are even though hers is also tiny. she asked me about my bodycare and how she likes my perfume, it was the first time someone approached me and complimented my appearance. we clicked so fast, and i actually like talking to her. she said to me that she never saw me before (i know we probably bumped into each other back when i was 20 pounds heavier, but she never said hi). she asked me if i have a boyfriend yet and i said nope, and she seems so shocked, "a girl like you didnt have a boyfriend yet?? these guys are missing out so much" i dont know how i feel at that moment, i just shrugged it off but deep inside me i feel like shes just being nice.

being told fat and ugly all my life made me skeptical about compliments. i feel uncomfortable when someone tries to approach me or get to know me. i thought this going to be the best feeling, the best part of losing weight--that i gained attention--but i hate it. I hate it because now i know why those people didnt approached me back then, now i know why i dont have many friends. its not because i was shy, its not because i have boring personality, or because i seems to appeared "cold", its because i dont look attractive enough to them. its because they dont want to be affiliated with someone less attractive than them. now they see me as "their level" so they approached me, but i hate it. i hate it so much, it makes me lose trust in people.

i guess its really true what they said, you're not losing weight to be healthy, you lose weight to be accepted by the society. thats the reality.

[tinyfair]

[tinyfair]

@bbymari._ on insta🌸🌷

[tinyfair]

when your crush complains about being single and you're out there like

[tinyfair]

Talk to me. Tell me about how much fun you had yesterday, the joke that made you laugh until you cried, the dumb thing you're too embarrassed to tell anyone else.. Talk for hours about the things you love because there is nothing I'd rather be doing than listening.

[tinyfair]

I’m definitely pulling of a Killua from Hunter X Hunter

[tinyfair]

New anas be like:

“Is this disordered eating or dieting?”

[tinyfair]

my skinny best friend saying she’s getting fatter and stuffing her mouth while looking down on me with jealous/angry eyes because i have the self control to not eat:

anyway last week i was out with her family to eat on a saturday (which is my cheat day) so i told her i could eat as much ive cream as i wanted, and she should enjoy it too without guilt. she then said “listen i know you don’t eat the rest of the week lmao but i can’t eat that ben&jerry’s, im already gaining.” i just laughed it off and rolled my eyes, saying i do eat, dumbass. but still. i don’t get why she’s so jealous of me?

i used to be the fat friend, and now i’m lighter than she is. and i don’t think she can handle it because she used to be better looking, but now the attention is focused on me most of the time. she used to be quiet, but the only way people look at her now is by yelling and being obnoxious.

sorry for the rant lmao i love her but wtf

[tinyfair]

the fucked up thing about society is that when you get skinnier and prettier all of a sudden people start to be nicer. and it takes just a little effort to make them like you, smiling and eye contact, asking simple question, and baam they will like you. but when you're fat and not pretty, you have to give extra effort to make people like you, by cracking jokes all the time for example, being bubbly, having a good sense of humor. because smiling and eye contact doesnt do much. you have to look happy, have a great personality, selfless, kind to be liked by people. but the sad thing is, even when you have all the traits, when you look for a romantic relationship, people will back off saying things like "shes nice and have a great personality but i only see her as a friend" because no matter how great your personality is, your appearance still matter. and that is why i feel like ive been slapped with reality, that if i didnt take care of myself (physically) i will have to do so many things just to survive the social jungle. and in my case, im an introvert, boring person. i cant crack jokes, i dont like embarrassing myself just to make someone laugh. so the least thing that i have to do is to take care of my appearance. because when someone hot is shy and reserved people called it "mysterious and cold" not "weird and creepy". See? it was never about candy and fairytale and dainty figures, in my case weightloss is about surviving at life.

[tinyfair]

girl you did make their jaw drop. *shed tears and high five*

11/6/9

this is a long due update, im still on my journey of losing weight and right now its getting easier each day. my start point is years ago, but i always finding myself failing and got back into my previous eating pattern. but not this time, i started on 17th october, right before my 21st birthday and ever since i've already lost 9 pounds. i feel good being in control of my own body.

i want to lose 26 pounds in total by the end of the year, i cant wait seeing their jaw dropping.