tiredbutnotalone

[tiredbutnotalone]

[tiredbutnotalone]

I want to work in a place that makes stationaries, scented candles, home stuffs, art stuffs, notebooks, papers, furniture stuffs, literally everything that makes me happy.

I want to work in a place that have a very positive and good environment. Like great design (interior and architecturally wise), good people, embodies golden values and manners.

I want to work in a place that cares for there employees, cares for the society, that works for a positive good cause.

I deserve that

[tiredbutnotalone]

hello old self, i see now

ur alriggt

thank u for going thru this

we hav the knowledge

u r free now

april 4, 2018 still here, still fighting who is this person ? i am here but i feel disconnected dont get me wrong im so grateful but why am i fighting so hard ? for myself ? For other people ? maybe there is something i cant see i cant comprehend maybe im in the process of becoming to who ? I hope shes in a good place, internally and externally i believe in u Fight thru this See thru this Act as if u hav every willpower and energy in the world Hello other realms with me I feel theres somethings blocking me, Internally I cant get out i blur out of life im afraid one must continue

just who is the person i see in the mirror ? i know tht yes that physically thats me but i dont recognize her who is she who am i

[tiredbutnotalone]

Old self-portraits / old art

One thing to represent a time of moments

You just see it

You remember the feelings, The emotions u went thru The situations u fought thru

And this is a part of that This photo, this art

// trying to comprehend more things

[tiredbutnotalone]

Why you’re so sad

Maybe it’s because you want to live.

You want to live so hard It makes u sad It hurts you inside

You have all this things you want to do You wish to do (positive good things) That u just ache for them Yearn for them to be a reality

Thats it

Thats why

[tiredbutnotalone]

I am merely a vessel in which the energies are passing thru

It will not stop with me

For things have been set in motion since from chaos and nothingness the universe was created

[tiredbutnotalone]

“The only person who can pull me down is myself, and I’m not going to let myself pull me down anymore.”

C. JoyBell C (via amortizing)

[tiredbutnotalone]

Truly have no desire to change anyone’s pre-made judgement of me. I’ll let you think what you want of me and I won’t go out my way to clarify what you think is my truth. I know my truth and know my intentions have always been true, kind and thoughtful. Some will accept this love and some will be threatened by the love I try my best to put out into this world.

[tiredbutnotalone]

Please remember that your depression, anxiety and/or disorder is a part of you, not all of you. Your negative thoughts and the things that make you feel your worst self everyday are not who you truly are. The feeling you have will not go away overnight but you can outsmart your feelings. Find healthy ways to cope and use your dark thoughts as motivation. Practice pushing through little by little and become comfortable with your progress. There is no rush. Speak kinder to yourself and think nicer thoughts.

[tiredbutnotalone]

[tiredbutnotalone]

~ short film / animation ~ afterlife by ishu patel (1978)

+ surreal trippy visuals + silent film

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgCB8oMcbgE&list=PLWlSnVbYcNHtXUIPR_Ag2RJ44T55GRNGx&index=6&t=4s

[tiredbutnotalone]

~ short film / animation ~ father and daughter by michaël dudok de wit (2000)

+ animation/visuals a plus + life, after-life + heart warming

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTIkvwwC23A&list=PLWlSnVbYcNHtXUIPR_Ag2RJ44T55GRNGx&index=84&t=0s

[tiredbutnotalone]

~ short film / animation ~ the village by mark baker (1993)

+ v good v relevant + notice ur surroundings + r u in the village ?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzUjCPt6Kck&list=PLWlSnVbYcNHtXUIPR_Ag2RJ44T55GRNGx&index=83&t=0s

[tiredbutnotalone]

~ short film / animation ~ the man who planted trees by frederick back (1987) an adaptation of a jean giono short story

+ "it seemed to me that men could be as effective as God in tasks other than destruction" + "i never saw him lose heart nor was he ever deterred, and often god knows, it must have seemed that heaven itself was againtst him, i never try to imagine his frustrations, but to achieve such an end he must have had to overcome many obstacles, for such passion to succeed, he must surely fought and conquered despair" + quiet regular work + what u see around u did not just pop out of nowhere, it is thru hard work, growing/doing is hard, but do it anyways + r u Elzéard Bouffier ? r u the narrator ? who r u ?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTvYh8ar3tc&list=PLWlSnVbYcNHtXUIPR_Ag2RJ44T55GRNGx&index=82&t=0s

[tiredbutnotalone]

~ short film / animation ~ the black dog by alison de vere (1987)

+ surreal trippy + think concept of time, sense of belonging - illusions, who truly cares for u, trust

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CanZ96Mr1O8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueh1yN2wIMQ

[tiredbutnotalone]

"but our spirits can’t be seen as a star without darkness."

https://medium.com/@oliviajade/why-we-need-to-embrace-transition-for-a-fulfilled-life-7b6c187a6a0b

[tiredbutnotalone]

S: 07-23-18

E: 07-24-18

if you want to +grow, prepare to be alone. it's quite tiring, but do the work anyways

//

@ glmnl office, 04:54pm

just watched a lot of old animation shorts  - the black dog by Alison De Vere / the man who planted trees by Frédéric Back / the village by Mark Baker / father and daughter by Michael Dudok de Wit. listened to 'on the shortness of life" by seneca while drawing this. my stomach hurts so bad ; < eating fish congee and banana. good reflections today  - quiet regular work.

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