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The Tale of Gio Camole

The year was 1976.  A man named Dennis Wilson and his lovely wife Linda were living in Vietnam after the end of the war.  Just after finding out that Linda was pregnant they decided to move back to the States and start a new life back in Dennis' hometown of Derby, Kansas.  Prepping for the move they get rid of a ton of their belongings but decide to keep a clock that Dennis had acquired during his time in the military.  Probably in a shop very similar to where Gizmo was purchased in the hit film, Gremlins.

You may ask why I bring specific attention to this clock.  It wasn't very remarkable, had a standard wind up mechanism using a pair of keys, made out of polished hardwood, and designed to chime every 15 minutes.  What is interesting is that the clock itself would not keep time...unless it was on an interior, eastern facing wall.  Any other wall and it wouldn't chime, the time would stop going, it would seemingly jump at will throughout the day to new times, etc..  It was odd.  Moved it around the house though, find the right set of walls, and you're good to go.  Chiming every 15 minutes, just like clockwork.  That phrase makes sense now, I totally get it.

ANYWAY.  Dennis, Linda, their unborn baby, and the weird-ass clock make their way to Kansas and things continue on normally for four years.  Little Matt is raised to be quite the normal boy.  One day that normal boy was playing with a ball and getting just a little too rambunctious, that rapscallion.  He tossed his ball at the couch and it bounced off crashing into the clock, knocking it to the floor.  The clock broke beyond actual repair, and little Matt got a bit of a talking too.  Things went back to their normal life, just no more beautiful chimes from the antique clock.

Shortly thereafter Dennis and Linda started to notice some strange occurrences happening throughout the house.  Pictures knocked over, doors open or closed when they hadn't been before, and odd noises at night when everyone should have been in bed.  Something else started happening too.  Young Matt had made himself a new friend.  He mentioned that he had been waking up at night, and someone was asking him to play.  That was his new friend Gio.  They'd play together, talk, and have a good old time.  Matt would blame Gio for noises, or say she was just being silly.  Coming up for excuses to the odd goings-on.

About this time Dennis and Linda found out that they were going to have another child, and they got too distracted with the pregnancy to worry too much about Matt and his imaginary friend, or any little pranks that he may be playing around the house.  After nine months Amanda was born, and Matt had seemingly forgotten about Gio.  Not being brought up at all anymore.  The strange things around the house also seemed to subside.  Things went back to normal.

Four years later, out of the blue strange things started happening around the house again.  The same little mischief that had been happening when Matt was about that age.  At dinner one night they heard a loud THUMP THUMP from the other room.  Amanda laughed.  "Oh, that's just Gio!  She's so silly."  Upon hearing the name Gio, Dennis and Linda looked at each other in surprise.  They hadn't ever mentioned Gio to her, they had honestly forgotten about her.  Matt didn't even remember himself, having gotten too interested in Star Wars  to care about imaginary friends.  Things are starting to get weird again around the Wilson household.

in the same home town Dennis had a brother named Bill.  Bill was married to Kathy, and they just found out they were having a baby girl.  After the pregnancy and baby Sarah was brought about, little Amanda had moved on from Gio as well.  Or had Gio moved on from her?  I wonder if you can see where things may be going from here...

Back to the clock.  At some point after Sarah was born Dennis and Bill consolidated alot of their belongings into a storage unit near Bill's home.  Just trying to make space for all the new family members, and whatnot.  You know how it goes.  During the process of loading everything into the storage unit, Bill stumbled upon a broken old clock.  "Hey, what's this piece of shit?" said Bill.  "Oh, that's just a dumb old clock.  Never worked right, had to be facing some way or another." replied Dennis.  Bill having fancied himself as a bit of a woodworker asked to take the clock on as a bit of a project to see if he could restore the case.  "It'll probably never keep time, but we can make it look good."

And make it look good he did.  At that point the clock got a new home prominently on an eastern facing wall within the home.  Facing right out a big bay window into the morning sun.

Four years go by...Sarah is now talking to Gio Camole, the legend has been passed on to Bill and Kathy.  They just think it's all silly, the cousins clearly must have been talking about it to influence their younger cousin, right?  That's what kids do.  Then, as it goes, Bill and Kathy learn they are having a little baby boy, and they decide to name him Benjamin (hey that's me!).  The pattern repeats.  Sarah stops talking to Gio, time goes by and Benjamin hits 4, and Gio comes back.  Always followed by mischief, noises, and an obvious appreciation for children.

Here's where everything changes.  I am a man of science with very few spiritual or supernatural beliefs or superstitions.  How can I argue with a presence that was in my life from age 4 to when I left home at 18?

I saw Gio.  She's as real as you or me.  So maybe it's time I give you a description of Gio.  Gio is a young woman, probably in her 20s.  I have never been able to determine ethnicity, but she is not Vietnamese as far as I can tell.  About 5'4 in height, dark brown hair, always dressed in a nightgown.  She loves to smile, and very rarely looks angry or upset.  Now, ultimately I do not remember  anything we talked about or anything like that during the "imaginary friend" phase of our relationship.  After I got to about 6 or 7 I never spoke about her to anyone, and maybe she got mad about that?  But never really showed it, we just didn't talk anymore.

FLASH FORWARD 12 YEARS.  So now Benjamin is an adult, he's got a wife, a four year old daughter Abigail, and a new baby on the way.  They move into Benjamin's childhood home after Bill moved out.  What a perfect place to raise his family: the house he grew up in.  Almost immediately though, Abigail started to be a little weird.  She would be found talking to herself, having strong disagreements with herself even.  "I can't do that!  That's naughty, they would be mad." or things like, "You're so silly.  You look just like mommy."  You could snoop on her around corners and she would just carry on.  The  moment you'd come around though she'd stop, stop what she was doing, and immediately pretend to be doing something else.  When confronted about who she was talking to, she would just say her ponies were fighting, or something along those lines.

Four more years go by, the now four year old Arya starts talking to her as well.  Abigail never stopped this time, but now they both did it.

Sadly this is where my story gets sad.  A little while later I found out that my wife had found someone else, we were on the path for divorce, and my kids were being taken from me and my home.  I was at the lowest point of my life...and I am pretty sure Gio was as well.  I would wake up in the middle of the night to literal screaming in my head and I knew it was her.  I'd drive up to an empty house and she'd be standing on the porch yelling silently.  Living within this home all by myself with an angry presence to keep me company, what a lovely time of my life.

Luckily, things eventually got better.  The girls were coming to spend time with me, things were getting back to normal.  Gio doesn't talk to them anymore, but she's not angry either.  I saw her the other day and she was the happiest I've seen her in a long time.  It's nice to know we're back on good terms.  This story doesn't really have an ending, as it's still on going, but here we are.  Thanks for reading.

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The GOAT...y

I know normal people are excited for Borderlands 3, but I’m just sitting here itching for that Borderlands GOTY release.  Gonna hit up Pandora with my buddy Beast for the first time in almost a decade. Sounds like Gearbox has been paying attention to the AAA shitshow around them in the industry and thought they might try and play it cool with some freebies for longtime fans.

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Praise the Iwata.

In the wake of EA laying off more and more employees, let's take a moment to praise the memory of Iwata. Satoru Iwata, ex president of Nintendo.  What did he do when the Wii U flopped?  HALVED HIS SALARY instead of firing any employees.  What did he do when the Nintendo 3DS flopped at launch?  HALVED HIS SALARY instead of firing employees.

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InB4

“Will Borderlands 3 finally take down Destiny 2 as the best looter shooter available?” No.  It won’t.

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Bethesda has made a public declaration of peace!

So Bethesda declared for Valve in the great Launcher Wars of 2019.  The writing has always been on the wall:  Bethesda has the majority of it’s products on Steam, a launcher for a single company with a smaller library is inane, and we all saw the public backlash against Fallout 76.  They don’t want any more issues with their image, and sticking with their launcher or getting a paycheck from Epic would simply be the final nail in the coffin. I’ve made my opinion known elsewhere, but I suppose I should here as well.  Exclusives are terrible for the PC gaming industry.  Epic Games Store is using their bankroll to acquire title exclusivity.  They are also offering a better cut of profits to title owner.  So not only are the game makers getting a better overall cut of profits they are also getting an initial guaranteed paycheck and not having to wait to actual sell the product to consumers.  Great for game makers and yet terrible for consumers all at the same time.

By strong-arming the industry you are not creating a freedom of choice amongst consumers by providing us with options of platform.  You are bullying us into using your featureless shell of a games launcher.  EGS doesn’t even have a search function or a shopping cart.

So good on Bethesda.  I was already planning on not purchasing any more of their products due to current business practices (one of which was including forcing a launcher upon us), so maybe there is hope in the future with this declaration of peace. *edited for terrible grammar.  I’m a terrible editor.

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This is not my beautiful house.  This is not my beautiful wife.

Seeing as how I seem to have a seemingly prophetic ability when it comes to the video game industry, I figured I’d start blogging.  Even if it’s only to myself.  So here we are.