turbulentoceann

[turbulentoceann]

I just need to acknowledge, embrace, and overcome my fear. I want to be honest about what I am afraid of and just face them without avoiding it. I'm not sure when I can successfully do all of these, but there's hope, isn't there? I'm not clinging to this hope, it's just, I work hard hoping that it can have a good outcome, which is to overcome my fear so that my emotions don't overflow, or else I work so hard for what? Hoping for a nothing?

[turbulentoceann]

I understand that you felt stressed when I got emotional, but wouldn't you be too selfish if you only considered your own feelings? You are saying that I'm selfish, but I think you are the selfish one. I'm working really really hard to fix my emotional issues, I'm seeing a therapist constantly, and not to mention I am also trying my best to express myself without hurting others. Why couldn't we just tolerate each other and make it work?

[turbulentoceann]

Why do I need to tell you everything about me? Wouldn't that be too much? Do you consider my feelings when you would like me to answer your questions? These are personal.

[turbulentoceann]

Writing my feelings down means the pain and suffering will surpass? I'm not believing this. I just try writing them down to get off my chest that's all.

[turbulentoceann]

I always believe that being indecisive is just my nature, a part of me. My manager told me that being indecisive and giving ambiguous reply can leave an impression to people as being uncertain and lack of commitment, which I never intended to do so. Somehow I feel like I'm a person who is very difficult for people to understand, because I'm always the special one and I never provide a too positive or negative answer. They just want a straight "yes" or a firm "no" but I just want to be in a middle. Seems like I'm the strange people in my company because I couldn't decide what I want and I am okay with a lot of things...