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[tw-episodereactions]

Teen Wolf 1x12

Ah, yes, Chris honking at Scott instead of aiming a weapon at him is totally in character. We shall honk to warn this creature off, despite the fact that we’ve been stalking him for eleven episodes.

Lol, Peter just walks off like Stiles will do exactly as he’s told. Please don’t have Stiles do exactly as he’s told. Have him text Jackson and Danny to track down Scott’s cell and then tell Scott about it.

See? The woods are like two steps away from the school and it would have been a lot harder for the police and Argent’s to track Derek in the woods than on the streets in that one episode.

Allison’s reaction after Scott runs is approximately forty seconds long, some slow motion, mostly in close up with one long shot.

Scott’s reaction is approximately forty seconds long, some slow motion, mostly in long shot with one close up that almost immediately dollies back to a long shot.

And the one close up is on the scream instead of the sobbing.

Why do they keep making these choices to de-emphasize Scott’s pain/anguish/trauma? Like, it’s weird, right? It’s not just me?

Like, from the beginning they’ve been telling this story about how being treated like a monster doesn’t make you one. Pretty much every character, with the exceptions of Allison, Melissa, and Deaton have treated Scott like a monster, a pawn, a tool, a thing to be used. Some to more extent than others, but even Stiles has treated Scott like that on several occasions.

And the story seems to be trying to show us at every turn how Scott refuses to be used. Refuses at every turn to cast aside his humanity and descend into a mindless, angry thing that the Hales want him to be and the Argents expect him to be. The storyline, the dialogue, the acting all support this. But half the time the shots don’t, and it’s driving me nuts, honestly.

Does Jackson actually care about Lydia now too? My headcanon where he got empathic bleed from Scott is holding up, I see.

Oh. Menstruation jokes about a teenage girl from a grown man is definitely not gross and creepy and demeaning. I guess that’s one characterization they haven’t screwed up yet.

Okay, so, 1) it’s interesting that Chris recognized what Kate was doing but didn’t stop it, 2) it’s interesting that Kate was the one to volunteer to come instead of Chris bringing her in like I thought, and 3) Chris, buddy. You fucking chose to try to run Scott over and have him turn in front of your daughter, Kate wasn’t even there. Take ownership of your own fucking actions, my dude.

Lol, Kate, you’re usually a better liar than that. ALSO, I still haven’t heard how the school janitor was connected so until we do he’s an innocent victim.

And now we also know that Kate’s actions with the fire either weren’t sanctioned by Chris - most likely - or weren’t sanctioned within the hunting community at all. I’m still trying to figure out the hierarchy of the hunters, and how big the family/network is.

Now that Allison is in the know maybe we’ll learn more, but even with two born werewolves we’ve learned shit about that culture so I’m not holding my breath.

It makes no sense that he’s sending Kate with Allison unless he just wants Kate out of the way. Mrs. Argent would seem like a better choice in several respects, not the least of which she hasn’t been going behind Chris’ back with Allison already. Also, bro, Kate ain’t exactly the comforting type and your kid needs comfort right now.

Okay, so her mother clearly isn’t the comforting type either. Are we saying that Allison get her compassion from Chris? Oh boy.

They keep mentioning the ‘moral code’ they have, but not giving us details. I mean, it’s apparent that Kate doesn’t follow it, and clearly others are willing to bend it. But even the “good” ones like Chris still try to rile up werewolves into going past a specific line in the sand.

Hunters are just a bunch of cops, huh? No accountability, protect their own over anyone else, instigate werewolves to violence so that they can feel justified in killing them.

So I guess he did steal Jennifer’s car. Still doesn’t make sense how he and Derek got to the school before Stiles when they presumably left at least ten minutes after him, but whatever. Also, did Derek kill the nurse when he hit her in the face? There was definitely a lot of blood. And this now makes (at least) two people not associated with the fire that got murdered.

Scott going to the vet is a good fucking call and he should have done it sooner. He should, perhaps, actually call Deaton though because he’s like the only one who’s been both compassionate enough and capable enough to help you.

So, like, Allison doesn’t know who to believe, and I get that. Her family says they love her, but they’ve been lying to her. Scott says he loves her but he’s been lying to her. It’s hard to figure out who to trust.

Out of curiosity, though. How is Scott able to get past the Mountain Ash? Is it just because he’s got a key to the back, and never goes out the front? Did it only get added after Deaton was kidnapped by Derek or maybe it only works on Alphas? So many questions!

Hey, look, we actually got close up on Scott’s grief that actually lasted about the same amount of time as someone else’s! It can be done!

Well, I see the family resemblance between Derek and Peter now.

Oh. Hey. A cop being shitty? Weird. Like, fuck, dude, Jackson’s a goddamn asshole, but a) you don’t know anything about that, b) he’s a fucking minor, and c) you have no idea what the fuck happened or how traumatized he might have been. And, like, none of the other cops with him are pulling him back? Jesus Christ.

Aside from how it makes sense cause cops are just generally shitty, why the fuck would he act like that about two kids we’ve never really seen him interact with? Either he’s got something against Jackson or he’s weirdly protective over Lydia and both of those options creep me out a little.

No, no, don’t bother apologizing to the kid you manhandled for no reason.

“Only the responsible ones,” Peter says, ignoring the dead body literally underneath where Stiles is typing. And the janitor. Can’t forget that guy.

Stiles trying to protect Scott is nice, if futile.

Scott gets his terrible security protocols from his mother. But at least his was passively bad, while hers was actively bad. I still can’t believe she just let Jackson use her computer like that.

Also, his is not, you know, illegal criminally or civilly with criminal consequences that could include termination, up to $50,000 in fines, and a prison sentence.

I’m sorry, but did this fucking show give us a guy who not only knows about werewolves but feels totally secure standing up to one and subsequently getting the werewolf to stand down, which our main character witnessed, and then not have the main character, like, go to him for help? Just have him go there for refuge?

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND, GIVE ME DEATON.

Oh, hey. Scott howling again. I hope this time works better than last time. I can kind of understand why this was not his first choice of things to try given his previous experience.

But, uh, are you telling me Peter didn’t hear that and won’t also come running? Or that Peter didn’t think to try that instead of the whole phone thing? Or, like, now that apparently Derek is his beta, Peter can’t track him that way like he’s basically done to Scott during this whole show?

I feel like the phone thing was put in there specifically as a way to make Stiles useful. Especially since we haven’t seen this skill set from him before.

FYI, that longitude/latitude puts you in Antarctica.

Lol, so we specifically made a comment about how the service might not work in a parking garage and popped out the mifi, but we’re totally able to bypass that same issue to get the gps coordinates from a phone that’s underground. Sure, Jan.

Okay, so at least Peter did hear the howl. And you know what? I’ll accept that Scott outsmarted him because he’s done it several times already. The weird part is that you’d think Peter would be the one more in touch with the werewolf instinct and Scott would be the one more apt to use technology, but we’re getting the reverse.

If I had any faith in these folks, I’d have to wonder if that was on purpose. Like, has modern werewolf culture lost itself to the violence and lost all connection to its proto culture? Not all werewolf myths cast them as monstrous and bad, particularly Irish and Scottish folklore have them as helpful protectors. Scott McCall.

Ummm, why is Allison at the hospital? Did she hear Jackson’s voicemail and insist on coming? Did Kate just dump her somewhere and then she heard what happened to Lydia?

I actually really like the super quick flashes of the bloody room and Lydia writhing. That was very effective.

Okay, so Kate’s using this to manipulate Allison some more. Gotcha. Chris, you’re dumb for letting her be under Kate’s influence some more.

Stiles, why would you even ask that?

Oh. Okay. So we’re good with biting people of color and women and turning them without asking, but you’re gonna ask the white kid if he wants it. Why do I, once again, feel like that’s social commentary that they didn’t actually intend to make, but is so spot on it’s painful?

Also, is this the first episode where they’ve explained that the bite doesn’t always take, and that it’s not due to the intent of the one biting, but the biology (?) of the one being bitten?

That still doesn’t explain why Peter didn’t bite more people when Scott balked. Peter clearly doesn’t mind sacrificing people when convenient.

Peter is really much better at manipulation than Derek was. He and Kate are cut from the same cloth.

Part of me thinks that Stiles was lying because we’ve seen him be envious of Scott. The other part of me knows that Peter’s a lying liar who lies and no one should ever trust him.

The stark fucking difference between how the Sheriff treated Jackson versus how he’s treating Stiles.

I feel like that phone battery would have died by now. I have zero memory of how good phone batteries were 13 years ago though.

Wait, did this fucking bozo not hear Derek roaring? Dumbass.

Why does the lighting on the walls of this place always look like the light is reflecting off water but there’s no sound of water when they walk. I noticed it in the last episode too. Very distracting.

Why the fuck did Stiles bring up Derek? First of all, he knows his dad knows that because he got his dad drunk and his dad told him he knows that. Second, unless he’s planning on confessing everything and getting the police to roll up to Derek’s place, then saying that right now is incredibly dumb.

Holy shit! They did it to someone other than Scott this time! Made him look dumb so that someone else could have a snappy comeback! Why is this thing that these writers do? I mean, other than them being bad at their jobs.

I honestly can’t remember, does Stiles know that Allison got the necklace from her aunt? Also, like, he doesn’t even describe it, but Stiles somehow puts it together, lol.

“You really want to talk about this right now?” Says the guy who has, of course, been super forthcoming with Scott about werewolves this whole time. Who literally didn’t just switch sides to help Peter in a way that left Scott traumatized and writhing half naked on a locker room floor. This guy who has totally never made Scott’s life actively worse or hurt him almost every single time they met.

Yeah, Fuckface, he wants to talk about this now and with good reason.

Derek’s practically his own movie theater with how much he’s projecting on all these kids.

Btw, I am taking this as confirmation that Derek had, in fact, switched sides and was not actually playing along to still try to stop Peter. Which means that he’s a trash fire of a human being who has currently done only two good things. Possibly ever.

Weren’t there just police all over the hospital? I feel like someone should maybe notice a group of armed men terrorizing two high school kids after what happened to Lydia. 

Scott’s sad little, “Just say you’ll help and I’ll unlock your other…” is so funny because, like, even if Derek said it Scott was resigned to the fact that he wouldn’t be telling the truth, but would unlock him anyway.

Chris’ friend tried to kill him, huh? Was it because he was surrounded by people he knew wanted to kill him? Was it because he was hurt and in pain and just needed to learn how to control it? Like, I feel like there were other ways you could have handled that, Chris. If all you’ve got is a gun, every problem looks like a target, I guess.

I don’t buy that Kate and Allison got there before Peter. He’s there somewhere. 

Why didn’t they shoot the flashbulb one first? It’s unnecessarily cruel, which is Kate’s M.O. but it still feels weird that Allison would go along with it.

Thank you, I guess for at least saying that Allison wasn’t willing to go along with killing. But, like, she knows Derek was being tortured. What did she think was going to happen if they did just capture Scott?

Lol. Okay, sure. Kate and Allison and Chris all got there before Peter.

“I did what I was told to do.”

Huh. I’m going to be real with you, I assumed that Kate would bust out with her warped views on why they need to die and that’s it’s a good thing and they’re just animals. I wasn’t expecting someone pulling her strings. I mean, I guess she could be lying, but why?

It makes way more sense that Chris is a naive idiot, honestly, than to think there wasn’t corruption in the hunters, they’re cops.

Lol, Chris, you fucking shot that same kid three months ago with no proof he’d spilled human blood. Bud, leg to stand on? You ain’t really got one.

Although good to know at least part of their code.

Wait, are these bullets even wolfsbane? Will normal bullets even kill werewolves? Derek was basically fisted through his chest and survived, so I guess I assumed they were more lethal than regular bullets.

We hunt those who hunt us. Well that’s definitely not the truth. Not if they were there the when Laura Hale died because she was the first victim and clearly a werewolf. 

Peter did you have to succumb to the drama of the creaking door? Really? You couldn’t have just quietly launched yourself at Kate and dragged her off before anyone could get off a shot?

Also, where the fuck are Chris’ men who were at the hospital with them? Why did Chris not call for backup en route since apparently Stiles gave him the location. Sloppy work.

I understand that you’ve loved her your whole life Allison, but you just found out that she killed a bunch of innocent people including children and she almost killed the boy you said you loved right in front of you. I feel like running after her is the wrong choice.

Perhaps checking on your father or grabbing back the weapon you lost are better first choices.

You know what? I’m fine with that. Kate dying in that house by Peter’s hand works for me.

I am shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on here.

The shaky cam, the low light, and the fact that all three of them are wearing black leather jackets is not helping me figure out what’s happening in this fight.

Like, I don’t want to be reductionist and go for the simple metaphors, but for symmetry Scott should be in the red hoodie, Derek should only be wearing his light gray/dirty white shirt to show how he’s nominally fighting the good fight here even if he’s still not a good guy, and Peter should be in dark or colors indistinguishable from black.

Or they could have just used some more damn lighting, that’s an option too, I guess.

Well, I guess the cgi werewolf will theoretically make it a little easier to tell who’s who.

Hey, Stiles and Jackson. Good of you guys to show up. What kept you?

Wow, the practical effects for the Alpha are jarringly better than the cgi. Should’ve gone with as many practical effects as possible. Which is honestly so true for most things.

Oh. I guess they stopped by the chemistry room first. Lol.

Well. This is actually a very good strategy, Stiles. I can’t imagine anyone would react well to being lit on fire, but Peter’s going to react worse than most. Out of idle curiosity, why did you only make two?

I feel like, keep shooting is also an option here?

Look, Allison, girl. I get that you understandably believe Scott was telling the truth now, but, uh. If I were Scott I’d push you away until we could talk shit over because you totally let your aunt almost kill me in cold blood.

I get it’s a teen show, which means kissing instead of talking, but still. Not really appropriate after you watched your aunt get murdered and all y’all tried to burn a man to death.

“Because I love you,” is a bad answer.

How about because both you and my family lied to me and I didn’t know who to trust, so I trusted them because they’re my family and I’ve only known you for three months. But Kate showed that my trust in her was misplaced, and you showed that my trust in you wasn’t, and I’m sorry I almost got you killed.

Oh. Hey, Peter wasn’t all the way dead. We were all just letting him suffer and possibly heal up then? That’s a choice, I guess.

Now, big question time. Is Derek going to let Scott try to kill Peter to see if it will actually reverse the change or is he going to take his revenge for Peter killing Laura and screw Scott over forever?  Hmmm, based on almost all of Derek’s previous behavior, I’m stumped.

I wonder if the Argent’s knew about that possible cure. I wonder if a hunter getting turned and killing their Alpha is how they found out that it was a possibility in the first place. Or maybe a hunter started it as a rumor to try to get betas to kill their Alphas.

This just in, Derek Hale remains a garbage fire of a human being. This is my shocked face.

The Sheriff just out here touching evidence with his bare hands.

I love how in the episode where they specifically say that you either turn or die from the bite that immediately gets disproven. Hey, quick question: does anyone actually know anything about werewolves? Maybe that’s why we’re not getting any details. None of the writers fucking know anything either.

Ugh, Jackson’s back again. If Derek turns him, he’ll be the stupidest goddamn man alive. Which means he’s going to.

Any bets that Jackson being turned will somehow make him more scared than less?

Aaaand we’ve got more hunters coming. Is it like a tribunal because the Argent’s fucked up? Is it the person pulling Kate’s strings, who knows!

Okay, so, here’s the thing. The story structure is killing me here. Too much is happening after the climax. We didn’t need the Sheriff finding Kate, that should’ve been cut. It gave us no knew information and that storyline was wrapped up again with the newspaper article like 30 seconds later.

We didn’t actually need to find out about Lydia not being a werewolf and possibly being something else. There was already a cliffhanger about her, we didn’t need to resolve that cliffhanger only to immediately have a new one but with less tension.

This should have ended with just the Jackson & Derek scene to theoretically wrap up that storyline, and the Argent scene - which gave us new information - transitioning to Scott and Allison cuddling under the moon - which is the resolution.

Season One Thoughts

This is a story about not becoming a monster. Kate was monstrous because she was ‘just following orders.’ Peter and Derek and even Jackson to an extent were monstrous because they let their pain selfishly consume them and then took it out on everyone else. Chris is perhaps the least monstrous because while he clearly refused to see what was in front of him for years, when there was nothing else to see but the truth, he did step up. Scott is, of course, the monster who refused to be monstrous.

I think Scott is a refreshing character. He’s a lead of color in a teen show, which is incredibly rare. He’s a teenager who does dumb teenager things and makes mistakes, but tries so hard to do the right thing. He’s stubborn and kind, and those are shown as both strengths and weaknesses, which I like. He clearly takes after his mother a whole bunch, and they have a sweet relationship.

I thought Allison and Stiles were good, complex characters, but there were certainly some iffy fucking characterizations choices for Stiles at the beginning of the season and some iffy fucking mischaracterizations with Allison at the end.

And finally, with my whole chest, DEATON IS MY FAVORITE. I want to know literally everything about him and I hope so very much that he gets a chance to be the mentor that Scott deserves.

[tw-episodereactions]

Teen Wolf 1x11

I realize the electricity is more to show the audience what’s happening, but it just makes it look very unsafe. We need OSHA standards for this torture session.

“What are you doing to him? Is that going to kill him?” Allison asks in a vaguely concerned voice like someone isn’t being tortured in front of her. Like, I feel like her reaction would be a little more visceral.

Like, she literally told Jackson that she didn’t think what was after them in the school was Derek so as far as she knows he hasn’t actually done anything wrong. I mean, okay sure he’s definitely not fully human, but still.

“Don’t get all ethical on me now.” Umm, when has Allison not been shown as ethical? She’s snuck out and ditched class (fairly normal teenage behavior - and even those two things were shown as something that she doesn’t normally do) but that’s like the extent of any misdeeds.

I think Kate gets wrapped up in her own psychosis and forgets how regular people would act.

“How else do you think I stay sane?” Buddy, I think we missed that turnoff a few miles back.

Kate did not actually answer her question. Also, I am so confused at Allison’s reaction here. Is she is shock? I know that Allison’s had a thing about being scared, but Derek’s screams and Kate’s levity is so off putting you’d think her compassion would be overriding everything else. I mean, dog’s have big old canines too and she immediately tried to help it, even though she was scared. I don’t get it.

Like, that definitely makes sense that it’s the tactic Kate would use, but this whole scene still feels off to me.

Torturing someone who’s tied up and who, as far as you know, didn’t do anything wrong, as a way to feel powerful is, uh, spineless actually.

We had like two full minutes of Allison’s close up reaction to all of this, which is way more than we’ve ever gotten of Scott’s reaction, and yet all I’m getting from her is shock. Which, I admit is a valid reaction, but I’m going to need to see Allison get angry and mistrustful about her family, and I’m going to need her compassion to rear its head to make this believable.

My experience with crying in front of a cop amounts to him giving me a ticket and basically saying don’t drive angry and then leaving, which is a totally cool thing to say to someone crying so hard I was dry heaving. ACAB.

Nah, I reject this. I know that her wanting to feel powerful has been a theme since literally the first episode, but so has her kindness and compassion and willingness to stand up for people. If this was something immediate and in the moment, that’s one thing, but her watching someone be tortured and then feel cool about killing them is not in character in my opinion.

Have I mentioned that I like Deaton? He’s just so chill.

Like, got kidnapped and escaped, nbd. Carried his employee through the woods and performed surgery to save his life, all in a day’s work. He clearly knows something about Peter, even if he doesn’t know he’s an Alpha, and is just willing to play along without backing down.

Deaton steps forward like a badass. “Like I said, we’re closed.”

Bet you a million dollars his heart rate was fucking steady as a metronome.

Well someone can clearly ward things against werewolves. I wonder why the Argents don’t have that.

“Mountain Ash, that’s an old one.” Huh, I wonder if Deaton isn’t actually fully human himself, like an elf or Druid or something that lives a long time and uses natural warding.

FUCKING BADASS. DEATON, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE A KING?!

That effect was well done as well.

Scott, buddy, if you can hear him then he can hear you. Also, you should be sticking around Deaton and figuring out how he got titanium balls, because that dude is clearly the kind of mentor you need.

I mean, I can only guess that the reason he wasn’t helping Scott before is that he didn’t know Scott was involved in the werewolf shenaniganary until Derek kidnapped him.

Are you kidding me, why are we not questioning Deaton about what he knows and how he can help?! Why are we going back to Derek who is still terrible?! This makes no sense!

“They use Derek to get Peter, problem solved.” Lol, again, I’m sort of with Stiles on this.

Stiles is making some points, honestly. But, like, Stiles. I’m glad you’re sitting down because you don’t really have a leg to stand on when it comes to Derek’s history of violence against Scott. Much different scale, admittedly, but still.

“He wasn’t going to kill anyone. And I’m not letting him die.”

I’m not sure why Scott’s so convinced of that. He’s only helped Scott twice, and while this last time did cost him terribly, he’s still been the absolute worst to Scott at every other opportunity. This speaks more to Scott’s character than anything. 

Uhhh, why would Melissa possibly be calling Peter back? She was definitely creeped out by him, I don’t get it.

Oh, my heart. Give Melissa and Scott some hugs stat.

Just now realized that the McCall house is not blue. We’ve only ever seen the outside at night in the blue lighting.

Do we know why her car is missing a side mirror? Am I not remembering an accident? Whether I am or not, it’s actually a nice subtle reference to them not having much money. I’d prefer more of those instead of the clunky dialogue earlier in the scene since presumably Stiles would a) know of their money problems and b) remember that Derek already killed Scott’s first phone like a week ago so he can’t exactly replace another one so easily.

“Scott, you can’t protect everyone,” is a nice sentiment, Stiles, but you literally beat him up and got him beat up because he didn’t protect your pops. You also flat out told him, “You can do things that nobody else can do. So that means you don’t have a choice anymore. It means you have to do something.”

Like, what led to the turnaround here? Or is it that you only want him to put his life on the line to protect the people you want him to protect and everyone else can suck it?

So clearly he can get pictures taken without his eyes reacting to the flash. That seems like if it’s an official booking he’d be smarter to not let his eyes react because he’s been so keen on keeping the secret. I guess I’ve never thought he was smart though.

Ugh, Kate is so gross. Did Derek give her info about his his family during pillow talk and that’s why he’s so angry at himself? Still not an excuse for how he treats people, but I can sort of see why he’s been such a bitch about Scott and Allison’s relationship. 

Scott, bud, I need you to go back to Deaton and figure out the thing about Mountain Ash and use it to protect Allison’s house. Work smarter not harder.

Ummm, excuse you guy in the top right of the locker room shot who is jamming to his own beat, I love you.

Scott who’s wanted to play lacrosse since the first episode and who’s spent several episodes in pursuit of this goal even after he turned, just up and quits so that he can go to the dance to protect Allison. I still have to wonder though if it isn’t just about his feelings for her, but also about his ability to anchor himself with her.

Wasn’t Jackson planning on going with her anyway, why’s he being such a dick? Oh, right, it’s Jackson. That’s just his natural state of being.

Lol, trying to appeal to Jackson’s humanity is hilarious.

Stiles, buddy, you are not even close to being always right. But you do have a much better understanding of assholes because you are one half the time.

Wait, hold up. I honestly don’t get what they’re trying to go for with this scene. I mean, I know that in most other circumstances they’d be implying that Scott either very convincingly threatened physical harm or caused actual physical harm.

But, like, actually causing physical harm to someone with intent who’s not actively attacking him is wildly out of character for Scott, and Jackson knows that. There’s literally no threat that I can think of that Scott could convincingly make that Jackson would actually believe.

Jackson, even after he found out Scott was a mythical monster, even after Scott has physically hurt both him and his bff, has still openly taunted and threatened Scott without fear of reprisal. He has too much belief in his own superiority over Scott to be effected that much by just a threat, which means that Scott would have had to do way more than just shove him against a door, and I literally just can’t buy that with the way they developed Scott’s character. They either fucked up Jackson’s character, fucked up Scott’s character or fucked up both in that scene.

Ugh, and now Allison’s character too. What the fuck is going on in this episode?

Because after that four minute traumatic beginning to the episode and her tossing and turning in her sleep, we get smiley, bubbly Allison again? I call shenanigans. Like, they could have gone all in on the mood changes as she struggled to reconcile her whole childhood and her morals/ethics with her new change of heart, but we haven’t gotten any of that so it just seems like bad writing/acting/directing.

Is Lydia buying Allison a dress because she kissed Scott? Because, actually that does seem like a pretty big apology. Now that she’s not attached to Jackson did Lydia Martin find a conscience?

I don’t get it. Why would Allison want Lydia to go with Stiles?

Funny how usually when someone is telling someone else to smile, it’s usually a man telling a woman, but in this episode it’s been Kate telling Derek and now Allison and Lydia saying it to each other.

Bet you ten bucks that Lydia already had her dressed picked out, and is now doing retail therapy because of Stiles.

Peter, dude, you are so creepy. I was going to say that we know he’s got game because he was able to ask Melissa out successfully, but also after he was incredibly creepy she still called him for a second date, so maybe he’s just like this all the time.

I do not fucking get Allison’s characterization in the episode! Vaguely concerned leads to fearful and crying leads to her confidently shooting arrows at Derek’s wanted poster leads to trouble sleeping, then bubbly with Jackson, cautious with Lydia, and now she’s like full on panicking baby deer.

I wish we could have had a conversation between her and her dad where she brings up the book that she initially got from Kate and watched her evaluating gaze as he lied to her again. I wish we could have seen her conversation with Jackson be more subdued as she tries to get out of the dance because of all the stuff going on and he cajoles her into going still, and as they’re walking away she tells him that she found some things out that she wants to tell him.

I wish we saw Peter being creepy and her feeling vulnerable before she slowly steels her spine because she’s gaining confidence in herself.

The way they’re showing this makes it seem less like she’s wavering in her new view of the world and her place in it and more like the director or editor fucked up in the order of events.

“I have to say, Scott, I continue to be impressed with your ingenuity.” I’m going to be honest, it didn’t even occur to me that Scott was responsible for the announcement. I thought she was just lying to get away from him, but now I am also very impressed.

Quite a leap there, Kate. Not that she’s particularly good with logic.

I do like Melissa, even if she’s bad at her job, and I do love the sweet relationship that she and Scott have.

Oh, buddy, alcohol seems like a bad idea.

Scott, you’re going to rip those pants again.

You’d think Scott would have trauma from the bleachers.

Uh, Stiles? What the hell? That was like one step removed from negging, and I’m not a fan.

So many of those people are not high schoolers.

Is it weird to anyone else that Danny’s sexuality has been used to manipulate people twice now? Once Danny and now the Coach. I mean, we’ve seen other characters use their own sexuality to manipulate people on this show, but it’s other people using Danny’s sexuality, and that seems weird. Am I reading too much into that?

Is that the Alpha or the Argents with night vision goggles? Who knows?

Uh, you better not be letting Lydia go alone Stiles.

I can’t believe it took me this long to see it, but Jackson’s arc is running parallel to Allison’s: both want to stop being afraid. Both want power. Both are very much in over their heads.

Okay, not night vision goggles, but still Argents. Oop, and Chris still thinks he’s the beta.

Oh, hey, nice that we got insight into why Allison’s not mad at Scott ditching her in his room. Kind of wish that line drop had happened earlier. I wonder if a scene got cut where they showed that conversation, which led to Allison asking  Lydia to go with Stiles. Because that still makes no sense whatsoever.

“You promise you won’t hurt him?” Holy shit, that came out of nowhere. Like two weeks earlier Jackson fucked up the Molotov cocktail on purpose to try and get Scott killed. And then earlier in this episode it was heavily implied that Scott was physically violent with him.

Oh. I just had a wild fucking thought that is undoubtedly not true, but is literally that only thing that would explain Jackson’s change of heart with both Allison as well as the one in this scene with Chris.

So we’ve already seen with Derek that a beta who is overwhelmed can accidentally transfer memories to Jackson via claws to the neck and also not realize that he’s done it. What if after Scott slammed Jackson against the door he tried to hold him in place by the throat, but when Jackson tried to shove him off, Scott’s claws slipped out. Maybe punctured the same marks that Derek made. Maybe some of Scott’s recent trauma bled through the link that Derek already created.

It would explain why Jackson was willing to help Allison, but also why he was so sweaty and jumpy about it. And it would explain why he doesn’t want Chris to hurt a guy he didn’t give a shit about before because he got whispers of Scott’s trauma but also his kindness and empathy.

This is my headcanon until proven otherwise.

This conversation is all over the place. Yay for Scott telling her how he feels, but I kind of feel like the other conversation was a tad more important.

Well this can’t be good.

But also, fucking lol at this dramatic shit. Peter flipping switches out there to find the right ones for when someone wandered his way.

Lydia, take off your heels and run, girl.

“You’re the clever one, Stiles.” Umm, I’m going to need a clear example of Stiles being clever. Like, he’s clearly smart, he can clearly research, but his plans are always slapdash and only sometimes work.

Maybe that’s just Peter’s way of calling him a smartass.

Also, Stiles, what have you been hiding?

Okay 1) why the fuck would Stiles think that? Again, Derek’s not a particularly great strategist either, and even if he was a great strategist, what evidence has Stiles seen of that, and 2) why didn’t Stiles tell Scott when Scott was panicking about it earlier?

Scott does not have good associations with these busses, Allison. Also, y’all about to get got by Mr. Argent.

Gross, Allison, you don’t know where that glass has been.

Chris, I know that Jackson told you the truth, but you don’t actually know that Jackson told you the truth, and you could have vehicularly manslaughtered a sixteen year old kid right then.

I feel that Scott’s capable enough to make that leap without shifting, and it would have been so fucking funny if he hadn’t, actually.

P.S. I want you to know that I went back and watched the part in the last episode at full brightness like six times and there is literally nothing to indicate Derek took Scott’s phone, and - again - literally no reason to think Stiles would know that he did. This episode should have been called deus ex machina.

In conclusion, 1) why do all of these adults keep going to the sixteen year old to track each other down? 2) setting up consistent characterizations for a season and then switching them up in the second to last episode is, how shall I put this? Bad. And 3) why was Deaton not in this episode way more?

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Teen Wolf 1x10

Panic for Stiles derailed by a pretty girl. That’s fair.

Scott doesn’t know how to use the ‘you too’ phrase. SAME, MY DUDE.

SHE BROUGHT HER A GAME. Why is Allison so damn cute? Like, for real, Scott, I get you on this.

I am so confused about Danny’s role on this team. I thought he was the goalie? Wouldn’t Scott passing it to Danny be, like, a bad thing? Unless Danny got himself some goalie goals, which are awesome and should be revered.

“Apology accepted.” Scott, you should have apologized with actual words, but I’m glad you’re on good terms with Danny at least. You don’t have a lot of people on your side these days.

Ummm, running would be a good option. Also putting on pants.

TELL ME THIS IS NOT FUCKFACE JOINING UP WITH PETER TO TERRORIZE A HALF NAKED SIXTEEN YEAR OLD BOY IN A LOCKER ROOM. TELL ME HE WOULD NOT ACTUALLY STOOP THIS LOW.

Although, I did kind of call this in like episode two. I mean, they weren’t actually working together then, but literally the episode after the Alpha reveal they’re working together, so I claim prescience anyway.

Couple of things:

That must’ve either been one hell of an explanation from Peter or Fuckface was just itching to be even more of a terrible person and waiting for an excuse.

OR, I will grudgingly admit that he might be doing this to ingratiate himself with Peter while still planning to kill him. Not to help Scott or anyone but himself, of course, but at least it just keeps him at the same amount of trash bag terribleness instead of downgrading him to utter dumpster fire.

Where the hell is Stiles? Maybe he did run? Maybe they have him stuffed in a locker? The timing here is very weird, because if Stiles ran, then why wouldn’t he have gotten to the game first? I mean, he had a car and Peter and Fuckface don’t. Unless they took Jennifer’s car, I guess.

Did they, like, clean up all the blood and glass from the hospital or is some janitor super pissed right now?

Oh, he just wants to kill the responsible ones. Like, the school janitor, or those two dudes in the forest. Or Laura Hale.

I was about to say, I can’t imagine a sixteen year old kid being like, cool, I’ll help you murder people, but then I remembered Jackson.

So I get why Scott is feeling justifiably betrayed. But also, Scott. He’s been dogshit this whole time so this is not a shock to some of us.

Oh Peter is much better at manipulation than Fuckface is.

So we already had the dichotomy of Scott and Fuckface where Scott’s anchor to his humanity is love and his ability to control the shift is driven by his relationships and his willingness to help and comfort. Whereas Fuckface is all about anger and pain.

And now we have the dichotomy with Peter who is willing to maim/manipulate/murder anyone and everyone to achieve his goals, and Scott who’s driven to protect people.

Huh, so the claws in the neck thing is a way to transfer memories. Clearly it’s not just Alphas who can do that. I’m still uncertain as to why Jackson was so affected by Peter’s roar though since Fuckface was the one to do that to him. Is Fuckface automatically part of his pack through bloodlines? If so, why couldn’t he track him instead of terrorizing Scott?

I guess the random douchebags in the forest were a part of the plot.

Okay so, first, there was this movie in the 90s called The Crow where (spoiler alert) the protagonist kills the antagonist by giving him 30 hours of pain all at once. Great scene, very cathartic. 

Second, we’re supposed to believe that Peter’s been changed by all of his trauma because of watching/hearing his whole family die and then spending six years in a coma. Changed enough that he killed his own niece.

Trauma, which he then dumped all onto a sixteen year old boy, all at once. I’m surprised Scott isn’t dead or insane from that, honestly.

I just…this kid has been almost constantly facing his own trauma over the last two and a half months and now he’s had six years worth of trauma dumped on him and…Derek just watched. Like. He just watched it happen. He helped it happen.

I know most of the season has been leading up to killing Peter, and he 100% deserves it and needs to be stopped. But I just can’t get over all the points in the show where they’ve tried to make Derek sympathetic and then they just have him watch this. This thing that (theoretically) made his Uncle go insane and kill his own niece. He just let it happen to Scott right in front of him and walked away.

I hope he dies too.

Oh. Hey Stiles. Glad you’re not stuffed in a locker. Did you stop to get some ice cream on the way? Why the fuck did it take you so long?

Little Spider-Man kiss action.

It’s so funny that her spicy dream about Scott kissing her derails so entirely by the missing necklace that she immediately needs to get up to look for it.

Wow, Chris isn’t very observant. Pretty sure Kate saw her though.

Yup.

Lol, Chris, buddy. You are bad at subtle.

Oooh, I wonder when/how Allison found out about that?

Is this, like, a group of abandoned high rises? Once again, Beacon Hills is like a guy selling watches in NYC: we got your city, we got your woods, we got your rich suburbs, we got your abandoned brutalist architecture.

Once again Jackson’s like, I am a fair, gentle, helpless man and if you touch me I might be overcome in a fit of vapors. 

Lol, Scott and Stiles riding up to save him. How did you even find him, boys?

Oh. Oh, I was wondering about why we didn’t get more of the aftermath with Scott. He is very much not having a good time. At least some of this reaction has gotta be a side effect of getting Peter’s everything dumped into his head, yeah? Except instead of driving him insane it’s just driving him to protect people more and making him frustrated when he can’t.

But, I’m sorry, is that it? Is that all we fucking get of the aftermath of that attack? Like, either Peter just didn’t feel that much anguish about the whole thing and he’s just always been a lying, manipulative killer or they’re deliberately choosing to minimize Scott’s trauma again. I just don’t understand why they would take that route with their main character.

And here’s the thing about Jackson: he already tried to kill Scott. He would have no issue with killing somebody if it gets him what he wants.

But Scott wants to protect people, even the awful ones. We literally saw it from his first painful change where he immediately swallowed down his own trauma because he was worried about Allison. Peter just went and picked a beta with moral fortitude and a stubborn streak.

I like how Jackson sneeringly said he drives a Porsche when just a few minutes ago it was ‘dead’ behind him, he was being intimidated by a man with a large gun, and Scott had to save him. But, sure, he can totally drive a Porsche.

Pet peeve, he’s pronouncing the word wrong. I had it drilled into me at 22 that it’s Por-shuh.

“We’re about to find out,” Allison says, and then immediately after is like, I don’t know.

Also, why would you put a weapon down to investigate a noise? No, more importantly, why would you need to investigate a random noise in the forest? They’re full of random noises. There is a difference between brave and stupid, Allison.

Oh, well I guess she’s still armed. That’s fair.

But Christ, can Scott catch a fucking break this episode?

Oh jeez, Scott, I thought you were getting better at lying, but you’re really not.

I feel a tiny bit sorry for Lydia left alone with a very large weapon she doesn’t know how to use in a creepy forest.

Oh, Stiles. Bud, what are you doing? You’ve had no problem in the past getting info without trying to get your dad drunk about it.

Sheriff, that’s a little more than an ounce. And it hit you really fucking fast. Is he on meds or something? Or did he already have a few?

So everyone’s connected but the janitor. Don’t forget the janitor in Peter’s list of murders.

At least Stiles knows he’s doing a bad thing. There’s still no reason for it, because they’ve shown multiple times that Stiles can get information from his dad’s files seemingly at will. So that makes it worse.

I guess I’m glad Stiles stopped him there. Drinking to relax is much different than drinking from grief.

Oh my god. Is Scott, who’s being hunted by these people, really coming up with excuses for them? Like, I get why’s he’s trying to keep Allison out of this, but, uh, don’t protect her family’s lies, kiddo. That’s not going to help anyone.

Wow, Melissa, you look super cute!

Why do I have a bad feeling about this medical rep?

Ooop, yup. That’s Peter.

There has to be a reason why he hasn’t tried to change more people when Scott turned out to be a thorn in his side. Weird that he didn’t go after someone like Jackson though. Huh, I wonder if he can’t turn someone else until Scott either accepts him or dies. But why wouldn’t he just kill Scott and try for someone else? There has to be some sort of in universe reason, not just he’s the main character.

I wonder if he’s actually happy that Scott’s fighting him so much. The stronger the willpower Scott has, the stronger the beta he’ll be, the stronger the pack Peter will have. Derek just rolled over for him, but Scott’s a prize, right? To be able to corrupt both his innocence and his morality would be a major coup to a guy like Peter.

Not that that would stop him from hurting, Melissa. I’m just saying, there’s probably a reason why he wouldn’t turn her. 

Oh he’s one of those guys that is weird about WWII. Yeah, that tracks.

Oh, poor, baby. Scott very much needs a hug.

I hated that music transition.

Uuuuuuuugh. So either they can change others at any time and didn’t for some unknown reason, or Peter’s real confident that Scott’s going to cave. Could go either way.

I will not be mad if the Argent’s kill Jackson, actually.

Scott, I understand why you’re rushing off to protect your mom, but, like, I feel like this isn’t exactly going to be a quick trip and you’re probably just going to piss Allison off by asking her to stay.

Wow, he didn’t even wait before being creepy with her.

Lol, that was actually so smart Scott! And way to jump in and help Stiles!

Funny that the street was totally empty and now there’s multiple cars being blocked behind them.

I’m not sure it’s a good thing that Peter is impressed by how smart you are Scott.

Ooooh maybe he’s just using Jackson as bait. Could be that too. And, hard agree that Jackson is a dumbass.

All I’m getting from this is that Derek can at least fake supportiveness and helpfulness and there’s no reason he had to put Scott through everything that he did, even if he had to be a fake ass bitch to do it.

Does Derek not yet realize that he transferred his memories with the claws? I guess maybe he wouldn’t, since he’s seen none of the repercussions of it.

I guess this is like a win/win for Peter. If no one shows then he gets Derek to kill Jackson for him and protect their secret. If Scott shows then he gets to go after Scott.

You know what? Danny clearly cares about Jackson; his parents clearly care about him. It’s not that no one cares, it’s that Jackson doesn’t seem to care back. Not enough anyway. The failure is in him, not others.

I also have to wonder how hard Derek is projecting here, since he also has the cool car and the cool hair, but still has no one. Which, again, I would argue, that the failure is in him.

And then we have Scott. Who has no reason to care about either of them. Who has reason to hate both of them. And yet he’s risked his life to save them both multiple times.

There’s a quote that I kind of hate from Doctor Who. “All that pain, that misery, and loneliness. And it just made it kind.” Because no, absolutely not. People can choose kindness in the midst of their pain, misery and loneliness. It’s work, and it’s hard, and it takes effort every single fucking time. But pain and misery and loneliness don’t make someone kind.

Jackson who has barely had any of that that wasn’t from his own making, is not kind. Derek is clearly in the midst of all of that, but it certainly hasn’t fucking made him kind. I think it’s a big mistake to write off Scott as innately kind (no one is innately kind) instead of someone who is making a choice to be kind.

Personal story time. About five years ago I met the kindest person I had ever met. She was a little old lady who never said a bad word about anyone, who always gave people the benefit of the doubt. We were internal customer facing and she generally dealt with a lot of unpleasant people.

As I got to know her, I heard about her partner’s health issues, about her adult son who she was supporting because he once again couldn’t hold down a job. I heard about her persistent insomnia which had her averaging 4-5 hours of sleep a night. But she was unfailingly kind.

One day when I was incredibly angry we went out to lunch and I asked her how she did it. And she told me that her father had not been kind, and that when she was a child she had a lot of anger in her because of it and she would lash out at anyone and everyone. And one day she lashed out and she saw her father in herself. And from that day forward, she chose to be kind.

Sorry about the tangent, but kindness gets treated like it’s something simple and costs you nothing, and that’s absolutely not true. I don’t work with her anymore but we keep in touch, and that lady is still one of the strongest fucking people I ever met.

And while Scott’s not quite at her level of steel, she has probably fifty year on him, and I can see him getting there.

Oh shit, I actually forgot about the Argents.

Oh no! Scott was hit! He really has had a rough episode. I think this is one of the most brutal if I’m not mistaken.

Is Derek actually being helpful again!? This makes two whole times!

Oh lord, I just thought about something….is Allison going to find something incriminating in Scott’s room? Does Scott even have anything incriminating? Eh, it looks like she’s just going to leave and be disappointed in him again.

Oh no, it was a wolfsbane bullet. I mean, that makes sense, but also it’s not like Kate had many of them and she wasn’t really sharpshooting through that door.

Holy shit, Deaton! We haven’t heard from him since Derek kidnapped him and beat him up. It’s been at least a couple of weeks, right? Has Scott even been going to work?

Are we going to figure out why he was so shifty with the Sheriff and Derek?

That’s definitely just a regular wound now. He clearly knows about werewolves and wolfsbane.

Who are you, Deaton?! What do you know?

His little smirk. I love it.

This reveal is too fucking long. It’s either Derek or Jackson or both, and she’d’ve had more reaction to Jackson ergo it’s Derek. It went past creepy and into annoying.

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Teen Wolf 1x09

The Chemistry teacher cleaning off what looks like an already cleaned chalkboard and sighing about it is hilarious to me. Have him kicking the photocopier after it errors out for the third time in the middle of making 200 copies of something, it would be way more realistic.

So I’m guessing this is Adrian Harris then, and he does actually know something about what’s happening.

The Alpha has fairly neat handwriting, good for them. 

The little red x’s somehow make it funnier than crossed out names. Like, this dude went and found a different pen color for the drama.

Are we supposed to think that all the other Harris’ are dead or just not the right Harris? Could go either way with the Alpha.

Eliet is the weirdest way to spell that name that I’ve ever seen.

Oh, I’m sorry, Professor Adrian Harris. So this dude either taught college and got fired/lost his job but insisted on hanging onto the title or he’s got an advanced degree of some kind and doesn’t want to (or maybe can’t) get hired at a college. Yeah, he’s got enough of an ego that that tracks. 

Eeewww, why is his hand wet?

Oh, hey, Laura Hale wrote that list! Clearly dramatics run in the Hale family.

First time we hear the Alpha! Absolutely no way to figure out who it is from the voice. But waiting so long makes this particular moment seem incredibly important.

Also, I’m assuming it’s only Alpha’s that go into this much larger, stereotypical werewolf shape, and that they’re the only ones with red eyes and voices that change.

Still don’t know why Scott and Fuckface have two different eye colors, and still don’t know why Laura was in the form of an actual wolf.

More than halfway through with the season and we still basically don’t know anything about werewolves. Awesome. Love that world building. Why would you have a werewolf mentor character and not actually use him for exposition about werewolves: their abilities, their culture, their history? Oh right, cause Derek is a fuckface, not a mentor.

I don’t buy that the cops got there when they did. They haven’t been very good at their jobs thus far, and there’s no reason to think that they’d spend all that manpower to surround the whole school.

Also, like, we didn’t get anything of importance so why the fuck did the Alpha even speak? That was badly done, imo.

It would have been funnier if Fuckface just holed up in the school and waited until the next day. Again, I don’t think they have that many cops and that school’s huge.

Also, didn’t the lacrosse field back up to the woods? Like, I feel like he could have snuck through the woods. But, whatever, we have foot chase, I guess.

Lol, poor Scott trying to drive Fuckface’s car while being chased by Kate. Awful position to be in, why are you even here?

Again I say, poor puppies.

So what we’re supposed to be getting from this is that Kate isn’t a very good driver and Chris isn’t a very good shot, right?

It’s fun how Fuckface takes absolutely no responsibility for the position he’s in. Completely blames it all on Scott, who, may I reiterate is a sixteen year old boy who literally did nothing wrong. Who was violently attacked, beat up multiple times, shot, stalked, had his mind manipulated, and threatened with murder.

All, while Fuckface did, what? I mean, like, obviously he came to Beacon Hills to follow his sister, found her dead, buried her and then did what? Like, Laura at least had a list of names and probably more than that. She was following some sort of clues, doing some sort of investigation, but all Fuckface has been doing was randomly tracking the Alpha’s scent, stalking Scott, threatening Scott, beating up on Scott, yelling at his comatose uncle, attacking Deaton, and almost getting dead twice. 

How is it that he has way more puzzle pieces than Scott does, is way older than Scott, and yet is looking to Scott for plans, then getting pissy when those plans don’t work out? Like, he’s sixteen, back off. Fuck.

Sooo, Fuckface has had two months to talk to Harris or look through his shit and has done nothing with it? Sounds about right.

Aaand, now we have Allison’s necklace. Let me guess. They’re going to make Scott ask Allison about it instead of Stiles. Because it’s not like Stiles hasn’t been known to fixate on weird things and wasn’t the one recently broken up with.

Why aren’t the just researching the symbol like Allison did? Again, Stiles loves a good deep dive, why do we even need to start with the necklace that she only just started wearing like the week before.

Also, I reiterate, Fuckface has had two months with this knowledge and done nothing with it,

So did Fuckface infect Jackson with his memories? Or is Captain Douchebag a Hale by birth? Actually that would make so much sense considering his personality.

Oh, so this is a hallucination. Got it.

So Fuckface poisoned him. Lol. 

Jackson just asking a nurse to look something up on her computer is hilarious. I mean, the physical security has been a little lax, so I can’t imagine the computer security is much better, but still. 

OH MY GOD, NO, WTF MRS MCCALL?! I expected you to say no! Massive breach in protocol: HIPAA violations, ethics violations, security violations. Anything he does under your password you would be liable for! You are breaking federal law!

Christ Jackson, you are a rich bitch and you couldn’t have looked that up on your own computer?

Oh good, a medical billing summary. SO MANY VIOLATIONS.

Also, the time on the computer reads 2:59 am.

Jackson does the same thing Fuckface does, he’s cruel and a bully to those he thinks are weaker and meek against those he thinks are stronger than him.

Funny how he both thinks Scott is weaker, but also thinks Scott is a werewolf.

So, one thing I really hate in this show is that no one tells anyone their plans before they do them, and it always ends badly. Like, I get that you want to keep the audience from knowing the plan, but it’s so stupid how everyone essentially works in silos so no one really knows what anyone else is doing. It’s like they’re working together, but not actually working together. I hate it.

Did Scott & Allison switch English classes or did Stiles & Lydia? Because this is the lady who ran the parent teacher conference for Lydia and Allison, but she is not the teacher in the pilot who was teaching Kafka to Scott, Stiles, and Allison.

Maybe she’s like a drama teacher? Sure, we’ll go with that.

Also, Othello is an interesting choice. Like, not for the jealousy part. But. The man of color marrying a white woman without her father’s approval who ends up killing her because of the machinations of someone else? I’m not, like, casting Fuckface as Iago here, but I’m not NOT casting him as Iago either.

Oh, poor Allison.

Scott is so clueless here. He shouldn’t be, but he is. You broke her trust, kiddo, which can often be much more fragile than love. You’re going to have to work to get that back.

Scott you are correct that you know nothing about girls, but she is being super rational from her point of view, not psychotic. Don’t be a dick just because you don’t understand.

Again, why should Scott steal the necklace? Stiles has stolen like at least three things successfully that we’ve seen. Wouldn’t it make more sense if it was him?

There are so many close ups on Jackson this episode I’m afraid the camera’s just going to go down his throat one of these scenes.

Funny how Jackson keeps calling Scott a cheater, but it’s clear that he doesn’t actually care about cheating because he wants the same abilities. I mean, I know he’s just using it as manipulation, but I hate entitled shits like that.

If they win tonight they’re in the semifinals after two months of playing? What kind of half assed season does lacrosse have?

I mean, I don’t like Lydia either and they totally shouldn’t be dating, but again, this cruelty for cruelty’s sake is so frustrating to watch.

Oh. Good. Fuckface is making more terrible choices. And still throwing teenage boys against walls and threatening them.

Once again, 16 year old boys are doing more investigating than the grown man. And once again this is more like a procedural than a werewolf show. I mean, I guess that’s a choice.

Scott, breaking into a hunter’s house that is also you ex girlfriend’s house is not a good idea, and I know that you’re not, strictly speaking, doing this for Fuckface, but I also need you to recognize that he would never do this for you.

Goddammit Stiles, I don’t even care that you’re technically helping, this is a personality trait of yours that I truly hate.

Why the fuck would Fuckface be in the room with Danny when he’s a known fugitive. Like, it’s not like I knew the faces of known fugitives when I was in high school, but if I was a baby hacker and someone attacked my bff and his girlfriend, I’d probably have a good idea of what he looked like.

Also, is Fuckface reading the dictionary? Yeah, that’s subtle.

So either Fuckface knows what’s happening and is playing along or he really is a complete moron.

Once again, I feel like he should be taking pictures of the book instead of looking up words he doesn’t know. Although he didn’t get caught, so go Scott, I guess.

Honestly, Melissa’s pretty lax with her computer security. It could be anyone. I wonder how the Alpha got from the school to the hospital and back again in such a short period of time particularly since the school is at least a mile away from anything as per a previous episode.

Bets that the Alpha has an accomplice?

Oh shit! Hold up. Is the Alpha actually Peter Hale and the accomplice his nurse? The nurse would have no problem walking into a hospital and using the terminal, but mostly we’ve seen her and Peter several times with no follow up so far. They have to be important.

Kate being, like, Hey, you don’t have to be psychotic to be a killer. And then she does something, uh, really freaking creepy. I think the sex and violence wires got intertwined in her brain.

Again, what is it with not sharing information? Scott didn’t mention the book, and Stiles didn’t mention the info about the text. Sharing info is better, my dudes. Informed decisions are better.

Nope, nope, NOPE. Goddamn this guy.

So, he got what Stiles was doing, went along with it, but then punished him for it violently later.

I hate everything about this guy and I hate that they’re working with him. Can’t we just leave him to suffer and die in his burnt out house?

Why does everyone act like Scott should know things that are not obvious? Like, I’ve known people for years who don’t know what my name means. And, like, people aren’t stupid just because they don’t know French or whatever.

Question, did Jennifer, like, clear the building? Why is there no one anywhere?

Well, I mean, has Peter given up on Scott killing his ‘pack’ so that he can join Peter’s? Cause if not, then Stiles is safe. Fuckface isn’t safe, though, Peter, feel free to kill your nephew.

Also, did Peter turn Jennifer?

Apparently not.

His mind and personality was burned out of him and he killed Laura on instinct. Okay, that’s plausible. But, uh, the deer with the revenge spiral was three months ago and clearly was one of the things that got Laura looking into things back in Beacon Hills. Was that instinct too or was that premeditated to pull Laura back there to kill her and get the Alpha powers to push you over that plateau? I feel like the second is more likely.

So Harris had a drinking problem. Maybe that’s why he’s teaching high school now. And he knows nothing about werewolves, just twitchy about the Hale fire. I might buy that. I might not.

They show an awful lot of Fuckface crawling on the ground. He’s not very good in a fight.

Do you think Stiles ran? Probably not, but wouldn’t it be great if he did?

I was going to wait for dramatic flair, he says, being dramatic. Ugh. All of these Hale’s suck. I mean, I don’t know about Laura, but I’m guessing.

Kate’s gross. And also dumb. If Jackson had turned those scars would be long gone by now. Scott’s wound healed in less than 24 hours and it was much worse.

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Teen Wolf 1x08

Why does Scott keep going along with Stiles’ plans when they’re all, um, bad?

Also, I feel like drinking out in the woods while being stalked by a supernatural creature that just tried to kill you is perhaps a terrible idea.

Does alcohol even work on Scott anymore? If his healing’s accelerated I feel like he’d never get more than a buzz. And I’m so glad my thoughts match drunk Stiles. My life is complete.

Is this the first time Scott has actually gone looking for a fight? I mean, not hyped up on anger (even though I don’t remember him starting the physical fights with Fuckface, I think Fuckface always started those).

And yet he still he controls his shift and doesn’t do anything violent to the dudes, just throws the bottle. He is just so diametrically opposed to Fuckface.

The only interaction where Fuckface didn’t actually lose his cool was with Chris Argent. In fact, Fuckface will easily enact violence against those weaker than him, but can hold his temper against those stronger with the exception of Kate. I’m guessing the outlier isn’t Chris, but Kate because it’s personal with her.

Scott doesn’t ever seem to choose violence first, which is why he’s struggled so much with the change.

And Fuckface tried to get him to believe that anger and pain were the keys to controlling the change, but the keys for Scott were connection and love.

So theoretically the reason the Alpha is killing is for revenge. We don’t really know why, but that’s the implication. There’s something specific about Laura, the bus driver, the video clerk, and the Argents.

And the janitor was to torment Scott. But why these guys? 

Not that I don’t get it, Scott. But, uh, you just found out that the Alpha wants you to kill her, so maybe some space right now isn’t a bad thing.

Stiles’ concern for his dad’s physical wellbeing is sweet. I just wish that concern extended a bit more to Scott as well.

They really do put Scott in red a lot. I mean, it’s a good color on him, but also (color theory!) can be used for both anger and love. A coincidence, probably, but it’s what I’m going with.

The autistic experience of sensory overload. I have been there, my friend.

We also love a good panic attack.

So Stiles’ mom is actually dead, and he got panic attacks. Yeah, that tracks.

The lighting in this scene from the circling fan is making my eyes wig out and I literally cannot watch it.

I wonder if this has just as much to do with the fact that he only just accepted that Allison is his anchor to his humanity and now he feels adrift, right before the full moon. Not just about heartbreak, but about a loss of self.

I’m actually a little bit face blind, but the Detective the Sheriff brought in is one of the hunters, right? I recognize the tie from earlier.

I wonder why Mrs. Argent isn’t more involved with the hunting. Like, was that her choice or is that just how the hunters are and Kate’s the anomaly.

I am not a fan of Scott casually hurting himself. I very much think it’s essentially due to having lost his anchor right before the full moon, but self destructive tendencies are more Fuckface’s bailiwick and I don’t like to see Scott falling into that.

Well Danny clearly has the most team spirit out of everyone. And also he’s right. Amazing how he can be friends with Jackson, actually.

I know Stiles is like, the King of ‘this is not the time’, but dammit, Stiles, read the fucking room. Your bff literally said to you maybe a couple hours earlier that he was afraid he might kill someone, and with the exception of the panic attack, Scott has had flat affect the whole day. And while I understand adding levity to certain situations can help, this is not the fucking time.

Once again, Scott going along with something he shouldn’t. Mostly because Lydia has made it excruciatingly obvious that she’s not into Stiles. Also because Scott is clearly not working on all cylinders and expecting him to try to actively use the senses when he’s all messed up about them is not going to end well.

Lol. Scott, bro. You are too messed up to handle this situation.

So Lydia started going after Scott, and Jackson started going after Allison, and I’m willing to bet Lydia is now going to shoot her shot with Scott. Not because she wants him but because she wants to hurt Jackson and she doesn’t care who else is in the crossfire.

That’s the thing with toxic relationships, they always seem to pull others into their mess.

Ugh, why is she like this? Saying one thing to Allison and the complete opposite to Scott. And for what? Jackson isn’t even worth it? Why torch like three relationships for this?

Well, Scott, the request from Stiles was dumb, but saying that Lydia’s into him was a shitty thing to do. I mean, I know you’re not in your right mind but still.

Total aside, but I actually hate how the best player on the team is often given the captaincy. It happens in professional sports too and drives me bonkers. The best player is not always the best leader.

Poor Danny.

Interesting to see that Jackson actually does care about someone other than himself.

Oh, so Scott’s actually gone completely off the deep end and doesn’t give a shit about anything i.e. complete loss of self. That happened scarily quick. If this is what happens when you lose your anchor, I wonder if this happened to Fuckface somewhere along the line and he just never recovered.

Confirmation that Kate is training Allison without permission. Good to know.

Omg, Stiles, boundaries.

Okay, so. No. First Stiles gets ‘payback’ for Scott (the sixteen year old) not protecting his dad (THE SHERIFF) and now Stiles wants payback for Scott kissing Lydia. Like, that’s not fucking how friendships work! Sometimes friends do shitty things to each other, and it sucks and hopefully you can talk about it and work through it. You don’t get to demand payback if your friends do something that you don’t like.

I absolutely hate this side of Stiles, I really do. Like, he crosses people’s boundaries all the time, he steals things, he can sometimes just act shitty, but that doesn’t give his friends the right to punish him.

Once again, he’s acting like such a cop’s kid (derogatory). He gets a free ride, but everyone else deserves to be punished.

To clarify, Scott definitely needs to be locked up right now, but the reasoning is askew.

Oh, so it’s not physical violence this time, just humiliation. Cool.

And, like, why would Stiles be taunting him, when it’s not like the cuffs are that strong? This is going to be the scene with the Alpha all over again. Stiles thinks he has him trapped, spouts off and then very much realizes that he’s not trapped. Dipshit.

Also, going all the way back to the beginning (yes, it’s Kafka again, shut up) are we going to lock him in a room and treat him as monstrous and expect him to end up not acting like a monster? How much would it actually cost to be kind for one night?

For the last three hours you thought all of that and then just…decided to be mean anyway? I guess that’s a choice.

Scott sounds like an addict. I wonder if that was intentional.

Again, we only got like five seconds of Scott’s agony of the transformation and then immediately switched to someone else. We almost got more reaction from Stiles than of Scott. Why do they keep doing that?

Aaand the tiger He destroyed his cage The tiger is out

(Apologies to Nael, Age 6 for changing your poem).

The amount of, like, mental manipulation being forcibly changed into a werewolf involves is ridiculous. Fugue states, hallucinations, mind control, lucid dreaming. Scott can’t trust his body or his mind anymore.

Wow, is Fuckface actually being useful for once? Crazy.

Hate to say this Fuckface, but, uh. It wasn’t pain that brought Scott back, it was you howling in his face. 

Scott sad, breathless little thanks is killing me.

Even though he just did something nice, I can’t give Fuckface the benefit of the doubt. I know he prefaced it with that it might not work, but I still think he’s just using Scott to get to the Alpha. Whether he wants to kill him in revenge or he wants Scott to, I don’t know. But, like, I don’t trust his motives.

Still hate the CGI wolf.

That hiding spot is not very keep it secret, keep it safe of you Jackson. 

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Teen Wolf 1x07

Still hate the CGI wolf.

Stiles, I know you’re kind of uncoordinated and flaily, but you could have done that faster. Even better, Scott could have done that much faster.

The issue here is that schools have a ridiculous number of entrances.

Nah, I don’t believe it’s Deaton. Like, I think he knows more than he’s saying, but I don’t think it’s him. He likes Scott way too much to torment him like this.

The car battery through the window is actually hilarious.

Locker room is good, but, like, do they have a shop class at this school, because I feel like that may have some useful weapons.

Why did Scott forget that if you’re trying to hide your own noises then the best thing to do is get other things to make a lot of noise. Both Scott and Fuckface have been briefly incapacitated due to loud noises.

Scott, a good boy, whose first reaction is to try to help instead of running.

Stiles, I really feel like the flashlight is more bad than good at this point.

Them outrunning the Alpha is kind of funny. 

So there’s three people that could have contacted Allison: Fuckface and Deaton are super unlikely, so it’s most likely the Alpha, but why? Is it because she’s an Argent?

Lydia looking at Jackson like that because of how he was acting with Allison is hilarious with the amount of times she’s looked at Scott like a snack.

They need to invest in a dog whistle for Stiles and earplugs for Scott.

So, you know how Stiles has this thing where he just does whatever he wants because he rarely has to face consequences because of who his dad is? Yeah, as it turns out, that’s a terrible trait to have.

I would not have given Scott this much leeway. I’d’ve left far sooner.

That is a really big/nice pool set up for a rural high school. Wow.

You know, it’s been a little annoying in previous episodes, but in this episode those super long fucking pauses while everyone looks around fearfully are incredibly frustrating and keep pulling me out of the scene. They’re all panicked except when they want a suspenseful beat and that’s such bad writing/directing/editing. There are ways to do suspenseful beats that make sense and they are very much not doing that in this episode.

Again, somehow four kids are beating the Alpha in a straight sprint. Buddy, my suspension of disbelief can only stretch so far.

This is my least favorite episode so far.

Just say the fucking thing Stiles! For a guy who’s never waited to talk, there’s no reason for you to be waiting for their complete attention. And then when you have it you still find the time to be sarcastic. Ugh.

I don’t know is a perfectly reasonable answer here, and also it’s the truth.

Blaming Fuckface is okay too, but I feel like that’s going to bite you in the ass later.

I love how they’re all turning to Scott like he’s supposed to know when realistically speaking (if this were not supernatural shenanigans) how would he possibly know the answer to that?

Well, you didn’t actually have to say anything, but I still agree with Stiles about throwing Fuckface under the bus. Why is it that I only seem to agree with Stiles when it comes to Fuckface?

Jackson deserved to keep punched in his smug little face, tbh.

Out of curiosity, why are we not haranguing Allison to call her dad? The man also has an arsenal, and did better against the mountain lion than the Sheriff did.

Oh, hey, Chemistry classroom. Molotov cocktail anyone?

Nice, Lydia.

Scott is a horrible liar.

I feel like they could make more in the room for if he goes after them instead of Scott. Like, just in case.

Why did he move the janitor’s body? Why would they think he moved the janitor’s body and that Scott would have to track it by smell so that he was the only one who could find it. It would only make sense if the Alpha knew that they would need something from the janitor to get out and they didn’t need anything from him until they went into that specific room. I’m calling plot hole on that.

Jackson you’re a stupid son of a bitch. Trying to murder Scott is going to get you, what? In this scenario it’s still going to leave you trapped and defenseless against something that terrifies you.

I really don’t understand why Jackson was like halfway to death and then was fine, but is now experiencing some of the pain that Scott is when he wasn’t bitten by an Alpha and certainly was bitten by that Alpha. It doesn’t make any sense. I feel like the more convoluted they make this the more stupid it’s going to be.

Okay, I’m stupid too. He got Allison there to force Scott to change so could kill her together and bond, which is why he’s been toying with them instead of just killing them.

Still, doesn’t explain the janitor.

We have had so many goddamn shots in this episode with Scott slowing walking through the school that honestly haven’t provided anything useful, not even suspense. It would make way more sense for Scott to have sprinted back to the Chemistry room acting out of his mind.

Did we really wait through all of that to get the big emotional beat without even seeing Scott’s face? What the fuck kind of choice was that? We should have seen it up close, in much better lighting, and we should have seen his eyes. Oh my god, I am a terrible director, but that was literally the worst choice they could have made. Also, we didn’t need the flashback, those were both filler and annoying.

This is definitely my least favorite episode.

Fuckface’s car is gone. I can’t imagine the Alpha took it, so I’m guessing Fuckface is still alive.

Imagining the Alpha mopping the floor to cover up the evidence is funny.

Not like the cops can pretend ripping open Stiles’ hood and throwing the battery were imaginary. Or even something that they could have done themselves.

You know what? I love Scott and I feel bad for him, but Allison’s totally right. You can’t fault the girl for this choice, it’s completely understandable.

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I’ve gotten a few comments and some followers and I just wanted to let folks know a couple of things.

I’m not going to follow anyone back. Nothing personal, it’s just y’all clearly like the show and I’m trying to remain as spoiler free as possible.

I’m trying to remain as spoiler free as possible. Spoilers, in my experience, never give context and I’ve never gotten a spoiler that didn’t have an opinion attached to it.

I do consider, “just wait until you get to x part,” and “you’ll change your mind about this character in x episode/season,” a spoiler.

After this warning, if you give me a spoiler I will block you. Again, nothing personal.

These are all my opinions and I don’t expect everyone to agree with them. I won’t take it personally if you disagree with my opinion. I also won’t take it personally if you argue your opinion, but I’ll still block you if you try to back up your argument by using spoilers.

I won’t really look at comments until after I finish reviewing each season, so while I am technically ignoring people, it’s not personal and it’ll only be for a couple of weeks at a time.

Enjoy. 😄

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Teen Wolf 1x06

Apparently his mom doesn’t do all the grocery shopping anymore.

Also, I’m once again struck on what the actual setting is? Beacon Hills has a Sheriff so it’s gotta be rural, but, like. Most of the houses scream affluent suburb, and a multilevel parking garage for a grocery store screams city.

Honestly, Scott, making all those car alarms go off was very smart, I love it.

So this was some sort of training thing by Fuckface? So he’s a terrible teacher too. Not surprised.

Okay, what the fuck? Scott, the Sheriff getting hurt was not your fault, number one. He barely got bumped, number two. And number three you were there? Like, you’d literally saved Allison from getting hit by a car (which would have been a lot worse for her than the Sheriff) like two seconds earlier. And finally, like, you’re sixteen and the Sheriff is an adult? And there were lots of adults there?

Like, I get feeling guilty and scared, but boy do not take that burden on, I beg of you.

“I don’t even know if I can teach you.” Wow, so for weeks you’ve been holding over Scott’s head that you’re the only one who can teach him and now you like, actually I suck and I was mostly lying and manipulating you. Awesome. Fuckface deserves so many awards for each subsequent level of terribleness that he reaches.

Aaaaaand Fuckface gets another award. Goddamit! What the actual fuck is this guy’s problem?

I don’t even know if I can teach you, but I sure am going to make your life as miserable as possible in the meantime. Fuckface doesn’t just want Scott to not have distractions, he wants Scott to not have a life. Which he’s essentially said before.

Also, Scott’s clearly having money problems, they’ve mentioned it several times, and Fuckface just destroyed his phone for no reason. The more I think I can hate this guy the more he proves me wrong.

THIS MAN IS FULL OF BULLSHIT. HE IS LYING TO YOU. YOU HAVE SHIFTED SEVERAL TIMES WITHOUT ANGER AS THE IMPETUS AND YOU HAVE SHIFTED BACK WITHOUT USING PAIN.

Fuckface is full of anger and pain and he’s trying to make you like him: a tragedy of a barely human soul that only cares about cruelty to others.

“This is the only way that I can teach you,” is very telling. He did not say, this is the only way that you can learn. He’s terrible for you, Scott, and I wish you could/would get away from him.

Lol, if you can teach me, I can stay away from her, is also telling. Because it’s clear Fuckface can’t teach him, so why should he stay away?

Once again, I have to wonder if Kate is supposed to be breadcrumbing Allison or if she’s doing it against her parent’s wishes.

See, that’s the thing when you sneak up on the kid for no reason you’ve now trained him to think it’s you being a Fuckface and not an actual threat.

Funny how the Alpha is just hanging outside the Argent place. You’d think they’d have some sort of protection or warding or traps or something.

Spiral again.

Btw, I’ve just realized that Fuckface has probably caused Scott almost an equal amount of trauma as the Alpha has.

“You can’t ask me to trust you and then keep things to yourself,” is 100% fucking valid, Scott. But you should literally never trust him, he’s been nothing but awful to everyone, but most especially to you.

What the fuck does that even mean? It’s worse than you beating him and hurting him for no reason? It’s worse than the Alpha wanting to kill bond with Scott or just kill Scott in general?

Or is it worse for you, Fuckface? Is it worse because it will make you look even worse in Scott’s eyes than you do right now and cause him not to trust you even more?

Cause I’m feeling like that’s more accurate.

What the fuck is Stiles’ problem?

Oh so this is where Scott is getting the guilt about the Sheriff getting hurt. Well Stiles can fucking suck it. It still wasn’t anywhere in the realm of being Scott’s fault.

At least Stiles and I agree on Fuckface being useless.

Love the loudly talking in the halls about Scott killing people.

Umm, wait. Okay, so, like, Fuckface is bad news, but Stiles has literally never had a good plan. I mean, sometimes they worked, but mostly by accident, and I am scared for them.

I’m thinking back to the first episode when Stiles said something like Scott was dragging him down by his nerdiness. Like, Stiles. Bro. I do not think the nerdiness is all from Scott.

Once again, Stiles strikes me as a cop’s kid and that’s not a compliment. Rich kids and cops kids always, always think the rules don’t apply to them, and it’s anger inducing how often they’re right.

The heart rate thing theoretically makes sense, but I’m incredibly concerned about the duct taped wrists. Why are we not just having him do wind sprints or something?

Why do all of these people conflate anger and pain? They’re not actually the same thing.

Also

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK, STILES? Scott is getting beat up all the time by Derek, he’s being stalked and hurt by the Argents and the Alpha and now he gets to be beat up by you? WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK.

We have already established that while Scott can heal, it still hurts. How many times has he had to deal with physical trauma in the last two months? Fifteen times. Twenty?

He’s averaging once every couple of days. And by people purporting to help him! This cannot be good for his mental health, honestly.

Scott, buddy, that doesn’t make any sense. Allison doesn’t make you weaker, and also, you totally controlled the shift after like a minute, which is way faster than it’s taken you in the past. I absolutely do not condone Stiles beating the fuck out of you with lacrosse balls, but it proved the opposite of what you think it did, my dude.

Not a fan of that hallucination, but the effect was nice.

Sitting kind of close there, bud.

Allison, I love you. Call him out, girl.

“Do you know what it’s like to be the best player on the team?” I mean, she was Nationally ranked as a kid, I think she probably has a good idea about pressure, Jackson, and yet she somehow still manages to not be an asshole.

What’s that quote? When you’re accustomed to privilege, losing it feels like oppression? IT’S NOT.

This is even worse because he’s in a team sport, tbh. Like, this is just showcasing how fucking selfish he is. If he cared at all about the sport or the team he’d be over the moon (no pun intended) about having Scott on the team.

See? Allison and I are of the same mind on this. And no, he wasn’t joking.

He’s bad and also being creepy now. Run, girl.

Poor Allison is having a hard day. Lydia being dismissive, Jackson being creepy, Scott avoiding her.

Scott, seriously, use your words. Tell her that you’re grounded or something. Tell her that your grades are in free fall and you can’t date until they’re sorted. You have options other than just ignoring her.  Even though I don’t think you have to because your assumptions are wrong.

The writers did it again! This time it wasn’t with Stiles, but they had Scott ask a ‘dumb’ question just so someone could be sarcastic back! Such a weird character choice.

Man, this is so mean! Are there any good teachers in this show?

AWWWWWWWW. I mean, absolutely horrible way to show it, but that’s sweet! I knew Allison wasn’t a weakness. Both cause Fuckface is full of shit, but also because this is not the first time he’s calmed down because of her.

Stiles how are you the dumbest smart person? You’re still not forgiven for beating Scott up, though.

Once again, PAIN IS NOT THE SAME AS ANGER AND YOU NEED TO STOP BEATING YOUR FRIEND UP. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? STILES YOU ARE NOT FORGIVEN EVEN A LITTLE.

This actor is not doing well with this scene. Like, he does anger fine, and he did the scene with Kate fine, but I pretty sure this is supposed to be tugging at my heartstrings and all I can think is, like, did you even visit this guy once in six years? Or did you come back now just to show him off to Scott as a physical reminder of your pain, and then yell at him when it’s clear that you’re useless?

Still haven’t ruled that guy out as the Alpha. Don’t know why he killed Laura, but maybe he’s pissed at her for deserting him too.

He didn’t even park in a spot? I mean, just one more asshole behavior, but still. That’s a place where disabled people may need one of those spots you blocked, Fuckface.

Oh. Oh, this is even worse. Stiles did those things to punish Scott for something he had no control over or any responsibility for.

Scott needed to be physically punished TWICE for Stiles to feel better. That’s just…like I don’t want to throw around the word abusive, but this is not a good look at all. Are we supposed to give Stiles a pass because he’s loyal? Because obviously he’s loyal only up until the point where he blames you for something.

I reject that Scott has to do something. Scott is not in charge of protecting the Sheriff or the school or the town. With great power comes great responsibility does not mean all the bad things that happen are his fault. You can’t put that weight on anyone let alone a kid. He’s responsible for helping where he can, just like everyone else, not whenever it’s needed.

Does that teacher know something too?

I still like the Vet. He’s so nice to Scott.

He was better at lying to the Sheriff, but he still wasn’t great at that.

Welp, Fuckface has reached another level of terrible. There could have been a half dozen reasons his heart rate increased, but this guy’s first instinct is always cruelty and violence.

The Vet trying to protect Scott and Scott trying to protect his boss is lovely. I really do like their relationship and I wish we could see more of it. Obviously the Chemistry teacher didn’t know what he was talking about because Scott has a good male role model in the Vet.

The spiral just means revenge? Like, bro, why wouldn’t you just say that to Scott in the first place? YOU MAKE NO SENSE. NONE OF YOUR CHOICES MAKE SENSE.

“Hit him again and you’ll see me get angry.”

Wooooboooooooy, you tell him Scott!

Also, the Vet was clearly knocked out once already and his face didn’t heal and Fuckface is beyond stupid.

Fuckface asking Scott for a plan. Like, I can’t begin to imagine asking a sixteen year old to plan something for me.

“Personally I’m a fan of ignoring a problem until it goes away,” says the guy who got his friend beat up twice because he thinks that just because Scott has these abilities (that he can barely control) he should have protected the Sheriff.

This plan is sounding more like a Stiles plan, Scott. Initial idea with zero idea on follow through.

Dude, Scott got him some base.

Oh, yay, we’re done with Fuckface. Love that for us.

I’m glad the Vet got out of there, but..uh. Boys? We got us a problem.

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Teen Wolf 1x05

Ahhh, my favorite toxic relationship. Tbh I didn’t like the relationship in The Notebook either.

The sports guy’s first instinct not being to run is weird. Hiding isn’t gonna help you, bro.

Focusing on the video covers in the background we’ve got Severance and Let the Right One In. With how heavy handed the symbolism can get in this show I would have expected The Howling or something.

So Fuckface’s scratch did something to Jackson; it looked like it was glowing like the wolfsbane bullet wound. So is Jackson, like, immune to werewolves now? Like he can’t be turned?

Uh, Sheriff, while it’s nice to spend time with your kid, I really feel like this is the opposite of what you should be doing considering Stiles’ complete lack of boundaries, particularly when it comes to your job.

See?

Douchebag’s gonna douche.

Scott, whyyyyyyyy are we hanging around with Fuckface?

“We’re predators not killers,” SAYS THE GUY WHO LITERALLY THREATENED TO MURDER A KID AND VIOLENTLY ATTACKED HIM SEVERAL TIMES.

Like, you couldn’t have fucking started with that, Derek?! You couldn’t have fucking started off with I’m really sorry this is happening to you, this is not how this is supposed to work and I’m sorry you got caught up in it, but I can help you and I think you can help me make this better.

Also, ALSO, Fuckface starts with “Starting to get it,” like Scott’s slow or something for not getting what’s happening, but when Scott says no and asks legitimate questions, Fuckface is all, yeah, I don’t know either we’ll have to figure that out together. Like, BRO. YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU’RE DOING AND ARE DEPENDING ON THE CHILD WITHOUT ACTUALLY GIVING HIM ANYTHING TO WORK WITH.

And AND, why didn’t the Alpha try to ‘call’ Scott to help him murder this guy? I thought that was one of the things Fuckface was supposed to help with, but the way this is framed, Scott never actually got the ‘call’ and Fuckface is still useless.

So we got spirals on Laura’s grave, Fuckface has a spiral tattoo, and now we got a spiral on the roof. Don’t remember one with the bus driver, but maybe I missed it. Is it like a family crest thing? A secret werewolf thing?

“You want to do homework or do you want to not die?” THOSE ARE NOT THE ONLY TWO OPTIONS FUCKFACE.

If Scott doesn’t kill with him then the Alpha is going to kill Scott. He said that last episode too. But, uh…the Alpha killed the clerk and Scott clearly wasn’t ‘called’ to help him. They didn’t show up until the police were there for crying out loud. So he wasn’t called and he didn’t need protection, so I’m still lost as to why Scott needs Fuckface at all.

The implication is that Scott needs to join the pack before the next full moon, but that doesn’t make any sense. Like, why would it be the second full moon after he was turned, not the first one?

And even if that is the truth (which, since I don’t trust Fuckface at all, is in doubt), like, what’s the fucking plan, Derek? Why exactly does Scott need to be actively involved with the search? Why can’t he just call you (or even better, the Argents because you’re fucking useless) and be like, ‘Yo, you may want to head down to the Pawn Shop on 5th, I think the Alpha’s there.’ 

Also, it’s not like any of these murders are happening during the day, Fuckface. There’s no reason why he still can’t live his life.

You know what I super love? That when Scott asks legitimate questions because Fuckface has explained absolutely nothing, Fuckface then answers him in the most condescending way possible. Stellar. Love that.

Okay, so. Fuckface needs to be murdered. Like, not even joking. This piece of dogshit is once again assaulting a child to show him that the only thing in his future is pain.

Even though we’ve seen that’s not true! We’ve seen Scott change back several times without it! Stiles startled him with the fire extinguisher, which okay, may cause skin irritation, but it’s way more likely surprise that did it. He changed back within minutes after the game with no pain required, just some heavy breathing and Allison talking to him! In the last fucking episode, he consciously changed just his nails to claws and back again without needing pain either way! In the fight with Fuckface he didn’t change into the wolf because of anger, he changed only after Fuckface threw him down the stairs, and then they had a whole fight where he was thrown around and never changed back until Fuckface stopped hitting him!

FUCKFACE IS A LYING LIAR WHO LIES AND IS MANIPULATING YOU SCOTT. HE IS TRYING TO CHANGE YOU INTO A MONSTER JUST LIKE THE ALPHA IS.

Pain doesn’t keep you human, Derek. It’s just pain. And I’m going to circle back to the lycanthropy as chronic illness analogy. People with chronic pain aren’t better or more noble or an inspiration. They’re just people. Some have more support than others, some have found better ways for themselves to cope with the pain, but they aren’t any more or less human for their suffering.

It makes me go back to what he said at the beginning that the bite was a gift. How could he possibly think it’s a gift if it relies so completely on pain? How fucking twisted is that? Make it make sense.

Oooh, I wonder if Auntie Kate had permission from Papa Argent to give her that little breadcrumb.

And we have received confirmation that she is older. Also, Scott, I love you, you’re sweet. I like how he takes these things that Allison thinks of as failings in herself and gives her compassion and understanding without minimizing her feelings.

Oh. Yay. A teacher who is the worst.

Okay, was that weird for anyone else? Like, does he actually have a heart or was it just because it was Jackson and the teacher has favorites?

Real or hallucination? Neither. Okay.

What the fuck was that even about? How did that help at all? Like, if he just wanted to make sure Jackson kept his mouth shut, then he should have listened in on his statement to the cops, it wouldn’t have been hard to do. Threatening him is just…mean if he already said he didn’t see anything to the cops and wasn’t pursuing any sort of investigation.

Fuckface is always just randomly mean for no fucking reason.

Uh, Stiles, why does Scott have to do something about it? This is not actually Scott’s problem. Why should he care about Lydia or Jackson, and also, what exactly do you expect him to do about the dead body?

Stiles stop being creepy about this.

STILES DON’T BE CREEPY ABOUT THIS!

The lack of boundaries on this kid. Like, I get we’re supposed to think it’s good that he saw that video, but honestly that was nothing. You’d have to know what you were looking at to see anything.

You know, for a guy who’s stalkery with everyone and has never been surprised at his house, it’s a little weird that the hunters just walk up and he never hears them coming until they are basically already inside. I’d say they were using some huntery trick, but Kate very clearly wants to be balls out on this.

Also, I wonder what the hierarchy is with the hunters. It’s implied that these guys report to Chris, but they’ll also just as easily follow Kate. Neither she nor Chris seem to be in charge of the other. All of the henchmen have been men too. Kate’s the only female hunter we’ve seen. Mrs. Argent is obviously in the know, but not a hunter. I wonder what that means for Allison.

The Alpha and Fuckface want to remake Scott in their image, and Kate wants to make Allison in her own.

I AM CONFUSION! How long before she was found did Laura die then? Also, the Sheriff thinks she was killed by animals so the implication was that the alpha killed her, but now Kate saying hunters did it. Is she lying or what?

Fuckface you are so stupid. Three against one and you don’t leave, or separate them and take them out one at a time, or have any sort of tactics to use against someone who already shot you. You growl loudly and posture and immediately get taken out.

Okay, so Kate knows Fuckface from before and is also gross. Good to know.

I don’t understand why Stiles is having this crisis and needs Scott. Get the video from Lydia’s phone just in case you need it and delete the evidence. I know that Stiles isn’t really good at the planning part of things, but that doesn’t seem hard.

Scott & Allison are super cute together.

Okay, I guess that had a better shot of the Alpha than I thought. But I still don’t understand the big deal? Like, why was the such a monumental choice?

Ah, so that answers that question. Hunters didn’t kill her but they did sever her. But, like, why? Fuckface didn’t seem to be particularly hiding out, and Chris cornered him at a gas station pretty quickly. It seems both overkill and also really stupid, since that brought a lot more notoriety to the body than just an animal attack.

Also, that means that Scott would have never been out in the woods to get bitten by the Alpha if they hadn’t done that. 

You know what, Kate, I don’t like you. But I agree with you that Fuckface is useless. Too bad you got cocky and missed.

I feel like that was supposed to give me some sort of sympathy for Fuckface, but it really didn’t. He’s been terrible to literally everyone the entire time, just because someone was being terrible to him doesn’t make me sympathetic to him.

Man, Scott’s boss is either awesome, or he really cares for Scott, or both. Like, how many bosses would make a phone call like that?

Why are the dogs losing their minds in the background?

Why do I feel like the Vet actually knows more than he’s saying?

Funny how Jackson’s ‘need to please’ has never manifested itself in being a nice person.

Is Stiles’ mom dead or are they divorced? A lot of divorced couples in this show.

So we get the asshole teacher for both Jackson and Scott, who clearly has a hard on for Jackson and doesn’t particularly care for Scott. We have a random teacher, who’s clearly the most put together, talk about Lydia and Allison, and we have the goofy teacher talk about Stiles.

Jackson is shown self destructing, Lydia is shown putting herself back together, and Stiles is shown hyper fixating.

It’s funny because the paper Scott got back said something like, “this isn’t like you,” and the Chemistry teacher says that Scott’s grades and attendance have only be an issue lately (obviously due to werewolf shenanigans) but somehow he’s trying to blame it on Scott’s home situation. I wonder how recently Scott’s parents split.

Lol, the fur coat on Mrs. Argent, are you kidding me?

Man, Mrs. McCall is getting hit with all the dudes being assholes about her parenting today.

Look at Scott using his werewolf eyes on command!

So did the Alpha set the cougar loose at the school to cover up the attacks or did Kate? I honestly wouldn’t put it past her.

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Teen Wolf 1x04

Well, the Alpha (who I’m still guessing is a lost Hale relative) is after her so she’s going to be like bus driver guy, except live because she’s a high enough paid actor that I recognize her face.

Well she’s definitely better prepared than bus driver guy. Another hunter?

So did Scott hear the gunshot because it was near his house or because it was near the Alpha?

Well that answers the hunter question.

Still don’t like the wolf CGI.

But now we have Fuckface and two Argents after the same thing. With luck they’ll all kill each other.

Oh man, Derek. That looks bad. If only you hadn’t been such a fuckface maybe someone would help you with your little problem. Who are we kidding though, Scott’s going to get dragged into this like he has with every single one of Fuckface’s problems. Probably get yelled at and/or attacked for no reason too.

So this episode is very much confirming that Allison knows nothing about the family business. Waiting until she’s older maybe? I wonder if that explains the gymnastics as a kid too, since Auntie Kate also has some moves.

Grades and supernatural shenanigans never seem to go well together. Lord knows Buffy had some hard times. But, like, between school, lacrosse, a job, dating, and shenanigans I can’t imagine he’s got a lot of free time. Or gets a lot of sleep, honestly.

Fuckface vs Douchebag. Fight! Fight! Fight!

Fuckin same, Stiles! Why do we even have this guy?

WHY SHOULD I HELP YOU IS A GOOD FUCKING QUESTION, SCOTT. And I still firmly believe there have to be other werewolves you can find somewhere. Maybe some of them will not actually be assholes.

I’m gonna be honest with you. Like the little kid in The Princess Bride, I’m skipping the kissing part.

Stiles face is a mood every time I see Fuckface.

You should drive him to the Hale house and dump him in the yard.

The green screen behind them is distracting. It keeps switching from suburbs to forest.

Have I mentioned how much I hate Fuckface lately? Because I still do. Literally every interaction with him involves manipulation or violence or is creepy.

Okay, so Kate was definitely involved in the Hale fire.

Still up in the air on whether it was justified. The Argents are a bit too trigger happy, but all evidence points to the Hales being violent, murderous assholes, so…

Is she going to like show him a gymnastics routine?

Ha! Lol. Okay, so first, that tracks with the trigger happy family, but second they were definitely training her in the family business on the sly.

The sign said they’re an international company. I wonder how big the family is and if they’re all hunters?

I still haven’t forgiven Chris for how shooty he was with Scott. But he does make me laugh.

The classical elevator music in the background is really selling this dinner scene. Interesting that they are the only married couple we’ve seen, though Mrs. Argent doesn’t seem to be much of a talker. 

“I’m starting to think that wouldn’t be such a bad thing.” Starting to think? Starting to think? Scott, please remember this man has been nothing but a manipulative, creepy, violent threat to you and to people you care about. He has literally only helped you with one thing that you probably could have worked out yourself given enough time. You and Stiles don’t owe this guy shit.

What exactly is Fuckface going to do the next time? He certainly didn’t do anything the first time. Scott got called out against his will and still tried to help the bus driver. Fuckface did nothing; he is manipulating you!

Scott, you are both nicer and braver than I for sneaking through Kate’s things. And, oh, she’s gonna notice if you swipe that.

You should have taken a picture and looked it up later. Oh…wait…could his phone even take a picture or is this show set too early for that?

Okay, so the vibe I got from the rabid dog story is that Chris believes what he’s doing is right (as previously said, a good trait in a villain). He thinks that werewolves can’t be good and can’t be saved. That no matter how gentle they were, they will always give into the bite and he can feel pity for them because of that, but won’t hesitate to put them down.

Back to Kafka, Chris thinks once you have been transformed into a monster you can never be anything else.

I do not get that at all from Kate. Honest to god, I think she just likes killing things and doesn’t need much of a reason.

Both can be scary in their own way.

Also, grandfather is clearly also in on the family business.

Poor Scott didn’t get a lot of studying done.

Scott’s parents divorce is confirmed.

Allison is so great. Like, she totally goes after what she wants all of the time. I mean, it sucks for Scott at this particular moment, because she’s not going to have to bear the wrath of her dad, but still. I like that she stands up for herself and Scott.

Scott’s getting better at lying. He used to be really bad, but he actually looked like he had no idea what Kate was talking about. Now Allison definitely looked like she knew what Kate was talking about.

AHAHAHAHA! Allison you slay me.

Stiles, just, like, accidentally slip and shove it through his chest. It’ll be fine. Scott’s help you hide the body and no one will miss him.

Awww, look at Scott being so good under pressure and doing the exacting, delicate thing that needs to be done to save someone who’s been only cruel to him, absolutely flying in the face of everything Chris believes.

You know what, Fuckface deserves more than a punch but I’ll take what I can get.

Well, Scott, Chris would probably shoot you a little, and yet you are still right in that they’re a lot fricken nicer than Fuckface is.

Six years ago and not ten, which is a fairly significant change. Fuckface and Laura at school, so like maybe away at college? Eleven people trapped inside and Peter as the only survivor, which either means an extended family member out for revenge or Peter’s faking it. Or someone else got away and hid from Laura and Fuckface.

Also, the look Fuckface gets when Scott says the Argents had a reason to start the fire is so funny. Like bro, my buddy, my pal, you absolute shitstain of a human being, do you actually think you have represented your family (or werewolves in general) well? All the werewolves he knows have attacked and threatened him and others, murdered people, manipulated him and tried to force him into becoming a murderer like them. Of fucking course he thinks there was probably a reason.

All that he knows about the Argents is that they shot him while probably aiming for you, are weirdly intense, and raised a great daughter who is nice and kind and stands up for him.

“It’s what Allison will do,” insists the lying liar who lies with zero proof of that.

Okay, yup, Auntie Kate is the rogue and Chris can (theoretically) be reasoned with. He’d probably still break your window though. Possibly shoot you non fatally.

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Teen Wolf 1x03

Scott, baby child. There is no allure to a school bus.

Oh well this is definitely a nightmare. Choice of school bus is fair then.

It’s a little weird that we didn’t get to see Scott waking up panicked and not breathing, and instead are getting told about it when he’s already calmed down.

Now that I think about it, we haven’t spent a lot of time alone with Scott while he’s going through the trauma of shifting without wanting it. We really only had that one quick scene in the shower before he got cut off with him being concerned with someone else. Like, historically werewolf transformation scenes in cinema usually last for several minutes, but I went back and looked, and the scene we got with Scott in the shower was 21 seconds. Is that weird to anyone else?

Like, I’m not looking for trauma porn, but we spend more time with Scott trying to calmly work the problem or him panicking in the moment, and rarely get that visceral hit of, ‘there’s this thing happening to my body that I can’t control or stop.’ Which, I guess maybe comes from the fact that he is asthmatic and maybe used to that feeling? I wish that could have been explored a bit more.

But I guess, I’m also feeling like there’s a missed opportunity to explore the whole, this thing was doneto me past tense, but because of the trauma it is also continuing to happen to me and I can’t stop it. Like, he gets triggered and has both a physical and emotional response, but it’s not a flashback to his initial traumatic event, it’s actively happening again.

It’s being presented as a weird combination of traumatic violent attack and a sudden onset of chronic illness, but it’s not being explored that way at all. It’s being explored as a procedural. So weird.

Oh no, Scott! I agree with Stiles on this! Derek violently attacked you multiple times and threatened to kill you! Like, I get he’s the only other werewolf you know of but he’s a creepy, violent, shitbag whose behavior should not be modeled in any way!

Well I get the concern, but Fuckface still doesn’t seem to give a shit about violence, only about getting caught so I’m still not sure he’s going to be in any way helpful, and he’s more likely to be detrimental to your life.

Panicked boy hits a locker, feels ashamed about it and literally no one notices. Just your average day in high school, I guess.

Allison ruffling Scott’s hair was cute. 

Ahahaha! It’s Jackson’s locker! No wonder no one gave a shit.

Scott’s face!

This is the second time we’ve gotten an exchange where Stiles says something and Scott asks a clarifying question that Stiles think is stupid so he sarcastically snipes back at him.

And, like, I maybe I’m misremembering, but Scott doesn’t do that with anyone else, so it just makes it seem like the writer’s are specifically putting that in so Stiles can have the snappy rejoinder. Which…is a choice to make your lead character ask a dumb question just because you want to write snarky dialogue. I get it, it’s fun, but it’s not great writing.

I’m going to have to watch out for the writers using Stiles as a proxy. It also puts a spin on how much of an asshole he was in the first episode.

Quick question: where did the third friend from the first episode go? She was cute.

We’re, what, fifteen minutes later before they found the victim? That’s just bad work by their emergency services department.

I mean, Scott has a point. The first time he went after someone was Stiles in the locker room and he didn’t remember any of it. He’s also definitely sleepwalked before, so it stands to reason that he’d be freaked about this. Still think Fuckface is a bad call.

Last episode Scott tries multiple times to not play and gets (gently or not so gently) bullied into it by multiple people. This episode he tries to cancel with Allison and in the reverse of episode one, Stiles tries to convince him otherwise.

Back when he lived with his dad? That makes it sound like for a while he was living with just his dad. I wonder if there was some sort of custody battle and he went from living with dad to living with mom.

Why do any of these people hang around Jackson? He seems so tiresome.

Also, Scott, there’s a fine line between being proactive and shooting yourself in the foot. Stop shooting yourself in the foot!

Lol, Stiles asking Scott if he’s attractive to gay guys and the Coach in the last episode asking if it was boy problems implies that Scott is bi. I wonder if they’re actually going to do something with that. 

Also, which one’s Danny, they keep mentioning him. Hold on, let me look him up.

Oh, yeah. He’s cute. Also seems much older than the others.

I know he’s in a hurry, but he didn’t even lock his bike up!

Aww, I like the Vet.

The way that the Sheriff stepped into the doorway was 1000% Linden Ashby channeling Johnny Cage from Mortal Combat.

Lol, Scott trying to bribe his mom with dinner. Though why can’t he borrow Stiles’ Jeep?

While I understand why they had one parent work at the hospital and the other at the police department, it does lend itself to making it seem more like a procedural.

Bad security at this hospital. This is the second time Scott’s been in places he shouldn’t be.

Well that doesn’t bode well, but the guy freaked out at nothing before as well so I can’t read too much into it. Are we voting Fuckface as the attacker or our mysterious third werewolf? Arguments could be made for both.

Wait, hold up. Why his eyes blue? Is it just because his normal eyes are blue and Scott’s are normally brown or is it something else?

Poor puppy. Gotta be a cop dog and also have to deal with Fuckface? Bad life all around.

Uh, wait, no. You didn’t do shit to him, Scott. HE announced YOU to the hunters. HE was violent and skeevy and threatening to YOU, which was why you got him arrested. Like, I understand soft selling because you want his help, but please do not be believing the words you are saying.

Aaaand, I still hate this guy who continues to give no help and actively make Scott’s life worse. Let’s flashback to Kafka again with the whole being treated as monstrous leading someone to become a monster. Like, is that what Fuckface is trying for here? The total corruption of Scott?

DO NOT TRUST HIM. TERRIBLE IDEA. FUCKFACE IS BAD NEWS.

I understand Scott feels trapped between a rock and a hard place, but like, he doesn’t even know if he actually did anything yet. The not knowing is scary, but I feel like you can wait to find the answer. Put a camera in your room while you sleep to make sure you don’t go anywhere. There are options! 

Yeah, I don’t buy that. Obviously Scott wants to know if he’ll hurt Allison, but Fuckface is either blind, stupid or trying to manipulate Scott by saying he doesn’t care about that guy. Scott’s so clearly incredibly compassionate, we’ve both seen it multiple times and heard it from other characters. Don’t let Fuckface manipulate you into being someone you’re not.

Also, walk the scene of the crime is something he could have thought of himself and Fuckface is useless. And, like, not even a villain anymore. At least when he was attacking Scott he was proactive, but ever since he was arrested he’s been very reactive and I don’t like the change.

“Why am I always the guy keeping watch?” Says the guy who’s never been shown as the guy keeping watch.

Okay, the “oh my god,” line reading was pretty funny, but, like, your buddy thinks he murdered someone, maybe now isn’t the time to trivialize things.

Yes, please get your fingerprints all over everything.

Ah, the one time we had someone keeping watch is the one time we needed it. Convenient.

Oh, well, okay, your blood is already all over everything so I guess prints don’t matter.

So we’re thinking mysterious third werewolf, right? And Fuckface is looking for him and for some reason needs Scott’s help to find him?

Theory: Mysterious werewolf killed Laura, turned Scott and now Fuckface wants revenge and is using Scott to find him or lure him or something.

Wow, if that’s the case Fuckface is stupid as fuck. Like seriously, seriously dumb. It would have been so goddamn easy to earn Scott’s trust and get on his good side AND you could have been helping him while he was helping you, but instead you chose to be creepy and violent and manipulative and murderous. To a kid.

Ugh, okay, focus. Scott is not a murderer, and everyone’s happy.

Okay, look. At least half the time Scott is fucking with Stiles when he goes completely deadpan, right? Because his face sometimes twitches like he’s trying not to laugh at how affronted Stiles is, and it tickles me.

Lol at Lydia being all flirty with the dad. Points to the dad for not reacting at all. We need more of that in teen shows. I mean, we still don’t like the dad for shoot first ask questions later, but he gets points for that.

Oooh, Allison has moves. I love that for her. The fact that the hat stayed on kills me though.

Why would the bowling alley let them in if there was a curfew? Not very responsible.

Ugh, I hate Jackson. You’d think if he was sooooo competitive about bowling he’d not be hanging on Lydia like that.

I appreciate Allison standing up for Scott.

Oh boy, two people I don’t like or care about facing off against each other. Whosoever shall I root for?

It’s always a little bit funny to see someone doing something ordinary, but trying to be menacing about it.

So, we’ve established that Argent knows about Fuckface and his family, but we still don’t know exactly what pulled Argent to Beacon Hills. You have to wonder if Argent knows what happened with the fire (was involved with the fire?) that killed the rest of the Hales. If they were all like Fuckface I can only imagine that they had a lot of enemies though.

The gas station attendant watching this whole confrontation from inside with chips in one hand and a phone in the other with 911 already dialed.

Why is Lydia like this? I mean I don’t care about Jackson’s feelings, but doing this right in front of Allison is extraordinarily bad behavior. Scott and Allison should just leave, honestly.

Lol at Scott being like, yeah, no, I’m good here.

She sucks for his benefit, but also can’t stop antagonizing him. Ugly, toxic relationship. Is this just to contrast to how sweet Allison and Scott are in comparison or are we going to eventually see some depth in these other characters? Because I’m already at the point where I don’t even see why Allison is friends with them.

Scott has like five antagonists in this show. This kid needs a break.

Okay, so mysterious werewolf is another Hale, right? Except, hold up. Why would another Hale kill Laura? And why would they not contact Fuckface? I mean, I know I wouldn’t want to deal with him, but still.

This only contributes to my theory that all the Hales are terrible.

Yeah, sure, kill the dude. That tracks as a Hale thing to do.

I think it’s adorable that he said ‘hang out again’. Like, he was so despairing at the beginning because that was a friend phrase and not a romantic one, but he’s willing to meet her where she’s at, and she’s the one who says date and asks it to be just the two of them.

Doesn’t she have to sneak back in again because of curfew?

“Do either of you even play baseball?!” Funny, but bro, you gotta stop breaking into their house. This kid lacks all the personal boundaries and that would drive me insane.

Fuckface once again being the worst. I just can’t get over how violent he’s being to a kid. Like he’s a kid, and he hasn’t done anything wrong!

Fuckface deserved that, but kick him in the balls next time too.

I would like to remind everyone that this is an adult man fighting with a child because a) he’s a murderous villain or b) he can’t use his words so is choosing violence against a child.

So it’s option B and Fuckface is not only criminally violent but also the stupidest person alive. Got it.

Derek, this literally could have been a conversation over a cup of coffee, but you made this into three weeks of hell for this kid for no fucking reason.

Oh. Great. Alphas and betas. Yeah, this is totally not going to go to a stupid, fake, wolf pack hierarchy place.

On a brief production note, I’ve hated the way they’ve done the majority of these flashbacks.

Scott, the enemy of the enemy is not your friend. Don’t forget he’s a fuckface and cannot be trusted.

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Teen Wolf 1x02

Aaaand we start off with shirtless boy again.

Out of curiosity, why is Stiles not freaked out about Scott playing lacrosse, which would also raise his heart rate? Is it specifically a night of the full moon thing?

Well clearly it’s not just a full moon thing.

So the first time his eyes change it’s to comfort the dog. The second time is because he’s afraid for Allison. It’s the third eye change and now it’s about anger. But even when it’s about anger, he was already feeling a lot of emotions because of Mr. Argent.

It’s just interesting to me that they waited so long to show us Scott’s anger making him shift when it was like the first thing Stiles mentioned when he finally decided Scott was a werewolf. He’s a teenage boy under a lot of pressure, but it’s been at least a week.

I guess technically he clawed up Stiles’ chair, but even then his eyes didn’t change. I don’t know why I find his eyes a more significant part of the change than anything else, but I do. Maybe because that’s how he’s literally seeing the world.

Oh great. Derek McFuckface being both useless and creepy.

Huh, so, like, was it like a rage blackout? Why didn’t he remember this time when he remembered what happened with fuckstick in the woods?

Oh man, this poor kid. He just wanted to play. That was like the first thing we learned about him. Instead he gets all that trauma from the attack, from his first transformation, from Derek & the hunters. And now the one thing he wanted is getting taken away too.

Hey, is his mom actually a doctor/nurse? Maybe he did have all that bandage stuff at home.

So they have money problems, and it’s not just Scott working for extra cash. Pretty nice house for having money problems, but honestly compared to the other houses we’ve seen it’s basically a shack.

I wonder how long he’s been working at the vet? Probably a while, right if they’ve let him be there by himself.

Wait, did we ever figure out how old these kids were supposed to be? Jackson and Allison seem older than Scott, Stiles, and Lydia, but Allison is in Scott’s class, so maybe her schooling is all messed up because they moved around so much?

Lol, oh my god, Scott. This scene between him and his mother is hilarious. Also, where’s his dad? I assume he’s not in the picture.

Oh goody, violent stalker Derek is back. Is it just violence this time or violence and manipulation? Or maybe you’re going to say he should be grateful again, you dogshit excuse for a person.

Even better! Threats of murder! This guy is the absolute worst. Hey, let’s violently attack this kid and turn him into a nightmare monster with no support or instruction, then attack him again for no reason and show him how people are hunting him by getting him shot, and then try to like trauma bond with him and tell him he should be grateful about it, and then threaten to kill him after you’ve given him absolutely nothing but abuse?!?!?! 

Umm, like, perhaps this ginormous waste of space should be hunted down like a feral animal.

The first time Scott tries to get away without explaining anything it works, but it’s definitely not working for him this episode. Fake an injury, kid. Not sure how he’d do that with his mom being some sort of medical person, but he could give it a shot.

Okay, so who the fuck is that? If it was creepy Derek they would have shown him, so it’s gotta be another werewolf. Who is also creepy.

Fellas, are all the werewolves but Scott going to be evil in this? Maybe we’re going back to Kafka and the whole being treated as monstrous leads you into becoming a monster and Scott with his sweet heart and slowness to anger having to fight against that. Which is a little bit heartbreaking.

On the one hand, Scott was being weird and intense. On the other, I’d’ve been a little weirded out about the whole Derek thing if I were her. Because she only went with him because he said he was Scott’s friend but now Scott’s saying that’s not true and if she thought about it for a hot second she’d probably remember she was wearing the jacket in Derek’s car.

Lol, okay, so Scott can be impulsive too, I guess. Sure, go straight toward the guy who threatened to kill you because he also might be a threat to Allison.

“You don’t get it, but I’m looking out for you,” says the guy who literally threatened to murder him the day before.

Also, he’s not fucking looking out for Scott, he’s looking out for himself. “If they find out about you, they find out about me,” is exactly what he said. He doesn’t give a shit about Scott.

It’s clear he’s been stalking more than just Scott too.

This bitch. I cannot tell you how much I loathe this guy. On the plus side, it’s clear that Smugface Shitboy thinks he’s in the right, and that’s always the best kind of villain.

I do like how proactive Scott is being about this. Like, he’s working the problem. Maybe not elegantly- or even effectively at this moment - but he’s not letting his trauma or fear stop him from trying to live his life.

So Morgue was not my first thought here. What the hell, kid.

Stiles is being way less creepy this episode. Also, way less mean to Scott. I am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

I have big feelings about athletes pushing themselves through injury, specifically high school and college athletes doing that, so Lydia is officially on my shit list.

The scent was the same?! I shall not call bullshit because this is a supernatural show, but with all the scents in a hospital morgue and how new he is at this it’s a little suspect.

Also, not to give Fuckface any credit, but burying the body doesn’t make him a murderer, he could just be creepy. I mean, I get where Scott’s coming from with the whole dead body plus he literally threatened to murder Scott so I wouldn’t put it past him, I’m just saying it’s not conclusive. This doesn’t mean they shouldn’t throw the law at him though. Maybe the cops can actually be useful for something.

You know what? I like that they clarified that Scott isn’t just doing this because of the game. Like, even without that him throwing the cops at Derek is totally justified, but Scott’s not going along with Stiles being giddy about body parts anymore, she’s officially become a person in his eyes who was violently attacked just like he was.

Bad call, boys, you’re disturbing evidence.

Scott, I’m sorry, you were expecting Stiles to actually have a good plan? That doesn’t seem like him at all.

Lol, I was going to laugh at the incongruity of one single, perfect flower, but I guess it was like that on purpose.

Scott looks sad when they’re taking Fuckface out in cuffs. Again, it just hammers home that she wasn’t just body parts, she was a person and now he knows that she was a werewolf like him. Like, was she stalked and threatened by Fuckface too? Was she traumatized and afraid for her life like Scott has been? Was she trying to protect people too?

Oh, man. Poor impulse control Stiles strikes again. And Scott’s freaking out because he knows Fuckface has been stalking Stiles already.

Okay, so once again, Fuckface doesn’t really seem to care that Scott might hurt someone, or even that Scott might get hurt, he only cares about their secret getting out. Maybe this is some sort of weird game he and the other werewolf play: one of them violently turns someone, the other toys with the victim and manipulates them, and then they kill them together before their secret can be revealed, each of them getting a piece.

See, the problem with Stiles is that half the time his dipshit plans work out so he gets overconfident and comes up with more dipshit plans.

Uh, something is wrong here. Why does Scott look like he’s fighting off sleep?

Oh, okay, he’s fighting off wolfsbane poisoning maybe? That took a while actually. One presumes Stiles had it with them the whole time he drove Scott home the night before, then picked him up the next day and is now driving him back again.

Oh that’s not good.

Scott? What are you doing, buddy?

Obligatory frightened by his own reflection scene.

Scott! Perfect opportunity to pretend injury and not play in the game! Use this!

Ugh! Terrible wasted opportunity. He’s not any better than Stiles at thinking on his feet. Does usually plan better though.

Lol at him apologizing for getting run over.

Oh, poor baby. It’s like he traded one chronic illness for another, and he’s used to having to accommodate for asthma, but lycanthropy comes with a whole new set of accommodations that’s he’s got to learn because it’s also life or death.

Stiles, bud. Not helping. Negative helping.

So Lydia will manipulate and threaten Scott to win, but when he scores she’s all begrudging about clapping? That seems off. Like, she clapped when Scott was awesome during trying outs to tweak Jackson’s competitiveness, but not during a game they were losing? Inconsistent characterization right there.

Allison just walking into the locker room like nbd. And then walking into the showers.

Boy you just calmed yourself down!

Stiles, stop being creepy. But he is trying to be a good bro.

Laura Hale neatly severed. Yeah, it’s totally an animal attack. It being his sister actually makes Fuckface look more creepy somehow.

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN. The holes in the gloves would have had more impact if Stiles hadn’t bitten through the tips of his own gloves like three times in that game.

Fuckface has spotted another victim! This one’s as much of a douche as him!

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Teen Wolf 1x01

Starting with cops. Not auspicious. ACAB.

Pretty house.

Obligatory shirtless dude.

Gross, dude, clean your sink.

He got dressed really fast. Multiple layers and shoes and everything.

Cop’s kid is a douche. People who come to my house when it’s not an emergency just because I didn’t answer my phone can get fucked, number one. Number two, he’s so fucking perky about it being half a body. Like, she’s not even a person to him. Which, I guess tracks since he’s a cop’s kid.

Wow, cop’s kid is like a super douche. He’s put the other kid down like three times in less than a minute. Why is red hoodie kid (real subtle with the imagery on that one) even friends with this guy? More importantly, why is he going along with all of this? Teenage boys are weird.

Lol, red hoodie guy asking the pertinent questions while douchebag’s like, huh, didn’t think of that. Why am I getting the impression that red hoodie guy is the brains behind this whole thing?

Oh, man, okay, severe asthmatic trying out for lacrosse does seem to be a pie in the sky dream, but cop’s kid was still a dick about it.

Also, as someone with both a severe asthmatic friend in high school, and someone who hangs around a lot with physically disabled people as an adult, cop’s kid is still being a dick. Fucker didn’t even slow down when his friend started wheezing, the absolute shitstain. Like, dude, that shit’s deadly.

Fucking hell, and then he starts running?! Oh boy, this kid is selfish with a severe lack of impulse control. I may actually hate him. Some of the worst kind of people to be around, tbh.

Red hoodie kid is the enabler who’s about to kill himself from an asthma attack. Not smart, red hoodie kid. You are better off without him.

Oof, second not smart move by Scott. Clearly the Sheriff has no control over his kid the punishment is going to amount to a lecture and do absolutely nothing to change his kid’s behavior (typical). Scott would have been better off getting a lecture and escort back to the car.

Now he’s soaking wet in the woods, where he doesn’t want to be, fresh off of an asthma attack, with no guarantee that cop’s kid will even wait for him the selfish fuck.

And now he’s lost his inhaler. Oh boy. 

And now he’s found a body. This just keeps going from bad to worse. Man, I really feel for him, as I too was the kid who got dragged into things and often had harsher consequences than the people who dragged me into them.

Shit, did he lose his phone too?

And there would be the wolf. And the bite. And red hoodie guy is the teen wolf, lol.

Okay, so Scott bikes to school. Which means his asthma might be more managed than I thought. Probably the attack the night before was due to the cold and the fear.

And we have another douchebag. Oh goodie.

Okay, but, like, nothing about cop’s kid trying to go back and find him? Nothing like an apology? Just, like, implying he’s either lying or stupid about the wolf and then getting weirdly excited about the dead body again?

THIS KID IS TERRIBLE SCOTT, WHY DO YOU HANG OUT WITH HIM?

As an aside, that’s a pretty comprehensive bandage. Like, do most parents stock large gauze pads and medical tape? I mean, my mom did, but she’s a nurse. I know for certain my dad didn’t.

So, like, quick question: is cop’s kid just borderline gross about all women?

Because on its own, his sort of but not quite catcall of Lydia is mostly fine. But…uh, they fucking linked Lydia to the dead woman’s body through the dialogue and the kid got super giddy about half the body and now all I can think of is that cop’s kid is into necrophilia and is imagining Lydia in the place of the random women. Like, wtf is going on here? Why are we characterizing this kid like this? Is he going to be a future villain because he’s giving me all sorts of bad vibes.

Did kids still pass physical notes in the 2010s? I feel like it all would have been texting by then. 

Lol. Kafka Metamorphosis. Oh boy.

So, Scott is going to see himself as monstrous and is going to struggle with his change and his humanity. Understandable.

But, like, Metamorphosis can easily be used as an allegory for the breadwinner of the family going through a catastrophic illness - either mental or physical - and becoming a burden to their family and eventually being cast aside.

It can also easily be read as someone who is treated as monstrous begins to believe that they are monstrous and thus becomes a monster.

I wonder if the show is actually going to explore either of these themes or was this just used as MTV shorthand.

Allison is very pretty and very tall. Also, new girl feels. I moved twelve times by the times I was twelve and hated it.

Scott, bro, you are not smooth. But you are cute, so you’re forgiven.

“Beautiful people herd together,” says cop’s kid to a gorgeous girl implying that she is not gorgeous. Why is he like this?

Douchebag Captain is still a douche. And Lydia’s 100% Cordelia Chase. Like, that conversation was so close to the initial conversation between Buffy and Cordelia it’s ridiculous.

Cop’s kid still being selfish, I see.

Also, interesting that Scott said he’s tired of sitting on the sidelines when it’s only two scenes after the Kafka thing. Because Gregor’s whole deal was being passive: things kept happening to him instead of him making things happen. If Scott is being the opposite of Gregor here, I wonder if instead of the being treated as a burden and cast aside this is going to go more with the original Teen Wolf story and he’s going to be the town hero somehow? Though with probably more of a Buffy vibe.

I know they’re showing that he can’t control it with him listening in on all of these conversations, but, like, I’m just imagining the first sense being smell and it’s hilarious.

The music choice is killing me right now.

Also, is lacrosse like hockey in that the ball needs to go across the goal line to count? Because, like, he took it in the face but it didn’t look like it crossed the line. Hockey goalies get hit in the face all the time and it’s totally normal.

Okay, cop’s kid got points back for cheering for Scott, but then immediately lost them because he instantly tried to ride his coattails. Ugh. This kid is terrible.

Captain douchecanoe doesn’t look at his Coach, just looks straight to his girlfriend. Like, bro, is her dick-game that good?

Ha! There is a smell thing. You’d think that would have kicked in when he was in the locker room.

Once again cop’s kid is being a dick.

If that is the right spot, I’m seriously impressed with Scott being able to find it again. There was a lot of fumbling and turning around in the dark and then falling down and getting chased. Like, I got lost because a house got painted once so the whole intersection looked different.

Lol, the music cue there is hilarious.

What a weird freakin dude. All aggressive and shit but then tosses over the inhaler. Mixed signals much?

“Only like a few years older” Uh, that man is clearly in his twenties. How old are these kids supposed to be? Are they seniors? I was thinking younger.

Of course cop’s kid recognizes random guy on sight from a violent crime from ten years ago. Yikes.

Okay, vet clinic letting a teenager close is a little weird. Maybe the vet’s on an emergency call? Also, maybe this is where Scott got his bandages the first time around.

Uh, like, is this the first time that day that Scott went back there? Why are the cats freaking out now?

I wonder how Allison got the dog in the car in the first place if it’s so aggressive.

Oooh, we have eye change.

Splint and painkiller seems reasonable, but, uh, usually they have an on call vet, and I feel like that might be an option.

Lol. The dog is judging you hard.

Aww, Scott making her feel better for her reaction. That’s sweet. It’s also interesting that he did it by feminizing himself instead of trying to convince her that her response was totally normal or that there was nothing wrong with being a girly girl. Not the usual take for a teenage boy.

“I hear this breed is very litigious.” That’s right, Scott says, I’m throwing out them big words because I got brains and brawn and compassion, pretty lady.

Oh my god, eyelash on the cheek too! How many tropes can we fit in this scene?

Scott is not your passive protagonist! Boy is shooting his shot!

BUT THE FULL MOON IS ON FRIDAY. Just in case you, like, missed it.

I dig the practical effect there.

No, but these music cues are still killing me. Also, how much was Scott shirtless in this episode? Like a good 50%, right?

The CGI wolf is bad.

I didn’t know lycanthropy came with sleepwalking. Well that’s terrifying.

Also, like, it’s interesting that the change is coming on slowly. It wasn’t immediate that night nor is it only going to happen during the full moon. It’s a bunch of little things and some are harder to deal with than others.

Honestly, that makes lycanthropy feel much more like an illness. A chronic illness that has weird symptoms and no one believes you? That sounds exactly like women and/or people of color trying to navigate healthcare.

“My mom does all the grocery shopping.” Oh. My. God. Baby boy, that was hilarious. He looked truly baffled, which does fit his character, but also his bff is a cop’s kid so like, I feel like he knows some drug lingo.

Scott flailing around trying to tell people the truth and nobody believes him.

Oh, yeah, clearly that boundaries lecture worked on cop’s kid.

Cop’s kid has ADHD, huh? That explains the impulsiveness without thinking things through, I guess. Doesn’t explain why he’s a dick though.

Like, here’s the thing. Cop’s kid isn’t wrong that people just can’t do that kind of thing overnight (and obviously isn’t wrong in this story). But, like, Scott’s been telling multiple people things like this for three days and literally everyone’s blown his concerns off. And now you’re coming to him with oh actually there is a wolf in California so now it must be werewolves and you expect him to believe you? Make it make sense.

Is this the first time we’ve heard cop kid’s name?

It’s funny that Stiles is like, this is totally true and factual information about werewolves that I looked up in this random book in my town’s library. Like, buddy. What? How would you know if any of it is actually true?

Stiles “the change can be caused by anger or anything that raises your plus.” Lol. The first physical werewolf change that we saw was Scott trying to calm a hurt dog down to help her. I mean, obviously it was the hearing thing first, but the show has made it seem like the hearing and smelling thing is an all the time deal whereas the eye color seemed like something different.

The almost punch was scary because it came out of nowhere. Scott has really been pretty even keeled this whole time. Also Scott apologized twice for the shove and the almost hit even though Stiles never did apologize for abandoning him in the woods. Still a dick.

Shirtless again.

All of these kids live in really nice houses. Which, like, is weird. Like, are we rural? Are we affluent suburb? What is the deal here?

Okay, creepy Derek who is clearly also a werewolf. Are you the biter in this scenario or just part of the pack?

Okay, what the fuck is Lydia’s deal? Like, do you just have no loyalty whatsoever? Every man and woman for themselves?

Was Stiles actually at the party totally chill or was that a hallucination of Scott’s? I can’t imagine the guy flailing earlier about werewolves and almost being punched just casually asking, “Yo, Scott, you good?”

Creepy Derek being creepier. Allison, girl, you better run.

Oh man, I feel so bad for Scott. This looks painful and terrifying.

Okay, Stiles gets points back again for going to check on Scott. But that does mean it was him at the party and not a hallucination, and that interaction still strikes me as weird.

Scott’s first thought being to have Stiles check on Allison even though he’s going through this painful, terrifying experience makes me feel things. 

Protection mode activated.

“She’s safe from you.”

Uh…bud? At the first sign of something wrong he left her and the only reason he’s out here is because you lured him with her jacket? Needlessly convoluted way of ‘helping’ does not instill confidence.

And then he attacks Scott. Great. A replay of the first night.

What. The. Fuck.

Did you luring him out there into a trap, asshole?

Ahh, lure him into a trap so that you can ‘save’ him. So you’re not just an asshole, but a manipulative asshole.

Is it really so bad, Scott? To be attacked and changed without your consent? To have no one ever believe you? To have people hunting you? To know that you can never be just a kid again?

The bite is a gift? A gift? Oh. Wow. Derek Hale, creepy stalker likes forcing things on people without their consent and then tells them that they should be grateful for it. Absolutely terrible garbage fire of a person (derogatory).

Okay, nope, I seriously hate this guy. Kick him in the balls, Scott.

Oh, hey, Stiles actually came back for Scott this time. Fine. That scene was kind of cute. And Stiles is clearly loyal. I guess he can stay, but he’s on thin ice.

Ugh, Scott who doesn’t want to lie, but won’t tell the truth is strangely endearing. Allison, I get you, girl.

Lol. Allison’s dad is the hunter, of course. 

So like, let’s think this through. Allison said her family moved around a lot, clearly tracking werewolf activity. So why Beacon Hills? The severed body being found and the wolf attack on Scott was literally the night before Allison showed up. So like, it had to be something else that pulled them there. I wonder what it was.