twdtrashfiction-blog

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

Him (Chapter Twenty-Three)

I spun around when I heard people busting through the doors. “What’s happennn-ing hhhhh” My voice dropped off and I damn near dropped Judith on the floor when I saw his face.

“______!” Carol yelled at me.

I quickly gripped onto Judith and laid her in her makeshift crib and bolted downstairs.

“What happened?!” I yelled again.

“The governor.” Maggie exclaimed.

“Daryl?” I pulled him into a hug all the while keeping an eye on his brother who barely even noticed I was standing there.

Was I seeing things? Why wasn’t he acknowledging me? Why wasn’t anyone saying anything? Why did no one tell me?

……..

The group told me what happened and that Axel had passed. No one mentioning a damn thing about Merle. Maybe I was crazy? When did I lose it, how long ago did my mind go?

Everything has settled down and I was up in my cell with Judith when Daryl walked by.

“Hey! Daryl!” I jumped up, whisper-yelling at him”

“You okay?” He asked walking back towards me.

“Come here please.”

“What’s wrong?” He asked concerned this time.

“At what point did I completely lose my mind?”

“Uhm, right after you were born I think?” He joked.

“Seriously.” I looked at him straight on.

“You think you’re crazy? Why?”

“Because apparently I’m seeing people that aren’t here.” I continued rocking Judith.

“Who ya seeing?” “Merle. I swear to god I saw him when you guys walked in but-” Darl cut me off before I could finish.

“You ain’t crazy. Merle’s here. He was at Woodbury.”

“Um, then why the hell did no one say anything and he didn’t even acknowledge me? Does he hate me that much?”

“Don’t think he knows what to say. He didn’t mention you when we were out in the woods. That’s where I was by the way. Assumin they didn’t tell ya. They weren’t gonna let Merle come back cause he’s the one that took Glenn and Maggie.”

“Holy shit.” I was dumbfounded.

“He’s in the cell down there. That’s where I was headed.”

I looked up at him. “Should I leave him be, or?”

“Think you should go talk to him.”

“What in the hell do I even say?”

“You always been good with words.” Daryl said as he walked out and went towards the stairs.

……..

I laid Judith down in her “crib” and walked down the upstairs hall towards Merle’s cell.

I made it halfway down the hall and then stopped to turn around, but forced myself to continue on.

I reached his cell and stood in the doorway, but he didn’t even know I was there.

I knocked on the bar with a barely audible “Hey.”

“Shit, you still fucking sneakin up on people?” He said startled and turned his head up at me.

“Sorry.” I looked down. “Can I come in?”

He raised his eyebrows up at me. “I ain’t gonna tell ya no.”

“But you’re not saying yes.”

“Just fucking come in.”

I walk just in the doorway, but not much beyond that.

“I ain’t gonna bite ya.” He said breaking the silence.

“I never know, you’re pretty unpredictable sometimes.”

“Would never dream of hurtin you sweet thing.” He half smiled.

“May never dream of it, but you did.”

“Well damn, we jumpin straight inta that huh?” He got up off of the bed and leaned against the frame.

“I don’t beat around the bush. You know this. Well, if you remember me anyways.”

“The fuck you mean by that? Remember ya”

I didn’t respond.

“Look, I’m sorry.”

“For?” I questioned.

“You know.”

“I do?” I wanted to hear him say it.

“Leavin and shit.”

“Oh? You mean it WAS intentional?” My face was stone cold; cold enough for even him to cowar.

“Baby, I didn’t leave to hurt you or nothin. I just-”

“Just what? You just needed to get away? Just were sick of me? Just pissed at me? Just sick of my shit?” I wanted to cry. I was blaming him with words, but I kicking the shit out of myself on the inside.

“Oh, so it’s my fault, yeah?” He stood up straight, I done pissed him off. “You sure you wanna go there sweetheart? Because if I remember correctly , you’re the bitch that shut me out.”

“Name calling already? I forgot how much I missed that.”

“Changing the subject already? Forgot how you did that when you realized you fucked up.”

“I did fuck up. I pushed you out because of some bullshit that your father said to me and I took all the anger and sorrow out on you. I get it, okay? I fucked up. I shouldn’t have done that. But you know what YOU shouldn’t have done? YOU shouldn’t have fucking left you piece of shit.”

“What’d you want me to fuckin do, huh? Come back so you could hate me some more? Hate me for somethin I didn’t even fuckin do? You’re right sweetie, you did fuck up. That’s on you. You know where I fucked up? I fucked up thinkin you were someone I wanted ta be with.”

Those last words cut me deep, but only fueled my anger more.

“You ass. I needed you! I was pregnant and I didn’t even know it! I needed you to be there and tell me it was okay and fight a little bit. I was overreacting and over emotional because I was carrying your child! And ya know what? Maybe if you would have stuck around I wouldn’t have sulked so much and would taken care of myself. And maybe if I took care of myself i wouldn’t have lost OUR baby!”

I knew everyone could hear us. Judith had started crying but someone grabbed her because she went silent. We didn’t give a shit. This is how we did things. We yell. I was never that person before him. I was always quiet and talked things out, but for some reason I could only get things through his thick skull by yelling.

“You were pregnant?” He said and his shoulders instantly relaxed.

“Yeah. I was. But I was dumb and I lost it.”

Merle opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out and he set his jaw instead.

“I just don’t understand why, Merle. Why didn’t you come back?” My tone was soft and sincere.

“I was dying when they found me. Cut off my hand, was bleedin out. Wasn’t that I didn’t want to, just couldn’t.” He paused, “Figured you’d done be gone.”

“You were buddy buddy with that crazy piece of shit. You hurt Glenn.”

“That ain’t me. I do what I’m told. Desperate times, desperate measures, right?” He replied.

“You’ve killed a lot of people haven’t you?”

“And you think I’ma monster.” He held up his arm, “Especially with this thing.” He laughed.

“I don’t think you’re a monster. And if I did it wouldn’t be because you don’t have a hand, dumbass.” I smirked.

“I still love you.” I said walking towards him.

“Yeah?” He smiled, holding himself up taller and more proud.

“Yeah.” I slinked myself into his chest and he wrapped his arms around me.

“Missed you.” He said running his hand down my back and gripping my ass.

“Missed you too.” I said biting his neck.

He walked back until he sat himself on the bed and pulled me into his lap.

“We shouldn’t do this right now.” I said slightly moaning as he sucked on my neck.

“They don’t wanna see, they don’t gotta watch.” He said resting his hand under my shirt on the back of my hip.

I slipped his shirt off and ran my hands up his broad chest and pushing him onto his back.

He damn near ripped my shirt off while I straddled his waist grinding down against him. Kissing his chest I felt him get hard against my clothed cunt. I was nipping at his neck when I slipped my hand between us and unbuttoned his pants.

He started sucking on my nipple and kneading my ass before mumbling “Fuck I missed your tits and ass.”

“I missed your dick.”

He laughed I stood up to take my pants off.I lowered myself down and took his hard member into my hand getting back over him, but lower down this time so I could put him in my mouth.

I started slowly bobbing my head up and down, being sure to take him all the way down with deep strokes.

I heard him breathe “Fucking shit.” before he pulled me up by my hair.

“Gonna have to stop that shit or I’m gonna cum in yer mouth, princess.”

I giggled and lowered my hips down to his pelvis, taking him into a deep kiss before raising my hips and grabbing his cock in my palm to line him up with my entrance.

He slid my hips down just enough to get the tip of his head in before slipping his tongue in my mouth. Just as I relaxed to his tongue re-familiarizing itself with my mouth he gave one hard thrust up into causing him to slide all the way into me until there was no more room for him to go.

I moaned deep into his mouth and gripped onto his shoulders.

“Fuck, Merle.”

“You good?”

“Uh huh, just bigger than I remember.”

“Makes ya feel any better yer tighter than I remember.”

We both laughed breathlessly as I sped my hips up and down and in circular motions. I was trying so hard to make myself last as long as I could, but I could feel myself getting closer and closer to the edge of orgasm.

He started grunting in my ear and thrusting upward and the next thing I knew I was whispering in his ear “I’m cumming.” With that he took control of hips and himself; sitting up and pulling me flush against him. His thrusts were deep and hard and hitting in all of the right places.

I came hard, crashing my head into the crook of his neck. My climax shaking me into a state of bliss. I couldn’t have formed a sentence no matter how hard I tried.

With one last full stroke, pulling my whole body down against him, he came deep inside me. I could feel his cock throbbing the last few drops out into me.

I rolled off of him and cuddled into his side.

“Fuck that was good.” He said

“Uh, huh.” Was all I could manage.

He laughed and wrapped his arm around my back to keep me close.

We laid there in silence, basking in the atmosphere of ourselves; forgetting where we were.

“Glad you two made up quick.” Daryl said with a hint of disapproval, holding a crying Judith in the doorway.

“Duked it out the old fashion way.” Merle laughed sitting up.

“Screaming at one another?” Daryl questioned.

“It’s what we do brother.” Merle responded.

I could see something was different. Daryl’s entire demeanor had changed, but I couldn’t quite figure out why.

“You wanna stick around and watch or ya gonna walk yourself outta here?” Merle snapped, side eyeing his brother.

“Was just leavin.” Daryl darted his eyes at me as he finished those last words.

The look that came through his eyes told me that he wanted to talk and he was not okay with this.

……..

“Hey.” I muttered softly leaning back against the wall.

Daryl turned around to see that it was me, only to turn back around to keep watch, or to ignore me.

“Quiet tonight.” I said trying to gain some attention.

“M-hm.” was all I received in return.

“I know things have been rough lately, and we haven’t been on the best of terms. The tension between us just continues to grow and I think that we should address that.” I crossed my arms at my chest.

“Don’t think you should do this.” He finally looked back at me.

“Do what?” I asked softly.

“He ain’t good for you. He’s fine now, but that’s now. He’s gonna be different sooner than later.”

“Maybe, maybe not. He’s been gone for so long and I finally have him back.”

Daryl nodded his head and turned himself back around. I unfolded my arms and let them fall to my side as I turned to walk away. I knew this conversation was over, but there were new unanswered questions now. Why was he so concerned all of a sudden?

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

Him (Chapter Twenty-Two)

The pain was sharp and soul crushing. I knew from the first cramp what this was.

And then the blood came...and came...and came. I thought it would never end.

I sat perched on the toilet in the house while the blood drained from me and i held my stomach riddled with excruciating pain.

I finally got the courage to get up and return outside, but when I did, the place was in ruins. Walkers swarmed the place and everyone was running. My first thoughts were, “Damn that house is sound proof” followed by “FUCK.”

I ran searching for someone, anyone really, when I finally caught up to Lori and we got off into cars. We all met up on the freeway where we originally were before Hershel’s farm.

…….

“Haven’t said much since we left.” Daryl mumbled as he sat himself down next to me.

We had drove until we ran out of gas and we settled in that spot. It was cold, winter was just a couple of days away.

“What is there to say?” I finally replied.

“Ya look sick.”

“Thanks, Daryl. How sweet of you to notice.” My tone was sour enough to scare off anyone… Anyone but Daryl.

“Ya don’t sound sick. What’s going on.”

At sat in silence, debating if I should tell him the truth or not.

“I lost the baby.” I figured he would find out eventually, might as well be now.

Daryl looked at me with pain and sorrow.

“How’d it happen?” A response finally leaving his lips.

“Not really sure. I’ve had problems since the beginning, you know that. It just kind of happened. I knew it the second I felt the pain.”

“Why didn’t ya tell me?” I sensed a bit of anger in his voice.

“A lot of shit has happened, Daryl. I didn’t know how to bring it up, or if I even wanted to. I didn’t know how you would react or feel. Hell, I don’t know how I feel.”

“Relieved?” He spat.

“What?” I paused, anger filling my veins. “Relieved? You think I’m happy I lost the her? I feel like shit. I was finally starting to be happy. The moment I felt joy it got ripped from me and you think I’m relieved? Maybe if you took two seconds to talk to me recently you would know that this is upsetting.”  

“Her?”

“What?” I questioned

“You said you lost “her.” It was a girl?”

“Shit, I don’t know. It was something Carl and I did, an old wise tale, witchy thing that tells you the sex of your baby. It’s nothing set in stone. Just a trick. But it seemed right. I felt like it was girl.” I was rambling, trying not to cry.

“I’m sorry.”

I couldn’t tell if he was sincere or not, so my only response was “Yeah.” as I turned away from him.

I could feel him blaming me. Like I did something or didn’t take this pregnancy seriously enough causing myself to lose the baby. In reality, the pregnancy wasn’t right from the beginning. There was nothing I could have done to stay healthy, but I would hold this over myself for awhile, and his judgement was the last thing I needed.

……..

It was a long winter, but we made it.

Daryl and Rick found a prison that we are now calling home.

Beth sang as we spent our first night in the yard of the prison. The next day we cleared what we could.

……..

In the mean time, we found three people, prisoners, two of which died; Andrew and Big Tiny. Oscar, the third prisoner, remained alive.

A herd of Walkers made their way in and we had to fight them off. T-dog was bitten and Lori had the baby, Judith, a beautiful little girl. Lori passed during the cesarean and was shot by her own son, Carl.

Daryl found Carol’s headband and assumed she had also died. But we soon found out she was still alive.

I had taken on the main role of caring for Judith. This filled my void and broke my heart all at once, but I was thankful to stay busy.

……..

Weeks had passed but the events just kept coming.

We met a woman, named Michonne, that brought us formula and informed us that Maggie and Glenn had been captured by a man from Woodbury.

“I’m going with you.” I insisted as Rick informed me that they were going to find Glenn and Maggie.

“No, you need to stay here.” Rick said harshly.

“They are my family too, I should be going with you not sitting here on my ass.”

“Judith needs you.” Beth decided to chime in, not helping.

“Stay here and take care of my little girl.” Rick said more softly than before.

“Daryl? Care to help me?” I looked over to him.

“You should stay here, ____.” He gave into Rick’s wishes.

I said nothing in return, but instead turned on my heel and went to feed Judith.

……..

“Just you and me huh?” I said to Judith as if she could understand me clearly.

She looked up at me with tender eyes while suckling on her bottle.

“You look good like that.” Carol said to me as she walked into my cell.

“What?” I chuckled.

“With a baby in your arms. She really likes you.” Carol smiled and leaned in the doorway.

“Yeah, I enjoy it a little I guess.”

Judith grunted and closed her eyes as I pulled the empty bottle from her lips.

“Come help me when you’re finished?” Carol asked.

“Sure! Just let me get her to sleep. It shouldn’t take long, she’s really sleepy.”

Carol nodded and walked out as I rocked Judith to a sweet slumber.

……..

Carl introduced us to the people that had shown up in the prison, and we decided that it was Rick’s call.

……..

Rick, Glenn and Maggie came back to the prison as I was helping Carol in the kitchen.

“Hey, do me a favor and don’t tell her. Not yet.” I heard Rick say as they walked in.

“Tell who what?” I questioned? Hugging both Glenn and Maggie as they came in the kitchen.

“Nothing.” Rick said.

“Where’s Daryl?” Carol asked, beating me to the question.

“He’s angry about something, he’ll be back later.” Rick said suspiciously.

“Oooo-kay?” I stumbled out.

Rick had an outburst upon meeting the group of people, and they rushed out of the prison, attempting to get as far away from him as possible.

……..

“Ain’t got much to say huh?” Merle said to Daryl as they walked on.

“Tryin to think of what to say.” Daryl replied to his older brother.

“What the fuck does that mean?” Merle, defensive as always.

“You left. We came back for you, but ya left. A lot happened.” Daryl stumbled a little, trying not to give too much away at once.

“Like fucking what? Can’t be much more than what happened to me.”

“You hear that?” Daryl paused.

“Yeah, wild animals gettin wild.” Merle smirked at his brother.

“No, that’s a baby.”

“Oh come on, why don't you just piss in my ear and tell me it's raining.”

It was a baby. They found a group of people being terrorized by walkers and Daryl saved them. Merle tried to loot the car but Daryl held his bow at him before they got into a fight and Daryl decided to go back to the group.

……..

I was tending to Judith inside the prison when it happened.

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

Daryl, Denise and Tara | The Walking Dead

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

One of the toughest things when we did season three was Merle dies in episode 15, and in episode 16 there’s not even a mention of him being gone. […] I remember Norman Reedus saying, ‘Don’t I get a chance to grieve him for one episode?’

Greg Nicotero, Variety [online] (08/Feb/2015)

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

You want to know what I was before all this?

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This still feels more like me… than back in them houses. That’s pretty messed up, huh?

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“The folks here, they’re strong. Good fighters. But they ain’t killers.” “Rick is. Maggie is. Carl put down his own mother.”

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Some kids are led astray by their abusive parents, meanwhile others aren’t.

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I’m just tired of losing people.

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“Ain’t nobody ever gonna care about you except me, little brother.”

PLEASE DON’T REPOST, DON’T RE-EDIT. THANK YOU.

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

(x)

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

#classicsupernatural #wastreasure

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

Him (Chapter Twenty-One)

Notes: So, I'm trying to decide how I want to go with a certain part of this story. I have two ideas and I'm leaning more towards one of them, but am considering doing an alternate if anyone were interested?

Talk about a whirlwind of shit. The CDC ended in chaos and we lost Jaqui. Hell, we almost lost Andrea and then Dale. I can’t say I didn’t consider staying myself. Going up in an explosion seemed like a better plan, but Daryl yanking my arm and dragging me out didn’t give me too many options.

We lost Sophia too. Daryl continued to search for her, we all did, but he took it to an extra level. We found her as a walker. Rick killed her. Carl got shot. Hershel, the owner of the farm we are staying at is a Dr. or a vet, but as good as a doctor can get out here. T-dog almost died from a blood infection; thank god for Daryl having Merle’s stash of medications and antibiotics.

When Daryl isn’t being mopey he tells me that everything is “okay” and that having this baby isn’t a bad thing. I’m still in disbelief, but the tell-tale symptoms are making it a reality.

Glenn has a crush on Maggie, one of Hershel’s daughters. Hershel’s other daughter, Beth, wants to kill herself. Oh, and did I mention Lori is pregnant too? It’s great. Fucking great.

……..

“You ever gonna quit moping about being pregnant? You should be happy. It’s a blessing.” Carol lectured me for the millionth time.

“A blessing?” I chuckled. “More like a burd-” I was cut off by Carol yelling

“Don’t you dare say that baby is a burden. How could you?”

“I didn’t want it, Carol. It has no father. I have to raise it in a world like this. Why on earth would or should I be happy about that?”

“First of all, stop calling your baby an it. Two, so what? Merle not being here does not mean you can’t be a good mother out here. You and both know that Daryl will most likely step up to the plate.”

“I don’t want to have to do that, Carol. Why give him the responsibility of something that isn’t his fault?” I argued.

“You are what, three or four months pregnant? Or about that? You have six months to figure this out. A lot could change by then. And no, of course if he doesn’t want to he doesn’t have to, but if he is willing to step and be the father figure of this child, let him, ____. Take the help people are gladly willing to give you.”

She had a point, but I was too deep into my own misery to see it. Plus, Daryl hardly spoke to me anymore so who says he’s going to want to help me raise a kid?

……..

“How are you feeling?” Hershel asked me as he pressed around on my belly.

“Like I’m pregnant.” I said monotone.

“Any issues that I need to know about?” He looked up at me as if he knew I should be telling him something.

“Nope.” I wasn’t biting the bait he gave me.

“Are you sure? Daryl and Carol said you were experiencing some cramping.” He sat back with a stern look.

“I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“They acted like it was something.” He paused. “You need to take care of yourself. No more heavy physical activity. It could be dangerous with your increased amount of cramping. Understood?” He lectured me.

“No jumping off the buildings or cage fighting the walkers. Got it.” This smartmouth is going to get me in trouble one of these days.

……..

“You think it’s gonna be a girl or a boy?” Carl questioned.

“I dunno. My intuition hasn’t kicked in yet. You wanna know a trick to finding out?” I smiled.

“How? We don’t have any of those machines.” He looked up at me.

I took my favorite lucky necklace off and began to explain to Carl

“Well, an old trick is you take a piece of your jewelry, like a ring, a bracelet, or a necklace and you wrap a piece of your hair around it.” I pulled a piece of my hair out and looped it around the necklace.

“Then what?” Carl asked intrigued.

“I need your assistance okay?” “Okay.” He came over to me.

“I’m going to lay down and you’re going to hold the necklace by the piece of hair over my stomach. You have to hold it steady, though.”

I layed down it he came to sit by my side.

“Okay, not take the necklace and touch it to my stomach right here.” I pointed to lower part of my abdomen. “Now that it’s steady bring it up and continue to hold it like that WITHOUT moving your hand or wrist, okay?”

He did just as I told and the necklace started moving ever so slightly attempting to figure out what direction to swing.

Carl’s eyes were bright with curiousity and we both were watching the necklace move intently. The necklace began moving from side to side and didn’t slow.

“What does it mean?!” Carl asked enthusiastically.

“Well, according to the trick if it moves from side to side it’s a girl and if it moves in circles it’s a boy.”

“Sooo, it’s a girl?!” Carl looked at me.

“According to the necklace.”

Lori walked over just as I sat up.

“Mom! She’s having a girl! We have to do you next!” Carl cheered to his mother.

“I forgot about that trick. We’ll do it later okay? Why don’t you go play?” Lori smiled at her son as he ran away.

“Getting a little more excited, are we?” Lori leaned against the tree.

“Trying to. It’s hard.” I looked down as I spoke.

“I know you miss him. And I know it makes it even more difficult to forget now that you’re having his baby.”

“I feel guilty. About everything.”

Lori walked over to sit next to me. “You can’t let that eat at you. He had every chance to fix things. He left.” She said.

“So did I. He tried multiple times and I kept shutting him out. I know he left, but maybe he wouldn’t have if he had something to come back to.”

“No. He did have something to come back to and he didn’t. If not you, his brother. You cannot blame yourself for the bad decisions he made. Yeah, maybe you could have opened up more, but that is not an excuse for the way he acted or the way he left.” She rubbed my hand as she spoke.

“I guess.”

“You are going to love that baby when it’s born, trust me. Give it time.” She said as she began to get up. “Now, I’m going to find my son.” She half smiled.

“Thanks, Lori.” I layed back and rubbed my stomach, drinking in the little bit of sunlight.

……..

“Shouldn’t ya be showin by now?” Daryl asked as he looked down at my belly.

“I’m barely three months. It’s not until after three months that you start showing, some people not until later than that.” I replied and rubbed my hand over belly.

“Hm.” Daryl grunted.

“Calm down. Before you know it I won’t be able to see my feet or bend over to pick something up. And then you’ll have to do it for me.” I taunted ad stuck my tongue out at him.

“ I ain’t yer slave.” he joked.

……..

“I-I-shit-I love you.” He said as he pulled his head up from the crook of my neck.

I ran my hands up his chest and around his back to cup his shoulder and pull him closer as he lay over top of me.

“I love you too.” I murmured as our lips press softly together.

He leaned his head back down into my neck kissing and nibbling just enough to send shiver up my spine and make my thighs squeeze again his waist.

He knew just how to work every inch of my body. He could make me weak with just one action. Finding new ways to make me shake was his hobby and he never failed at it. By the time he was finished with me I was shivering, breathless, and forgot how to speak full and sentences.

“Fuck princess, that was good.” He paused to lift himself off of me and roll over. “I gotta piss, though.”

I laid there waiting for him to come back so I could snuggle into him and fall asleep peacefully, but minutes went by and he still wasn’t back.

“Love?” No answer. “You okay?” Still, no answer.

I rose to my feet and slipped on his button up over my shoulders, not worrying to button any of it, as I walked towards the bathroom that was connected to his bedroom.

I knocked; nothing. Worry setting in I turned the knob and pushed the door open slowly, receiving nothing as a response.

“Merle!” I screamed running over to him slunked down against the bathtub with the syringe still hanging out of his arm and his head rolled forward.

“Baby! Wake up!” I yelled again slapping his face a little trying to wake him up.

“DARYL! HELP! HELP!” I cried as he finally came rushing in. “Call 9-1-1! He’s gone. It’s bad this time.”

Sometimes Merle would overdose but we could snap him out of it, sounds unbelievable, but it’s true. He had overdosed so many times in his life that if it was little he could snap out of it enough for us to nurse him back if we were careful. This was not one of those times.

The operator told us not to remove the needle, to let the paramedics handle it when they got there so we did as we were told and left it. Shortly the medics came rushing in and within seconds I heard “No pulse.”

My heart fell in my stomach and formed a knot. They tried their hardest, but within minutes, they pronounced him dead.

Tears were streaming hot down my face and falling to the ground as fast as a new one could form and I was begging them “No, no. He can’t. You have to do something! Please!” but I knew that was it. He was gone. He told me he loved me and then he was gone. Just like that.

……..

I found myself sobbing in a pool of my own tears as Daryl jerked me awake.

“_____, wake up. Hey, hey. You good?”

I looked around and at Daryl’s face confused until I finally realized that I was just dreaming. I knew I was awake but I could feel the pain just the same and I was breathing just as heavy.

“You were yellin in yer sleep for Merle and then me. Ya grabbed me so hard ya damn near tore ma arm off.” Daryl said staring at my puffy eyes.

“He died. He said I-l-lo-love you and then-and-and-and he d-died.” I stuttered out in between sobs.

“Hey, it was just a dream. Stop cryin.” He wiped the tears from my eyes and laid a hand on my thigh.

“I miss him so bad. I fucked up and pushed him so far that he starting using again and thought that I didn’t love him and I didn’t get to say I was sorry before he left. I drove him to leaving and now I’ll never see him again. I fucked up so bad and I have to have his baby and know that I’m the reason it’s father isn’t here.” I started sobbing yet again.

“_____” Daryl pulled me into a hug.

As I sobbed on his shoulder he kept ahold of me and spoke “It ain’t yer fault he starting usin, or left, er nothing okay? That was him. He’s a piece a shit like that sometimes.” He halted his words and I pulled away.

“I know ya miss him.”

I laid down and curled into myself facing away from Daryl continuing to cry on my own.

……..

The nightmares just kept on coming; each one a little worse than the last in their own way. They ranged from him killing himself to me killing him to him hating our child to him getting killed and so on so on. Every night I either woke myself or woke up to Daryl shaking me and I wondered if it would ever stop.

So far, the nightmares hadn’t stopped and the real life terrors kept coming full force.

Dale got bit by a walker and Daryl had to put a bullet in him.

Shane and Rick got into it causing Rick to kill him and Carl came behind and put a bullet through walker Shane’s head.

Daryl got close to Beth. Maggie and Glenn are together. Andrea distanced herself and so did I.

I felt lost, alone, and like a burden so when things went wrong, I kept it to myself.

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

Mary, can I tell you something? Even if this sounds really weird. Will you promise me that you will remember? Okay.

[twdtrashfiction-blog]

So, I’m thinking about doing some writing for either other characters or something from Supernatural but I don’t have any bright ideas off the top of my head at the moment. 

Does anyone have any requests or suggestions? If you do, send me an ask or a message! (: