u-rlly-r-a-total-buffoon - Tumblr blog

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this is beautiful

merlin ladies fest » day 3: favorite quote vs favorite scene ↪ gwen in 1x06 [style inspired by the very talented queens @anya-chalotra and @inejz-ghafa]

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Gwen + Ancient Greek Forms of Love (insp) Merlin | Arthur

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🤩 🍑 😍

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Based off this post because the idea made me laugh and because I can.

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obsessed with merlin and that one quote by john steinbeck that says “and now that you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good.” in the sense of his immortality and him learning to actually live over time, because  think about it. he grew up with the knowledge that one real slip-up of magic in front of somebody would get him burned at the stake, so he always had to pretend like he didn’t have it (even if he was awful at it at times). if he ever got caught, if he wasn’t perfect, he would be dead (presumably, with the whole immortality thing yknow). and then he waltzes into camelot and gets this destiny on a silver platter wherein he learns he’s emrys and he’s meant to protect the once and future king into order to unite albion blah blah blah. and we, as an audience, see that change him: we see less and less of merlin and more and more of emrys as he fixates on protecting arthur so heavily that he’s willing to do damn near anything and kill anyone to ensure that he was safe. he had to be the perfect protector, otherwise all the effort he’s put in and the people he’s lost and his seemingly-abnormal amount of magic was for nothing—he even thinks he might be a monster in the first episode, and in a deleted scene with lancelot he even admits that he used to think he was cursed. he had to be perfect, to be emrys, because if he wasn’t then it was all for nothing.

and then, of course, arthur dies, and life goes on. whether he returns to camelot  afterwards and serves at gwen’s court or wanders away from camelot after that is honestly up to personal interpretation, but i would assume that arthur dying broke something in him because it was confirmation that it was all for nothing, and then his friends and family dying one-by-one after that (gaius, hunith, percival, leon, gwen) would only make it worse. he’d probably go back to assuming that he was cursed, that he was a monster, or something else along those lines—he’d revert back to those ways of thinking of himself that began long before he came to camelot. and then something happens, hundreds of years or so down the line—maybe it’s a normal, everyday event, or a dire situation where someone is in danger, or even if it’s just a thought that pops into his head, but he realizes that wasting away like he is…is just making everything worse. 

so he gets involved somehow. he slowly learns how to properly reintegrate back into society. all of his days are bad days, but he manages to wave hello to his kindly old neighbors and he stops to help a man up when he’s fallen down and, maybe it’s just his imagination, but the sun seems a little brighter for the rest of the day. he starts employing his magic to do everyday things, too—he starts making pictures out of embers again, and he enchants his broom to clean the floor by itself, and he gets a table and turns it bright yellow just because he feels like it, and he’s spent so much of his life hiding it that using it in plain sight like this is both unnerving and exciting. he uses his magic to build a little house just enough outside of whatever town he’s living in that he can use magic without being seen and he absolutely goes to town on a new garden just because he can. he makes new friends and hangs out with them and laughs, really laughs, at a joke one of them makes for the first time in a long time. and when they pass on, when he feels the heartbreak start to settle in and he wonders why he even tried at all, he realizes his grief is just a symptom of love and that he’d rather feel the pain of loss than nothing at all and that at least he had the honor of knowing them, all these people who brightened up his life, and that their memory would live on forever in a being like him.

he doesn’t use his magic in fleeting bursts of self-defense and loneliness anymore⁠—he uses it to clean, to grow, to heal (the earth, mostly, but even people if they know about his magic and will allow him to do so) and he learns and grows and heals with it. sometimes he still wakes up and he’s sad to his core, but then he sneezes and flowers sprout at his feet and it’s almost impossible not to laugh. he gardens and the sun is warm. he washes the dishes and accidentally breaks one but the only consequence is a broken dish, not people’s lives. he doesn’t have to be perfect anymore. he can be good.

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"Thank you for saving my life."

"You'd do the same for me."

merthur parallels from 1x04 & 5x07 that make me emotional

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He‘s so cute I-

MERLIN (2008 - 2012) Merlin ▶ Season 2, Episode 03: “The Nightmare Begins”

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the fact that merlin didn’t see this is a crime

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I really should practice drawing women more.

Well, anyway here’s a drawing of my fav Queen Gwen

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Sometimes I think about Gwaine and think that it’s just the fandom exaggerating his character. 

But then I remember that this is a man who once dreamed of eating an apple pie flavored cheese. Who once reached into a beehive because he was hungry and was “riding to his death anyways.” Who once lit his socks on fire. Who hid in the kitchen roof to steal a chicken. 

And that And then I remember that the actor is a man who, over quarantine, updated his fans with daily pictures of him and his stuffed goat. With whom he created a cooking show featuring his bare ass for the entire world.

And then I realize that I was wrong.

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🥺 🥺 🥺

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Can we please discuss how in the first gif Arthur still has blood on his face, while in the bottom one he doesn’t? Meaning that either he wiped the blood off himself, which is unlikely because he doesn’t have a cloth to do so, or that Merlin came to clean Arthur’s face in the middle of the night when Arthur was sleeping 😭❤️

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merthurweek2021: day 7 - free day

arthur and merlin saying each other’s names for the first and last time.