underroot

[underroot]

Looking towards relationships, I find it hard to get myself involved in someone else and feel deserving of their love. I’ve always felt that I consistently have to prove why I am qualified to love. I don’t ask myself enough, does the other person deserve me? That isn’t to say they don’t, but questioning things is something I do everyday, and I don’t know why I can’t ask myself that enough. 

[underroot]

The past few weeks i’ve been thinking about eulogy and what its place in my life. What does mourning look like and the words that follow. When is something gone and who and what is deserving of eulogy. 

[underroot]

I don’t remember this photo being taken, but I’m sure I had a great time. Partying at Harrison’s place has becoming a weekend thing, but it’s fun dancing with the friends every weekend. College has been tempting, there are a lot of drugs and partying. Finding my place in it all is something i’m still working through. 

[underroot]

with the friends, day trip to Buffalo Exchange. Lovely day captured on 35mm 

[underroot]

love my friends

[underroot]

it’s 3:10am

I’m sick and I kinda feel like shit 1) because I feel bad that I bailed on Lucas and I meeting up cause I’m sick even though that’s valid 2) I’m sick

Currently looking for a new phone background and other than that I think I’m going to try and maybe make some moodboards later tomorrow or this week. It would be sick to be able to look back on that and see where I was artistically

Oh how could I forget, I got to perform and see Golden (@mylesgolden) and they even said we should hang out sometime!! They are a literal genius, and it’s an honor that they fuck with me on some level! 🌸💕💖✨ I told them I’d message them on ig, idk when Ill do it but definitely after I’m not sick

Drayton also mentioned that there are spots open for internships at Highsnobiey but I’d have to be in NYC over the summer and I don’t have a place to stay if I went :( if only I was rich in some parallel universe, I’d have a nice small studio apartment with a little window and access to a fire escape. It would be super cozy and I’d bring just some essential clothes and a little something to flex. There would be a coffee shop just around the block that I’d stop by in my morning commute to the office, oh the places I’d be if I had money.

[underroot]

We also went to the ICA and saw [somename] The visitors and it was literally the best instillation I’ve ever seen. The videos actually made me feel emotional, and the singing was just too beautiful

[underroot]

It’s been an eventful week, love my friends

I think I might start video blogging who knows

[underroot]

It’s 6:29 AM, Taotao and I have been in this common room not doing homework for like 8 hours. Liv Mas ladies 

[underroot]

Soooo... I went partying this weekend with the girlies (taotao, Yuhan, and Ranoe). Saturday was the Index Funrager and it was really successful! We made $630!! Kinda wish I knew how to flirt with guys, but o well, it kinda sucks. 

in the past few days I also got this really cute gucci bag, did the Lust shoot for Ugly Mag, and went to Bodega for the first time (I got my first tote, and a lighter)