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Hey btw, here's a piece of life advice:

If you know what you'd have to do to solve a problem, but you just don't want to do it, your main problem isn't the problem itself. Your problem is figuring out how to get yourself to do the solution.

If your problem is not eating enough vegetables, the problem you should be solving is "how do I make vegetables stop being yucky". If your problem is not getting enough exercise, the problem you should be solving is "how do I make exercise stop sucking ass". You're not supposed to just be doing things that are awful and suck all the time forever, you're supposed to figure out how to make it stop being so awful all the time.

I used to hate wearing sunscreen because it's sticky and slimy and disgusting and it feels bad and it smells bad, so I neglected to wear it even if I needed to. Then I found one that isn't like that, and doesn't smell and feel gross. Problem solved.

There is no correct way to live that's just supposed to suck and feel bad all the time. You're allowed to figure out how to make it not suck so bad.

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Here's a tip.

If you find yourself procrastinating and demotivated to work on whatever needs to be done, don't force yourself. Do the counterintuitive thing and let your mind rest.

If you're sitting on your phone all day feeling bad for not doing any work, you're still not doing any work - and you're gonna feel like shit the next day.

Instead, take a proper day off. Do something creative, or some self care. Get all your ideas out. Recharge your batteries. Tomorrow you'll have the energy to tackle your task again!

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an educational graphic about critical thinking for tumnblr

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https://wordcounter.io/blog/101-standout-argumentative-essay-topic-ideas

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Naomi Shihab Nye, “Sometimes I Pretend.” A Maze Me: Poems for Girls

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“I’m finally going to write! I have a great idea!”

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I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?

HI darling,

I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:

Home

what the hell is a mortgage?

first apartment essentials checklist

how to care for cacti and succulents

the care and keeping of plants

Getting an apartment

Money

earn rewards by taking polls

how to coupon

what to do when you can’t pay your bills

see if you’re paying too much for your cell phone bill

how to save money

How to Balance a Check Book

How to do Your Own Taxes

Health

how to take care of yourself when you’re sick

things to bring to a doctor’s appointment

how to get free therapy

what to expect from your first gynecologist appointment

how to make a doctor’s appointment

how to pick a health insurance plan

how to avoid a hangover

a list of stress relievers

how to remove a splinter

Emergency

what to do if you get pulled over by a cop

a list of hotlines in a crisis

things to keep in your car in case of an emergency

how to do the heimlich maneuver

Job

time management

create a resume

find the right career

how to pick a major

how to avoid a hangover

how to interview for a job

how to stop procrastinating

How to write cover letters

Travel

ULTIMATE PACKING LIST

Traveling for Cheap

Travel Accessories

The Best Way to Pack a Suitcase

How To Read A Map

How to Apply For A Passport

How to Make A Travel Budget

Better You

read the news

leave your childhood traumas behind

how to quit smoking

how to knit

how to stop biting your nails

how to stop procrastinating

how to stop skipping breakfast

how to stop micromanaging

how to stop avoiding asking for help

how to stop swearing constantly

how to stop being a pushover

learn another language

how to improve your self-esteem

how to sew

learn how to embroider

how to love yourself

100 tips for life

Apartments/Houses/Moving

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 1: Are You Sure? (The Responsible One)

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 2: Finding the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 3: Questions to Ask about the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)

Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 4: Packing and Moving All of Your Shit (The Responsible One)

How to Protect Your Home Against Break-Ins (The Responsible One)

Education

How to Find a Fucking College (The Sudden Adult)

How to Find Some Fucking Money for College (The Sudden Adult)

What to Do When You Can’t Afford Your #1 Post-Secondary School (The Sudden Adult)

Stop Shitting on Community College Kids (Why Community College is Fucking Awesome) (The Responsible One)

How to Ask for a Recommendation Letter (The Responsible One)

How to Choose a College Major (The Sudden Adult)

Finances

How to Write a Goddamn Check (The Responsible One)

How to Convince Credit Companies You’re Not a Worthless Bag of Shit (The Responsible One)

Debit vs Credit (The Responsible One)

What to Do if Your Wallet is Stolen/Lost (The Sudden Adult)

Budgeting 101 (The Responsible One)

Important Tax Links to Know (The Responsible One)

How to Choose a Bank Without Screwing Yourself (The Responsible One)

Job Hunting

How to Write a Resume Like a Boss (The Responsible One)

How to Write a Cover Letter Someone Will Actually Read (The Responsible One)

How to Handle a Phone Interview without Fucking Up (The Responsible One)

10 Sites to Start Your Job Search (The Responsible One)

Life Skills

Staying in Touch with Friends/Family (The Sudden Adult)

Bar Etiquette (The Sudden Adult)

What to Do After a Car Accident (The Sudden Adult)

Grow Up and Buy Your Own Groceries (The Responsible One)

How to Survive Plane Trips (The Sudden Adult)

How to Make a List of Goals (The Responsible One)

How to Stop Whining and Make a Damn Appointment (The Responsible One)

Miscellaneous

What to Expect from the Hell that is Jury Duty (The Responsible One)

Relationships

Marriage: What the Fuck Does It Mean and How the Hell Do I Know When I’m Ready? (Guest post - The Northwest Adult)

How Fucked Are You for Moving In with Your Significant Other: An Interview with an Actual Real-Life Couple Living Together™ (mintypineapple  and catastrofries)

Travel & Vehicles

How to Winterize Your Piece of Shit Vehicle (The Responsible One)

How to Make Public Transportation Your Bitch (The Responsible One)

Other Blog Features

Apps for Asshats

Harsh Truths & Bitter Reminders

Asks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later

Apartments (or Life Skills) - How Not to Live in Filth (The Sudden Adult)

Finances - Tax Basics (The Responsible One)

Important Documents - How to Get a Copy of Your Birth Certificate (The Responsible One)

Important Documents - How to Get a Replacement ID (The Responsible One)

Health - How to Deal with a Chemical Burn (The Responsible One)

Job Hunting - List of Jobs Based on Social Interaction Levels (The Sudden Adult)

Job Hunting - How to Avoid Falling into a Pit of Despair While Job Hunting (The Responsible One)

Job Hunting - Questions to Ask in an Interview (The Responsible One)

Life Skills - First-Time Flying Tips (The Sudden Adult)

Life Skills - How to Ask a Good Question (The Responsible One)

Life Skills - Reasons to Take a Foreign Language (The Responsible One)

Life Skills - Opening a Bar Tab (The Sudden Adult)

Relationships - Long Distance Relationships: How to Stay in Contact (The Responsible One)

Adult Cheat Sheet:

what to do if your pet gets lost

removing stains from your carpet

how to know if you’re eligible for food stamps

throwing a dinner party

i’m pregnant, now what?

first aid tools to keep in your house

how to keep a clean kitchen

learning how to become independent from your parents

job interview tips

opening your first bank account

what to do if you lose your wallet

tips for cheap furniture

easy ways to cut your spending

selecting the right tires for your car

taking out your first loan

picking out the right credit card

how to get out of parking tickets

how to fix a leaky faucet

get all of your news in one place

getting rid of mice & rats in your house

when to go to the e.r.

buying your first home

how to buy your first stocks

guide to brewing coffee

first apartment essentials checklist

coping with a job you hate

30 books to read before you’re 30

what’s the deal with retirement?

difference between insurances

Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:

Reasons to move out of home

You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:

wishing to live independently

location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university

conflict with your parents

being asked to leave by your parents.

Issues to consider when moving out of home

It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:

Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.

Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.

Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.

Your parents may be worried

Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:

They may worry that you are not ready.

They may be sad because they will miss you.

They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.

They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.

Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.

Tips for a successful move

Tips include:

Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?

Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.

Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.

Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.

Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.

Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.

If your family home does not provide support

Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.

If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.

If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.

Where to get help

Your doctor

Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800

Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44

Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325

Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277

Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50

Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577

Things to remember

Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Don’t leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.

Draw up a realistic budget that includes ‘hidden’ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.

Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations. 

(source)

Keep me updated? xx

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Ways to learn a new language:

- trying to speak in the grammatical structure of the target language, filling in gaps with words in your native language; other person responds in the target language (start by using a cheat sheet on how to make sentences, negation, questions, cases, pronouns etc.)

- do something every day & make a plan for what to work on each day (e.g. speaking practice Monday, listening practise Tuesday, youtube video Wednesday, reading a page on Thursday...)

- index cards with key words / phrases and their translation on the other side ( go through the cards and separate them into "words I know" and "words I need to learn")

- using the index cards, try to form sentences using these words or talk about a certain topic

- labelling furniture with target language words (including articles)

- being surrounded by the language, whether you understand it or not

- watching youtube videos (e.g. cartoons, memes) in the target language

- watching films / shows with native language subtitles, then target language subtitles, then without subtitles

- connecting the experience with something positive (dopamine)

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‘am i Having A Brain Problem or Being a Shithead’: a short procrastination checklist

aka why tf am i procrastinating on The Thing (more like a flowchart, actually)

lots of people who have executive function difficulties worry about whether they’re procrastinating on a task out of laziness/simply wanting to be a jerk or mental struggles. this checklist might help you figure out which it is at any given time! (hint: it’s almost never laziness or being a jerk.) (obligatory disclaimer: this is just what works for me! something different might work better for you.)

1) do I honestly intend to start the task despite my lack of success?

yes: it’s a Brain Problem. next question

no: it’s shitty to say one thing & do another. better be honest with myself & anyone expecting me to do the task.

2) am I fed, watered, well-rested, medicated properly, etc?

yes: next question

no: guess what? this is the real next task

3) does the idea of starting the task make me feel scared or anxious?

yes: Anxiety Brain. identify what’s scaring me first.

no: next question

4) do I know how to start the task?

yes: next question

no: ADHD Brain. time to make an order of operations list.

5) do I have everything I need to start the task?

yes: next question

no: ADHD Brain lying to me about the steps again, dangit. first task is ‘gather the materials’.

6) why am i having a hard time switching from my current task to this new task?

i’m having fun doing what i’m doing: it’s okay to have fun doing a thing! if task is time-sensitive, go to next question.

i have to finish doing what i’m doing: might be ADHD brain. can I actually finish the current task or will I get trapped in a cycle? does this task really need to be finished?

the next task will be boring/boring-er than the current task: ADHD brain. re-think the next task. what would make it exciting? what am I looking forward to?

I might not have enough time to complete the task: ADHD brain wants to finish everything it starts. (if task is time-sensitive, go to next question)

i just want to make the person who asked me to do it angry: sounds like anxiety brain trying to punish itself, because I know I’ll be miserable if someone is angry at me. why do i think I deserve punishment?

no, I seriously want to piss them off: okay, i’m being a shithead

7) have I already procrastinated so badly that I now cannot finish the task in time?

yes: ADHD brain is probably caught in a guilt-perfection cycle. since I can’t have the task done on time, i don’t even want to start.

reality check: having part of a thing done is almost always better than none of a thing done. if I can get an extension, having part of it done will help me keep from stalling out until the extension deadline. i’ll feel better if I at least try to finish it.

no, there’s still a chance to finish on time: ADHD brain thinks that I have all the time in the world, but the truth is I don’t. 

reality check: if i’m having fun doing what I’m doing, I can keep doing it, but I should probably set a timer & ask someone to check on me to make sure I start doing the task later today.

8) I’ve completed the checklist and still don’t know what’s wrong!

probably wasn’t honest enough with myself. take one more look.

if I’m still mystified, ask a friend to help me talk it out.

hope this helps some of you! YOU’RE DOING GREAT SWEETIE DON’T GIVE UP ON YOU

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Do the thing.

I know you really don't wanna do it.

But it isn't gonna get better, is it?

It's lingering on your mind and dragging you down.

Just do it.

And it'll be done.

(And if it's a recurring thing: remember it gets easier. Beginning is hard. The first few times will be hard. But as you get used to it, it'll be like brushing your teeth: Necessary, part of your routine, and sometimes even pleasant.)

(Also, if time is running out: don't let yourself get paralysed by the fear of not being able to do it. You haven't even tried. If there's not enough time for all the things you have to do, just start doing them right now! Time isn't getting longer! Logical, isn't it?)

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Ten concrete tips that help me study / be productive as a procrastinator

- Sometimes I find it easier to multitask than to sit still during online lectures, but the side task has to be a "brainless" activity such as unloading the dishwasher, doing laundry, making pasta, or anything else that's automatic and still allows you to listen. It's often even easier to remember the content of e.g. an audio file or online lecture if you associate it with the image of making a toast in your head, it's like certain aspects in your memory are linked to certain movements or images (similar to the street strategy where you go for a walk and associate certain buildings with certain bits of information). Doodling helps as well, but with other tasks you get the feeling of double productivity and have more time during the day.

- Summarise texts paragraph by paragraph and write down the most important information from them so you don't have to re-read the whole text to find one important fact.

- Break your tasks down and state clearly what you need to do and how long each step will approximately take. Timetable your week (or just your day if you can't plan that far ahead) and start each task at a specific time. THEN DO NOT LEAVE YOUR TO-DO LIST UP TO INTERPRETATION OR VAGUE LIKE “DO WORK”. WHEN YOU WAKE UP, START DOING WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE FOR THE DAY. NO QUESTIONS ASKED. DO NOT GIVE YOURSELF A CHOICE. THIS IS THE PLAN.

- Got a small but annoying task to do? Do it IMMEDIATELY. Before breakfast. Before getting comfortable. With your coat still on if you just came home. You won't even notice doing it.

- If you have to do something easy that takes a little longer, like hoovering, cleaning, copying a text into your notebook, cutting paper into smaller pieces, or clicking the ad button 100 times to get free cash on FishLive, you can either listen to music while doing it or set a timer/microwave/kettle/oven and see how fast you can do it. Little chunks are the most helpful, e.g. set a timer for 30 seconds to 1 minute and see how much you can get done during that time. Then set another one, and another one, and another one. Soon it will be done.

- Start small: Say "I will work on this for 5 minutes". (Or if you have an event later in the day that can serve as a "deadline": tell yourself you'll work until e.g. your boyfriend gets home.) That way it doesn't seem overwhelming at first but gets you in the zone. Chances are you'll want to finish once you've started. And if not, try again later / tomorrow.

- If you can, set a specific time for each task if you have several ones. That way you won't be doing one task and feeling guilty about not doing another. There will be a time for everything. You can't do everything all at once, or you'll end up doing nothing.

- If you're stuck on an essay because one word is difficult or you don't know how to phrase the next sentence, do another paragraph first. Stuck on an exam question? Do another question first! Mark it as incomplete, and even if that one sentence remains incomplete in the end because time ran out, at least it didn't keep you from writing entirely.

- Split each task into segments / categories, for example: "unpack boxes" sounds overwhelming and vague. "Sort through boxes and categorise items by: memories / art / rubbish" makes more sense and gives you a pointer where to start (in this case: start by marking three areas on the floor for memories / art / rubbish). For an essay, you can aim for a certain word count, topic, paragraph, or chapter each day. That way you'll remember to take breaks while still feeling like you finished something and are making progress. And you'll have an overview of how long it's gonna take if you work on it consistently every day, which will make it easier to get into a routine.

-If you consistently fail to motivate yourself to start a task, take one step now to prepare everything for the task. For example, if you can't bring yourself to watch that lecture - have the tab open on your laptop, so when you start it up in the morning, it'll be there and all you have to do is click Play. If you have trouble going outside, lay out your clothes for the next day so that hurdle is out of the way. If you don't like cleaning your room, put large bits of rubbish away first so you only have to take them to the bin.

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Old price tags can be used as holders for pictures / moodboards that you want to attach to the wall with a nail instead of blutack. If there wasn't a pretty ribbon / piece of string on the price tag, use some decorative tape or ribbon.

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A toilet paper roll as a hairband holder

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3 life hacks:

Wake up early. It makes a difference to get things done in daylight and then still have some time to chill!

Do things while you wait for other things (laundry, microwave, food in the oven...) and challenge yourself on how much you can get done. Use the 30/30 app or a regular timer if you don't have any "waiting" tasks right now.

Plan in a set timespan per day for necessities, e.g. 10 minutes of cleaning, 30 minutes of cooking, 30 minutes of self care. If you miss it one day, no problem. But it should be a rule.

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