I'm neither suicidal nor sad, I'm just a little kitten with no name, meow
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what is your favourite season?
when nature awakes, and flowers're in bloom
beautiful songs are sung by the birds
gorgeous spring, the light of the moon
is giving its charms, during evening walks
or time of the year when everything's green
and nice smelling flowers grow everywhere
everyday holds the beauty you've never seen
summer feels like earnest mother's care
or maybe it's fall, with yellow and red
hot chocolate, duvet, and rain is falling
when the sun shines and you still in the bed
so much worm feeling are forming
or beautiful winter, when everything's bright
you gaze at the red cheeks of your lover
it's dark, in the light you see snowflakes flies
new year with family along with your friends
I love all and every one of them.
Life is beautiful and you are
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"never met a wise man, if so it's a woman"
- Kurt Cobain, territorial pissings
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I think that day has come
day when I can't sleep at night
when I shiver and I cry
and have nobody on my side
and when we see each other
that one final last time
please don't think of me
cause I'm a liar and a thief
all I've got are my last cigs
anxiety is eating me
never think of me in good light
'cause all my life is one big lie
'cause I'm harmless when alone
with no one by my side
- your dear nobody
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come and take me
take all things that I posses and not
don't be shy feel free
you don't have a single thought
spread my legs and try to choke me
you'll impress your friends
don't forget to have a smoke
after all that mess
later people say I'm guilty
all my clothes were open
and you are really pitty
you can go like nothing's happen
you can do this things again
"oh it's all nature it's not bad"
but my father tells I'm whore
they'll blame me, but what's for
you can do this things aggain
and be fine, 'cause you are man
- your dear nobody
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What a nice day
Every day is the day full of exciting events
It's the song of the birds, the wind in your hair
Voices and laughter of friends
It's fine dining on your table made by your mom or your dad, or a mate
It's all the nice compliments that you, have ever get
The eyes of people you loved their voices and their support
The art that you've made the songs you will never forget
The voice of your mom, her love and her care, her kiss is so soft...
Worm bubble bath, a bunch of sad songs, you have been thinking about your past
And now you're laying in there, your veins cut, for long you won't last
Blood slowly mixing with water, in only 10 minutes you will be dead
On the next day nobody noticed, they're all thinking you are just sad,
You need some time to overthink, to think about your life
It's just a phase, they've said altogether, you'll get over, and then you will strive...
A few days after you died, they've found you, found you razor, found your note... to your younger self?
They took it, gave to your mom and she read it, all to herself:
"Dear me, I'm so sorry,
I wish you never had to experience this.
I wish you've found a little more strength to get over.
Oh child, I'm so fucking sorry, please.
I wish you've never imagined you dead.
I wish you'd found at least one, really good friend.
I'm sorry again, sorry for letting this happen to you,
Sorry for not being here when you needed, sorry for losing you.
Wish You understand how much You love mum, how much You love me,
The world is beautiful, yet you can't see.
I wanted to say sorry to mum, for letting her see what I became,
For letting her read every word that I wrote, the sentences I've never meant to say.
And now there you go, my soul left my body,
The only thing that I've left is the signature
- your dear nobody"
She bursts up in tears, she shakes and she reads
Again and again and again and again
The paper is wet from her tears
She blames it on herself, she thinks it's all was her fault,
But I think it's mine
Yet I didn't manage to survive
To say, how bad she was wrong...
Your little sibling today went to school, they still can't believe you're dead
They still do not talk, do not eat, and cry in their bad
Still to this day your favourite pet waits for you to return
But at least not today, they'll proceed staring at the door
And now you understand how massively you have been wrong
How many people care, you've ruined your life and it's all your fault
You lay 6 feet deep and against your believe
Somebody cared, somebody grieved...
- your dear nobody
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I'm sorry for being too pussy, I promise I'll be better
- your dear nobody
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I wish you knew how to hate me so i don't have to chase you
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moth
can't wait to get stabbed in the back
can't wait to stop hurting myself
physically or emotionally
it all hurts the same
like a moth that tries to get close to a candle
and then burns to death
- your dear nobody
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your eyes
when I see sunshine
reflecting from your eyes
I lose ability to speak
I sure hope that you will be fine
that you're not sick and feeling nice
you're my world, and I am in it just a freak
when I hear just a single word
and see the movement of your lips
oh I would sing you my own song
if it weren't for my shaky fingertips
- your dear nobody
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it's all you
so now it's time to say
to say what's in my head
but all these thoughts are the only way
to cope with what I have
these voices in my head, they'll kill me
for better or for worse
but please I just want you to leave me
yes it would hurt, so please do it with force
you are the only thing that makes me wanna live
you are the one who makes me feel alive
yet you're the one who makes me grieve
to feel that I cannot survive
oh my dear, you're the light, you're the sun
with you I've learned to love my life
to love the rain, to love the sky
yes, you made me wanna strive
yet now I want to end up dead
to not wake up, to kill myself
to be alone, to be forgotten
yet to be loved and to be wanted
- your dear nobody
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learned to talk
the only problems that I have, are all inside my head
the fact that I can't talk, the fact that I am sad
when I'm alone I overthink, for hours straight
and after those years I finally understand
when I was young I learned to walk
I learned to say the words
but didn't learned to talk
- your dear nobody
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thoughts
I can remember this pleasant night
it felt to me like it all was alright
but now, that I replay it back in my mind
I think it was awful and stupid
the lines that I said with the mouth of mine
even though I thought it was fine
looking at you I saw your spectacular smile
yet here I am unable to rhyme
hate this feeling that I always had
when in the morning I wanna be dead
or when this voice inside of my head
tries to convince me that they are my friend
but no I hate them, they make me feel bad
especially when I lay in my bed
hundreds of words that they have said
they all make me feel so fucking upset
- your dear nobody
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路
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Personal sunrise
So I've got us tickets for stars staring competition
We're gonna win it together, you and me
We'll win money, and pay for your tuition
Please don't forget, my time for you is free
You're my will to live, Your laugh's my only strive
I'll buy your favorite ice cream and tell you as a surprise
That you're my world, I'll love you all my life
And then we gonna meet our personal sunrise
- your dear nobody
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Truth that they deceive
It feels like truth that they decieve
They try to tell me that they love me
I want to, but I can't believe
They talk with everyone besides me
Oh it's hard for me to leave
So yeah I'm jealous
Jealous of not having friends
Jealous of not talking
Feels like I just need some meds
I am dead man walking
They're having fun without me
They spend their time together
Yet I'm not invited to the party
All I hear is words in air
That phrases: "oh you're great",
"oh you look good, and you're good friend"
But please don't lie and tell me straight
That's all just a means to an end
- your dear nobody
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Thoughts of mine
I've never thought that I'm capable to love
I've never thought that I can be myself
I've never thought that I can make somebody laugh
All I'm capable of doing is waiting for somebody's help
At least that's what I thought
And now I understand that I was right
I'll never touch your skin, so beautiful and soft
I've lost that first and only fight
And with it I've lost the war
I thought that I got rid of thoughts about you
But when I see a face that's similar to yours
I loose my mind, and at that moment all I want is to...
Is to see the sky line at the sunrise and feel remorse
- your dear nobody
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I love the fact that my birthday is in summer
Throughout all my school and uni years, almost nobody has ever wished me "happy birthday"
And I always knew how little to no friends I have
- your dear nobody
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