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Well that’s fucking ridiculous! Of course she would’ve fallen for someone else if her life was completely different! She would be a different person! She would need different things from a partner!

And I definitely wouldn’t say she’s emotionally stunted! If anything she’s way more emotionally mature than she should be for her age! Sure her maturity progressed very differently than what we consider “normal” but that doesn’t mean it’s a problem or that it’s less than. It’s actually fucking better! How do people not understand that this woman is infinitely superior to everyone on this earth!

I always laugh at antis who say Padmé choosing Anakin is a result of how stunted she is in emotional growth and argue that if she grew up normally, she would’ve fallen in love with someone better.

I need the deluded nation to start being for real.

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May want to check it again, I think something may have gone wrong

AO3 emails are currently delayed. No data has been lost: emails will still be delivered, just behind schedule. You may also get some duplicate emails. Thank you for bearing with us!

Posted: 18:52 UTC July 27, 2025

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Nah, the boys have a lot of unexplored potential and lore so I get it, the real issue is when people only care about the girls (Zoey and Mira more than Rumi) in relation to how they can be shipped with the boys.

Like, everyone latched onto the ships from in-movie fans even though it literally doesn’t make any sense without some serious character development and just smushed Zoey with Mystery and Mira with Abby and Romance. And there are like no fics where both bands interact or reconcile or redeem or whatever you want to call it, where Zoey and Mira get to be their own characters without one of the boys.

Yes, Mira and Zoey were horny on main for these guys, but they weren’t actually interested in them, as the movie proved very well with those executions. Honestly they’d probably be embarrassed or awkward that now they can’t ‘thirst over the pretty boys with 0 repercussions because they’ll never see them again/be dead soon anyway.’

I just hate that the meaningless thirst somehow got turned into character traits. Exploring the Saja Boys as characters who were underutilized is totally valid, using that to also work on world building is also valid. Erasing the entire personalities and histories of the girls so they can be shipped with the Saja Boys is not.

The Huntr/x girls got a lot of screen time and development, so less fics and discussions and theories are needed, that doesn’t mean people don’t appreciate them.

I had this thought as I started watching K-pop demon hunters that it would be very interesting to bring in gender discrimination from fanbases by having the demon boys be just fine next to Huntrix who continually puts out bangers. However, that didn't happen in the movie and in fact it was a way more equal battle of cunning and talent. THE REAL LIFE FANS however latched onto these pretty boys with practically zero characterization (other than the face they put on for the public) and all I see scrolling through the tag is Saja boys this Saja boys that. This was such a wonderful movie about loving yourself shown through some really accurate and good depictions of young girls. I guess all I'm really getting at is it's disappointing that even though we finally have some well characterized female characters, people still prefer the pretty boys. Someone can probably say this better than I am.

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Ok so I have 2 responses to this

1. Thank you! I have been wondering about the actual reason for her voice loss and this is a really comprehensive explanation and makes a lot more sense!

2. Well… now I know why I can’t sing and haven’t been able to sing most of my life and why I was worse when I was actually working with a voice coach. Anxiety! Of course even this is the fucking anxiety.

Why did Rumi lose her voice here?

Rumi, as a vocalist, is committing several important mistakes, which lead to sudden loss of voice, coughing and/or "rattling". The voice actor has done it all on purpose, which proves their incredible control over the whole vocal apparatus. Respect.👌

No, Rumi didn't lose her voice because of the demonic blood. The marks spreading was just another symptom of the main reason for her loss of voice. And the name of the culprit is: Stress. Which leads to:

1. Loss of control over the diaphragm, back, shoulder and neck muscles. Singing is like building: to grasp a really high note, you must have a very stable "foundation", formed by your tense abdomen and back muscles under shoulder blades. Once you start thinking not about the song, losing your head in the clouds, you lose this ab tension even for a moment - poof - the note is gone and you're coughing like a Monty Python peasant, like we see in the beginning of the video.

There is a way to fix it (and it's not grape juice XD). Ab workout and push-ups. You can just turn to a wall and sing the phrase doing wall push-ups. I've heard Miley Cyrus practices a daily vocal routine right on a treadmill, but it sounds a bit extreme to me. Anyway, it's a bit strange that Bobby didn't yell "Hey, what's going on with your core, take a proper breath and sit on your diaphragm muscles!" XD because taking a rest only will Not fix it.

2. While stress makes us lose control over our bodies, it also makes some of our muscles constantly unnecessary tense. Like a part of our diaphragm (to me, it's right under the solar plexus), which sort of prevents us from taking a proper breath, makes it sharp. This gives an illusion of our core not having enough space, tenses our neck and back muscles way too much, which makes us want to push too much air through our vocal cords at once, which leads to coughing and voice rattling (somewhere around 00:50 in the video). Can be improved by 10 minutes of pilates or breathing with a heavy book on your abdomen.

3. Improper oral cavity position. Tense tongue is also the reason for voice rattling. When you're really stressed, your tongue flexes and forms an "arch", closing your larynx, preventing the sound's liberation and guides it where it shouldn't be (back at your throat, stuck in the mouth, going up through the nose, etc). To make a note full, you need to relax your tongue and make it flat (which Rumi does only when she gets mad, lol, because that's how our vocal apparatus naturally works. If you fail to feel the proper sound, you need to get really angry, and you'll notice the difference.)

Rumi also makes her voice so full and thick thanks to making the vowels a bit round, like in academic vocals. Which is really cool but... It doesn't work with really high notes!!! In K-pop, like in every pop singing, you pronounce every word "with a smile". Aka, you open your mouth to say "A" and you say "O"; you lift and stretch your upper lip, pulling the corners of your mouth outward. Rumi can't take that note at first, and why? Because she doesn't feel like smiling.

4. It's really important not only to control your micro-mimics as a vocalist, but also to be psychologically happy and satisfied with your current state. Only emotionally stable, experienced in life people, confident in themselves and in those close to them, or people who have nothing to lose, can sing a happy, energetic song when they feel like crying cause the world is falling apart. When you sing, it's 10 times harder to hide your true feelings.

Obviously, if your job is to kill someone everyday, it will overstrain unnecessary muscles and make your blood pure cortisol, which will have a huge negative effect on your vocal apparatus. In fact, combining daily deadly combat with public singing is not a great idea for someone who doesn't udergo daily psychotherapy. For Rumi, it was just a matter of time when such an insane routine would lower her immunity, leading to demonic birth marks spread. Still, she could have had it way worse. She could have gotten viral laryngitis. Now, that would be deadly for the new release.

For Rumi, as someone with a lot of money, it would not hurt to do monthly blood test check-ups. Maybe, a week or two with B group vitamins would lower her stress.

Proper nutrition, proper sleep, proper physical activity and, of course, proper psychological support are the foundation for our mental and physical health. If there's a lack of any of them - no magic pill will help. Sometimes, constant stress makes us lose control over all of these four aspects, dragging us to this neverending cycle of worsening. You need to stop for a moment to be kind and truthful to yourself.

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For a self proclaimed hater you are very reasonable and polite! I totally get not liking how s4 went, I definitely didn’t think it was perfect and honestly I thought Fivela was great way before they became canon and didn’t necessarily like how the writers went about it (as if they needed every excuse and justification they could think of instead of it happening naturally). Anyway that’s not the point of this post, I just had to comment on it. Thanks for not attacking my opinions!

And you do bring up a very interesting scenario that I hadn’t considered. Delores becoming a real person in an alternate timeline… I doubt it was ever in the cards, but even if it did happen it wouldn’t really be Delores, just someone who looks how Five imagined her, maybe with a similar personality even, but not the connection to Five. He would be drawn in by the thought of her being real but ultimately realize that the kind of relationship he wanted wasn’t truly possible between entirely separate individuals. It’s certainly an interesting idea to explore.

Also, super glad you put into words what I’d been thinking, that she’s actually the parts of himself that lose, the doubts and the compassion and irrational feelings that balance out his recklessness and callous pragmatism and occasionally defeatist mentality. I think she amplified those things that he needed to maintain balance, but perhaps her existence dulled or muted those feelings and thoughts in Five himself, until he make that choice to return her to the department store. I think that was a very important character building scene for him, even if people treat it like a joke.

Ok I’m rambling now, I should stop I need to go to sleep soon…

So, this is just a general observation, but the majority of the Umbrella Academy fandom seems to regard Delores in one of two ways: as a joke, or as a valid and healthy coping mechanism/relationship.

And I am extremely confused and concerned to be honest.

Because to me that looks like a manifestation of Five’s narcissism combined with a very strange flavor of dissociative identity disorder. Delores is a part of Five’s consciousness. She is literally just him but projected onto a mannequin. This is not a relationship or a silly coping mechanism. It may have saved him when he was stuck in the apocalypse, but once he rejoins society it’s a serious issue that causes him to distance himself from other people and rely solely on himself when he doesn’t have to. It also hinders his ability to communicate, since the only “person” he’s comfortable talking to is actually just him, knows everything he knows, and doesn’t need him to verbally explain his thought process in detail to give useful advice or interject their own opinion. And it really shows in how he communicates with others, which is to say not at all. If that situation was addressed earlier, if he was forced to confront the fact that Delores isn’t a separate entity but a part of him, and that his siblings don’t instantly know what he’s thinking or doing, things probably would’ve gone a lot smoother.

Anyway yeah. Sorry for the rant, this has been bugging me. (And yes I am saying that Five’s a bit of a Narcissist. He’s not a full Narcissist but the guy is literally in love with himself and believes he’s always right. So.)

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I wouldn’t say she’s the best parts of himself, more like the parts of himself that he needs when he’s talking to her. And she is quite literally a figment of his own mind, and there’s no outside influence on her. She can only think things that Five can. Maybe she has different priorities but she’s still him.

And no it is NOT better than Five and Lila. They are peak time travel romance, emphasis on time travel. Neither of them looks their age. If your beef with the ship is about the actors ages instead of the characters you need to do more research on their opinions. Both of them are quite proud of the scenes they did together and wish more of it was included in the Final Cut. Five and Lila’s relationship was real, healthy, and built on mutual respect and understanding. That is so much healthier than projecting what you think your ideal partner could be like onto an inanimate object. Honestly this idea is what prompted me to write this post in the first place. People thinking that Five should have ended up with Dolores instead of Lila?! I was absolutely appalled, not just at the Fivela dissing, but at the incredibly ignorant belief that Dolores is a person entirely separate from Five and not at all a manifestation of his severe mental instability that needed to be addressed for him to heal!

Obviously I love Fivela, but I hate the pushing for Five x Dolores more.

P.s. please don’t start an argument or debate. I don’t want to fight and the validity of Fivela isn’t up for debate with me, I know what I think about them and I’m sure you do to, let’s not push it any further than this.

So, this is just a general observation, but the majority of the Umbrella Academy fandom seems to regard Delores in one of two ways: as a joke, or as a valid and healthy coping mechanism/relationship.

And I am extremely confused and concerned to be honest.

Because to me that looks like a manifestation of Five’s narcissism combined with a very strange flavor of dissociative identity disorder. Delores is a part of Five’s consciousness. She is literally just him but projected onto a mannequin. This is not a relationship or a silly coping mechanism. It may have saved him when he was stuck in the apocalypse, but once he rejoins society it’s a serious issue that causes him to distance himself from other people and rely solely on himself when he doesn’t have to. It also hinders his ability to communicate, since the only “person” he’s comfortable talking to is actually just him, knows everything he knows, and doesn’t need him to verbally explain his thought process in detail to give useful advice or interject their own opinion. And it really shows in how he communicates with others, which is to say not at all. If that situation was addressed earlier, if he was forced to confront the fact that Delores isn’t a separate entity but a part of him, and that his siblings don’t instantly know what he’s thinking or doing, things probably would’ve gone a lot smoother.

Anyway yeah. Sorry for the rant, this has been bugging me. (And yes I am saying that Five’s a bit of a Narcissist. He’s not a full Narcissist but the guy is literally in love with himself and believes he’s always right. So.)

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Oh yeah there’s definitely an argument to be made, and I know my take isn’t fully agreed upon. And like I said, I’m not an expert or anything, I just think the whole play is taken too seriously. It’s all at once a tragedy and a comedy and a romance and I think it’s neat. The language I used probably came across more decisive and harsh than I intended, I just really wanted to bring home the absurdity of it since so many people only see the epic but tragic love. They just get all “oooo that’s the purest love, they place their love for each other over their families and then over life itself!” which is admittedly compelling, but that’s all they see.

I’m not saying the entire thing is a comedy, it’s not always funny and it is genuinely tragic, but people have misrepresented it so much that the idea of it has become entirely separate from the actual text. Not to mention how the family feud has as much importance to the plot as the romance and they aren’t even involved in a lot of that part.

I love how you mentioned how some stories are universal though, because that’s definitely true, and the concept of star crossed lovers has been among them as far back as we know. The Weaver and the Cowherd and The Butterfly Lovers from Chinese mythology, Pyramus and Thisbe, and many other mythological examples have much purer and older examples of the theme. I just think that Shakespeare’s own version of it had an element of satire and sarcasm and most people just didn’t catch on because of his ridiculously hard to understand language. This is just my own opinion, influenced by my limited understanding of his life, circumstances, personality, and culture though, and it’s not backed by definitive evidence that I know of. Just, he married young and by the time wrote this play he probably regretted that a bit, what with being a struggling playwright with three kids and a wife he was no longer in love with, and his other… dalliances.

Anyway yeah, I totally get your point here, I just don’t think Romeo and Juliet are a good comparison for Anidala.

someone should do a diagram about the intersection of people who think that anakin and padmé didn't really love each other and the ones who say romeo and juliet wasn't a love story

[valenteal]

So, this is just a general observation, but the majority of the Umbrella Academy fandom seems to regard Delores in one of two ways: as a joke, or as a valid and healthy coping mechanism/relationship.

And I am extremely confused and concerned to be honest.

Because to me that looks like a manifestation of Five’s narcissism combined with a very strange flavor of dissociative identity disorder. Delores is a part of Five’s consciousness. She is literally just him but projected onto a mannequin. This is not a relationship or a silly coping mechanism. It may have saved him when he was stuck in the apocalypse, but once he rejoins society it’s a serious issue that causes him to distance himself from other people and rely solely on himself when he doesn’t have to. It also hinders his ability to communicate, since the only “person” he’s comfortable talking to is actually just him, knows everything he knows, and doesn’t need him to verbally explain his thought process in detail to give useful advice or interject their own opinion. And it really shows in how he communicates with others, which is to say not at all. If that situation was addressed earlier, if he was forced to confront the fact that Delores isn’t a separate entity but a part of him, and that his siblings don’t instantly know what he’s thinking or doing, things probably would’ve gone a lot smoother.

Anyway yeah. Sorry for the rant, this has been bugging me. (And yes I am saying that Five’s a bit of a Narcissist. He’s not a full Narcissist but the guy is literally in love with himself and believes he’s always right. So.)

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Ehhhh… I’m a huge Anidala shipper but I still don’t believe Romeo and Juliet was a tragic romance, but a comedy in disguise.

I’m honestly pretty uncomfortable when people compare the two. A little backstory, my Dad is a drama nerd, I’m a drama nerd, I grew up learning Shakespeare in bits, and when I was in middle school I played Juliet for one section of the play (of course since it’s middle school and everyone needed a role it was divided up). I would say that I’m decently educated in this play even if I haven’t studied it in depth as much as I’d like. Still, big Shakespeare fan, played Juliet, did a fair number of scene analysis, as well as an analysis of the overall plot. Seen it performed multiple times. I know Romeo and Juliet, and I’m not unfamiliar with his other works either.

Romeo and Juliet is a Tragicomedy, a good clue to how Shakespeare intended for it to be viewed appears in one of his other plays, A Midsummer Night’s Dream (a blatant comedy), when some of the characters within the play are putting on their own play. One of them suggests an opening prologue (like the one in Romeo and Juliet) and the whole concept is mocked.

Anyway, in the beginning of the play Romeo is helplessly pining for a totally different girl, waxing poetic about her just as intensely as he does Juliet. He’s a few years older than Juliet, she’s just reached the age where marriage talks are starting to be held, there are already interested parties, and she’s been somewhat sheltered. She meets her first attractive and eligible boy right after having a conversation about marrying her off, and so infatuation bloomed. They barely knew each other, they were just young and stupid (as they prove with their multiple reckless and dangerous meetings). They were overcome by teenage infatuation and hormones, as well as social pressures to get married.

The play makes fun of family feuds that persist for no reason, fleeting teenage romance that kids overinflated the importance of, and the general dumb assery of rich people. It’s not true love, it’s a comedy.

The entire plot was “Two kids started dating and both their families went crazy and now everyone’s DEAD!” It’s funny in a really sad way.

Anidala on the other hand, may have some surface similarities, but the connection is so much deeper and shit goes down years after they married, not before they even got the chance. Anakin and Padmé also never tried to run away like Romeo and Juliet did, which was what ultimately led to their deaths.

Anyway my point is, Anidala is a much better ship than Romeo and Juliet. Anakin and Padmé are madly in love, Romeo and Juliet are just dumb, desperate kids.

someone should do a diagram about the intersection of people who think that anakin and padmé didn't really love each other and the ones who say romeo and juliet wasn't a love story

[valenteal]

Did Five love Lila before the subway?

Well, this is a question only he knows the answer to, but today I found myself reflecting on a few scenes, and I want to share my thoughts and observations with you...

Season 2

At first, Five pretty much ignored Lila, seeing her merely as Diego's girlfriend from the mental hospital. Later, he sensed she might be lying about who she really was. In the scene where she saves him from the Swede, his expression clearly shows he’s surprised. I think that’s the moment she genuinely caught his attention—for the first time. Of course, his caution won out, and he kept an even closer eye on her. Still, I believe this was a pivotal moment.

During their first fight, Five was clearly the superior one and could have won easily. However, his triumphant gaze at her held something else: he was enjoying it. I think he found her challenging and intriguing, which drew him in.

Five bluntly tells Diego the truth about Lila, even though he sees how hurt Diego is. He throws it in his face, emphasizing that he himself is the reason they got together (more on this in Season 3).

The second fight is far more intense, with Lila determined to kill him. At this point, Five likely believed she was just another tool of the Handler and saw her as a threat he’d eliminate if necessary.

When he learns the truth about her parents, his reaction shows genuine shock. He realizes she has personal, valid reasons for targeting him. This revelation shifts his perspective; from this point, I believe he no longer truly wants to harm her.

Season 3

When Five discovers Lila has returned, she’s the only one he wants to partner with. Yes, he values her skills, but was that the only reason? I think he also wanted her company.

The bathroom scene is a chapter of its own. He must have known she was still angry with him. In this fight, it feels like Five is more focused on defending himself than actually attacking her. When Lila calls it off, he stops immediately and engages with her about the situation. This scene feels like a way to clear the air between them. And honestly, barging into someone’s bathroom isn’t exactly normal behavior—he was really asking for it. And that stance of his while talking to her? Well…

Later, when they argue, Five tells her Diego probably truly loves her. This moment stands out. Was he doing it for Diego? I don’t think so. He likely suspected "her son" might be part of her revenge plan, but why bring up Diego’s feelings? In Season 2, he didn’t seem interested in matchmaking for Diego. Could it have been for himself? To stop Lila from leaving later? Perhaps he knew the only reason she might stay was Diego.

Five understands that, because of her parents, Diego, and his own age issue, he didn’t stand a chance with her at that time. If she left, he might never see her again (I doubt he guessed she was pregnant). Reconciling her with Diego was likely the only way to keep her around. Or perhaps reflecting his own (burgeoning / unacknowledged) feelings?

At the Commission, when Lila leaves the bunker, Five glances at her in a way that suggests he doesn’t want the world to end—partly because that would mean losing her, too.

Later on, it's just small moments, but still iconic, like their dance and the apparent shift towards a truce between them.

Season 4

After six years, we don’t know much about how often Five and Lila saw each other. But given their somewhat normal lives, it likely happened a few times. Even though the first episode of the season makes it seem like most of the characters haven't seen each other in years, presenting some information in the style of family members interacting for the first time in years (well, it wasn't happily done).

The banter between Lila and Five persists, but there’s also trust. Once again, it’s just the two of them teaming up for a new mission. It’s clear by now that he genuinely cares about her and wants to protect her.

When Five talks to Diego about burying something deep and pouring concrete over it, it feels personal. What could he be referring to more than his soft spot for Diego’s wife? He also talks about Lila not giving up what she has - as if he had thought about it before.

He also agrees to her crazy idea. As in Season 3, he likely saw it as an opportunity to spend more time with her while solving mysteries.

And the subway? We all know. Only a blind person wouldn’t see that Five had fallen completely in love with her during those years. Despite the insane situation, he looked happier than ever. His smiles were genuine... and so were his glances at Lila.

So... When did he fall in love with Lila?

I think, It likely built up over time, like a snowball rolling downhill, starting from the very beginning. But the subway gave him the chance to fully embrace those feelings, and their greenhouse gave him the courage to act on them.

What do you think?

[valenteal]

PREACH

🚨TUA RANT🚨

hey so ummm idk if anyone out there knows this but in case some ppl are confused, the realism that mise en scène works to construct in the process of filmmaking isn’t actually real and storytelling through visual media is a whole industrial complex and professional actors are literally just workers who, in order to do their job professionally, do not feel any certain type of way about what that job entails based on your weird personal morality metrics when acting in service of the story being told.

like are any of you at all cognizant of the fact that when you see an actor portraying a character on screen it’s literally their job to not exist as that actor or the person that they are in their personal lives but instead embody the character for which they auditioned, knowing full well what that might entail? in this case having not only read the source material but already being a huge fan of it, fully aware of the nuanced, grey nature of it all??

like forgive me but if they are actually good at their job (which in this case they absolutely are) an actor shouldn’t even cross your mind as a person that exists outside of the narrative when you are watching their performance.

and are you in any way aware of the fact that with the (now very rare) exception of clearly defined lines set out by legal teams and intimacy coordinators and agents and HR being inappropriately crossed without swift repercussions, if an actor actually felt uncomfortable doing something at their job it absolutely would not go down in this day and age? and that an extremely vanilla kiss scene is not worth any semblance of hysterical hand-wringing over?

do you even realize how ridiculous it sounds when you chimp out about the fact that steve blackman has openly ‘admitted’ (as if that’s not a totally normal fucking statement to make and in no way weird or shameful or gross) that he waited until aidan was an adult with agency to give his character (who is a fucking senior citizen btw) a romantic storyline with the only character it made complete narrative sense to give him one with? this is not a “gotcha” argument it’s literally just the standard respectful thing to do… and miss me with your pearl clutching about the character’s physical age lol he’s physically like 25 by the time anything happens between them in the greenhouse.

technically the age gap goes the other way here, and honestly everyone with more than two brain cells knew the potential for this kind of thing happening given the complicated dilemmas of the character’s age. it was always going to be morally grey no matter what, and frankly, that’s what makes it compelling.

and btw, just fyi— a head writer of a multi-season tv show taking on the responsibility of planning out narrative arcs for fictional characters in very specific contexts does not, in fact, constitute what some of ya’ll so hyperbolically refer to as “fantasizing” about a fully consenting paid actor potentially being assigned a tastefully portrayed romantic storyline with another fully consenting paid ADULT actor who happened to be a ‘physical minor’ 15 years younger than them at the time (many years prior) that both parties were hired for the job, which they individually pursued with enthusiasm to obtain.

i’m sorry but there is nothing being logically presented by anyone whining about this that adequately proves there is anything wrong with it other than a personally biased laundry list of wildly reaching assumptions with zero concrete evidence and a whole lot of baseless projections.

like…you people do understand that all of these actors are doing their jobs and it’s not that deep right?? kissing, especially to the mild extent that was depicted in tua s4e5, is just like any other task in an actor’s job description, and all they are worried about is doing it in a way that best represents the characters in the context of the story that they are being paid quite handsomely to portray, which they contractually agreed upon and willingly consented to do.

not to mention the fact that if you would just take several deep breaths and get your head out of the ass of your moral high-horse for five minutes, you would notice that these actors did an absolutely phenomenal job at selling every single minute aspect of this storyline despite the fact that the amount of work they put in was drastically cut down to literal shreds by the final edit.

but no, y’all judgemental creeps rly out here having the audacity to disrespect the blood, sweat, and tears of the labour they put into it…which they have gone on record saying they are extremely proud of btw:

claiming concern for the wellbeing of people you don’t even know through deluded, sanctimonious takedowns of their hard work that they are (rightfully) proud of is absolutely wild to me… it’s giving vipers dressed in empath’s clothing lmao be so fucking for real please.

there is zero real harm to anyone actually occurring here, so pls stop pretending like your paternalistic moral panic is protecting anything other than your idealistic fantasy of how everything you consume should cater to your specific preferences, remain unchanging and safely free from the discomforts of growth, and never challenge your naïve perception of reality or your disney-ass assumptions that all media should exist as a utopian escape from it.

children… i beg you to put the ipads down and run your needlessly worried fingers through some actual physical grass i am so fucking serious. please grow the fuck up—for your own mental peace but also out of respect for the peace of those around you.

and to all you cyberbullying weirdos out there—fivela enjoyers auto-block hysterical commenters like these not out of cowardice but out of having the maturity to know when to pick your battles, and the unfortunate knowledge that attempting to reason with a certain level of reactionary willful ignorance is a waste of ones precious time and energy.

i have (probably foolishly) made an exception in this instance, bc for better or for worse, i felt that there are simply too many extremely loud voices out here who could do with being told to pipe the fuck down for 5 seconds.

it costs literally $0.00 to mind your goddamn business, stay in your lane, and focus on you and what makes you happy. if you feel the need to define yourself based on what you hate more than what you love, then i would highly suggest having a long eye-opening convo with yourself about why that is. let people enjoy things that nobody is forcing you to enjoy along with them. filter functions exist for this very reason.

it is nobody’s fault but your own if your media illiterate asses completely misunderstood the assignment and utterly failed to read the room here. like i’m sorry you put your rose-tinted hopes and dreams into something that never pretended to be anything but what it was and not what your narcissistic projections wanted it to be. tough shit. step into the daylight and let it go babes.

i didn’t want to do this but i got fucking fed up and needed to clock the tea one time. i will never speak on this again here but i’m sorry it needed to be said.

i wish a very get well soon 💖 to you all and to all a girl, bye.

[valenteal]

I think how Lila acquires her bracelets is very telling.

With the first one, the one Diego made at the mental hospital, she sneakily took it without his knowledge, representing the deceptive nature of their relationship. He’s her mark and she’s on a mission. She ties herself to him without him even realizing, tricks him into keeping her by his side, first for the sake of her mission and then because she’s so starved for honest affection that she latches onto him and his family the only way she knows how. Diego had no intent, the bracelet was something he happened to have, and Lila swooped it up and refused to take it off.

The second bracelet we never see, it’s only mentioned. This one Diego bought for Valentine’s Day, and Lila traded it for a vacuum. The fact that it was for Valentine’s Day shows how the gesture is rooted in obligation more than a genuine gesture of love. It was expensive, but not heartfelt. In fact it was too expensive. At this point in her life Lila doesn’t need jewelry, she needs the tools and time to be a good homemaker, and their financial situation isn’t the greatest. This obligatory gift is not a sign of Diego’s appreciation, but of his thoughtlessness and his lack of understanding of her. She needed a vacuum and he went and blew a ton of money on a meaningless bracelet.

The third bracelet is the one she received from Five. He made it, crafted it with care, specifically for her, he chose a difficult material to work with and find, something precious, he poured his love into this little band so that she knew how grateful he was to have her with him, how much he loved her. He knew that she used to wear a handmade bracelet to signify her commitment to her lover so he made her one. He was caring and observant and thoughtful, everything Diego wasn’t.

[valenteal]

Once again super late to the party on a popular show I just got around to.

The Umbrella Academy! Great show, I honestly loved it. And I mean all of it.

Look, I’m a time travel nerd ok, so for me, any show involving time travel has to be viewed with a LOT of suspension of disbelief, otherwise I start picking apart the mechanics of it all until the entire thing falls apart. I went into this show with the understanding that it wasn’t going to make sense, but it will be entertaining and explore the reality of messy relationships and family dynamics.

I really liked how they didn’t sugar coat the interactions between the characters, sometimes they go too far and seriously hurt each other. Sometimes it’s ugly and there’s not a satisfying reconciliation. Sometimes things get messy and everyone is wrong or everyone is right. Sometimes the character’s emotions won’t cooperate and conform to a prescribed narrative.

And it’s really surprising to me that people are complaining about “plot holes” and “it doesn’t make sense” in season 4 because hello that’s the foundation of the story!

And the fact that anyone was surprised by Five and Lila is just… mind boggling. Like, that was being set up since season two y’all. Idk if it was totally conscious or agreed upon, but that love triangle was glaringly obvious to me. If there’s anything I am upset about concerning their relationship it’s that it took so damn long. And that is started after they had somewhat settled down. And that it was only excusable once they were completely and totally alone for years. There were definitely valid reasons not to add it until Aidan was an adult, but they definitely could have introduced that sub plot earlier, maybe then people wouldn’t be so vehemently opposed to it. Because it makes sense and honestly Diego and Lila’s relationship was never gonna last. It always felt forced by physical attraction and Lila’s loneliness. She latched onto Diego and then they did everything they thought was expected of people who are in love without stopping to actually question “hey, do I really think I could spend my life with this person without going mad?” Which is an extremely important question to ask when having kids and getting married.

Lila was always lying to Diego, in a way she never was with Five. Maybe it could have stayed platonic or familial, but there was always a deeper connection between them. They were the only ones who shared the very unique experience of being a time traveling assassin groomed by The Handler. While their goals didn’t always align, while they didn’t always trust or like each other, they still thought the same way.

So yeah, Lila and Five getting closer was definitely not a surprise. And I personally didn’t think season 4 was a shit show. It was admittedly rushed, but I thought it had as much logical progression as all the other seasons.

(Btw Lila is my favorite character if you couldn’t tell. I root for her happiness, not Diego’s or Five’s. They’re assholes, she’s a boss.)

[valenteal]

Ok but that Mae v Osha fight scene must’ve been a nightmare to film and edit now that I’m thinking about it.

[valenteal]

Ok but “The Moon Will Sing” by The Crane Wives is extremely Osha, Sol, and Qimir coded, right?

[valenteal]

Oh I totally acknowledge that my emotions are influencing my judgement, but I also believe in the validity of emotions in decision making, so I won’t apologize for that. And I agree the unhealthy relationship is not solely Kunikida’s fault, I have talked about Dazai’s toxicity many times. I just really do believe that if I met Kunikida in real life I would absolutely despise him, and for good reason. Despite his ideals being rigid his morals are flexible. He’s incredibly traditional and I am pretty put off by his ideal woman fantasy, because that just reads as sexist and objectifying. Other people can like him all they want, he’s undoubtedly a very interesting character, he’s just also everything I don’t like in people. Uncompromising, assured of his own moral superiority, overbearing, judgmental, quick to violence. He has good traits too, I’m not saying he’s evil. But he’s definitely a Character with a Personality. A personality I find incredibly distasteful. I don’t judge you for liking him, he’s just not my cup of tea.

Kunikida is an asshole tho right? I’m not the only one who genuinely doesn’t like him right? Dazai brush it off and makes it seem like playful banter but the way Kunikida treats him is abusive and unlike pretty much every other instance of abuse in this series it’s happened in a legitimate business that actually try’s to be moral. It isn’t the norm or what’s expected. It is not ok to strangle your co-worker just because they’re being annoying. And the show actually said the bandage squandering machine comment actually hurt Dazai. Not to mention the way he responded to Atsushi’s kidnapping or just Kyouka in general. He has good intentions and he’s a good person but he’s inflexible in the worst way. In his attempt to balance his idealism and his pragmatism he created rigid conditions to determine when a situation was worth his time or attention. Because he acknowledges that he can’t help everybody he decided to do his absolute best at the agency and to help people only if it’s for the agency. He doesn’t do things for people. He does them for his ideals. He didn’t want to help when Atsushi was kidnapped, he wasn’t willing to help Kyouka, and he didn’t join the others in avenging the coffee man. He has little to no loyalty to anyone else, his loyalty is to his ideals and thus to himself.

The thing that really made me realize how bad he is is a scene from 55 minutes that no one seems to talk about. Right after Dazai literally dies and is brought back to life only through a lot of luck and planning this happens:

“‘… Now I’ll have to come up with a new plan to kill myself. But—’

‘DAZAAAAAAI’

‘Oof?!’

Kunikida drop-kicked Dazai from the side, nearly breaking him in two and sending him flying to the ground.

‘HOW… MANY TIMES… ARE YOU GOING TO… SCREW UP THE JOB… BECAUSE YOU CAN’T SIT STILL?!?! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH… WE HAD TO GO THROUGH… TO BRING YOU BACK TO LIFE…?!?!’

‘Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! Kunikida, please stop kicking and choking and yelling at me!’

‘The hell are you talking about?! ‘Finally managed to die’? You’re no longer human! You don’t deserve that right! If you really want to die that much, I’ll kill you myself!…’”

See this really pisses me off. Dazai was stabbed and he bled out. He died. Yosano was only able to save him when he was in a limbo between life and death, during the half a second between his heart starting again and his blood actually reaching his brain. Her ability, despite what some people seem to think, isn’t perfect. It isn’t a magical cure all in an instant. She has to work at it, use it multiple times. She used her ability on Junichiro 4 times. She could only heal Dazai for a fraction of a second. He wasn’t better. He was just not actively dying. And Kunikida goes and beats him up. Dazai actually asked him to stop. He doesn’t usually do that. He was actually in pain and making truly concerning remarks about his suicidal ideation. And the no longer human comment? Saying Dazai doesn’t deserve to feel the way he does? That’s one of Dazai’s deepest insecurities and Kunikida says it like it’s nothing. That’s a really shitty thing to do.

And considering previous things in the book, we do know that Kunikida isn’t happy with Dazai. This isn’t just worry manifesting in anger. He was mad at Dazai before this happened. He was forcibly reminded of Dazai’s history and his willingness to do terrible things.

“‘You’re a demon in human skin. You know that?’ expressed Kunikida in utter disgust…”

Now, I’m not defending Dazai or saying that Kunikida is wrong to be upset, but he is using language that he knows will get to Dazai. He isn’t saying Dazai is doing terrible things, he’s saying he’s a demon, that he’s not human. He’s dehumanizing and abusing a co-worker, he’s lashing out with the most hurtful things he can. And the worst part is that his behavior is so normalized that everyone brushes it off or interprets it as his way of showing affection. They think it’s a weird friendship, that Dazai and Kunikida balance each other. They don’t, not outside a fight. The dynamic they have is seriously fucked up. Our introduction to them is literally Dazai trying to kill himself to get away from Kunikida, okay? That’s a red flag. Kunikida is a major asshole. And I think we need to acknowledge that, just like we all agree that Dazai is also a major asshole.