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this is my favorite genre of posts

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I didn’t realise but I finally passed 500 followers! I’m sitting at 550ish now. Thank you so much to everyone who’s following me and enjoys my fics! 🫶🏻

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Swimming Lessons (Goku x reader)

On a scorching summer afternoon, the gang had gathered on Roshi’s island to cool off and catch up. Y/N was stretched out on a beach towel bathing in the warm summer sun watching the playful splashing of the Z fighter gang. Bulma was up on Yamcha’s shoulders, Krillin on Tien’s, and Chiaotzu floating nearby on Turtle’s back. They were giggling and teasing one another as Krillin and Bulma tried their best to push one another off. Krillin had strength, but Bulma had both height and her feisty nature to her advantage.

Goku who had been floating alongside them came running out of the ocean towards Y/N. “Come on Y/N we can take them” Goku cheekily chippered. “Looks fun but I’m quite comfy here” Y/N mused lazily stretched out as they gazed up at him. Goku was getting quite desperate as his gaze whipped between the play fight and Y/N. Hopping from foot-to-foot Goku began to let out whiney pleas, “Please Y/N. Come on I promise we’ll win.” Y/N felt bad turning him down but there was no way they were getting in the ocean. “I’m sorry Goku but I can’t. You know I never swim when we hang out like this” Y/N guiltily apologized.

Confused by this, Goku wracked his brain thinking back to all the times the gaggle of friends had hung out at the beach. In his memories Y/N always seemed absent when it came to water-based activities and he felt somewhat guilty for failing to notice. But determined to change that Goku cheerfully mused, “Let’s change that then! Starting now with a win against the victor.” Bending down Goku began trying to help his friend up. “No, I can’t Goku!” Y/N exclaimed loudly while swatting his hands away. Y/N peered around conspiratorially to make sure nobody had noticed the outburst before continuing, “I can’t get in the ocean because I can’t swim. Even with you there I’m afraid something will happen, and I’ll drown.” Goku’s eyes widened in surprise and before Y/N could hush him he loudly blurted out, “Wow I can’t believe you can’t swim at our age Y/N.” Y/N’s body flushed with embarrassment as they began to shift uncomfortably.

Despite knowing that Goku was a bit socially inept and hadn’t meant to hurt their feelings his assertion stung. Turning their gaze to the fun in the water Y/N admitted, “Yes okay I can’t swim, nobody ever taught me. It’s not like it’s something people are born knowing how to do and it’s too embarrassing to ask someone to teach me.” “I could teach you” Goku chirped instantly. Taken aback by his offer Y/N questioned him, “are you sure? I don’t want to be a burden.” Goku smiled brightly down at Y/N, “Of course! If you’re too embarrassed to learn with everyone here now we can meet up some other time for a lesson. I know the perfect place where no one ever goes.” Accepting his offer with a shy grin, “Thanks Goku, I appreciate it. I’m definitely keen to learn.” Plopping down on the sand next to his friend Goku bumped their shoulders together, “Any time.”

--- Several Day ---

Y/N had received a call from Goku earlier that morning inviting them around to his home for a swimming lesson later that afternoon. Pulling up in the Capsule Corp car Bulma had gifted them Y/N saw Goku emerging from one of the buildings. The property had been left to him by his Grandpa Gohan before his disappearance.

Hopping out of the car, Y/N was quick to greet Goku with a quick hug. Goku gave a quick squeeze back before moving to pop the boot and help unload. Y/N had packed ingredients to cook Goku dinner as thanks for the lesson. The muscular man gathered up all the bags in one go and began lugging them inside. After dumping them down rather uncarefully on the table the two fell into a comfortable rhythm as they unpacked and stored the groceries. Once they had all been packed away Goku led Y/N down a winding worn dirt path.

The two made small talk as they walked through the trees, breaking through into a small clearing. Before them lay a sparkling lake framed by soft sandy shores with several large rocks that were perfect for sunbathing. Grabbing Goku’s arm excitedly Y/N exclaimed, “Goku this is perfect! It’s gorgeous.” Goku gave Y/N a cheeky grin and led the way closer to the lake. “I’m glad you like it, I often come here to swim and fish” Goku mused as he stripped down into his swimming trunks. Following suit, Y/N stripped down into their own swimsuit. Taking Goku’s hand the two waded hand in hand to waist depth.

Despite Y/N’s nervousness they completely trusted Goku to keep them safe. “We’ll start easy. Lie on your back like a starfish” Goku instructed. Doing as they were told Y/N laid back and put their trust in Goku’s guidance.

--- A Few Hours Later ---

After a few hours of learning different swimming styles Y/N had begun to get the hang of it. Y/N splashed around as Goku watched his student with pride. “See, it didn’t take you long to learn, did it?” Goku praised, “with a little bit more practice you’ll be a pro.” A little embarrassed by his praise Y/N splashed the man. “Oh, so it’s like that” Goku smirked, mischief twinkling in his eyes. Within seconds Y/N was drenched and gasping for air open mouthed like a goldfish. A full water war had begun, and it wouldn’t be settled until a victor had emerged. A happy ending to Y/N’s decades long aversion to the water.

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Solemn Goodbyes (Thranduil x poly!reader x Thorin) - Alternative Ending

A/N: This is the alternative ending to the requested poly!reader mini series. TAGS: Angst.

Part one: Reigniting Old Feuds Part two: Escalating Tensions Part three (Ending): Seeking Recompense

Y/N had decided, tomorrow they were going to visit Bard. The King always knew what to say, even if it wasn’t always what one wanted to hear. Pouring out the contents of her stone cold cup in the kitchen sink Y/N heard a loud knock at the door. By now it was certainly the hour of the witch, not a common time for visitors by any means. Perhaps Bard had heard the rumours that they’d returned back to town and come to check in. Hurrying to the door Y/N unlocked it and cracked it just enough to look through. The sight was unexpected to say the least. Two dishevelled Kings stood upon the stoop.

Before either could speak Y/N answered, “I’m sorry…this isn’t going to work. It’s best that we end things here and now. I won’t be made to choose between the two of you nor will I be responsible for war and tensions between Elves and Dwarves. Now if you’ll excuse me I’d quite like to retire for the evening” Y/N tiredly mumbled, moving to close the heavy door. The door was met with resistance barring it from closing. It was a jar enough that Y/N was able to peer around it to see two hands stopping the door. One hand was smaller and rougher than the other, with age old calluses from years of harsh work. The other was as pale as moonlight with long slender fingers that looked as though they have never worked a day in their lives. Neither hand pushed particularly hard, simply enough to prevent Y/N from closing it.

“Y/N please wait” Thorin begged his voice thick with emotion. Angered by their persistence Y/N swung the door open suddenly, “what more is there to be said?“ The young human was overwhelmed by the sudden appearance at the door. “Even if the two of you have made tentative peace, what's to stop the two of you starting up again in the future? I can’t do this, I shouldn't have to. The two of you promise me that this would work, that our relationships would be healthy. Enough is enough.“

Both men nodded, expressions swirling with guilt and upset. “We understand and we were wrong. Our feuding for your affections put you in an uncomfortable position. A mediator having to temper the green eyed monster of jealousy. We gave a word that we would make it work and then we broke it. For what it’s worth it’s worth we’re sorry” Thranduil offered as Thorin nodded in agreement.

Weighing Thranduil’s words Y/N assessed their body language. To the credit of both men it did seem that they were sincerely sorry. “If you’re willing to give us another chance then we will make things right. The two of us already have ideas of how to stop this in future” Thorin admitted, “ but if you are unwilling to give us a second chance we understand. We’ll leave you to your peace.”

Thranduil quickly followed up, “you don’t have to decide now. We’re willing to wait as long as you need.” A pregnant silence fell between the three as Y/N mulled over the offer. Each suitor stood tense and tall, breath baited as they eagerly awaited response. Eyes fluttering closed Y/N took a deep breath, loudly exhaling to steel their nerves. Meeting the gaze of each man Y/N firmly asserted, “I’ve made my decision.”

--- Ending Diverges Here ---

“I appreciate the apology, but I won’t come back. I’m sorry to disappoint the two of you but I won’t put myself in that position again” Y/N firmly voiced. The air seemed to grow colder around them and Y/N wrapped their arms tightly around themself. The spark of hope within the two’s eyes dimmed and their expressions became grim.

An uncomfortable silence settled over the trio. “I wish we could make this work but it’s for the best. The presence of a fourth, the green-eyed monster jealousy, makes our relationship unsalvageable. It’s reared its head once and a few honeyed words won’t silence it now” Y/N justified, “We have to think about our peoples too. If these tensions were to grow then man, elf, and dwarf would suffer.”

“There’s nothing we can say or do that will change your mind?” Thorin questioned desperately, “At least let us tell you about the safeguards we’ve put in place, please.” “I…no I’m sorry but it would be best if the two of you leave” Y/N disagreed. Each man nodded, tears clouding their eyes. “Just know that if you ever change your mind both of us would be willing to reunite in a heartbeat” Thranduil conceded, tone dripping with sorrow. Touching each former lover’s cheek briefly Y/N gave each a heartbroken but loving smile before stepping back and softly closing the door.

Pressing an ear gently up to the door Y/N strained to listen through it. It took several long minutes but eventually footsteps began to lead away. When Y/N was certain the two were gone, they slumped into the cold oak door as sobs wracked their body uncontrollably. A bitter end to once loving relationships that had been tainted by the tendrils of jealousy.

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I decided to finish this here and then just post the alternative ending separately. Alt Ending is up now. I hope I’ve done your request justice @satans-bitch!

Part Three: Seeking Recompense (Thorin x poly!reader x Thranduil)

Part One: Reigniting Old Feuds & Part Two: Escalating Tensions

A/N: I decided to finish this here and then just post the alternative ending separately.

Y/N had decided, tomorrow they were going to visit Bard. The King always knew what to say, even if it wasn’t always what one wanted to hear. Pouring out the contents of her stone cold cup in the kitchen sink Y/N heard a loud knock at the door. By now it was certainly the hour of the witch, not a common time for visitors by any means. Perhaps Bard had heard the rumours that they’d returned back to town and come to check in. Hurrying to the door Y/N unlocked it and cracked it just enough to look through. The sight was unexpected to say the least. Two dishevelled Kings stood upon the stoop.

Before either could speak Y/N answered, “I’m sorry…this isn’t going to work. It’s best that we end things here and now. I won’t be made to choose between the two of you nor will I be responsible for war and tensions between Elves and Dwarves. Now if you’ll excuse me I’d quite like to retire for the evening” Y/N tiredly mumbled, moving to close the heavy door. The door was met with resistance barring it from closing. It was a jar enough that Y/N was able to peer around it to see two hands stopping the door. One hand was smaller and rougher than the other, with age old calluses from years of harsh work. The other was as pale as moonlight with long slender fingers that looked as though they have never worked a day in their lives. Neither hand pushed particularly hard, simply enough to prevent Y/N from closing it.

“Y/N please wait” Thorin begged his voice thick with emotion. Angered by their persistence Y/N swung the door open suddenly, “what more is there to be said?“ The young human was overwhelmed by the sudden appearance at the door. “Even if the two of you have made tentative peace, what's to stop the two of you starting up again in the future? I can’t do this, I shouldn't have to. The two of you promise me that this would work, that our relationships would be healthy. Enough is enough.“

Both men nodded, expressions swirling with guilt and upset. “We understand and we were wrong. Our feuding for your affections put you in an uncomfortable position. A mediator having to temper the green eyed monster of jealousy. We gave a word that we would make it work and then we broke it. For what it’s worth it’s worth we’re sorry” Thranduil offered as Thorin nodded in agreement.

Weighing Thranduil’s words Y/N assessed their body language. To the credit of both men it did seem that they were sincerely sorry. “If you’re willing to give us another chance then we will make things right. The two of us already have ideas of how to stop this in future” Thorin admitted, “ but if you are unwilling to give us a second chance we understand. We’ll leave you to your peace.”

Thranduil quickly followed up, “you don’t have to decide now. We’re willing to wait as long as you need.” A pregnant silence fell between the three as Y/N mulled over the offer. Each suitor stood tense and tall, breath baited as they eagerly awaited response. Eyes fluttering closed Y/N took a deep breath, loudly exhaling to steel their nerves. Meeting the gaze of each man Y/N firmly asserted, “I’ve made my decision.”

The world seemed to slow as Thorin and Thranduil awaited Y/N’s answer, breath baited. “I’m willing to forgive the two of you, IF you promise me that this foolishness won’t happen again. This is the one and only chance. If it happens again, I promise you both that I won’t even answer the door to you” Y/N asserted firmly. Each lover let out a relieved breath, nodding as they took in Y/N’s words. “We won’t break our word again but your terms are fair” Thorin agreed as Thranduil hummed in agreement. Stepping to the side Y/N opened the door welcomingly, “now that’s settled, why don’t the two of you come in and tell me more about the safe guards you’ve thought up.”  

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Happy Ending: Seeking Recompense (Thorin x poly!reader x Thranduil)

Part One: Reigniting Old Feuds & Part Two: Escalating Tensions

A/N: I decided to finish this here and then just post the alternative ending separately.

Y/N had decided, tomorrow they were going to visit Bard. The King always knew what to say, even if it wasn’t always what one wanted to hear. Pouring out the contents of her stone cold cup in the kitchen sink Y/N heard a loud knock at the door. By now it was certainly the hour of the witch, not a common time for visitors by any means. Perhaps Bard had heard the rumours that they’d returned back to town and come to check in. Hurrying to the door Y/N unlocked it and cracked it just enough to look through. The sight was unexpected to say the least. Two dishevelled Kings stood upon the stoop.

Before either could speak Y/N answered, “I’m sorry…this isn’t going to work. It’s best that we end things here and now. I won’t be made to choose between the two of you nor will I be responsible for war and tensions between Elves and Dwarves. Now if you’ll excuse me I’d quite like to retire for the evening” Y/N tiredly mumbled, moving to close the heavy door. The door was met with resistance barring it from closing. It was a jar enough that Y/N was able to peer around it to see two hands stopping the door. One hand was smaller and rougher than the other, with age old calluses from years of harsh work. The other was as pale as moonlight with long slender fingers that looked as though they have never worked a day in their lives. Neither hand pushed particularly hard, simply enough to prevent Y/N from closing it.

“Y/N please wait” Thorin begged his voice thick with emotion. Angered by their persistence Y/N swung the door open suddenly, “what more is there to be said?“ The young human was overwhelmed by the sudden appearance at the door. “Even if the two of you have made tentative peace, what's to stop the two of you starting up again in the future? I can’t do this, I shouldn't have to. The two of you promise me that this would work, that our relationships would be healthy. Enough is enough.“

Both men nodded, expressions swirling with guilt and upset. “We understand and we were wrong. Our feuding for your affections put you in an uncomfortable position. A mediator having to temper the green eyed monster of jealousy. We gave a word that we would make it work and then we broke it. For what it’s worth it’s worth we’re sorry” Thranduil offered as Thorin nodded in agreement.

Weighing Thranduil’s words Y/N assessed their body language. To the credit of both men it did seem that they were sincerely sorry. “If you’re willing to give us another chance then we will make things right. The two of us already have ideas of how to stop this in future” Thorin admitted, “ but if you are unwilling to give us a second chance we understand. We’ll leave you to your peace.”

Thranduil quickly followed up, “you don’t have to decide now. We’re willing to wait as long as you need.” A pregnant silence fell between the three as Y/N mulled over the offer. Each suitor stood tense and tall, breath baited as they eagerly awaited response. Eyes fluttering closed Y/N took a deep breath, loudly exhaling to steel their nerves. Meeting the gaze of each man Y/N firmly asserted, “I’ve made my decision.”

The world seemed to slow as Thorin and Thranduil awaited Y/N’s answer, breath baited. “I’m willing to forgive the two of you, IF you promise me that this foolishness won’t happen again. This is the one and only chance. If it happens again, I promise you both that I won’t even answer the door to you” Y/N asserted firmly. Each lover let out a relieved breath, nodding as they took in Y/N’s words. “We won’t break our word again but your terms are fair” Thorin agreed as Thranduil hummed in agreement. Stepping to the side Y/N opened the door welcomingly, “now that’s settled, why don’t the two of you come in and tell me more about the safe guards you’ve thought up.”  

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I’m glad you’re liking it!!! I finally uploaded the next part! It’s a little short but I’m planning on two endings based off of it :)

Escalating Tensions (Thorin x poly!reader x Thranduil)

This is part two to Reigniting Old Feuds. I will be writing a part three. Request by @satans-bitch

Clasping the hot porcelain cup between their hands, Y/N stared blankly into the crackling fire of the hearth. The room flickered as flames licked up logs and turned the kindling too ash. The fighting and jealousy of their two lovers had run Y/N ragged and in a bid to escape it they had returned to the peace of their modest home in Dale. As the moon shone through the window the cozy home felt lonely. Yet Y/N would rather face the bitter sting of loneliness than continue to suffer through the raging rivalry between Thorin and Thranduil. The young human began to reflect upon the beginning of their relationship.

Harsh banging upon the door startled Y/N awake. Realising they had cried themself to sleep at their desk after having envoys deliver each king their answer the young advisor gently rubbed their eyes. Gritty sleep fell from as Y/N cringed at their swollen feel. Rising and straightening themselves out Y/N took in a deep breath before heading to answer the door. Y/N had a decent idea of who it might be visiting so early in the morning. Upon answering the door Y/N had little chance to step back before two figures were barging their way into the small home, arguing the entire time.

Thranduil and Thorin stood before Y/N each looking as though they’d had little sleep the night before. “You’re serious about what you sent then? That you won’t choose between the two of us” Thorin broached carefully. Having little energy left Y/N simply nodded. Thorin pursed his lips together tightly as his brows furrowed. “What if you didn’t have to choose between us?” Thranduil reasoned. Y/N straightened up surprised by the implication of Thranduil’s words. “Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting” Y/N squeaked searching both kings faces trying to gauge their feelings.

“We spoke about it before we came. While neither of us is particularly keen on the thought of sharing, we also don’t want to lose you” Thorin confirmed. “Can you promise that you will not be jealous of one another? That we can set boundaries to stop any resentment or jealousy building?” Y/N questioned cautiously. It was fine to suggest a polyamorous relationship, but Y/N knew that with two rivals as volatile as these two it was likely to devolve into jealousy, bitterness, and anger. A war would not benefit any kingdom, least of all Dale who’d be stuck in the middle of it.

Both monarchs nodded in confirmation. “Our proposal is simple; you would send a month at a time in each of our kingdoms. During that time, the other partner is welcome to write to you, send gifts, and, if agreed upon by the receiving monarch, may even come to visit from time to time. You’d be free to come and go as you please of course and if you wish to return to Dale at any point we can have that arranged too” Thranduil reasoned. “That seems reasonable” Y/N admitted as they mulled over the proposition. “We’ve agreed that even if tension was to arise between the two of us” Thorin gestured to Thranduil “neither kingdom would suffer for it. Trade and allyship is to the benefit of both of our people if Sauron is to return.” Bowing their head a large smile broke out on Y/N’s face, “then I accept this deal.”

A small smile had made its way to Y/N’s lip as they reminisced upon the beginning of the relationship. It had been a surprise that the two had even settled on such an agreement but not unwelcome by any means. If anything, it had seemed an omen of good things to come. Things had been great between the three of them, at least for several months before the jealousy had set in and two rivals had fallen back into old habits.

After having spent a month in Erebor with Thorin, Y/N had made the journey by armed escort to the Woodland Realm. Thranduil had been delighted to see his beloved, sweeping Y/N into his arms as soon as the guards had left his sight. Nuzzling his nose into Y/N’s neck he’d suddenly paused, a sudden stiffness to his embrace. Surprised Y/N pulled back slightly trying to figure out what was going on. Thranduil’s hand shot up to clasp the newly beaded braid woven into their hair. His grip was gentle enough as to not hurt them but firm as he inspected the bead. Tight jawed Thranduil had said nothing else about it before dropping his hand and pulling Y/N along to their shared chambers.

The Elven King did not need to say anything, his thoughts were clear. Thranduil was bothered by the braid and courting bead that Thorin had gifted Y/N. The dwarven lover had meticulously woven strand upon strand together as an open declaration of his love to any who came across Y/N. Outside of the overwhelming sense of love and pride such an action had imbued them with, Y/N had thought little upon what Thranduil would think about such a gesture. Now it seemed that perhaps that oversight was a mistake, that envy would once again rear its ugly head.

Y/N kicked themself for not putting a stop to it then. In truth they hoped that it would resolve itself, it certainly seemed like it had when the rest of the visit went on uneventful. They should have known it was the calm before the storm.

The night before Y/N was set to return to Erebor Thranduil had presented Y/N with a breath-taking gift. Reasoning that if Thorin was allowed to permanently mark Y/N as his that Thranduil should have the same right he had presented them with a delicate bead imbued with the White Gems of Lasgalen. So, Y/N found themself with a braid and courting bead from both king’s woven into each side of their hair.

Y/N only hoped that the act wouldn’t upset Thorin, especially considering the significance of courting beads and hair braiding in dwarven culture. Their prayers went unanswered.

Approaching the towering stone gates of Erebor Y/N wrung their hands nervously. Thorin awaited them with at the gates with a glowing grin. His excitement was short lived. Once his eyes had spotted the elven braid his brow had furrowed, and mood darkened. Greeting Y/N cordially as not to give away his upset to anyone watching their greeting. After sweeping Y/N away to settle into their quarters in the royal wing he’d kissed Y/N fiercely before storming out. “I have a letter to write to that elven bastard” Thorin had boomed as he stalked towards his study.

Things had only soured from there with countless other tense meetings and angry words shared. That was why Y/N found themself back in Dale, an attempt to escape the escalating hostilities and regroup. It was obvious that if they did not intervene now that the two would continue to annoy Y/N with their childish bickering. A game plan was needed, and Y/N knew the exact man to help come up with it.

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Could you do a one-shot of Frieza? Maybe he’s just hovering above earth plotting (as villains typically do with their internal monologues) and gets hit with the “love at first sight” of a human girl, (perhaps a friend of bulma) and is immediately captivated by how gentle and beautiful she is, but this is Frieza we’re talking about so he probably thinks she did something to him to make him feel this sort of way

Bewitched (Frieza x fem!reader)

A/N: This one is a little short but I hope you like it!

Revenge was a dish best served cold, a thought Frieza had been pacifying himself with constantly since his first defeat on Namek. He’d spent countless hours plotting about how he would rid himself of the Saiyan scum. Now the time had come. After countless hours of training, something Frieza hadn’t done a single day in his life, he was ready. They would pay for their humiliation, for his temporary dethroning. As the ship came to a stop, hovering above Capsule Corp he flew out towards it to survey the scene.

Below him stood a crowd of earthlings, half-Saiyans, and his two foes standing in front of the crowd waiting for him. As Frieza scanned over the crowd he found himself instantly bewitched. A mere human woman stood amongst the crowd gazing up at him with a mix of fear and hatred. The sight tugged at his heart in an unknown spinechilling way.

“Women, who are you? What have you done to me?” Frieza shrieked pointing at her, tail whipping violently behind him. The terrified woman merely cried out in fright clinging to the arm of Vegeta’s blue haired woman. A delicate looking creature, especially in such a state of fear. “What the hell are you talking about” Vegeta crossly snapped back, jaw clenched as he stared up at his former slaver. “How dare she use her powers on me” Frieza emphasised. “Powers? What powers?” the small bird boned women asked voice quivering. “Y/N is just a normal human. She can’t even channel her ki” Goku replied to Frieza, head cocked as he analysed him.

It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that Frieza had returned, revenge was in his nature. Yet, it seemed something else entirely was afoot. “Her! She’s done something to me. I’m having a strange squeezing in my chest. It didn’t start until I made eye contact with her, she’s bewitching me” Frieza snapped at the two stupid Saiyans. Vegeta was visibly taken aback for a second before he broke out in barking laughter. Wiping tears from his eyes the oldest Saiyan simply said, “If you’d told me as a boy that I’d get to see Frieza, Lord of the Universe flustered by a simple crush.”

Frieza was stunned by Vegeta’s bold proclamation, “It can’t be. You’re wrong Vegeta, that woman isn’t as innocent as she seems.” Vegeta simply burst out into louder more obnoxious laughter. Y/N stood stunned beside Bulma at the scene unfolding unsure what to make of it. “If Y/N has you so wound up then you might as well leave. Neither Kakarot or I are interested in fighting you when you’re not at your best” with that Vegeta turned and strode away from him.

“Mark my words, the next time I return I’ll destroy this planet and all of you pathetic creatures on it” Frieza announced in faux calm, “I’ll find a way around this bewitching.” Stealing a final glance at Y/N Frieza tactically retreated, convinced that he’d find a way to overcome this and return for his long-awaited revenge.

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I feel like some of them have potential but I tend to rush to post instead of taking my time to edit and rewrite bits. Lmk what you think!

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I’ve finally written the ending to the Thorin x poly!reader x Thranduil fic request! I’ve decided to turn it into a choose your own ending type fic. Will you choose to end things with your two flames or will you seek healthy resolutions to your issues?

Hopefully I’ll have it typed out to post later this week!

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They’re streaming Coachella on WeChat in China and I’m losing my mind at this poor censor who was trying to move this black box around to censor the dancers’ asses while Megan Thee Stallion was performing “WAP.” Someone please find the clip and post it on here, I can’t explain how funny it was to watch this black box frantically bounce around from ass to ass while being controlled by a man desperately trying not to lose his job

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Human Informant (Frieza x gn!reader) - Part Two to Alien Invasion

Read Part One here

It was not often that Frieza found himself in the act of sparing life forms of insignificant power or explicit usefulness. Yet the human race found themselves outliving their expected annihilation. The courage of one singular human had spared the entirety of their race. Tapping his long tail against the cool metal of his throne Frieza gazed out over Earth 2.0 below.

Y/N was a refreshing change. While the human was (rightfully) weary of the alien Emperor, they refused to cower in fear as the rest of their species had. Instead, Y/N had offered directions and valuable information that he had asked for. While shaken up at the thought of being flown hundreds of feet up in the air by Zarbon, Y/N had still questioned the limiting of their sight.

Once at Capsule Corp the human had been of even greater assistance. After pointing out what each building on the estate was, or likely was if Y/N was unsure, the trio had made their way to the Provisional Government building. Unsurprisingly the Government was in session and anxiously awaiting their arrival. News spread quickly and there was no doubt that someone had notified them as soon as the alien duo and their pet human had taken off.

Frieza had taken little time in informing the room of his importance and status in the universe before setting out what he expected from his new pets. Technology. While some human technology and resources were relatively primitive, the race showed great potential to adapt and innovate. Given the right tools they would be a useful source of technological advancement and aid to his Empire. In turn for technology he would pardon their occupation of his planet. This offer had of course been paired with his characteristic wit and charm, insulting the weakness of human strength in one breath while praising their innovation and adaptability in the other.

The braver, or perhaps stupider, politicians broke out in hushed debate over his ‘proposal.’ Frieza was not to be denied, Y/N had seen first hand what his impatience and annoyance looked like. Evidence of it could be seen back at the explosion site. Before a committee member had the opportunity to speak up in denial, question Frieza, or say something that may be misconstrued, Y/N spoke up.

“With all due respect there is no room for debate. This is a one time offer with a looming expiration date if you don’t accept it soon. I’m sure you’ve already heard about the destruction at Base City Two…” Y/N tapered off not wanting to give Frieza any ideas. “The human is right, time is ticking. If you don’t accept my offer now I’m afraid I’ll have to forcibly remove you from my planet” Frieza taunted the room, eyes boring down at officials from his elevated throne. He was slightly impressed by Y/N’s initiate to wrap things up. The longer he was made to wait the more the human government pressed their luck.

“Very well” one official spoke up, head bowed in defeat, “we of course accept and will begin whatever preparations you deem necessary as soon as told.” A smug smirk painted the corners of Frieza’s mouth, “I’m glad we could come to an… agreement. Starting tomorrow my soldiers and scientists will be in touch to make the necessary preparations and teachings of higher technology. For now, I will retire to my ship. I look forward to working together.”

With that Frieza’s floating throne sharply turned to face Y/N and Zarbon. “Come we return to the ship. Bring Y/N with us, they will act as our informant on human culture, politics, and science” the Emperor ordered Zarbon. Together the three blasted into the sky leaving a wake of stunned humans.

Masterlist

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Alien Invasion (Frieza x gn!reader)

Request: “Idk if you write for him but could we please have a Frieza x female human reader pls? Idk why but I am starved of this! Spare a few crumbs pls?”

AU (events of DBZ don't happen)

Earth was gone. Destroyed in a meteor shower. Officials had predicted the meteor shower and in conjunction with Capsule Corp had made preparations for the evacuation of the population. A random ticketing system had been rolled out to fill spots on the evacuation crafts. Y/N had been fortunate enough to have been allocated a space on one of these ships. 

They had set off on a voyage amongst the stars, searching for a suitable but uninhabited planet for resettlement. After several months of exploration in the dark void of space a planet had been located and settled upon. The ruins of an ancient alien civilisation were present but no sentient species seemed to inhabit the planet. A bad omen that was reinforced by piles of weathered bones strewn across paths and huddled in houses. Genocide, At least that’s what it looked like. Yet after observing the planet for a month and sending scouting teams out no particular evil could be found. Whatever had caused the atrocities seemed to have moved on.

So the remainder of the human race dutifully cleaned up, burying skeletons in neatly dug graves and erecting memorials to pay respects to the unknown peoples. What could be restored of the ruined cities were marked out and the rest cleared to make way for temporary capsule homes and communal structures. Life seemed to be settling, humanity adjusting to their new home. 

After a year on the planet the sky had filled with UFO’s. They’d opened up and the sky had swarmed with alien soldiers all uniformed in the same armour. In the middle a striking white and purple alien floated upon a throne. After it was sure that it had captured the attention of all nearby humans it spoke, “My my isn’t this an interesting sight. This planet was occupied and cleared by my soldiers many years ago after the population refused to kneel to my rule. Such a shame really, they could have flourished under my command. No matter, they got what they deserved for the disobedience. Yet, here I find your species, settled in on the ash of a once great civilisation. I must say you’ve done a marvelous job at rebuilding in such a short time.” 

It’s voice was shriller than expected given its muscular form, yet under different circumstances Y/N would have found it enticing. “Oh how rude of me, I haven’t even introduced myself. I am Lord Frieza, Emperor of the Universe and the owner of this planet. It seems that despite being such a weak race you are rather technologically advanced. So if you point me to your leader or leaders I am willing to strike a deal. You will work for me, as part of my Empire, creating new technologies or you will perish as those on this planet who refused me before you did” Frieza declared his voice laced with amusement, “now who will point me in the direction of your leader?” 

Not a sound was made by the large crowd who had gathered underneath the shadow of the looming invasionary army. “Very well maybe I should show you a small taste of my power to motivate you” Frieza declared. Simply raising a finger towards the largest tower the alien shot out a pink beam of light. For a moment nothing happened and the crowd watched on with bated breath. But then a blinding beam of light flashed followed by an ear bursting boom as the tower was eviscerated. With a smirk Frieza turned his attention back to the crowd. Before Y/N could even process what they were doing, they heard their own voice ring out, “Excuse me Lord Frieza, I can show you the way to Capsule Corp. It’s the location of the family who built the ships that got us here and our provisional government is located there while a new building is being built for them.” 

Frieza’s eyes locked on to the human before him, assessing the being. They weren’t powerful by any means but in truth he admired their bravery in the face of such overwhelming danger. After all, the rest of their race was either too stunned or fearful to react or had begun to dash away screaming. “Very well. Zarbon you will accompany me. Dodoria you will stay here and keep an eye on our soldiers. I am a man of my word after all and no harm is to be done without my orders” Frieza barked out, “Do you know how to fly human?” The stunned expression that danced across their face over the revelation most sentient life forms could fly told Frieza all he needed to know. Lowering his throne slightly he beckoned the human over sharply. “What is your name?” he queried. Frieza was returned with a simple “Y/N, my lord.” “Very well Y/N, we will need a good run down on the current state of the planet, the extent to which you’ve settled, and a great many other things. Since you’ve already proven yourself far more useful than these other humans you will come with us to this Capsule Corp and ensure I am as informed on everything I need to be” Frieza asserted, “now be a dear and tell us exactly where it is we need to go.”

After giving a detailed description of what Capsule Corp and its surrounding area looked like paired with detailed directions Frieza seemed satisfied. “Very well. Zarbon, you are to carry our guest. Gently, these humans are delicate creatures” Frieze commanded. With that Y/N was scooped up by the muscular green alien, cradled awkwardly against his cool armour. “Excuse me” Y/N squeaked, “wouldn’t it be better if I could see where we were going so that I can direct you? I can’t really see anything like this.” Zarbon scoffed at being questioned, “No. With the speed we will be travelling at, your weak eyes won’t be able to see anything anyway. We’ll be travelling off the directions you already gave to get to the area and then figure it out from there.” Nodding Y/N clung to Zarbon. “Let’s go” Frieza ordered, levitating up higher into the air. Following his lead Zarbon took to the air and at jet-like speeds the trio took off leaving the rest of the army staring in their wake.

Read Part Two here

Masterlist

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I could have sworn there was an ask in my box asking for some sort of Goku x reader but it’s gone now?

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This is super handy, thank you! I definitely will be using it to try curb adhd impulse spends

I've been spending a lot of money online recently so I made a handy chart to go through before I buy anything online. This is for items like clothing and frivolous things like decorations btw, it doesn't apply to food or necessities. Basically it's my way of safeguarding against overspending, and I thought other people might find it helpful too.

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Escalating Tensions (Thorin x poly!reader x Thranduil)

This is part two to Reigniting Old Feuds. I will be writing a part three. Request by @satans-bitch

Clasping the hot porcelain cup between their hands, Y/N stared blankly into the crackling fire of the hearth. The room flickered as flames licked up logs and turned the kindling too ash. The fighting and jealousy of their two lovers had run Y/N ragged and in a bid to escape it they had returned to the peace of their modest home in Dale. As the moon shone through the window the cozy home felt lonely. Yet Y/N would rather face the bitter sting of loneliness than continue to suffer through the raging rivalry between Thorin and Thranduil. The young human began to reflect upon the beginning of their relationship.

Harsh banging upon the door startled Y/N awake. Realising they had cried themself to sleep at their desk after having envoys deliver each king their answer the young advisor gently rubbed their eyes. Gritty sleep fell from as Y/N cringed at their swollen feel. Rising and straightening themselves out Y/N took in a deep breath before heading to answer the door. Y/N had a decent idea of who it might be visiting so early in the morning. Upon answering the door Y/N had little chance to step back before two figures were barging their way into the small home, arguing the entire time.

Thranduil and Thorin stood before Y/N each looking as though they’d had little sleep the night before. “You’re serious about what you sent then? That you won’t choose between the two of us” Thorin broached carefully. Having little energy left Y/N simply nodded. Thorin pursed his lips together tightly as his brows furrowed. “What if you didn’t have to choose between us?” Thranduil reasoned. Y/N straightened up surprised by the implication of Thranduil’s words. “Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting” Y/N squeaked searching both kings faces trying to gauge their feelings.

“We spoke about it before we came. While neither of us is particularly keen on the thought of sharing, we also don’t want to lose you” Thorin confirmed. “Can you promise that you will not be jealous of one another? That we can set boundaries to stop any resentment or jealousy building?” Y/N questioned cautiously. It was fine to suggest a polyamorous relationship, but Y/N knew that with two rivals as volatile as these two it was likely to devolve into jealousy, bitterness, and anger. A war would not benefit any kingdom, least of all Dale who’d be stuck in the middle of it.

Both monarchs nodded in confirmation. “Our proposal is simple; you would send a month at a time in each of our kingdoms. During that time, the other partner is welcome to write to you, send gifts, and, if agreed upon by the receiving monarch, may even come to visit from time to time. You’d be free to come and go as you please of course and if you wish to return to Dale at any point we can have that arranged too” Thranduil reasoned. “That seems reasonable” Y/N admitted as they mulled over the proposition. “We’ve agreed that even if tension was to arise between the two of us” Thorin gestured to Thranduil “neither kingdom would suffer for it. Trade and allyship is to the benefit of both of our people if Sauron is to return.” Bowing their head a large smile broke out on Y/N’s face, “then I accept this deal.”

A small smile had made its way to Y/N’s lip as they reminisced upon the beginning of the relationship. It had been a surprise that the two had even settled on such an agreement but not unwelcome by any means. If anything, it had seemed an omen of good things to come. Things had been great between the three of them, at least for several months before the jealousy had set in and two rivals had fallen back into old habits.

After having spent a month in Erebor with Thorin, Y/N had made the journey by armed escort to the Woodland Realm. Thranduil had been delighted to see his beloved, sweeping Y/N into his arms as soon as the guards had left his sight. Nuzzling his nose into Y/N’s neck he’d suddenly paused, a sudden stiffness to his embrace. Surprised Y/N pulled back slightly trying to figure out what was going on. Thranduil’s hand shot up to clasp the newly beaded braid woven into their hair. His grip was gentle enough as to not hurt them but firm as he inspected the bead. Tight jawed Thranduil had said nothing else about it before dropping his hand and pulling Y/N along to their shared chambers.

The Elven King did not need to say anything, his thoughts were clear. Thranduil was bothered by the braid and courting bead that Thorin had gifted Y/N. The dwarven lover had meticulously woven strand upon strand together as an open declaration of his love to any who came across Y/N. Outside of the overwhelming sense of love and pride such an action had imbued them with, Y/N had thought little upon what Thranduil would think about such a gesture. Now it seemed that perhaps that oversight was a mistake, that envy would once again rear its ugly head.

Y/N kicked themself for not putting a stop to it then. In truth they hoped that it would resolve itself, it certainly seemed like it had when the rest of the visit went on uneventful. They should have known it was the calm before the storm.

The night before Y/N was set to return to Erebor Thranduil had presented Y/N with a breath-taking gift. Reasoning that if Thorin was allowed to permanently mark Y/N as his that Thranduil should have the same right he had presented them with a delicate bead imbued with the White Gems of Lasgalen. So, Y/N found themself with a braid and courting bead from both king’s woven into each side of their hair.

Y/N only hoped that the act wouldn’t upset Thorin, especially considering the significance of courting beads and hair braiding in dwarven culture. Their prayers went unanswered.

Approaching the towering stone gates of Erebor Y/N wrung their hands nervously. Thorin awaited them with at the gates with a glowing grin. His excitement was short lived. Once his eyes had spotted the elven braid his brow had furrowed, and mood darkened. Greeting Y/N cordially as not to give away his upset to anyone watching their greeting. After sweeping Y/N away to settle into their quarters in the royal wing he’d kissed Y/N fiercely before storming out. “I have a letter to write to that elven bastard” Thorin had boomed as he stalked towards his study.

Things had only soured from there with countless other tense meetings and angry words shared. That was why Y/N found themself back in Dale, an attempt to escape the escalating hostilities and regroup. It was obvious that if they did not intervene now that the two would continue to annoy Y/N with their childish bickering. A game plan was needed, and Y/N knew the exact man to help come up with it.

Like my work? Read more here.

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Part One: Reigniting Old Feuds (Thranduil x poly!reader x Thorin)

This is part one of a request made by @satans-bitch.

Original request: "the reader being in a polyamorous relationship with Thranduil and Thorin but recently they have both been getting jealous of each other so the reader has to help them sort their shit out cause they keep annoying the reader with their bickering."

Y/N had grown up on tales of Dale as a small child. A magnificent city of opportunity, trade, and hope with bustling paved streets and stone watchtowers that touched the sky. The city whose rivers ran gold with wealth and no man, women, or child suffered. Until the Sack of Erebor had forced its residents to flee down the mountain to escape the jaws of the dragon as he left his hoard to feast. Since then, tales of longing had been passed down from parent to child aching for the day Dale could be reclaimed.

Unlike many of Dale’s descendants who had built a new home upon the lake, Y/N’s ancestors had fled further from the jaws of the dragon to the edge of Mirkwood. By no means a glamorous life, the small village offered safety and security away from the shadow of the mountain. Yet it was still close enough that word of Smaug’s defeat had reached the village quickly. Packing up what little supplies and labour you could spare, you’d made for your ancestral home.

While expecting the city to have been somewhat damaged from Smaug’s night raids, the corpses of orc, goblin, man, elf, and dwarf had been unexpected. Y/N  quickly came to learn the reason; the Battle of the Five Armies. So, the cleanup began, determination to see the beauty of the city restored bringing Y/N into the service of Bard the Dragonslayer, newly named king of Dale. The pairs shared goals brought a quick and easy friendship, with the King appointing them one of his advisors.

It was within this role Y/N came to know both the King of Carven Stone and the Elven-King. After their reluctant truce against their orcish enemy, it was decided in the months following the war that the three would meet in Dale to attempt to rekindle treaties of old. Under the impression it would only be the three of them meeting for the first greeting both kings were taken off guard when Bard announced another would be joining them. Yet neither king had protested once they laid eyes upon the human joining them. While Bard had initially requested your attendance as a mediator between the three, he soon noticed each king stealing glances at Y/N when he thought no one was looking. 

Outside of the trade talks each king began to seek Y/N out. The excuse of asking their opinion on Dale’s trade needs and desires was used by each king to bridge the gap and invite them to dinner. From there Y/N’s connection with each monarch flourished. Each lavished Y/N with attention and trinkets over the first fortnight of the talks. But the fixations of their rival on their new beloved did not escape either king.

Trade talks devolved into arguments and heated glares across the table despite Bard and Y/N’s placating. The King of Dale began to regret bringing Y/N into the talks despite their prowess as an advisor. While he recognised it was not their fault, Y/N had become a source of tension between Thranduil and Thorin. Y/N found themselves in a precarious situation.

While on one hand Y/N wished to step back from the talks and the kings hoping that it would calm tempers. They knew it would not be easy nor polite to ignore the requests of a king. A selfish part of Y/N didn’t want to step away either, desperate to remain as close to the pair as possible for the short amount of time they had left together before the discussion ended. There was the potential that they may never see one another again.

Yet that would not be the case. In the final days of the gathering each King made their way to Y/N to confess their feelings. The Elven King came to confess first, inviting them on a stroll under the stars. Thranduil was silver tongued, waxing together elegant declarations of admiration. While the king generally refused to speak of his first wife, Thranduil had stressed that in the centuries since her loss he had never felt so strongly for another. It was as though Y/N had hung the stars back into a sky that had been drained of all colours. If she would have him then Thranduil would be theirs for eternity. His confessions had taken the human by surprise and well assuring Thranduil she was just as interested in him Y/N had asked for time to think his proposition over.

Not to be out done Thorin appeared upon Y/N’s doorstep at first light the next day. Whisking Y/N away to his own private residence, they were greeted by an extraordinary feast upon the dining table. After breaking their fast Thorin was quick to assert the depths of his feelings, his surety that after all this time Y/N was his one, and his intentions to court them officially should they accept. Flattered Y/N had assured Thorin of their admiration for him but let slip Thranduil’s proposition from the night before. The Dwarven King’s blood boiled at the thought of the Elven scum anywhere near Y/N but honouring their request for time to mull everything over he bit back his jealousy.

After Thorin’s confession a very flustered Y/N had burst into Bard’s home seeking his counsel. Once he had been filled in on the situation by his distressed friend, the King of Dale made the decision to send out envoys to each of the Kings requesting that trade talks be paused until the situation was resolved. Over a very early pint Bard gave Y/N some much needed hard advice; they should follow their heart but keep in mind that any decision to choose one king over the other could be the spark to rekindle Dwarven/Elven feuds. A bitter tea to swallow but something Y/N knew in their heart to be true; the last few meetings had demonstrated it to no fault. While Y/N was open to the possibility of a polyamorous relationship it was doubtful that two kings, let alone two people who barely got along, would accept such a proposal. Retiring to their home for the rest of the day Y/N knew what had to be done. Each suitor would have to be notified that for the benefit of the three kingdoms Y/N could not accept either betrothal. With any luck the sting of rejection would not sour anything further.

Part two is available now! Check out more of my works here.