ventedinventedout - Tumblr blog

[ventedinventedout]

Hello fellows!

It has been a good year and more and in a few days I’ll be deleting all the memories of this account of mine. Therefore of, I’ll be moving my blog into a new one. Don’t worry, same address, same content. 

Thank you for the reblogs, I hope starting over again will be at ease. Ily guys.

-L

[ventedinventedout]

There will come a time when we’ll lose our ability to control our words and end up making things worse - and make the pain more vulnerable in every action done.

Artwork by Yan Tamba. Berlin-ArtParasites.

[ventedinventedout]

“And when you’re deep in that love, that’s when you finally feel the pain and anguish that it had stored from the beginning.”

Artwork by Alexandra Levasseur (Berlin-artparasites)

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“You don’t have to sacrifice whatever you have to achieve something wonderful for the sake of physical image - pleasing others through having to compromise your welfare isn’t what born to do.”

Berlin ArtParasites Art by Adiessketchbook

[ventedinventedout]

You are loved. No matter what they say, no matter what happens, no matter how many people come and go. You are loved - secretly and unknowingly.

Chinupgirl

[ventedinventedout]

I am deep, deep in your love, deep among the sea of your hugs and kisses. Too deep to even recover to the surface and I don’t ever regret being this deep.

Painting by Simon Birch (Berlin-ArtParasites)

[ventedinventedout]

Here’s a link to my personal blog, I hope you visit this, Thank you!

[ventedinventedout]

You are the light of my life, the sunshine of my morning, the sparkle in my glass of water. You are something I look forward to when I wake up and sleep. You light up my life, and some how brought joy from the darkness within me.

Alexander Harding’s Visible Light series (Berlin-Artparasites)

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You were never mine from the beginning.

I know I shouldn’t be this way. You had me on a chase of up’s and down’s, keeping me on my feet. I know from the beginning that you aren’t mine, but I still keep finding my way to you. 

(Artwork by Jo In Hyuk; Berlin Art Parasites)

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Fear

“Fear has been throughout my life. There’s nothing I could thank more but my sense of fear. Fear taught me to be wary, careful and be on guard around the people around me. It kept me on the ground pulled me back to where I am. I never wandered without Fear. He’s my best buddy” - In the mind of the Anxious and Paranoid

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“How extraordinary”

How extraordinary it is that a human being is capable of making mistakes, yet can still be considered perfect. I don’t remember any trace of wrong doing or any mark that has stained your name. A complete work of art you are to me.

How is that I find you this way when I shouldn’t be even tolerating your mistakes? It makes me guilty, covering your wrongs, cleaning you until black becomes white. What else can I say? I love you this much to take up everything you did.

Taking all the blame you did isn't the last thing in my mind, for me, being a martyr for you, -for us, is already everything to me. Like heavens opening up to show it’s paradise and envelop me in its arms.

You are extraordinary, simple, normal human being, yet your perfect - deadly perfect.

[ventedinventedout]

“Where were we when fate missed us?”

I ask myself that question since morning along the tears that drop and moist my pillow. I spent the night crying and thinking that I made a mistake in saying it. I only said it because I thought that there would be no chance between us. I shouldn't have said that, but my emotions drove me in doing so. I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say but I’m sorry.

I like you ever since I first hang out with you. I can still remember that chocolate you offered me from the gig you left just to be with me, and even on a short while, you set my heart in a whirlwind of emotions and set me smiling like a fool. I smiled a lot because of you. I find myself smiling after reading a text from you, I find myself smiling after being with you. If only you see my face whenever you accompany me wait a ride to go home or somewhere, and my back facing you, I’m actually smiling. deliriously happy, but all those happiness you gave me are pointless, for I thought that we were just friends.

I can still remember that heart-leaping moment when you asked me out on a date. Crappy movie with almost all seats taken, ice cream and shawarma tacos. Then after everything, it didn't turn out to be a date we expected. It was fine with me if it didn’t turn out in what we thought it should be, all I was thinking was I was with you, and I was happy. You said that “next time, it’ll be great-it’ll be better” adding that if only I had no curfew, we’d probably be out now somewhere and enjoy ourselves. A river of plans of what we would like to do, going in and out of our mouths and thoughts. We talked about it as if it would happen, as if we can both reach that time that we can do it.

I didn’t want to say goodbye when we’re together. I never wanted to say to goodbye when I’m with you.

I always had that thought in the back of my mind that you liked me too, and I held back every thought and courage to tell you for I might just humiliate myself. Haunted by “What if’s” and “Maybe’s”. I know you too much to know what you would say. Maybe that’s what it lead me to say it to you aggressively.

I like you is what I meant. Maybe too, that I was frustrated in how to say it to you. After finding out that I offended you from what I said that making me happy is pointless. I don’t know what made you mad in that short sentence but I still cried. I cried from the thought that I made you mad, that I made you angry, that I made you frustrated and off with me. I don’t want to push you away. I like you.

Half asleep, I asked you if you liked me. I didn’t expect any direct answer of sort, and you said “yes” that you did like me. My world turned upside down. I wish I knew it earlier, I wish I knew it before what I said last night. I felt weak. I controlled myself from saying more, for asking more questions. I feel like it’s enough. I’m too tired to dwell on it further.

What you last said didn’t haunt me. I’m tired. I wish that we had a chance to know it earlier during that time we were at that coffee shop. I wish I knew that those eyes, bright and full of joy, looking at mine as if longing and wanting to say something, meant that there were more of this friendship we had. From the way you talk, the way you look, and the way you smile. I loose myself in the pool of your eyes. I loose myself whenever you’re in my presence.

I still kept the tickets from the movie. The holi powder. I still kept every bit that I know of you. Literal and metamorphic.