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My adult self confronting my young self for stupid shit i pulled off in the past

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lord forgive me but I may have to make a nonessential purchase
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hard to tell anything apart these days. is this growing or grieving? am i hurting or healing? is this comfortable feeling or familiar numbness?
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never understood the whole showing up at your high school reunion revenge fantasy cause like really? high school?? I don’t want anyone from that time in my life to have any idea where I am or what I’m doing. do not perceive me I am dead to you and you are dead to me
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