wizardpartier

[wizardpartier]

big fan of this cry for help my coworker drew in the storage room

[wizardpartier]

[wizardpartier]

Kind of a Reddit AITA post but sometimes it is a little funny to fuck with people in ways that deliberately conform to a stereotype of what they must think of you. the other day I was talking to my friend and I randomly said that I wanted a pet chimpanzee. I'd dress it in person clothes (dungarees and hats) and I'd teach it to love science fiction. And this girl nearby was like "you know how dangerous those things are, right? Also how unethical it is to keep an ape as your pet for your own amusement" and I was already seeing where the conversation was going so I was pretending ignorance like "yea but it wouldn't just be for my amusement. It would have practical points too." And she ignored that statement entirely to say "Well chimpanzees can rip faces off" and I was like. What's the most frustrating thing I can say now. Finally settled on "Mine wouldn't do that though." and you could tell she wanted to hurt me very very badly. Like a chimpanzee would if I had one as a pet

[wizardpartier]

Kink and Fetish patch notes

Class and Ability Changes:

Due to increased popularity of the "Pup" subclass in Petplay builds, for balance reasons we are nerfing their low level abilities including "being leashed" and "wearing a puphood." to keep things fair, though, we're also rewarding those who heavily invest in late-game abilities by buffing "sleeping in a cage" and "clicker training."

Findoms abilities have been nerfed across the board in an effort to give Paypig players a better chance to continue playing. We're monitoring the situation.

Daddy players have lost their buffs from the Father's Day event

We are aware of the disparity between Top players and Bottom players, so we're removing the "Can Host" ability as a requirement for Top players in an effort to rally numbers up.

Drastically lowered the requirements to spec into Furry class

Added character "Oath Breaker Knight" for some players to restore their previous classes for a small fee (Gold Star Lesbian class should be a bit easier to spec into now)

Item Changes:

As mentioned above, items "Puphood" and "Collar & Leash" have been nerfed

Rebalanced "Chastity Cage" item effectiveness depending on player stats

Food items have been buffed to increased effectiveness

Fixed a broken interaction with the "Gag" class of items pertaining to the "Safeword" ability

Added new item combo interactions with other items, abilities, fetishes, and/or kinks. (Try out using the "Blindfold" and "Bondage Rope" items with the Piss fetish for the Urinal interaction.)

Fetish Changes:

Piss has been nerfed from Very Rare to Uncommon

Armpit has been nerfed from Rare to Common

Bondage has been nerfed from Uncommon to Common

Hypnosis has been nerfed from Legendary to Rare

Cuckolding has been nerfed from Uncommon to Common

Eye Contact has been buffed from Common to Rare

Condom Usage has been buffed from Common to Rare

Added new Very Rare fetish: Tongue Soaking

Added new Legendary fetish: Ghost Penis

Misc. Changes:

Fixed a glitch that low level players get the "Freak" banner usually granted at a much higher level

Further fixes to keeping servers seperated

Temporarily added more PVP options for Pride Month event

[wizardpartier]

normalize taking drugs just to fit in and make your friends think you're cool

[wizardpartier]

[wizardpartier]

[wizardpartier]

say what you will about trisha paytas but she had her finger on the pulse with this one

[wizardpartier]

I definitely must’ve missed a lot of Steven Universe bc how the heck did Lars went from “convenience store clerk to Captain Harlock”???

[wizardpartier]

it’s like this.

if you only have one person in your life that you trust, you probably are always going to turn to that person when something shit happens. as well as whenever something good happens. or anything else. this is not inherently a bad thing, and it’s really beautiful to have someone in your life that you trust so much

but if that person is suddenly busy or going through something difficult themselves or doesn’t have emotional capacity for a while, suddenly there’s a problem. not necessarily through any fault of your own, you don’t have anyone to turn to with as much regularity as you did before

this is true of any kind of relationship. this is true of any kind of coping mechanism, also. the problem is not that you trust that person. the problem is not that you use that coping mechanism. the problem is not even that there’s something wrong with you and that it’s all your fault. the problem is that nothing can be everything

the solution is not to cut off your one trusted person or to cut yourself off from your one trusted coping mechanism. the solution is to do the difficult work of diversifying your life as much as it’s possible for you to do. which is why it sucks so much when external factors prevent you from being able to live a truly diverse life. okay that’s all have a good one

[wizardpartier]

twitter is hell but i really hope it doesn’t actually die because this is in contention for the funniest thing i’ve ever read in my life

[wizardpartier]

My casino has new top-of-the-line technology to stop heists: a montage detector. If those bastards want to break in and steal my money, they’re doing it as part of one, long take

[wizardpartier]

i hate dogs with blue eyes. why is fucking jeff the killer at my back door

[wizardpartier]

need my Tits wet with lobster butter .com

[wizardpartier]

REMEMBER:

if you don't understand the post at a glance it's because op wrote it wrong and needs your help

if the post doesn't contain all the contextualising information you need to understand it, op is gaslighting you

if you haven't experienced the phenomenon the post describes, op is making it up for clout

if you haven't encountered the type of person the post describes, they're a strawman that doesn't exist

if the post doesn't address a topic you'd prefer to talk about, it's a distraction, missing the point, and talking over you

if the post makes a good point, it is your duty to contribute to human enlightenment by nitpicking it to be more correct

and most importantly:

every online conversation is a competition and you must win

[wizardpartier]

i actually need to get fucked nastystyle it's dire out here ladies. Doing hand stuff with my roommate was fun and all but tragically I think that just woke up the beast 😭

[wizardpartier]

the "trans inclusive radical misogynist" joke is unfunny for myriad reasons but chief among them is, like, for the logic of the joke to work it implicitly requires the belief that transmisogyny is not misogyny and that the default approach towards trans women is not already to impose violent and dehumanizing levels of misogyny on them