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Hello, Police? I accidentally stepped on my cats foot and need to be arrested
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me: yeah im really tough
me: [gets scared by text notifications when they’re too loud]
me: [easily startled when people tap me on the shoulder]
me: [cries under any sort of pressure ever]
me: [cries when anyone raises their voice higher than their average volume]
me: so tough
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knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit
wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad
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play with me
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taking selfies with my friends like
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singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth
then it just becomes a soap opera
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