wordingworlds

[wordingworlds]

The body knows

The short waves of winter sunlight cross my body

meeting and mixing with the short waves of my grieving

and with the long waves of my yearning.

[wordingworlds]

Outlier VIII

another heavy day on planet Earth

be cheerful! but i can't

a new rebel heat day

the climate outlier annunciate

the same unspeakable violence

the rubble, the blackout and the chants unsilenced

[wordingworlds]

Outlier(s) VII

Early September just like mid April brought four days of rebel heat.

Hot sun piercing my neck

NYC's air is thick as goo.

This unseasonable swamp is a heavy woe.

Just like the news of an Omega block in Europe,

uniting the Mediterranean through extreme heat and flash floods,

taking all in their wake like syrup.

It's hard to process wet-bulb globe temperatures,

plum colored bar charts,

uneven cooling opportunities.

I wear jumpers at work while Central Pakistan's hospitals struggle to cool wards full with people weakened by heat strokes.

Empty dispensaries swept away in previous floods.

When the night rolls in

many bodies still aren't cooling,

no sound asleep, no respite in this heavy heat.

[wordingworlds]

better I end this now

you careless extractivism, so subtly manipulative pushed my avoidant self to its limit.

my aptitude for fantasy, complicit in your repressed need to be degraded, became a liminal reality I can no longer navigate without meaning what I say.

i will teach you boundaries by feasting your shit hole with my butt plug.

[wordingworlds]

topping

I was threading the line of  - am I happy to be your lover? - without any fuss

full of lust,

I was the crispy onion add-on to your - is it flavorful? - poke bowl.

[wordingworlds]

Outlier(s) VI

I hear the energy intense comfort of A/C

the uneven privilege

the adaptation sacrilege

the debilitating feeling between you and me.

[wordingworlds]

Outlier(s) V

All over record breaking extremes

united by contorting patters of the jet stream

under the heat dome

news hysteria quaking on the phone

counting rebel heat days

compounding months of drip-style rain back home

any rice paddy fields in Piedmont this year?

it’s brown field patchworks

yellow grasses

sepia pine trees

do drought colors whisper death in your ear?

[wordingworlds]

Room mate 101

Your gaze and voice make me docile and feral at the same-time,

but I must be a stick of defused dyna-mite.

Primordial chemistry with no rational insight,

a flaring mind nervous to catch your sight.

[wordingworlds]

Outlier IV

A two-day break in the winter cold

this warmer pleasantry you wish took hold

is a portal into a season too soon to call.

Tipping points are in the making

and this planet’s systems are drastically changing

and when in 24 hours rebel heat turns into snow

it’s a dissonant relief fo sho.

[wordingworlds]

Whole

Lately only parts of me were loved IRL,

the parts that were shared, most relatable, less obscure.

Lately I’m being nudged without touch on social media,

the frictionless, effortless hinting that hides from engagement with any parts.

Whether with friction or without, love life looks like the bite in the apple.

[wordingworlds]

Cause for celebration

That blinding light of snow white

This pungent scent of frozen water delight

NYC finally at the right seasonal temperature y’all, hang tight!

[wordingworlds]

Outlier III

Multiple systems collapsing

Your senses know but you ignore

Another rebel heat day you bore

December-style cold lapsing

[wordingworlds]

Catching up

Do you have time for a catch up now?

A catch up? The one of words or the one of sex?

[wordingworlds]

Outlier II

The XMas Market is up

A new rebel heat day pulls up

I bite into my falafel sandwich

My lip curls, a slight twitch

[wordingworlds]

Outlier I

Rebel heat days

In fall they blaze

My rampant weltschmerz

Sweet siestas in pairs

[wordingworlds]

Intact

“I’d be happy to see you again’’ you said two weeks ago.

You repeated it 5 days later.

But what you meant was ‘‘It was nice meeting you, but I don’t feel I want to engage in emotional romance with you”.

It seems you cannot speak the weight of your own feelings. So much for “Communication” being a hallmark of a good relationship for you.

This outcome was for the best.

p.s: clearly I liked the chemistry

[wordingworlds]

Discomfort zone

I agreed to share, to be open,

because you’re younger and I didn’t think

I would feel so excited to be in the intoxication of your presence

as you hug my waist line I forget what you just said

‘I like her’.

the discomfort zone just got wider and I let it eat me for a minute

I lock my lips to yours as you eat me like a citrus

When I’m with you I’m with you minus her.

Will I be overwhelmed?